For example, those of us who can’t afford the famed Theory dress pants yet, the Express “editor” pant has a great fit. I have a curvier frame, so I often have trouble finding dress pants that fit well- they either go into “grandma” category, or wind up looking entirely inappropriate and too tight in the wrong places. However, I have several pairs from Express that look wonderful for the office. There’s a variety of lengths, colors and fabrics available, and my only caveat here is that you should choose the heavier fabric- it just maintains a more professional look throughout the day.

I’ve also found happiness with some of their more conservatively cut sweaters and blouses (they do exist!) and pencil skirts (I’m only 5’5”, so length generally isn’t my problem).

She doesn’t need clothes that are boxier — she needs something more sophisticated. She should look for items with rich, subtle textures, and should try some more mature jewelry (the requisite pearl of faux pearl studs would be fine).

Brooks Brothers is a good recommendation, but their clothes *are* boxy. She could also do okay at Theory. Their silouettes are less dowdy but the fabrics and details impart some complexity that shitty shit clothes lack. For a splurge I would also try Ports.

Also, someone who says that in order to appear more professional I need to dress “frumpier” is not someone I’d be too quick to take specific fashion advice from.

1. When you ask a man for advice, or tell him you have a problem, he often feels obligated to provide advice or a way to fix the problem, whether or not he actually is secure in what he is saying. It is part of the charm of the men in our lives. The trick is to consider the advice on its merits. Maybe it is valuable; maybe he just couldn’t bring himself to say “I honestly don’t know.” That is not a criticism of men. It is part of their charm — and part of the reason I take my problems to them. At least I know I may actually get a solution set.

2. The hardest situation professionally is to be the only woman in an office, or the only young woman in an office. I have been in one or the other category for 25 years. Comments, jokes, and sarcastic put downs about you being yourself will make you think you need to act like a man. In your attempt not to smile so much, to be less cheerful, and not to say nice things about people — not to mention never to wear anything colorful or fashionable — you will slowly drive yourself mad. You will be miserable. And you will be sabotaging your career. The high quality men in your office appreciate women being women. I am finally at the top of my profession. I am still the only woman at staff meetings, but the men who used to make sarcastic comments about my “lack of gravitas” are now junior to me. My boss — an immensely powerful person — sent me a note at Christmas: “Thank you for brightening up the office and taking care of people around you.” Twenty years ago, I would have been offended. Now I know he appreciates me being me. Find a way to be your essential self.