Suit of the Week: Ann Taylor

Ann Taylor Moto Tweed JacketFor busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional.

I hate (hate!) when models try to do high fashion poses in suits — it always just looks so silly. Is this the chicken en route to work? The flamingo? A mix thereof? Anyhoo: that said, it looks like a cute suit. I like that the moto jacket picks up on the trend but in a sophisticated way, and I always like a navy flecked tweed. The skirt and jacket both look wearable as separates, too, which is always a plus. Another big plus: the 50% off sale Ann Taylor is having — with code ANNGIFT the entire suit comes down to $134. The jacket (Ann Taylor Moto Tweed Jacket) was $179, but comes down to $89.50, and the skirt (Ann Taylor Faux Leather Waist Tweed Skirt) was $89, but comes down to $45 with code. Nice!

Ann Taylor Moto Tweed Jacket 2 Ann Taylor Faux Leather Waist Tweed Skirt

(L-5)

Comments

  1. I was thinking about the comment in the morning thread about how a wedding is the only occasion that everyone’s loved ones are guaranteed to come together to celebrate, and it really hit me. I wish there were other milestones in life that we considered as important as weddings so there were more opportunities to bring all our loved ones together.

    Sorry, not really a point to this… just my mind wandering on a rather slow Thursday afternoon.

    • I read something to that effect the other day, and can’t remember where I read it. But it basically bemoaned that we celebrate weddings and baby showers, but don’t do the same for other accomplishments. No “Graduated College Receptions” with gifts for your new better-educated life or “Promotion Showers” where you get a briefcase and suit separates.

      Frustrating that we still celebrate marriage and babies as the pinacles of female achievement.

      • Accomplished but not married :

        It’s particularly frustrating for those of us who haven’t married or had children. I certainly don’t begrudge my married friends their weddings and baby showers and gifts for those important occasions. I do, however, get a bit sad that my accomplishments don’t seem to warrant socially acceptable celebrations and instead can be read as self congratulatory or arrogant.

        • I agree with your last sentence so much.

          “Guess what? I’m pregnant!” = people are super excited for you

          “Guess what? I just got promoted/just got a raise!” = people think you are a braggy jerk

          Which is doubly bizarre considering that the first accomplishment is luck of biology and the second is typically through hard work and effort.

          • You need better acquaintances. People in my circles are overjoyed with professional accomplishments, ESPECIALLY married w/children types who aren’t focused on their careers.

            And you know what? We’re allowed to throw parties for whatever reason we want. So if you want to have a huge@$$ party just because it’s March 3, go for it.

          • Anonymous :

            Second the better acquaintances thing. All of my [married with children] friends are always super excited and eager to hear about work accomplishments. They always ask me about work without prompting.

          • This * 1000
            Just found out about my biggest bonus number last week and a promotion, but this is obviously not something I can announce on facebook or even take a group of friends out to celebrate (try coordinating with everyone’s “real” busy lives of SO/babies/holidays etc). I worked damn hard for this, several weekends and late nights alone in the office, stress anxiety and self-doubt whether I can do it all, what if I really screw up. When it all finally worked out, it is a very lonely celebration.

            Even my own mother sounded totally umimpressed, ignored and moved on to talking about the weather and sighing how I am growing old every day and there is no man in sight, my life is stuck in rut. thanks mom !!

          • AnnonFoo, congratulations! That must have been a lot of hard work, you totally deserve to celebrate in any way you want to!
            You can always tell us on here. I’m sorry your real-life friends and mom weren’t more supportive.

          • I agree that it’s dumb not to be excited for a friend who makes a big stride careerwise (and I am, and so are my friends) — but isn’t part of why the career stuff is seen as “braggy” precisely that, that it’s due to your hard work and merit? As opposed to pure luck, which you can’t really brag about? I absolutely don’t agree that it’s arrogant to celebrate career success, but I’ve always assumed the reason people might think so is that it does actually say more about you than something like a pregnancy.

          • Anonymous :

            “So if you want to have a huge@$$ party just because it’s March 3, go for it.”

            Oh man, you just gave me an idea. I want to start hosting an annual “It’s October 3″ party.

          • Cheers to AnnonFoo!!

      • I was the one talking about this this morning, as part of my ambivalence in having a wedding. As with many issues, there’s a SATC episode about it–when Carrie loses her designer shoes at her friend’s party and “registers” at (is it Manolo Blahnik?) for a replacement pair, because her married mom friend has never given her anything to honor any event in her single, child-free life.

      • Tons of people have graduation parties. Especially after high school, where everyone gives you cash.

      • Eh, I don’t think anything is stopping anyone from having a graduation parties or milestone birthday parties. Same for various coming of age religious celebrations. You can invite whoever you want. I don’t really see the celebration of babies and marriage as a male/female thing. Is there some standard male achievement party tradition?

        • You can certainly invite whomever you want, but my point was that many won’t come, especially from a distance. There is no other celebration in one’s life in which friends and relatives are so strongly expected to participate, that has anything like a wedding budget, or that draws the same validation, and I just wish this was more adjustable based on circumstances.

          • yes, exactly

          • S in Chicago :

            Yup. Even the baby shower thing isn’t the same. Weddings and funerals are the only must-dos. The funeral part always really, really hits me. When my grandmother passed at 87, her 83 year-old sister flew from California to Ohio by herself and then joined a relative for a long car ride to get to the rural area where the funeral was held. There is nothing sadder than seeing a tiny old lady kneeling before a casket and saying how good it was to finally see her again and thinking how much it would have meant if the two of them could have actually visited together before the end came. Just so sad that you basically get the two events pulling people with a commitment like none other.

          • Maybe it depends on the culture?

            When my SO and his sister graduated (same weekend), there was family flying in from a few states away to come enjoy the celebration. This is a Filipino family, though.

        • Lady Harriet :

          +1

        • I don’t know. I bet if I through a big fancy party, on par with what you’d expect at a typical wedding, you might be surprised by who makes the effort to attend. My Aunt and Uncle threw a “house opening” party when they finished completion of their dream house, and it was a blast. But no one is going to throw that party for you (just as no one throws your wedding for you, unless maybe you get married very young). If you want to celebrate, I bet you’d find that lots of people would love the excuse.

          • Merabella :

            I agree with this statement. Mostly that people don’t throw “I got a promotion!” parties that cost upwards of $25,000, but I bet that people would be happy to drink free boozy cheers to you if you did.

      • Maybe this is regional, but almost everyone I knew had a graduation party after high school, college and graduate school. And typically got a ton of cash at each of these or more sentimental or useful gifts.

        • chicago chic :

          We never did this…. my parents disliked such parties as clear “gift grabs” and we never had them. When my aunt gave me a generous gift certificate after I finished my Medical Residency (!), I was so floored and felt so awkward since I had never received a gift like this before. It was so so nice, as I was really struggling $$ wise and I could buy a beautiful winter coat once I moved to chilly Chicago!

          I think it varies a lot with the family, and with the social circle. We were pretty middle class/struggling for $$ at times.

        • +1 on the “maybe this is regional”

          My cousin and I had a joint high school graudation party – it was a casual BBQ at my parents, but almost 200 people came over the course of a few hours and I got almost $1500 in cash, plus tons of gifts. My cousin was about the same. This is totally normal where I’m from. My family had a party when I graduated college, and family came in from several states for the occassion. Same thing when my husband finished graduate school.

          There’s a family in my home town that started throwing a “just because” party in the fall every year, and they easily have 150 people every year; And it’s a mix of friends/family, in-town and out-of-town guest.

      • It would be nice, but can you imagine having to go to one of these for everyone you know, even if it’s only every 10 years or so? Yikes.

      • Sydney Bristow :

        My family actually does do high school and college graduation parties. I read that piece this morning. I think it was on Huffington Post.

        We don’t do big parties for things like promotions, but my friends or family typically do a celebratory dinner. I like to celebrate lots of things!

      • anon-oh-no :

        i had a huge party joined by many when i graduated from both college and law school. and received many of the gifts you describe. and i know many others that did this. FWIW, college was west coast, law school was mid west.

      • Being the first person in my family to finish university, my parents threw a giant celebration complete with bounce house!

      • SoCalAtty :
      • AttiredAttorney :
      • Lily-Student :

        My family has a tradition of having a big celebration for turning 18 or 21 – I’m planning to delay it until I graduate from uni, as I feel that’s more of an achievement!

    • Anonymous :

      This is honestly the reason I had a wedding. I could not think of another occasion where all our friends and families would be together in one place. If I could do it over again, I think I would skip the wedding and throw a huge 10 or 15 year anniversary party. But, who knows if people would come to that!

      • That sound awesome and that is really something to celebrate! Getting married is the easy part…staying married for 15 years deserves a party!

    • I got so excited about it being Thursday afternoon! But sadly, it’s only Wednesday afternoon in my neck of the woods…and my clients have suddenly discovered that there are only 7 working days left before 2014, and have all gone CRAZY.

    • It could depend on the family. I have two large extended families and they both make an effort to have a reunion/gathering every 2 to 3 years. So, it doesn’t necessarily celebrate anything in particular, but you still have a grand familial get together on the scale of wedding attendance.

      But now you actually have time to sit and talk because you don’t have a big party to orchestrate. Life is what you make it.

      • My husband’s family does this too.

      • KS IT Chick :

        One of my mom’s cousins announced 43 years ago that he wanted a reason to get together other than a funeral. The “Association of First Cousins” had the first reunion about 6 months later.

        I’m 41, and I can count on one hand the number of reunions that didn’t happen over the years. We now have an “Association of Second Cousins” who have taken over the planning & execution of the reunions. Those who had kids are trying to make sure that the children are well acquainted with the rest of the age cohort that they will eventually want to continue on the traditions, too.

    • Yes, this. And this is going to sound so greedy and terrible, but I get frustrated that there is still this outdated rule that the only time you are allowed to ask for “stuff” is for a wedding, or maybe for a new house. My sister is younger and yet has a TON of amazing house and kitchen stuff they got for their wedding. My mom has a full le creuset set that she got for a wedding gift. But if I want things for my home, I have to buy them for myself, or get one here or there for birthdays/holidays. So, if I never get married or buy a home, I just don’t get to have the same benefit of having big ticket gifts? And, even if I do get married someday, I’m already older and have started compiling my own home, so I won’t need the same amount of stuff. It just seems unfair to still base all of the ‘gift giving’ from your friends/family on the old system of young people getting married and getting a house together immediately after college. Rawr. Yeah, i’m a shallow, materialistic brat. ;o)

      • A Woman's Right to Shoes :

        I hear you though. I spent my 20s in law school eating off of correl with second hand stainless utensils and none of my towels matched. My married friends had weddings paid for by their families at which they got crystal, china, silver, and matching towel sets. It was nice to visit them!

        What I always hated was as the singleton, if I visited someone along with the married couple, I always got a couch in a living room and they always got a bedroom. So even if the living room had two couches, no couple there, just me with a choice. THAT is what I hated — I could deal with the lack of stuff, but not being a second class of guest.

        • I don’t know, I was married and eating off Corelle for a long time. I have a newer set now (25 years later); it’s from Target.

          • +1 – When I switched to Corelle it was a step up for me from my matching Walmart plate and bowl set!

      • I hear you gal, actually this year I bought myself a le crueset dutch oven and an all clad saute pan. Enough of buying everyone wedding gifts and waiting for my own wedding, I deserve good quality kitchen stuff for myself especially because I love to cook. Right now I am actually thinking of getting quality dinner plates and silverware from williams sonoma, stuff people put on registries. Sure I eat dinner alone watching TV, but nice plates and spoons are not off limits if I can afford it.

        • Donna Meagle told me to tell you you should totes Treat Yo’ Self! And buy the nice stuff you want to have! ;o)

          The other factor for me is that I have chosen to work in the nonprofit world, so I don’t have the funds to pay for these things for myself. And then there’s even more pressure at work, i call it the Martyr Complex.. but that’s a whole other story. And, like Monday said above, it’s just the bummer of feeling like the only things that get acknowledged by others still are getting married and having babies. That just feels like it is lagging so far behind other changes in the last century.

        • Senior Attorney :

          Do it, AnnonFoo. When I left Mr. Senior Attorney some months ago I left some of the nice wedding stuff behind because it was easier than fighting over it, and I bought myself replacements immediately. It’s awesome to be able to buy nice things ofr oneself and to use them every day in one’s Bachelorette pad. And really, in the scheme of things, for stuff you use every day, it’s not that hugely expensive.

        • Carrie Preston :

          I completely recommend doing this – I took the approach years ago that I didn’t want to “have to have a wedding” to have the lifestyle I wanted to live. That means I buy my own adult furniture/plates/cookware, etc. I’ve found doing all of that myself has really calmed my possible inner annoyance at not having “life events” that people buy you stuff for. I also revel in getting to choose my patterns and buy what I like in my style. If I ever do get married, I’d probably go with one of the “tacky” (per some people’s opionions) option of a honeymoon fund rather than a registry for stuff. You should totally buy your own things now if you’d like to have them. Same goes for a house, car, any other hallmarks of “adulthood.”

      • We got many nice gifts at our wedding, but I’m sure we would have done better if we’d just bought our own stuff and not paid for the wedding. Hosting a wedding is super expensive.

        You can just buy yourself the nice plates and cookware. It will likely cost you less than a wedding and you’ll get exactly what you want with no family drama!

      • You’re not a brat! I think of the multitude of wedding/baby shower/baby birth/wedding shower/christening gifts I have purchased over the years and honestly I get annoyed by my friends who did not reciprocate when my parents threw me a lovely law school graduation party. It stings. While I didn’t expect Le Creuset pots, I certainly thought they would give me something more than a cheap picture frame, a candle, or nothing. I was in the weddings of many of the women who attended my graduation party and most failed to even get me a card. If I announced my engagement and invited them to my wedding, I know they would give a gift. Most people just don’t care about the accomplishments like law school/med school graduation, promotions, etc. because society doesn’t place any importance on them. There’s not exactly a graduation party industrial complex along the same lines as the wedding industrial complex.

        • You said it. Sure we couldtry to celebrate our accomplishment but others just won’t reciprocate if it is not wedding/baby related even if we have spent for them on several occasions (shower, bacherlotte, wedding, baby shower and so on). I had the same experience, my celebrations are not worthy enough, forget about gifts many could not even find time to attend (even those in same town).

          • another anon :

            its not that yours are not worthy, its just that people assume you will eventually get married and have babies and then they will reciprocate.

        • Gail the Goldfish :

          My mom is still annoyed at my aunt and uncle that they in no way acknowledged my college and law school graduations, not even a card, especially since my mom got my cousin a nice college graduation present.

      • I’m right there with you. This might sound even shallower, but I’ve cried that my sister is having children and won’t be able to put as much effort into my hopefully future wedding as I did for her, including flying in three separate weekends before the wedding for dress shopping, bridal shower and bachelorette party.

      • Self-aware :

        Well at least you know you’re a shallow materialistic brat

    • Could it be that weddings/babies are wide celebrated because they are family milestones – building a family by marrying or giving birth or adopting? And that family events hold a different significance than career events? Birthdays, career promotions, raises – they are important (which is why you celebrate with dinner, a splurge, whatever), but they aren’t experiences that can be shared in the same way that weddings/babies can’t? Or that they haven’t been culturally?

      And does trying to equalize family and the work milestones come off a little as the “everyone gets a medal because everyone is a winner” mentality?

      I definitely don’t have the answers to the above questions, nor do I necessarily fall on one side of the line or the other, but those were the thoughts that came to mind in trying to think about why we might treat them differently.

      • Anonymous :

        I was having the same thoughts. I can’t imagine a world in which everyone’s celebrated for every milestone. Getting married or having a baby is different from simply moving out on your own. Moving out on your own is essentially just a symptom of aging. It seems to me that the above poster might be right that these have been culturally significant experiences because people feel that they want to contribute to the beginning of a “family unit.” They aren’t just solely individual “achievements”– if you can really call them that– the way a job promotion is.

        • But the point is that some of us NEVER marry so we are never celebrated. And that’s rotten.

          • Why does celebrated equal big party and lots of presents?

            Can’t it mean well-respected by work collegues? Valued by friends and family? Why are you measuring worth and value in the amount of attention and money people spend on you?

          • She didn’t say a big party = celebrated; nor did she say was measuring worth and value by the gifts.

      • So I definitely agree that everyone shouldn’t get a medal at work, in school, for sports etc because sometimes it just wasn’t earned. But this is LIFE! I do think everyone deserves a celebration for what is important to them. I can’t stomach the idea that some people just have to suck it up and watch others get recognized over and over for their entire lives. And I am no bleeding heart!

    • I would LOVE to be married! Why cant I find a decent guy? I am prepareing to go on vacation with Myrna and I will meet a guy worthy of me. That is what my mom said and I trust my mom. I will check in with the HIVE tomorrow b/c I have a great story about Alan and his mother, who I saw in Bloomie’s!

    • Coach Laura :

      I can definitely see (and agree with) the frustration of having spent time/money/effort for other’s weddings and baby births and not have a similar effort spent by others to recognize life events.

      After a funeral recently, a distant cousin said she didn’t want to just see family at funerals, so we are going to plan a fun reunion. Those without major celebrations in their futures (weddings, births) could establish a family tradition of a reunion, especially when one of the younger generation graduates from college/law/nursing/med school. Gifts would be optional, of course, but the joy of celebrating would be the point.

  2. This Suit :

    I like (not love, but when you factor in the price, that’s not bad for an outfit).

    But a satin shirt? And with that necklace?

    Can someone style it better — I am in a rut of solid shells, but there’s got to be something better than satin and something that you could get at Claire’s Boutique for prom as a necklace.

    • Seriously not a fan of how it is styled, either. And I am not sold on the length of the jacket sleeves with the blouse sleeves. That I not a look that I embrace. But I like the idea of this suit without the styling quite a bit.

    • The styling is dreadful. I’d wear this suit with a simple thin sweater. There is so much going on, that I would not add any texture. I would consider a pattern in coordinating colors, maybe a subtle dot or stripe.

  3. Nancy Blackett :

    PSA: suiting is on sale at Reiss. I bought my first splurge suit from there about 6 months ago and wear it all. the. time.

  4. anon in tejas :

    TJ with some good thoughts and (probably) obvious suggestions to handle some major family stress would be greatly appreciated.

    my dad had a lung biospy last week. good news is that it is stage 1, and likely no treatment after surgery. bad news is that my dad needs surgery and it’s pretty invasive and it’ll be next week.

    my partner and I live in the same city as my dad. lots of bad family dynamics around communication, honesty, respect and boundaries. I’ve been fielding phone calls, text messages and emails.

    work is slowing down, but it’s just been really hard for me. I’ve been crying most evenings, just because I am frustrated, sad, and worried. My partner has been great in taking care of me and talking me down. I am not sleeping well and I am definitely stress eating.

    My boss at work knows, and I am not paying as good attention to detail as I normally do.

    My dad doesn’t want me to tell anyone, which has also made it more difficult. My normal friend support system is cut off so to speak.

    suggestions on how to deal with the family stress? and take care of myself?

    • Couple of thoughts: don’t worry about the stress eating – if it’ll make you feel better, eat it. Take an OTC sleep aid if necessary – not having enough sleep will make everything else that’s going on seem 5x worse. Your dad said not to tell anyone, but does he know your friends? Will they tell his friends? I can see why he would want to keep it quiet within his own circle of family/friends, but I don’t think that means you can’t vent to a girlfriend over a glass of wine.

      • anon in tejas :

        thanks.

        my dearest friend I would call and rely on about this is a family friend. So, I am trying not to call her. I feel so kinda messy that I don’t think that I am actually wanting to talk to friends about it either. It’s really hard to do so without turning into a pile of tears and snot.

        • Does the hospital have a counselling resource, or a caregivers group or some other group of people to connect you with that are or have been in similar situations?

    • Hugs. I’m in the same boat, since this summer. In our case, the news changed from “major surgery” to “sorry, surgery won’t work – time for chemo/radiation.” It’s so stressful, and scary – and it’s like a speeding train you can’t stop, or control, and there’s really nothing anyone but a surgeon/oncologist can actually do about it.

      Here’s what is sort of working for me: Do Not Google, or, when you inevitably do, don’t believe the math you’re going to read. Lung cancer stats are really scary, but in a weird way, they also truly don’t apply to many cases. (Many of my friends who are doctors or in related fields have reassured me of this.)

      Family dynamics can definitely make it harder. Do you have siblings you can rely on? Is your partner’s family around and able to be a support?

      I have found my friends less helpful than co-workers and siblings, weirdly. Still, I think you are 100% within your rights to NOT listen to your dad’s request on this, and tell who you need to tell. It helps a lot, if only so they understand when you start bawling uncontrollably in the middle of social situations for no reason at all. If your manager knows and is compassionate, that helps a lot too. I definitely didn’t have much focus at work for a solid month after the news/during the drawn-out diagnosis stage.

      It’s great that your partner has been supportive. That’s been essential for me as well.. with a couple exceptions (which I attribute to his own emotional reactions and fear for my mom) I feel bad that he has had to cope with this/my emotional reactions, but on the other hand.. that’s what we do for each other as partners, right? And I frequently express my appreciation to him for his support and patience.

      What else — make sure to give yourself a break. Allow yourself space and time to be scared, and upset. Talk to people who are supportive (honestly – I really don’t think you should accept your dad’s wishes on this, because YOU are coping with this too). And if there’s anything concrete you can do, that helps a lot – for me, that’s been visiting and calling more frequently, and googling the hell out of medical information. NHS patient information brochures have excellent explanations of surgical procedures and other treatments (this sort of goes against “don’t google” – but I find medical information on what to expect from different procedures helpful – as opposed to statistics about cancer).

      LOTS OF HUGS. I hope your dad’s surgery goes well.

      • And I forgot to say – STAGE 1 IS AWESOME. That is SUCH good news, and so is speedy treatment.

        • anon in tejas :

          thank you. I am sending some good thoughts/prayers your way for you and your family. I wish the best for you and your dad.

          my partner is in nursing school, but my dad is relying on his brother and nephew who are doctors as well for advice. my partner has been staying out of that, but talking ot me and answering my questions, etc. My Dad has been relying all the cooks in the kitchen which make for confusing and conflicting informed and uninformed opinions. I am staying away from stats, because they are so fucking grim.

          I do have siblings, but they are making things worse (i.e sending emails about how this is my dad’s last christmas, etc.).

          ugh. Now I want to eat another chocolate bar.

    • I would tell my friends anyways. It’s not like they’re going to say anything to my dad. This stuff is scary and you need support. My dad has had surgery for cancer a few times now and I was a mess the first time. Best of luck to your dad!

      • anon in tejas :

        thanks.

        my best friend who I would call and rely on is the daughter of a family friend. If I told her, I’d effectively be telling her family which my dad would not be okay with. :(

  5. The model’s pose is me, every morning, trying to squeeze into my pre-pregnancy work wardrobe.

  6. Carcinoma :

    So, I have a thingie that I have to get biopsied tomorrow to see if it a carcinoma (not a melanoma). Has anyone else gone down this route? I’ve never been a person to be in the sun (but didn’t really do the sunscreen thing until I was in my 20s), so I’m a bit surprised at this.

    • Yes (both to the having gone through this and to finding it a complete shock to have to do so).
      Eye doctor found a mole on my retina. Out of “an abundance of caution” he sent me to the dermatologist for a full body scan. She found only 1 mole, removed it on the spot and had it biosied. Benign.

      Unless you have any reason to believe otherwise, just keep chanting benign, benign, benign. (It helps with the stress.)

    • If it’s for sure not a melanoma (although early stage melanoma can be fairly curable, so don’t panic yet)but instead a basal or squamous cell carcinoma, congratulations, you have an eminently curable form of cancer. Surgery for basal cell can be a bit involved – there is something called a Mohs procedure which I believe involves shaving off thin slices of skin over and over to make sure all the funky cells are gone. It can leave a scar, but this procedure was developed to maximize getting all the bad cells and minimize scarring.

      Most cancer registries don’t even track these forms of cancer – they are very common and very curable. Still, it’s smart to get them taken care of before they get too big.

    • I had basal cell carcinoma on my forehead about 5 years ago. I had the Mohs procedure. It was really not a big deal at all. Basal cell is the most common form of cancer and is easily treatable. It can either just be removed all at once (if it is in a non-visable area), or you can have Mohs if you are concerned about the scar. If you have Mohs, a specialist will slice off a thin layer of the mole and a bit of the surrounding area, then examine it under a microscope to see if he or she removed all of the cancerous cells. If they were all removed, the doctor stiches you up. If they need to take another slice, they do, and they examine again. The purpose it to take as little skin as possible so there isn’t more cosmetic damage than necessary (which is why Mohs is very common on areas like the face and neck). The only strange thing is that after the first cut, you have to sit in the waiting room with a bandage on the area while they examine the cells (but you are numb anyway, so more boring than anything else).

      I remember being a little shocked when my doctor told me I had cancer, but as soon as he explained what basal cell was, and that it will really only cause bone damage if left untreated, I felt better. The Mohs was pretty quick, and I was back in law school classes the following day.

      The point is, I wish you luck that it is benign, but if it is basal cell, don’t worry! You’ll be fine!

  7. (Former) Clueless Summer :

    LOVE Ann Taylor suit separates. Most of them are super wearable as separates but make a cute suit as well. I would love this blazer with a black sheath dress and the skirt would look great with a silk blouse on casual Friday. Just watch out for sizing. Got a similar fun suit from there recently and I had to go down a size in both the skirt and the jacket to a size that I never ever wear (unless from also super vanity sized J. Crew). It was insanely vanity sized. I don’t know how tiny people can shop there now, unless they are petite.

  8. Aqualover :

    Kat, I’ve gotta tell you. I am getting a “League of Angels” ad (looks like a video game). It is so distasteful and offensive, I am thinking of leaving the site. Yuck. Can you get rid of them or at least make the ads appearing on your site not a scantily-clad young female seductively taking her clothes off?

    • I am not saying it’s your fault, but I think those google ads have to do with other things you have looked at. I mentioned a sleep aid in my earlier response and now I see a Lunesta ad that wasn’t there before.

    • Well there are addons to prevent this sort of thing. Not that I want Kat to lose money, but I feel you.

      I tried letting Google put ads on my blog and that lasted about 4 hours. They promised the ads would be relevant to the topic of my blog and then put a completely off topic and offensive product on there. Nuked that arrangement immediately.

    • Clementine :

      I get Fancy Feast (100% dog person), a resort ad for the Wynn in Vegas (which I have no interest in going to) and loose tea.

      I always love seeing who the internet thinks I am.

    • Me too (I’m getting the same ad). It really is offensive, I normally don’t even notice the ads but this one is hard to miss. I thought it was an ad for a porn site, to give you an idea of the content.

    • Install an ad blocker? I realize this isn’t possible on some work computers, but it’s the only way to avoid seeing potentially offensive ads. It’s not reasonable for Kat not to have third party advertisers (who are the ones controlling the content of the ads) – she would make no money off of the site otherwise.

  9. Anonymous :

    I’m not sure if any of you remember my post, but here goes:

    Back in August I posted about how I had just started at a new job and my boss made a comment that my shoes and purse “sucke*d” (they were both nude patent leather). I was super upset about it because I take personal attacks like that, well personally. Anyway, I got over it and decided that I didn’t really care what they thought and that I’d wear whatever I so chose. I started wearing the purse and bag more often just because they hated them.

    So this morning I come in to work and there’s a paper on my chair. It’s a $350 e-gift certificate to Coach. I really appreciated the gift, I wouldn’t normally spend that kind of money on myself without guilt. I go tell them thank you and they follow with – now you can get rid of that rickety as*s purse. Wow…way to ruin a nice gift. Opinions?????? What do I do about this? I feel like the kid on the playground that’s wearing Walmart brand instead of Nike.

    • Anonymous :

      who the eff are these psychos!!!!!

      • Anonymous :

        You’ve never seen materialistic until you meet these two….not women, but MEN! These are MEN I’m talking about.

        • I had a boss like that once. He owned 3 cars (just for him, his wife had her own Mercedes SUV) and was like “image is everything.” He was a huge douche and I left as soon as I could find another job.

    • Well, your boss is a douchebag. I don’t know what I’d do about it – maybe have a talk and say that while you appreciate the gift, you find his comments about your fashion choices in appropriate and offensive. It’s hard to tell if he’s a mean douche or if he’s a clueless douche who thinks that ragging on you is a way of building camaraderie.

      • Anonymous :

        I think that really they’re just of the clueless douche variety that don’t know how to interact with women and so this is their way of building camaraderie.

        • Is it possible that they don’t see the word, “s_cked” as offensive, but rather were trying to tell you to wear slightly nicer stuff–not necessarily branded, just newer/nicer? I am trying to see this in the light most favorable to the do_chebags here….

          I would take that and go buy a really lovely purse at Coach. Or shoes. Or both. Even if it came from a weird place, I would still be glad to get it! I got a $300 coach purse as a going-away gift (from very close family friends) last year, and even though it’s really fancy, I love it so much. And I would never normally shop there, but this bag is not logoed at all and is just gorgeous. So I say, “take the money and run.”

          And maybe wear your awesome new shoes and bag to the interview you land in 2014 for your awesome potential new job. I’m just sayin….

          • Anonymous :

            The nude purse they were referring to was from Coach and the shoes were some brand from Nordstrom. It’s not like I look like I shop at a thrift store. I dress nice overall, I’m just not the type of person to drop serious money on my wardrobe.

          • It sounds more like a clueless douche scenario. You might want to let them know that you legitimately are offended by it and I bet they’ll stop. It reminds me of how my brothers act.

      • Yeah, F*ck Them. Seriously. Just write off what they said, laugh at them in your head. “Sorry you are so miserable and stupid, dudes. Must suck to be you.” Take the $350 and go buy WHATEVER YOU WANT. And then enjoy the F*CK out of it every time you use it. shoes, bag, whatever you want. And every time you use it, you get to think, “thanks, jerks, for giving me free money! Joke’s on you!!”

        And if they ever comment on your clothes/accessories ever again, I would just do a patronizing smile and nod, ‘uh huh’ and walk away or change the subject. They can say whatever they want, but you get to buy/wear whatever YOU want and there is nothing they can do about it! Too bad so sad!!

        • wildkitten :

          +2 Or you can sell the giftcard, if there’s nothing you want at Coach.

          • Anonymous :

            There are many lovely things at Coach that I like…but I’d just feel weird buying a purse and using it just to appease them. I’ll think about what to do with the gift card.

          • NOOOOOOO!!!! don’t let them being douchecanoes ruin it for you!!! Buy whatever YOU want that makes you happy and you are NOT doing it to appease them. You can also keep using your current purse for work whenever you want. But the $350 is your compensation (karmically) for them being obnoxious to you. make the most of it!! ;o)

    • Wow. I can’t decide if if is better to be judged behind your back or to be told to your face that you’re being judged. I can’t imagine co-workers actually saying something about shoes and bags, and although I have never gossiped about someone’s taste behind their back, I think a lot of people might.

      If you want to make a point, you can buy other stuff at Coach, like a laptop bag or silk scarves or even clothing (?). I actually don’t think their shoes are that comfortable, but I’d try their snow boots.

      I am sorry you work with such nasty folks.

    • Is it possible they think they’re being funny? My husband and his friends say TERRIBLE things to each other — make fat jokes (about the guys who actually are chubby), call each other’s belongings cheap, make fun of someone’s perceived low-status job, bring up past failures — I mean, things that if anyone said to me, I’d be devastated. But they LOVE each other. They are amazing friends to each other. My husband says guys are just like that. Is it possible this is their way of saying they like you and want to build camaraderie?

      • Anonymous :

        Honestly, I think this is exactly the case. When my husband came home to me crying on the couch after the shoe incident, he said honey I’m sorry you’re sad and then said that this is the way guys let each other know they love each other. I’ll never understand.

        • Anonymous :

          And I’m not a guy.

        • Can you take that $350 to Coach and buy them some really tacky ties? Or nude colored wallets, or something.

          • Anonymous :

            That would be hilarious! I could re-gift the gift. I could tell my boss – I noticed your love of ties and I saw this one and just HAD to get it for you. I hope you love it. And then he’ll think….oh man she has even worse taste than I thought.

          • “Since you guys appreciated the Coach purse I ALREADY OWN, I figured you should have something of your own. But really, you should have your wives do your shopping for you in the future.”

      • I know a story of a male client who shamelessly gave a male partner grief about his footwear. In fact, when the deal closed, he sent the partner a new pair of designer shoes. Weird? For sure, but they adored each other and had a great professional relationship.

    • Not to be devil’s advocate, but there has been plenty of discussion on this site in the past about how to approach assistants, summer associates, interns, and junior employees of all stripes about their lack of appropriate clothing. Is this that different? Isn’t it possible that the shoes & bag here (especially if they can be described as “rickety”) are not up to snuff for the OP’s professional position?

      These guys sound like clueless bullies because of how they went about it. But it also seems that they think they’re being helpful. As in, they already told your bag & shoes didn’t read as stylish or professional or whatever (*to them*) and you didn’t do anything with that feedback (including defending yourself or saying that you think they’re fine), so they assumed couldn’t afford to make a change? At the very least it seems like your boss is trying to help you look like a more polished professional… despite the as*holiness of his methods, is there some productive feedback you can glean from the persistent advice?

      Picking on someone this way isn’t cool. But it’s your boss. If he thinks you need help dressing professionally, it’s wise to heed his suggestions, within reason . . . while you are also looking for a new job with a better boss.

      • Anonymous :

        I work at an O&G company. People wear jeans and tennis shoes and sweatshirts. I wear dress pants, pencil skirts, button up skirts etc. I agree, if someone isn’t dressing for the part you should feel free to let them know. However, if I wear something that is just a matter of personal opinion I feel that NOTHING should be said about it.

        If my clothes are dirty or too revealing or too tight then feel free to say something about it.

        • Anonymous :

          I should add – the majority of the people here dress schlubby…these two are the only two who do not. I don’t wear jeans because I feel like I should dress more business casual to meet their level of attire.

    • saltylady :

      I love nude patent leather. Your boss is an asshat.

    • I had a boss who would always notice and make comments on what I wore (as in, noticing that almost everything I wear is from BR, or in one color only, or that my shoes are not always in the best condition). In the end it kind of became a running joke between us – he is a lot more fashion conscious and I, on the other hand, just don’t give a hoot. I’ll wear Targe t at work no problem. But he was an otherwise nice guy so I didn’t care. And I could (gently) make fun of his European man purse.

    • Since you’re getting repeated comments, maybe it’s time to consider that the purse is not office or appropriate or has seen better days.

      • If you are getting the same comments from lots of people, sure. But if it’s repeated comments from the same couple of people….meh, it’s more of a matter of taste then.

        And if they can’t articulate it any better than they have, I wouldn’t even give much credence to their tastes.

        • Anonymous :

          It’s a plain, nude, patent leather Coach bag that I bought last year. It still looks brand new. It is not torn up. It’s simply that they don’t like nude patent leather, that’s all.

          • another anon :

            if this is the case, why are you worrying about it? if you think its totally stylish and fine, who cares if they dont like it? take the gift certificate and buy something you want and forget about it. unless there is something more to the story . . . .

    • Anonymous :

      I JUST DECIDED WHAT I’M GOING TO DO WITH THE GIFT CARD PEOPLE (and yes that requires capitalization):

      I have a friend that works at a Coach store and she can get 50% off anything for the holidays (which is awesome!!!). I’m going to go buy as many little purses as I can for $350 (and 50% off). I bet I can get maybe 5 or 6. One of my best friends works on the cancer floor at Children’s Hospital – I will wrap up the little purses and take them to the teen girls for Christmas.

      When they ask what I got with the gift card I will tell them. Maybe then they’ll realize what they have.

      P.S. If you read my post from yesterday, I was the one who anonymously gave a $100 Nordstrom gift card to a girl that attends Arapahoe High School (where the shooting occured). I get more joy out of buying things for others than I do when I buy things for myself.

      • This is a great plan.

      • Olivia Pope :

        This is so much better than what I would have thought of. Good for you.

      • Great solution!

        I know your feelings are hurt by this, but it did kind of make me laugh. Ridiculous men. (But I would also go myself a new purse with the money, probably in a totally unprofessional color or style!)

      • Carcinoma :

        OMG you are awesome!

      • another anon :

        So . . . i had this thought yesterday but didnt say anything until you felt the need to post here AGAIN today about it. doing “selfless” things like that looses a lot of the selfless-ness when you go bragging about it to everyone. twice.

      • This is just the best.

      • Senior Attorney :

        Honestly, I am all for charity and doing good and I posted kudos on your thread yesterday, but this is starting to sound kind of passive-aggressive and self-aggrandizing and I cannot imagine it will improve your relationship with your bosses.

        • Blonde Lawyer :

          You and I seem to agree a lot, Senior Attorney. Anon, your idea is sweet but at the end of the day, you have to work with these guys. Buy a nice coach bag and use it for work. Play the game. Show them you appreciated the card. Maybe your boss just thinks patent nude leather is unprofessional. He may be wrong but he is the boss. If I thought someone needed an upgrade and I gave them money for the upgrade and they gave it away, I’d be pissed. This is probably your intended reaction but it is never good to have your bossed pissed at you. Also, it makes people who are less charitable really uncomfortable when you brag about your charitable good deeds. I don’t mean here on the site. I mean your materialistic bosses. They are not going to be proud of what you did. They will be annoyed. An annoyed boss or two is not a good way to keep your job.

          • SoCalAtty :

            Unfortunately, I’ll have to third this. Have to play the game, unless you want to use it as part of an epic “I quit” memo. In which case I’d endorse it, unless you needed a rec from old boss.

          • chicago chic :

            +1

            Absolutely.

            Donate your own money to charity – not theirs.

            Why are you trying to stretch out this silly saga, and annoy them? Let it go, let it die, buy a purse for yourself.

        • Wildkitten :

          More complete thoughts: I love the plan. I gave an old coach bag to my teenage cousin and was surprised at how much she appreciated something that I no longer appreciated (too small). I do find it a bit much to point out that you also gave the Nordstrom card to the Arapahoe girl yesterday, but it did inspire me to think about gifting my never-used gift cards to folks in need, so that post was a good reminder to me. However, I also agree that telling your bosses that you bought bags for the cancer girls is passive-aggressive. It’s a great idea of what to do, but the OP should give a genuine Thank You for the gift card and not say what she did with it.

      • Awwww that is so sweet!! Ok, I approve of this plan as well. ;o) what a great idea.

        I do still encourage you to ignore those guys and rock your shoes and bag because YOU love them!

      • This thread is getting weirder and weirder, and frankly, more unbelievable at every turn.

        Does Coach even make a bag in nude patent leather? And if so, would someone who claims she doesn’t even believe in spending a lot on clothes even buy it?

        The entertainment is enjoyable, but at least we know for sure that Ellen is a troll. I wonder how many more there are?

  10. petitecocotte :

    I bought this suit during the Black Friday sale. I like the pieces more as separates than together as an actual suit. (I’ve already worn the skirt to work three times–can’t figure out when/where to wear the jacket). The jacket is a fun spin on tweed and definitely on trend this season, but I don’t think it works with the skirt with the jacket zipped up. (I feel too covered up for some reason). I wish they sold a traditional suit jacket option in this material.

  11. Fleece Leggings :

    Just FYI – Since so many ‘rettes have been raving about the fleece leggings (particularly those from Walgreens), I stopped by by local Walgreens today to check them out. They were on sale 2 for $10, in one of their seasonal bins. They are the “Gold Ribbon” brand, only came in 2 sizes – S/M and L/XL. I bought the L/XL and they fit perfectly – for reference, I’m 5’4 and a size 6 or a Small in most clothing.

  12. Thankx for this lovely post. Actually it is witnissed many a times that working women wears a professional yet designer suits. According to my view these suits complement their style and also the mood of office environment. It gives a feel of technocrat while wearing it.

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