Salary or Title: Which is More Important?

Up! originally uploaded to Flickr by Peter πWhich is more important — your salary or your title? Reader D wonders…

I would love to see a post on the relative merits of pursing a higher title or more compensation. Would readers be willing to be paid less (or the same amount) for a title bump? Or, would they demand that any title bump come with an increase in pay? Is title more important than money? Or, is money more important than title?

Interesting question. My first reaction was “money — duh” but I suppose there are situations where a title would be more important than money. We’ve talked before about how job hopping isn’t the best idea, but in some professions (for example, magazines), historically, the way to get through all the bottom-rung positions (editorial assistant, assistant editor, junior editor, etc.) was to change jobs as frequently as possible. The salary bumps were miniscule, and the job title was, generally, ceremonial — a junior editor still had to sort reader mail as much as an editorial assistant — but they helped you advance to the real editing much more quickly. So I suppose, in today’s environment — where more and more industries are taking the Hollywood “Harvard grads start in the mailroom” approach to hiring, and where people often take internship after internship because real jobs are scarce — well, maybe I would take the title over the money. (Pictured: Up! originally uploaded to Flickr by Peter π.)

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Love, Marriage, and Pre-Nups

Reader C has a great question about how to deal with her fiance, who wants her to sign a pre-nuptial agreement…

After 7 years of dating (since my junior year of college) and one year of being engaged, my fiance just brought them up. Both of us have advanced degrees but he’s in finance and I work in public interest law. I am significantly less financially secure than him and will make significantly less in my career. But we’ve always functioned like a team. We’ve both made moves and career decisions for each other. He’s my best friend. But I’m really hurt. Our wedding is only a month and a half out and this feels very rushed to me. We both have said we would never get divorced (and after 8 happy years together, I truly believe we’ll make it), but his phrasing is that “he analyzes risk for a living and he just wants to be extra secure that in the unlikely event of divorce, he is prepared.” I think that even having a pre-nupt opens the door to divorce and don’t understand why if he says he doesn’t believe in divorce that he’d request one. This feels like the biggest breach in our relationship ever. Advice? Am I being ridiculous? Is he? How many corporette readers have pre-nupts (statistics I found said 5-10% of marriages but that includes second marriages and marriages with children from previous marriages where I think it makes more sense)? Can anyone help me get on board with this or am I right to be freaking out (after all, a pre-nupt can only hurt me)?

Interesting question.  I’ve seen articles that say pre-nups are on the rise (even though the oft-quoted statistic that 50% of couples divorce isn’t really true).  Personally, I come to pre-nups from the other side of things: even though I’m wildly in love, as well as Catholic and of the “divorce is not an option” mindset, I’m the one who brought them up with my husband, R. I broached the subject with this little speech:  Good Kat and Good R are marrying now, and we love each other and of course would want to take care of each other (or at least be fair to each other) even if something were to happen and if we were to divorce.  But — if we actually WERE to divorce, that would be a sea change (because we love each other so much right now and can’t possibly imagine it!!) and, in that event, we’d probably be dealing with either Bad Kat or Bad R or both.  And my point was that if we really loved each other now, wouldn’t it be a nice thing if Good Kat and Good R had agreed to the terms of the divorce — and not Bad Kat or Bad R, who probably would have hurt feelings and maybe a bit of blood thirst. Furthermore, even though the pre-nup terms we discussed were very close to New York state law, something else I liked was that if the law changed, or if we moved to a new state, we wouldn’t have to deal with new information — the terms of the divorce would always be a known quantity.

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When Friends Compete for Jobs…

Gold, Silver, Bronze, originally uploaded to Flickr by TofflerAnn.Reader L wonders how to stay friendly with people who compete for the same jobs she is…

I am about to graduate from graduate school in a professional field. My friends and I are all searching for similar jobs. How can we deal with the competitive nature of the job hunt, specifically in our field, without letting it get in the way of our relationships? I feel pangs of jealousy when a friend gets an interview for a job I applied for (a highly immature reaction, I know) and I’m sure I’m not the only one of the group to feel this way. I try to avoid discussing the job hunt, but it seems to come up in conversation regardless. Help!

We got into this a bit back when another reader asked about being competitive with her significant other, but I don’t think we’ve talked about it in the abstract.  So let’s discuss.  (Pictured: Gold, Silver, Bronze, originally uploaded to Flickr by TofflerAnn.)

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How to Interview with Friends

Handshake, originally uploaded to Flickr by SvadilfariReader J wonders how she can turn a temporary job into a permanent job, but is nervous because she already knows the interviewers…

After being laid off from an in-house counsel position several months ago, I obtained a part-time, temporary position in the same industry. After being here a couple months, the company opened up a permanent, full-time Associate General Counsel position. The job description is broader than what I am doing as my temp assignment, but I believe I am well-qualified. I also really like the company and my co-workers. I submitted my resume, and HR just contacted me to schedule interviews for next week.

What makes this situation unusual is that my interviewers will be the GC and others with whom I already interact on a daily basis. I think I interview pretty well; I have been offered nearly every job I have interviewed for since graduating from law school. But I am very nervous about this temp-to-perm scenario.

Congratulations on making it through to the first round of interviews! We’ve talked about how to change jobs within companies before, but we haven’t really talked about how to interview with your current colleagues and coworkers.  To be honest, I’m not quite sure I understand your nervousness — this sounds like a great situation from all angles. From my perspective: your interviewers know you and your work product, you already know a bit about them and how to play the interview, it should be easy to figure out what the interviewer is “really” asking, and you probably have a better understanding of the new job and its demands. When I interviewed for my last legal job (at the non-profit), I already knew my future boss, having interned at the non-profit during law school and having kept in touch with her through the years.  I viewed that as a positive thing because I knew what to expect on the interview.  Don’t get me wrong, I did my homework, just like I would have for any job interview: I scoured the non-profit’s website, I read up on the particular area of the law that they wanted the new position to focus on (I read an entire treatise the nonprofit had put out on the subject, actually), I went through recent newsletters and publications to find other new cases and issues to discuss at the interview, and I did my best to figure out what was “missing” or what I could add.  (And yes, I wore a suit, even though I knew it was a business casual office.) I always advise anyone going on a job interview to focus on what you bring to the job, but here that “let me help you” vibe was magnified because I was excited to show my potential boss how I could make an impact in the job, how my background would be perfect for the position, and how my approach to the job would be the right one.  I also went into the interview with the theory that if she didn’t like my approach, or if she found another candidate who was better qualified — well, so be it — and I like to think that we would have stayed friendly even if I hadn’t gotten the job.

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The Professional Implications of a “Naturally Frowny Face”

A recent SNL episode featured a fictional campaign advertisement for a mayoral candidate.  The character, Glenda Okones (played by Kristen Wiig),  listed her flaws, including her reputation for being harsh and cold.  “Here’s why,” she said:  “I just have a naturally frowny face. Not ugly, but certainly severe looking.”

Ah, perfect, I thought: an opportunity to talk about bitchface.

I’ll admit: the main reason we haven’t talked about it before is because I didn’t want to use bad words in the headline of the post!  But I think this is something that can affect a professional woman’s career, and something we should talk about.

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When You’re Held Back Because You’re Too Good

Held back, originaly uploaded to Flickr by Matthew Wilkinson.Have you ever been denied a promotion because you were too good at your current job?  Reader N suspects this may be what’s at play at her workplace, and wonders what she can do about it.

I just read your article “Getting the Work You Want” and I wanted to ask a follow up question. I’ve found myself in a position of getting passed over for moving into a complex litigation team, despite having openly expressed my interest, and my superior agreeing that I would be better used in that area. (I’ve had this reinforced by rave reviews for my senior attorneys and from fellow co-workers who I’ve helped out.)

From what I can tell, it seems that my superiors (and theirs) place more value in the fact that I can manage my workload and simultaneously back up three to four people at a time. I’ve backed up coworkers in the complex team, too, but as for moving up with them permanently… nothing.

So what’s a girl to do when I have spoken up and asked… and nothing happens? Have I shot myself in the foot by having quality and quantity? Should I just take the rave reviews and recommendations and look for work elsewhere?

Fabulous question. There are a million reasons why people don’t get jobs and promotions — including not being right for them.  That said, something I’ve seen happen is when a boss keeps a “good worker” in the trenches because his or her own life is made so much easier by the worker.  The boss knows the job will get done, and done well. He or she doesn’t have to hire or train anyone new.  It’s great!  For the boss, that is.  For the worker (which may be Reader N, here) you don’t grow at all.  For a particularly selfish boss, he or she may also try to restrain you from working with other people, give you lackluster reviews or recommendations to keep you with them, and maybe even talk down to you to make you question whether or not you “deserve” better than your current job.  (Pictured: Held back, originaly uploaded to Flickr by Matthew Wilkinson.) [Read more...]