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OMG, LOL!!! How to Convey Tone In Email Without Seeming Childish

02/14/2013 By 111 Comments

How do you convey tone in email without seeming childish or girlish?  Can you ever use exclamations in emails?  Reader C wonders…

I’m hoping you can address the issue of using !’s in emails at work. As we all know, tone is hard to convey properly via email. However, whenever I am inclined to use an ! to convey a positive tone, I get the sense that it actually reads as childish or immature. I also never seem to notice men using !’s in emails, either…. I’d love to hear yours and others thoughts on this!

Outstanding question, and I can’t wait to hear what readers say.  A lot has been written about overuse of exclamations in emails — with some people even suggesting that one exclamation mark per email is a good rule to follow.  There’s even an app to help you check the tone of your email!  My best general advice is that abbreviations, multiple punctuation marks (!!!), and overly casual phrases (“amazeballs!”) have no place in professional emails.   Beyond that, I think a lot of this depends on why you want to use a positive tone.  For example: [Read more...]

Filed Under: Being Girly, Business Etiquette, CoWorker Problems, Professionalism, Social Media, Tech, Work Styles

How to Secretly Use LinkedIn to Change Careers

09/27/2012 By 72 Comments

Secret, originally uploaded to Flickr by val.pearl.How do you use LinkedIn to get a new job — without alerting your coworkers or boss that you’ve got one foot out the door? Reader B has a GREAT question:

I am nearly six years into my first job, which is in commercial insurance. I want to transition out of this industry and thought augmenting my LinkedIn profile would be helpful (to show up in search results, connect to new contacts, etc.). HOWEVER, my entire work history and a good proportion of my contacts skew insurance. Since my current co-workers can view my profile (through second and tertiary contacts – I am not directly linked to any of them at present), I don’t want to raise any red flags at my office. Any suggestions?

Excellent question! I’ll be 100% honest here: whenever I get a little LinkedIn activity notification that someone has updated their experience, I wonder whether they’re starting to look around for a new job. I suppose it’s a bit like wearing a suit — if you never, ever wear a suit to the office and then one day, you do, everyone starts to wonder whether you’ve had an interview that day. But if you’re savvy about your LinkedIn usage, though, you can get around that. (Pictured: Secret, originally uploaded to Flickr by val.pearl.)

I think there are two phases to using LinkedIn to change careers. The first phase is the research phase, when you want to discreetly look at other people’s profiles, see what connections you might have, and join a lot of new groups in your target industry to get an idea for the conversations happening within the industry. [Read more...]

Filed Under: Career, Interviewing, Networking, Social Media, Transitions

How To Use LinkedIn

03/21/2011 By 58 Comments

how-to-use-linked-inWhat is the proper way to use LinkedIn if you’re a junior employee? Has it changed through the past few years?

This came up recently when I linked to a 2008 Corporette post about how to leave an internship — there, I advised interns:

It’s fine to use Facebook or MySpace to connect with the other students you summered with. If you want to, it’s not inappropriate to use LinkedIn to connect, either. However, do not request to become “LinkedIn” with superiors at the company, unless you’d also ask them to recommend you to a future employer — it’s more serious than a casual link, and no one has really had time to assess the other person’s work. Requesting to become linked to an mid-level or senior person you had lunch once or twice with, or wrote a memo for, is really not acceptable.

Do I still agree with this advice? Yes and no. I will say that how I use LinkedIn has changed over the years. In 2008, I remember approving a request from a casual friend I’d known in college. We were never close, I’d never worked with her on a school project, and I hadn’t seen her or talked to her in nearly 10 years. What, I worried, did our connection mean? If she had turned into a poor worker, would that reflect on me? And so from that point on I chose not to approve anyone unless I could vouch for their work.  (Pictured:  Connections, originally uploaded to Flickr by carlaarena.)

[Read more...]

Tagged With: , , Filed Under: Business Etiquette, Career, Internships/Summer Jobs, Just Starting Out, Mid-20s, Networking, Professionalism, Social Media, Tech, Transitions

Tool of the Trade: Facebook’s Privacy Settings

07/20/2009 By 17 Comments

Picture 20Facebook continues to grow in popularity, and it’s now entirely possible that your coworkers, bosses, former teachers–as well as your real friends–will see everything you post on there. Or at least they will if your privacy settings aren’t set just so. By setting things up properly, though, you can prevent everyone but a handful of people from seeing:

  • pictures that other people tag of you (because your friends may not have the same aversion to posting drunken pictures of you as you might),
  • status updates (because maybe you don’t want that guy you only vaguely remember from high school commenting when you post a sarcastic status update about being excited for another long day at the office)
  • your phone number, IM screen name, etc.

and more. (It seems to be easier to set up a “yes” group rather than setting up a “no” group — this way you don’t have to remember to add people to the “no” group as time goes on. Furthermore, if you’re like us, Facebook has become a bit like a high school reunion and office cooler party all at once, and while your number of “Facebook friends” has grown to stratospheric levels, the number of real friends has remained somewhat, well, small.)

Because this can be a bit confusing, we thought we’d post a primer on how to set your privacy settings… after the jump.

[Read more...]

Tagged With: , Filed Under: Business Etiquette, Fashion, Lifestyle, Social Media, Tool of the Trade

Emergency Mailbag: Should she “Friend” her boss on Facebook?

02/05/2009 By 44 Comments

We just got this request in from a reader, and we thought we’d post it for the group to weigh in:

new problem:
an 8th year i.e. someone very much the boss of me (isn’t everyone?) just found me on facebook and wants to be added. i took a look at his profile and he’s friends with most of the senior associates and about half of the partners in our group. we are friendly and he’s a nice guy, but we are not actually friends.

i don’t know what to do. i like to keep facebook for just friends, so i don’t even add people that i am acquainted with, or people i used to know (like people from high school that i haven’t seen in years). but i don’t think that rejecting the invitation is a good idea considering that i am supposed to be trying to integrate myself into the group. and wouldn’t limited profile be obvious, like what am i trying to hide?

is this the end of my facebook? there’s nothing bad on there, but it is my personal space.

help!

Eeesh. We hate these decisions. We would probably accept him as a friend, but then our Facebook friends list has become overrun by former classmates from our Midwestern hometown who just discovered Facebook. (And boy, do they love to update their status.) In other words, we’re not really too picky about it — unlike LinkedIn, where we only link with people we could happily recommend to someone else. On the other hand, you could ignore him — if he asks about it later you could lie and say oh, I haven’t checked that e-mail account in ages, or “Oh, you know I saw that and then totally forgot about it” and let it go. We’d probably do the latter if we had an active dislike for this guy.

Readers, weigh in: what would you do? (Also, if anyone is so inclined, become a fan of Corporette on Facebook!)

Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , Filed Under: Business Etiquette, Career, CoWorker Problems, Networking, Social Media

10 Things: About the Art Of Saying Goodbye*

07/31/2008 By 16 Comments

how-to-end-internship-on-great-terms*The Pat Benatar song is actually “About the Art of Letting Go,” not saying good bye, but so it goes.

As the summer dwindles for summer classes of future MBAs and JDs, we thought we’d give some advice on how to say goodbye (and hello).

While you’re still working there…

1. Give people a head’s up that your last day is approaching — do your best to set up lunch, coffee, whatever. Until you’ve accepted your offer there is still very much an air of “let’s make the summers happy,” so now would be a good time to approach that Big Wig and see if you can set something up. (Hint: If you’re trying to organize something with the CEO or Executive Partner you may want to try to get a few other summers on board — it’ll be less awkward for you and it’ll be seen as more time-efficient for the Big Wig.)

2. Assess if you’d like to offer any of your time during your final year in school – law firms in particular have been known to quietly use 3Ls if there is too much work. If you’d like to commit your time during your last full year of freedom, offer it up during lunch or coffee.

3. Make sure people in your summer class are organizing a thank-you present for your secretaries, as well as the recruiting office — flowers are nice, spa packages are better. If no one is, spearhead the effort yourself. If you had a very active summer, follow up with a hand-written thank-you note to the recruiting office. Why? It’s the gracious thing to do. (And no one likes working with an ingrate.)

4. On your last day, try to do a personal drop-by to say goodbye to the people you enjoyed working with the most. If anything comes up in the conversation, be sure to follow up on it. Exchange e-mail addresses if possible — if there was a mid-level at the company you especially liked you may want to make sure you get his or her personal e-mail address, on the off chance they leave before you return.

5. Be judicious about social networking sites. It’s fine to use Facebook or MySpace to connect with the other students you summered with. If you want to, it’s not inappropriate to use LinkedIn to connect, either. However, do not request to become “Linked In” with superiors at the company, unless you’d also ask them to recommend you to a future employer — it’s more serious than a casual link, and no one has really had time to assess the other person’s work. (See our updated LinkedIn tips here.) Requesting to become linked to an mid-level or senior person you had lunch once or twice with, or wrote a memo for, is really not acceptable. Similarly, be wise about your Facebook or MySpace page — if you’re going to connect with future work associates, take your cue from them. If they don’t have drunken bikini shots of themselves on there, you might want to think twice before putting those on your own page. (Although, really, we’re hoping you removed those pictures before you started the interview process.)

During the long absence…

6. Stay in touch with people you liked! Ask for advice, give them a general update on your life if you got to personally know someone well. This can pay off professionally: if you worked at a law firm this summer and got to know a first- or second-year associate very well, by the time you get back they’ll be a mid-level associate with (hopefully) good work to pass along.

7. Use Google Alerts to stay “up” on projects you worked on during the summer. Did the deal ever happen? Did the case ever settle? Did the product ever launch? Send an e-mail when you see an article on point to the bosses who supervised you. Also use the service to stay up on other company news and gossip. This way, if the firm wins a huge judgment, or the company posts huge profits you can congratulate the people you knew at the company (as well as being aware if layoffs happen or the stock price plummets). Finally, you may also want to use Google Alerts for any newsmakers in your firm — it never hurts to e-mail the BigWig and say, “Ah, saw your op-ed in last week’s WSJ. I learned a lot, and thought you’d be interested to read ____ as well.”

8. Don’t speak ill of your experience around campus. Remember, this is the company you’ll be working for; it will appear on your resume — you don’t want to contribute to a bad opinion of it, if one exists (and you certainly don’t want to create one).

As you prepare to come back for the start of work…

9. Send a personal e-mail to the people you worked with to let them know you’re coming back – even if everyone in your class is starting on the same date. The onus of getting back in touch falls to the person with the least seniority — which is you. Let them know you’ll be coming back soon; depending on the person you’re e-mailing you may want to ask if they have any good projects if they can hold them for your start date, or you may want to ask if there are any projects at the company you should avoid like the plague.

10. Whatever you do, during every part of this process, avoid e-mailing everyone at the company or law firm. You may have seen people who had worked at the company for years send around a mass e-mail saying good bye — THIS IS NOT YOU. DO NOT DO THIS. All you will do is make yourself seem self-important and lacking in discrimination.

Liked this story? You may also want to check out our Corporette 101 features (advice for women just starting out in the business world), The Hunt (where we review some options in the market for basics), our What to Wear To… advice, or maybe check out some of our polls. Oh, or also our 10 Things columns…

Pictured at top:  How do you say goodbye with a picture, originally uploaded to Flickr by 23am.com.

Filed Under: 10 Things, Business Etiquette, Career, Features, Internships/Summer Jobs, Job Hunting, Networking, School, Social Media, Top Post, Transitions