Coffee Break: Morandi Large Satchel

Pour La Victoire Morandi Large Satchel6pm.com has started some early sales for the Fourth of July (although the big $17.76 sale starts on Thursday), including marking down a bunch of Cole Haan, Pour La Victoire, Ellington, Franco Sarto, and other bags. For today’s Coffee Break I’m liking this pretty satchel from Pour La Victoire. It comes in a bunch of colors, and looks like a great North/South bag to carry papers, magazines and more to and from work. The price is pretty great too — was $475, now marked 60% off to $170-$190. Pour La Victoire Morandi Large Satchel

(L-all)

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Comments

  1. Really random question. Is it better as far as energy and water wasting to run one big load of laundry or two smaller loads? Our washer is a new one where we don’t actually pick the water level; I guess it figures that out on its own. So that makes me think water usage is neutral either way. But is that true? And what about the energy usage?

    By the way, does anyone else drive themselves crazy with questions like this??? I seriously do. Should I buy the rice in the hard plastic container that is recyclable or in the thinner plastic bag that is not recyclable but is less waste in the first place? Is the cotton ball or the cotton pad worse? I could go on and on.

    • I feel like one big load is more energy efficient – ie a load that is twice the size uses more water and electricity but not 2x as much. I don’t know if that’s true or not but makes sense to me. Efficiency of scale and whatnot.
      I consider these questions in terms of getting my money’s worth more so than waste output.

    • Also in Academia :

      I don’t know about the washer, but every time I try to be really “efficient” and put a big load of clothes in the dryer, they don’t get dry, and I just have to run the dryer again. So, I feel that smaller loads is actually more efficient in terms of total time the dryer is running.

      • Mine comes out 95% dry, maybe some heavier items like jeans I hang for a little bit to finish. But my dryer is pretty new.

      • I agree; don’t stuff the dryer too full. And in any event, clean the lint filter and make sure the exhaust pipe is not blocked.

      • Air drying. Hang them on an airer or outside on the clothesline to dry.
        You don’t need me to give you the stats on those beasts but just don’t do it.
        I don’t have one at all and manage perfectly well.

    • For big loads in the dryer, I stop it halfway through and remove any items that are already dry. That seems to help.

    • Buy re-usable cotton rounds from Etsy. Search cotton rounds. They are terry on one side with some batting in the middle so they are absorbent. You can wash them in the machine, and they won’t add more bulk than a pair of undies to the wash load.

  2. Wow, great find – Love the color on the side, nice detail!

    zipstyleseattle.com

  3. This looks like a purse version of the redweld. Like something you’d find on thinkgeek.

  4. AnonInfinity :

    I’m going to the beach soon! Does anyone have one of those big, floppy hats they love? I believe they’re usually made of straw. Do I need a neck strap? So many decisions for such a simple thing…

    • Diana Barry :

      For sun protection?

      I love my Tilley Airflo hat. All of the Tilley hats are great. Link to follow

      http://www.tilley.com/LTM6-AIRFLO-Nylamtium-Hat.aspx

      • omigosh with the T T E curse!

        I like the San Diego Hat Co. hats. They are usually on sale at Whole Foods and fair trade stores. But I’ve also picked up big floppy hats at Marshalls/Ross. As long as the band fits snugly on my head, I haven’t needed a chin strap.

        Thanks for the reminder to pack my hats when I head to VA in two weeks, tho, I might have forgo t t e n!! ;o)

        • Second this. I wear one on the walk part of my commute. Shocking how may compliments I get on it – from men, mostly.

    • I like the San Diego Hat Co. hats. They are usually on sale at Whole Foods and fair trade stores. But I’ve also picked up big floppy hats at Marshalls/Ross. As long as the band fits snugly on my head, I haven’t needed a chin strap.

      Thanks for the reminder to pack my hats when I head to VA in two weeks, tho, I might have forgotten!! ;o)

    • I wear one of those straw cowboy type hats. No string. I think it’s Joe Boxer from Kmart, under $10.

      • Very similar to this: http://www.kmart.com/joe-boxer-women-s-straw-cowboy-hat/p-030W005505732001P?prdNo=20&blockNo=20&blockType=G20

  5. Anyone had experience with tear duct plugs? I stupidly let my eye dr. put them in without asking questions or researching first. And now one side has slipped in… Lesson learned on how to advocate for my own health. I feel like an idiot and am hoping this doesn’t end up being serious.

  6. SoCal Gator :

    My son who took the LSAT in June just found out that scores will be posed today. We are all on pins and needles.

    • SoCal Gator :

      **posted*** Sorry for the typo

    • SoCal Gator :

      He got a 169 and is disappointed. To me, that seems like a really good score — 97th percentile. What do you think? When I took the LSAT eons ago the scoring was completley different.

      • goldribbons :

        That’s a fantastic score unless he was planning to get a full ride to a top-5 school. It’s fantastic. Also, it’s getting easier to get into law school these days because there are ZERO jobs for lawyers.

      • That is great!

        But if he is gunning for $ or T14 with median GPA and knows he can do better (b/c he was doing better on practice tests, got really tired during section 5 or just didn’t have much time to study), retaking to bump it up a few points may be worth it. (I did, and it was worth retaking for my situation as I didn’t have time to study the first time I took it and underestimated the exhaustion).

        • Agree. It’s competitive for T14 (especially since applications are down now) as long as his GPA is in the right range. If he needed a great LSAT to pull up a mediocre GPA, or if he’s going for Harvard et al., it might be worth re-taking to see if he can break 170.

      • That is a fantastic score. End of discussion.

      • SoCal Gator :

        He had plenty of time to study, was rested and completed the test with time to go over his answers. He took a full colleg lsat prep course and worked closely with the professor. He does want to go to a T14 but I thin apart from Stanford, his #1 hope was for Boalt or UCLA. I think this plus his 3.87 GPA gives him a good shot at getting in to both. But, of course, I’m his mom and biased. His best practice test score was 170 — the rest were 166-168. It’s 97% so to me, that seems pretty good even for T14.

        • I think he’s probably good for Boalt or UCLA with that score plus his GPA. Stanford isn’t out of reach, either. Sounds like he’s doing well!

        • He should be in a great position based on his numbers. You can go to lsac [dot] org and search law schools by GPA and LSAT score. The site will give you a rough idea of your son’s chances of getting in.

        • SoCal Gator :

          Thanks everyone for the feedback. It’s hard when it’s your son — you have no objectivity. Even though we should not have been surprised that he wants to go to law school since my husband and I are both lawyers, we both were a bit startled by his decision since he always said growing up that he never wanted to be a lawyer. I talked long and hard with my son about the many reasons not to go to law school these days given the expense and job prospects but he is determined so we are supporting him in this. He has a passion for law that he discovered taking a number of undergraduate classes on Law and Politics, Constitutional Law. My belief is that if it is a passion, he will find a way to succeed and flourish – I have always told him to follow his heart in pursuing a career in something he loves. I am so proud of him and hope he does get into the law school of his choice. He wants to practice in California so UCLA, Boalt, Stanford, maybe even UC Irvine are all good choices.

          Thanks for the moral support!

          • Anonymous :

            Make sure he can afford it through either your financial support, a substantial scholarship, or a combination thereof. Otherwise, the only things that will be flourishing will be his law school debt and the misery that goes along with that.

            I apologize for my relatively harsh tone, but the gravity of the financial part of the decision has been significantly underestimated by the law students of a few decades ago, at least in my recent experience. It’s not enough to get in — you have to pay for it too.

          • Anonymous :

            I’ll go against the grain and encourage him to retake in October. With his GPA, a few more points on the LSAT could lead lead to 100% tuition scholarships at T14 law schools. There is no downside to retaking, other than the effort — but the effort now could substantially decrease his debt coming out of school. Less debt means more options for the type of work he wants to do and can also take pressure off a bit on grades (if you don’t need a BigLaw job to afford to pay your debt, then missing that grade cut off doesn’t have the same consequences).

            It sounds like your son knows all of this, which is why he is bummed about the score. In your shoes, I would probably affirm that in the big picture he got a great score, but let him know that if this score doesn’t open up all the opportunities he wants, you support and encourage him to give it another go in October.

      • HappyHoya :

        I know JK declared “end of discussion,” but I’ll second that it’s a great score. I do some admissions consulting and he’s in a range where he is very competitive. Admissions selectivity is easing quite a bit, as schools need to fill seats but applications are way, way down.

      • Anonymous :

        My friend and I both had that score (in different years) and we both graduated from Harvard Law. If I were him, I would not take it again. I had another friend re-take the LSAT and get a lower score.

        • Anonymous :

          I’m guessing this was awhile ago. Lower scores don’t matter anymore. Ever since USNWR decided to only the highest LSAT score, law schools stopped averaging. A 169 is not competitive score for Harvard — it is below their 25th percentile. If Harvard is the goal, retaking is a more likely path. There is still a good deal of room left for improvement on a 169 — with little to no downside, and potentially tens of thousands of dollars in scholarship money on the line, I would retake.

          • anon for this :

            Depends on what you consider to be “a while ago” but I’m a fairly recent NYU grad, and I was admitted with a 169. It was 25th percentile at the time, but, you know, someone’s in the 25th percentile every year. I think what else is on the resume matters a lot – I graduated summa cum laude from a top-20 college, with a near-perfect GPA. And I had some interesting life experiences. I figure that’s what helped me.

            Also, for what it’s worth, I outperformed most of my class once admitted by all objective measures, so being admitted with a 25th percentile LSAT doesn’t mean you’ll be in the bottom of the class come graduation day.

    • Have your son look at lawschoolnumbers.com, but with that score, he’d easily be in to UCLA with $$ and Boalt would be highly likely as well.

      • layered bob :

        I second lawschoolnumbers.com and top-law-schools.com. Also have him examine the reports at Law School Transparency for the schools he’s interested and markets he wants to work in. That will give him a good idea of where he’ll be competitive and where he could get a job.

        I will say, I had a 169 and similar GPA. I will be attending a T-14 in the fall with a substantial scholarship, so admissions are definitely less competitive than in the mid-2000s. But the best I did this admissions cycle was a waitlist at a T-6. That’s with several years’ relevant work experience, several journal publications, and unusual “softs.” So depending on his “softs” he may be more or less competitive, but Stanford is probably still a reach.

  7. Food threadjack, because I’m bored and trapped here for probably another 3hrs…

    If you had a Star Trek replicator that could rearrange the atoms into whatever food you wanted, but could only pre-program it to contain 3 cuisines, which 3 cuisines would they be (categories can be broad)?

    1. South Asian (I am greedy- this is my catchall for regional Indian cuisines, Pakistani cuisine, Bangladeshi cuisine, Sri Lankan, etc.)

    2. Vietnamese cuisine

    3. Northern Italian cuisine

    • Ooh fun! This is hard to narrow down, but I would say:

      1. Thai
      2. New Mexican
      3. Greek

    • HappyHoya :

      1. South Asian (good idea!)
      2. Latin American (also a yummy catchall- perhaps too broad?)
      3. Meso-American

    • Indian, Mexican, and Mediterranean. Japanese almost slid into the #3 spot but as much as I love it I think I would get tired of that the soonest.

    • 1. Northern Italian (can’t deny my roots!)

      2. Thai

      3. Middle Eastern

    • Clarifying question:

      How does this thing handle desserts? Because I could try to narrow my entree choices down to three, but I. Must. Have. things like icecream, cookies, cake, brownies, etc.

      • Hello gelato!

      • Maybe designate “American” as the catchall?

        I had to have South Asian, because I do love a nice mango lassi and kaju pista(cchio) rolls.

        • What if one of my three is just like “Pastry Chef” or something??

          • Hmm.. We’ll ask Starfleet to add “Pastry Chef” as one of the available modules. :-)

          • Yay, thanks!! I’ll gladly only have two main cuisine choices if I can have desserts ;o)
            Okay, now that my Parliamentary Inquiry has been addressed:

            1. Mediterranean/Middle Eastern
            2. Southeast Asian (Thai, Vietnamese, etc)
            3. Pastry Chef

            (great game!!)

          • +1 for cuisine choices and excellent use of Parliamentary Inquiry

          • Thanks, crunchy! I spent way too many hours watching the Texas State Senate filibuster live stream ;o)

    • This is tough.

      1. Indian (easy #1)
      2. Thai (easy #2)
      3. So freaking hard!!!! Probably Mexican? Or Italian? Or Mediterranean? Or American comfort food. Aaaahh, comfort food. The mac and cheese wins.

    • SoCalAtty :

      1. Italian

      2. Greek

      3. Japanese

      I’m not sure that “Californian” is a choice, but that almost went up for 3rd!

    • Ahhhh, I live in nowheresville these days so my only “ethnic” options are chinese and mexican and now I am so hungry for home where these were all options!

      I would have to go with Mediteranean, South Asian, and I think, French.

    • 1. Korean
      2. Italian
      3. Southeast Asian (catchall for Thai, Vietnamese, Malaysian, Indonesian, etc.)

      So hungry.

    • 1. Korean
      2. So long as it includes New Mexico-style mexican, American.
      3. Traditional Mexican.

    • Fun!

      1) Japanese
      2) Vietnamese / Southeast Asian if I can stretch it that far
      3) Californian (SoCalAtty, it’s totally a cuisine). If Californian isn’t a cuisine, then, Italian.

    • Mary Ann Singleton :

      Oooohh…

      1. Mediterranean/North African (hello Baba Ganoush)
      2. Italian
      3. Japanese

      I’d be good with those. Forever.

    • Coach Laura :

      1. Gluten Free
      2. Gluten Free
      3. Gluten Free

      Seriously, I want a replicator to make all my food, any where, any time gluten free. Eating gluten-free not by choice (celiac) makes me grumpy. Yes, it’s 1000 times easier than it was even 5 years ago but I’d kill for a slice of authentic Italian pizza, authentic croissants, authentic NY Bagel and lox, real naan, etc., etc. The gluten free substitutes are just that – second best. A replicator would be a miracle. That being said, here are mine:

      1. Gluten Free Italian/Sicilian
      2. Gluten Free South Asian/Indian
      3. Gluten Free Mediteranean/Middle Eastern

  8. HappyHoya :

    Off Topic: I recently went to a new dentist in a new state for the first time. I was a little overdue for my cleaning, but not by much. He suggested major work, claiming I had all sorts of cavities and rotting that my old dentist (who was a family friend, very competent, and I trust completely) never mentioned. I was not aware anything was wrong with my teeth and I was very surprised. I have dental insurance which will cover a lot of it, and I am not concerned about the cost, but I am very concerned about unnecessary drilling and filling. I know several people who’ve really had their mouths messed up with unnecessary dental work. I am having a hard time getting accurate information about this. I don’t want to be overly skeptical, and I would like to keep my teeth, but I can’t help but think I need to be a smart consumer about this. FWIW, there were several Yelp reviews of this dentist claiming he did too much work or oversold them, but that was the case with all the dentists that had any substantial number of reviews.

    • HappyHoya :

      I should add: I am open to getting a second opinion, and have looked into that option. My reluctance to do that is that every dentist I could get an appointment with had complaints against them for doing too much work. I would have to pay out of pocket for multiple exams, and I don’t think it would resolve the issue. I am not sure clients are being unreasonable with these complains or if all dentist are lousy. I am hoping I can get some opinions of smart ladies (maybe even dentists themselves) here.

      Thanks!

      • Second opinion and I’d be upfront with Second Opinion Dentist about why you’re there. It’ll put him/her on the alert that you’re aware that some dentists try to snow you with unnecessary “services” and implicitly warn him/her not to try the same crap with you.

        I went to one dentist for a cleaning, and he tried to suggest all these unnecessary things, including Invisalign (when I’d had braces many years ago), and I just told him straight out that I thought they were unnecessary and that he was trying to upsell me and that I’d never come back.

        My current dentist I found through my dental insurance provider’s website and I called up and let them know that I wanted a “second opinion.” She was fantastic– she and her team do great work, and have never tried to upsell me on stuff. Had she not been fantastic, I think I’d have given her the Stasi-type interrogation over every single filling and demanding to know exactly why it was necessary without agreeing to do any of them.

        • Just because you had braces doesn’t mean he was trying to snow you on Invisalign. Unless you’ve been wearing retainers religiously since then, you’re teeth will likely have shifted. And many things, such as bite that is off, aren’t glaringly obvious. (I only mention as I, too, wore braces and my bite–and a lot of ear pain associated with being off–improved tremendously after treatment. My teeth also needed a great deal of straightening, however. The lower teeth in particular had all started to crowd over time.)

          Do some dentists upsell and perform more work than needed? Absolutely. I would assume there are bad apples in any group. But just because they recommend treatments that others haven’t in the past doesn’t necessarily make them a fraud.

          Get a second opinion.

      • Get thee a second opinion. One NYC dentist I went to while seeking a new east coast dentist told me I had 4 cavities and that he’d fill them for $350 each.

        Um… I had no teeth pain so that was surprising.

        I was going to my hometown anyway, so I saw my dentist from age 9 through age 24 and he didn’t see any need other than one deep “groove” but based on his experience being my dentist he said I’d be fine.

        $75 or so for out of pocket 2nd opinion > $1200 in unnecessary fillings.

        The NYC dentist was well-known for their cosmetic dentistry but I sure didn’t want to pay for their fancy office via unnecessary procedures.

        • After reading this, I will never ever complain about my dentist fees in Morocco.
          $350 will get me a new tooth not just fix a cavity!

    • goldribbons :

      . . . sounds like you need to get a second opinion, and probably not from strangers over the internet. Good job being a smart consumer.

    • Anonymous :

      Curious to hear others’ thoughts here. I’m delaying doing some dental work that seemed to spring from nowhere. . . “a couple spots to watch” last summer became 6 cavities to be filled by Feb. I’m trying an alternative. . . read up on Dr. Ellie and xylitol.

      • Anonymous :

        Edited to add: I would bet that dentists only make money on “drill n’ fill”. It doesn’t seem like anyone can make money in alt-dentistry. I feel quite cynical about dentists, clearly.

    • call your old dentist and get his opinion? see if he knows anyone he can recommend in the area?

      • HappyHoya :

        He doesn’t know anyone in the area. I’ve moved across the country since I’ve seen him last. I suppose I could call his office and they might be able to give me some pointers on how to find a good dentist. I probably could have boiled my post down to that question. I am not looking for dental advice on the internet, but I am curious how women here find dentist and how much you would look around before trusting them to do something drastic with your teeth. I’ve looked on numerous “review” sites, some general and some for doctors and dentists, and there is never enough information to really get a sense of what’s going on.

        • Is there a local dental school to either get a recommendation or second opinion from?

    • Anonymous :

      Get a second opinion. I had a new dentist tell me I needed 7 fillings. I went to another one who said my teeth were fine. Six years later and still no cavities.

    • Famouscait :

      My sister had a similar experience after her first visit with a new dentist after leaving home and our next-door-neighbor-cum-dentist. She was recommended to get skin grafts on her gums. new crowns and caps, etc. Needless to say, she got a second opinion and did not end up A) performing 95% of the work or B) returning to the dentist who recommended it all.

      As my mom told her, “Someone’s child is off to college/getting married/or needs a kitchen remodel.”

    • I had this happen when I went to a new dentist in a new town, and it was extra shocking to hear how “bad” my teeth were as I had never had even one cavity in my life. Turns out it was a scam. I highly recommend a second opinion. My scam dentist used a “Diagnodont” which is a laser which bounces off your teeth. When I went to a reputable dentist for my second opinion (and I didn’t tell him the story about the scammer) he found nothing. I asked him then if the Diagnodont can give “false positives” for cavities and then told him my story. He said it’d be very easy to manipulate the laser into a crack or “valley” in my teeth to give a false positive and rack up dental work fees, if you were not reputable, which is why he did his dental work the old fashioned way, by poking and prodding and checking for cavities. Fast forward 6 years and I’ve only had one cavity, ever. The first dentist was a total scammer, full stop. Run.

      I would get an appointment with someone you trust–even if it means paying for addl exam fees. Ask around at work, alumni association email lists, neighbors–there are good dentists out there.

    • Ask for a copy of your x-rays and go to another dentist for a second opinion. You don’t have to repeat your x-rays. You can choose to be upfront (hi, I’m here for a second opinion) or not (just go in for another exam).

      I kinda wish I had done this before I got my grill drilled.

    • I had the same thing happen to me while in law school. In my whole life I’ve had 2 cavities. I walked into a new dentist, and was told I had 6 cavities, and major gum issues, and would I like to meet with their financial advisor. I declined, left, and waited for the holidays to see my old dentist. She told me my teeth and gums were perfectly fine.

      So, please get a second opinion. This sounds like a scam.

    • Anonymous :

      Definitely get a second opinion. Ask around amongst your friends or colleagues and find someone who really likes their dentist and go to that dentist. It is well worth getting a second opinion before allowing someone to muck around with your teeth, even if you have to pay for it out of pocket.

      I have never had a cavity in my life, but when I went to a new dentist when I moved for grad school I suddenly had 12 cavities that needed to be filled. When I asked him to show them to me on the films, he said that they were the kind of cavities that don’t show up on the x-ray films. I called my dentist from home who said I definitely needed to get a second opinion. I went to see a dentist that my friend swore by, and guess what? No cavities. It has now been about 12 years since this happened, and I still have never had a cavity.

      Unfortunately, I think there are a lot of shady dentists out there who will try to get $$$$ out of you or your insurance co. this way. But there are also fantastic dentists (I have been going to the one I got the second opinion from for years now). It just may take a few tries to find one.

    • Where do you live? Maybe someone here has a recommendation for you.

      • HappyHoya :

        DC

        • If you feel like trekking out to Fairfax, my family has been going to Dr. Robert Levine on Prosperity for years and we love him. He has never tried to oversell any of us.

        • I have an amazing dentist in DC: Dr. Al Cheek. I am terrified of dentists so that’s saying a lot. He does not take insurance but in my experience his non-insurance prices are lower than the insurance copays. Email me at dccorpor****@yahoo if you’d like his info.

        • Consider Drs. Khalil and Cho in Arlington (right off Clarendon stop). Dr. Cho NEVER tries to sell me anything and seems very conservative on recommending work. I really like him.

        • I go to Dr Dennis Milliron in Foggy Bottom and really like him. He has never oversold me and takes insurance.

        • DC Wonkette :

          I’ve been going to Dr. Blicher (1800 K St) for years and really like him. I’ve had fillings and veneers done — all outstanding. I went to him after being told by another dentist that my front teeth were about to fall out (really!?!) — for the record, they’re still intact :-).

    • Gail the Goldfish :

      Definitely get a second opinion. My first dentist in my “new” city (which took me 5 years to find, because I kept refusing to give up on my old dentist and went when I was home for holidays) told me I had two cavities, after never having any. Obviously, fairly minor, but I still begged my old dentist to see me while I was home over the week of Christmas for a second opinion (which she did, even though her office was technically closed, because she’s AWESOME). Sure enough, no cavities. She told me that a lot of the younger dentist are more likely to call something a cavity when it’s really just a stain, so I don’t think first dentist was necessarily trying to scam me, just overly cautious. I found a new dentist in the new city on a friend’s recommendation, who also found no cavities and was very good about looking at my x-rays to make sure there were no cavities. What city are you in? Maybe someone can make a recommendation.

    • Are you in DC? I would recommend my dentist, who is great and does not over-sell services (as compared to my husband’s dentist):
      Renis Kapshtica
      2021 K Street Northwest, Washington, District of Columbia 20006 –
      Ph:(202)223-2921

    • Jenna Rink :

      I’ll pile on and say run in the other direction! Something similar happened to me when I was in college and I wound up with two root canals that I am certain I would not have needed if I had a proper dentist. Ask your coworkers for a recommendation. I don’t understand how so many dentists get away with being scammy!

    • HappyHoya :

      Thank you to everyone for your advice. I am definitely going to get a second opinion. Special thanks to those who mentioned good dentists around DC- I will look to those places first.

      • I’m a bit late to the game but this happened to me as well. My dentist retired and his replacement tried to pressure me into several fillings. I went to another dentist for a second opinion who said I didn’t need them but there was one spot to watch. Three years later still no fillings needed and teeth all good!

  9. Traveller :

    Traveling with friends TJ:

    My husband and I are travelling to a friend’s wedding in the fall, along with 3 of my friends that are also going to the same destination wedding. Due to a large convention (think the size of E3, or ComicCon), the hotel rooms are more pricey than they normally would be. Normally it would be about $150-$175/night, but for this week they are more like $220-$300 a night. I saw this coming several months ago and planned accordingly.

    The friends…not so much. We’ve been trying to settle on a hotel that is walking distance to the wedding and the train lines so we don’t have to rent a car. As a consequence, those hotels are pricer. So friends first tried to get husband and I to share a room with them (5 of us? No thanks…), and when that failed, told me we would all just stay at a hotel way out by the airport for the cheaper rate. The thing is, I’m the one that would have to rent the car and pay for parking ($50/day for car plus $30/day for parking), and that makes my cost the same as it would be to stay at very nice hotel in the center of the action.

    I budgeted an appropriate amount for this destination wedding for me…and I’m about to just tell them to stay wherever is best for their budget, and we’ll meet up when we get there. I completely understand that their buget may not be the same as mine, but this is a new, really fun destination I’ve never been to, and I’m taking several vacation days to do it. I want it to be GREAT – not just another place to sleep.

    So I guess my question is…how do you cope when travelling with vastly different budgets? The last time I travelled with this group, I ended up footing the rental car, gas, all parking, and most of the food. I’m not really willing to do that again.

    • It sounds like you’ve been burned by this before. Book your room at your preferred hotel and let it be the end of it. Your friends can book at whatever fits their budget and then rent their own car/find a shuttle/take a cab/whatever to get to the wedding.

      Stand your ground and do what is best for you and your husband.

      • +1 This, 100%.

        It’s not your job to subsidize other people’s poorly made plans. If I were your friends who’d planned less well, I’d be embarrassed about essentially demanding an arrangement that would:

        1)take away all your privacy
        2)increase YOUR costs
        3)significantly inconvenient you.

      • +1
        You only get few vacation days per year, and you worked/saved to have a decent vacation budget. You owe it to yourself to have a great time and comfort level.

    • HappyHoya :

      Have you tried being direct with your friends about what your plans are, and that they are not open to change? Even if you don’t have firm plans for everything, saying something like “We are going to stay downtown” might end the discussion. I’ve been on both sides of this issue (either bringing up the possibility of sharing rooms or wanting to treat it like a vacation) and I don’t think you can go wrong being direct. You can always add something about how you’ve always really wanted to go to this destination so you’re looking forward to it being an awesome vacation. Maybe throw in something about romance so they don’t try to hang out with you and your spouse all the time. I would be surprised if your friends really pushed for everyone to stay in the same hotel. That’s strangely clingy.

    • Maybe I’m just mean (hazards of being monsterfolk) but why do you all have to stay in the same hotel? What would have happened if the hotel filled up? If no hotel had room for the entire group? Just let them know that you’ve taken care of your own hotel accommodations and keep quiet.

    • Ugh – what an annoying situation. Sounds like an “every man for himself” policy will work best for this trip – tell them you’ll see them at the wedding and leave it at that. Assuming these are adults, why are you responsible for solving the problems associated with their lack of planning.

    • I would explain your rationale (that after paying for a car rental/parking/gas it would really not be much cheaper to stay closer to the airport–and far less convenient), and hopefully they’ll realize that staying closer to the venue is the better option. If they don’t jump on board with you after you’ve pointed this out, I’d just do my own thing if I were you. You’ve budgeted, you’ve planned, and you deserve to have a great trip. You’ll get to see your friends at the wedding regardless, so don’t stress about it.

    • I think they and/or you are putting too much responsibility on you for this endeavor. Why is it your responsibility to rent the car for everyone? When traveling with friends, I try to be conscious of other people’s budgets, but ultimately I make a plan that works for me and they do the same. One of my friends and I were going to a third friends wedding. She was prepared to take public transit places; I preferred to rent a car. So I rented a car, she tagged a long when the schedule was right for her, but didn’t expect me to be her chauffeur. Make your plans, stick to them, and let your friends make theirs.

    • Anne Shirley :

      Why would you have to rent the car? Tell them you’re staying at Hotel X and you’re looking forward to seeing them. To be honest, I don’t handle traveling with people with different budgets/ideas about where to spend money very well. My vacation time is too precious to me to be a) overpaying for things I don’t care about or b) staying in the muddle of nowhere to save $

      • That’s me, too! I think my post may have been eaten, but I have a laundry list of out of town trips with this group where my choices are either 1) eat at cheap places and skip any “expensive” attractions I want to do because they don’t have the money or 2) pay for whatever it is for everyone so I can go. Not my thing. Also, probably a good indication why I hang out with this particular group less and less…

    • Could you try a vacation rental apartment or home in a good location? Might be cheaper and more spacious for everyone. We use vrbo dot com.

      • I considered this, but, in the end, I’m looking for more of a “it’s 1am, I think I want room service” experience than a choose-your-own-adventure type experience. I love that website though, and I will definitely consider that for our football game weekend in San Diego!

    • All great suggestions! I’ve said to them “I want to stay in X location and I’m really excited for this great vacation, etc. etc.” and I’m just still getting text messages about “well X is too expensive, we can’t afford it…” (not to mention two of the three are BRIDESMAIDS!!)

      As far as why…well, that’s a good question. I’ve always been the highest income earner in the group and have always been left with planning because of it – because I’m always the only one able to front the deposit costs. Huh. Now that I mention it, this is the case for concert tickets for this particular group, too, and several of them have never paid me back…

      Ok, see that is why I love this group!! My plan will be…every man for himself! I’m staying at the pretty fancy hotel near the venue and walking distance to all of the really fantastic things I want to do! (And not eating at cheap places I would rather not eat at or be forced to foot the bill for the nice places if I want to go there, this time, either!) Sheesh, I do have success guilt, I won’t deny that.

      • Rephrase that from I want to stay at X to I have reservations and am staying at X. You can even blame it on the hotel and say that you’d be charged a penalty for canceling your reservation.

      • Sydney Bristow :

        Yup, there’s no reason that when traveling with friends that you can’t split up. I say stay at the hotel you want, let them stay wherever they want, see the things and eat at the places you want part (most maybe) of the time and make sure to have some specific cheaper plans to do together (or treat if you want to eat somewhere nice for every meal, you could treat the group for 1 meal but you totally don’t have to do that!). Aside from traveling with 1 other person when neither of us wanted to explore alone, I’ve always ended splitting up from part of the group at some point if I or some segment of the group wanted to do something in particular. Just expand that idea to where you stay. You don’t have to spend every moment with the group and you certainly don’t have to fund or sacrifice your preferences for the sake of everyone else.

  10. So I just found out through back channels that a job I had really hoped to get was filled almost two weeks ago. The thing is, I was told that it was down to just one other candidate and me and I had been through multiple rounds of interviews, communications, etc. I was thinking of emailing my contact there (the person who would have been my direct supervisor) and saying something like I hear the position has been filled, I’m disappointed but hope that you’ll keep me in mind if anything else comes up. While I think it’s total B.S. that employers these days can’t even be bothered to ding people (people who had multiple interviews and jumped through lots of hoops!), since I got as far as I did, I’d like to at least turn this person into a potential contact. Does that sound like a good idea? What about the other two people I interviewed with?

    • It is SO Lame that employers don’t officially notify people who interviewed that they aren’t being hired!! UGH!! I’m sorry. There used to be a website to anonymously ask companies to Send Rejection Letters! It’s not that hard ;oP especially when someone has put in lots of time to interview, etc.

      Ask a Manager dot org has lots of advice on this but the short version is Yes, Definitely!!!! Writing back a nice email to the hiring manager, expressing disappointment but that you would still love to work there, and saying something specific you learned in the interview process about them or the company, so they know you really were listening, would probably serve you very well! And if they reply positively in any way, I would definitely try to turn this person into a networking contact that you stay in touch with about industry news, etc. Besides, if you do it professionally, it can’t hurt! you’ll either have a new contact, or you won’t, and you still won’t have the job you already don’t have. ;o\

      if you want more specifics, go to Ask a Manager and click on the “rejections” category.

    • mama of 2 :

      My husband did this and ended up getting the job when the first choice turned out not to work. I think it’s lame that they didn’t ding you in person, but if you can be the more gracious person, you might turn it into a valuable contact.

  11. June LSAT score arrived today – too scared to open the email. Afraid of being terribly upset at the results. What if I have to retake in October??

    • Then you’ll save up another $150, think about how you could do better, and re-take? Isn’t the best part about taking it in June that you do have that cushion to fall back on?

    • Then you have to retake it in October. Tons of people do it all the time for perfectly valid reasons like how they want a higher score. From someone who has made a habit of retaking standardized tests to better her score (the SAT, ACT, LSAT, barzam(except this one wasn’t optional)), it’s totally no big deal to anyone there. It’s not like your scantron is a different color, or you have to sit in the “repeaters” section. :-)

    • Even worse, what if you got a great score and have to go to horrible awful law school!

      • Anonymous :

        Seriously! I have to say that I have spent way too much time wishing that I hadn’t done well on the LSAT so that life would have prevented me from making a dumb choice.

  12. Ladies–this is a serious matter.

    I am getting ready to move, and I lined up all of my shoes out on a patio. Turns out I have 50+ pairs. This includes workout shoes, flip flops, sandals, dress shoes, winter shoes, hiking boots, rain boots and work shoes. I was reminded of the SATC episode where Carrie can’t get a mortgage but tells the banker she has a really excellent collection of Manolos she could use as collateral (disclosure–my shoes are nowhere near as fancy as Manolos). However, how many pairs is too many? This seemed CRAZY to me–I think I have too many. But I really do wear them all, and some pairs I’ve had for 10+ years.

    So…be honest. How many pairs of shoes do you think you own? Is it too many? How should I cull my shoes if I am moving to a smaller place?

    • I probably have 80 pairs myself, but like you, I do wear them. And I cull out shoes regularly. There is a young woman (recent grad) at work who wears my size and is always willing to take shoes that she would never be able to afford. I reorganized my shoe collection yesterday and designated a couple of pairs for assignment. I try not to keep shoes that I’m not wearing or just don’t work with outfits like I thought they would. As for culling, you could use the old 1) Have you worn them in the past year? and 2) Do you love them? If the answer to both is no, they should go.

    • HappyHoya :

      Good question! I am minimalist in a lot of things but I always struggle to thin out my shoes. Shoes are less versatile across seasons and activities than clothes are, so I’ve made peace with the fact that I still need snow boots, rain boots, hiking shoes, etc (in a tiny apartment), even if those things are not in regular rotation. I probably have about 35 pairs of shoes. I have a shoe rack/cubby thing that hold 25 pairs. I try to limit my collection to whatever fits in there, but there’s no way even a single boot would fit, so that 25 pair number doesn’t include any boots, or hiking boots/sandy beach flip-flops/utility footwear that lives in the front closet.

    • You’re right, this is a very serious matter! I have 30, including ski boots, bike shoes, etc. I could get rid of some old pairs but I wear most of them in the course of a year. I am of the mind that quality > quantity and I like to think I have a classic style– so most of my shoes are neutral and go w/everything. I say if you wear all of them, you should keep them! If space is an issue, try to get stacking shelves that fit into your closets– we have these in our 1 bdr apt. Just don’t buy any more– or if you do, get rid of a pair so you keep refreshing your wardrobe and not just accumulating unnecessarily.

    • I think I have around 25. About half of those I wear regularly, the other half only occasionally (plus my wedding shoes which I don’t think I’ve worn since I got married 5 years ago.) I would only toss ones that are, truly objectively, too worn or don’t fit comfortably.

    • anonypotamus :

      I am an admitted shoe horse but I have well over 50+ pairs of shoes (including workout shoes, work shoes, fun shoes, boots, flip flops, etc.) But I am always shocked at how many pairs I actually have when I sit and count them – they add up quickly! I routinely try and go through and cull mine down. My method is fairly similar to the one I use when cleaning out my clothes. I first look to see if I have worn it recently/how often I wear it. I remove any items that are beyond repair, too old, not comfortable, out of style, etc. I also pull out anything that needs to be fixed. Then I assess what is left and try and determine what is reasonable. I end up with more work shoes since I use those all the time. Once I started working full time, I found I needed fewer casual shoes. Then, I try and make sure I can think of outfits or occasions where I wear each pair. Sometimes, if I’m uncertain if I should keep a certain pair, I put them in a box, and pick an arbitrary amount of time (like six months). If I haven’t gone to the box to pull them out, I donate them. This obviously doesn’t work as well for seasonal or special occasion shoes, but I think it has worked well for most other types.

      I don’t know if this actually answers your question, but I don’t think there is necessarily a “right” answer for how many pairs is too many. If you wear them all, and have room to store them, don’t feel guilty about keeping them. Our current house has a fairly small master closet, so I have had to be creative in how I store my shoes (its a combination of keeping out of season shoes in less accessible areas and rotating the stock in my closet accordingly). If, however, you want to pare down and have fewer pairs, then decide which are the most versatile/comfortable/durable/etc. and go from there.

    • I have 50+ and don’t feel bad about it at all. I recently found a pair of evening shoes I had forgotten about.

    • Thanks for all of the tips–I am going to see what I can cut down and whether I can store out-of-season shoes under my bed in my new place. I’m moving from 2 closets to one, but it has been a very good exercise in “d0 I wear this?”/”which awesome friend can I bequeath this fabulous item which I have emotional attachment to from 5-10 years ago but cannot fit into?”

      If anyone is a true Size 11 (not 11.5 like me), post your email and I will send you two pairs of super-cute ballet flats that I bought in Vienna last year that utterly do not fit me. They are brand new.

      • I am a banana. :

        I am a size 11! iamabananarette at the g service

      • I am a banana. :

        Ugh moderation for my special e-mail.

        I am a size 11 in need of ballet flats! iamabananar.e.t.t.e at the google mail. Without all of those periods (although apparently they don’t matter).

    • I have 21 pairs of shoes, and I wear them to death.
      I consider my shoe collection to be very starved because I have to do a lot of editing. I have been in the corporate world for only 4 years, so still growing out of my college-girl shoes.
      I made few poor choices at the beginning of my career (flat girly ballet shoes, too tight shoes etc.).
      Also, a few months ago, I went to a sports doctor who informed me I had high arches and some other foot issues so no longer allowed to wear flat shoes. It turned out most of my shoes are very uncomfortable or inappropriate (sneakers).
      Now I have a rule: Every time that I buy 2 pairs of shoes, I part with one.
      I will probably stop at 35 or 40 pairs.

    • Anonymous :

      I googled it one time and the average American woman owns about 21 pairs so I stick to that!

  13. Anonymous :

    How do you ladies decide when you need to see a doctor versus when something is probably not serious? Especially if what you’re feeling is unusual?

    For the past year or so I’ve been experiencing on-and-off tingling/prickling sensations in my hands and feet. Similar to the prickly feeling you get when you’ve slept on your hand until it’s numb and it starts to wake up again. It’ll last for a few hours, disappear, then come back. Totally symmetrical on both sides. Not painful. No color changes. At my recent physical, my CBC was totally fine, ANA test was negative, B12 slightly low but corrected with an injection. Doc says maybe a super-mild form of Raynaud’s (blood vessels overconstricting in cold) without color changes, but… it’s not even remotely cold right now?? My bf thinks it’s all in my head. I don’t want to be that crazy person who thinks she’s sick when she’s not, but I also don’t want to miss anything potentially serious. What do you ladies think? Is this something to ignore or to make another appointment for? How do you make that call?

    • So, the interesting thing about nerve issues is that they cannot be objectively measured with labs (for the most part). Have you been taking new medication recently? I’ve experienced tingling for the first time every in my hands and feet when I started taking topamax. Thankfully, I’m off of it now so no more hands/feet/face tingling but I still enjoy the occasional head tingling/stabbing (Gaston is the best). I’ve also felt strange twitchy/tingly sensations with too much or too little Vitamin D.

    • HappyHoya :

      This isn’t medical advice, obviously, and I can’t tell you what is your personal tolerance for how much this is bothering you. I make these types of decisions based more on how much the possibility that something is wrong is scary to me, then try to do any sort of rational analysis of whether something is seriously wrong. My reasoning being (when I am in a situation like it sounds like you’re in), it’s probably nothing wrong, or nothing serious, but if you’re spending a lot of time thinking about it, and you would feel better ruling out the possibility of the worst-case-scenario you might be jumping to in your head, going to the doctor can be a huge comfort.

    • I would think about getting a second opinion, and maybe dumping the boyfriend (just kidding, but not really.)

      There are lots of minor and major ailments that include tingling of the hands and feet. Sometimes it’s a pinched nerve (annoying, but not lethal), sometimes, it’s a warning of pre-diabetes. (I am not a doctor, merely recounting what some of my relatives who’ve had tingling turned out to get. Some had nothing at all, just the weird tingling.)

      I’d get a second opinion. This is your health. I sometimes think we as a society do more research about a major appliance purchase than we do about stuff that might be happening to (or be done to) our bodies. And I think it’s better to err on the side of caution w.r.t to health.

      As for your boyfriend, I think he’s being dismissive and not very supportive. He may be utterly angelic on everything else, but on what basis does he think it’s “all in your head?” Is he an omniscient deity that he can make such a conclusive call? Maybe he had a bad day, but if he’s always like this, then I can tell you (speaking for my preferences only), I’d run far away and quickly. Bodies age, problems may come up– I’d like to know that the person I’m seeing/dating/living with/married to is sympathetic and supportive, rather than dismissive.

    • I would seek a second opinion. Even if a specialist says nothing is wrong, you’ll feel better for getting it checked out. Nerve problems can be indicative of many things, like MS, that cannot be ruled out by a GP.

    • I’m more of a wait and see, but if I remotely think it’s serious I call my sister, then go to a doctor.

      Women as a whole apparently ignore a lot of ailments and my boyfriend’s friend’s mother died of blood infection that couldn’t be treated because she ignored the cut for over a year until she landed in the hospital and passed away a few days later.

    • I am a banana. :

      My arms/hands were doing this. I moved my chair at work down two inches at a friend’s suggestion and haven’t had any of that since. Tiny things can make a big difference?

    • Pretzel_Logic :

      I had that feeling only in my right foot for a while last fall and it turned out to be a pinched nerve in my low back. It freaked me out for a while and then, surprise (and confirmed later by a doctor) went away the minute I got adjusted at the chiropractor. I absolutely know how scary it is though, so if you’re freaked, go to another doctor. If it’s nothing, yay! If it’s serious, you caught it! There’s no shame in hauling yourself to a doc if your body is doing freaky things. If the doc laughs at you, laugh it off–you’re the one feeling the weirdness, not them. Good luck!

    • Liz in the City :

      As someone who is NOT a doctor, I’d get this checked out until you get an answer you’re satisfied with. A few years ago, I thought I had just tweaked my back when I had an unexplained numb/tingling sensation on the right side of my body. It didn’t go away after a couple of weeks, despite rest, Tylenol, etc. After a few tests, it turned out I have MS (multiple sclerosis). I’m not saying you have that (at all), but I think that if you feel like this is bothering you enough, you should continue to track down going on. And good luck. Sometimes it feels like doctors just want to get you out of their offices rather than give you an actual answer.

    • This same sensation began happening to me after a lower back injury. Pinched nerves in your back can radiate the tingling sensation to your extremities – when I feel it flaring up now, I make sure to stand up, stretch my back, and readjust my walking/sitting stance. Being more mindful of my posture (admittedly: pretty bad) has made a huge difference

  14. In other news: I really HATE being asked at the last minute (i.e. 5 minutes before) to do something just because the person asking canNOT figure out how to plan ahead for something that happens every single week. [Godzilla Rawr]

    • COMMISERATION RAWR

    • The answer to this is: Your failure to plan does not constitute an emergency on my part.

      • Exactly Right! That WILL be my daily motto when I finally get a new job!!!! (and I know what you’re going to say next, NOLA!) ;o)

    • By any chance, was this assignment given to you by one fo the Manb*tches?

      Isn’t there some brand of canned sloppy joes called Manwich? I want to take that font, and change it to Manb*tches for the whiny last minute poor planners at your company.

      • DINGDINGDING, Tell her what she’s won, Al!

        Yes, this is one of the same three dooshes that are on my sh1t list already. I love your brand modification idea. If I had any graphic design skills whatsoever, I would totally make that Gif. ;o)

  15. I’m a summer intern at a city attorney office, and am in charge of putting together a presentation on public notice requirements for a state environmental law, and then presenting it to an important group in town. I have not made a powerpoint since probably high school (10+ years ago), and so I was wondering if anyone had tips on effective powerpoint presentations. Thanks!

    • lucy stone :

      Come intern at my city attorney’s office instead! Keep your powerpoint as simple as possible. There is a great lifehacker article with some tips @ http://www.lifehack.org/articles/technology/10-tips-for-more-effective-powerpoint-presentations.html.

    • I am SO bad at this, but try to make most of your slides a Title, and an Image. And then ‘say’ your information, but don’t put all of the text on the tile. My coworkers are good at coming up with images that are kind of a visual play on the title of the slide, but I am terrible at thinking outside the box, so I can never think of what image to search for.

      What I do to cut down on the amount of words on my slides, is first I go through a first draft and make slides for each section of my presentation, usually bullet-point lists. Then I go back through a second time and just slash out extra words. and put those into my notes so that I know what I wanted to talk about, but leaving only one word or phrase on the slide. Example: on my first run I might write: “Increased sales of item by 13%” on my second go through that becomes “Sales +13%” something like that.

    • Keep it simple. No crazy slide transitions (gives off a “my first powerpoint presentation” vibe, imo), no crazy fonts, etc. Keep bullets fairly short, with most of the info in your notes. The easiest way to lose your audience is to just read directly from your slides. Charts, graphs, etc are great. So are images, if they’re relevant. Try to preview the presentation on the computer and projector you will be using. Sometimes slides look different from what you expected on the big screen and sometimes different computers can mess up your formatting.

      • Marie Curie :

        This. Don’t play around. My thesis adviser LOVED all of powerpoint’s effects and used them in every slide. (Think letters flying in individually, slides opening up on transitions, sentences wriggling in.) He was a good professor and really good at lecturing, but I couldn’t get over his powerpoint slides.

        I would also add: Make a pdf of the presentation and use that because it will look the same on every computer.

  16. I’ve never counted, but if you’re going to include specialty footwear like rain boots, hiking boots, etc, I have WAY more than 50 pairs. Good lord, I must have at least 15 pairs of black shoes alone if you include sandals, work shoes (winter and summer), evening shoes, etc.
    Do you really need to cull them down just because you’re moving to a smaller place? Can’t you just be smart about what you have in your closet at any given time and keep speciality or out of season shoes in storage?

    • HappyHoya :

      What storage? In places I’ve lived where cost prompted me to live in a small space, I never had included storage, and renting a separate storage unit is pricey. Do a lot of people who live in small apartments do this? I would love to have a place to stash off-season stuff and the hub’s sports equipment, but I never knew another who paid for space to keep their stuff, and it just seems soooo strange to me.

      • I didn’t mean a separate storage unit that she would rent, just wherever she can find space — top of a less convenient closet, a basement, a friend or family member’s attic, etc. Though in fact those rental units aren’t necessarily all that expensive, depending on where you live.

      • We’ve become storage masters and try to use all space including drawers under the bed and containers above the closet.

      • mama of 2 :

        When we lived in NYC, we had no in-apartment storage (other than under the bed, etc.) and rented a small storage unit for things like the Christmas tree stand, my husband’s golf clubs, the box of china that we got as a wedding present, etc. It was not very expensive and made my life much better.

    • anonypotamus :

      My house is pretty small and doesn’t have a lot of available storage, but we’ve tried to utilize any unused space for things like out of season shoes. We raised our master bed so there is more space underneath for drawers and boxes and also have gotten creative about other areas of storage. There are lots of websites that have creative ideas for storing shoes in particular, but also other things as well. Think shelves over doors, narrow cabinets in hallways, over the door racks, hanging storage pieces, etc. Its not always ideal, but better than nothing!

  17. Bar Exam Anon :

    Can anyone please reassure me about the bar exam? I’m studying like 6 hours a day in addition to lectures, I can’t seem to finish anything BarBri assigns, I’m getting 3’s and 4s on the graded essays, and i don’t know when I’m going to have time to commit this stuff to memory. Any advice from the wise legal eagles?

    • Gail the Goldfish :

      Don’t panic. No one finishes all the BarBri assignments. The BarBri assignments are insane. Also, I’m convinced they grade the essays super harshly initially to freak you out and make you study. You’ve still got a full month before the exam. Plenty of time to learn what you need to know.

      Here’s my reassuring thought on the bar exam: it is a minimum competency test. It’s not school. You don’t have to get an A. You just have to pass. Think about all the stupid lawyers you know (and if you don’t know any, trust me, there are a lot): they all passed the bar exam. You’ll be fine. (Or thus I keep repeating to myself as I try to both work a full-time lawyer job and study for another state’s bar)

    • Remind yourself, you don’t need to ace the bar exam, you only need to pass it. I worked while preparing, and was not even remotely close to being on the BarBri schedule. I attended all the BarBri and PMBR classes, but outside that I just did some multi choice practice problems, outlined essays (didn’t really write out full ones) and still passed the CA bar exam, handwriting it. But I’m a decent standardized test taker and have never had an issue finishing tests in the time allowed.

    • I am a banana. :

      I failed every single BarBri essay exam. I passed the bar.

      You aren’t going to commit all of that stuff to memory. Start doing real time practice essays to learn how to analyze it. It’s your analysis, not your memorization, that makes you pass (at least it was in CA when I took it).

      And if you are somewhere mean, like CA, where they don’t allow you to take food in, make sure you take a granola bar in your pants waistband (yoga pants with a credit card slot and a baggy sweatshirt are good for this) in case you have a meltdown. I credit my bar exam toilet stall Luna bar face shove during a crimpro meltdown for 80% of my current attorney status.

      • Bar Study Sucks :

        Thanks for your tip about the food. I snack all the time when I am studying and was worried that I will get hungry.

        To Bar Exam Anon: I feel your pain and totally understand what you are going through. I study an average 10-12 hours a day and still unable to finish everything that is assigned in Barbri but I have learn to accept it and move on. Best of luck!

    • When I was studying for the bar exam, I had a meltdown at least every other day. During one of those moments I ran across this article [link to follow], and the part about the three levels of knowledge made a lot of sense to me (and helped to calm me down when I couldn’t remember every detail of every rule of every area of law). Some other good advice I received was not to worry about the long outlines. The fact is, the BarBri lecturers know what they’re doing… and if for some reason something shows up on the exam that wasn’t covered in the lectures, the odds are that at least 90% of people will be in the same boat as you. Your time would be better spent getting a good handle on the information covered in lectures than reading tons of material that likely won’t be tested.

      Good luck! You’ll be fine. But if you do find yourself at a breaking point, take a moment to google the famous people who failed the bar exam… Made me feel better :)

    • I didn’t do BarBri and didn’t start studying until two weeks before the bar. I didn’t take any practice exams, didn’t take half the bar subjects in law school, and somehow, miraculously, I passed…. you will be fine!

  18. This is obviously a very first world problem, but someone else posted earlier today about what to do with money now that she’s maxed out her savings, and I have the same problem. However, I think stocks are a bad bet right now, and bonds are still looking so bad.. I have money in my savings account over emergency savings that I really want to put somewhere because I’m getting such a low interest rate – where else do you invest in times like this?

    • Anonymous :

      If you have that much extra money, you should probably be hiring a financial advisor to help you with this.

      • That’s the thing – it’s not that much money as I’m mostly just starting out but I feel like the “money in savings is money wasted” mantra has been drilled into me.

        • How soon would you want to use those funds? Are you trying to save for retirement (let’s assume 15+ years away), child’s education (5-10 years away) or buying a house (1-2 years away)? How much do you hope for them to grow in that time period? Do you have any restrictions in what you will invest in (e.g. staying away from pharmaceutical companies) or any interests you want to support (e.g. clean energy)? I think the best answer is going to be a diversified portfolio of some sort – say you have $20,000. You could put $5,000 in higher risk stocks, $5,000 in a high interest CD or something else easily accesible in the short term and very low risk, and $10,000 in something mid-risk. But it really depends on how you would want to use and access the money in the future.

          Take some meetings with financial planner or investment advisors. You can start at your bank, or any of the major companies (Morgan Stanley, Charles Schwab, etc.). Get some ideas from them about what would be feasible with your savings, and then do some research on what is performing well and what risks you want to take.

      • Anonymous :

        I’ve put away a nice stash (was saving for a down payment, then decided maybe buying a condo wasn’t for me quite yet), but in looking for something to do with that stash, I’ve realized that a good financial advisor is hard to find. The ones I’ve seen either try to sell me a whole life policy or suggest a few of their own funds, which makes me leery. I have been sitting on my cash for too long, though … interest rates are so abysmal. I guess I will keep meeting with advisors until an investment is suggested that makes sense to me.

    • Decorating question :

      Crunchy, that question shows up as I’m decorating my dream apt in my mind.

      Did you use to comment on the WSJ’s Juggle blog?

  19. Decorating question :

    Planning for a big move that will mean starting over with very little furniture from my life til now, I’ve been mapping out my fantasy apt, room by room. The kitchen/dining room is the only one approaching neutral colors. I even have a great scheme in mind for the central hall. So my question is: how much is too muc? Lookin from the opposite direction: how can I tie disparate styles and colors together? I’m talking about chic Art Deco in one room, a crisp nautical theme in another, funky OP art in the hallway… so how do I achieve that cool combo feel, as opposed to a fun house where every room is different? I love my plans for all the rooms, really don’t want to give any of them up, but do want it to look like a grown-up’s place.

    • I don’t have an eye for these types of things at all, so take it with a grain of salt, but maybe different styles but in a common color family, or something else to unify it? I’m so bad at this I hired a decorator.

  20. Miss Behaved :

    PSA: Shade Clothing is closing. Final sale at 80% off
    http://www.shadeclothing.com/index.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374303003787&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524445995720&bmUID=1372766925194

    I have a couple of their items, including a great denim skirt.

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