Suit of the Week: Talbots

For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional.

This light blue suit from Talbots seems kind of perfect for summer. I like that it’s mostly cotton (lined with 100% polyester, which can go both ways), and I like the light blue/dark blue combination and the subtle pattern to the suit. I also like the contrast piping and the basic pencil skirt, and I think the round neck is flattering. You could wear these pieces together or by themselves, too. As always with Talbots, there’s a very nice range of sizes: misses 2-20, petites 0P-14P, and woman 12W-24W. The jacket (Biscay Jacket) is $189, and the skirt (Biscay Pencil Skirt) is $99.

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Comments

  1. Anonymous :

    Has anyone tried Rit dye on silk? I have a couple of final clearance tops from AT, but the color makes me look like death warmed over. Considering trying to change the color from pink to brown…advice?

    • It might shrinkif the required temp is high

    • GirlFriday :

      I’ve only used RIT dye on denim, but it worked pretty well. There are lots of videos and the RIT site is pretty helpful. It may not work but I say go for it! If you try it, definitely do the vinegar or salt – it really helps the color stick!

    • Seattle Freeze :

      You might have better success with an acid or fiber reactive dye meant for dyeing silk from Dharma Trading, like the ones at http://www.dharmatrading.com/dyes/dyes-for-dyeing-silk-wool-nylon.html.

  2. Mary Mary Quite Contrary :

    I’ve had PMS for so long/my period is so late that I’m wondering if it’s actually pregnancy and I’m the new v*rgin Mary.

    • Hah!

    • Anonymous :

      stress?

    • anon4this :

      Omg are we the same person? I’ve also had PMS for so long that I’ve started to wonder if crying over Wonder Woman ads is just my new normal.

    • When I’ve been in this situation, I have found that wearing white pants is a guaranteed way to jump-start your missing p*riod.

      • Mary Mary Quite Contrary :

        I wore light colored pants the other day, no dice! At this point I just want it because cramps + emotions + general gross feeling is getting real old.

        • I hear you. Unfortunately, even thinking about wearing white pants one day did it for me, so I guess that trick doesn’t work for you. :(

      • Anon in NYC :

        Or taking a pregnancy test! Works like a charm for me.

    • Anonymous :

      This was my first month TTC and my period is TWO WEEKS LATE (with all the PMS symptoms) but all the pregnancy tests are negative. I’ve taken like…17 of them. I called the doctor and she said that stressing about when/whether your period will arrive can make it late. So I guess try to stop thinking about it? Easier said than done though for sure!

      • This happened to me early on in TTC and I convinced myself I was pregnant. Nope, turns out I just ovulated really late, which threw off the timing of my whole cycle. If you’ve taken that many negative pregnancy tests (I did the same thing!) and not one looks remotely positive, you probably just have to wait it out. It will show up eventually!

  3. Nail polish help, please. What is your favorite sheer pink / neutral color for fingers? Along the lines of Mademoiselle, but I’m tired of it. OPI and Essie only (that’s what my place uses). Must be sheer. Shimmer ok.

    Thank you!

  4. Pittsburgh :

    Thinking of taking a weekend trip to Pittsburgh over July 4th weekend (July 1-3 probably). It’s a couple hours away by car but have never been (and want to check out IKEA). Any suggestions of what to do, where to stay, or generally how to plan the weekend? Will be two couples in their late 20s/early 30s. Interested in sightseeing, good food, spending time outside (weather permitting).

    • No advice myself, but check out Summer Wind (it’s a blog – author is in her late 20’s and frequently reviews restaurants, etc)

    • I love Pitsburgh! I went there with the manageing partner a few year’s ago and got a great deal on my schrunchies, many of which I still have! There is a great place near the river, where you can get a ride goieng up the hill, and also a nice place downtown near the building with all Glass. Very pretty place. The men there are nice too. They are NOT out just to have s-x with us! I would go back if I had another depo to take there. Have fun! YAY!!!

    • Anonymous :

      Where are you coming from?

    • Mrs. Jones :

      The baseball stadium is great, but I’d avoid the Iron City beer (no offense to local residents). Wright’s Fallingwater is a couple of hours away and worth seeing.

      • cactus killer :

        Agree about the baseball stadium and Fallingwater (although Fallingwater will take at least half a day away from the city to see).

        Other sightseeing: I think Mattress Factory is the most interesting / unique art museum in Pittsburgh and always take out-of-towners there. It’s on the North Side in an area called the Mexican War Streets, which has pretty old row houses. City of Asylum (a nonprofit that provides residencies for exiled writers from around the world) is also over there, and they recently opened a cute little bookstore and a good but pricy restaurant called Casellula.

        Lawrenceville is another neighborhood that’s nice to walk around. There are some cute shops and good food: La Gourmandine (great French bakery), The Vandal (good brunch), Piccolo Forno (classic Italian), Grapperia (Piccolo Forno’s sister bar right around the corner), Smoke (greasy but delicious Tex-Mex).

        Apteka (in Bloomfield / Lawrenceville) has really good vegan Polish food (which doesn’t sound promising, but I swear it is!) and really really good cocktails. Across the street is Allegheny Cemetery, which is pretty and peaceful for wandering around and seeing lots of old Pittsburgh names, if you’re into that sort of thing.

        It’s a great city — hope you love it!

    • Sassyfras :

      You have to ride the incline up to Mount Washington for sunset. Stay at Hotel Monaco downtown or Ace Hotel in East Liberty, both have amazing restaurants. Ace Hotel is close to lots of other good restaurants and definitely get dessert at Millie’s Ice Cream. I would also check out Smallman Galley – it’s a restaurant incubator and they just got their new class of chefs, basically like a fancy food court but the food and atmosphere is amazing. It’s in the Strip District which is a fun place to walk around on Saturday mornings. For outdoorsy stuff, you can go kayaking on the river (sign up underneath the bridge by PNC Park), or go hiking in Frick Park. Fallingwater is about an hour away and near Ohiopyle, lots more hiking there, but personally I would stay in the city since there is so much to do.

      • +1 to all of this.

        If you have specific cuisine you’d like to try, OP, let us know. I lived in Squirrel Hill for several years, and have some favorite east end restaurants.

        But please, please, please go to the Strip District on Saturday morning. Get tiny donus, or Pamela’s or Deluca’s for breakfast. Walk around all the vendors. Maybe visit the Heinz museum, and see the life size wax figure of Mr. Rogers and other cool stuff. Get lunch at the Smallman Gallery.

        If you’re going to be in/near Oakland, the cathedral of learning is awesome (on Pitt’s campus) and last I knew had a tape-guided tour of all the nationality rooms that was fun, if you like that kind of thing. The botanical garden is also in Oakland, and is gorgeous and relaxing. Frick park is also wonderful, and you’ll forget you’re in the city.

        If you like bars/nightlife/hole-in-the-wall eateries, the South Side is where it’s at.

        • Sassyfras :

          South Side seems like a younger crowd to me (21-25) though I haven’t been there in several years. My friends generally like to go out in Lawrenceville or Shadyside.

    • For Italian food – Piccolo Forno in Lawrenceville (byob), Stagioni in South Side, or Vallozzi in Downtown

      Other great restaurants: Cure, Tako, Poros (seafood) Round Corner Cantina (Mexican), Silk Elephant (Thai)

      Sightseeing – museums to check out: Mattress Factory, Warhol, Randyland

      Outside activities – incline to Mount Washington, Hofbrauhaus outdoor beer garden, Penn Brewery similar to Hofbrauhaus but more “Pittsburgh” than “German”

      • Or! Or! Church Brew Works, also in Lawrenceville (but only if you’re OK with the setting being a de-sanctified Eastern Orthodox church). Sit on the bar side. Order wood-fired pizza, drink beer.

        You also can’t go wrong with Penn Brewery or Hofbrauhaus.

        • +1 LOVE Church Brew Works. I always bring visitors there.

          PS – It’s a former Roman Catholic Church, not Eastern Orthdox. :-)

    • Falling Water is just outside of Pittsburgh, if you’re a Frank Lloyd Wright fan.
      http://www.fallingwater.org/

    • Pennsylvanians, if you are so inclined, don’t forget to take 3 minutes to call Sen. Pat Toomey and shame him for trying to take away healthcare from children and the poor. He works for you!

    • lost academic :

      The fireworks are NOT to be missed. Sit on one of the bridges downtown.

    • Pittsburgh :

      Thanks everyone!

      My husband was thinking of adding the Palace of Gold in West Virginia to the trip. His coworker recommended it. Has anyone been? Worth it? We’d probably tack in on either before or after 2 days in Pittsburgh; not sure which way works better logistically.

      • Alanna of Trebond :

        I have been, although it was years and years ago. I loved it. I was also an elementary-school aged child. I have often thought of going back.

  5. Following up on some of this morning’s discussion – my D&D group uses Roll20 (an online tabletop game tool) for games since a couple of players are remote. If anyone on the board is interested in an all-woman remote game (either D&D or Shadowrun) I’d be happy to GM. Hit me up at malkiyyah13 @ gmail.

    • Anonymous :

      This is amazing. I’m emailing you.

    • Calibrachoa :

      Ladies, any suggestions for a hotel in Chicago? I’ve never been and neither has my girlfriend, but we’re staying there for a few days before I fly home. We don’t have any concrete plans other than going to the Fields museum to say hi to Sue the T-Rex, and since I will be between paychecks due to switching jobs we’re hoping to keep it budget-friendly while still cute and romantic. Parking is a necessity

      • a millenial :

        i like hotel monaco (the kimpton one) in dt chicago for being close to the water, touristy things, millenium park etc.

      • The Burham was another Kimpton in Chicago and it’s now called the Alise. It’s a good deal for a downtown hotel and it’s in a cool building with a good bar.

        I think you will be SOL for free parking at any downtown hotel. Most hotels are around $50 per day for self-park. I’d go with Spot Hero to find something and rely on public transit while you’re here

        If you really want free parking, you pretty much have to stay at an airport or suburban hotel and take the long ride on public transit to get into the city.

        • Calibrachoa :

          Thanks! Yeah, not having high hopes for the free parking, I’m basically just used to specifying when it’s needed because I’ve stayed in a lot of places in Europe that don’t offer parking of any kind due to Ye Ole Medieval City Aesthetic :D

          I’d never heard of spot hero, thank you for the recommendation! :D

      • Wildkitten :

        I might have a huge apartment in Chi soon if you want to hang out with me!

      • If you want to be in a neighborhood instead of downtown, check out Longman & Eagle’s hotel. There’s a lot of street parking around there. Or I’ll give you some parking passes:)

        • Calibrachoa :

          Alas, they are booked for our dates :( but i certainly would not say no to a parking pass :P

    • Calibrachoa :

      whoops that was supposed to be its own thread, but yes I am also totally emailing you because my life needs more girl gang dnd ;)

    • CherryScary :

      You rock! I’m in too many games right now (run a game through my work league, and play in another campaign with friends) But its awesome seeing other ladies in the hobby!

  6. The terrible tragedy in London got me thinking about fire safety. We have fire drills at work but not at home, so I just emailed management of our apartment high rise about having a drill and going through *all* the exits in case of smoke or fire in one of the stairwells. When we were kids fire safety day at school (which was like 4 times a year) also meant we were supposed to go home and come up with an action plan for our homes (as well as bug our parents about smoke and CO detectors), so just something to think about whether you live in a high rise or single family home.

    • Sloan Sabbith :

      I live in a 7 story building, and seeing those photos still terrified me.

    • When I lived in a high rise, we had a fire on the 18th floor. I was blown away by the public safety response, and very grateful. My husband is a volunteer emt/ff and it made me proud and afraid, all at the same time.

      What angered me to no end was the way that residents of the building responded. So few actually evacuated until the last moment (skipping, of course, the people who shelter in place for legit reasons), and when they did, they just crowded the exits and got in the way. There were people trying to get their cars out of the garage (below building) because heaven forbid your precious car is implicated, don’t mind the 50 public safety response vehicles trying to get to the building. People were AWFUL and impeded the response.

      I wrote a furious-at-other-people email to building management about it, and got lip service. They have the power to at least educate and threaten the other idiots in the building, I figured, but they didn’t do much. I wish you MUCH better luck.

      • Senior Attorney :

        Oh this behavior makes me so ragey. Same as the stupid people trying to get their carry-ons off the burning airplane. Ugh!!

        I used to be like that but after 9/11, when I hear an alarm I evacuate first and ask questions later. My co-workers laugh at me but I am super duper okay with that.

        I am very happy that I work on the ground floor with an actual open-able window in my office that’s big enough to climb out of in an emergency.

    • Marshmallow :

      25th floor here. Our building is new, sprinklers, fire alarms, etc. but the stories this morning really messed with me. We’ve had to evacuate before for a gas leak but never a fire. Shudder.

    • We have a building speaker system that enables EMS to give directions to residents in the event of a fire (including whether it is safe to leave or you should shelter in place). They’re actually doing the annual test right now, and I’m super grateful for it.

    • I lived in a high rise and had fire drills quarterly. During the two real fires (thanks old people for falling asleep with food in the oven) everyone evacuated smoothly and it wasn’t a big deal.

    • We live in a low “high-rise” building. We’ve had a couple of fire alarms go off, but it’s always been someone’s cooking burning so nothing serious. But because it’s never been serious, I never grab my cat to evacuate when it goes off…and I wonder if I will be able to figure out if it’s a “real” fire when the time comes?

      • it’s unlikely… so keep a crate or carrier somewhere easily accessible, hell, even a gym bag with a zipper would contain the cat for a short while in an emergency and can be hung over a doorknob or something to keep it nearby. You should be practicing taking her when the alarms go off so that it’s second nature and so the cat doesn’t hide or get forgotten in a moment of stress!

      • Blonde Lawyer :

        Animal shelters have fire sack for quick kitty evacuations. They look like big pillow cases with a draw string but are breathable and hard to claw through. It would allow a rescuer to hold 5+ in each hand (by the draw string handle). The cats wouldn’t enjoy it but they would each have their own sack and get out quick. It might be easier to get your kitty into an open mouth sack then in a carrier if he/she hates the carrier.

        FF – thanks for the gym bag idea. We are in a house so no false alarms but we keep our carrier in the basement. In an emergency, the gym bag idea is a great one and there is usually one on each floor of the house.

        • fake coffee snob :

          If not a fire sack, I’ve heard a plain pillowcase recommended as well – the advantage is if a scared kitty is hiding, you can put the pillowcase over your hand and just grab them. We actually used pillowcases to transport several types of small animals (snakes especially) at the zoo I used to work at so I guess they’re popular for that.

    • That’s a great idea. You may want to ask your local fire department to take part. It’s helpful to know what to do in case you cannot get out of your apartment.

  7. Philly Fall fun :

    Looking for ideas for trip to Philadelphia in late Oct/early Nov. There are lots of things to do there (Constitution Hall! Digger!), so that’s not the issue. We need to sync two very different ideas about vacation. One of us likes to activate body & mind–history, science, walking tours, kayaking are all good, just a chance to dive into something very different from the every day. The other wants to completely chill out, finds even yoga classes and concerts too demanding. We are looking for a place that combines the two, like a park or cafe with outdoor seating in an interesting historic area, or a nice hotel that offers spa and activities.

    We haven’t bought plane tix yet, so are open to other cities, but do want this to be an urban adventure.

    • I should’ve mentioned street performers or other entertainment to keep “squirrel!” occupied while veg relaxes for an afternoon.

    • What does “chill out” mean? I mean, he must want to do SOMETHING that isn’t sitting in the hotel room watching TV? A few ideas…

      – Restaurant on a park with good people watching: Parc on Rittenhouse Square (they have heaters for the outdoor tables). You could also stop by the nearby La Colombe for coffee and sit in the square.

      – Rent bikes (we have a bikeshare program) and take a lazy loop around Center City (i.e., downtown) or down the Schuylkill Banks trail. Also a good way to circle the historical s!tes / decide which you’ll investigate further.

      – He takes a nap (or you leave him at a bar to watch football) while you go to the museum of your choice (Art Museum is of course a classic but there’s interesting smaller museums too – the Barnes is incredible)

    • Cookbooks :

      The Spruce Street Harbor Park! There are floating gardens, food, beer, and you can even reserve hammocks to just like back and chill out. I think the park is open until October, though, so you might just miss it, timing-wise.

      The Historic Strawberry Mansion might be nice, too. It’s a nice little historical site and it’s adjacent to Fairmount Park, which is huge and runs on both sides of the Schuylkill River. There’s lots of sculpture and art in the park, along with things like the Fairmount Waterworks (which has a restaurant, I believe), a Japanese House and Garden, and the Philadelphia Museum of Art (run the Rocky steps!) is nearby, too.

    • Philly isn’t much of a spa town, but if you want a little combo of both of your ideal vacays rent a car and visit New Hope/Washington’s Crossing for the day. New Hope has a cute little shopping/restaurant district with lots of outdoor cafes – some on the river, gorgeous towpath for walking/biking/meditating, art galleries, and just lovely scenery. Across the bridge is Lambertville for more restaurants (check out the bar at Anton’s at the Swan), a brewery or antiquing. It’s also the site where George Washington crossed the icy Delaware River on Christmas Day to sneak up on the Hessians who were in Trenton, NJ. You could probably find some walking tours of the Washington Crossing park or check out Bowman’s Hill. Princeton isn’t far either for more shops, dining and beautiful scenery, particularly in the fall.

      In downtown Philly, the Four Seasons (re-opening after a massive multi-year renovation this fall) will have a spa, or the spa at the Rittenhouse Hotel is nice. Toppers is the fancy lady Rittenhouse Square spa but I don’t recall being impressed although that was like 15 years ago.

      Also to do in Philly – walk up and down Kelly/Montgomery Drive and check out the boathouses and rowers, visit a beergarden (some will probably be open until fall, but earlier is better), eat a lot of good food, go to the art museum, Rodin museum, and the private collection that just moved there that I can’t remember the name of, the Cathedral, hop on, hop off trolley tour (sounds stupid, is not – skip the Duck boats), Zoo, Reading Terminal, Academy of Natural Sciences, Mutter Museum of medical oddities, Rosenbach Museum (rare books!), Italian Market, OMG I could go on all day.

      What does your travel partner want to do? Sit in the hotel room? Even if you make no plans and wander around you’ll come across neat stuff.

    • So many goodnight ideas–Rittenhouse Sq, Strawberry Mansion, Fig & jail, hop-on/hop-off trolley all sound really good. I also really appreciate the comment that we’d find things to do without planning, and the example from someone who did just that. He is always saying that’s what we should do, and I’m always afraid that we’ll miss out on everything that way. I’m going to save these comments and a few schedules in my phone, and might be willing to step out with no plans. Yikes!

      • Anonymous :

        Philly is perfect for no plans fun (assuming you’re staying in center city) because it’s so walkable and there are no major interruptions between neighborhoods (like highways). There’s a great food culture, so it’s hard to go wrong in that arena. I miss it!

    • I have no Philly-specific advice, but I can tell you that a quiet bar that does tastings or flights and/or has darts or pool is a winner in my relationship. I read, drink, and relax. She plays pool and learns about beer.

      • Oooh, Tria (several locations) does “Sunday School” involving really yummy wine. I forgot about it because I don’t pass it on my commute any more.

  8. Shopping help! :

    I’m looking for somewhat formal sheath dresses for work that are looking lightweight and breathable. I recently switched jobs and now (1) walk to and from work, about 1.5 miles each way; and (2) work in an office that tis not super air conditioned (I guess at least I’m not always freezing?). My workplace is on the very formal end of business casual (non-matching blazers opposed to suits), and my typical summer uniform is a sleeveless suiting dress and a blazer. This summer even my sleeveless dresses feel too warm for walking and for the office, because they’re all wool/wool-blend or thicker poly. Any recommendations for linen or cotton sleeveless dresses that are still in a formal cut? I love the JCrew emmaleigh dress and basically want a bunch of those in linen! TIA :)

    • givemyregards :

      Do you like Boden? This cotton may be too heavy, but would probably be better than wool: http://www.bodenusa.com/en-us/womens-dresses/smart-day/ww103-mbl/womens-navy-garland-martha-dress

      This is a cotton blend, and has a v instead of crew neck, but I think it would look great with a blazer http://bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1010447&pcid=69883&vid=1&pid=783764002

      • Nelly Yuki :

        Wait, can we talk about this Boden dress? I HATE their dipped backs. Even though I have two dresses with them and I wear them, I always feel weird about it. Am I the only one?

    • Depending on your budget, you might look for some silk sheath dresses. I have 2 that I bought while travelling (forgot the brand, but they were in the $300 range) that are thin but opaque silk crepe. Crepe is good because it’s not shiny like most silk, so doesn’t look like underwear. They are amazing comfortable, whisper thin (but doesn’t look it), and very breathable.

    • Can you change clothes when you get to work? That seems like the best solution.

      • +1 — I have a similar walking commute, a similar dress code, and I just change in the office building bathroom.

    • applesauce :

      I’ve had the best luck with JCrew for more formal cotton and linen workwear, but I need to go to a store and try on the whole summer line to see how they actually feel, how much and with what material they are lined, etc. All my current workhorses are from prior seasons because I am able to snag 1-2 new ones on sale after the summer season to wear the next year. Are you open to not a traditional sheath shape? Here are a couple promising-looking ones but may be a little off with a blazer:

      https://www.jcrew.com/p/womens_category/suiting/dresses/goingplaces-dress-in-linen/G4446
      https://www.jcrew.com/p/womens_category/suiting/dresses/belted-dress-in-linen/G4564

      Or more traditional:
      https://www.jcrew.com/p/womens_category/suiting/dresses/drape-knot-dress-in-irish-linen/G4448
      https://www.jcrew.com/p/womens_special_shops/weartoworkshop/dresses/piped-dress-in-stretch-cotton/G5854

    • Can you switch to pencil skirt + top + blazer? You’ll save a ton on dry cleaning.

  9. Anonymous :

    Heh. I’m guessing ONE of you wants this to be an urban adventure, and the other one wants an urban veg out. : )

    Are you OK doing the “go and do” stuff by yourself? Or are you trying to find a place where you can go and do while the other one sits, or will you both go and do for an hour and then sit and veg for an hour?

    • Anonymous :

      oops. That’s for the Philly post above.

    • Philly Fall fun :

      Exactly! And I guess I just gave away which one I am ;)

      There’s little hope of getting veg to join me in many exploits, but I’d like to stay in touch throughout the day. When we’ve stayed at a resort, I’ve nipped off to do the sunrise yoga on the beach, come back for breakfast together, done a little shopping, tried to cajole him into snorkling, settled for soaking in the hot tub, slashing in the pool and chilling poolside with a drink together…. so a hotel with things like cooking classes or even lectures on local history could work. But we’d take better advantage of a city if we went beyond the hotel. The dream find would have interesting stuff right by the cafe. Maybe a market or carousel that makes for good people-watching, or historic gardens. We have happened into places like that, but it is hard to look for it online with standard search tools.

      • Triangle Pose :

        Reading terminal market! All the different foods, plus I think that there are demonstrations and cooking classes in the back. Great to try the Amish stalls and all of the unique offerings. Fairmount park and all the bar and restaurants there- Bar Hygge is a great microbrewery – you can try the smaller portions of all of their different beers for $4 each. Figs is a great bring your own wine restaurant (Mediterranean and North African) and Hickory Lane is a great option. Both are close to Eastern State Penitentary, a cool super old prison with tours and lots of history and creepy fun. Elfreth’s Alley is also low key street you can take yourself on a tour of, Betsy Ross House and Ben Franklin’s grave are also nearby, easy to see while in Old City.

        • Is there a good place to park him at the Terminal Mkt to people-watch and maybe have a drink while I run around and occasionally drop off purchases?

          • The cooking classes moved across the street (it’s called La Cucina at the Market) but there is a bar/restaurant in the back that’s open on three sides, so you’re still part of the bustle of the market.

          • Literally anywhere. There’s a biergarten in the back. I don’t think you are going to find the kind of hotel you are looking for in Center City. Most are business hotels or cater to tourists looking to see the city, not relax in the hotel. Stay near Rittenhouse or the Art Museum and let him putter around the neighborhood while you go do things. If Philly is good for one thing, it’s weirdo – I mean people – watching.

          • Self included in the weirdo column :)

      • Anonymous :

        I stayed in a hotel just a couple of blocks from the Liberty Hall and various other sites. I’m a semi-veg, and here’s what I enjoyed: Going into the hall *next* to the Liberty Hall and just hanging around imagining what the history would have been like. It was nearly deserted (all the tourists were next door), and quiet. Wandering around the Jewish cemetery. Visiting the hospital and operating theater (oldest in the US), wandering around the parks and squares and churches and ships moored at the river. I walked to most of it from the hotel, and stayed far, far away from the crowds of tourists at the mint and liberty bell.

  10. London, Virginia, and now San Francisco. Just reading the news and feeling horribly helpless today.

    • Senior Attorney :

      This might help a tiny bit: https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/right-turn/wp/2017/06/14/i-choose-not-to-be-outraged/?hpid=hp_no-name_opinion-card-e%3Ahomepage%2Fstory&utm_term=.dbc6dea1258e

  11. Journelle :

    Have any of you bought items from Journelle or any other online lingerie company (Third Love, etc)? I saw some things I liked but I’m skeptical of buying that type of stuff online (bras in particular) without seeing in person first. Also the Third Love bras are so pricey but I got a try on coming in the mail soon to see what the hoopla is all about, maybe its worth it?

    • Marshmallow :

      I have purchased from Journelle in person and Lively online, and had positive experiences with both. No experience with Third Love. My biggest recommendation is to make sure you are comfortable with the return policy so you can order multiple sizes and return the rest.

    • cat socks :

      Cap Hill Style posted a review on Third Love. Haven’t tried them myself b/c I want to go through the Reddit A Bra that Fits calculator and figure out my correct size first.

      • I bought a ThirdLove br* based on Cap Hill Style’s rec. I was really pleased, even though they’re about 3x what I normally spend.

    • Anonymous :

      I’ve been getting stuff from True&Co for the past couple years. Their Gramercy [email protected] are some of my favorite.

    • I’ve become an online convert because of these companies! I now have 3 from Third Love and love them. I had to return an item and even though it was outside their regular return policy, they still gave me a store credit. I also love my Lively one that has the hook in the back to easily convert it into racerback. I bought some stuff from True and Co and had to return it because it was too small, but the return was easy.

    • GirlFriday :

      I tried Th1rd Love once when all my bras were trashed and really didn’t think it was worth the money. The material was thin, it was an odd shape (like a strapless bra but with straps that were sewn on), and it came out of the first wash looking like h3ll. It seemed like a Kohl’s quality bra at Nordstrom’s price. To be fair, I don’t baby my bras – it went in the wash on cold water, gentle cycle, normal detergent, then air dried. I’m a 32DDD or DD, depending on the brand. I’ve been wearing Chantelle bras for several years and just went back to buying those since I know my size and they’re comparable in price.

    • Wildkitten :

      I love Call Your Girlfriend and want to support them by buying things, but haven’t yet.

  12. Great summer suit.

  13. Side Hustle :

    Do any lawyers here have a side hustle? I’m looking for something I can do on nights and weekends to help pay down my loans.

    • Never too many shoes... :

      I get a bonus for going over my yearly money target so my side hustle is, sadly, just billing more hours at my job…

    • Anonymous :

      I made decent money teaching LSAT courses in law school. I did it about 15-20 hours per week and I think I got something like $30/hour so it basically covered my living expenses and meant I only had to take out loans for tuition, not room and board.

    • I teach yoga. It’s not a ton of money, but it’s my walking around money/extra money toward loans/retirement money.

      • Can you tell more about this? I have thought about taking the teacher training. About how much do you make per class?

    • Anonymous :

      In many of my prior jobs, it is expressly not allowed. You might want to check (even quietly) before proceeding.

      • I’m trying to figure out the same for a potential side gig and trying to understand why it wouldn’t be allowed as long as it doesn’t interfere with my performance at my full-time job. To me, it’d be doing a hobby I already do a lot anyway, but finally being able to cover the cost of the materials I use to do it.

        • If anyone has a script for how to ask this question discreetly, that would be much appreciated!

          • How about something to HR that’s more conversational, like “A friend at a firm in [another state] mentioned the other day that her firm doesn’t allow anyone to moonlight/work a 2nd job/freelance/whatever and I promised I’d check and see if this is pretty universal or if maybe it’s specific to her firm/state/etc.”

          • @anon No need to be so secretive about it. Just ask if there’s a policy.

          • New Tampanian :

            Check your handbook

        • Senior Attorney :

          I used to teach karate classes on the side. Not much money but I got my own training free plus a discount on uniforms and equipment. Never even thought about it being a problem with the firm.

          I can see how there might be an issue if it were even tangentially related to the firm’s business.

      • I had to run my adjunct teaching position through our company conflicts/ethics system, and even though I am not an attorney for the company. It was fine, but I still had to go through the formal procedure.

        That said, I don’t recommend being an adjunct as a profitable side hustle! LOL

      • Anon for this :

        My understanding (not legal advice, check your local laws, etc.) is that California does not allow employers to forbid side jobs, so long as they do not interfere with work and are not a conflict. Cal. Labor Code section 96(k) addresses this.

      • Anonymous :

        This is so female asking permission for everything. Would a man ask in advance? Just go for it if you need to do it.

    • Anonymous :

      A friend quilts as a hobby so she started making memory quilts from baby clothes as a side hustle. Another friend does some photography on the side – has a small set up in her basement and does mostly kid portraits. If I found the time, I’d start teach swimming again. Do you have any hobbies that you could turn into a side hustle? These seem to be most effective because they can be increased or cut back if work hours increase/decrease.

      • Never too many shoes... :

        Does she sell them? have wanted a quilt like this for ages but have not been able to find someone.

        • Rainbow Hair :

          Same, I’ve been thinking about this – are you comfortable linking to your friend’s etsy shop or whatever she uses?

        • Shenandoah :

          I’m not the Anonymous poster above but my best friend makes quilts, including baby quilts. She could definitely make a memory quilt from baby clothes. She’s mostly been making quilts for friends and family but just started an Etsy page: etsydotcom/shop/AbbyKirkmanQuilts, so feel free to reach out to her there.

      • Anonymous :

        She does do them as a side business but we’re in a small Canadian city so it wouldn’t like be local/worth shopping items to her – try googling of fb searching for baby memory quilt or similar and there should be results for your city

    • Triangle Pose :

      I airbnb the third bedroom room in our house. My SO and I are both in-house lawyers and we already used airbnb all the time as travelers and always had great experiences. When SO and I were long distance I airbnb’d my place when I visited him every other weekend. We love doing it – meet interesting people, show them our city, and given demand and our location, super easy to make sizable income from it. I’ve also started getting involved with airbnb groups in our city – we have an airbnb meetup group and it’s nice to socialize with folks outside of lawyer groups, friends from school, and trade tips on maximizing our airbnb listings, how to handle taxes, occupancy trends we see, etc.. We’ve been steadily raising the price after getting a book of 5 star reviews under our belt. It’s fun for us and I find it makes us keep our home cleaner and more presentable – since cleaning and organizing is part of our side hustle and contributes to the mortgage, it’s much easier to make sure it gets done (and cover cleaning costs out of the airbnb income) without any griping.

    • Sort of accidentally. I refinanced my loans through SoFi and was super happy with it. I started telling people about it in real life and online. They have a referral program. I started making some money back with that. Then I made enough that they “promoted” me and I get a larger referral now. Some wise folks here suggested I create a blog with the info and then people can get to my referral link from that blog (since the link kept changing). I did that and keep the blog link in my sig on various profiles I have. Over a couple years I’ve made $10k which helped me pay my loans off much faster.

    • I have a photography business (this will probably out me, so hi friends on here). I didn’t have time for it at a firm, but in-house it’s been great & the work is naturally on the weekends so it doesn’t interfere with my real job. I love having a creative outlet that’s totally different from my day job, and it’s made me a better lawyer because I have to understand all the aspects of running a business (albeit a little one) that aren’t creative or glamorous.

    • Green Hat :

      I used to dog sit via rover.com. You can also do dog-walking and in-home sitting too if your residence won’t allow you to host dogs.

    • I am hopeful that after a couple episodes I’ll be able to get a few advertisers. That’ll be my hustle. :-) Oh and maybe some affiliate links or something on the pod website. not sure about that yet.

  14. Brooklyn? :

    I’ve been to NYC too many times to count, but rarely venture out to Brooklyn. I’m going to be in NYC again this November and would love some ideas for venturing out to Brooklyn. I’m mostly interested in fun places to eat (no strong food preferences), bars, and people watching, but would appreciate basically any tips.

    • Brooklynite :

      Activities:

      1. Brooklyn Bridge Park / Brooklyn Heights Promenade / Dumbo. Great for people watching and strolling. Gorgeous views. Can sit here for hours or just do a 30-minute stroll through. Grab pizza afterwards at Grimaldi’s or Julianna’s in Dumbo, or hit up Westville in Dumbo for some healthier options.

      2. Prospect Park / area museums. Prospect Park is huge – think Central Park without the tourists. Great place to sit out and spend an afternoon. Nearby (basically IN the park) is the Brooklyn Botanic Garden, which is fantastic. Also nearby is the Brooklyn Museum, which is excellent as well (and very manageable to do in a couple of hours.

      3. Gowanus. This area will give you a glimpse of Brooklyn gentrification – it’s kind of ongoing here. The Whole Foods is a surprisingly cool place to grab a beer and a bite to eat – it has a rooftop bar over the Gowanus Canal. Nearby is the Royal Palms Shuffleboard Club, which is lots of fun, and Ample Hills for ice cream (yum).

      4. The transit museum in Brooklyn Heights/Downtown Brooklyn is pretty cool. Walks through the history of the NYC transit system, and the basement has a bunch of old trains with their original ads.

      5. If you are up for venturing further afield, Coney Island / Brighton Beach for the beach, aquarium, amusement park (kind of old/depressing but some people are into it), and Russian food.

      Some favorite bars/restaurants to check out: La Vara (Cobble Hill – Spanish/Jewish fusion), Elsa (Cobble Hill – cocktail bar), Westville (Dumbo – clean, seasonal American), Defonte’s Sandwiches (Red Hook, closed Sundays), Roberta’s pizza (Bushwick), Brooklyn Farmacy (Carroll Gardens – old school soda fountain with amazing sundaes), Gold Star Beer Counter (Prospect Heights), Lucali (Carroll Gardens – pizza/calzones)

      Staying in Downtown Brooklyn makes a lot of sense from a transit perspective, but it isn’t the coolest / most “Brooklyn” neighborhood. You could also try to snag an airbnb in Boerum Hill or Cobble Hill – both are more neighborhoody and have good access to the F/G.

      I’ve left Williamsburg/Greenpoint largely off this list and would not advocate staying in either neighborhood if you want to get a taste of “Brooklyn” because they are kind of disconnected from the rest of the borough. Both have plentiful food and bar options, though.

      • Brooklyn? :

        This is great. Thank you!

      • Rainbow Hair :

        Coney Island is my faaaavorite. But I’m really into that whole old-timey circus/fair aesthetic. There’s a burlesque show and a freak show, the scariest roller coaster ever, the wonder wheel, a boardwalk, nathan’s hotdogs… You can get great thingies at the Russian bakeries – would be helpful if I knew what they were called but like basically Russian empanadas? some kind of hand pie? A+

      • Anon in NYC :

        I’ll add in a few Prospect Heights recommendations – Olmstead (need a reservation), and James (small neighborhood place) for food. Sweet Polly for cocktails. Easy to get to/from because they’re near the Barclays Center – a good stop after spending some time in Prospect Park.

        In Clinton Hill there is Emily (pizza) that is supposed to be really good pizza. They also have Emmy Squared in Williamsburg.

        In the general vicinity of downtown Brooklyn (very close to Cobble Hill) is French Louie, which is a cute French bistro. Not far from there is Sottocasa Pizza – I haven’t tried this location, but I’ve been to the one in Williamsburg, which was great.

    • Astoria!

      Get off on Broadway (only 2 or 3 stops from Manhattan off the N/Q line) and lunch or brunch at Sanford’s, then walk along Broadway to check out local markets and shops. Go to the Museum of the Moving Image for a really great and do-able museum (probably 2 hrs for a visit unless you see a film while there), then hit Cafe Bar for a snack or drink after, then stop and get some epic epic dessert at Omonia Cafe on the way back to the subway. If you want to walk around more, you can take the subway to the last stop in Astoria and visit the park there, with great city views! Super fun day, or afternoon trip, easy to access, super amazing food!

      • I love Astoria… in case it’s not obvious that this is in Queens, not Brooklyn. I’m a huge Queens booster – just wanted to avoid confusion by mentioning that.

  15. Help direct me.... :

    Work tops advice?

    Looking for better quality tops for work. Willing to pay more for something that lasts that can be a work-horse I wear once a week. I wear mostly pants, rarely skirts.

    I do not wear much jewelry/scarves etc.. because of my type of job (and style preferences). I like a simple, monochromatic or white/black top, well made, comfortable, and machine washable. Style wise, 3/4 sleeves, short or sleeveless. I love an interesting detail, usually at the neckline. No button downs. A little structure is nice.

    My current unicorn top that works best is a v-neck faux wrap with 3/4 sleeves that I can wear year-round. I have a classique entier top like this that I found in a resale shop (!) that I literally wear once a week.

    I would go to MM Lafleur right now and can find what I want, except the price is too high. Willing to wait and stalk until things go on sale, wherever….

    • Maddie Ross :

      I don’t know that they are the quality level you’re looking for, but my favorite work tops like that are from Uniqlo.

      • I love the Uniqlo work shirts. I stocked up and bought the drape crewneck in every color and some of the ribbed 3/4 sleeves. LOVE them.

    • TO Lawyer :

      Aritzia has some blouses that may fit your bill (although they also have a lot of non-work clothes and the models are sometimes in weird positions). That said, I have some silk blouses from there that have lasted years.

    • Never too many shoes... :

      Up until your last para I was like MMLafleur Deneuve… That top is $145 and you said it was too much, so what price range are you thinking of?

      • Legally Brunette :

        Exactly!! That’s just what I was about to say until I read the last paragraph. I know $145 is pricey but for the cost per wear it could be worth it.

        You might also try Boden or else stalk ThredUp or Ebay for old Classiques Entier styles (current styles are pretty billowy).

    • Cuyana silk tees. They run a half size smaller than I’d expect- and theyre spendy but my cost per wear is crazy low. For me, they are less memorable than the deneuve mm top. I’m obsessed.

    • Ann Taylor’s polyester/spandex jersey-type tops have filled this need for me. They typically come in somewhat staid styles with one interesting detail–like a perfectly draped faux wrap neckline, for instance–and all manner of sleeve lengths and colors (solid and the occasional pattern). Their light colors are opaque enough (praise the lord!) and they all wash really really well. I’ve always gotten them on sale for anywhere from $19.99-$30, but they retail around 59-79. Look great with pants and skirts, or under suits.

      • Country Biscuits :

        This is my go-to also. Less so these days now that flowy/drapey/big sleeves/cold shoulder is in.

      • Anonymous :

        I just bought a mixed-media (?) shell from AT. Boring, but comes in 4 colors and works great under a blazer/suit jacket. Machine washable, comfy. I promptly bought another 5.

    • JuniorMinion :

      What about calvin klein sleeveless knit shells?

      http://www.lordandtaylor.com/main/ProductDetail.jsp?PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524442300926&site_refer=CSE_GGLPRADS001_LT&gclid=CKzBsIqavtQCFYkBaQodhMUOZA&gclsrc=aw.ds

      I tried a white one on in Macy’s (sadly not the right size for me) the other day and it was not see through. I have them in black and some other solid colors and they wash well / look polished and not revealing for work.

      I also find the pleating at the neck to be very flattering, especially for my larger chested self.

    • I love ebay for stuff like this. You have a top that you know is your magical unicorn top and you really just want it in other colors. You could spend a lot of money trying to find a similar top that is close, but it’s not going to make you happy. Just go on eBay and buy the exact top.

      I don’t know which exact top you have, but I just searched for Classiques Entier wrap on eBay and got lots of hits for wrap dresses (one of which I now want!) and wrap tops. Most are $15 or $20.

  16. Anonymous :

    For the first time in my life, I’ve stuck with an exercise plan consistently: 1.5 hour hatha yoga classes 2 or 3 times a week for about 6 months now. Problem is, instead of the energy boost I was hoping for, I’m tired all the time. I was already on a strict 8hrs a night schedule, and now I still have a sleep debt I have to make up in naps or weekends, otherwise I’m completely wasted.
    Is this normal? I wasn’t surprised during the initial adjustment period, but nothing has improved. I don’t have time for the work out commitment and the extra sleep!

    • Anonymous :

      1.) Get your thyroid, iron levels, and vitamin D checked.
      2.) Drink tons of water.
      3.) Try to eat healthier foods.
      4.) Maybe try an anti-depressant (mostly joking)

    • If by hatha yoga, you mean unheated, mostly stretchy (not tons of sun salutations/vinyasa style classes), then I’m a little surprised.

      Are you doing lots of bodyweight strength work in your hatha class? Is it typically slower or faster paced?

      I teach and take yoga, and find that I do need more sleep when I’m doing more strength-based exercises, or when my workout is actually physically exhausting. If I take a class or do a home practice that focuses more on stretching, not so much.

      • Anonymous :

        The thermostat does go up, usually to 80 or 90 F. Does that make a big difference?

        • Anon in NYC :

          The heat could make you more dehydrated than you think. Dehydration makes me really tired/foggy.

  17. Bank robber :

    Posted a few weeks ago about how I accidentally double-presented a check. Once on my phone into bank A and then at an ATM at bank B. I realized immediately, called the second bank and they said it would be fixed in a few days, with a small fee. It hasn’t. This was over a month ago.

    The check was from my husband, who then realized it had been withdrawn from his account twice. He called his bank (bank C) and they “replaced the funds.” This was ten days ago. He got a letter that the funds were replaced and they’re back in his account. It still has not been taken from my checking account and my bank still says the check has cleared. I asked them to send me stuff in writing, they haven’t yet. I went to a branch and they said this was a back-office problem they couldn’t resolve.

    It’s 3k so not exactly chump change. I’m worried I’m going to be arrested for fraud or something. And I hate having 3k extra in my checking account – it makes it confusing for whether or not I’ll overdraw. Will this end up being taken from my account in a quarterly review or something? Will they never take it and I’ve essentially stolen several thousand from a bank? Is there anything I can do??

    • That really sucks and I think you have every reason to be pissed at your bank for taking so g d long to fix this problem. That said, I would stop worrying about it (and don’t spend the money, of course!). Your husband’s bank has a pretty good incentive to try to get this worked out. I bet it will happen eventually.

    • Anonymous BigLaw Associate :

      I’d keep track of all your communications, just in case. Although I agree this will eventually get resolved, but I would also keep pestering them about it.

    • Anonymous :

      I would keep meticulous records of your conversations and attempts to fix this. I would also clearly keep the money set aside. Fraud (and most other financial-type crime) requires the intent to defraud and by asking the bank to fix it and not spending the money I think you can show you did not have the intent to defraud.

    • I would send a certified letter to the bank’s customer service address detailing the issue and your attempts to resolve it. Then don’t worry about it.

      If you don’t want to go to the hassle of a certified letter, any paper trail through email or customer service messages would probably help set your mind at ease as well. If you jotted down times/dates/names for any phone conversations, that would be helpful as well.

    • Senior Attorney :

      It’s super annoying, of course, but honestly there is pretty much zero chance of you being arrested for a crime. And the way you are framing it in your head is honestly a teeny bit odd. You haven’t stolen anything, for heaven’s sake!

      That said, it seems like doing as LAnon suggests might help ease your mind a bit.

  18. My face lotion says “Please recycle” but it doesn’t have a recycling logo with a number on it. Do you think that means it’s recyclable? It’s in a squeeze tube sort of thing like face wash. Usually those aren’t recyclable, and the ambiguity is making me really second guess it! (It’s embarrassing the amount of time I’ve spent thinking about this, but I’ve become super anti-plastic).

    • I hate it when there’s either no number or it’s so tiny that it’s impossible to read. I’m also super anti-plastic, but where I live they recycle only numbers 1 and 2, so there’s a lot of stuff I have to resign myself to throwing away.

    • Professor :

      Plastic recycling is frustrating- most plastic is theoretically recyclable, but it’s hard to make it work economically because it’s so hard to collect and sort the many types. Even plastics with the same number can’t necessarily be recycled together because they have different additives and it’s pretty rare that any of it gets turned back into a similar grade of product (“downcycling”). If you live somewhere that only takes 1 and 2, I wouldn’t put it in. If they take most types, you might as well throw it in, since they clearly have the capacity to efficiently sort. Just because they take all the types doesn’t mean they actually recycle them all the time, but you’re unlikely to harm the quality of recycled product, which can be a problem if the program is only designed to deal with certain types of plastic. I go to great lengths to make sure metal, glass, and paper get recycled, but I don’t worry that much about weird plastics, since the environmental benefits are a lot more marginal.

  19. Anyone here into “Mindfulness”?

    A family member has been going through some ups and downs and also has a birthday coming up. I was thinking about buying him a subscription to a class that teaches mindfulness techniques. I think he would be into it, as he has been experimenting with things to help his anxiety while he is trying to avoid medications. He has gotten back into exercising and hobbies, and I think mindfulness teaching would help.

    Is there a ?book/reference/something that is classic that you might have used or like that I could pick up for him (hopefully on 2 day shipping Amazon!) that I could give him in combination with a gift certificate?

    I’m also going to put together for him a comfort kit that he can take on work travel, as he always tends to forget something when he travels. It would include things like a sleep mask, ear plugs, small case for meds etc… and if there are any key things that you think a guy might also appreciate in such a travel pack, would appreciate advice for that as well.

    TIA!

    • I really like the book Wherever You Go There You Are. I think it’s a classic in the genre. I’ve also heard good things about Peace is Every Step, but I haven’t read it yet. Also I like the Headspace app and I think there are one or two books written by the Headspace founder.

    • What about a headspace subscription?

    • Anonymous :

      I am just getting into mindfulness because my anxiety is getting out of control. A few weeks in, and I’m hooked. I’ve been using the headspace app. There’s a free trial and then you can pay for a monthly or annual subscription. I haven’t read any mindfulness books yet, but I’ve heard good things about Mindfulness in Plain English.

    • Yes! I definitely recommend the Miracle of Mindfulness or anything else by Thich Nhat Hanh. It’s such a simple read and suddenly you are practicing mindfulness by just reading it. Another good one, but bigger, is Full Catastrophe Living (Jon Kabat Zinn) and if he is into sports, Sacred Hoops by Phil Jackson, which is awesome! Mindfulness is great for leveling out, allowing you to be more resilient during lows and fully aware and appreciative of the joys.

    • Dr. Amit Sood wrote a couple of about this, including the Guide to Stress Free Living.

  20. Has anyone shopped from Grana before and can speak to their experience in terms of quality and shipping?

    • Country Biscuits :

      I saw a few bad reviews on MUA; you might look there.

    • Anonymous :

      I bought a silk/cashmere sweater from there that I love. Shipping is super fast to US, and return shipping is easy too. They give you a DHL label and I think you can arrange for a pickup but I just dropped it at a local shipping place.

    • IP Associate :

      I have a silk dress and camisole from Grana and love both. The camisole and dress are both lined in silk (!) and was incredibly inexpensive compared to similar tops I’ve found elsewhere. Shipping was fast – I didn’t have any issues and will likely order from them again when I need something else.

    • Min Donner :

      The blog looksgoodfromtheback reviewed a few Grana pieces a while back, and I recall that she quite liked them.

  21. Calibrachoa :

    Okay so posting again so it won’t hide in the misplaced nesting comment…

    Ladies, any suggestions for a hotel in Chicago? I’ve never been and neither has my girlfriend, but we’re staying there for a few days before I fly home. We don’t have any concrete plans other than going to the Fields museum to say hi to Sue the T-Rex, and since I will be between paychecks due to switching jobs we’re hoping to keep it budget-friendly while still cute and romantic. Parking is a necessity

    • Anonymous :

      We stayed in the Kimpton Gray last time we were there. It was affordable for Chicago, and clean and comfortable and decently located (West Loop) although not super convenient to the Field Museum. Not super fancy or romantic, but good for the price point. Not sure what your budget is, but it’s a struggle just to find clean, safe hotels in Chicago under $200. Parking will be $50+ night if you go through a hotel, you can do a little better in a garage but not that much.

      • Calibrachoa :

        Thanks! Hoping to keep it under $150 a night, but would go higher for the right place.

    • Palmer House Hilton is pretty good. The neighborhood around it seemed better last year than it had been the previous times I was there. The art museum is like 2 blocks away and I had a fantastic breakfast at a place called Peach across the street. Not on the Magnificent Mile, but multiple El stops are around it.

    • frustrated academic :

      Try an airbnb that is outside the loop and close to an el line. Those will be in your price range and generally have parking.

      • Anonymous :

        Chicago is cracking down on regulating airbnb, so many are coming off the market – or may drop a reservation if you make one. I’d probably go with a hotel in the interim, until that market levels off.

        Signed, someone who had an AirBnB reservation for July that got cancelled

        • Anon in NYC :

          This happened to me in Baltimore – 3 days before the reservation, and on what appeared to be graduation weekend for all area colleges. Finding a hotel was brutal.

      • Rainbow Hair :

        I agree with this suggestion. A bunch of possibilities pop up when I search for AirBnBs in Andersonville, my old ‘hood. Alternatively, check and see if you can get in at Longman and Eagle. They book up in advance, but the price is right and the location is great.

        Aaaah can I give you some unsolicited Chicago suggestions?

        Hopleaf if you like beer. It’s a lovely Belgian-focused bar/restaurant. Killer food, great beer, perfect bartenders. But try to go early or on a weeknight, because it does get packed. OH and then afterward you can walk a few blocks north on Clark to get ice cream from George’s for maximum romance.

        If the weather will be decent, definitely plan to stroll along the lake! When you’re finished with the Field Museum you’ll be right there!

        The Architectural Boat Tour sounds silly but it is so great! So fun to ride in a boat and look at the skyscrapers! (Just do the one that goes on the river, the lake is skippable.)

        The Chicago Cultural Center is in the middle of everything, is free, and has two Tiffany glass ceilings and often really cool art exhibitions.

        I’m jealous. Chicago is the best.

        • Calibrachoa :

          Thanks! :D We totally welcome any and all recommendations because, well, I’ve never been to Chicago and have no idea what i want to see other than Sue XD

    • Chicago Bean Accounter :

      I’d honestly check on Expedia, Priceline, Travelocity, etc. It’s pretty hard to be under $150 for just the room, and then adding parking on top of that. I’ve read that parking at the Hyatt Regency McCormick Place is $36 for 24 hours if you do self park, and it’s not too far of a walk from there to the Green Line and it’s close to museum campus.

      I have read that the Chicago South Loop Hotel has free parking and I’ve driven by the hotel, but the area can feel iffy to some. Public transportation by that hotel is buses vs trains as well.

      • Calibrachoa :

        Thanks! I admit I am way too used to traveling solo and staying in BnBs so I was being a bit too optimistic about how much this would work out to be. I am just a bit worried going through those sites that i end up getting us a reservation somewhere that’s inconvenient or otherwise a bad idea due to how unfamiliar I am with chicago.

        • Chicago Bean Accounter :

          Just a few more tidbits that may help – if you stay in the Loop proper or in Streeterville/River North, you will likely have to do valet for your car. Most of the hotels in these areas don’t have self park options. Proximity to the L lines can be really beneficial, especially if you plan to venture into any neighborhoods.

          For things to do – venture into the neighborhoods! There’s GREAT stuff in so many of them. Also seconding all of the recs Rainbow Hair mentions above. Even locals love the architectural tour. A couple other ice cream places that are great are Margie Candies (2 locations) and Cone Chicago. All the museums are great, and there are tons of street fests and art shows in Chicago during the summer months.

          • Rainbow Hair :

            Yes! Explore the neighborhoods. I swear I’ll stop talking about beer after this but I love Begyle and there’s cute stuff to see around there (Lill St. Art Center has a cafe with pie!) and also Revolution (which is close to Longman and Eagle, and also a bunch of fun stuff in Logan Square).

    • check jetsetter.com for some deals! or hoteltonight.com

  22. Silicon Valley Hotels :

    I travel to Silicon Valley (Mr. View in particular) on a regular basis. I of course understand hotels are just insanely expensive and not very luxurious unless you spend a lot. But was wondering if you ladies have any favorites.

    • Silicon Valley Hotels :

      *Mt. View

    • Anonymous :

      Four Seasons Silicon Valley in east Palo Alto isn’t super fancy for a Four Seasons, but I love it. The service is impeccable and they have a nice pool area with cabanas. A lot of people are gaga over the Garden Court Hotel in PA, which is at a similar price point. The Garden Court definitely has more of a boutique feel vs a cookie-cutter upscale business hotel, but I like the Four Seasons better. If you want to spend a lot of time in downtown PA, Garden Court is a good option, since it’s right in downtown and the Four Seasons is in an office park right off the freeway.

      • Anonymous :

        Garden Court means, assuming you’re driving, you’re dealing with the huge backup on University to 101 every day. Definitely Four Seasons over Garden Court if you’re driving to MV. Garden Court would be great if you take Caltrain.

        • This is only if you don’t know the shortcuts to get from downtown to Oregon Expressway, which is much faster and shorter if you are heading to Mountain View anyway. Also, it is likely that taking Alma is faster than 101 at rush hour anyway, FYI.

    • The Hampton Inn just outside downtown MV is pretty decent (especially considering it’s a Hampton Inn). Definitely not as full service as the Four Seasons, but very clean with friendly staff.

    • Anonymous :

      We live in MV. My inlaws like Dinah’s Garden Hotel in PA.

      • Anonymous :

        My in-laws have also stayed there, but they hated it and I wasn’t very impressed when we visited.

    • Silicon Valley Hotels :

      Thanks all. I should have said that I was trying to keep the price fairly reasonable, i.e. less than 500 a night, and I will be driving on my trips. I have stayed at the Four Seasons and like it, but it is typically more than that. I have been staying at things like the various Alofts-particularly like the one in Sunnyvale. I have SPG status, so it is nice to get upgrades and collect points, but not a necessity if there is something better.

      I stayed at Dinah’s before after my assistant recommended it, but my room was really dirty, so I am turned off to that. I honestly never thought about looking at the Hampton Inn, although one of my coworkers has stayed there before and he also said it was fine and convenient to our office.

      But this thread is just confirming my suspicion that there are no “awesome” reasonably priced options.

      • Anonymous :

        Wow, it must have gone up a lot then. I stayed there a couple of years ago for $220. I agree it’s not worth $500+.

      • Anonymous :

        Yikes, when did you stay there when it was dirty? I feel like my 5-star-preferred MIL would have complained to me loudly and often if that was her experience, but it is *possible* she was being polite… She stayed there in 2016.

        • Silicon Valley Hotels :

          This was 2016 as well. It wasn’t filthy, but the carpet was in desperate need of cleaning, the towels were rough, and there were some errant hairs. Nothing egregious, and if I was paying $200 instead of $400, maybe I wouldn’t be complaining. At that price tag, it shouldn’t be dirty at all.

    • I stayed at a Residence Inn in Los Altos and it was decent. Plus you get a full kitchen.

    • Dinah’s Garden Hotel! It’s the best. I love it so.

      I never stay there really because I live in the area, but my sister comes in from Austin and stays there for work, and we hang out at the pool. I wish I could to it more often.

    • Enchante in Los Altos is a small hotel, if you like a boutique vibe.

      The JDV group also has a modern place in Palo Alto, if you like a more hipster feel.

  23. D.C. Question :

    Can anyone recommend a hotel that is convenient to the National Press Club in D.C.? (For a work conference.) I’m not familiar with D.C. at all and am super excited to spend a few days there. If I have one free day and want to visit one museum – which one would you go to? (I realize it’s completely subjective, just looking for ideas!)

    Also, can I say that at this very minute I love my job – my bosses have been pulling for me to go to this very selective and high profile conference and they’re paying for it (they are total cheapskates). They really want me to go and to become more visible in my industry. I have moments when I feel like my career is completely stagnant, and then something like this come along and now my motivation is skyrocketing.

    • Anonymous :

      The W; the Intercontinental and the JW Marriott are all on that block and/or across the street from that block.

    • Never too many shoes... :

      If I had just one day, I love the Newseum. I spent four and a half hours there last time and it was not enough to get through all the floors. But I do not care about space exploration at all – if that is your thing though, Smithsonian for sure.

      • Anonymous :

        Yeah, cause the Smithsonian is just the Air and Space museum…

        • There was no need to be snarky. She was saying a lot of people like space exploration, and if the OP does, she should check out that Smithsonian. Post something helpful, or be quiet, but there is no need for “oh duh huh don’t you know there’s more than one Smithsonian!” You are rude.

          • Anonymous :

            It was unnecessarily snarky, but Never too many shoes’s comment strongly implied that the only reason to go to the Smithsonian is if you like space, which is kind of a ridiculous thing to say.

          • Never too many shoes... :

            Thanks for the support. I meant *that* branch, if the OP was into that.

      • Delta Dawn :

        Agree about Newseum– it is my favorite. Followed by the Spy Museum, which is cheesy, but I love it. But, if you have never been to DC, I would pick one of the classics. My favorite Smithsonian is American History. It has the star spangled banner and Dorothy’s ruby slippers from the movie. A lot of people like Air and Space, which is my second favorite Smithsonian. You could also make a quick stop in the National Gallery– you will probably be close to it at some point if you want to see the Capitol, and it’s free and easy to get into/out of. You could duck in and see the Van Gogh/Renoir paintings (they are together) and then leave.

    • On the museum front, it matters so much what you enjoy and/or have visited before. I’m not big into art museums, so I would skip those. Personally, I would do the American History Museum or the National History Museum. If into news/international affairs, I also like the Newseum – but be worried that it’s expensive for a museum, especially in a city where many are free. If into spy things, the Spy Museum is also good, but again expensive.

    • I would tour the bureau of engraving and printing (free but you have to make a reservation) – you get to see money being made which I just think is so cool (total nerd). I think it’s only like an hour or so. And I would pair that with the museum of natural history (because that’s my jam). My mom’s favorite is the American History – she likes seeing all the first ladies’ dresses. I hear the building museum is neat too, but I haven’t been.

    • As far as museums go, I really enjoy the National Gallery of Art. Of course the hottest museum in DC right now is the museum of African American history– I have not made it there yet but I hear it’s great!

      Also I wanted to point out that there are so many Smithsonian museums close together and free of charge around the National Mall that you probably don’t need to pick just one. Pop in and out of a few if you like :)

    • I like Hotel Monaco. It’s about 4 blocks away from the press club and an easy walk. I’d try to get tickets to the African American History museum.

    • Anonymous :

      Corcoran Gallery of Art. It’s not free admission like the Smithsonian art museums, so it’s less crowded. Stellar collection, too. The Smithsonian’s Renwick Gallery is a wonderful small museum of folk and modern art tucked away behind the White House, also much quieter than the bigger museums​. The Smithsonian is a phenomenal cultural treasure, but, oh, the crowds… I wouldn’t go there in the high tourist season for anything.

    • Amelia Bedelia :

      If you have never visited DC, I highly recommend the National Archives. See our important founding documents and then the informational exhibit on the archives and what they have from 200 years of our country. SO fascinating. I love it.

  24. Father's Day HALP :

    I am stumped this year.

    My dad doesn’t play golf and is trying to downsize his possessions. He likes history but has read pretty much everything not published within the last ten years. He doesn’t play golf and isn’t interested in sports.

    Similarly stumped for my husband.

    Anyone have any great ideas?

    • Anonymous BigLaw Associate :

      Consumables may be the way to go. I have been getting the Harry and David pears for my husband for years for birthday/father’s day.

      • Yep. Just like flowers are ubiquitous for Mothers Day, edibles have become ubiquitous for Fathers Day. We’re a nation that now buys whatever we want as soon as we want it, and simultaneously all want to downsize our “stuff” – gift giving has gotten pretty much impossible. Generic consumables (or experiences) are the way to go.

    • Anonymous :

      Are you local? I switched to experience gifts for my Dad a couple years ago and it’s been a hit. Usually I buy tickets for him and I to do something together just the two of us. Comedy show, fly fishing film festival (yes that’s a thing), craft beer festival. Sometimes I take him to dinner before hand. I generally get him something small to open on the actual day – so like a 6 pack of craft beer to go with the beer festival tickets or a new fly to go with the fly fishing film fest tickets.

      If he like history, are there any historical museums nearby? Any special exhibits you could get tickets for? Lunch + museum tour?

    • Calibrachoa :

      Museum membership maybe?

    • CD of Churchill or Kennedy speeches (for your Dad). The former was a big hit with my father around the time he was reading Keegan’s biography of Churchill.

    • Netflix subscription? Or if he likes British TV shows, an Acorn subscription (a very hard to shop for grandpa-type in my life raves about his!)?
      A membership to a museum or local historical society?
      Tickets to something? Food of the month type subscription?

      • pugsnbourbon :

        … did not know there was a streaming service for British TV. You have just changed my life.

    • How about an Atlas Obscura book? History inside, easy to read, you guys could spend the day together checking out one or more of the locations, etc. It wouldn’t be clutter, it’d be more of an activity type thing and he could always donate or amazon sell it if he’s done

    • Kind of random, but we just got a record player (Crosley one on Amazon for around $80) & I’m getting one for my Dad for father’s day/his birthday. We have a bunch of old records lying around & you can still buy them pretty easily. I had dinner at a friend’s recently who played albums on a record player & loved the vibe. The player I got is also bluetooth connected, so you can also just use it as a speaker.

    • Anonymous :

      A freshly made batch of Nestle Toll House Choc Chip cookies is perfect. Always appreciated, last for a few days and are a treat for everyone!

    • Anon in NYC :

      I usually take my dad out for brunch. He loves feeding my kid off his plate, and then we get to go to the playground and he can run around with her.

    • Legacybox?

  25. Are any of you runners following the Oiselle / Kelly Roberts controversy? Thoughts?

    • What is the controversy?

      • There are a couple layers IMO . . . I’ll do my best but welcome corrections.

        Kelly Roberts is a blogger who promotes body acceptance and speaks out against body shaming . . . but she got blog famous by “hottie hunting” men while running and posting selfies of them in the background (without permission it seems).

        She became an Oiselle muse/sponsored blogger/runner. She is not an elite runner who is supported by their Volee program.

        It came to light that she banditted races, joined up with people during races, made some statements that those who oppose banditing found to be not cool, she kinda sorta apoloized but it was late.

        Oiselle employees, CEO included, made statements that made it seem like they supported banditing and the CEO referred to her as a pro-athlete. All of this rubbed some peiple the wrong way.

        Oiselle finally clarified that the don’t support banditing and have continued their endorsement and support of Kelly Roberts, however the official statement by the CEO contained a pretty rough statement aimed at another runner who has been very vocal about her criticism of both Kelly and Oiselle and has a zero tolerance policy for cheating. The other runner, Aysha Mirza, had her Volee membership (she paid in I believe) revoked very shortly after expressing her displeasure.

        On my phone so apologies for typos etc

        • Ooh, I had no idea! I have a friend who is very into them, I’ll have to get the scoop! (Personally I like a lot of their stuff but it irks that they only go to a size 12)

        • Seattle Freeze :

          Derek at Marathon Investigation has a decent synopsis of the issue and an update from Oiselle: https://www.marathoninvestigation.com/.

        • I don’t run but I read this trying to understand, and I suspect you’re just making up words Oiselle? Banditing? Volee? Peiple?

          I’m totally kidding, by the way.

          • I had to look that up. Banditing is joining in races that you have not registered for.

    • Here for this discussion :

      as a hobby-jogger with immense respect for the sport and reverence toward races of any kind/level/distance, I think both Oiselle and K.R. are garbage.

      1. Oiselle for boosting this whole – rah-rah women! down with the Nike man! scene and yet being VERY shady about their influencer tactics, advertising, etc. (their clothes don’t go beyond size12? ohhkay Sally…) also because I find many of their runners obnoxious to a fault.

      2. Kelly for blatantly banditing/bib-muling races (still, and with no remorse), running with her face in her phone, and generally being way more obnoxious and flagrant than when she first started. I’ll be honest, when she went viral, I thought it was cute, the men pictures thing was funny (reverse sexism aside yes) and I could relate to her as a fellow hobby-jogger. I don’t know when TF she started blowing up – I’m assuming when she became a social media “influencer”, quit a real job, and created this terrible Oiselle/November Project/Womens Running persona – but now I truly cannot stand her. The fact that she treats races so disrespectfully is the cherry on top for me. I don’t care if it’s a local 5k that your grandma runs, I don’t care if you think big-bad-NYRR makes enough money and your entry fee is a drop in the bucket (because yeah, F NYRR and the highway robbery prices) I think banditing races is bad and any true runner would not do it. Ever. For any reason.

      And the problem is that she keeps showing up! I’d love to ignore her (generally my MO in life) except the popular running community keeps propping her up as some kind of woman hero. ugh!

      • This is pretty much how I feel as well. I wanted to try to present facts and then come back and rage a bit!

        • Here for it :

          Yep, I am here to rage with you. Instagram always promotes her into my feed and it’s annoying. I just don’t know what these companies are getting from her? Obviously I don’t understand social media money economy at all.

          She proclaimed this big life changing ‘ZOMG BQ or bust! I can do it, rah rah woman power in a sportsbra’ manifesto and she continues to blow it in the most predictable and stupid of ways.

          She literally has NO DAY JOB. (so jealous) nothing to do but listen to her running coaches! train smart! Eat well! also, I don’t know jack about BQing (because again slow, fat hobby jogger) but maybe DON’T TRY TO BQ WITH YOUR PHONE IN YOUR GD HAND. ugh.

          • It’s pretty offensive to me for a brand to be all Rah rah! Wooo women!! no body shaming, love who you are!!!!! And then not offer sizes above 12.

      • ponte python's flying circus :

        You’ve summed up how I feel way more succinctly than I would’ve in my ragesplosion. The whole thing aggravates me to no end. Yes, I support the values that Oiselle and Kelly say they are for (body positivity, no speed-shaming, empowering women), BUT I completely and utterly disagree with the way they are going about it.

  26. Are there other bags like the O.G. and O.M.G. that fit over suitcase handles like those do? Particularly any that are cheaper than those bags?

    • Also, Lo & Sons has only ground shipping as an option and I live in Alaska, so that means it’ll take up to two weeks to get it. No, thank you.

    • Rainbow Hair :

      Baggallini – I have the Alberta Travel Tote and I like it! Before that I had the Medium Avenue CHL Tote, I think? Also good! Anyway, they both fit easily onto rolling luggage with that strap thing, and they were like 1/4 the price?

      • Rainbow Hair :

        P.S. Also one of my bags started to fall apart and the company gave me another one for free, so I like ’em a lot!

    • Yeah, a lot of bags on Amazon.

    • Tumi makes most of their travel totes with a pocket that unzips on the bottom and fits over the handle of Tumi (and other) luggage.

    • Victorinox Divinity. (Sorry for being a broken record.) I love mine.

  27. Witching Hour Advice? :

    For those of you with kindergarten-aged kids, what do you with them in those long hours between coming home and their bedtime? I’m home around 5 pm and bedtime is 8 pm. I’m tired and she’s tired and I am not very creative so I’m wondering what others’ schedules look like.

    I usually include her in dinner prep (something quick) but mostly she’s hungry when she gets home from school and has already eaten and we take the dog for a walk. Bedtime routine with books is about 30 mins. So I feel like I have at least 2 hours where I should be doing something. Workbooks? Games?

    How have I gotten this far without having any idea what I’m supposed to be doing? I love her and I am happy to come home but then I feel like “now what?”

    • My kids play, either together or on their own. Usually that happens while I do the dishes or sit down to unwind from work. Sometimes we take them outside, and either walk to the playground, play Pokemon Go, or go get an ice cream or something. About twice a week or so, we throw them in bath, which usually takes 30 minutes (mostly playing in the water). Once a week we have board game night. Other than that, I don’t really ever entertain them, and definitely no worksheets since they get enough of that in school.

      • +1. Mostly play – in my head I sort of think of it as an hour of “downtime” for all of us – coloring, playing, reading for them, and reading/emails/phone games for me. We take ~30 min for dinner. Then another hour of something together before starting the bedtime routine. We rotate through:

        – Evening walk
        – Outside play, like tball or soccer or something
        – Trip to a local park or playground
        – Board games
        – Story telling – we make up stories and tell them to each other, or take turns each telling a “chapter” of a made up story. Sometimes the parents read fairy tales or fables or classics, then have the kids make up their own version of the story.
        – Karaoke through OnDemand
        – Practice night. We’re all trying to learn something. She wants to whistle, he wants to juggle, etc. We practice together and look up YouTube videos and whatnot.
        – Kids Dinner – they plan and cook a dinner every so often. It’s usually things like making sandwiches and pouring the milk, but it takes forever for them to plan and do so it’s usually our activity for the night
        – Travel the World. We plan this in advance, but we pick a country and learn hello/ goodbye/ please/ friend in that language. We watch a YouTube about the country. We (try) to cook/eat something from that country.
        – Dance Party. We play music through Alexa and make up dance moves.
        – And usually every single Friday, we have a movie-and-pizza night.

        We do more of the outside stuff in the Spring & Fall, and more of the inside stuff in the Summer & Winter, but there’s enough on this list to keep it fairly fresh so that we’re all pretty excited to be together.

        • I LOVE the Travel the World idea and am stealing it. I already texted DH about it, and he loves the idea too.

          • Anonymous :

            +1, my kid is obsessed with travel and maps, this sounds like a lot of fun!

        • OCAssociate :

          We do something similar – we ordered paper passports/stamps and a map, then learn about a different country every week. There’s also usually good [country] facts for kids here:
          www.sciencekids.co.nz/sciencefacts/countries

        • Anonymous :

          May I come be in your family?

    • Anonymous :

      Do kids not play outside anymore? I feel like when I was in kindergarten all I did after school was play in the streets with my friends (or go over to their houses in the winter).

      • Not really, no. If you have a fenced-in backyard, maybe. But neither I nor anyone I know would let our kids play in the street now. (Even though we all did it growing up, too.)

    • Anonymous :

      My daughter plays solo most of the time between when we get home and when she goes to bed. Occasionally we’ll do an outing as a family, like to get ice cream or something, but most of the time she is coloring, playing with her stuffed animals, “reading” (she’s four, so it’s not really reading but she flips through books and talks about them), etc.

    • IDK, but my kid is a pro at eating up all the time by dragging out the most mundane tasks. Dad usually picks him up a little after 5 and then they play/putter around the house. Some nights are sports practice night or dinner out night. I show up around 6, start making dinner, sometimes kiddo assists, sometimes he works on reading, sometimes he and the dogs spend the whole time bouncing around the kitchen. We eat dinner as a family, then start the progression upstairs around 7 or 7:15. After shower, teeth, books, random first aid requests that only pop up 2 minute before lights out, it’s 8pm.
      It’s funny how different households work. Those couple of hours are super short in our house and feel like an endless succession of now do this.

    • Anonymous :

      Legos, books, games, play outside. Make them play and work through their boredom–that’s how their minds will engage and enable higher level thinking. It’s good for kids to be bored and overcome it on their own.

    • Rainbow Hair :

      Admittedly kiddo is much younger (2.5ish) but I’ve found that planning activities for that time really takes the stress off me. On Monday we tie dyed (I know! but it went well!) and yesterday we rinsed the tie dyed things and played in the hose. Today we’re swimming. Tomorrow … I haven’t thought out the details yet but I am hoping to do something water color based. Friday we’ll go to the park for music.

      Of course the giant caveat here is that I like planning and doing these kinds of craftsy activities, and I know I have to go with the flow if Kiddo is like “actually can you just pretend to be a sick baby for the next 30 minutes?” …sigh…

    • I was an only child. I remember doing board games and puzzles with my dad, and crafts and art projects with my mom after school at that age. I also had a couple of “activity” nights (one night of gymnastics or dance, which I was terrible at, and one night in the kids’ room at church). We had next-door neighbors with kids, and I played outside with them on the weekends, but I don’t remember playing with them on week nights.

    • I guess I’m a mean mom, but I was a “go play” kind of mom when my kids were that age. They had legos and a play kitchen and plenty of other toys. They could entertain themselves.

      I was usually busy making dinner & washing dishes so I would really just get that last hour of the day with them. That hour was some combination of bath time, reading or even watching TV. My daughter LOVED to watch HGTV at that age. She thought (and still thinks, at age 16!) that home decorating makeovers were magical.

    • Alexisfaye :

      Also, try putting her to bed earlier. I know that sounds awful, like you don’t want to be with her, but my youngest just finished Kinder (she’ll be 7 in November) and she is definitely tired. If I don’t get her down at 7:30ish she’s SUPER cranky the next day… This will give you and her a break.

  28. Anonymous :

    I need some suggestions/advice. I’m currently going through some legal stuff (unemployment hearing) and my manfriend is a lawyer so he’s been helping me write appeal letters and going over trial strategy and will also be sitting in to advise on the actual hearing. Since he’s not being paid, I feel like I owe him *something* as a thank you/token of appreciation for his work and insight and expertise. However I’m unemployed so nothing too terribly expensive. Should I treat him to a nice dinner out? Buy a bottle of wine? Something else??

    • I think, for now, a thank-you card. Later, when you’re back on your feet, a nice bottle of wine.

    • Anonymous :

      Or make him dinner, which is cheaper?

    • Cook him dinner and write him an ego-inflating thank you note. Not sure how serious you are with him, so it can be casual or lovey-dovey, but basically saying that you’re so grateful for all his help and that you’ve loved being able to see a bit into his work world – you’re so impressed with how well he handles all this stuff, you’re amazed at his insight and expertise and couldn’t have done it without him, it’s no wonder his clients love him, etc etc.

      It’s so rare for many people to get to show off their professional expertise in front of their significant other – it always means a lot to me when my boyfriend sees something I’ve worked on and is complimentary.

      • Anonymous :

        Mmmmm normally I would make him dinner, but we trade off on meal responsibilities (he makes approx 3x what I made when I was working, so it helps me feel equal if I contribute something substantial like a meal), and I cook probably 2-3x a week for us, so I feel like me cooking wouldn’t be as “special” as it would be if I never cooked. So maybe I’ll just stick with a nice thank you note and then follow it up with a fancy, special dinner out when I start working again.

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