business lunch

Emergency Reader Mail: What to wear to a lunch with an interviewer?

by C on 01/25/2010 · 61 comments

in Career, Fashion, Interviewing, Networking

We got this request in over the weekend, and had to weigh in…

I’m a 2L in law school and going to a job fair next weekend, where I have a few interviews. Since getting the interviews and I have been in touch with a friend of a friend who is well connected, and who has called one of my interviewers on my behalf. She mentioned that the interviewer would like to go to lunch with me and herself around the date of my interview, so here is my question: if it is the day of my interview, I’ll be in a suit obviously, but if it is before, what would I wear? the lunch would be the first impression, so my instinct would be suit, but that seems formal for a lunch. Thanks for any advice you can give!

Congratulations — this sounds like a great opportunity. We agree that a suit is probably the thing to wear, but thought we’d temper it with a few other thoughts:

  • Where does this job rank on your wishlist? If it’s the number one job you want, bust out your best interview suit. If it’s lower on your wishlist, consider wearing your second-best suit — particularly if the lunch is the day before the job fair (that way, if you spill something on your second-best suit, you still have your power suit to wear to the job fair).
  • Consider the context — how senior is your friend who set up the interview? How senior is her friend, the interviewer? Where are you meeting? The more formal the spot (and, yes, the more senior your companions), wear a suit.  On the other hand, if they’re recent graduates and you’re meeting at a trendy or casual spot, you might want to opt in favor of a more casual suit-like outfit (i.e., blazer, trousers, button-front shirt, etc.).

We would suggest treating this luncheon like the interview — read everything on the company’s web site, and any other materials you can get your hands on.  Hunt online to see what people really think about working at the company — particularly if there’s a swarm of bad reviews, you may want to use this lunch to tactfully ask questions of the interviewer and try to determine the truth of the situation.  (Be warned that it’s generally better to save the  “but how would *I* like the job” questions until after you have the offer in hand — but a few well-worded questions can provide insight.)  At the same time, don’t be afraid to toot your own horn at lunch, and, particularly, to show the personality traits that make you a great employee / team member (or have stories ready to tell that illustrate those traits, should the opportunity arise).

Our other advice would be to try to pay particular attention to details about the interviewer, and mention them later in a friendly (not creepy!) way.  For example, if she regales you with her adventures while trying to prepare for an upcoming dinner party, wish her luck with it at your interview the next day, or in your thank-you letter.  (Do NOT mention it both times; that gets into the creepy territory.) Finally, you may want to check out our previous tips on the business lunch.

Readers, what are your thoughts?

(Pictured, above:  Business lunch, originally uploaded to Flickr by Frederic Della Faile.)

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Reader mail: Can I take the leftovers from my business lunch?

by C on 09/21/2009 · 75 comments

in Business Etiquette, Fashion, Food, Money

Today’s reader mail wonders whether a doggy bag is ever appropriate…

I was wondering if it’s ever appropriate to get leftovers from business lunches or dinners wrapped up to go. The portion sizes at restaurants can be so large, and I hate having food go to waste (especially food from eating out!) but I am fairly junior and it may seem a bit much (as in grabby or greedy). Thoughts?

We agree, leaving leftover food is wasteful. However, we must caution against asking for a doggy bag (even if the restaurant will shape it into an amusing animal). You’re right, it does sound slightly grabby or greedy — particularly because it’s entirely possible to ascertain beforehand if the restaurant where you’re dining is one that believes in large portions, such as by looking around the room or asking the waiter — which means that taking leftovers might leave the impression that you either a) ordered for dinner as well as lunch, or b) just are not very observant.  Neither are good things for the business lunch.

Instead, we would say that the business lunch is all about precision ordering: if you know you’re not very hungry or just can’t eat large portions, look to the appetizer/salad sections of the menu. There’s nothing wrong with getting an appetizer or two instead of a main meal, or, if everyone else at the table is getting appetizers, ordering a plain green salad as yours. If this is really a problem, we’d advise you to avoid carbs at lunch — no pasta or potatoes — as those can be very filling, at least initially, and instead stick to vegetables, which are less filling, more nutritious, and a good use of opportunity to have someone else cook for you. (If you’re anything like us, all fresh veggies you buy go bad before you have a chance to eat them because you’re always at work, and veggie dishes requiring lots of work like cutting/chopping/cleaning just don’t get prepared that often.) We would also say that there’s no harm in being like Sally and asking for substitutions such as a green salad or fruit salad instead of potatoes, or to ask for creamy, filling sauces on the side.

If you just can’t finish your meal, don’t make a big fuss about it or comment about it — just put your fork and knife together on the right-hand side of the plate, and continue with the conversation.  (Leave your napkin in your lap until everyone is getting up to go.)

Readers, any thoughts?  Do you agree that leftovers should not be taken from a business lunch?

Pictured above: The Montage, the morning after, originally uploaded to Flickr by tstadler.

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10 Things You Should Know about a Business Lunch

by C on 05/12/2008 · 44 comments

in 10 Things, Business Etiquette, Features, Lifestyle, Top Post

No, we’re neither Debrett’s nor Emily Post, but we know a thing or two about conducting ourselves properly at a business lunch… we’ve also seen some truly bad manners. Thus, whether you’ve been to a million business lunches or you’re just starting out, 10 Things You Should Know:

1. As soon as everyone at the table is seated, that napkin goes in your lap. If you need to get up at some point, the napkin should be folded and placed on your chair. (Not the table — no one likes to look at a dirty napkin.) At the very end of the meal, when everyone is finished eating, you should fold you napkin and put it beneath your plate, to the left. This holds true even if you’re eating at a diner with paper napkins.

2. Your water glass is to your right. Your bread dish is to your left. If you get confused, put your hands in your lap and touch the index finger of your left hand to your left thumb, and do the same with your right — your left hand should form a “b” (for BREAD) and your right hand should form a “d” (for DRINK). We’ve also heard to think “BMW”: bread, middle, water.

[click to continue…]

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