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cocktail dresses
Something on your mind? Chat about it here.
Pictured: kate spade “Belleville Pond” Mug, available at Macys.com for $19.
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We are seriously behind in answering this poor reader’s e-mail — our sincere apologies! Here’s the question:
I am a mid-level law associate and my husband is a teaching physician at a local hospital. His boss is getting married in DC in April. It is the bride’s first marriage and it will be a huge event. The wedding is at 5 and then dinner and dancing at 6 at a country club. I have NO idea what to wear. Can I wear a black cocktail dress? I am so bad at these things and I want to make a good impression for my husband and look professional for my own benefit! This may seem like an elementary question, but did I mention I am fashionably challenged? (One more thing: I am barely thirty, but my husband is a good ten years older. I don’t want to look like a airhead, but I don’t want to look old for my age either!)
Weddings, in general, are fraught with chances for fashion errors. What is appropriate — or inappropriate — tends to be very region-specific, as well as wedding-specific. Take your cues from the invitation — the wording of the invitation (are middle names used? does she call her groom a “Mr.”? is “honor” spelled with a u?) and the style of the invitation (is it entirely in script? was there an inner/outer envelope? are there any quirky touches to it?) will give you an idea of what the bride is aiming at for the wedding. In general, avoid wearing black or white to a wedding — we know a lot of places where black is still seen as a color of mourning. D.C. walks a fine line between being a cosmopolitan city on the East Coast, and a Southern city — we’d avoid black if at all possible. (If all you’ve got is a black cocktail dress, be sure to wear a very colorful, happy wrap, as well as bag and shoes.)
That said, look for a dress that isn’t too short, too low cut, too frothy, too shiny, or too bedazzled — because your husband is slightly older you may even want to go for a more demure, knee-length dress. EDressMe.com has an entire section on “wedding guest” dresses; our pick would probably be the Fuschia Sweetheart Cocktail Dresses by JAX, pictured above (available at EDressMe.com for $195).
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We recently got this request in from a reader…
Hi. I have a question about semi-formal attire I was hoping you and/or your readers could answer. I have been invited to attend a law firm event (cocktails and dinner) in early April and the invitation says attire is semi-formal. I was hoping for your thoughts on what is and is not semi-formal and maybe two or three suggestions for dresses that would fit the bill. I am still in law school, so I’m looking for something I could wear to more than one occasion. I’m hoping to keep the price to around $100. Thanks!
Semi-formal: the bane of everyone’s existence. It isn’t formal, it isn’t cocktail, and no one knows what to wear. So… where does that leave you?
Our advice here is to go on the conservative side of cocktail. Your goal is Jackie Kennedy, not Marilyn Monroe (or, ahem, Romy and Michele). As general rules, shiny fabrics and anything bedazzled are out; we would also not recommend strapless (unless worn with a bolero jacket or shrug). Sleeveless dresses are harder to avoid, but you can make them more demure by wearing a wrap. On the flip side, you don’t want to be too boring — a plain cotton or wool fabric will be too casual for the event. If you’re looking for something to wear for more than one occasion, black is your friend. Furthermore, we have no problem keeping the dress itself on the cheaper side — you may even be able to borrow something from a friend at the firm. But you may want to consider splurging on accessories — shoes, clutch, a beaded wrap, a sparkly brooch, a cocktail ring, et cetera.
The below are just some suggestions of what we’d wear… in reality, with your budget, we’d recommend hitting Filene’s, Loehman’s, and outlet malls (particularly if there’s an Ann Taylor outlet near you — we used to live near one and got numerous cocktail dresses for great prices). Readers, please weigh in, particularly if you have a recent sighting of an inexpensive but appropriate semi-formal dress!
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We like that this one has sleeves and is knee-length, but is still fancy. (Although it’s pictured in champagne, it comes in black as well.) We’d wear it with a sparkly brooch and a nice clutch, as well as some fancy shoes. It’s marked to $137 at Bloomingdales (we think only the petites are left). Sutton Studio Exclusive Petites’ Stretch Satin Pleated Shawl Collar Dress |
| This dress breaks a few of our rules — there’s beading, it’s sleeveless — but the neckline is so high and the fabric so fluid that we think it would work also. We’d wear it with a wrap, though, to make it a bit more demure. Price-wise, you can’t go wrong: it’s marked to $88 from $298 at MaxStudio.com. GRECIAN EMPIRE DRESS |
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We’re less than thrilled about this one, but it will do the job: it’s tasteful and within your price range. Nothing sheer or shiny; high neckline; nothing too “out there” fashionwise. And, it’s on ridiculous sale if you’re a lucky size 8: $415 down to $76.49 at Bluefly (price may be good for today only). Chetta B Black Satin V-neck Short Dress |
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This is another new feature: “What to Wear To…” — we plan to tackle attire for office events that are outside the office.
It’s the summer. Your office is flush with interns, either from law school or MBA school. In order to impress, the company holds numerous summer events, including <dun dun dunnnh> the cocktail party. Maybe at a restaurant, maybe at a partner or executive’s house/mansion. The question looms: What do you wear?
Honestly, the answer here is usually “a suit.” You simply don’t want to run the risk of looking like someone’s date. Still, there are times when a cocktail dress is appropriate — and when that happens you should strive to be as conservative and as ladylike as possible. In general, this means your dress should not be:
- shiny
- satin (it wrinkles anyway)
- strapless
- low-cut
- mini-skirted
- relying on a safety-pin in any regard
- appropriate for any of the following activities: being a contestant in a pageant, sleeping, or being a dominatrix
That said, here are some appropriate dresses:
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- Tiered Skirt One Shoulder Dress by Twelfth Street, $255 (EDressMe)
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- Embroidered Navy Rose Dress by Walter, $298 (EDressMe)
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- It’s Only Love Dresses by Nanette Lepore, $495 (EDressMe)
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- Serena Dress by Milly, $339 (ShopBop)
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- Brushed Silk Dress with Beads by Castle Starr, $654 (ShopBop)
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- Silk Dress with Rose Detailing by Rebecca Taylor, $271 (ShopBop)
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- Dyan Dress by Elizabeth Gillett Ltd., $216 (CoutureCandy)
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- 70s Chain Spectator Dress by Yoana Baraschi, $350 (CoutureCandy)
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- Tribal Eyelet Dress by Gold Hawk Clothing, $253 (Couture Candy)
eDressMe SALE – dresses 50% to 80% off
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