Should You Buy a Wedding Gift for Your Assistant if You’re Not Invited?

wedding gift for coworker

2017 Update: We still stand by this advice on  buying a wedding gift for your assistant, even if you’re not invited— links have also been updated below.

If one of your coworkers is getting married and you’re not invited to the wedding, should you give her a gift? What if it’s someone really important — for example, should you get a wedding gift for your assistant anyway? Reader L wonders…

My secretary is getting married very soon, and I’m wondering whether I should get her a wedding gift and, if so, what I should get her. She’s in her 40s and this is her second marriage (she has adult children). She’s just having a small wedding at home, so I didn’t get an invite or anything, I was just thinking it would be nice to get her something but I have no idea what. It’s not like she’s in her 20s and just starting out, so I’m kind of at a loss. Hoping you and/or your readers can help.

Interesting. I see a lot of questions from commenters about what to gift, when to gift, and so forth, so here are my $.02… (Note that my advice is the same if your admin is a man, as well; but because Reader L has a female secretary, let’s use the feminine…)

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The Hunt: Basic Sheath Dresses

sheath-dresses2017 Update: Check out our latest roundup of the best sheath dresses for work!

Sure, we all know what basics professional women are supposed to have in their closets, but if you’re buying one for the first time or replacing one you’ve worn into the ground, it can be a pain to find exactly the right incarnation in stores. In “The Hunt,” we search the stores for a basic item that every woman should have.

We haven’t done a roundup of sheath dresses in almost a year (2014, 2013), so I thought we’d do one today. For my money, the best sheath dress for work has:

  • a work-appropriate hem length (with no slits to compromise that — test with the mirror trick!)
  • a high enough neckline and shoulder situation that you don’t need to give any extra thought to which bra to wear
  • a dark, neutral color like black, navy, or dark charcoal

And — for me at least — I think a sleeveless sheath dress is best because it looks best beneath blazers and cardigans.

I’ll round up some other dimensions though, as well:

Ladies, what do YOU look for in a great sheath dress? Have you bought any great ones recently, or worn any classics into the ground? 
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What to Wear to a Work-Related Golf Event

golf clothes work outingWhat should you wear to golf with colleagues — for example, in a golf scramble — and where should you shop for it? Reader L wonders…

Could you please do a post on clothes for work-related golf outings and where to buy them? I’m attending several golf scrambles with colleagues this summer, and as I’ve never golfed before, I have no idea what to wear or where to shop for it. I’d like to find things that are appropriate without being frumpy. Thanks!

Both Kat and I will freely admit to knowing next to nothing about golf, so we turned to an expert — Donna Hoffman, the president and founder of Women on Course, an organization that encourages women in business to take up golf by offering various events around the country, a membership program, and special discounts. About 15-20% of the women who attend Women on Course events work in the legal field.

Hoffman shared several useful tips for new women golfers planning to attend work-related events:

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When Is It Time to Stop Wearing Tights and Boots?

stop-wearing-tights

2017 Update: We still stand by this advice on when is it time to stop wearing tights to work — links have also been updated below.

When is it time to stop wearing tights to work? What about ankle boots or knee-high boots? Is it determined by date (e.g., Memorial Day), weather, both, or something else? What do you do in the interim? Reader A wonders:

Will I begin to look ridiculous/weather inappropriate for wearing ankle boots to work? Same questions for tights/stockings with dresses and skirts?

I noted a similar conundrum on last weekend’s Open Thread: it’s almost May! It’s 60-70 degrees outside! So: it feels too warm for boots and tights — but it’s too cold for bare legs and peep toes. We’ve talked about summer tweed just recently, as well as bare legs in winter, but that was a while ago.

(Pictured: DKNY has these Light Opaque Control Top Tights in a number of different shades — I’ve pictured the chocolate, but I also like the flannel gray and the light beige “caramel.”) 

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Fashion for Doctors

Fashion for Doctors | CorporetteWhat are the best fashion tips for doctors? What special fashion challenges exist, and what are the best workarounds? Reader S wrote in to ask…

Do you think you can do a fashion post addressing the specific clothing needs of doctors? Specifically young female doctors who need to look professional but still want to look polished and hip while also being comfortable? Thanks!

Interesting question, Reader S! I had a few ideas, but also reached out to two fashionable doctors I know to get their take. Note, of course, that we’ve talked in general about how to look professional when you’re young, as well as how to act older. For what it’s worth, I’ve never really noticed my female doctors’ clothes, in large part due to the lab coat, but I do remember thinking “ooh, pretty” about various necklaces — big ones, delicate ones, interestingly layered ones. With my most recent pregnancy, the OB/GYN practice encouraged you to see every doctor in the practice, as anyone may be on call when you deliver — and almost none of the women wore a doctors’ coat. They’re based in SoHo, so some of the doctors were dressed very fashionably — think jumpsuits! — but no one ever stood out as unprofessional. In fact, the biggest fashion gaffe that I’ve noticed among my doctors in general is messy hair. I’ve never stopped seeing a doctor I liked because of that one factor, but it did leave a “harried and crazed” impression that was less than professional. SO: for my $.02 as a patient, neat hair and interesting necklaces are the things that I remember. (Pictured: I love the bright, happy colors of Mindy Kaling’s character on The Mindy Project.) 

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Apps for Working Women: What Are Your Favorites?

Apps for Working Women | CorporetteLadies, what are your favorite apps for working women?  I rounded up some of my favorite Android apps  a few years ago, but now that I’ve switched over to iPhone (in December 2014), I’ve been collecting an ever growing list…

  • Pocket.  After our post on information overload, I did such a good job of getting my Pocket cleaned up, primarily thanks to dumping stuff that was “for later” in Evernote.  (At one point I went from something like 1250 articles to read later, down to 200 articles.) Then I got pregnant and had another baby, and it’s out of control again. The app has stopped counting, though, so I’m not sure how bad it is — I just opened the app on my phone and it said it was downloading a 158 new ones.  Sigh.  At least I’m never short on reading materials…
  • CalenMob.  I love my Google Calendars, and have several — a personal one, one to schedule Corporette stuff, one for my sons’ stuff, etc. — and it never seemed like iPhone’s native calendar did a good job of syncing them.  CalenMob bridges the gap for me. There is a free version and a “pro” version for $6.99 — I just bought the pro version.
  • Sheets. Excel seems to be my default program of choice these days, so I like being able to edit everything in Sheets.
  • If This Then That.  I’m still playing around with this one, but Lifehacker is perpetually in love with it.  What recipes are you guys using?
  • Key Ring.  Handy for when you have a bunch of store cards/loyalty cards and don’t want to carry them all with you, so you can scan the bar codes and so forth into the app.
  • Pinterest.  I love this for collecting visual ideas — decor things I want to try, outfits I like, etc.  You can follow us at http://pinterest.com/corporette.
  • Evernote.  I use this like Pinterest, but for articles.  I’m still figuring out how to make the most of it, to be honest, but it was a great way to unload my Pocket reading list when I first started.
  • Dropbox. As I mentioned at CorporetteMoms in our post on organizing family photos, I love Dropbox — we first started using it back when I was on Android and my husband was on iPhone (and I’m also just generally suspicious of Apple’s iCloud stuff), and the love continues.
  • Sleep Cycle.  I’m still searching for the best “hack your sleep” app; at the moment I like Sleep Cycle.
  • Seven.  This app is great if you want a really focused workout — it’s a seven minute HIIT workout, inspired by a NYT article.  Do multiple cycles to get the most effect, of course, but even one cycle can help.  I also just downloaded the app Seconds to try to find a way to put HIIT intervals on top of music (but haven’t had a chance to try it out yet).
  • DarkSky.  Wondering what the weather will be like in the next HOUR? Dark Sky is great for that — it was designed by two people who were driving cross country, and happened to get stuck inside the rest stop without umbrellas when one of those out-of-nowhere storms hit.  Would it last ten minutes or an hour?  They didn’t know, so they created an app for it.
  • Other basic must-haves: Seamless. Fresh Direct. Open Table. Shazam.  I don’t read a ton on Kindle (see my out-of-control Pocket list, ha) but I have that on there too.

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