I hope everyone is having a very very happy holidays this season! Just a head’s up that the Nordstrom Half-Yearly Sale has just started. I’ll do a few of my top picks below, but do note that you can use this tag to see ALL of the reader favorites and best-sellers included in the sale.
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Pictured above, a bit of something for everything, from outdoor fun to Zoom tops to workwear: blue rain coat / black rainbow-dot camisole / black print blouse / bluetooth earmuffs / hiking shoes
- Big savings on Barefoot Dreams!
- workout duds: great deals on workout items from Zella, Alo, Sweaty Betty and Beyond Yoga
- outdoor gear (perfect for everyone’s new outdoorsy hobbies!) from The North Face, Sorel, Merrell, Rossignol, smart outdoorsy accessories from U|R, and lots of hiking shoes and trail shoes
- loungewear from Free People, Lou & Grey, Splendid, Gibson, 1.State, and Honeydew, including lots of joggers, sweatshirts and slippers
- lingerie deals: don’t miss the sales on Natori, Chantelle, and Wacoal
- jeans from Paige, AG, Wit & Wisdom, NYDJ, and more
- As far as accessories go: there’s a nice selection of AGL sale items, as well as Sam Edelman, Stuart Weitzman, Marc Fisher LTD, Kate Spade, and Tory Burch
- Specific workwear brands of note: there’s lots to love in the sale from Boden (!), Halogen, Hugo Boss, Theory, Nic & Zoe, Court & Rowe, Kate Spade New York, Equipment, and Tahari. Lots of cute dresses for work and play from Maggy London and Eliza J
- beauty sales: great deals on T3 and MAC
Readers, what are you hunting for on sale this year?
Workwear Sales of Note (as of 1-26-21)
- Nordstrom – Designer clearance up to 70% off
- The Fold – Lots of items on sale!
- Boden – 20% off dresses & jumpsuits (ends today)
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 60% off clearance; extra 70% off 3+ clearance styles
- Ann Taylor – Extra 50-70% of all sale styles
- Loft – Extra 70% off all sale styles
- Lands’ End – 40% off full-price styles
- Banana Republic – Up to 75% off sale styles; up to 40% off must-haves
Toothapple
Please help me respond to this in a fair way to my boyfriend.
I am spending my first Christmas with a new partner, it is our first one together. I found a bumble notification on his phone and when I asked him about it, he replied that he never thought to delete the app when we became exclusive.
My past partner cheated on me for two years and I feel I am blowing this out of proportion because of my past history.
My current boyfriend is kind, sweet, and loving. I believe that he is telling the truth but I am upset and this is ruining our vacation. I know what would make me happy and satisfied but I dont want to dictate his words to me.
I don’t want to minimize my discomfort but also want to honor my own feelings. Hive, please help.
Go for it
Ok here is a paraphrase from Brene Brown…” The story I’m telling myself is “
and then you say…because I’ve been cheated on before i think it will happen again.
So you see, It puts the onus of responsibility on you. Truth is that love is always a gamble~ worthwhile nonetheless.
From what I read, you are letting your past cloud your future and that is unfair to you both.
Another technique if you are so inclined is to pray for your ex, really meaning it. You can use the hono Pono Pono (look it up) phrasing. I have found it to be very effective.
Good luck
Anonymous
Did he go ahead and delete the app? That would tell me all I needed to know. (Him initiating.)
The Original ...
There are 3 things happening simultaneously here:
1. You are feeling triggered by previous experiences.
2. He has not deleted the app.
3. You have not discussed this so both understand one another.
For 1, spend time thinking about this person and whether he gives you signs of untrustworthiness or risk. If not, this is a you thing to work on in therapy. If so, this is a you thing to work on in therapy and you need to remove someone untrustworthy from your life.
For 2, did he delete the app unprompted after he saw that it upset you?
For 3, if he doesn’t know that you’ve been mistreated, he may be confused by your feelings. You may be confused that he did not delete the app. Have a conversation. Do not ask him to delete the app, see what he does or offers when he hears how much this bothers you. If he offers nothing or if he digs his feet in on having the app, it’s a red flag. If he seeks a solution that calms you, that says something about how he cares for you and whether he cares about this app.
I don’t think anyone would love to see a partner with a dating app so no one is nutty here, it’s just a communication experience to work through and then the way you work through it will give you info about potential in this relationship!
Monday
+1. Don’t invalidate your own concerns about this unless he’s taken the basic, obvious step of deactivating his profile and deleting the app, and done so completely voluntarily. There’s no reason he shouldn’t be rushing to do that.
It’s so hard with past hurts in relationships. It’s not fair to mistrust a current partner for something the previous one did. At the same time, if you attracted a cheater once, it’s totally reasonable to wonder if you’ve attracted a cheater again.