Coffee Break: Forma Satchel

93 Comments

1. Going to NYC next week (hopefully…😬). We have our trip planned out, but I’m wondering if this group has any can’t-miss spots, like fun bakeries or shops. We’re definitely hitting Chelsea Market, Zabar’s, and the Bryant Park winter village, but I’d love any other suggestions.

   1. Sip & Co. near Central Park – a cute little coffee shop cafe that isn’t part of a giant chain.

   2. Eataly

      1. Eataly is the type of place you take your Midwestern mom.

         1. Ha, I’m not the 3:00 poster but I like it! It’s touristy but she’s a tourist. I am a Midwestern mom but a very well-traveled one including half a dozen trips to Italy.

      2. there are about 100 more food halls that are not chains. Skip Eataly. If you want sort of tourist but unique to NYC, go to the new Time Out market food hall that opened in Union Square.

         1. Time Out is a chain found in more cities than Eataly.

            1. +1

      3. I was in actual Italy recently and absolutely shocked at the number of Eatalys I saw–train stations, airports, on the street–they are fine for the U.S. but I can’t even fathom how they got a toehold in actual Italy.

         1. They’re kind of like fast food in the US. People don’t think it’s great but they’ll go there for a quick bite.

   3. What kind of trip? Couple, girlfriends, family w/kids, etc?
      I like the Union Square Christmas market, but I’m not sure when exactly it opens for the season.
      Tea at Alice’s Tea Cup is fun. It’s affordable (especially by NYC standards) and really tasty. We originally went because I have a young daughter but I liked it so much I now recommend it to adults without kids too.

   4. Go to K-town! You won’t be far at Bryant Park and you’re likely to find a far better meal there than anywhere else in midtown. You can check out K-beauty brands too (and sunscreens). It’s generally around 32nd street.

      1. Yes. We went to Woorijip, a cheap grab and go place with seating. It was fun to walk around and just grab what looked good. There’s a Korean beauty store nearby, Kosette.

   5. Niche, but if you are into bourbon, Widow Jane’s distillery tour is really good and you can buy a lot of there hard to find options in the store on site.

   6. It’s expensive and crowded but if you can get a reservation at Balthazar, go. It’s so fun.

   7. Where will you be staying? What else are you doing? The best suggestions may be hyper specific depending on what else you are doing.

   8. is this like your first NYC trip or you’ve been before? bc if you’ve never been, visit a department store

      1. As a New Yorker, what? Just … what is special about a department store? I used to work at one in the city, and tourists were ALWAYS disappointed. They expected luxury goods for cheap trinket prices for some reason.

         1. not the poster at 3:32 but i agree, if she’s never been you should go to 5th avenue/59th and least walk along 5th avenue south. the window displays (and entire building displays in a lot of cases, like for cartier and vuitton) are amazing but particularly for the big department stores like bergdorf and saks. i still miss the ornaments at barney’s.

            1. I don’t mean to actually shop, I’m a former New Yorker and the sheer size is not like anywhere else

         2. NYC department stores are awful. Crowded, noisy, disorganized. They do carry a better selection than department stores elsewhere, but you can’t find anything, you can’t get a fitting room to try it on, and you can’t find anyone to ring it up if you want to buy it.

            The famous wooden escalator at Macy’s is very disappointing.

         3. At the holidays, the window displays are cool and worth checking out but yeah I don’t think going inside is that big a deal. Most big cities have Saks, Nordstrom etc, it’s not that special.

   9. For bakeries, you could try Hani’s, Librai, Radio, Win Son, Te & Company, Lysee, Banh by Lauren, or Elbow Bread. It’ll be cold next week, so good timing for brothy noodles in Chinatown, I like 1915 Lanzhou Hand Pulled Noodles. The shop Wing on Wo & Co near by is great. The Locavore has all products made within 100 miles of NYC, I think, and would have good suggestions for you if you have questions.

   10. I am here to tell you and anyone who might listen to please go see the play Liberation! It is fabulous. Tickets are not selling well, so it might close early, which would be a real shame.

       1. Great rec.

   11. Thanks, all! I live in the Bay Area, so am good on Eataly and department stores. I’ll definitely check out some of the other places!

   12. The Metropolitan Museum of Art gift shop is great and you don’t have to pay the admission fee to get into it.

2. did anyone else see the story in the NYT about “did women ruin the workplace?” i tried to listen to it but i can’t stand russ douchehat anyway and when the first lady started off by being whiny that they should pay her to write a new piece about why women don’t suck i had to step away.

   dahlia lithwick and rebecca solnit’s FB pages are both having fun with it today.

   1. I have a general rule about not clicking on anything Ross Douchhat has written. Serves me well.

      1. +1 – especially with a headline like that one. Thankfully his name sparks joy. Asshat.

   2. No, but I did find David French’s earlier column on the same topic interesting.

   3. I tried to get through the first paragraph and I just decided it wasn’t worth raising my blood pressure. Ross Douthat and David Brooks are my least favorite kind of men – always whining about how women and liberals ruin everything without even once engaging in self-reflection.

      1. Ugh, David Brooks! My favorite fact about David Brooks is that he left his wife for his research assistant while writing his book The Road to Character. Which is about building character and living a virtuous life.

         1. OMG, I remember that! I also love how half of Brooks’ more recent columns are like, “oh, it’s so sad that no one has a village anymore,” and I just think, well, you’d probably have more of a village if you hadn’t run off with your much younger research assistant! Ten bucks says that everyone at their kids’ school knows and likes the former Mrs. Brooks.

            1. Right? He also talks about the regrets he has about not being around much while his kids were growing up. I would love to know what they think about him.

         2. Wow, I did not know that. That makes the preachey commencement address he gave at my alma mater on the importance of marrying the right person even more hypocritical.

            1. I feel like he’s completely unaware that the person he’s preaching to is actually himself.

         3. There’s very few things as repugnant as when an old man marries the mistress. At least there’s a job vacancy now.

   4. It’s an awkward interview speaking in broad generalities. No data or research cited, unlike other NYTimes interviews I’ve seen. No back and forth or genuine conversation, at least 15 minutes in. Slow pace.

      1. I refuse to watch these videos or listen to podcasts because they are so very slow. I will read the transcript, but if there’s no transcript then sorry.

         1. I might start using AI if only to summarize these terrible format transcripts.

   5. Oof I started my day by ranting to my husband about this (really should have found something better to do with my time…) Infuriating article title aside, I think they are debating interesting issues that matter — woke culture, how to reorient professional culture to accommodate men, women (+ the entire gender spectrum) and ways current workplaces have failed, issues with and better positive modern conceptions of femininity and masculinity.

      BUT this was not a real debate at all and Andrews in particular makes very poor arguments. She somehow started her “argument” by asserting: “I started by observing our institutions in all the ways that they seem very clearly self-evidently broken and not working the way that they’re supposed to, in ways that you could sum up in the word “wokeness.”… So I think I will restrict myself to the judgment on which I am confident, which is that the pathology in our institutions known as wokeness is distinctively feminine and feminized. And that, in a very literal sense, our institutions have gone woke because there are more women in them than there used to be.” Without defining either wokeness or femininity! I disagree with her, but I’m more disappointed that there is not even an argument to engage with, just an assertion repeated ad nauseum. Ugh.

      1. Right. Would love to hear any conservative explain how “wokeness” is what destroyed our Supreme Court.

      2. Yes! Honestly the terrible standard of logic torqued me off more than anything! and then by her own standards….shouldn’t men be rejecting her argument, because it’s pretty much just vibes and feels?

         If you want to make the argument that female judges, for example, ignore precedent and make bad rulings (measured by % overturned on appeal? internally inconsistent? are more affected by external factors, like the before lunch/after lunch effect?), bring data. Then I can my contradictory data and we can have a nice, solid, disagreement on the merits.

         But if you want to have a vibes + feels Twitter war, the first person who comes to mind right now when I think “ignores legal precedent” sure isn’t a woman.

      3. Yeah I was actually interested in the overall topic and hearing a different viewpoint but there was nothing to sink your teeth into. Plus, everyone came across as somewhat unlikeable, sorry.

         1. Yeah – I kept reading hoping to comprehend the argument, and never did. That said, I am not particularly worked up about having read something I didn’t agree with. Even this little comment thread shows the woke horror at being exposed to opinions not aligned with one’s own. Instead of complaining that someone we disagree with is “given a platform” why not just respect their right to have their own opinions?

            1. “That said, I am not particularly worked up about having read something I didn’t agree with.”

               No one’s worked up by having to read something they didn’t agree with (this isn’t school, no one was forced to read it.) We’re worked up by the obvious, seething misogyny. Helen, is this you? Strawmen seem to be your thing.

               “Even this little comment thread shows the woke horror at being exposed to opinions not aligned with one’s own.”

               Wrong again. The comments here display dismay at the obvious misogyny in the “arguments” in the interview and the title of the article. We’re allowed to be horrified by misogyny – that’s not being narrowminded, or simply unwilling to consider opinions not aligned with one’s own. I’m happy to consider lots of opinions not aligned with my own, like, for example, that trickle-down economics is a good idea. I’m not willing to consider opinions not aligned with my own such as “women and/or people of color are inferior to white men and we were all better off when they were systematically discriminated against.”

               “Instead of complaining that someone we disagree with is “given a platform” why not just respect their right to have their own opinions?
               Who ever said she can’t have her own opinions?” She can have her own opinions. But they shouldn’t be given a veneer of credibility they don’t earn, and they shouldn’t be promoted by a popular, mainstream newspaper with international readership. Why do you think it’s acceptable to promote misogyny? (In case you need to be told, racism is wrong, too, and shouldn’t be platformed.) She also deserves to be called out for the hypocrisy inherent in having a career that’s based on advocacy that other women shouldn’t have careers.

               Stop whitewashing misogyny as a simple “disagreement.”

            2. I actually like David Brooks. He did a nice job on the PBS Newshour back in the day when I used to watch. And he’s a somewhat apologetic moderate conservative, so detesting him is kind of like… huh. Maybe he messed up his personal life but I am interested in what he thinks and why.

            3. Why not publish any random 12 year old’s opinions, if the merit of the opinions doesn’t matter?

               I’m not annoyed simply by reading things I don’t agree with, but I am suspicious if poorly reasoned, poorly argued opinions are being platformed that it’s in an effort to get people to accept these opinions as more reasonable or rational than they are, without earning it.

            4. Is this an opinion worthy of the New York Times?

   6. Profoundly offensive. Ross Douthat is routinely awful and I cannot figure out why NYT continues to give him a platform. This particular “discussion,” if you could call it that, is a new low. Helen Andrews is an intellectually dishonest, unmitigated misogynist who needs to recede back into the swamp of right-wing blogdom where she came from. V. disappointed that NYT has platformed her disgusting views twice now in the last month or so.

      In generally, I want to hear a lot less from David Brooks, Ross Douthat, Frank Bruni, and Ezra Klein. I feel like they’ve dominated the op-ed section lately and all with really bad takes.

      1. Just reading the title curled my hair.

      2. The first op-ed was a conservative refuting her views. I don’t know how that is “platforming” them.

      3. What’s your beef with Ezra Klein?

         1. Trust me, your brain will be happier not reading whatever answer she gives.

         2. Maybe she’s a NIMBY person in California?

         3. Not the person you’re replying to, but I’ve always found him arrogant and off putting.

            1. Same here. He’s so smug and just likes to hear his own voice.

               I am a liberal from California, just to forestall any accusations of being a conservative.

3. Kindle Unlimited – Do you have it? Like it? Use it? Trying to decide if it is worth the monthly fee.

   Thanks!

   1. If you read the books on it, it can be well worth it. I have ethical issues with it, but I understand that some Indie authors are trapped in the ecosystem and it’s the way they make their money. To be on KU, you have to be exclusive. I focus on using Libby and getting my ebooks elsewhere, but kindle is easy.

      1. There are usually promos for a few free months every year and that’s more than enough for me. Most of the good books on there are ones I’ve already read from my library, so there’s not a ton I want to read. I certainly wouldn’t pay for it. It could be more worthwhile if you don’t have a good library or have different taste in books, though I read a little bit of everything. They don’t have much good literary fiction or nonfiction, but last time I had it, I read some romance, golden age mysteries, contemporary mysteries, a couple cookbooks, and a few of the Discworld books. My library also has most of what I read on there, but it was nice to skip the waits for some of them (I’d been waiting for the first Discworld book for a couple months at that point).

         1. Gah, sorry for the triple post and this showing up as a reply to you. Not sure what was going on, my post just disappeared into to ether (not into mod like normal, though it eventually showed up 15 minutes later).

   2. what do you read? i read romance and use kindle unlimited almost as much as i use the library. there are a ton of authors included, many of them who seem to be using KU almost solely. super easy to switch books in and out (up to 10 i think).

   3. I have it and feel like I get my money’s worth. I read a lot of silly murder mysteries and its a good source for that kind of thing. Also, shockingly, two of my book club books this year (both older nonfiction) were available on it so that was a big win.

      1. ooh, which are your favorite silly murder mysteries? read and loved the first two books in Thursday Murder Club but just DNF’d Marlow Murder Club.

         1. I enjoy the Davis Way series by Gretchen Archer. Found on KU.

   4. When I had it I enjoyed catching up on a bunch of Ellie Jordan Ghost Hunter books without buying each one individually. Looks like there are some more I should catch up on.

      1. Overall I didn’t find it worth it though, but maybe I need more help finding books. I do use Libby a lot so I’m not looking for anything the library has.

   5. Yes, I have it. If you read enough to make it worthwhile and like the books in there. I like light fiction and have found a few authors I really like and go back to. If you travel, there are a lot of Lonely Planrt and other books to browse that I find convenient. I also use it to read cooking and other magazines on my tablet with the Kindle app, which I otherwise wouldn’t buy.

   6. There are usually promos for a few free months every year and that’s more than enough for me. Most of the good books on there are ones I’ve already read from my library, so there’s not a ton I want to read. I certainly wouldn’t pay for it. It could be more worthwhile if you don’t have a good library or have different taste in books, though I read a little bit of everything. They don’t have much good literary fiction or nonfiction, but last time I had it, I read some romance, golden age mysteries, contemporary mysteries, a couple cookbooks, and a few of the Discworld books. My library also has most of what I read on there, but it was nice to skip the waits for some of them (I’d been waiting for the first Discworld book for a couple months at that point).

   7. There are usually promos for a few free months every year and that’s more than enough for me. Most of the good books on there are ones I’ve already read from my library, so there’s not a ton I want to read. I certainly wouldn’t pay for it. It could be more worthwhile if you don’t have a good library or have different taste in books, though I read a little bit of everything. They don’t have much good literary fiction or nonfiction, but last time I had it, I read some romance, golden age mysteries, contemporary mysteries, a couple cookbooks, and a few of the Discworld books. My library also has most of what I read on there, but it was nice to skip the waits for some of them (I’d been waiting for the first Discworld book for a couple months at that point).

   8. Nope.

      Not any more.

      I look for Libby, paper library and paperback before I use Amz.

      I have bought a second e-reader to help me transition. Yes, kindle is still easier, but I really don’t want it be my primary platform.

      I will still buy anything that is platform restricted that I really do want, but other than that Amz is now *never* my first choice. The older stuff that is free because the copywright is expired I *never* get from Amz.

   9. They will certainly have a promo for Black Friday so I would wait until there’s one and try it. I go back and forth. I don’t read any of the native to it books, but they sometimes have pretty recent books that I could get from my library but don’t want to wait.

   10. Yes, I am a hard-core voluminous reader, so as long as I read several books from KU a month, the monthly fee is worth it to me.

       -There is a lot of poorly edited, poorly written stuff in KU. You need to be choosy.
       -There is also a lot of very well-written and stuff in KU. I have found some jewels.
       -KU often has older books by popular authors and the selections come and go. It’s a good way to try out a new to you author and see if you like their writing.
       -KU is a great way to support authors, who for whatever reason, were not able to be published by a mainstream publishing company. It will expose you to authors and books you may never have found otherwise.
       -KU is a great way for these authors to build a readership. If they’re good, OR if they’re popular it can make their careers.
       -KU, for me, is low stakes. I try books out, I don’t like them, I don’t finish them. No angst. It’s a sorting hat.

4. Can anyone recommend any good family-friendly resorts in Punta Gorda? Considering it because it’s a direct flight… thank you!

   1. Belize or Florida? Guessing you mean Florida because I don’t think PG Belize has direct flights anywhere except within Belize. But I don’t think Punta Gorda Florida itself is anything special. I would look at nearby places like Siesta Key.

5. I work for my family business, and I realized recently that no one is really responsible for collecting on accounts receivables. So for example, we have $500k in invoices that are over 90 days due, with many of them years old. No one at our company is responsible for following up on invoices, except sporadically and for some accounts.

   I escalated this to my boss and I got palpably frustrated in describing it. For example, the sales reps are supposed to be responsible for collecting on each of their accounts, but none ever do. One of them had an account that we provide services to every month that hasn’t paid us in 2 years. I reached out to their A/P person and they responded immediately requesting the invoices for the past due years. Meanwhile, the rep has supposedly been ‘working’ on getting in touch with the A/P person for 3 months but hasn’t. This rep is mainly an account manager and works maybe 10 hours a week, so it’s not like he didn’t have time.

   But I feel ashamed for seeming frustrated and for implicitly throwing others under the bus. Was I out of line? I mostly described examples like the above but probably with some heat in my voice as I was describing it.

   1. Eh—things get lost in the shuffle, yes. But it’s good to light a fire under people’s behinds every now and then.

   2. You say it’s a family business, so I assume that has an effect on everyone’s relationships, but in a normal situation, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to say, “We really need to get better about collecting on old A/R. For example, Dylan’s client hasn’t paid in two years and Beth’s got $40,000 uncollected in the last year.” But in my experience, you need to have a dedicated person who is in charge of this, or have there be actual fallout for the account reps for not following up, or it won’t get better.

   3. Well now I have a better window into why one of our vendors did not invoice us for any work for three whole years, in spite of multiple requests for a statement of account.

   4. The way to get them collected is to tie the salesperson’s compensation to it

   5. No, you were not out of line at all. I feel like a family business where family members can can be “account managers” working 10 hrs a week is bound to be a disaster.

   6. Thoughts from a former receivables collector:
      Link commission payments to open days on AR ~ you will not be popular~ sales will try to get you to believe the buyers will run~ they will not.

      Run a monthly aging and commit to 2 calls a day / get sales to do it (see commissions)!
      Take notes on the call ~ ie, 11/6/25 spoke to so & so, committed to paying x on …date (share the notes with sales if applicable). Follow up on that x date to confirm payment has been sent.
      The calls help build a rapport with the AP people on the other side . Be friendly, smile when you call. Wonky but works.

      Assign the collection to a specific person and give a bonus on the collections made. There are a number of ways to calculate a bonus rate for this. Industry varies on method.

6. I inherited a team that is disorganized and in need of some improvement. I am running up against feeling like TAH though in trying to right the ship. For example, one woman routinely makes mistakes that cost thousands of dollars (at least 1-2 a month). We ship overseas, and shipping containers charge a ton for any mistake you make. She will enter the wrong information and we get fined or she will mix up documents and we will ship something to the wrong location and lose most the value of the sale. I typically chalk it up to “everyone’s human” but after 3 incidents back to back in a month, I escalated to my boss and asked how we might troubleshoot. He roped in other people, and I felt like a tattle-tale. I hadn’t realized they were all mistakes, so I had brought it up to him as “What change can we make for XYZ department to fix this?” But his response was “These are all Sally’s mistakes” and considering our equivalent of a PIP.

   There are other examples of me finding a gap in procedure that has huge ramifications, but wind up on accident calling people out in trying to get it fixed. Like “We need to start doing this because XYZ is happening,” when XYZ is someone’s direct fault.

   I feel like I will start alienating everyone and that I’m a tattletale. But it’s also a downturn in our industry and we can’t afford to lose tons and tons money because people are checked out and not accountable.

   1. If by “inherited a team” you mean “are now their manager”, you’ve gotta stop thinking of addressing problems as “being a tattletale” (that goes for everyone but doubly so for management).

      Fundamentally, sometimes a problem is solved by changing a process, and sometimes it really is an individual person’s fault, and they either need to step it up or you need a new person in the role.

      But also, it sounds like you are getting caught by surprise/don’t have the background and info to know which problems are who’s fault — can you set up some background onboarding 1:1s with people throughout the organization; ask people to explain to you how XYZ works, etc. Ideally, if you manage Sally and Sally is the problem, you want to talk to her first individually, not bring up the issue in a large group setting with *her* boss present as well, and that will alienate your team if you don’t stop doing it – sounds like you need more info about how things currently work and who owns what.

   2. I really feel like people are extra human now. Either they’re checked out like you said, or they have brain fog from the pandemic, or stress, or all of it. I wouldn’t assume accountability will fix it though if they’re trying their best and their best just got worse.

      1. Yeah. I live in a state of perpetual fog right now and would probably just give up entirely if someone new wanted to lecture me about accountability.

         1. But genuinely, if you were making mistakes costing thousands of dollars each time, would you not want to figure out solutions to have that stop happening? And if you were unwilling/unable to not make such mistakes on a frequent basis, wouldn’t it seem said job was not right for you?

            I have brain fog too, but I don’t understand the concept that excessive and costly mistakes should be 100% tolerated and that addressing them is wrong.

      2. People who are “extra human” are extra great candidates for getting replaced by someone capable of professionalism.

         1. Mistakes aren’t always about professionalism; they can be an issue of functioning. Sometimes a process can be improved to catch more mistakes. Sometimes yes a more capable person needs to replace someone who has lost some of their capabilities, what a tremendous insight.

   3. It sounds like an audit is in order. Especially as you’re the new manager, you have an opportunity when learning systems to figure out how work is done and what the challenges are. Is Sally the only person who routinely makes this sort of mistake?

      If so: Is she in the wrong roll or being assigned the wrong duties? Is she under particular time stress and does she have the right resources to do her work well?

      If not: what is wrong with your processes?

   4. I agree that you need to know more about your team and their processes. Like for Sally’s mistakes, it would have been helpful to know they were her mistakes before you went to the boss.

      “We need to start doing this because XYZ is happening” is fine if you just tell your team or the people who need to know, not higher ups immediately.

      1. You are the manager. You should be investigating the cause of the errors and designing the solution before you bring your boss in.

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