Thursday’s Workwear Report: Stretch-Cotton Poplin Midi Skirt

132 Comments

1. how do you find your operating expenses for the year? trying to run retirement numbers. do you include mortgage and stuff? Only for the foreseeable future where there is a mortgage?

   1. We have retirement savings taken out of our paychecks before we see them and spend most of the rest. Our costs are relatively steady throughout the year although Q4 is always a bit expensive with all the holiday entertainment and booking spring and summer travel. We usually kind of drain our savings account towards the end of the year and then replenish it with our tax refund.

      Retirement costs are kind of a giant black box to me because the big variable as healthcare needs. As long as we’re able to live independently, we’ll be rolling in money. Our house is fully paid off and we live in a LCOL area and even with my insatiable wanderlust we won’t need that much money to live well. But of course when we have to go to assisted living or a nursing home, it’s a completely different story and we’ll be burning through our savings rapidly. So we’re just trying to save as much as we reasonably can and hope for the best.

   2. I do not include mortgage or kid expenses, but I include everything else, including home renovations and new cars. One thing I recently realized that I have not been including is income taxes, since our pay goes into Simplifi net of withholding. My retirement withdrawals will all be taxable (no Roth). So now I take my monthly expenses and increase by about 25% to reflect tax liabilities. I do not otherwise adjust very much. Some things will be more and some less expensive in retirement, and I can’t predict the future well enough to know which is which or to what degree. It’s an estimate, and after tracking several years’ of expenses, I can see how remarkably consistent they are.

   3. well, you’re going to need to pay for somewhere to live regardless – so if you still have a mortgage, include that, but also look at the costs for eventual assisted living.

      Thinking about it, I can’t really assume our daily “burn rate” will drop in early retirement. Our mortgage will be paid off between now and then. But it’s not like we’re going to stop traveling, dining, subscribing, having utility bills, making Target runs, etc. In fact likely those costs will increase once we don’t have work keeping us busy 10 hours a day!

      Minor offset for not needing office clothes… but then no longer having employer-sponsored healthcare will be an obvious increase.

   4. I am in the middle of reviewing our retirement plan. Our general approach is just to save as much as possible, which for us is maxing tax-advantaged accounts. I don’t think it will be enough, but that’s what we can do. You do need to estimate your expenses to run illustrations, so I am using current expenses minus mortgage principal and interest (be sure not to subtract property taxes and insurance!) plus predicted Medicare and Medigap premiums plus a hefty monthly cushion for things we usually pay for out of non-retirement savings like new cars, home repairs, and travel. The frustrating part is that the on-line calculators do not make it clear whether and/or how they factor in taxes.

      I always assume that we will get nothing from Social Security.

      1. Assuming you will get zero from social security is a mistake because it will cause you to undervalue your retirement savings and therefore risk working longer than you have to and dying before your savings come close to running out. I think discounting it is fine. We use 80% of expected value.

      2. How do you source your Medicare projections?

         I’m quite a ways out from retirement but realized after running a number of 401(k) and IRA calculators that we might be able to dial back our contributions a bit and enjoy some of those dollars now. I know which of our current expenses will continue after retirement, but struggle to find a realistic estimate for the new costs.

         1. I looked up costs for Medicare premiums on the Medicare site (be sure to account for expected income) and used random web search results for Medigap, estimating at the higher end of the given range.

            1. Thanks!

   5. Your 401(K) provider has tools you can use to prepare a financial plan. You have to pay a specific amount towards your medications, and for your own optical care, dental care.

   6. I run the numbers both with and without my mortgage. I use YNAB, and I just look at our average monthly run rate, x it by 12 for the annual total, then x it by 25 to see where we are relative to the 4% rule.

   7. If you escrow your property taxes and insurance, be sure to check out what those are now. If you’ve been in your house for a while then you can figure out the average increase over 5 years or whatever.

2. DH recently updated my wedding set with a gorgeous solitaire lab diamond, and the center stone is a mini-ring pop. I am a senior program manager with a mix of white and blue collar team in a casual/business casual office (not C-suite). What would you do? Rock the sparkler or wear a simple wedding band and save the rock for more special occasions.

   1. Life is short. Wear it

      1. This.

         1. agree! unless it snags on stuff in which case, save it for special occasions.

   2. lab diamonds have gotten so popular that my first assumption is a huge rock is not the $$$$ piece it used to be, so I’d just wear it and enjoy the sparkles!

   3. Rock the sparkler. I would also assume that it’s lab-grown, or perhaps a piece that was inherited.

   4. Just enjoy your new ring – congrats

   5. One more thought: unless there are other indicators that you two are rolling in it (very expensive handbags, driving a car to work that costs more than most people’s salaries, international travel, sending kids to expensive private K-12 schools), I would just notice that you have a beautiful ring.

      A lot of things that might strike people as “inappropriate” are really a combination of the same thing over and over. If you’re an intern with a Birkin who works hard, takes direction well, and doesn’t have a ln attitude about doing grunt work, well, maybe your aunt left you a small inheritance and told you to have a blast with it.

      1. Implicit in this line of thought is the idea that wealthy people are lazy and entitled. Unfortunately, it’s been my experience that lazy and entitled people are present at all income levels (as are diligent and hard-working people).

         1. I grew up around very wealthy people (went to the college where my family’s name is in a building) and am a total workaholic, so no, that is not my assumption.

            It can be other people’s assumptions; it can also be their assumption that someone who doesn’t need the job is not necessarily someone worth investing in. Women do have to handle this more than men do. I don’t like that sexism exists, but we should acknowledge its existence.

   6. Wear it without question. Dimming yourself doesn’t make anyone else shine brighter.

   7. I wear a big sparkler and it’s not even real. Wear it.

   8. Rock the ring. No question.

   9. I always assume a big ring, especially a new big one, is lab-created or fake.

   10. I work in a similar environment – wear it.

   11. I work in likely a similar environment and honestly a big ring wouldn’t even register to me as “odd” (separate from the question of “even if it is odd, is it worth doing”). So if you like it, wear it with confidence!

   12. I’d wear it if you find it comfortable for every day wear and its durable enough for it. Personally as a sensory preference, I prefer just a band.

   13. Do what makes you happy. For what it’s worth, I never, ever notice stuff like this, and I have zero interest or idea about luxury prices for things.

   14. I would assume it’s lab grown and not give it another thought.

   15. If you have such a ring, presumably it’s because you like it and want to wear it. Go for it!

   16. You don’t have to always do one or the other. Wear it when you feel like it, leave it at home when you don’t.

   17. Thank you all for the advice and encouragement!

3. I have excellent time management and realizing I do not have good energy management. Anyone good at this? I am depleted earlier, for longer, with certain work and personal things and starting to see patterns. Do I adapt as this is part of 40 and beyond? Do I try to minizime these energy sucks?

   1. Also post-40, and I feel like I’ve spent some significant time this decade in trying to figure this out. My energy is different. I don’t like it, but I hate fighting it more. The biggest piece that I haven’t figured out is, bluntly, work takes the best hours of my day, and I’m really resentful about that. I would love get out of management forever and go part time, but my DH is not on board with that idea.

   2. I think it’s a little bit of column A, a little bit of column B along with making sure your labs/hormones are being appropriately managed. My energy is lower in my 40s but I feel SO much better after going on supplemental estrogen/BC pills. I’ve also focused inward more (immediate family, my health, my parents/inlaws) as I’m aging, my teens need more of my mental energy, and my parents/inlaws have significant health needs.
      I think it makes total sense that I’m more tired trying to manage all of that (plus a big job, pets, my home, my marriage, etc.) vs. in my 20s/30s when I was less important at work, my parents were healthy, and I didn’t have mutliple kids/pets!

   3. I had to recognize that just because I had open space on my calendar, and I could “technically” do the thing, that didn’t mean I had open space in my mind / emotions / soul / body for doing it. I had to stop letting the time spaces on my calendar be the only thing I consulted when saying yes/no to adding things to my life.

   4. An unexpected benefit of a GLP1 for me is massively increased energy. I started it as part of menopause treatment and omg what a difference it’s made there. I feel 25 again.

   5. Thank you for naming my issue! I run out of steam before my work day and personal day are completed. So for both work and personal I have a habit of making certain daily activities and chores as the last things to do in my work day and then evening at home. For work it’s an actual stack of files and to do notes. These certain things are ones that need doing but that are easy to perform and do not require interaction with other people or much energy or thought. Other than that I am interested to see what others suggest.

   6. Look closely at your patterns and work with them. I find there are certain times of day when I do certain things best, so I’m particular about sticking to those – anything numbers related is done between 11:00 AM and Noon, and anything creative (powerpoint, writing, etc.) is done between 2:00 PM and 4:00 PM. This scheme seems to keep the mental-energy-suck of each type of work in proportion. If I try doing my expenses at 4:00 PM it’s nothing but frustration and mental drama.

   7. Since there’s a pattern, maybe you have some good insight into when you could try to build in breaks before you run out of steam? Perhaps in ways you can look forward to. Take actual breaks if you can (even 15 minutes) and end your day just a bit earlier. Coffee break, walk, bath, reading — whatever it looks like for you. Tell yourself life is about the small pleasures and it will be rewarding plus it’s been said that breaks can actually increase productivity. Alternatively, schedule rest times after strenuous activities. I think yes, you have to consciously be kind to yourself when your capacity begins to lessen. Otherwise you’ll risk burning out or having health consequences.

   8. Both, if possible. Can you identify the energy sucks? For me, it’s talking to people (in meetings but also casually). So I’ve tried, with varying success, to give myself time alone throughout the day. You do need to protect your energy and brainspace, but I recognize that you also have to get stuff done. But start with noticing one or two things that deplete you and see if you can work with that.

   9. I’m 49 and definitely agree that it’s both an age issue but other issues contribute for sure. i think you have to really track your energy for a few days and see what makes an impact. you could try these all at once and see if there’s any impact at all, and if there is you can start subtracting things to try to figure out which one worked —
      – naps, even 20-45 min, maybe when you come home from work
      – solid 8 hours of sleep with consistent sleep/wake times even on weekends
      – b12 + multivitamin
      – eating healthy fat midday like half an avocado
      – eating healthy fat before bed like a spoonful of pb
      – really hydrating
      – batching tasks that tire you out the most, for me it’s phone calls and people stuff

4. Trying to develop a comprehensive cleaning system for the house, broken down by daily, weekly, monthly and quarterly tasks. Any pointers on resources that can help me get started?

   1. Clean Mama might be a good resource, though I rarely accomplish as much in one day as she does.

   2. Haven’t used it myself, but I would look into Fly Lady.

      1. +1

   3. Mine is cleaner comes weekly and does an annual deep clean ;)
      Don’t waste your precious life on chores like this.

      1. Op here – I am one of those odd ducks that actually really enjoy cleaning! I put on a audiobook and take such pleasure in making things bright and shiny. Weird, but it works for me! I just need to know where to point my energy…

         1. If you like books, Home Comforts by Cheryl Mendleson is an oldie but very thorough. I think Martha Stewart has a book on this as well.

      2. what do they do for the annual deep clean? we tried to negotiate just for dusting like every 6 months and that was problematic because they weren’t sure about bookshelves and the like.

         1. Everything – inside cabinets, light fixtures, walls, moldings etc. I have an individual not a service.

   4. There’s a phone app “Tody” that might help you get started with some default lists and timelines.

   5. Martha Stewart has a chart somewhere in her website. I used to keep a print-out taped to a kitchen cabinet. There’s an astonishing number of articles there solely about house-cleaning. Just read a few –why give your info to yet another app?

   6. Check out Go Clean Co on Instagram and on her website. They have these checklists as well as tutorials on how to properly clean. I found her during Covid and have been loyal ever since.

5. I’m so sorry for the victims of the latest mass shooting in Canada. It’s probably the worst trend America ever exported – not male violence itself, obviously, but in the school setting. Will Canada do better than us at taking real action?

   1. Probably.

   2. The news is reporting that this individual had mental health issues known to police that led to guns in the house being seized. And this shooting still happened. Not sure what else Canada could have done.

      1. As a Canadian, I’m thinking the main change may be to revisit the system for return of weapons when they have been removed if it turns out the returned weapons were used. I could see that tightening up a little.

         It’s a very very small town (2,400) so I do think it will spark discussions on the challenges of providing mental health care in rural areas as that’s a bigger problem but not one with clear solutions.

         1. It’s also likely to spark discussions on why this population is over represented in school shootings. Whether it’s the hormones or underlying mental health comorbidities, this needs to be looked at.

            1. By “this population,” do you mean transgender people? if so, I don’t think the data bears out your claim. According to the Gun Violence Archive, less than .1% of mass shootings in the past 12 years were perpetrated by transgender people. Cis males account for over 97%.

            2. Why are young white men so insanely overrepresented in school shootings? Someone needs to examine that. It must be their hormones.

            3. That’s not true. Not overrepresented. And even if it were true, the VAST majority of school shootings/mass shootings are perpetrated by straight white boys and men. Not a miniscule percentage of a smaller group.

               If anything needs to be looked at, it’s why we let straight white men own guns.

   3. We already have strict gun control laws. What we need is a better healthcare system with mental health supports.

   4. Australia just showed us, New Zealand a few years ago. I remember Germany making big changes when Columbine was more recent. Does any country get it perfect? No. But most governments at least attempt to do something.

      1. I feel like all the US will ever do is “thoughts and prayers.” We ought to repeal the Second Amendment, or limit it to only weapons used during the writing of the Constitution (smooth-bore muskets and pistols).

         1. Yes, I am also a traditionalist in this matter.

   5. while it didn’t make national headlines, there was also a school shooting in Montgomery County, MD earlier this week.

      1. US school shootings have become so common that they don’t register any more. We just accept them. It’s disgusting.

      2. That was different, though. It wasn’t so much a school shooting as a shooting that happened at a school between two students arguing over an expensive jacket or some other trivial thing.

         Source: went to that high school in the ’00s. We had serious violence and gang problems back then too. Our building security team had 13 people on it including a full police officer and it was still a constant struggle to keep the fights to a minimum.

         1. it is still a shooting happening at a school!!! I did not realize it had all of those issues. I grew up nearby and it was generally considered a good high shool

         2. Sort of co-signing. No affiliation with that school, but with a well-known very large public school with a very large security team and many staff with the titles of “behavior modification technician” or similar wording. It sends a large # of kids to Ivies and public flagships, but that’s not the whole population of the school.

   6. I am grateful we are dropping the pretense that a woman committed this atrocity.

      1. 🙃 why is there so much tr4nsphobia here.

         1. So don’t see any phobia here, just legitimate questioning of what is at best pseudoscience and I’m being generous here. It seems that while maybe some people were well-meaning, many go down that road vs getting mental health for disorders or conditions only made worse by surgeries and hormones.

            1. No, there’s plenty of phobia here. I mean, be serious. Norealli’s comment wasn’t a “legitimate questioning” of what you describe as “at best pseudoscience.”

            2. You are right. My comment stands on its own feet. This was not a female shooter. That is a statement of biological fact.
               My heart is with the lives lost, the injured, and all the families.

               Your accusation of transphobia is shallow and unimportant in the face of this horrific event.

         2. We are questioning. Is that not allowed?

         3. I ask myself why this board is so ****phobic every time it comes up. It makes me so sad, as someone who knows and cares for people within that community who do not fit the inaccurate stereotypes thrown around here.

            1. No matter how much you care for people within that community, and no matter how equally we treat people in a social sense, it is simply not true that a person born with a male brain and body is biologically the same as a person born with a female brain and body, even if the male-born person’s biology has been altered with hormones and surgery. The old “gender is a spectrum” attitude was much more accurate than the artificial binary argued by today’s activists. If you want to get people on your side, stop insisting on false equivalencies and accept that the issue is complex and nuanced.

            2. Not toeing the current Democratic Party line on this issue is not automatically transphobia, and your willingness to be ~so sad~ that others reject this dogma is part of the problem.

      2. Yeah, I saw the headline that it was a “female mass shooter” and instantly knew it wouldn’t be. #notourcrimes

6. Going to London in mid April for spring break – help me pack. I am going with my husband and kids and we’re planning to hit up a lot of the tourist spots like museums, castles, gardens, watch a show or two, and a nice dinner. Our hotel has a dress code for dinner and I would like to look smart. Will I need a trench coat or something heavier?

   1. I think the blogger Jo Lynne Shane did a London trip last year in April and did several posts about what she was packing. You may want to check those posts out. I don’t remember whether she did a post-trip recap of what she was happy she brought v what she didn’t use or should have taken.

      1. I’d love to see a post-mortem of bags backed for trips. I am so aspirational when I pack, like I’m in a Merchant-Ivory film or on a follow-on to Succession for work trips but I will somehow go to the gym or for a run every day.

      2. She did a post-trip recap!

   2. My hack for Europe and London is real pants, wool or wool blend instead of jeans. Wear with sneakers and whatever for day, toss on a sweater and scarf/jewelry and flats for dinner. Keep the whole look monochromatic. Easy to pack and look appropriate everywhere.

      1. Would you mind sharing what brand of pants you would recommend, in wool or wool blend? Need to do the same thing, but would like to narrow options.

         1. I like JCrew and Veronica Beard. The latter for a couple of really nice pairs. I don’t like them lined so I only do MMLF for dressy office. The former for casual, everyday and travel. Oh I also like Anthropologie’s Maeve ponte pants for this purpose.

   3. A trench coat is perfect; you will fight right in. I would leave room in your bag to buy a few items of clothing there.

   4. A trench will be fine but I’d take some things to layer with it (scarves, knitwear) as some days and certainly evenings in April can be chilly.

      1. I always take silk long underwear when I go to London, and I’m always glad I did.

   5. I was in London in September and definitely agree on the trench recc. I also was so inspired to buy wide leg jeans after that trip. So much more comfortable and styled so diversely there.

   6. The weather in April could be anything, sun, rain, wind , hot cold….and changeable .layers, waterproofs, trench is fine.

7. can anyone recommend professional flats for wide feet? My pinky toes can’t take it anymore!

   1. Margaux comes in widths.

      1. I found Margaux is not wide enough! If you want to try Margaux, don’t buy on sale so you can try on and return if it doesn’t fit.

         1. +1

   2. I have wide feet, and I find that if I’m willing to sacrifice some padding, minimalist shoes virtually always fit my wide feet. Anyas reviews is where I find the brands, and she provides very comprehensive reviews on virtually every type of shoe imaginable.

      1. +1. I only use minimalist / barefoot shoes on my feet with bunions. My feet don’t hurt anymore.

   3. I like Wydr for wide shoes. I’ve got the short boots and almond toe loafers and they’re really comfy.

   4. I normally wear a wide width (10W in sneakers) and found these shoes that fit me:
      rag & bone Cabochon Spire Mary Jane Flat, and
      Paul Green Anabele Mary Jane Flat
      Many Clarks come in wide widths, but you have to be careful of the style

      1. I have wide feet and wear many different Paul Green styles. I can’t say 100% of the styles work, but a very high percentage do.

8. I’m leaving a job soon and want to stay in touch with a senior colleague (we’re both litigators). He’s retiring but well-connected and wise. We’ve worked together closely for 5 years. I’m terrible at networking and relationships in general; this one went well because we had common projects and shared quality standards.

   Any advice on maintaining a relationship? It’s probably just coffee invites now and again, but curious for other ideas.

   1. What works best for me with people I don’t see on a regular basis is creating small groups of people (think 3-5 people who would want to get lunch together) and setting a recurring quarterly meeting. That way if someone cannot make it, they just go the next time. It’s not fun or organic, but I’ve had success at keeping these sorts of groups together for a decade. Otherwise, if you just want to meet up with this person, set a quarterly reminder to yourself to reach out.

   2. set notifications on your calendar to reach out to him whether it be to schedule coffee/lunch, wish him a happy thanksgiving/new year, etc.

9. Husband and I are thinking about a New England coastal road trip in late September/early October. Neither of us have visited this area before (would be flying in from the South). What would you put on an itinerary? Would have about a week. Thank you!

   1. Honestly, I wouldn’t focus on coastal New England, I’d go to the White Mountains in New Hampshire. If you’re determined to stick to the coast, I’d probably split my time between Boston and Maine, getting up to Acadia if you can. But I’m more of a hiker, though I do like Boston as cities go. If you want to spend more time in small towns, then your preferences would probably be different.

      1. Please tell me more about a potential White Mountains, hiking-heavy trip.

         1. It depends on how much of a hiker you are, but some of my favorites are Franconia Ridge, Mt Washington, and Mt. Moosilauke. That area gets pretty busy in the fall, so ideally you would try to hit that during the week, and you always need to keep an eye on the weather. Acadia is also pretty spectacular in the fall, and I think a bit less busy, though that might not be true any more.

   2. Boston, Salem and Marblehead, Portsmouth, Portland, and small towns near Portland.

   3. Mystic, CT; Newport, RI; Newburyport, MA; Kennebunkport, ME

      1. I like this. Depending on where you’d fly into/from, consider into Hartford or Providence, then to Mystic, Block Island (perfect shoulder season there!), Newport, maybe swing thru Boston to Newburyport, then Portsmouth or Kennebunkport ME, fly out of Portland ME.

         1. Agree with the prior poster! With the lens of someone traveling in to the area, I’d pick and choose to avoid too much driving for locations that are somewhat similar (in particular, Newburyport and Kennebunkport are very similar, and Portsmouth is a smaller version but similar to Newport which is much like Portland). Salem will be a ZOO from September to early November, so agree to avoid that. I’d aim for September if possible!

            I’d personally fly into Boston, do a day or two there maybe with a day trip out to Concord, MA; and then either go South or North. The South trip would be Newport, Block Island, Mystic and then fly out of Hartford. North trip would be Newburyport, Cape Elizabeth Light (right next to Portland so not a full day), Portland and fly out of Portland Jetport.

   4. Bar Harbor/Acadia

   5. Mystic, CT; Watch Hill, RI; Newport, RI; Providence, RI; Boston, MA

10. We are planning our first anniversary trip to Japan! We are first timers so following the golden route for 14 days: Tokoyo > Kyoto > Osaka > Tokyo with day trips/quick stays in Hakone, Hiroshima, Miyajima, Nara, etc. Flights are booked and most hotels, so interested in any food recommendations or activities/shops along the way!

    1. This will be an amazing trip! I recommend limiting the short-term (1 night) stays and prioritize shorter day trips. There is so much walking to be done, so bring multiple pairs of walking shoes so you can swap them out every few days.

       I strongly recommend hiring a local tour guide for at least 1 day in Tokyo, Kyoto or Osaka. We used ToursbyLocals, but if you find a guide you like there, google them and see if you can book direct. There is so much to do and they can help you get to spots that are a little harder to navigate (you may want to tell them to prioritize those type of destinations so you can do the easy tourist stuff on your own). Some are also really great with getting you into small/local restaurants you otherwise would not know exists (or that would not serve tourists).

       Get an eSim card for your cell phone when you get to the airport, it will make a difference and is relatively cheap.

       We used Royokan Collection for more traditional but nicer hotels (think more onsen). If you want to do something modern, do that in Tokyo (we LOVED the Hoshinoya, but it’s in a more ‘business’ district area — still next to the Imperial Palace though). Also used TableLog and PocketConcierge for fancy restaurant reservations. You pay a premium but it makes it really easy and avoids language barriers. (Only some hotels help you book in advance, and many good places fill up before the hotel will agree to help you.)

       Hidden gem in Hakone is Itchiku Kubota Art Museum. Whatever you do, you can’t go wrong. Just know you won’t hit it all in one trip.

    2. I am so excited for you for this trip! It has been over 10 years since my visit to Japan, so most of the details are hazy, other than that it was amazing and you should eat all the things.
       However, I will put in a plug for the less well-known option of the Sake Brewery Street of Saijo. You take a train from Hiroshima to Saijo and on this street, just a short walk from the train station, are several sake breweries. You can walk from brewery to brewery, tour them, and taste their wares. (IIRC, we did not stop at every brewery because we got too tipsy : ).) One of the unexpectedly cool things was that many of the breweries had spigots near their entrances where you could drink their water. I do not normally care about water, but even I could tell this water was special (it’s part of the reason sake is brewed there). We even saw people bring several large containers to fill up from a particular spigot.

11. Following on the cancer discussion yesterday, if a late-stage cancer hits when you are <65, your medical bills may be super-substantial, bankrupting you if you live. Medicare may not be great, but it covered everything for my mother except for a longer-than-needed stay at subaccute rehab while we tried to figure out hospice. The hospital bills were $400K (paid by Medicare) and rehab was 20K/month (paid by us). My parents were retired — they didn't need to stay working to keep a roof over their head and their health insurance. If you are younger, you may lose your home and if you lose your job, your health insurance. IDK how people do it. When my cousin had cancer, he was working and had to use all of the STD, LTD, and FMLA leave, as did his wife (who leaned on my aunt/uncle who were retired to help also); he would up dying, so she had his life insurance to help dig out of the financial hole. She would have preferred to declare bankruptcy with him alive though.

    1. It’s a big driver of the older homeless population. People survive the cancer, but end up broke, out of work and somewhat disabled. Meanwhile, what few services available are being decimated by government funding cuts and NIMBYS who don’t want services in their neighborhood. Just more of winning, I guess.

    2. my parents spent $$$ flying to boston and staying in hotels every other week for a clinical trial (which ultimately did not work). fortunately they could afford it, but obviously not everyone can

    3. it’s horrible. why do we not have universal health care? i read somewhere that a stepped plan would start by lowering the medicare age to 55, then 45, then 35…

       1. Because no one has worked out a way to convince Americans to stop voting against their own best interest.

       2. Universal healthcare is not the universal panacea some imagine. The allocation is not by cost but by waiting time and availability (see NHS issues). And if tied to where you live, as some are— a huge driver of inequality. I lived in two universal healthcare countries….

          1. I live in a place in the US with one of the best health care systems in the world and rated as such about every other year. And yet I often must wait 14 to 18 months to be seen in various specialities, despite the issues involved being things that worsen over time and benefit from earlier treatment. This undercuts the “availability” argument against universal healthcare, in my eyes. If this is my experience in a place with many healthcare providers, great insurance coverage and being a fairly savvy consumer, what is it like for the average person?

          2. I live in a universal healthcare country and no one, I repeat, no one, go here bankrupt for having cancer.

       3. Generally in healthcare, you can get two out of three: value (lower costs), quality, or convenient access. Universal healthcare systems will often deliver quality care at a lower cost, but at the sacrifice of convenient access (meaning you get long waiting times). The current patchwork system in the US has good quality, hit-or-miss convenient access, but ludicrous costs. Hospital systems are the same, all the way down through healthcare.

    4. This is another example of how you’re so much worse off being single. If you’re married, you have the ability to be on a spouse’s health insurance, even if you have to stop working. Ditto having a second income.

    5. How people do it?
       – COBRA
       – homestead exemption for medical debt
       – Short term disability followed by long term disability
       – FMLA
       – SSDI with compassionate allowance
       – emergency savings followed by hardship distributions from your 401(k)
       It’s not a perfect system, but it’s a very different picture than what you represent.

    6. Even Medicare isn’t great. See how Medicare decided those few extra days of your mother’s in subacute rehab were not medically necessary? I’d say someone with advanced cancer, ending treatment and trying to figure out hospice deserves a few extra funded days in a nursing home rather than just about anyone. And as you know Medicare covered Hospice covers very little. Dying at home requires an incredible amount of family support and finances to avoid suffering.

       Medicare denied the chemotherapy that my mother’s doctor recommended for her pancreatic cancer. The incredible stress placed on a family whether to write a check for $13,000 for one dose of chemo when their loved one’s life is at stake is huge. And let me tell you that the newest drugs are much more expensive and there are many Medicare doesn’t cover.

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