Tuesday’s Workwear Report: Bridgette Jacket
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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
Yes, the calendar is telling us that it’s fall, but it’s not really official until we put on something houndstooth or tweed. This lady jacket from J. Crew is a gorgeous option. Something about the boxy cut and shiny buttons is really doing it for me.
I would wear this with some high-waisted trousers or a midi skirt for a great office look.
The jacket is $268-$298, but today this one is marked to $209.50. It also comes in three other colors of tweed: white, burgundy, and black.
Sales of note for 9/23/25
- Nordstrom – Fall savings event! Also: get 15% off select beauty items and 6x points on beauty.
- Ann Taylor – 30% off tops and sweaters
- Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything + extra 15% off
- Boden – Up to 40% off
- J.Crew – Extra 30% off sale styles, plus up to 50% off layers they love
- J.Crew Factory – 40-70% off everything + extra 60% off clearance
- Nordstrom Rack – UGG up to 40% off
- Rothy's – Up to 50% off last-chance sales
- Soma – 5 panties for $39 + 35% off 3+ styles + buy 2 get 3 free panties — readers love these PJs and these no-VPL panties
- Talbots – Anniversary event! 25% off entire purchase, plus fresh fall classics from $34.50
- White House Black Market – $50 off $200+ purchase
Yesterday’s comment made my remember that my mortgage will be done 5th Oct, I think I should celebrate it in some way. Im single no kids, any suggestions? What did you do? Thanks
Yes, you should absolutely celebrate!
I’d probably spend the equivalent of my now non-existent mortgage payment on a new piece of art for my home.
In some places, having a red front door means you’ve paid off your mortgage. So maybe you could refresh your front entrance as a way to celebrate?
I have never heard of this! Where is this a thing?
Nowhere.
I’m honestly so confused why someone would advertise this??
Different poster here. I know multiple people with red doors who still have mortgages. But what’s wrong with advertising it?
We took a nice vacation about 6 months later with the would-have-been mortgage funds.
I’m also single and no kids. I hired a caterer and invited two dozen friends for dinner. Bonfire with passed hors d’oeuvres and champagne outdoors as well as an open bar; buffet and desserts indoors. It was great to host and not be responsible for preparing or serving anything, so I could just enjoy and celebrate with people I love.
I’m the OP from yesterday, and I love this idea. We like to host, but too often I get into the trap of trying to make everything myself.
I would buy myself a nice ring or bracelet to wear daily, so each time I looked at it I would get that little thrill of “I did this really amazing thing.” I love having daily reminders of something that has made me so happy.
I’d pop a bottle and order a nice dinner!
And then use part of that mortgage payment for a nice treat (something nice for my house probably)
Nice bottle of champagne and dinner in, plus a nice piece of art when you find something you love. Don’t forget to still set aside funds for insurance and property taxes – those still come as sticker shock to me every fall.
I bought this jacket in a different color, and I like it. Caveat: those are snaps, not buttons, so my usual approach to J. Crew (replace all the gold buttons) is not an option. Fortunately the snaps on the version I got are more muted than the usual J. Crew gold.
oh, thanks for pointing that out. The snaps kill it for me as I usually wear these jackets open over a sheath, but the column of empty snap holes is not cute!
Thanks for the info! Kinda like that, kind of don’t. Definitely something to think about.
For the gardeners here: where do you buy seeds? I started a raised bed kitchen garden this year and it went pretty well! We had a few types of lettuce, spinach, carrots, radishes, tomatoes, peppers, squash, cucumbers, various herbs, and nasturtium and marigolds. Last year I got seeds from a big box but I’m guessing there’s something better out there.
I order from Hume seeds — they’re targeted for short season and cool climate areas.
My local garden center. And I get starts not seeds, I find those easier but am impressed you do seeds.
We did a combination of starters and seeds. Which works better seems to be about timing. The marigolds I bought as plants are now spent, the ones I planted as seeds in March are just now taking off. Same with the basil, my plants from March are giving me seeds and my seeds from March are giving me plants (plus some volunteers). The tomatoes I bought as plants are still going, the seeds are growing now but I don’t think they’ll get big enough to produce fruit before the growing season ends.
DH set up an indoor growing station for me, but it was too late in the season to use it this year. I plan to use it next year!
Oh wow! You’ve inspired me to look into seeds! That’s so cool!
check out winter sowing — it’s the easiest way to do it.
Seeds from Eden or Burpee usually – depends on who’s offering a sale when we want to shop. I don’t know that they are better quality than what’s on the rack at Lowe’s but there is a lot more variety!
Everyone I know who grows veggies loves MIGardener. For flowers I like Johnny’s or GeoSeeds (huge catalog, great prices, but no pictures or instructions).
Seed Savers Exchange! They have a gorgeous catalogue and great options.
Note: if you encounter Baker Creek, know that they are deep in the ras ict right wing hole.
Johnny’s or Eden Brothers
IANAL, but I’m curious if Tylenol’s parent company has a basis for a law suit against the Government for being named as THE cause of autism, especially since the actual drug Acetaminophen is not named. I’ve seen a number of people comment on social media saying that they have a case, but is that really true?
In any case, props to their social media and legal teams in the next few weeks.
I don’t know, but acetaminophen was named. Watching Trump try to pronounce it is hilarious.
I was wondering this too. Even if there’s no scientific basis for believing him, we know that doesn’t stop people, and no woman will want to take the chance during pregnancy. It’s already a very fraught time with so much pressure.
Hit reply too soon. I was trying to add that it wouldn’t be hard for Tylenol to prove the reputational damage.
For entirely other reasons it would be best if people took less Tylenol while pregnant and also if it weren’t OTC at all. But who will people sue when they mistakenly take other OTC meds that are worse?
Huh? What are your entirely different reasons?
Tylenol would never be approved as an OTC by modern FDA standards given the low toxicity threshold and severe risks. It’s absolutely wild how much liver damage and liver failure is caused by acetaminophen (including the need for liver transplant). It’s a holdover from another era of regulation and public health.
Some of the research that’s being twisted to claim that exposure “causes” autism actually shows that the toxicity threshold can be lower for autistic people and their relatives, which is not great. Massive retrospective studies have raised concerns about lifetime exposure risks (so the idea that it’s totally safe so long as you don’t OD may not be true either).
Higher levels of fetal exposure is already linked to totally other developmental issues mostly affecting reproductive organs.
Yeah, the number one reason being it doesn’t do jack sh*t, lol.
It varies. It’s always helped a lot with pain for me, including for migraine headaches.
This right here!!
Yeah, I don’t understand what people are even taking it for. I probably only take OTC painkillers once or twice a year, and it’s not because I’m not in .pain (I actually have a chronic pain condition and am in pain all the time, though my usage was no different before I developed this condition), they just don’t seem to actually do anything for me, especially not Tylenol.
I think this one of those genetic things where it totally works for some people and totally does not work for other people. (Though if you admit it doesn’t work for you, you may get treated like a seeker!)
I thought it was pretty well known that in general Tylenol works on headaches but not muscle pain – Advil (ibuprofen) is better for that. Like for cramps, it’s ibuprofen all the way.
Drugs can act differently for different people. For many, Tylenol is the safest, most effective option. But since it doesn’t work for you, clearly that means it needs to be banned for all.
It doesn’t work for pain and is bad for your liver. It does work for fever.
I’ve taken it in pregnancy for fever, which it works great at, and headaches, which it helps some with but is better than nothing.
I never said it should be banned. I was genuinely asking why people were taking it because I never ever hear anyone mention taking Tylenol or it being effective for anything. If anyone I know is taking an OTC painkiller, it’s always ibuprofen, never Tylenol.
I’m the 9:23 poster and I’m allergic to ibuprofen so never had that as an option. But Tylenol has been very effective for me, including for things like muscle cramps. It seemed to help my kids a lot with teething pain too (they were terrible teethers).
I think I would have barely survived COVID without Tylenol as a fever reducer. I personally don’t rely on it for pain, so can’t speak to that. But I don’t think there is a good alternative for fever, and it works like a charm for me as to that.
Genuinely curious, why shouldn’t Tylenol be OTC or taken during pregnancy?
With Tylenol/acetaminophen, there’s a really fine line between pain relief and You need a liver transplant.
For some people, just using it for a few days can make your liver numbers look a little funky on a blood test even a month after you stop taking it.
I’m a bit of a nut about Tylenol because of the liver dangers, and all the warnings that even one extra dose can kill your liver! I even called poison control when I messed up my baby’s schedule and gave him a second dose an hour early.
But at the same time, my sister was given prescription ibuprofen and acetaminophen after her c section and told to alternate them for weeks, and the dose was as like double the OTC. I was pretty wary on her behalf, but clearly people take it with no ill effect?
I gave my daughter a double dose of Tylenol once when she was a baby and called poison control and they said it would take 5-6 times the OTC dose to send people to a hospital.
Some people are better with Tylenol than others; there are a lot of factors that go into what would be too much for you vs. too much for me.
I don’t know, it’s a cost-benefit analysis and other medicines have big risks too. When I gave birth and had my wisdom teeth out, the choice was between Tylenol and Vicodin (or nothing, I suppose, but I needed some pain relief). I don’t regret choosing the Tylenol. I don’t think I ever exceeded the maximum recommended daily dose but even if I had I’m pretty sure it still would have been a better choice than Vicodin.
Tylenol has never improved dental pain for me at all, I have a contraindication for ibuprofen, and dentists here stopped offering anything else, so “or nothing” it is!
Oh absolutely not. I’m pregnant and just popped a Tylenol and the hospital gave me one last night. I’m not letting this brain rot determine my medical care during pregnancy.
I didn’t take a single thing during the course of my two pregnancies not Tylenol, not aspirin, nothing, nada, zip. I have one autistic child and 1 neurotypical child. This focus on Tylenol does a huge disservice to us all.
Good for you! I was pregnant a long time ago and I remember getting so annoyed at all the “advice” from randoms, though thankfully it wasn’t generally public officials who dominated the news cycle back in the 00s. These are matters for physicians, and being miserable just for the sake of misery isn’t necessary.
I mean, I think Trump is an idiotic pompous a**, but wouldn’t this fall under presidential immunity?
They can sue the agency that is saying its Tylenol’s fault.
What about sovereign immunity?
Bleeding issues with NSAIDs. Now people won’t want to take Tylenol.
Opioids. Oh how gleeful the opioid industry must be right now.
You can’t take ibuprofen during pregnancy.
Completely believe this may be pro-opioid propaganda for his mega-donors.
We adopted a cat over the weekend. He’s a total sweetie! However we’re pretty sure my 9 year old is allergic. What now? She’d been around other cats before and we were not expecting this. She’d be heartbroken if we couldn’t keep him but also maybe miserable if we did. :(
I have allergic reactions to some cats that my symptoms kick in if I am in a room with the cat owner. For other cats, I have virtually no allergic response and I lived with one of those cats for a few years. I have no idea what you should do, but it is possible to respond badly to some cats but not all cats.
+1 I know it doesn’t help this situation if this cat is one she’s allergic too, but my allergic friends have definitely noted differences between certain cats
There are cat allergies, and then there are cat allergies.
If it’s relatively minor, you might consider something like Purina LiveClear cat food to try to turn this cat into a relatively more hypoallergenic cat.
Definitely consider though whether the hearts involved may be much more broken after several weeks of trying to make it work! For a younger child maybe the novelty would be over by then and it would actually be easier, but a nine year old might bond in a way that makes having to give up the cat a lot harder. I was astonished at how hard it hit me, a grown adult, when I had to give up a cat that didn’t work out for household pet reasons after just a month of trying!
Thank you, I didn’t know about this as an option!
THIS! Just watched. Video explaining the science of this cat food, and it’s fascinating.
There are allergy shots you can do and they work well for some people, not so much for others. But I agree that rehoming now is going to be much easier than rehoming in a few weeks or months.
+1 – better for everyone, including the cat
+2. As a cat lover, I think it will be really hard on everyone to try to make this work and it still might not be possible. Better to just rehome him now than to let everyone get attached.
Plus, allergy shots take literally years to be fully effective.
Couple of questions and suggestions:
What is the allergic reaction? If it’s the sniffles then that might clear up on its own when she gets used to kitty. If it’s in her chest (ie she’s wheezing, having trouble breathing even with her mouth open) then that can get serious very quickly, go to the pediatrician ASAP. If it’s a skin reaction then tell her not to let the cat lick her and brush the cat very well before she touches him again.
Have you given the cat a bath? She could be allergic to something else from the shelter that’s on the cat’s coat. I know you’re not really supposed to bathe cats but I’d try that before changing kitty’s food or, worse, returning him. They make supposedly hypoallergenic shampoos, they’ve never worked for me. Get a shampoo that’s best for kitty’s skin, your vet can recommend something.
You could put a Hepa air filter in her room, keep her door closed and don’t let the cat in there, and wash her bedsheets more frequently. My son is allergic to cats and we have one. He does take allergy meds but he is allergic to other things. Is it possible it isn’t just the cat she is allergic to – could it be seasonal allergies or were her symptoms tied to the cat? You could also go to an allergy doctor to do a scratch test to confirm she is allergic to cats. It would be good to know in any event if there are other things she is allergic to.
She’s not attached to this cat yet, don’t put her through anything, rehome this cat now before you all do, and get a different one or a dog.
Have you bathed the cat? My mother was allergic to cat dander and could be around them for short times, but would have breathing problems with too much exposure. However, if we bathed ours every few weeks it kept the allergens down enough that she didn’t have issues. If your child is the same way, bathing the cat would be a good first option.
I am mildly allergic to cats. I sniff and sneeze for a few weeks, and then my body adapts.
I should add: I’ve been a cat owner (or owned by cats) for almost fifteen years. It’s a few weeks of discomfort, and then it’s over.
You’re lucky. My cat allergies get worse the longer the exposure.
I am allergic to cats, but my kids somehow still convinced me to get one. So we have a cat now. I use a special foam on him that helps control the dander, feed him hypoallergenic food, and I make sure he never comes in my room so that way my bed doesn’t get cat hair on it. I run an air filter in my room and in the living room. I also vacuum the furniture regularly. I have bad allergies to other things so I have always taken a allergy pill daily but I think it helps with the cat allergies too. I sometimes pet him and let him sit with me, but I always change my clothes before getting into bed even if I was already wearing pajamas.
So this is a timely question. My almost 2 year old had a slight allergic reaction to petting a cat a couple of weeks ago. Same kid has food allergies. So in our routine exam yesterday our allergist added a cat skin poke test. He did not really react at all to the cat test. Our allergist said for such a young kid it’s unlikely he’d have an environmental allergies, it’s more likely the cat regularly eats one of his allergens and then licking himself, that’s what our toddler was probably reacting to. I found it fascinating. So if your kid happens to have a food allergy in the mix, it might be worth double checking the cat’s food.
Make sure cat cannot get into the kid’s bedroom and put a hepa filter in there to cut down the dander when she sleeps- having 8 hours a day with no allergens can really make a difference for symptoms.
Get the hypoallergenic cat food
Allergist visit + skin prick testing to see if your kid is actually allergic or if she has the sniffles. Allergy shots + Zyrtek or Claritin if so.
I tested highly allergic to cats, but only long haired cats make me sneeze and my eyes water. I wash my hands after touching any and don’t touch my face. I’ve had short haired cats my entire life without issues besides a normal allergy pill.
I have cat allergies that have worsened over time. Now, when I hang out in a house that has a cat – even if the cat is not in the room – I start feeling itchy everywhere and even with Benadryl, I feel off for a couple of days. Please consider rehoming the cat and adopting another pet instead (I vote for a dog). My allergies are so bad that since my parents have adopted two kitties, I am not planning to visit with them at their home ever.
Been a while since I needed to immerse myself in children’s books. Am meeting an old acquaintance that I have not seen for years for coffee soon, and want to bring a book or two for her child, who just turned one. Need some recs please – best books for this stage of childhood?
I’d pop into a local bookstore and ask them for recs if possible. If your friend is not local, a book that’s written by a local author or has a connection to your city/area would be great.
My main advice is avoid the big names like Goodnight Moon, Very Hungry Caterpillar, Love You Forever, etc. We got multiple copies of all of those.
Agree on avoiding those.
“My Friends” by Taro Gomi is a bit of sleeper hit that not many people have. We tend to give that one along with Richard Scarry’s “I am a Bunny”
Whatever mama will enjoy, kids just like hearing language and being close to mom at this age. There are very cool and expensive pop up books and things with lights and sounds – check your favorite museum shop for ideas.
All the Chris Haughton books. Shh, We Have a Plan is our fave but they are all winners. We read it regularly for years, and my son’s 8 and it’s still the occasional bad day comfort read.
Little Blue Truck (the board book kinds so the pages won’t get destroyed)
Indestructibles series (they can be chewed, washed, etc)
Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site (board books)
Picture “dictionaries” that have lots of different pictures they can point to and say the word (board book versions) with bright colors, especially the kind that show other babies’ faces and expressions
Lift the flap books (but be prepared for flaps to get ripped off)
The thing about books is they’re easy to store on a shelf. I’m sure she has a million copies of good night moon, I’d instead get your favorite book from when you were older. I loved the secret garden, and that’s my go-to. You can find a lot of pretty book covers of those old classics too.
My go to books are past Caldecott award winners and nominees. There is a heavy coverage for the books Levar Burton read to us as children on Reading Rainbow. Personal favorites are Blueberries for Sal and the Snowy Day for gifts. Solid books but no ones that everyone gifts. Also, at that age, any texture book is always a hit along with adventures of super heroes. The latter is popular for when dads are in charge of bedtimes
Highly recommend Let’s Find Momo! and related books for that age. They’re fun search and find board books, help build some vocabulary and lets the kids interact with the book, and they’re not super well known, so it’s unlikely she already has them. Just make sure you get the toddler ones, not the adult ones, which are much harder.
Our current favorite is Buffalo Fluffalo–highly recommend. We also love any of the books in the Escargot series.
Sheep in a Jeep
Little Blue Truck (any in the series)
Ferdinand
Chugga Chugga Choo Choo
Knight Owl (not available in board book)
I’m a big fan of board books at this age – young toddlers like to grab and handle the books while you read to them, and this way they’re not so easily destroying the lovely picture books. Sandra Boynton does a lot of terrific board books, and another somewhat obscure (but available on amazon) one that our kids loved was “Who Hops,” which is delightfully absurd.
If you’re looking for something more timeless, my go-to is Shel Silverstein’s Where the Sidewalk Ends.
As a mom knee-deep in babies for a decade, it didn’t occur to me to give toddlers anything but board books! Definitely a good point if you are getting books for baby to enjoy now.
Dr. Seuss board books are always a hit, and anything Sandra Boynton. I also like books that align with the parents’ interests – my husband is a data scientist so my toddler has a bunch of board books about coding.
my hands-down favorite for age 1 is Each Peach Pear Plum.
We also love wimmelbooks.
Don’t push the button series is a huge hit with my younger toddler. It’s a little more interactive, for the kids that have trouble sitting for an entire book.
Definitely get a board book for that age! If you can find it, Everywhere Babies is lovely – babies like looking at other babies.
Knuffle Bunny is adorable.
A Visitor for Bear
The Whale and the Snail
The Gruffalo
Jamberry
Anything by Sandra Boynton
I had to wear a home heart monitor and the adhesive won’t come off my skin. It’s not very irritated, but just really stuck. Any tips for at-home products to help removal?
Mineral oil!
I haven’t used it and can’t recommend it, so I hope you’ll get feedback from people with experience. But I know that there exists a “for skin” version of Goo-Gone!
Best wishes for best case scenario results from the monitoring.
I have even used regular Goo-Gone for removing medical adhesive because I happened to have it on hand. Worked like a charm and washed off in the shower after with no ill effects.
Try an oil to loosen the adhesive. Even olive oil or coconut oil would work.
acetone nail polish remover
This. Or a touch of degreaser, if your skin is not super sensitive to it.
This. Do it in the shower and wash off quickly.
WD-40 gets off most sticky things. (I know, I know, but a little WD-40 never hurt anyone.)
Olive oil.
Rubbing alcohol.
Peanut butter
Rubbing alcohol or acetone.
I just want to say at the outset that I don’t believe for a second that Tylenol causes autism and that there’s a whole lot of fear-mongering going around that we need to push back against. But as the mom of a neurodiverse child, this discussion has been pretty triggering. Although I know my kid’s condition has a strong genetic component, there’s still a teeny-tiny part of me that wonders if it’s my fault because of something I did during pregnancy. And yes, I know how ridiculous I sound, but these thoughts are not always rational.
Honestly even if it’s genetics + epigenetic factors, that doesn’t mean that you had control or are at fault. There are studies on identical twins where one is ND and one is not. That’s part of how we know it’s not 100% genetic, but it also shows that it makes no sense to blame the mom.
I was thinking about that, how awful it must feel to be blamed on top of everything. I know you know, but you did nothing wrong and you’re a great mom.
I relate to that feeling…even though I 100 percent believe childhood and flu vaccines are safe and effective, a part of me always worries when my kids get shots. Even when the warnings are a crock of bull, it’s hard to silence the “what if” voice
As someone who was recently pregnant (and my baby is too young to know about any ND traits yet), the fear keeps nagging because we KNOW that we’re constantly exposed to harmful things and that yes, environmental influences do matter. If they truly didn’t and the baby was in an impermeable bubble for nine months, this whole Tylenol discussion wouldn’t affect us. We worry because we know certain exposures matter to our babies’ health (eg, air pollution) and we can’t always do much about it.
Agreed that these discussions are super triggering. It’s plain old eugenics dressed up as ‘supporting’ kids and parents.
Fwiw my kids are neurodiverse, and I know it’s ‘my’ fault. Why? I’m also neurodivergent, as is my mom, and many of my family members. So…should I not be allowed to have kids? Are my kids who are amazing brilliant people not allowed to exist? This is paving the way for even more discrimination/scapegoating or more of the ‘model minority (disability) storyline where we’re ‘good’ autistics who can hold down jobs and have productive lives. Ugh, we’re truly living in the worst timeline.
I’m really sorry. This all feels terribly unfair to the amazing parents and kids out there who are just trying to do their best. My DH didn’t fully realize he, too, probably had ADHD until our son was diagnosed, and then everything sort of clicked into place. This happens FREQUENTLY. Both my DH and our kiddo are brilliant, hilarious, and have such sharp minds. DH has learned to mask over the years, but DS’s struggles are still very obvious at times. He’s already had a teacher tell him this year that he “doesn’t really believe” in 504 plans for high school students. I was sort of stunned. Like who says that out loud? I don’t think that would’ve been acceptable five years ago.
As a fellow mom of ND kids, I believe an IEP is legally binding and requires a diagnosis, while a 504 is not (and theoretically, anyone could ask for one). So I can see an argument being made that by high school, it’s time for kids to adapt and if they can’t then you need an IEP…but I’m of two minds about it all, as my kids get older
504s are legally binding, and my son does have an official diagnosis. Also, the stuff in his 504 is not that onerous, frankly. Most of it can be managed by him, with the teacher’s awareness.
You’re right, I misspoke. 504s seem more vague and in practice can be less (or not at all) enforceable…but they are both legal contracts for different purposes. I soured a bit on them because everything suggested seemed so general and my 2es are so far acclimating fine, but if you have a specific focus I can see the need
You need a diagnosis of a condition that affects the child’s learning for a 504, and it is theoretically enforceable. The difference between a 504 and an IEP is that a 504 is just for accommodations and an IEP includes services. In practice a 504 is mostly worthless because so many kids have them that teachers don’t have time to provide even the simplest of accommodations.
If you wonder about it being your “fault,” consider what fault means.
I’m assuming that you didn’t drink, smoke, do drugs, eat nothing but fried Oreos, etc. You probably went to most or all of your prenatal appointments, took your multivitamins, drank lots of water, avoided doing things like skydiving.
So you did everything right, because you did the best you could with the information you had at the time.
And I avoided lunch meat and a million other things. But I also took Zofran because I was vomiting 7-8 times a day and basically non-functional during the first trimester and part of the second. Now Zofran is looked down upon. But what was I supposed to do? Not work and go to the hospital for IV fluids every day? IDK. I hate where we are right now!
Wait, what’s wrong with Zofran now?
It isn’t about what is known about Zofran now; it’s what was known then.
At the time, you made the decision that was the best one you could make.
“Had I known” isn’t something to beat yourself up over. You *didn’t* know, and it wasn’t because you didn’t try to know.
Severe morning sickness can cause its own set of problems. You would have been trading one set of problems for another set of problems. That isn’t doing anything wrong!
I’m a nurse and I also took Zofran for severe morning sickness. I also used Tylenol for pain relief during both pregnancies for surgical procedures, got vaccinated for flu and Tdap, my kids are fully vaccinated and both neurotypical. Anecdotes are not data, but I hate to think there are parents out there depriving themselves of safe medical care because of fear from unscientific claims. Good rule- if someone can’t pronounce the medication, they shouldn’t be telling physicians not to recommend it!
There’s an uncomfortable conversation to be had about the relationship between promoting prenatal vitamins and eugenics. We take the vitamins to prevent “defects.”
Isn’t the worst case neural tube defect anencephaly (i.e., brain doesn’t develop?) Seems like something you would want to avoid….
Oh absolutely. It’s my comment and I took prenatal vitamins and would again. But there’s no doubt about WHY we do it.
Could it be simply because we want our children to avoid preventable harm, and not because we are prejudiced against or look down upon people with disabilities? Because to me, that’s why we’d take prenatal vitamins. I don’t want to lose my arm in a workplace accident because I want my freaking arm, not because I’m secretly eugenics or prejudiced against people missing limbs.
Sure, but it’s saying that preventing disability in children is good. A lot of people would have a problem with that statement.
You’re 100% making up the idea that people have a problem with the idea of preventing disability through meeting needs. No one has a problem with meeting people’s needs and thereby preventing disability.
“Sure, but it’s saying that preventing disability in children is good.”
The “why” matters here. You cannot possibly be this dense. Maybe these people who have a problem with this statement could think a little deeper.
Then you and I don’t run in the same circles. There is a HUGE social movement now to completely redefine autism as NOT a disability. A mother of two kids with severe autism wrote a wonderful, thought-provoking article about the many problems with that. Look up Jill Escher. Excerpt from her piece:
“The examples are everywhere. The leading autism conference, INSAR (International Society for Autism Research), which once focused on serious-minded biological research, has drifted into something of a celebration of neurodiversity. In this reality distortion field, Lee Wachtel, MD, medical director of the Neurobehavioral Unit at Kennedy Krieger Institute in Baltimore, which treats hundreds of autism patients, said to a group of us parents, “I work in a war zone, but here at INSAR you’d think autism was a celebration.”
Journals regularly publish papers by language-policing neurodiversity advocates urging a purge of common and useful terminology like deficit or disorder so as to reduce supposed stigma associated with autism. Even the leading autism journal now suggests authors avoid ordinary terms like disruptive behaviors or challenging behaviors, saying the journal is “decreasing the number of accepted articles focusing solely on weaknesses, problems, and deficits”—even though the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) defines autism by its very evident impairments. Apparently we are supposed to see our children, many of whom are among the most critically disabled people on the planet, as disabled only by a society that fails to understand them, and not by any biological deficit.”
No, there isn’t an uncomfortable conversation to be had, you nutbar.
Preventing harm isn’t the same thing as wanting to exterminate people who suffer that harm. I can want to protect my son’s spine and also treat people in wheelchairs with all the grace and dignity they deserve.
That isn’t how many prominent autism rights advocates view it. I may not agree with it, but I think that their viewpoint deserves consideration – that saying we should “prevent” autism is saying “people like them shouldn’t exist.” This is easily Google-able with the will to do so.
No, it isn’t saying that people like them shouldn’t exist. That’s not how logic works.
No. Not every viewpoint needs to be indulged. And the original comment that spawned this dreadful threat was much broader than just autism.
If the way of “preventing” autism is prenatal genetic testing, they have a point!
If the way of “preventing” autism is inclusive, accessible educational spaces, informed healthcare, adequate nutrition, to the point where a child may not clearly meet criteria for diagnosis, that’s just helping out autistic people. This comes up sometimes for example in the world of high resource home schooling or alternative schooling where the same child might present very differently to assessors if attending a low resource conventional school.
All Brains Belong is a good “by autistic people, for autistic people” resource on the sometimes significant health issues a subset of autistic people are more likely to be dealing with. It is a good thing to prevent needless suffering, even when that suffering presents autistically.
There’s absolutely nothing uncomfortable about accepting that everyone needs complete nutrition for health (!!).
There’s a world of difference between being neurotypical and wanting to prevent something as devastating as brain and spinal cord defects! I don’t see this being in the same category at all.
Same
There’s a lot of overlap. Choline intake during pregnancy, for example, is touted for its beneficial effects on child attention span and memory, which is a world away from devastating spinal cord defect.
Everyone agrees that women should get adequate choline intake during pregnancy and in general. Nobody advocates for malnutrition. Feeding people is good! Nutritional deficiencies are bad and harmful!
Maybe the uncomfortable thing is that it’s sometimes hard to distinguish ASD clinically from different types of damage? That is not that uncomfortable to me; lots of people are living with different types of medical conditions that have caused them some kind of harm.
Yeah. I think it depends on whether you consider autism a harm or a superpower.
There’s never really been a dichotomy. There have always been stories about the bold or creative accomplishments of people with dyslexia or with epilepsy or even people who recently survived a stroke(!). Disability, illness, injury, recovery are part of life for most people and can come with insights or opportunities as well as suffering; it’s just how things are.
A huge hug. I feel this instinct often with my kids and I don’t have lunatics yelling about it in press conferences. It’s not your fault and you’re a great mom.
And cleft lips are linked to zofran.
I wonder if women will be guilted about zofran next?
There’s a tension between the idea that adverse health things are something that just happens randomly to some subset of people for no reason vs. adverse health things are always somebody’s fault.
MAHA has a strong drive to make sure that health things are blamed on the person experiencing them or at minimum on their parents, vs. accepting that some subset of people have health conditions randomly and we have a responsibility to take care of people who experience them. After all if its the latter, we have to spend money as a society on social programs and supports.
There is essentially no credible evidence linking tylenol to autism or neurodiversity- but if there is, then we have someone to blame and don’t have to do the work of making a better society.
That’s not what MAHA is doing but okay.
There is more health supremacy and just world fallacy in the MAHA world than they’re staying ahead of.
I saw a great post on FB from an autism mom about how angry she is, how this does nothing to help the 1 in 31 children with autism, their caregivers or their parents. Truly what if we spent the money on raising caregiver pay, developing resources etc.? That’s where we should point our outrage about this. we all know its a sham, all parents of ND kids know it changes nothing for them or their kids’ lives.
But don’t you know we only care about babies yet to be born, not making life better for the people already here?
Like everything, this is split down political lines…all the MAHA autism moms I’m seeing online are praising this in some way (often tripping over themselves to not say the thing) – yay funding, finally someone cares! Pay no attention to all that other funding that’s been cut
interestingly, the mom who posted it is very MAGA, was posting Erika Kirk videos on Sunday. I know i’m in a mostly liberal bubble, but have lots of conservative friends/family and have seen none of them post or care about this announcement. I think it’s going over like a lead balloon.
I’m so sorry. This is so upsetting and unnecessary.
I totally agree (also a mom to an autistic kid). I know it’s mostly genetics, and know my kid has a microdeletion that we are so so lucky that autism is the only symptom he’s obviously suffering from — other kids with the same deletion are deaf, or have heart or growth problems, or more. but the only way we know that is because we paid $3500 for a test. i also definitely believe that autism has been around for a long time, but maybe didn’t matter as much when we lived in more rural communities with a slower pace. also, the earlier parenting styles (FAFO) probably also meant a lot of kids drowned or otherwise died in ways that the parenting styles of today are preventing.
that said — i was reading the article on parkinson’s and how if you live less than a mile from a golf course, your odds are 2x higher of getting parkinson’s b/c of the pesticides they use on their lawn. we lived 1/2 mile for one when i was 13-18 — it could have been those pesticides. it could have been something environmental when MY mother had me in her belly and I was developing eggs. (I forget how but it’s even possible to blame the grandmother, isn’t it?)
We are starting to think about planning our honeymoon in Japan. I’m thinking two weeks at the end of May 2026. I’ve never been to Asia and just started looking at flight. Any tips or suggestions? Airlines to avoid or must sees while in Japan?
There was a related thread the other day:
https://corporette.com/envelope-neck-ponte-dress/#comment-4733899
My recommendation would be to look at the weather – end of May can be already very hot and humid in the south of Japan, so if you’re planning on flying into one city and roadtripping/shinkansen to another city to fly out, plan your itinerary accordingly.
Regarding airlines, we have flown JAL and ANA – both were okay for us, but some people have a strong preference/aversion. If you fly business class, I think it’s less of an issue.
I think the conventional wisdom is that JAL and ANA are superior to AA and United but I don’t really agree with that. It probably depends on how much you like Asian food. If you want to eat something other than noodles for breakfast, the US carriers are better.
The flight attendants on the US carriers are so rude.
My stomach has been a little off for a few weeks (recovering from surgery, cold, recovering from cold, etc.) and all I want to eat are bland foods like bagels or cereal. I don’t like cooking and usually do a meal delivery service, but the foods have been grossing me out recently. Got any good suggestions for easy, bland foods that I can focus on until I’m back to normal? It would also be great if I could get more protein than just cream cheese and milk, but my stomach doesn’t seem to want meat either. TIA!
yogurt
eggs
hummus or other bean dips
peanut butter
Eggs?
Sorry this is totally yucking someone else’s yum, but eggs are truly one of the last things I want to eat when my stomach feels off. Just goes to show you we all have appetites for different things!
OP – What about a smoothie with protein powder? I know it is different than your situation, but when I was pregnant and had morning sickness, I found smoothies to be tolerable (and sometimes even appealing).
Haha yes I find eggs pretty unappetizing at the best of times. Sometimes when I’m in the mood for ketchup I will scramble some (because I know they are so healthy) and slather them in ketchup. They are also always my first pregnancy aversion, along with coffee
When I had hyperemesis, one of the few foods I could keep down was poached eggs on toast.
Peanut butter toast and popcorn usually hit the spot when nothing else sounds good.
I know you said no meat, but sometimes a plan McDonald’s burger with fries is my re-entry meal after I’m sick.
Beans and rice? Tofu?
When I feel like that I usually make packaged ramen with some edamame and maybe a boiled egg. It is a comfort food with some protein thrown in.
When I feel this way I usually handle cold (or room temperature) foods with very little smell. For some reason I can almost always tolerate beef before pork/chicken. Tofu is always a hard no for me but if you can eat it that’s a great option. Otherwise:
Apples/celery and peanut butter
Apples, carrots, crackers and hard cheese (cheese sticks are usually most palatable, then something like a mild cheddar).
Quesadillas with mild cheddar
Yogurt with nuts, honey, and fruit
Homemade oatmeal with milk and stewed fruits
When I was pregnant and queasy cold spaghetti with bolognese was relatively appealing. Ditto for peanut noodles. But cold!
My go to is pierogies, and if you can find them – pyrizhky. I’m sure there is a scientific explanation (not just “it’s the old ways”) but sauerkraut and bread seem to help for me. If you are up for a little meat, matzo ball soup. If you just need calories, toast with peanut butter and Nutella.
Baked potato
A mild soup, like chicken and rice, or potato
And very individual to me: I start wanting a meal of toast made with a hearty bread, a cold orange, and walnuts.
When I’m sick, I eat precooked rice/lentil mix with Trader Joe’s boxed miso ginger broth and a splash of lemon juice.
My go-to is a simple smoothie w/ greek yogurt, frozen berries, and frozen banana. Will add spinach, nut butter, etc if I feel like it. Seems to always agree with my stomach.
Protein shake
I tend to eat turkey sandwiches and Chinese dumplings in broth in this scenario. The dumplings appeal to me because of the ginger (I add extra in the broth), which I associate with settling the stomach, but perhaps that is too much flavor for you
30 years ago in law school I threw caution to the wind and wore an interview suit in this same check. I loved that suit.
Did you get the job??
I did! NYC biglaw. Not at all what I do now.
What do you say in a job interview when they ask you why you’re leaving your current job, and the real reason is because you haven’t gotten a raise in 4 years and you applied for an internal promotion and worked your ass off to get it, and then it was given to an external person who is beyond incompetent and you can’t stand to work for them anymore?
You’re looking for new opportunities for growth.
(And I’m sorry all this happened to you.)
You’d like to stay with the same organization long term and your current company doesn’t have the growth opportunities you’re looking for.
You are interested in growth and your current company does not have capacity to support that.
“After 4 years in the same role, I’m ready for the next challenge and to grow into the next thing. This role offers XYZ that I don’t have in my current role, which seems like a great fit with what I’m looking for.” Never ever badmouth your prior role; always make it about how great the new opportunity is.
+1 don’t answer “why you want to leave” answer “why does this next job appealing”
I love how there’s consensus on this thread!
Anyone ever order a formal dress from JJ’s House? What’s the quality compared to? Any experiences?
I have saved my money and purchased on Poshmark for half price. Its 1-2 wears clothing.
I’ve ordered several flower girl dresses from there. Quality is not great, but not terrible. The construction is fine, but the fabric is pretty low quality. They photograph well though. I would never order from there unless a bride told me to.
Obviously you are not going to get good quality for those prices. Save your time and money and go elsewhere.
What are everyone’s thoughts about a potential shut down? I think Dems need to do it. I don’t even think healthcare should be the line in the sand, they just need to stop everything. But I’ve only read Nate Silver and Ezra Klein so I’m curious for others thoughts.
Congress has one job: make the government run.
There are thousands of hourly workers who won’t get paid. How will they make their mortgage? Car note? Some banks will give a grace period in this situation, but not all. And not all workers will get back pay when the government does reopen – the military always does, but contractors like congressional cafeteria workers don’t always.
The shutdown hurts federal employees. And after all of the shenanigans with this admin this year, the employees still with the government do not deserve another shutdown. Especially the ones that will still have to work during it and wait to get paid. Further, the unions that made sure these employees were compensated correctly are now gone.
I’m going to argue that a shutdown is like a drop in the bucket after this admins shenanigans.
Any suggestions for similar jackets with a bit more stretch? I miss WFH clothes and cannot get through a day in stiff office attire.
Looking for inspiration. Any larger pear-shaped ladies have a great fall office wardrobe piece you love? My office style needs a refresh, and while I really like today’s pick, this neckline and the overall shape never works for me.
I bought the burgundy version of this sweater from JCF and love it. It’s a normal length, not cropped on my 5’8″ self.
https://factory.jcrew.com/p/womens/categories/clothing/sweaters/cardigans/striped-collared-sweater-jacket/CN110?display=standard&fit=Classic&color_name=vintage-burg-ant-navy-s&colorProductCode=CN110
Has anyone taken or is on or has parents on Metaformin (pill for T2 diabetes)? I’ve heard that there can be some GI side effects but my doctor says that it’s OK starting on a low dose and then increasing. Diet and exercise help, but I need to move the needle more / faster and will be getting the Rx later today. Welcoming any and all advice (like: maybe don’t do it and go on a 5 hour plane ride the first week; beware of conferences; sleep issues; anything else I’m not thinking of). I’m new in the T2 world. Not looking to lose weight, if that matters; concerned about any loss of focus or energy or sleep.
Manufacturer does matter (especially if it’s time release, since FDA doesn’t require full equivalency of time release formulation as opposed to active ingredient). If you get a lot of GI side effects that don’t ease up after you get used to the med, it is entirely possible that you would not get the same side effects from the name brand or just a different manufacturer that agrees with you better. So just don’t give up on it prematurely if you have a rough time at first!
If hyping it up helps you, there’s a lot of Metformin hype out there since the side effects appear to be things like “living longer and in better health” even though the people who take it were starting at a disadvantage.
I take 850mg twice a day with no GI issues. I started with a lower dose.
It’s been a wonderful medication for me. I hope it doesn’t cause you GI issues.
OP here. So if I had to judge a high school debate tournament, where I may get a 5-minute break every hour between rounds, no GI issues making that iffy? [I’m one of those people who doesn’t tolerate sorbitol — envisioning anything like that.] Foods to avoid? Trying to speed read the interwebs, but it’s likely that how a med is with women is understudied for what goes into package inserts.
I feel like a science experiment sometimes.
Ask your pharmacist.
Seriously, ask the pharmacist instead of a bunch of internet weirdos.
I was off and on Metformin for about a year until I couldn’t handle the GI issues any longer. I had multiple occasions where I thought I was not going to make it to a bathroom in time and had frequent daily bouts of diarrhea. Some commenters clearly had no GI issues, which is great for them but that drug was the absolute worst for me (and I tried different versions and doses to no avail). There’s no way to predict how you will handle it, so try it for a week when you can largely be home and near a bathroom and see how you do.
Did you also try name brand Glucophage? That was the best one for me, and it’s so frustrating to me that insurance hates to cover name brand. (Especially after the recalls!)
I had to ask for the extended release Metformin and that helped any side effects I had. The doctor did not originally prescribe the extended release.
Yeah it was pretty chill. Just start gradually and if going up causes sides effects stay at the lower dose an extra week. The side effect is too much pooping not lack of
Focus so I’d pick a home week to start it just in case.
If you had 4 days (Friday – Monday) to take a trip somewhere from the Bay Area, where would you go? Been to San Diego/LA and Seattle too many times. With 2 kids (ages 7 and 10). Is NOLA kid friendly?
Portland, Seattle, Vancouver
New Orleans is great for kids, but you would be spending two whole days flying.
Big Sur, easily. Kids love the woods.
Agree with this. And maybe a day or two in Monterey or Santa Cruz. Or, depending on the time of year, I’d go to Yosemite.
Sunriver, OR is great for kids.
upscale dude ranch in CO?
I would not recommend leaving the Bay Area to go visit the Gulf Coast.
Agreed with Yosemite, and stay at the Evergreen Lodge, it’s so cute.
Santa Fe? Vegas? Phoenix?
Fly to Phoenix and go to Sedona? Denver + Rockies? Chicago? San Antonio?
NOLA can be kid friendly, but I don’t think that flight and length of time make sense for a kid trip to NOLA. Most kid trips to NOLA involve some the zoo, walking around the French Quarter, riding the trolley, and beignets. There are also some swamp tours outside of NOLA that would probably be fun with kids. My favorite parts of NOLA are the music and restaurants, which you likely wouldn’t be getting a ton of with kids that age. So, yes, you could do a NOLA trip with kids…. but I don’t think it would be worth it from the Bay Area. Would potentially be worth it from SEUS or East Coast.
Maybe Zion? I’d say Yosemite but the park mismanagement (not just due to Trump) is horrific right now. Most of the hotels are affected by serious safety issues.
My Bay Area friends like to go to Cabo for long weekends.
I have clear, standout memories of both Monterey and Yosemite from a trip at 10 yrs old. My older sister, as well.
Perfect age for Disneyland. Also love Vancouver (aquarium and easy bike trail around stanley park, science museum, granville island, etc.)
Paging the NYC poster who visited Scanlan Theodore – would you say it’s worth a trip? Or was the in store selection limited?
I’ve got about 3 hours to kill in NY on Friday in between meetings and was debating on going down to Soho or just hitting up Saks as their friends and family sale is on.