Suit of the Week: Paul Smith
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For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional. Also: we just updated our big roundup for the best women's suits of 2025!
I don't know that I've ever seen a sea green suit like this Paul Smith one before. It's not quite a light blue, not quite a mint green — I like it.
I love the fact that the suit is wool, and the pink polka dot lining is a lot of fun.
The sea green suiting pieces are $425-$695.
Sales of note for 5/14/25:
- Nordstrom Rack – Looking for a deal on a Dyson hairdryer? The Rack has several refurbished ones for $199-$240 (instead of $400+) — but they're final sale only.
- Ann Taylor – Suit Yourself! 30% off suiting (ends 5/16) + 25% off your full price purchase (ends 5/18) + extra 60% off sale (ends 5/14)
- Talbots – 40% off all markdowns (ends 5/18) + 30% off dresses, skirts, accessories, and shoes
- Nordstrom – Beauty Deals up to 25% off (ends 5/17)
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 25% off
- Boden – 10% off new women's styles with code + sale up to 50% off
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything + extra 60% off sale + $1 shipping on all orders
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off long-weekend styles + 50% off select swim and coverups
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 50% off clearance + extra 15% off $100+ + extra 20% off $125+
- M.M.LaFleur – Lots of twill suiting on sale! Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off.
- Rothy's – Up to 50% off last-chance styles
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
How old is the mattress on the bed that you sleep on every night?
3 years old.
Just a few years old, but the warranty is 25 year and I’ve happily slept on mattresses that old before, so I hope it’s as well made as those were!
Roughly 15. Spring mattress from a local manufacturer and we flip it when we remember to.
10 years old
+1
+2.
Same, but it spent half of its life as a guest room mattress.
Five. But it’s been moved twice which has probably shortened its lifespan already.
3-4 years old. The one previous to this one lasted about 10 years, with a change of mattress topper once. The current one will probably last 15-25, with a couple of changes of mattress topper.
11 years old
So old I can’t remember, but I still feel like it’s the best sleep I’ve gotten anywhere (whenever I travel I miss my own bed) so I am in no hurry to replace it.
How often are we supposed to replace mattresses? Now I’m wondering if I should be keeping better track!
11ish. We were just talking about looking for a replacement the next sale cycle.
3 and so comfortable, but kids have peed on it so many times it’ll be replaced soon.
1 year. But our prior mattress was 11 years old.
13 years. It’s a non-flippable latex foam mattress that we now have on a platform frame (no box spring). We rotate the mattress a few times a year but the bottom is rigid and not intended to be flipped. I would like to replace it because it has developed body indents where we sleep, but it is still reasonably comfortable and not causing us any issues.
Almost 6 and I expect it to last a long time. It is latex.
I just did the math and my last (traditional spring) mattress was 23 y.o. when I finally tossed it. It was in pretty good shape until the last three years and I guess I prioritized buying my house and other furniture and repairs over a new bed at that time.
Purchased in 2013. Very firm latex mattress. We don’t flip it or adjust it in any way. It sits on a platform. It is extremely heavy. It feels the same firmness as when we first slept on it. Other than its weight making it difficult to move, it is practically perfect in every way.
Maybe 6 months old? I splurged on a “fancy” mattress and I am absolutely obsessed with it. My previous mattress was a 12 year old cheapie.
We got a sleep number at the end of last year, so about 6 months. It’s much better than our old mattress. I only wish I’d sprung for the adjustable mattress!
10 years, that’s when we moved into our house and bought new mattresses for both our room and our guest room.
What are your favorite pick-me-ups?
Long walk with an ice cold fresh lemonade and a baseball game on the radio (in my headphones) on a path overlooking the ocean.
Same but podcast and river.
Where do you live? This sounds out of a Nancy Meyers movie.
Outside of San Diego!
I love listening to baseball games on the radio. I am doing it now from my windowless office, but will be with you in spirit this summer when I can listen on the shores of Lake Michigan.
Buying stuff (unfortunately).
Laying in bed with a flight of pastries and a good book.
Taking a real lunch break to read a book
Sitting on my porch watching the birds and butterflies
Going to an ice cream stand
An empty gym or an empty pool.
Getting out to the beach on a calm early morning before folks arrive. Inhaling the salty air. Listening to the waves, and watching the occasional passerby with his/her dog.
catching up with a friend, puttering in the garden, BBQ potato chips
Good conversation with a friend.
Coffee, hot or cold, or an iced milk tea with grass jelly. Pilates class. Spending time with my husband, or even just being in the same room doing our own thing. My cats. Hanging out with friends and family. Reading a good murder mystery, or listening to an audiobook with a narrator I really enjoy. Eating a vanilla almond chocolate Haagan Daz ice cream bar. Drinking sparkling water. Going to all you can eat Hot Pot.
Tiramisu
(pick me up is the literal translation)
Putzing in the garden.
It’s not an immediate pick me up, but it mellows out my mood for the rest of the day.
Yoga. A nap. Taking something (closet, junk drawer, etc.) and re-organizing/cleaning it.
Car wash, then cleaning and vacuuming it out.
Buying plane tickets
I’m in a complicated personal situation and seeking advice. This is complex, so please forgive the long post.
My husband and I have been married for 1.5 years, in our mid-30s. He is one of 7, with 6 sisters, and grew up poor in a neighboring state, about 80 mins away from where we live now. When we got together, my husband tried to coordinate me meeting his parents–we offered to go out there and take them to dinner, bring takeout to the house, whatever they preferred beyond those options–but they always said they were too busy, it wouldn’t work out. Eventually my husband became frustrated and upset by this, and ultimately they were not invited to our wedding. They have never expressed any upset about that reality.
My husband has a complicated relationship with some of his sisters, too. One sister tried to set him up with a friend a few months into us dating (literally picked him up one day “to take him to coffee for his birthday,” but then picked up her friend and Shanghai’d him into a weird set up situation), and as a result he cut off contact with that sister, blocked her on all platforms and on his cell.
His parents are older, late 70s. His mother previously was ill with breast cancer, but was in remission. 14 months ago, a sister told my husband their mother had another lump discovered–but he was told not to tell any other siblings. His family is constantly brokering who gets to know what, and often does not share information with the 2 siblings who have moved out of state. My husband and I have speculated that this seemed to be to punish him and his other out-of-state sister for moving away.
We welcomed our first child 5 months ago. Since then, my husband’s mother would text me–candidly–very weird things. That she loves me and the baby, that I’m such a good mom–despite that we’ve never met or spoken. I was simply gracious and kind in return, and I would sometimes send photos of my husband and the baby to her. My take on it was–she’s just an old lady, and ultimately she’s the mother of my favorite man on this earth. Why not be nice?
Last Friday, my husband’s blocked-sister called my cell phone. I had no idea how she had my number. I learned she took it from her mother’s phone. We learned his mother was in the hospital and did not have long. We were told it was new cancer–not her breast cancer–and everyone was blindsided. My husband made it out the following morning to see his mother before she passed. He had about 14 hours’ notice. We learned later that day that, in fact, it was her breast cancer; it had been back for 1 year, since the lump; she had been in treatment for a year; and the family had intentionally not shared this information with my husband or his other out-of-state sister.
My husband is more devastated than he or I anticipated, but it is understandable given the circumstances. He has now taken the position he wants to attend all services alone, without me. He says it is to protect me. I want to be as supportive as I can be during this time. I feel it is a mistake that he go alone, and I’ve voiced that, but he’s sticking to his original choice and I think I have to respect that. But in all honesty–I am struggling very hard with it. We have a wonderful marriage and we have always, always done all things as a team. I am struggling with feeling like now this space exists between us, but I know I need to respect his grief. Any recommendations, suggestions, or just words of support?
My (now-ex) husband came from a disastrous family that similarly kept secrets and played family members off each other. When his (abusive, horrible) father passed away, he had a very similar reaction to your husband’s. He didn’t want me to help plan his travel across country to the funeral, and he didn’t want me to attend. I didn’t understand it, but I come from a loving and functional family and couldn’t possibly comprehend what he was going through. My advice is to accept his assessment of what he needs and offer as much love and support as you can, with no judgment. The pain of losing a parent is bad enough, but his pain is compounded in ways that require whatever coping strategies he can muster.
+1
Agree.
Yikes this is all so strange and hard! Provided you trust your husband not to throw you under buses (which it sounds like you do), I would respect his wishes and let him go alone. I personally can underhand why he’d make that choice…having this be your first time meeting his family adds a whole layer, when he needs to focus on grieving however feels right.
I’d restate your availability and desire to support him, then let it go. If he wants to reconsider, he’ll tell you
He may be wanting to protect you from all of the drama and/or protect you from siblings. Agree with the other poster that you should be as supportive as possible, while respecting his wish to deal with this on his own. Being there and supporting him while giving him his space seems like the best way forward. Hugs to you.
Esp since you have a very young child.
This was my thought as well. His sister stole your phone number so he knows his family is willing to put you in the middle of things. The emotional effort he’ll spend protecting you outweighs the benefit of your support.
Let him do what he thinks is right and support him emotionally however you can. Don’t take it personally and don’t think about your relationship or what it means for your level of closeness.
I am your husband in this scenario. This whole situation is very stressful for him, and to have you there would make it more stressful. Respect his wishes.
This way he can go, he doesn’t have to explain all the ways his family is weird, he doesn’t have to apologize for the rude things they might say to you, he doesn’t have to manage your relationship with these people.
Give him normalcy and an escape from the grief – send him cute pictures of the baby, do a facetime with him at night if he wants.
I had the same reaction as the husband here. This is a sad and intense situation. It stinks you’re also caught up in it, but please be there for your husband in the way he’s asked. If you don’t come from a similarly dysfunctional dynamic, I think it’s really hard or impossible to understand.
Good thoughts to you both.
This is my take on the situation too.
This is intense, OP. As someone who moved to a small city for work, it was quite educational as a big city person:
(1) People from families with broad, deep roots can take it very personally when someone moves away because it’s so uncommon. I had a coworker who literally had over 100 cousins and his family had been in the region for many generations. Another person who married into a well-known local family referred to it as like joining a cult in some ways. Also, it can be very hard for some people to let go and accept change. They like their traditional practices and expect everyone else to participate as well. It can be hard to accept that your grown children are not all visiting for every holiday because of other family obligations or they live too far away.
(2) People can be quite raw during times of grief. Their filters are gone. Your husband may be trying to protect you from rude comments or behavior from his family. You can still support him via phone/text/video chat while he is away, as well as before he leaves and after he returns. He may anticipate that he won’t have the energy to protect or defend you in the same way he usually does regarding his family. Not everyone handles grief in the same way, and hopefully things will go reasonably smoothly during his trip.
This is also a difficult time for him because Mother’s Day just passed. I wish you and yours the best. –a person with 2 deceased parents.
First of all, I am sorry that you are going through this and from this internet stranger, I know it’s tough on so many levels. Practical advice that has worked in my family in similar situations. Book a hotel, not optional unless he has a friend that you would trust to take care of him. If you can swing it, this is one of the times where the club level at a fancy hotel really comes into its own so you are not stuck in your room in the evening (they also generally have alcohol too). Also, make sure he is not relying on family for anything – either rental car or Uber. Consider if it is an option for you to go with him, stay at the hotel but not go to any of the services. Frame it solely as I don’t want you in the hotel at night by yourself, and he might want kiddo cuddles. Short version, light money on fire to make the trip for the services as comfortable as possible, then think about some therapy afterwards.
it sounds like you never met her in person?
I agree with your husband – and it’s not your place to push back on his decision. It’s already incredibly hard & emotionally complicated, having you there means he needs to be (and sounds like would!) in protector mode, etc. You don’t really know these people, trust his judgment. Gently, it’s selfish to make this moment about your feelings & marriage, instead of about him losing a parent, however complex that relationship was.
+1 My first thought upon finishing reading was, “It’s not about you.”
me too. in the nicest way, because I think you have good intentions about wanting to be there for your husband. but you don’t know these people like he does, and if he wants to process his grief at the funeral only with his siblings and other people who knew his mom well, that makes sense to me. you’ll be there when he comes home.
Agree with the others. It sounds like you went along with him handling his family’s shenanigans when his mom was alive, and you should also let him take the lead now. Grief makes everything so much more complicated, and this was a messy situation to begin with. Be supportive to your husband, and lean on your own support system when you need to vent.
Ooof – I had a very similar situation where I am the one with the weird emotionally stunted family and my father recently passed away. My husband ended up coming to his funeral, mostly to handle our two elementary school aged kids. However, if I could have done it alone, I would have – and I get how that makes no sense to anyone else. I wouldn’t have had to explain why one of his brothers/my uncle didn’t attend the funeral. I wouldn’t have had to explain why another uncle got mad at me when he asked if he was in the will and I didn’t want to respond. I wouldn’t have had to be embarrassed about being literally the only person in my family who could pay the lunch reception bill. Family is complex! Let him be ok in his situation and be grateful you ended up with the normal kid from the family.
Agree that this is one of those moments where you have to put your spouse’s greater need ahead of your own. But I don’t think your feelings are bad or weird! My husband does not want as much comfort or support from me during hard times as I would have expected or as I want from him. When tough family situations have come up his first reaction is usually to want alone time. I don’t love that. I’ve never told my husband that and I definitely support him how he wants to be supported. But it is different from how I expected it to be and a part of me is sad he doesn’t want comfort from me.
The date things is annoying but I would let that go as maybe she didn’t understand how serious he was with you.
Not surprised about the lack of disclosure around illness. Some people really really struggle with that especially in a recurrence situation when they are older. Sometimes it’s because they don’t want treatment again and want to avoid pressure to take treatment. Or worry about far away relatives spending money to come home. My MIL had a very close friend who could not acknowledge her cancer even on her deathbed. It was very hard for MIL and especially hard on her friend’s husband. Some people really struggle to deal with illness and death.
I’m glad you have the nice memories of her interest in your child. I would maybe print off or otherwise save the texts to save for your child as there won’t be a lot of other connection.
Follow your DH’s lead on the funeral. The baby is likely an easy reason to skip without offending people. You can visit in the future when emotions are more settled.
Finally – grief counseling for your DH. Look up some names for him. Wait until after the funeral to raise it. My DH lost his dad in his early 20s and didn’t do grief counseling for almost a decade but it was so beneficial when he started.
I’m sure this all comes from a good place, but this type of reasoning is so invalidating for people who actually come from these types of families. The OP has explained why the dynamic was toxic, and her husband seemingly agrees. A person on the outside could excuse the family’s bad behavior all day because, the situations as described here are presumably just the tip of the iceberg. To not be invited to a wedding, it was way more out of hand than simply not knowing how serious they were.
He cut off the one sister after the friend set up which happened within the first few months of dating. Many people are not immediately exclusive so I don’t find that super shocking and the not inviting the parents to the wedding was a separate later thing.
Obviously there is a lot going on here but labelling everyone toxic for not behaving how you or OP think they should have behaved is not helpful. It’s super super common for older people to not be open about medical info, especially if poorer and medical costs may be a factor.
Okay sure but hiding the medical info is far from the only thing going on here.
I suffered abuse from parents who people thought were just quirky or annoying in harmless ways. OP and her husband have much more insight into these specific people than any of us, and they have clearly decided the dynamic is not okay. It’s hurtful for others to invalidate those experiences is my point.
I totally get where you’re coming from, and I totally get where your husband is coming from. There are some great insights from other commentors why your husband asked you not to come, and they’re probably right. You being there is just another thing for him to stress about in an already very stressful situation. I know it feels like you’re not doing anything to help, but poviding a sense of normalcy is a difficult task that you can do that actually is helping, if that’s a useful reframing for you.
This woman was a psycho towards you. This isn’t about your marriage it’s about his insane family and you’re better off staying out of it.
Is he going to get a hotel room for the services? If so, maybe you could go and stay in the hotel. You could be there for him in the evenings and be his safe place. And if things are better than expected then you’ll be right there to attend things with him.
I think it helps that you have the baby as a kind of armor. Families are usually pretty happy to see babies, everyone will be focused on little one and not really on you or the past weirdness.
Where exactly are you all working in 2025 where you get to wear chic suits like this on the regular? Working from home for the last four years I’ve just been wearing pajamas 24/7, and while I wouldn’t say I’m unhappy with my life BECAUSE of my wardrobe, I would be much happier if I worked in a business formal office. Do those still exist?
Could you meet yourself in the middle somewhere, and get some “real” clothes that work for your current life but are a step up from what you’ve been wearing for the past four years?
It’s a grass is greener type thing. I need to participate in a command performance meeting on Friday and I am dreading figuring out what to wear.
I can’t spend this much money on a suit, but I would consider a cheaper one. I was recently at a national conference in DC with ~1,000 attendees and lots of women were wearing suits like this. I actually felt super underdressed in separates.
I work in a dress for your day law office and I wear suits like this because it’s fun. I could wear jeans or casual clothes if I wanted to, but I don’t. I save some of my more fun outfits for office days because I have some pretty rural clients who I feel I should dress more conservatively for when I meet them on site.
I am in a business casual office 3 days a week and I wear full suits at least once a week. Sometimes it is for court, but often just because I like the simplicity of suits. I have some staid black/navy/grey but also some fun colors.
I’m a conference speaker next week and just tried on a great green suit from Talbots. They had a dark pink I considered too. Especially amidst a sea of navy-suit-wearing gentlemen, a pop of color stands out!
I wear fun suits when I speak at conferences. My job involves a trip to speak about once every month or two. A lot of the speeches are on video. So I use it as an excuse to probably buy more than I should. The rest of my work life is Wfh. So I’m rarely in anything other than jeans or track pants. I sometimes feel sad that I finally have a business formal wardrobe built, but no office to wear it to. But not that sad.
I’d love to get a new summer fragrance. Looking for something citrusy and light. Would love your recommendations. Bonus if it gives “Summer in Italy” vibes.
Ugh, don’t ask that here. You’re going to get a pile on that you shouldn’t assault anyone else like with your scent.
That day was a wild ride! I laughed, I cried, I was concerned for peoples’ mental health.
I’ve never heard of this firm anti-fragrance stance in real life. Most people I know wear one spritz of perfume or cologne to work (gasp!)
I’ve worked in fragrance-free offices before, so I know it’s a thing. But I honestly wonder if there’s at least some misunderstanding over higher quality vs. cheaper products. I get a migraine if I’m anywhere near an air freshener or a Bath & Body Works or the laundry aisle of a store. But I’ve enjoyed sampling scents at an actual perfumery. And I’m annoyed by men who reek of cologne, but it doesn’t give me a headache. (I say men because I’ve not in an office setting encountered women who drench themselves in scent to that degree.) So I wonder how many people are sensitive to nice perfume that costs real money vs. other strongly scented products? But there must be people more sensitive than me out there too.
I really liked the new Jo Malone Frangipani scent when I tested it at Sephora!
Wish Clementine California was still around; their citrus scents were my go-tos for summer.
Acqua di Parma Colonia
I don’t go for citrusy myself, so no rec, but whenever I’m looking for something new I love to check out nerdy forum comments on Fragrantica for scents I already know and love, and how other people compare those to new finds.
I’ve worn Jo Malone’s Lime Basil Mandarin for years in the summer.
Guerlain Aqua Allegoria Mandarine Basilic
An oldie but a goodie: Annick Goutal’s Eau du Hadrien. It’s very light and citrusy. A heavier one is Creed’s Virgin Island Water. It’s veering over toward the masculine side of unisex. I think it smells like a summer drink, sort of citrus and lightly of gin.
11ish. We were just talking about looking for a replacement the next sale cycle.
random question: we’ve heard about probationary feds being fired, including many who were established in their career and had taken a promotion in the last year or two. Does anyone happen to know what purpose it serves to have a probationary period for promoted employees? I’m just curious about the general mechanics. Presumably when they already work there, you can figure out if they are suitable for the job and then promote them? Is this a thing at other employers?
PS: thanks for fixing the username getting saved, it works for me now!
The new probationary period is intended to provide assurance that an employee is, in fact, a good fit for the new position. If there were no probationary period, an employer might hesitate to promote a current employee who is on the bubble or one from another agency.
In the before times:
It’s relatively hard to fire or demote feds, so having a probationary period means that there’s a good assessment period to make sure that someone is a good fit for a position. Somewhat equivalent to pre-tenure professors.
If you have transitioned to more of a whole foods diet (by which I mean plants (including grains) + meat), what resources did you find helpful along the way?
She’s plant based, but Rainbow Plant Life has outstanding recipes and a great YouTube channel! There’s no better way to get more plants than to eat some vegan dishes, even if you’re not completely adopting that diet or lifestyle.
love her recipes,while not being vegan or vegetarian.
I haven’t heard of this resource, but love it. Thank you for posting! (Also, love that she’s ex-Big-Law)
The library had some good books with recipe ideas and I guess motivation/inspiration. There were a bunch all of which I took with a big grain of salt. The one I remember finding most helpful ironically was Pioppi Diet (ironic because its author has very much jumped the shark since then!). I was already pretty comfortable with cooking, but I still liked how Cooks Illustrated actually explained the rationale behind their recipes. I don’t know if it’s all AI slop now, but back then, Pinterest was good for recipe inspiration too.
David Chang’s “Cooking at Home” cookbook is really good at explaining cooking, especially improvising, if you are not a strong cook. It also does a good job of where you can cut corners on not letting perfect (all whole foods) be the enemy of good enough (more cooking than you used to do).
Most of the food I eat is made by me, from scratch with whole foods. There are some mildly processed things, like tinned chickpeas, Tamari soy sauce, Dijon mustard, peanut butter and tamarind paste, but almost every ingredient I use to cook is just that, one whole ingredient.
I keep and use a lot of spices, and have a very well-stocked pantry. I use a lot of aromatics like herbs, chili, garlic and ginger, and keep ginger, lime leaves and chili peppers in the freezer. This means I can make a lot of different things without shopping recipe by recipe.
My most used dry spices are black pepper, turmeric, cumin, coriander, chili flakes, kashmiri chili, garam masala blend, oregano, rosemary, mustard seeds and cardamom.
I think it’s helpful to premake and freeze some meals to make sure you have easy options. I also like to make a bigger batch of generic bolognese style sauce, divide and use one part for lasagna, one for spagetti, one for cottage pie, add chili and beans and oregano to make one into chili sauce etc. The premade dinners or lunches make sure that I get days off planning or fixing anything.
I think it’s helpful to have a couple of standby 15 minute meals that you can make with extremely low effort from pantry items. Two of mine: 1) pasta with onion, frozen peas, pantry protein (tinned salmon, feta in fridge, cured ham in fridge) and an egg/some cream/some parmesan 2) frittatta with whatever veg is there.
The best resource is knowing what kind of food you like to eat, and pratice making a simple and satisfying version of that made from scratch, whatever it is.