Coffee Break: Harlow Shoulder Bag

78 Comments

1. Thanks for those who chimed in on the wedding attire post this morning! I realized that the request for guests to not wear white, purple, blue, or green is on an FAQ tab, not on the landing page or the RSVP page. I think a ton of guests will miss the memo. I’m just the nosy weirdo who likes to poke through the pages detailing the bridal party and engagement photos!

   1. In this case pretend you didn’t see it

      1. 100%

      2. 100% pretend you didn’t see it.

         I commented late on the morning thread but I don’t even understand the justification for this from the bride’s perspective. I think visually it is *more* appealing, not less appealing, to have guests in colors that align with the wedding color palette, although of course you shouldn’t order your guests to wear only certain colors.

      3. Yup. You don’t get to own the colour blue!

         1. I’m one of those weirdos who pretty much only wears shades of blue, and this invitation would have thrown me for a loop!

      4. +3

   2. Didn’t chime in on the thread this morning. I had a friend make a similar request on colors years ago that was the colors of her non-traditional wedding dress and the bridesmaids dresses. I will say that it was fun seeing everyone way more colorful than usual.

      1. If this is something like an Indian wedding with the bride wearing red, I think that’s a *totally* different story than OP’s friend’s request.

      2. This request was to *not* wear white, blue, green, or purple, so it wouldn’t lead to guests being more colorful.

   3. ha, I too am that weirdo reading the whole website!

2. I just brought a full wrap twill skirt and feel that this is what I’ve been needing throughout perimenopause, the pandemic pounds, and beyond. It’s below the knee length, which is usually frumpy on me, but this one somehow isn’t. I just need some Famolares and I’m doing all the things my mom did back in the day (I will skip the home perm and just accept that I have babyfine hair that won’t do a d*mn thing).

   1. Don’t forget the Levi’s Bendovers pants!

3. This will completely out me if you know me but whatever. I really need help figuring out what resources may be available or who to ask questions to, or what even to search for online or ask.

   MIL was widowed when she was 58. She’s now 65. She lives in rural Birmingham. DH is her only child in the US. They are not close. She’s a very difficult woman, long history of mental and physical health issues that have been largely untreated or exploited going way back to DH’s childhood (please just trust my take on that for the purposes of this post). He has some pretty firm boundaries with her that he’s established over the years, and particularly since FIL died. We live outside Boston and have for almost 20 years. SIL defected abroad for school years ago and has no interest in returning. MIL chose to move to general Birmingham area after FIL died because she is from the broad area, despite not having lived there for 30+ years, but as the clock is oriented, she totally randomly chose to buy a house at 2 o’clock and her family/remaining friends live at 7 o’clock, 2-3 hrs from one another. She met a guy/another widow, and they’ve been together for ~3 years. They went as far as having some kind of commitment ceremony at Thanksgiving so they’re “married” in their minds, though not legally. They spend most time at his house but she’s retained ownership of her home.

   Most recently, she had a mental health crisis Easter weekend and was placed in a psych hold. She hasn’t fully recovered yet, doesn’t take her meds reliably. She was reliant on the boyfriend for care who evidently just told her today he’s too unwell himself (same terrible habits, health history, from what we understand) to care for her. She just called DH saying she needs help, BF said she makes him worse and won’t care for her, can’t feed herself, can’t drive, etc. I don’t know if they broke up or what, but it’s sounding like is the case.

   We don’t even know where to start. DH is calling MIL’s brother who is 3 hrs away to do an immediate wellness check in. I’m trying to figure out if her health insurance, real estate taxes and utility bills are paid (I used to pay 100% of her bills directly after FIL died so it’s distant but familiar territory to me). Thankfully she owns the home free and clear, as far a we know, and she has modest but well-managed life insurance proceeds that she lives off of. DH is deeply not wanting to just hop on a plane – again, a long, complex history in their relationship, but he’s also not no-contact or anything… but he also doesn’t want to see his mom totally languish. Or, maybe someone here will tell me that he can’t have it both ways – he either lets her languish or he gets more involved. I don’t know. He’s not a bad person – he’s been through so, so much with her over the years.

   She’s not fully in the most rural corner of Alabama but she’s fairly rural (no uber eats, grocery delivery or anything). So, what am I looking for? If we wanted to start exploring some kind of service to check in on her, what are we talking about or looking for? We’re fully at a loss at the moment but need to start taking some steps. I’m also encouraging DH to get back with his therapist, who he relied on heavily after FIL died, so I have that side covered. Thanks in advance for kindness….

   1. I will sing the praises of an elder care social worker all day long – we got one (private pay) for a relative with dementia (“Susie”) who lives in another state from us and she has been a GODSEND. She can not only drive Susie to appointments and for errands, but she can directly communicate with doctors and other members of the care team (with our permission), which has been so, so helpful. She keeps an eye on health and safety and takes initiative to address hazards, like boxes left out in the walkway or bottles of bleach that are against the assisted living community regulations.

      This may vary by state, but at least in her state, a social worker was key – we previously had a “companion” who did not have the same level of skill and responsibility. I would try to start there. Hugs to you.

      Also, I’m not sure if this will be possible with the dynamics you described, but if it is possible, get a Power of Attorney form in place STAT.

      1. So, in one of MIL’s fits over the last several years she changed her health care proxy from DH to some random as s friend she’s not even friends with anymore as a way to like stick it to him… So, a proxy exists but if we call this person (she has not seen in 4 years or more) and say she’s to make decisions, she’d be like… no? Presumably MIL is not of sound mind enough to change that now given the recent psych hold. I don’t know about any POA, but we will try to figure this out. We probably need a local attorney, I’m realizing as I talk this out loud..

         1. If your MIL is still in the hospital (or even if she’s not), you can call her doctor and express your concerns. They won’t be able to “comment” or tell you anything, but they can listen. Be specific and emphasize any imminent safety threats.

   2. Ugh, I’m so sorry you are dealing with this. Since it seems like you don’t know where to start, you might look at the AARP’s caregiving resources on their website – all free and pretty comprehensive. Their materials can be helpful in brainstorming lists of what kinds of things need to be done and figuring out who can do them.

      I do think it is going to be very hard for your husband to not get more involved and avoid having her languish unless one of her other relatives decides to step up. But he may be able to be more of a quarterback than the person dealing with her personally.

      Is she open to selling the house and moving to the same town as at least one of her other relatives? If she sold her house could she afford to rent at an assisted living place, either in her current town or ideally in the same town as a relative? My FIL lived in a small town in Mississippi and could afford the local assisted living on his very limited income. It was frankly kind of a dump, but they made sure he was fed and took his medications. Having local people who could check in on him was very, very helpful.

   3. Sounds very difficult and I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I’d advise you to call 211; they can connect you with local resources. If that’s a dead end for you, you can contact the local Area Agency on Aging (referred to as AAA). Both should be able to connect you with a social worker. Good luck.

   4. A Place For Mom is a service with free resources, I’d give them a call and see if they have advice for you. They helped me a lot when my dad had a health crisis a few years ago.

      1. They’re paid for by certain assisted living chains – did you feel like they tried to steer you to their properties?

         1. I’ve never understood this criticism of A Place For Mom. That’s like complaining that a car dealership explaining the features of its available SUVs has a vested interest in you buying one. It’s true, but since you are buying one anyways, does it matter?

         2. They gave me the names of three different local companies (I was looking for in-home nursing/companion care), then I called and vetted each one and dealt with the companies directly from there. I did get my name put on some elder care lists and now companies like Brookdale call me a lot, but I don’t totally fault A Place for Mom for that.

   5. I am from Birmingham, and I’m super confused by the geography you’re describing. Birmingham is urban/suburban and isn’t that big. Nowhere is more than 20-30 min from anything else. I’m assuming BIL is in Hoover. However, if MIL is 2-3 hours from him, then she’s no longer in what would be considered Metro Birmingham– sounds more like Gadsden? This is relevant because the type of services available will depend on the county/metro area that she lives in. My guess too is that lot of social workers/attorneys in Birmingham will not travel to the area she lives. You need to be looking for services in that particular area.

      DHR is the branch of AL state government that handles Adult Protective Services.

      A POA will allow you to do what you need to do in AL– assuming MIL is still competent to sign one– which seems borderline. If she isn’t competent to sign, someone will need to be her conservator, and courts generally prefer someone to be appointed in the state. A probate/elder law attorney in AL would be able to handle either of these for you.

      I would start with an elder law attorney– that person should also be able to refer you to a social worker that could handle a lot of the daily care.

      1. She’s in the Oneonta area and she’s from the Eutaw area, but further beyond those places, so it’s like 2:25 drive time? I know she goes to Cullman sometimes for doctors. So, I’m definitely using “Birmingham” in a generous sense since it’s the largest city/where we’d fly in and out of if we visited, but they are hardly in greater Birmingham.

         But… thank you. Like, very much so, for this response (and others). I will read all of this tonight, with DH, and I think we can start to take some tangible steps.

         1. Got it– so I would just Google elder law attorneys in Blount County/Cullman/Gadsden, and call someone you feel comfortable with. Normally, you will be asked to pay someone a consultation fee. Do that and just get their advice on how to proceed.

            It sounds like you primarily going to need to get her qualified for Medicaid and admitted into a nursing home. You should be able to a get a third party to do most of this work for you. (I used to do a lot of work with nursing homes, and it is pretty normal for estranged family to just do the bare minimum necessary to get the person in the nursing home and move on.)

            I don’t think a social worker that checks in periodically is going to be able to help you as much as you need in this geography.

            1. Asking what feels like a terrible question but I have to ask. Who bares the cost of all of this? Can this get charged back to MIL? Is that standard? We don’t have endless resources to throw at this. We have our own Life Stuff at the moment, which is also why this news is extra paralyzing at the moment. We’re not destitute by any means and hopefully that changes soon but right now we are hunkered down.

            2. Yes— this is why you need to talk to an elder law attorney. Generally, a POA/conservator will get MIL in a nursing home and then will start selling/spending down her assets to pay for the care. Once the assets are spent down, they will apply for Medicaid, which will cover the rest of the care at a nursing home. (This is assuming MIL needs nursing home level care. Medicaid will not cover assisted living. Medicaid is paid for by the U.S. taxpayer…. for the timebeing.) An attorney/conservator would also pay themselves out of MIL’s assets.

               My guess is that you would be out of pocket some money at the beginning of this whole ordeal to get a POA/conservator in place. You may get the money back once MIL’s assets are accessed. An elder law attorney would be able to give you a good idea of how much you would be out of pocket (if anything). I used to do this kind of work in another state, and frequently, if you are able to get this moving at the front end, there isn’t a ton of expense for the family. Expenses tended to arise if family drug their feet or were spending the person’s assets inappropriately.

   6. Is she still hospitalized? If so, and she is not able to take care of herself, I would think the inpatient social worker is important to speak with about options.

      I would push to have her move in with brother for now.

      Does husband still visit her? If so, then yes this would be a time for a visit to help coordinate her care locally. But if he is estranged and doesn’t, then he should keep his distance and help from afar.

      Great idea to have brother come to check her. I agree with calling the Department of Aging that covers her area and ask a social worker to visit to help define what resources she will have available to her. Ask if you can be included in speaker phone during the visit. If she is not indigent, she will likely have to pay for things like a caregiver visit (cooking/cleaning etc..) out of pocket, but she may be eligible for things like Meals on Wheels. Unfortunately, Trump just cut funding for Meals on Wheels, but they are awesome and might be able to help.

      I would also call the information line at the local NAMI for Birmingham

      https://namibham.org/contact/

      Ask if they have a person who can help give you ideas for resources that she might be eligible for. For example, in my community, seniors with mental illness get monthly home visits of a counselor. There are also subsidized senior living apartments that may be options for her that have some social services on site, that could be a transition until things get sorted.

      Good luck.

   7. I mean, she sure sounds like a candidate for a wash-your-hands-of-this-woman retirement home.
      It’d be good for you and him to figure out exactly what care you’re willing to offer and what the boundary conditions would be. You do not actually have to help this woman if she’s that difficult, and you do not have to help her in all circumstances (More practically, she can’t ask for help and also remove his POA in a fit of pique).

      This could look like say he gets POA again and access to her accounts+ she accepts hired help + that he’s not moving back/dropping everything + she takes her meds regularly, and she gets one visit from him where he sets her up with an aide + other services.

      1. If she’s not competent at the moment, she can’t change the power of attorney. You would need to get a conservatorship guardianship to make that change now.

      2. This comment is worth bumping up. You don’t have to help her if it’s beyond your capacity or finances. If it were me, I’d help with a few basics (like getting her on the radar for a social worker or even assisting her into a retirement home), but probably no more.

      3. “You don’t have to help her” is so easy to say and so hard to live with when the person you’re electing not to help is your mentally ill mother. I was in this situation. I also had a very difficult and damaging relationship with my mother all my life, my mother was often irrational and impossible, and I had limited financial resources. I got Adult Protective Services involved when she developed symptoms of dementia on top of undertreated mental illness. In the end, I had to go to court for guardianship, and this was only legally possible after she “bottomed out” in multiple ways. The threshold is high.

4. My mom is turning 70 next year and wants to take the family (my dad, me, my sis/bro-in-law/their 8 and 5-year-olds) on a trip. However, she is not the best at planning travel. She will be way too selective but at the same time way too open (like she won’t narrow it down to a location or time of year… which makes planning impossible).

   She wants to pay for everyone, which is so nice, so I told her then she should just decide on everything. But she also wants everyone to like the destination, so she wants us to weigh in. She also wants it to be all inclusive. I don’t love the idea of all inclusives (and have never stayed at one), but I am willing to be open minded if anyone here has any ideas of good ones…

   Any ideas on where I could suggest?

   1. Sounds like an opportunity for a cruise. I don’t like cruises myself, but they are great for families of varying ages/interests, and the itinerary is decided for you so little planning is required.

      1. +1 million. This sounds like a cruise. No particular preferred location, all ages, prefer all inclusive.

         For the indecisive, I tend to suggest offering three options and asking for her to pick the best (so she has made choices, but isn’t overwhelmed by the huge number of options)

      2. I hate cruises, much prefer all inclusives. If they can stay at one with a golf course, spa, and water park that covers the kids and adults interest wise. The food is generally much better at all inclusive a than on a cruise plus the pools are so much nicer and don’t smell like ocean stank.

         1. The point about pools is true but I strongly disagree about food, especially if you’re comparing at a similar price level.

   2. Beaches Turks and Caicos and Grand Velas are the conventional recs for family-friendly all-inclusive resorts that are actually nice and not cheap-feeling. They’re both insanely expensive though. I think some people put Hyatt Ziva in that group as well but I went to one and wasn’t impressed. It is a significantly lower price point though.

      In general, all-inclusive resorts in Mexico and the Caribbean that allow children tend to be really expensive relative to ones that don’t. I have a long list of affordable(ish) ones with pretty good food and a fairly luxe vibe, but they’re all adults only.

      A Disney cruise would also be awesome if you’re open to a cruise. I think cruises are actually better than all-inclusive resorts for multi-gen groups because it’s so easy to do your own thing and come together for dinner and the activities you enjoy as a group. I’m very much not a Disney person, but I was surprised how much I enjoyed our Disney cruise, and your sister’s kids are at wonderful ages for it. Celebrity is another nice cruise line that welcomes kids and has programming for them but isn’t as kid-centric as Disney and is quite a bit cheaper than Disney. A cruise also gives you more destination options: Alaska, Asia, Australia, etc.

      1. +1 for a Disney cruise. I am not a cruise person but loved our multi-generational Disney cruise (20 people aged 2 through 85).

   3. All inclusives are a god-send for these types of trips. It’s a fixed price, everyone can eat when they want, what they want, as much as they want, and there are usually solid options.

      1. If you search on reddit, someone put together a resource (Excel Spreadsheet) of every all-inclusive in the Caribbean, filterable by price, location, amenities (e.g., Kids Club) etc.

   4. Is she using “all inclusive” to mean “beach resort”? Or would another type of vacation where lodging/meals/entertainment are all packaged together also work? That would open it up to a dude ranch, cruise — or maybe even a tour package.

   5. A cruise? Once you choose ship and destination, which will dictate the time of year you go, the booking is kind of one-and-done. The cruise will keep everyone entertained and out/in each other’s hair as preferred. Cruise fare covers almost everything except alcohol, specialty dining and gratuities, and if she really wants to “pay for everything” she can pay the gratuities when she books the cruise, buy unlimited drink packages for everyone, and book/pay for specialty dining. (casino gambling, spa charges, and onboard shopping are also not included, but that seems obvious).

      I recommend she work with an experienced cruise travel agent who will suss out what the group might enjoy, make an expert recommendation on ship and itinerary, and then book and manage the whole thing.

      1. And now is the time to book cruises for next year – prices will be best and inventory will be good.

         1. Yeah, you want to book cruises as early as possible. I’m not sure about other cruise lines but Disney has itineraries out through September 2026 and prices generally only go up the closer you get to the cruise date.

   6. I am not a huge fan of all-inclusive resorts or cruises, but they are perfect for multi-generational vacations, particularly with younger children. A few questions: (1) Where do people live? Specifically, where do the people with kids live? My recommendation for people on the west coast would be different than people on the east coast. (2) How does your group feel about the beach? and (3) Are you thinking of this summer? Thanksgiving week? Winter break? With the kids, it probably needs to be while school is out. Time of year will also be important to location.

      I would let sister make a first run at dates because of the kids’ school schedules. Then you pick a week that also works for you and propose that to your parents.

      But regardless of time of year, let us know where people are coming from. I am one of three adult children (plus three stepsiblings), plus grandchildren ranging in age from a two-year-old with special needs to a 25-year-old so I have taken a number of these trips with various combinations of family members.

   7. Disneyworld? The kids would be at the right age. It is not quite all inclusive, but certainly a bubble. With all the hotels, there are lots of price point options.

      1. A Disney cruise would be a lot easier and more fun for the adults and just as much fun for the kids.

   8. Hire a travel agent. Let that person recommend places. Do not take this on.

   9. Just wanted to add that there are all-inclusive resorts in Europe, especially in beach areas, so you’re not limited to the Caribbean. We went to a great all-inclusive in Turkey last year.

   10. I’m a big fan of Hawaii for family vacations, and would particularly recommend Ka’anapali Beach for this, because there are hotels and condo complexes all along the beach there. We loved the Hyatt Regency (what a pool!) but renting some condos in the same complex would be a great idea, particularly for families with young children who need to worry about nap times etc.

       1. Yep, also would recommend Napili Kai Beach resort. It’s throwbacky. And on Costco vacations which is fantastic.

   11. Would she be willing to work with a travel agent? I believe there are some that specialize in planning family trips and could be in charge of gathering feedback from various parties and then channeling that into actual plans.

5. My boyfriend was given notice that his position will be terminated September 1. He is really depressed. He’s recruiting like crazy and working 12 hours a day on finding another job, but he just seems so worn down and sad. We are getting married this month, but he is on H1B currently which adds another layer of stress for. He just found out a job an old boss was recruiting him aggressively for doesn’t sponsor visas, so it was really another blow, as the role seemed like a perfect fit and they clearly really wanted him on the team.

   How do I support him? I feel so sad to see him so sad.

   1. Won’t his status change after you get married? I thought that was the common trope for immigrants marrying citizens.

      1. Yes, but it can unfortunately take 5-6 months+ to get the paperwork processed

      2. I certainly don’t think it’s immediate. Not OP here.

      3. Right, it’s neither immediate nor automatic. My ex-H married a European woman and it took a long time – months at least, maybe a year, I don’t remember – for her get her green card. I was one of the people who signed affidavits attesthing that the marriage was legit. Which wasn’t weird at all …

         OP, see an immigration lawyer ASAP. It might be good to have a courthouse/ city hall marriage immediately so you are legally married while all this is going on, before the bigger wedding. The lawyer can advise you on whether that would be helpful.

         Sending you and your fiance all good wishes!

      4. Getting married will make him eligible, but he’ll be waiting for a green card for 6-18 months or so, during which time he typically won’t be able to work in the us or realistically travel internationally (I looked it up- he’d probably be applying under I-485, which has a 9.6month wait rn).
         You can apply for permission to work while waiting, but that can take as long as the green card itself.

         It’s going to suck for a bit (lots of sympathy- we went through this ~20 years ago and it was bad enough then.)

   2. Consult an immigration attorney and get the ball rolling to get his status solidified on the basis of your marriage. Luckily you’re getting married well before September 1, but having professional advice on the paperwork should be helpful.

      1. +1 – start working on this yesterday. The landscape has changed.

6. I know it’s late today – I’ll ask this tomorrow maybe.

   We adopted a dog two weeks ago. When I picked him up, the foster mentioned that he had had some blood in his stool, but he had seen the vet and the vet had prescribed chicken-less food and it was mostly all better. “Just don’t feed him food with chicken.” Okay.

   Um yeah no. His stool has been bloody the whole time with us, but on Sunday, the dog began pooping blood jelly. His diarrhea’s so bad I’ve had to keep him on a line outside because he can’t hold it in the house. I asked for the medical records, which hadn’t been provided at the time of adoption, and it turns out that this has been going on for at least 3 months with tons of tests run and medications given – this wasn’t solved at ALL. We went to the urgent care and after $375 we’ve got more tests (results tomorrow) and special food. (Snarky aside: The doc is positive that this has nothing to do with chicken.) If these new tests are negative, we’re looking at something like IBS or cancer.

   So I’m right to be upset that they gave me a sick dog, right? That they shouldn’t have been actively advertising an ill dog? (He kept popping up in my feed every 3 weeks or so, so they were definitely advertising him.) I just…AGH.

   1. I’m really sorry this is happening to both of you. Whatever is going on is surely exacerbated by the stress of going to a new home. They definitely should not have adopted him out to you or been marketing him for adoption until he was well. This sounds like a $hitty rescue. As someone with an old dog with lots of poo problems, I would return him so they can get him situated properly even though it breaks my heart for him to have to change places again and be stressed out again.

      1. Yeah this js really unfair to the dog! The rescue should never have stressed him out like that while he’s not healthy

   2. It sounds like it was not a good sign when the rescue didn’t provide medical records at the time of the adoption. There are a lot of wonderful people in rescue, and there are also people who seem to feel that the ends can justify the means. They should have been upfront that the dog was ill and in the middle of a diagnostic process, and not just experiencing an ordinary food intolerance; that sounds like wishful thinking that doesn’t reflect what was in the medical records. I agree that rehoming an animal that isn’t medically stable isn’t necessarily in the animal’s best interests. But if they felt he’d do better in a different home environment, they could have done a foster to adopt arrangement. The way they handled this makes it seem like they were trying to get someone else to pay for the veterinary care and get him off their hands, which is the kind of thing a rescue would criticize pretty harshly in a breeder.

      1. Maybe this is harsh and there was some level of miscommunication happening (as can easily happen with volunteers).

   3. I’m so sorry. If IBS in dogs is similar to IBS in cats, a hypoallergenic food CAN be helpful in treatment; our cat is currently eating elk, bison, etc. I was told it has to be a prescription food though, as regular food can be contaminated with allergens – typically it is a novel protein diet. Chicken is a common allergen as it is so cheap and ubiquitous in pet food. IBS in cats also exists on a spectrum of food allergy-like to cancer. All this to say, I think it is possible the foster was a bit misinformed, although willful deception also seems very possible.

      1. It sounds like you’re describing IBD (IBS and IBD get mixed up a lot, and I wonder if OP meant IBD too).

         1. Yeah, IBD and lymphoma have very similar symptoms and it’s hard to get a dx of one versus the other.

      2. I have had two dogs with similar issues, the current dog with similar (though not 3 month long) bouts of jelly-bloody stool.
         The first dog we never figured out triggers, but limited ingredient diet with novel protein (ours was not prescription, just from the pet store) and flagyl/metronidazole pills as needed were very effective to stop the diarrhea.
         Current dog seems to have stress as a trigger – it sounds silly but we have traced it back to an apparent phobia of balloons and balloons popping. It resolves itself with time.
         All this to say, it may not be as worst-case as you are expecting. Hopefully you have more clarity soon.

   4. Can you reach out to the rescue rather than just the previous foster for more information? I agree that it sounds like they gave you a sick dog, but foster families are usually just caught in the middle. I do a ton of fostering and I generally don’t know much about the dogs I foster, although stomach issues are pretty common when a dog is settling in somewhere (although not like what you describe). Most rescues will take dogs back, especially with something like this (if that’s what you want). Otherwise, most of the rescues I’m involved with will help crowdsource or fund medical care for adopted dogs with medical issues, so definitely worth reaching out and seeing what your options are.

      1. I also have fostered a bunch and agree with all of this. Some rescues are very professionalized and others are disorganized, but foster parents are rarely fully in the know. I’d try to hunt down the rescue org and get your dog’s full record. I hope you get some helpful lab results. That bill, by the way, is nothing in terms of emergency vet bills. Not trying to scare you, but I don’t think I’ve had a 3-figure emergency vet bill in recent memory. They’re all $1K+.

7. Heading to Aix and Nice in August.

   Would love any recommendations for restaurants or hidden gems – thank you!
   Will be in each location just 3 nights (after a week in southern Spain…)

   1. https://corporette.com/jcrew-classic-belt/#comment-4657343

      I was the first reply in this chain earlier this spring. TLDR – Nice itself was just ok, but the surrounding towns were delightful and easily accessible by inexpensive, reliable train.

      1. I was the OP of that thread and got us a guided tour (viator) w/ a van to Eze, Monaco, and the Fragonard factory. It was great since my DH’s mobility was limited, so the dropoff right at the medieval city wall in Eze was perfect for him. (He hated the perfume factory though!) In Monaco we went to the aquarium for our DD (we had been to Monaco before and wanted to show her the cool building) and did some fancy-car-watching. Good bakery in Nice is Aux Délices de la Buffa.

   2. We were just in Aix in October 2024 for 3 nights and really liked it. In terms of hidden gems…the restaurant Yves was great, was recommended to us by a local tour guide, it’s a tiny restaurant run by one man, who is both chef and waiter. We enjoyed quite a few of the restaurants on Cours Mirabeau (the main drag) including Le Singe Vert, but would also recommend getting off that plaza and trying some of the other areas including Place Richelme (l’Unic Bar’s little terrace is great for people-watching). I was pleasantly surprised by good shopping in Aix, too. The only thing we missed out on was Cezanne’s studio, because it was closed the entire time, but appears to now be reopened. We did two different small group day-long tours out of Aix as well, via this company, if that’s your jam: https://www.alafrancaise.fr/en/provence/

8. Just sharing an update- I bought the Shark proflex dryer. It took some getting used to, but 2 weeks in, I definitely like it. Thanks for the recommendations! I mostly use the straight attachment. It’s quick but my hair feels healthy. I love how lightweight it is.

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