Stylish, Comfortable Shoes That Are Made to Last

Salvatore Ferragamo Carla Pump | CorporetteFor some women it makes more sense to splurge on “investment” shoes for work that (hopefully) you can wear for years, rather than choose cheaper ones that you’ll keep having to replace. Reader M wonders:

I am struggling with my shoe game! I would like to invest in shoes that are stylish, comfortable, and long lasting. I notice that guys purchase one expensive pair of work shoes but they last their entire careers. I work in the finance area in a young company. Have you seen any gems lately you would like to share?

I’m curious to hear what readers think here, because I have mixed opinions about this. First, the “classic” black pump does change — right now toes are pointy; in recent years they were almond-shaped instead. Second, beware of pregnancy, aging, and feet — many women find that their shoe size will change throughout their lives. Personally I gained about a half size with each pregnancy, which — after having to donate the vast majority of my shoe collection — makes me happy I never committed and spent the money on that pair of Manolos or Choos. Even just with aging, your arches may fall and your feet may widen. So: I kind of don’t believe in “lifetime” shoes for women.

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Feeling Jealous of a Younger Colleague

Feeling Jealous of a Younger ColleagueWhat should you do if you’re feeling envious of a colleague who’s younger than you, seemingly unappreciative of the opportunity you’re giving her, and also — in your opinion — inappropriately flirty at networking events? Reader J wonders:

I’m a 40 yr old business development manager at an engineering firm. I’ve formed a group of female colleagues that helps with networking and business that’s getting notice in my city (like a Stiletto Mafia). A few months ago one of the key ladies in my group invited my junior engineer in my firm to join.

This engineer is funny and smart but also a gorgeous 24 yr old. Now I am torn between wanting to be a mentor and jealousy. I am jealous that she has access to this group of high powered ladies that are my friends and doesn’t seem to grateful that I’m including her. This engineer also occasionally helps with networking. It’s frustrating to attend a business event while these men are flirting with her. She isn’t overt, but she is aware of her looks and plays them up.

I’d like to drop her from the group and ask her to focus on current clients vs networking. Am I being a hypocrite?

I think you’re being honest, Reader J — a lot more than most people would be in person. I don’t think this is unusual, though; I think a lot of younger women alienate good mentors by being too entitled (like the reader who expected her boss to help her network) or arrogant at work, or, here, too focused on other parts of life like flirting. (We have offered some tips in the past on how to network with older women that may help younger readers here!)

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Tales from the Wallet: Retirement

retirement-womenLadies, how much are you saving for retirement? How large does retirement loom in your thoughts — and where does it fall in your priorities?  Welcome to our next installment of our Money Milestone series, where we’ve discussed paying for grad school, wedding finances, home buyingfinancially planning for a baby, and financial strategies for divorce.

I haven’t retired yet, obviously, but it does loom fairly large in my thoughts and priorities just because getting enough saved by the time we want to retire — and hopefully meet a personal goal of paying for college for both boys — is not going to be a simple matter.  Constant vigilance is the key, I think!  Of course, you don’t want to save so much that you can’t enjoy your life right now — after all, not to get too dark on this sunny day, but not everyone will have to worry about retirement.  We max out my husband’s 401K and my SEP-IRA every year, and we save what else we can in tax-savvy investments and with automatic investing.  (I just started using a new app called Acorns, which is interesting: you can link it to bank and credit card accounts, and it will round up every transaction and invest the difference in Vanguard funds.  Spent $8.95 at the drugstore? It’ll take that $.05 and put it in a queue to invest when you get to $5.  It’s a bit wonky right now — it mysteriously hasn’t updated in 10 days — but I think it shows a lot of promise.)

Readers, are you throwing everything you can at retirement — or are you prioritizing other goals first (like keeping investments fairly liquid for a home purchase or other big expense like a wedding, or paying down debt)?  (Incidentally, we did try to answer what retirement assets you can use for a first home purchase in a previous post.) 

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The Next Step: Upgrading Weekend Clothes

How to Upgrade Your Weekend Clothes | CorporetteWelcome to what is probably our final “next step” feature, where we explore how to take the next step up in work clothesoffice heels, stylish work bags, and professional jewelry; we also explored the middle upgrades for services (e.g., you can cook for yourself or get a professional chef — but what’s in between?). Today: how to step up your weekend clothes game. (Pictured: Vince Gathered Shirtdress, on sale from $385 to $230 at Nordstrom.)

Here is my theory on weekend clothes: there are very few classics. At the rate that fashion moves these days, the quickest way to look and feel frumpy is to have an outdated off-duty style. I speak from experience here: I refused to buy in to the skinny jean trend for <cough> way too long, arguing that bootcuts were classics and fit right in to the style for weekend me. So what if I’m still in bootcuts when everyone else in skinny jeans, you may say — it’s just denim, and I’m in suits or sheath dresses five days a week. But I’ve noticed that a lot of elements of your workwear wardrobe can flow from weekend choices.

For example: a fitted t-shirt looks great with bootcuts, but you need a drapey, tunic-y, asymmetrical top for skinny jeans. The slouchy, more boxy tees and sweaters (or, gah, the crop tops) look better with boyfriend jeans. Once you get used to doing the half-tuck with your jeans on the weekend, your office style changes as well — to more drapey blouses with slimmer-cut pants. Similarly, once you get used to rolling your jeans to wear with your booties, wearing knee-high boots with skinny jeans feels almost antiquated — which means you buy fewer knee-high boots or don’t replace the ones you have, and then it’s less of an issue whether it’s appropriate to wear knee-high boots to work with dresses, and instead we start talking about whether booties with skirts are work-appropriate. It’s very interesting to me how all of the pieces interact.

This is all just a theory, and I’m curious to hear what you guys think about it. I’m still perfecting my own weekend game, but I think this is where the capsule collection really comes in — you buy a few of-the-moment pieces that all work together in terms of color, silhouette, and vibe, and try to keep your new purchases to a minimum. I also think that if dresses work for you in your off-duty life, they’re one of the best ways to stay as close to “classic” as you can get.

Anyway, here are my tiers for weekend wear — readers, where do you shop for weekend clothes? Do you also feel like casual fashion is moving far more quickly than it has in the past — and how do you address it? Or, is all of this less of an issue because you’re either in a suit, workout clothes/sweatpants, or a date night slinky dress, with very little in between time?  

Tier 1 — These stores are easily accessible, and you probably shopped at them in your teens. The pros: they’re affordable and always on trend. The cons: a lot of their cuts and trends may skew a bit younger than you prefer; the clothes are not made to last (generally speaking); and you may want to consider the ethics of buying a ton of “disposable” clothes.

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Career Hiccups

career-hiccupsI’ve gotten a few requests lately to address “career hiccups” — how to deal with failing the bar, being awkward with coworkers, making a huge mistake — and I think this is a great question. So: let’s discuss.

For my $.02, I think that YOU are the biggest hurdle to get over after a career hiccup. You can say the right thing in the moment and after the fact, and coworkers either accept you or they don’t — but until you forgive yourself you’ll never be at the top of your game again. I remember a time in my career when I started a list of all the screw-ups I’d made, slight or otherwise. As in, an Excel spreadsheet (because that’s how I roll). And you can sit there and say, objectively, “Kat, that is crazy,” but in the moment it made perfect sense to me. Let’s remember everything I ever did wrong, in a sort-able chart! (Let’s just say this idea didn’t work out for the best.)

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Black Suits and Summer Job Interviews

interview suit - hot weatherCan you still interview in a black suit in the summertime? When you have to attend a job interview in hot weather, is there a better, lighter alternative to the standard black or blue suit? Reader D wonders…

I had a sudden job interview this week and had to wear a suit. Although they had air conditioning, it was very hot. My suit was black and it seemed too heavy. Aren’t there better alternatives to the black/blue suit when it’s over 80 degrees? Thanks!

Interesting question. We’ve talked about whether seasonless suiting is truly seasonless, as well as discussed lightweight blazers, dressing professionally for summer, and maintaining a professional look when it’s blisteringly hot — but we haven’t talked about this exact question.

I’m curious to hear what the readers say — my gut reaction here, possibly tempered by spending pretty much every summer since reaching adulthood in New York City is this: Not wear black? What’re you talkin’ about? So: with everything else, know your region (much like with colorful suits). Still, some notes:

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