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Coffee Break: Sheer Illusion Dots

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translucent fleece tights with dots

Readers were singing the praises of these translucent fleece tights from Noosh — and now I'm drooling over them.

I have always really liked the idea of translucent fleece tights — opacity in tights never really mattered to me, and I tend to think the sheerer looks are more flattering in general. Translucent fleece tights seemed like a great solution for multiple problems: you can look flattering and fancyish (so fancy that you're wearing hose instead of tights, right?) and yet still be uber warm.

The problem, as a lot of the readers mentioned, was the unfortunate fit of a lot of translucent fleece tights. The phrase “diaper butt” came up, and now I can't unsee it.

Readers praised these tights for their flattering fit, warmth, and quality — and now I'm drooling! I particularly like these swiss dot tights — they feel a bit more festive than regular tights, and perfect for the holidays.

The tights are $36, available in sizes XS-2X, and available in three colorways: sheer illusion dots (pictured), regular sheers, and opaque fleece tights. They also have translucent fleece tights in maternity sizes. For Cyber Monday they're offering 30% off, bringing the pictured tights down to $29.

Sales of note for 12/1 (we're in the midst of doing our Cyber Monday roundup, but we updated these first! You can see our Black Friday roundup here!)

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60 Comments

  1. Following up on the scar discussion from earlier, have you all used any of the silicone strips / products long after the effect with good results?
    One kid has a scar from jaw surgery on her cheek that is raised and if something painless with minimal fuss might flatten it out, she’d like that.
    Also: in my experience, no medical people have ever mention post-procedure scar minimization to me, ever. It’s all commercials and places like here (and it’s not like they offer up in-office procedures, so it’s not likely due to it being a competitor of sorts). Why? It would have been helpful to have plans for things that have left scars that maybe could have been avoided or minimized.

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    1. Totally agree—they never talk about scar care like they should. Yes, do the silicone tape. I have a scar that started to keloid from colon cancer surgery and even a year or two out, it makes a difference (not as dramatic as a new scar, but still useful). The best results by far are an injection from a derm with a steroid. I can tell the area that they didn’t hit at the top of my scar. Derm even said the best treatment is an injection.

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    2. Also meant to add that the injections I had weren’t right away (my mind was more focused on cancer than scarring). Was probably 6 months out—I might be remembering wrong. It could have even been longer. So it still might be worth talking to a derm about an injection, especially since it’s on her face.

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    3. I think it’s highly specialized, so unless you saw the relevant team, the medical people you saw probably aren’t familiar.

      Generally I feel like post-op care drops the ball a lot lately, and when I’ve tried to fact check that impression, I’ve read that it has to do with incentive structures and metrics and cost cutting, though I wouldn’t know if that is true.

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      1. It is highly specialized and highly individualized so it would be hard for a surgeon to manage – they usually care about what’s in the body, not the layers of skin on top. A nurse said to me that my scar was more likely to pucker due to my Mediterranean heritage, for example. I don’t know if that’s true. I used the Mederma brand scar minimizing strips but my scar is long and the best results were where I started the strip – like where I pressed it down the most consistently against the scar. My scar is on my shoulder and pretty dramatic so I gave up caring about it sorry

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    4. I recently used biocorneum on a flat white scar (I’m dark skinned) and it improved significantly. I have a lot of little scars and if it wasn’t so expensive I would use it on all.

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    5. Yes, I put silicone strips on a keloid c-section scar years after the surgery and the results were dramatic. Totally flattened out the scar and removed the redness.

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      1. If you want to learn how to do it for c sections, ask your ob/gyn for a referral to pelvic floor pt. It falls under their umbrella. But I feel like it should be something that your provider should point out to you.

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          1. Oh no, c section scar massage should be one of the basic pt checklist items for c sections. I don’t know why postpartum care is so terrible.

          2. She did go over scar massage, just not products marketed for cosmetic scar improvement.

        2. Right? Or at least explain who owns what parts of the recovery. I didn’t even know what was on the menu.

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      2. I had my derm do a series of steroid injections on my keloid c section scar. It’s not at all raised any more, and it’s barely visible. Steroid is relatively cheap too.

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  2. Maybe a fun question: what Black Friday ads have you been most stalked by this weekend? For me it’s Jones Road Beauty

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    1. I left my phone at my desk and came back to 32 text messages. I was so sure someone must have been in the hospital or Drama Sibling was raging, but it was just all sales.

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    2. I looked up one nice men’s quarter zip sweater from a brand that popped up on Instagram and now ALL the ads I’m getting are men’s quarter zips lol. Unfortunately my boyfriend doesn’t even like quarter zips, otherwise he would be set for life.

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  3. Did anyone see today’s NYT article about e-bike injuries in Marin County and how much more common and severe they are than traditional bike injuries? I had posted a reply on the mom’s page earlier mentioning that teens on an illegal motorbike (masquerading as an “ebike”) deliberately swerved towards my baby in a stroller to scare us over Thanksgiving weekend and I called the non-emergency police line only to be told that I was like the fifth caller about it just that day. I’m very, very glad various counties and school districts in CA (where I live) are increasing enforcement against these motorcycles, especially in the hands of teens. We have seen SO many near-misses and it would have been unforgivable if these jerks had harmed my baby.

    I know there’s going to be an uptick in e-bike purchases with the holidays coming up and I can only hope the enforcement will keep up. If you’re in a position to buy your kid an illegal motorbike, please don’t. In addition to them being awful for everyone around your kid, the article has this scary stat: “The most alarming difference was the fatality rate. “On a pedal bike, the chance of dying from an injury is about three-tenths of 1 percent,” Alfrey says. On an e-bike, the data indicated, it was 11 percent.”

    11 percent is higher than the risk of death if you were to climb Mount Everest. The teens I saw were probably at even higher risk – only two of three had helmets, they were three boys on two bikes, they had their phones out, and they were taking deliberate risks to scare others. Frightening.

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    1. Totally agree. Our city has a lot of teens using them with no lights on in the dark to go to school, dodging in between walkers and cars. IDK any safety precautions that they follow. I can barely see them and I’m convinced that the teen drivers won’t see them because they are just new to driving. I’m surprised I haven’t seen an accident but I have seen plenty of near-misses since it stopped being light out before school.

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      1. As a driver and as the parent of a teen driver, I am terrified of e-bikes. All bikes on the roads really, but e-bikes are worse.

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    2. Thank you for sharing!!! I have been curious about the dangers of e-bikes, as they seem higher risk. But I didn’t know data was available.

      Quickly though, I assume the study was saying ‘if you get an injury from an e-bike, the fatality rate is 11% from that injury’ not that the fatality rate for anyone who rides an e-bike is 11%. So the comparison to the Mt Everest fatality rate wouldn’t be accurate in that case.

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      1. Thank you, the Mt Everest comment bothered me too. Not an e bike fan but that’s obviously an apple and oranges statistic.

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    4. Not all e-bikes are “motorcycles” – a lot of them are pedal-assist, in that they give you a little boost as YOU pedal but don’t cruise with no effort.

      I loathe the “motorcycle” kind, though. Delivery people use them on sidewalks and careen past you, and people who don’t have enough cycling experience to stay in control at that speed have no business using them.

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      1. OP here and definitely – pedal assist e bikes don’t go very fast and require work, while class 2 or 3 or unlabeled bikes are really just mopeds or motorcycles. The latter are the issue.

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      2. Right, and the article goes into the difference among the different types of ebikes and how poorly they’re legislated since there are different categories of speed, battery or engine power, etc.

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    5. I live in a very hilly area with lots of winding roads, and there is a gaggle of maybe 3-5 early teen boys on e-scooters who ride 3 abreast in the road on curves that I know most cars take too fast. They are conscientious and typically get out of the way if they see a car, but it is just a setup for disaster on hairpin turn roads. I now drive the road down from my house at 15 mph because I worry I’ll come around a curve and they’ll be there poking along in the middle of the road at 10 mph or whatever. (The speed limit on the road is 25, before someone tells me that I must’ve been driving unsafely before this. I think most people are doing 30-35, which is its own problem).

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    6. I agree with the motorbike aspect, but this crowd went crazy when I mentioned getting an e-bike for my 12 yo. It was the best decision I ever made. He went from hating the bike to using all the time. It gives pedal assit.

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          1. Pedal assist is taking that preteen from maxing at 13 MPH to 20 MPH. So, yes. They are making it more dangerous in that alone. Now add in that the movement is slightly different from what folks around them expect, and you have a more dangerous situation inherently.

    7. I hate that people keep calling them e-bikes when really they are e-motorcycles and should be treated as such.

      There are electric pedal bikes that require pedaling or they don’t move. They are a great booster for anyone who wants to get into biking to work or school but has hills on their route and doesn’t want to arrive sweaty. And then there are electric motorcycles. Ordinary motorcycles rules should apply to electric motorcycles.

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    8. Amen! They’ve outlawed them on some of the busier streets in my suburb, and I’ve seen so many near misses and absolute ignoring stoplights. They’re now banning them at some of our parks and preserves because of the dangers to pedestrians. Wish they had never been invented. Buying your kid one of these and not supervising use seems like the dumbest move a parent can do. They don’t know rules of the road like drivers and are far more dangerous to dog walkers, elderly and other kids who can’t get out of the path fast enough. There’s a good reason they’re getting banned.

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      1. I regularly see kids riding with their helmets dangling. I am sure their parents think their kids are “responsible” and they promised to always wear a helmet.

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    9. Going downhill my mom’s pedal assist e-bike absolutely cleared 30 MPH, fwiw. The idiot sons and son in laws tried to see who could get it to go the fastest on Tgiving. Eye roll.

      A 13 year old kid in the town over from me was killed just before thanksgiving on an “e-dirt bike” – absolutely slammed in to a car making a legal left turn. Some speculate the driver, who is about 65 so not exactly extremely elderly, didn’t appropriately anticipate how fast the bike was coming at him. The kid had no helmet and died immediately. They are unregulated and so very, very dangerous. Others speculate the kid didn’t have any sense of street safety/laws, and just bulldozed through the car for whatever the reason. The kid was going well above the 30 MPH speed limit per witnesses. Just so sad and absolutely, painfully avoidable.

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      1. Utterly preventable in ten different ways. I feel bad for the poor driver who has to live with this now. I wasn’t there and don’t know the details, but from what you’ve shared, it doesn’t sound at all like the driver’s fault. Such a tragedy for the kid and his family too – the mistakes of youth shouldn’t end in violent death.

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  4. WWYD, church edition. Since COVID, my kids have been crucifers and acolytes in our church. Often kids are younger, but many have done it up to going to college (and strong crucifers are preferred because it is heavy). Lately, it’s just been a cluster — families assigned to say “third Sunday early service” flake out and someone begs us to step in; I then sign up my kids, get confirmation back from a rector, and my kids still really look forward to this. Then we show up and there are so many kids there that there are no jobs for them to do and no adult seems to know what to do or who really counts as having signed up or who is in charge and they never get picked to serve (even though one is largely the staff favorite summer crucifer when no one else is in town). It’s really affecting how my kids feel about church (and it’s amazing how they feel where they have a job to do). IDK what to do when most of the time things go sideways. I know it’s all run by volunteers. I fear that if I say something, I will just be told to step up and run the program better or STFU (in a nice, church-y way). I feel like saying something like “we are busy with college tours a lot and want the confirmation class kids to be able to serve; if we are at a service and you find yourself short handed, my kids would love to step in.” Part of it is getting there extra-early if they are helping and then having to wait with nothing to do. I haven’t turned around to go home, but I hate sitting there watching them feel crummy. Largely because no one ever bothers to say “sorry, we messed up and we appreciate you showing up early and not sleeping in, but we are letting the confirmation class kids do it as part of learning for confirmation” or something else to smooth things over. OTOH, if they run things poorly, the natural consequence would be that people won’t want to volunteer (and selfishly, I don’t want my kids to fade away from having a church community in their lives, but their friends have quit going and where there is a community, there isn’t much of one for them now). WWYD?

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    1. ahhhh do we go to the same church (probably not because this only happens with acolytes but otherwise I could have written your post word for word). Following for advice.

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    2. Serious question- would one of your kids be the right age to help manage the assignments? Are there other assignments (ushering? choral work?) that they might be able to take on if the other jobs are taken?

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    3. I think there are two occasions where you can bring this up: First, when the call goes out for volunteers to fill in for the assigned acolytes who can’t make it, ask if the confirmation class will be handling it like last time. This is especially useful if it’s a public forum, like a group chat, because others may join in and everyone will see the question and any answer. The second time & place is your annual parish meeting, which is where you share your observation about youth engagement and you suggest a solution.

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    4. Skip all that nonsense and go to the rector. Volunteers are a church’s most precious asset – if they’re being mismanaged, that should set five alarm fire bells for the rector.

      “John, just wanted you to know that there’s a great deal of disorganization with the acolytes (**and here’s the important part**), to the point where my children aren’t enjoying it as much anymore. Some Sundays there are too many volunteers, other days there aren’t enough. Could you please see about getting a better management system implemented? Thank you.”

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    5. Stop volunteering for this particular ministry. If they have too many volunteers and not enough jobs, that seems like an obvious reason to step back.

      Or, this can be an opportunity for a lesson about charity and selflessness and the different ways of giving back. “They asked for more people to show up than they have jobs for, and that’s disappointing, but one way we can be of service is to be gracious in making ourselves available and handling the disappointment when we aren’t needed. Let’s take this extra time to settle in, pray quietly, read the Bible, make sure we’ve gone to the bathroom before services, or take a walk outside.”

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    6. Oh I have thoughts and this is going to be long. Apologies in advance for the novel.

      I was the “Acolyte Mom” (officially “Acolyte Coordinator” but nobody actually called me that) for the better part of a decade. The second weekend of every month I sent out the schedule for the following month, plus a call for availability for the next month. This was everyone’s opportunity to tell me that they were not available or request a specific service. Once the schedule went out and not including emergencies like illness, everyone was responsible for finding their own sub. They could do this one on one or by sending out a group email. In any event, it was never “five people volunteered and any of them might show up.” It was always Joe will take John’s spot. If they made private arrangements, I asked them to let me know since we included the names of the acolytes in the bulletins. The only time we would have multiple people showing up was if it was a night before type of situation.

      If I understand correctly part of the issue is that you/your kids are volunteering to fill in when someone else is not available and this is being coordinated by your rector? And then multiple people are showing up? This is something that needs to be addressed with the clergy/verger/whoever is running the service. They would never disrespect adults’ time that way and they should not do it to kids (or their parents who have to drive them to church). If your church does not have a single person coordinating the acolytes, then can whoever handles the rest of the youth programming have that conversation? But in any event one person needs to be responsible for this and it should probably not be your rector – whose just wants enough bodies and is trying to coordinate too many moving parts while also getting ready for the service. It is better to have too few acolytes and be trolling the congregation for someone to fill in than have too many and turn them off. The clergy needs to be reminded that this is a youth ministry as much as it is a service ministry and if they are trying to create lifelong attendees, they need to treat the kids as valued members of the congregation.

      Also just deciding to sub in the confirmation class when there are people scheduled without notice is not ok and someone needs to talk to whoever is making that call and point that out. But this is another thing that should be handled through whoever is coordinating this program if that person exists. Otherwise, I suggest basically sending your message here to everyone who touches the youth program, including the rector.

      And your concern about being drafted is valid! That is the way churches work; if you complain you will be invited to fix it. I took over this position from another mom with kids in the program as her children were aging out (and she was taking on the calling committee). It is a lot work.

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      1. OP here and a problem is that too many people have a hand in running it, so no one really runs it. There is one rector and maybe 6 assistant rectors and one deacon. They only use Signup Genuis for Holy Week and the Christmas/Christmas Eve services. Otherwise, the assistant rector who sends out an e-mail may not even preach at that service (or 5th Sundays, which are a scramble because we don’t have them every month). And various adults are sometimes acolyte captains on a per-service basis and use text and e-mails, sometimes to the kids and sometimes to the adults, but often aren’t there at all (so now I carry a lighter to church because often there is no one there to light candles in a pinch but me). It is a hot mess. And there is never enough training or explaining, which I think should probably be a refresher each fall after many families take the summer off, so often they desperately need at least one older kid who knows what to do so that the new kids can just carry torches.

        The 5:00 service uses no acolytes and I think the lay readers carry the cross. Maybe we will sleep in and just go to that service for a while and chill? But first, we think they have slots on xmas eve, but at least they don’t have to wake up early for that.

        I agree — no other ministry would fly if it routinely burned bridges with people and didn’t care that that was happening. It feels weird to me to complain, since I live a life of comfort and they are dealing with capital-P Problems.

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        1. Ugh – this can be such a great ministry but it really needs to have a person responsible for training and a person responsible for logistics (that can be the same person but does not have to be). In our church, our deacon does training but that is largely because he is great with kids. And one of the parents does the logistics. I did it for a long, long time on the theory that if you want something done, do it yourself, but usually people take it on for a year or two.

          Without knowing your people it is hard to offer advice. My only suggestion would not to ghost them (just drop out without saying why). At least send your rector an email basically saying what you said here and telling them they either need to get organized or you are going to pull your kids out before they start resenting it more than they do now. And make it clear (assuming this is true) that you do not have the bandwidth to take this on because otherwise you will be suggested as the person to fix it. This might not be a capital-P problem, but it is a problem and it needs to be addressed (also lighting candles with a lighter you carry around? do you not have altar guild? or a sacristy? You are making me appreciate my relatively well-run church more and more!)

          Also, hopefully those adults are texting groups of kids and not individuals, which I can basically guarantee you is against diocesan rules.

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    7. As a very involved church volunteer, I would simply take my kids off the roster. My observation is that when a program or ministry is poorly run there is nothing you can do to fix it short of taking it over and running it yourself (if that chance is offered), and even then there may be factors outside of your control that make fixing the problems impossible. Your real options in the face of dysfunction are to put up and shut up or to quit.

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  5. How many pairs of jeans do you own, and what type?

    I sorta stopped wearing jeans for years but I’m coming back around. For anyone else with wider hips – the American Eagle or Old Navy Curvy lines are great. I felt like a kid but the jeans fit well so whatever!

    One thing is I don’t like the extra high waists, and wide leg pants don’t look good on me. The fact that the 2000s are coming back in style works for me.

    Anyways, I have one pair light colored straight jeans and one pair black skinny-ish jeans

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      1. Yes, in winter I wear jeans nine days out of ten, so I have many pairs. (At least ten? Two black, one grey, three trouser cut very dark blue, two regular jeans colour, one pattern, one stonewash, one coloured…)

        I cycle to work in regular clothes unless the rain is truly torrential or it’s snowing heavily, and I’m quite curvy, so I wear my jeans out at the crotch quicker than average. Hence the many pairs – it’s either that and rotate them, or four or five pairs and replace them quite frequently (which is annoying). This way I can also send a couple off for repair and still have plenty of choice.

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    2. Four: two pairs mid-rise straight leg (dark wash Lois, grey NYDJ) and two pairs high-rise wide leg (black, grey; both Reitmans).

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    3. I own a lot more – but currently fitting well enough to wear:
      – 4 pairs Levi’s ribcage jeans in different colours and lengths
      – 1 pair Uniqlo high-waisted fitted hip, slightly wider than straight leg
      – 3 pairs high-waisted cigarette fit jeans.
      The cigarette pairs are my most recent purchases. I’m so over wide leg.

      I also keep a pair of Madewell high-waisted ankle straigths and a pair of black skinnies for a different part of my hormone cycle. In storage, more ribcage and skinnies. I donate all wide leg I don’t wear at the moment.

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    4. I think I only have 2 pairs that currently fit. I rarely wear jeans though. Fully remote so I’m in athleisure most of the time, and then dresses for nicer events.

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  6. I suspect I am way on the far end of the spectrum, but I only had 1 pair for a while because I wear they so rarely (just on casual Fridays at the office). I knew this was a risky situation, so when the butt finally ripped on that pair, I suffered through shopping until I found 2 pairs of straight leg jeans and 2 pairs of flares. I also am heavier on bottom and hate wide-legged pants, but I have found Levi’s slim straight and GAP and Loft flare jeans work quite well for my body shape.

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