Tuesday’s Workwear Report: Aaliyah Dress

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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

Occasionally, when I’m shopping around for items to feature in these posts, I come across something that results in an audible squeal of delight when I click on it. This is one of those clicks.

I love everything about this dress from 11 Honoré. The large abstract print is fun without being visually overwhelming, and the shape is super flattering. Plus, it’s machine washable!

The dress is $248 and comes in sizes 0–3, which are roughly equivalent to sizes 10–24.

Two options in regular sizes are from White House Black Market (on sale for $119.99, 00–18) and Karl Lagerfield Paris ($138, 0–14).

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Sales of note for 2/14/25 (Happy Valentine's Day!):

  • Nordstrom – Winter Sale, up to 60% off! 7850 new markdowns for women
  • M.M.LaFleur – Save up to 25% on select suiting, this weekend only
  • Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase — and extra 60% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + 15% off (readers love their suiting as well as their silky shirts like this one)
  • Boden – 15% off new season styles
  • Eloquii – 300+ styles $25 and up
  • J.Crew – 40% of your purchase – prices as marked
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site and storewide + extra 50% off clearance
  • Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Flash sale ending soon – markdowns starting from $15, extra 70% off all other markdowns (final sale)

Sales of note for 2/14/25 (Happy Valentine's Day!):

  • Nordstrom – Winter Sale, up to 60% off! 7850 new markdowns for women
  • M.M.LaFleur – Save up to 25% on select suiting, this weekend only
  • Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase — and extra 60% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + 15% off (readers love their suiting as well as their silky shirts like this one)
  • Boden – 15% off new season styles
  • Eloquii – 300+ styles $25 and up
  • J.Crew – 40% of your purchase – prices as marked
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site and storewide + extra 50% off clearance
  • Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Flash sale ending soon – markdowns starting from $15, extra 70% off all other markdowns (final sale)

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

234 Comments

  1. Has anyone used the Chi Spin N Curl curling iron? Just stumbled across it and am intrigued. How does it compare to a regular curling iron?

    1. Almost embarrassed to post this but I got it with a gift card right after Christmas annnnd…mine is still in the box. I watched a ton of videos before I bought it and I think it’s going to be great for clumsy me who has never met a curling iron I was able to use the right way. I WFH and haven’t had a reason to really do my hair so that’s why it’s still unboxed. But I have date night this weekend and plan on using it, and will report back!

  2. I’ll try this again because I posted too late yesterday and think it’s a fun topic:
    I recently saw two lists on blogs that I thought would be perfect to try with this community. A “master list” of products – your favorite, can’t live without items, small or big – and “pro tips” – eye-opening things you think everyone should know or super helpful life hacks. So, what’s on your master list and what are your pro tips to share?

    1. I’ll play!
      Random products I love:
      Zojirushi fuzzy logic rice cooker – perfect rice, and I also use it to have steel cut oatmeal ready in the mornings, and for cooking lentils
      Maybelline color tattoo eyeshadow – drugstore price and stays forever, doesn’t crease
      Rothy’s pointed toe flats – so comfortable, and cute enough
      Yeti tumblers

      Pro tips:
      Check out ebooks and audiobooks from your local library online – free, instant books
      Tip I picked up here: use contact lens cases for small amounts of face lotions, etc for travel

      1. Life hack: our mail is delivered to a P.O. box, and all junk mail is recycled at the post office. So much less paper.

        1. The best thing about a PO Box is not having to shovel out your mailbox when the plow buries it.

          1. Or having to replace your mailbox when the plow runs it over and destroys it. Ask me how I know.

          2. +1 this is why we switched to a PO Box exclusively. DH yanked the old mailbox out of the ground and solved that chore.

            I’m jealous of anon 9:44 post office though – our tiny post office insists on putting all the junk mail in the boxes, and a couple years ago removed the trash/recycling bin in the lobby area. So all the junk mail still has to be dealt with at home.

      2. I coincidentally set up Libby (library app) in February 2020 and it ended up being a lifesaver during the first few months of the pandemic when I was home and the libraries were closed. I do a lot of waitlisting of books now, so only have to buy books rarely (like when the list is really long or I really want to be able to reread the book)

      3. Products:
        I love, love, love my Wusthof Ikon knives, knife upgrades are so worth it.
        I got a 9 quart Le Creuset Dutch oven for Xmas, and we call it “Ina” because at last I can make the full soup recipes from Ina Garten without scaling down.
        Paula’s Choice 2% Salicylic Acid BHA exfoliating lotion. A friend recommended it, I’m very reluctant to use skin products on my face because I have rosacea, but I’ve only been using it for about 2 weeks and my skin actually does look more even and glowy.
        Rubbermaid diamond brilliance airtight storage containers (the square ones that are microwave/freezer safe). They stack neatly both in the cupboards and in the refrigerator/freezer. The 1.3 cup containers for frozen soup, curry, etc. are the perfect size to assist with portion control. Also I just got a brother label maker to label my frozen stash and I love making labels.

        Pro tip:
        Make a batch of steel cut oatmeal, freeze in a muffin tin and then store the pucks in the freezer in the airtight container of your choice, microwave the puck as needed, and shake a ton of Everything But the Bagel on it. I like savory for breakfast and this has made me into a consistent oatmeal eater. It also makes a great healthy afternoon snack that scratches the “tortilla chip/pretzel/I need something salty” itch.

        Don’t ever put away your storage containers without the lid firmly attached to each piece. Yes it takes more space but then you won’t have a drawer of 15 mismatched lids and 6 storage bottoms. See Rubbermaid product above!

        1. Oooooh… knife upgrade! Which knives do you have? (not brand, obv, but size/type) I’ve been thinking of upgrading mine forever but get overwhelmed by options. I cook a lot. This would be a great bday present to myself this year.

          1. 6 inch chef and the Ikon 7 inch Santoku, which is my preferred go to. I also love my very sharp paring knife, which is ludicrously expensive but so much better than the throwaway paring knives I also have. My husband will use the 8 inch chef’s knife but I find it’s a bit too big for me. I highly recommend going somewhere like Crate and Barrel or Sur la Table etc where you can actually handle the knives. Also Ikon just put out an extra wide 6 inch chef’s knife for easier carrying of chopped up material to the pot, which I think I might get!

          2. how often do you have to sharpen them? Do you do it yourself or have it done?

          3. I have the electric sharpener recommended by the wirecutter and run them through every six months. No putting them in the sink, I use a magnetic knife strip, and I don’t use them for opening plastic, boxes etc,

    2. Things I use and love everyday: my inherited cast iron skillet and my Ugg Ryland slipper/sneakers.

      Life hacks: Revitabrow and dying my eyebrows and lashes. I don’t bother with any eye makeup, just keep up with these two things.

    3. A few good product “must haves” others on this blog might like –
      – Neutrogena Revitalizing Lip Balm – comes in a few colors, has SPF, cheap enough to keep in multiple locations
      – Cerave Hydrating Facial Wash (learned about it here, thanks for the reco to whoever gave it)
      – Classic Birkenstocks (Major foot issues prepandemic, wore these for the past two years, changed my feet, no more pain!)

    4. Beauty stuff:
      Biore one minute warning mask: gets no love In the world but makes me feel so much better about my skin.
      Christophe robin salt scrub/shampoo: the one way ticket to the prettiest hair.
      Diptych candle in vanille: I think this is what heaven smells like
      Dr Dennis gross alpha beta peel + sheet mask before bed = wake up looking great.

      Life hacks (things I always remind myself)
      People really do want to come over for pizza and wine- you do not have to cook to host.
      Make the darn grocery list and plan your meals-you’ll be happier than if you wing it.
      Hire a weekly housekeeper if you can reasonably afford it.
      Leasing cars is a hassle that I don’t want to deal with every three years: buy one slightly used and then you can decide when it’s time to upgrade.

      1. +1 for weekly housekeeper. We do every other week, and my happiness skyrockets after they come and our house is clean!

      2. Lol, my hack is lease cars so you never deal with maintenance and always have something new!

      3. + to the Christophe Robin salt scrub. Have you tried the volumizing clay shampoo? Also amazing.

    5. Funny that I cannot think of a product that I absolutely love and am loyal to. But I appreciate the ones other people post here from time to time and often try them.
      My Best life hack has been to buy less stuff. My life got easier when I had fewer items to manage/store/dispose of/etc.

    6. I’m loyal to Dove bars of soap, Nalgene water bottles, Blundstone boots, Sacony running shoes, Haagen Dazs ice cream, and Clos du Bois cabernet.

      1. Your bringing up cabernet is interesting – I never know what brands of wine are reliably decent at the grocery store.

        1. As an aside, the Kim Crawford Sauvignon Blanc is a great bottle for the price.

          1. I’ll add the Artea rose to the great cheap wines list. It’s $10. I first picked it up on a rec from a wine guy, and now it’s our house wine.

        2. Always getting the clos du bois is my biggest time saver. I literally spend no time/mental energy on choosing wine. It’s good, I like it, it’s $14. Everybody wins.

          Of course I’ll drink other wine , but if I’m buying this is my go to.

    7. Flat back earrings. After having to re-pierce my ears (myself) due to not wearing earrings in 2020, I found some cubic zirconia studs that I leave in all the time.

      1. Piggy backing off this – Missoma huggies. Comfortable to be worn 24/7 and suitable for all occasions.

    8. Nespresso! Truly a lifesaver while I was studying for the bar exam. Also, Hoka running shoes, Orgain protein powder, and L’Oreal Voluminous mascara.

    9. JessiCurl hair products
      Old Navy t-shirts
      Colour Pop lip sticks

      Tip: keep a quart jar of sofrito in the fridge to make cooking faster. I buzz together white onion, garlic, green bell peppers, cilantro and parsley in the food processor. It adds lots of flavor and takes much less time than chopping vegetables for every meal.

        1. I use it in almost anything that calls for diced onions. It’s a good addition to jarred spaghetti sauce to add flavor,

          I will drop a teaspoon into the skillet with a bit of oil if I am making scrambled eggs for breakfast. It will cook as the skillet is heating. Same with adding to lunch if I am making ramen. I have gotten hooked on Vite Ramen’s naked noods, that come without spice packets, so I can toss in softito and leftover meat and have a quick, somewhat healthy lunch,

          It bumps up the flavor of steamed spinach without turning it into a salt fest. I then use the mix to stuff pork loin or chicken breasts and throw them in the air fryer. Easy supper that doesn’t need a separate vegetable.

    10. Banana Boat Aloe lip balm with sunscreen, Super Goop Hand Screen and Shiseido waterproof sunscreen. Body Shop Shea Body Butter and L’Occitane lavender hand cream. Bumble and Bumble hair care. Brooks walking shoes, Merrell trail runners. An iPad and a leather case to protect it from dropping. And reorganize one shelf or drawer each weekend. And Eat the Frog.

    11. Products:
      Biossance skincare
      Trader Joe’s almond coconut creamer
      Yeti for all to go drinks
      Start Planner
      Stasher bags
      Souper Cubes

      Tips:
      – If your underarms tend to smell even with deodorant, swipe with a stridex pad before deodorant
      – Use souper cubes to freeze leftover meals in single serve sizes and sauces/compund butters in even smaller cubes
      – Freeze sauce/soup in bags FLAT – then they can be stored like files would be standing up
      – Keep a basket at the bottom of the stairs to throw stuff in and bing it up with you (and down) when full
      – For daily contacts, if your prescrip is different in each eye, use a sharpie to mark the individual packaging with R or L that way you can get rid of the box or store the box elsewhere while keeping a week/months worth at hand
      – Message a new-to-you online brand on facebook or dm on other social and tell them you’re excited to use their products for the first time and ask for a coupon code. Works 80%+ of the time!

    12. Lanolin works wonders on dry lips in the winter. It’s sticky but a tiny bit before bed makes a huge difference.

      I recently realized that almost every time I am in a funk my solution is to Just Add Water. I either need to drink more (water or hot tea), or take a long hot bath or shower, or go for a swim.

    13. Minnetonka Kilty Moccasins
      Dyson Air Wrap
      Cerave Hydrating Facial Cleanser
      KVD Google Apple Foundation
      Verb Ghost Shampoo & Conditioner
      Rough & Tumble Double Zip City Safari Bag
      Bose Noise Canceling Headphones
      Viv Collection Leggings
      Kinky Curly Curling Custard

    14. Product: Restoration hardware towels.
      Pro tip: spending the time to fold clothes nicely is makes for a very calming experience each time you open a closet or drawer. Also, organizing your kiddos things by color (clothes and books especially) makes it much easier to find them fo both you and this kiddo.

    15. As far as products go, Laneige is really the best for dry lips in the winter. It’s a splurge but worth it. Nars blush and eyeliner. The eyeliner stays put. Cheap Maybelline mascara because you are supposed to change it every 3-6 months.

      Life hack is never rely on your own brain. Write it down, put it in your calendar app and have an alert/reminder or else you will forget even if you think you won’t.

      1. “because you are supposed to change it every 3-6 months” is what the companies selling mascara tell us. Ten to fifteen years ago it used to be 6-12. Before that, I never heard of “needing” to buy new mascara so frequently. You just bought a new tube when the old one got too clumpy or dry.

    16. Master List:
      Bombas socks
      Spotify “like” function/list and resulting made for me playlists
      Bluetooth speakers – have both Bose Soundlink and UE Megaboom. Like them both
      Kindle
      iPhone – had to use an android for 1 week in December and never.again.
      Starbucks App for ordering ahead
      Ninja Foodi 11 in 1 – airfryer/pressure cooker
      Lodge large dutch oven

      Pro Tips
      -Skip leaving reviews or doing company surveys. I never find satisfaction in this and it’s an endless time suck.
      -Meal plan for the whole month at the beginning of the month
      -Buy the flowers that catch your eye in the grocery store
      -Answer emails immediately if at all possible, and then move to a folder
      -Invitations are not summons; you don’t have to go to things if you don’t want to just because you’re invited.
      -saying no to things you don’t want to do makes the things you say yes to way more enjoyable. This especially applies to volunteer work/community work. When you say yes to the things you really don’t want to do, it taints everything else.
      -Take hoodies to conferences to immediately change into when you get back to your car.

    1. This would look terrible on me, but I love that it exists in the world. Much like that red-and-pink bubblegum suit I still think about.

    2. Same. Not in my sizes sadly. I love a black/white pattern / print that is not floral and not a sort of B- color blocking. I have a blouse like this from years ago that I had a slight velcro accident with and yet I am like “eh, it camoflauges its issues as well as mine.” And it does. Until we are back to sharp workwear every day, it still makes the grade, especially if under a Juliette sweater coat type piece.

    3. Yes – I always admire folks in bold prints and wish they looked better on me than they do.

    4. I like it, but that slit is going to be SO HIGH when she sits down. There isn’t enough material in the skirt, and it is going to gap open right over her lap.

  3. Looking for advice…my boss recently switched roles internally, and I will no longer be reporting to her. She was one of the best bosses I’ve ever had, and was extremely supportive of me and my career. I’m very happy for her (her new role is a step up), but also devastated. As a result, when we had our last 1:1 I was not sentimental at all and pretty much just said “thanks, see you around” because I knew I would start crying if I tried to say anything about how much I appreciate her. I should send her a note, right? We’re still working remotely – is email appropriate? Hand written feels a little formal for our relationship, but is that what’s called for here? She posted a “thank you” to our team of 10 on Microsoft Teams, fwiw.

    1. It might be worth trying to keep up a regular mentoring relationship with her if she’s interested!

  4. Looking for tips to find a simple shell/blouse for work. The key here is I like bright jewel tones. I feel like we’ve been stuck in a very neutral/pastel phase in fashion for some time. I found the colors I want in a fast fashion line on the river site, but the construction is just too cheap for me. TIA!

    1. L.L.Bean’s Pima Cotton Tees are what you are looking for. I have at least 6 in different bright colors, sleeve lengths and neck shapes. Great quality, affordable, hold up great, and even the light colors are opaque enough to wear without a blazer. These also seem to be the only boatneck T-shirts available currently.

    2. The Didion top from MM LaFleur. It comes in a few jewel colors, and is machine washable and flattering!

    3. I haven’t checked them out in a couple years, but this sounds like something Boden might have.

    4. The Nordstrom Halogen cap sleeve blouse is good for this, and the colors/patterns change frequently.

    5. Antoino Melani at Dillards has a cobalt silk blouse, but not much else in brights. You might look at Trina Turk, she often has brights in the mix.

  5. I recently discovered that my trusty old Sorels that I’ve had for 10+ years have a crack in them, and now I’m in the market for new boots. I am torn between wanting something new/trendier or going with the same old Sorels again (because I know they last forever)! Are Sorels still considered classic or do they look outdated these days? Are there any newer styles that are also built to last? For example I love the look of Marc Fisher’s Izzie boot, but there are enough reviews mentioning poor quality to make me nervous about that investment.

    1. I love my Ugg Adirondack boots. I’ll never go back to Sorels after wearing these.

    2. I’m late to post, but in my mountain resort town, every local wears Sorels. I’ve had mine for 27 years! I consider them a classic.

  6. If you could move anywhere in the continental US, where would you go? I just took a remote position and I’m looking for a change. I currently live in a LCOL area in the Midwest currently, and I’m looking to move somewhere with a lot more outdoorsy opportunities. Don’t need a big city by any means. I also have two large dogs that I’d be taking, so I’d most likely need to buy a home. Thoughts?

    1. What’s your budget and how do you define “outdoorsy” (ie, what activities do you enjoy)?

      1. +1 outdoorsy means different things to different people. To me it means going to the beach, hiking, mountains nearby (so SoCal is perfect for me).

        1. +2, also, think about impact on other things like travel. I would not be happy if I didn’t live near a hub airport thus requiring connections to get anywhere else.

      2. OP here! More details: budget for a house would be about $400k. Single, low 30s, no kids, just the dogs. Hiking, camping, kayaking are my preferences. Beaches are ok, but not my fave. My family is all over the country so not worried about that. Within a 3 hour drive to an airport would be ideal, but that’s negotiable.

        1. Check out Central Oregon. Bend proper is expensive, but some of the smaller towns around there might work. Maybe Madras.

        2. Hmm, that budget rules out most of the west, unless you go pretty rural. So depending on your weather and political preferences, I’d look for somewhere in the mountains in the SE (one of the Carolinas?), New England (might be out of your budget, but some rural areas could work), or Minnesota/Wisconsin/Michigan. Also, make sure your health insurance will work in whatever state you pick.

        3. North Florida has the hiking, kayaking, camping, you’re within 3 hours of an airport and you can find a decent home in your price range. Downsides are that outside of a few places, you’re in MAGA country, the dating scene is garbage and it’s very car dependent.

        4. Marquette, Michigan is a great place and ticks all those boxes. And almost everyone has a dog. The winters are extreme, but they afford a lot of outdoor snow activities and it is a dry cold vs. a wet cold.

        5. The Laurel Highlands, in south western Pennsylvania. Lots of small towns, or rural areas, whichever you prefer. Lots of housing to choose from within your budget. Close to Pittsburgh airport, not too bad of a drive to DC or Baltimore. Lots of mountains for hiking and good white water rafting. Not too long of a drive to the beach for long weekend trips.

    2. you need to be a little more specific about what is important to you. do you want to be near an airport? easy access to medical care? family/friends? etc. does outdoorsy mean hiking/mountains, does it mean lakes, beach, skiing etc.?

    3. My long-term goal was always to move to the WA-OR region, for the climate and outdoor activities. But now it’s constantly on fire, so…I dunno. Hard to duplicate the only temperate rainforest around.

      1. My sibling just moved to WA state, about 60-90 min from Seattle and absolutely loves it. She’s very outdoorsy and has endless opportunities for outdoor adventures both in the winter and in the summer. This sounds like it may fit the OP’s bill. If you don’t need to be very close to Seattle, I think prices are somewhat reasonable.

    4. Ignoring cost and proximity of family and friends which in reality would be my biggest concerns, Denver.

      1. Colorado is the one state in the continental US many companies do not allow remote work from. Something about the state labor rules, I think?

        1. Colorado passed a pay transparency law that states employers must put the salary range for a job in the job posting. Employers who try to save money by paying people less than market average don’t like that, so they ban Colorado applicants from applying for jobs. Nothing to do with any labor law in CO but that one; the companies who are not getting with the program on pay transparency are the ones with the problem.

        2. Colorado requires that companies disclose salary in their job postings and some employers balk at that.

          1. Yeap. Our JDs for remote work specifically say we won’t hire for work in CO bc of this. I hate it but I don’t make the rules.

    5. With the huge, huge caveat that I have never lived here: Bend, Oregon seems lovely and has an airport. (Although when I fantasy look at Zillow sometimes it appears I am not the only one that has had this thought…).

      1. My sister lives and works there and loves it – but is getting priced out by people from other states buying second homes there!

      2. I spent summers in Bend for years and it’s a magical place – lakes, mountains, desert – just beautiful.

    6. I would move somewhere close to family and friends. If you’re already there and are looking to get away for a few years, I’d do somewhere out west like Colorado.

    7. How do you feel about heat, humidity, mosquitos? Do you like or loathe flat landscapes? I would go somewhere like Wilmington / Little Washington NC for the water access, but I’m a big water person and OK with heat, humidity, and mosquitos. Western NC (like by Western Carolina Univ) if you like a bit more hills / cold weather; Boone if you need full-on winter.

      I love college towns as an adult though — there is always something going on.

    8. My husband is a college prof so we can’t live anywhere but college towns, but he’s convinced Eugene, OR would be the optimal place to live. Temperate weather, reasonably LCOL, near lots of pretty nature and not far from the ocean, has it’s own airport (the worst thing about our current college town in the Midwest is that we’re over an hour from the nearest commercial airport). On bitter winter days and scorching hot summer days, he regularly tells me the (much more pleasant) temperature in Eugene. Although I second what someone else said about the PNW being on fire all the time now. I have asthma so I think it would be really challenging to live anywhere with wildfire smoke.

      1. I live in Little Rock, so this was my first thought as well for the outdoors and a great cost of living. I have a small house but live in a great neighborhood with a lake, and the house was fully updated from the 1950s. I paid $150k! My commute is 15 mins to get downtown. I can drive less than 1 hour in any direction and be hiking or at a lake.

        The (major) downside is the political situation here. Once you get out of certain neighborhoods, this state is deep red, to the point that Sarah Huckabee Sanders will probably be our next governor.

    9. If I didn’t have to worry about cost and distance from my people, I’d do San Diego. I’ve yet to meet an outdoorsy activity I don’t like so proximity to beach and mountains would be awesome. I hate the cold so would love the climate. I work in security/intel so could likely find a civilian job with the DOD. I love cities for fun reasons (always something to do, I like going out, I love concerts and going to sports games and really good food) and practical reasons (airports, sometimes public transportation, major hospitals, usually a university or 2).

      Basically my criteria would be a decent sized city in a warmer climate with access to water and mountains where I could do my job and San Diego fits that perfectly.

      Alas, my family and friends are all on the east coast and California/San Diego is very expensive.

    10. Most cities that meet this description have been overrun by remote workers in the last couple years and have skyrocketing rents/housing prices and shortages of services. It’s put a massive strain on the infrastructure in a lot of small towns and priced out a lot of the people that live there, so especially if you’re coming from a LCOL area, things might be a lot more expensive and harder to get than you’d anticipate.

      1. If you don’t need to commute and like the outdoors you can live in a pretty rural area, and many of those are still cheap.

        1. More rural areas are definitely cheaper, but there’s a big difference between living in a large city, a small city, a small town, and an actual rural area, so it would be helpful to know where OP is coming from and what her expectations are. I’ve lived in all of those places, and even people who think they’re outdoorsy and don’t care about city stuff can end up having a hard time not having easy access to major airports, hospitals, even just regular doctors without having to drive a couple hours and wait six months to get an appointment. It’s a lot easier now that you can buy things online, but there are still a lot of things you need to do in with local workers, including any kind of home construction, which seems to be backlogged everywhere right now.

          1. OTOH, my city has a great airport that is 10 minutes away on a Saturday morning (if there is no marathon or road race) and a hot mess to get to any time I need to fly out. If I lived an hour outside of my city, housing cost would be half and the airport would be just as accessible. Larger towns have satellites of our medical system opening up there. It really is do-able if you can work out the kinks before committing.

      2. Hm. I’m sure you’re thinking of a town near you that this applies to, but it certainly doesn’t apply to outdoorsy, rural areas near me. The US is huge, after all. My waterfront house in a town with an adorable main street is hardly overrun. In fact, generally, a few more lifelong elderly residents die every year than new people moving in. But it’s in a ruby red county and you’d have to be willing to coexist with that, so it’s not exactly on many telecommuters’ hot list.

        OP, NPR’s Marketplace just did a piece last week on telecommuters moving to Duluth, MN. It might interest you. https://www.marketplace.org/2022/01/28/how-much-is-climate-a-factor-in-where-people-are-moving/

        1. I’m just saying, as someone who has actually lived in several of the places listed here and knows people in a bunch of the others, it’s easy to think you don’t care about living in a city. But as you get a little older (I’m 40!), it’s suddenly way less appealing to have to drive hours every time you want to see a doctor, and wait times for new patients have been a huge issue even in my small city (not rural by any means). Now that my parents are older and I also have some health issues and there’s a pandemic, it’s a lot harder to deal with multiple airline connections or long drives to a bigger airport. Just something to think about before deciding it really doesn’t matter where you live, especially if you’re on your own. I do agree Duluth is great, though!

          1. Co-sign this, just in case anyone is advocating moving to a truly rural area. I grew up in a rural area (literally on a gravel road), and now live in a small city, and the difference is enormous. Highly recommend spending significant time trying to live in a rural area before committing to it just because of the the real estate prices. The houses are cheap for a reason.

    11. It’s hard to beat Colorado, though it is getting pretty expensive compared to just a few years ago. Real seasons (snow season IS long but it’s punctuated by warm sunny days), no bugs, major airport, any number of outdoor activities. Fire is a concern, though the recent fires that burned down developments in the Boulder suburbs were the result of 100+ mph winds as much as they were the dry falls. We’ve had a blessed amount of snow in 2022 so far.

      A very dog-friendly place. I love living in Denver, but cost and availability of housing is a factor here. For proximity to outdoor adventures, I’d also look at Fort Collins, Evergreen, Golden, Morrison, Boulder (if you can afford it), and Arvada.

    12. Florida Space Coast or Santa Fe NM. If I suddenly inherited $10million I’d buy a place on the northern California coast.

      1. The northern California coast is actually pretty affordable if you get north of Marin. It’s just the Bay Area that’s insane. If you’re not within commuting distance to SF/Peninsula tech jobs, the costs go WAY down.

      2. We spend a fair amount of time on the Space Coast and I would not call it outdoorsy. Beachy, yes. Outdoorsy, definitely not.

      1. As an alumna of the Naval Postgraduate School, I frequently wonder what I can do to get hired on the staff/faculty…

        1. Love the area, not sure how many banks I’d need to rob to live anywhere but a tent or in my car.

    13. NY or Vermont somewhere historic where I could get a lovely Victorian, perhaps Newburgh or Kingston

    14. I’m seriously eyeing the research triangle in NC for many of the same reasons. Real Estate market is hot hot hot but Durham seems to have more listings within your range. I also live in the Midwest and until I visited Chapel Hill, I didn’t realize how much the consistently blue skies of NC versus the cloud cover here lifted my mood plus the ability to consistently be outside in the winter. It’s a very liberal area (three universities), great health care, diversified economy, lots of good flights, within reach of beaches, mountains, camping, hiking, etc. Supermarket scene in Chapel Hill is outstanding! Wegmans, TJs, Whole Foods, along with other options. Excellent food scene. August would be a swamp, but I wouldn’t miss polar vortices!

      1. As someone who used to live in NC, I agree that Chapel Hill has a lot going for it, but it’s not just August that’s a swamp, it’s May, June, July, September, and often October. Definitely too hot and humid for me, and also probably out of OPs budget at this point, though maybe it depends how big a place she needs. For her, I’d suggest the NC mountains or coast.

      2. I’m in Raleigh. It’s delightful, but housing prices have skyrocketed (zillow thinks my house is now worth $150k+ more than what I paid for it 4 years ago)–you can definitely still find things in your budget depending on what you want, but it’s getting harder and competition is fierce. The summer heat/humidity is A LOT if you aren’t used to it (though I don’t find May or even early June or October bad at all, but I grew up in the South. October is actually perfect beach weather, barring hurricanes), and while we do have access to both the beach and the mountains, I will warn you they are 2-3 hours away so not quite day trip territory. We do have a lot of outdoorsy things in the immediate area (our greenway system and state parks are great), but the scenery is not dramatic, more just green forest and some big hills (there is some varied terrain within an hour or so but true mountains you’ve got to head all the way to winston-salem at least). RDU is a fantastic airport, though. We used to have some good direct international flights, as well–most of those went away in pandemic times, but are slowly coming back.

    15. Literally almost all of Tennessee will have what you’re looking for. I would avoid Nashville and the immediately surrounding counties because of the crazy real estate market. However, pretty well any part of Tennessee had lots of outdoorsy activities, VLCOL and within an hour or two of a large airport. I’m in West Tennessee about halfway between Memphis and Nashville and there’s lots to do here if you like being outside. Very active local kayak group, and if you are looking for hikes anywhere in the state check out the Girls Who Hike Tennessee fb group.

    16. Lexington, Va is a great place. There is the maury river and James for kayaking, lots of hiking, caving, and biking in the surrounding areas. Your housing budget would buy a home there. It isn’t close to a major airport though. It is pretty rural, but the two local colleges keep the small town pretty vibrant for its size. Its weather is pretty temperate for the East Coast.

    17. At $400K, I would say Chattanooga, TN or the Shenandoah valley of VA. You’re priced out of Maine and CO.

      1. She is absolutely not priced out of the entire state (!?) of Maine. My parents own oceanfront property 20 minutes from Acadia national park and their house + property is worth almost exactly $400k. Houses near them that don’t have ocean or lake frontage are <$200k. Maine is rural and mostly pretty cheap, except the ritziest tourist areas like Bar Harbor and Kennebunkport. Even the city of Portland isn’t that expensive if you don’t care about school districts or commute times. There are many, many houses she could purchase in Maine for less than $400k (Google says median home price there is $300k).

      2. You can find a 2br house for under $300k in Fort Collins or Colorado Springs. They go fast, but they exist. The rest of mountainous Colorado? Not so much. I’d rather be in Fort Collins any day from a vibe perspective, but Colorado Springs has some lovely geography.

    18. This really largely depends on how you feel about winters. Minnesota and Wisconsin have hiking, camping, kayaking. Loaded with lakes and streams and rivers, and hiking trails all over (although obv not mountain hiking). Your house budget would go really far and you’d have enough left over for a good SUV with all wheel drive, which I would encourage you to get to feel good in the winters. My rural-ish area has a lot of winter outdoor activities – cross country skiing, fat tire biking, winter hikes, etc. This month in my little town we have some kind of outdoor activity put on by local community groups every weekend. I like Wisconsin because the small towns in the middle/southern part of the state are really only usually a half hour apart, and small size cities within 45 minutes. You have to drive everywhere, sure, but there’s a lot within 30-60 minutes of highway driving. It’s not packed traffic jams. Northwoods WI and MN are going to be way more rural and would be a bigger adjustment.

  7. Have you taken a Chicago River architecture boat tour that you liked (or hated?) They seem pretty similar, but I need to plan a corporate outing for the fall. Thanks!

    1. I took one and enjoyed it very much (as an architecture freak) but it was so scripted that I can’t believe that they’re not all mostly alike. I’m sure the individual guides infuse their personalities into the script but unless someone has collected their names and then a subsequent someone is able to schedule/request that specific guide . . . you see what I mean?

      I could be wrong. There could be a Yelp somewhere with specific guides called out. So this is just an opinion that these people are hired largely on their charm and stamina, so they’re all pretty good!

    2. Chicago’s leading lady have generally been my favorites, but I haven’t had a bad experience on any of them. If you can schedule one for dusk, that is always really pretty.

    3. I think the Shoreline ones are all basically the same script. The Chicago Architecture Foundation offers boat tours on specific topics as well as general ones. They are slightly more expensive but for a corporate outing I imagine it’s not a problem. I’d see if there’s a topic they offer that sounds especially interesting. It’s hard to go wrong with the boat tours though!

    4. I recommend the tours run by the Chicago Architecture Foundation. The guides are trained docents who are able to answer off-script questions. The others can also be good, but the knowledge of the guides is more hit or miss.

      1. Havent taken the others but took this one and definitely recommend!

      2. +1. It is also seriously competitive to be a boat tour docent for the foundation, so they are always top notch!

  8. Help me plan my trip. I need to be in Palm Springs for a weekend in April. I am coming from DC and I cant find any direct flights. I can fly to Burbank or LAX and drive to Palm Springs with friends, but that drive seems crazy during peak spring break weekend. If I fly to Palm Springs its more expensive and takes much, much longer. Another wrinkle or opportunity, my family lives in orange county and it would be nice to see them but thats so much driving. I havent planned a trip in years and all of this is making my head spin. Can someone just take the wheel and tell me what to do.

    1. Burbank and drive. LAX is a nightmare (IMHO) and Burbank is a delightful little airport. Flying in and out of PS is insanely expensive, and if you can’t go direct, it’s not at all worth connecting in LA, it’s very close.

      1. +1. Burbank being way (way!) more pleasant than LAX.

        If you want to see your family, I would fly into SNA (another extremely easy airport), stick around OC for a few days and then drive to Palm Springs. As far as I know, there are no direct flights from DC area to SNA though.

      2. If you do fly into Burbank, allow LOTS of time for the drive. I would take the earliest flight possible because traffic is a nightmare from early afternoon on.

    2. I’ve flown into Ontario California when the Palm Springs flights were sold out. Easy drive. SO MANY WIND TURBINES.

      1. If you don’t mind a stop, and decide not to fly to John Wayne, Ontario is equally as easy and definitely closer than Burbank. I thought OP was prioritizing direct flights (hence only considering Burbank is LAX).

    3. Can you fly into John Wayne? Love that little airport. And shout-out to the wind turbines on the OC to Palm Springs drive!

  9. Would love some work advice (esp from in house attorneys). I have been at my company for about two months and regularly work with a paralegal on the operations side. For whatever reason, she has been very resistant to any of my advice/recommendations (and these are all pretty clearly inarguable points, i.e. certain conduct that I want her to stay away from in order to avoid putting herself and the company at risk). She argues with me about EVERYTHING and refuses to complete tasks that are part of her job (i.e. sending out responsive letters that I’ve drafted after she brought me a user complaint), to the point that I am now scrambling to find someone else who can send those. I tried having an open conversation with her about it, and also to try and figure out if I’d said or done something to offend her, but that went nowhere. I’m now at a loss. Since I’m so new, I’m reluctant to mention this to my boss (the paralegal and I are not on the same vertical so we don’t report to the same boss, a fact she repeatedly points out to me for some reason). My job has otherwise been amazing and people are so kind and helpful, so I really feel stuck here. Please help!

    1. Are you sure she is the person who is supposed to help you with these tasks? I had a similar issue when I first went in house (now at a different company). After talking to someone on my same level who does the same type of work, I learned that the paralegal in our office just didn’t really do the tasks I was trying to ask her to do, whether due to her job description or just the way that her role had developed. At first it was strange because I was used to the law firm where I’d been, where any paralegal or assistant was expected to help any lawyer if necessary (within reason, of course). I had to learn to be a lot more self sufficient just because companies are a lot different from law firms.

      This was a long-winded way of saying I’d first try to gently suss out the situation with a peer to see if everyone has the same issue, if there’s someone else who can do these tasks, etc. If that doesn’t work, I’d go to your boss and see how they normally handle letters, or whatever the specific task is. I would not, under any circumstances, imply to your boss or the paralegal’s boss that she’s not doing a good job (even if she isn’t) because you probably haven’t been there long enough to know the contours of that map.

      1. +1, the paralegals in my legal department might help with drafting the letters but the administrative assistants are the ones helping with literally mailing them. I’d sanity-check your expectations with peers.

      2. Thank you, yes, this is what I thought at first as well, but the tasks are definitely hers (she brought me the issue in the first instance so when I resolved it, it went back to her to complete). But even beyond that I’m more concerned that she’s refusing my advice and my legal recommendations (and I did check with another attorney to make sure I’m not totally off base in my advice). I’m sure I will have to work with her regularly in the future so I want to get a handle on this.

        1. so on the legal advice point. Did you ask her why she is insistent? Maybe before you arrived she gave that advice herself without checking, and is worried about looking bad or wrong if it changes now…

          1. I did ask her and she just points to her SOP that she follows. This stuff is not really in dispute (things like contacts with represented parties) which is why I’m concerned and want to go to my boss about revising the SOP (but obviously do not want to be a tattletale).

          2. I mean yes by all means if there are legal and ethical issues in the SOP they need to be changed and if she is not willing to do so you need to escalate.

          3. +1 to anon at 10:29. You need to make sure there aren’t true legal and ethical issues. I’d still take a more curious tactic with your boss and ask about the SOP and then ask about your concerns with it without bringing up the paralegal specifically. If the SOP is changed, unfortunately you have to just be prepared that this paralegal might hate you forever if she thinks you threw her under the bus.

          4. There is no need to worry about the paralegal “hating you forever” if OP and her boss are professional. Not everything is a massive screwup and a level set doesn’t mean things have gone nuclear. It’s catastrophizing that causes more problems than dealing with them.

        2. Talk to your boss. Nothing frustrates me more as a boss than people who don’t raise issues until they are BIG PROBLEMS. You don’t have to be accusatory, just talk to her about what you’re dealing with.

          1. Thanks, this is what I’m leaning toward. We have a check in tomorrow and I want to bring this up as neutrally as possible.

          2. Then I would just bring it up matter of fact as “hey, I noticed this about our SOPs, can you tell me about how they developed this way? I am seeing an issue with respect to XYZ but may not have all the context.”

  10. Where to go for a long weekend at the end of February? Coming from Florida so not trying to escape the cold. Not interested in skiing but open to other snow activities or a really great winter spa resort. Also open to non-snowy locations. Prefer not a big city, but somewhere with shops, good food and a few things to do.

    1. In late Feb you really have to embrace the snow – we ARE in the cold but Philly doesn’t get enough snow to be festive about it, you know? Maybe Maine – a friend went to the White Barn hotel and omg beautiful?

      1. I was also going to suggest Park City. Bonus is that it is an easy drive from SLC airport.

  11. Has anyone been to the Grand Hyatt Baha Mar in the Bahamas recently, and any recommendations for things to do/restaurants for a couple? We haven’t been before but flights were surprisingly cheap to go there this weekend so doing a last minute trip! And does anyone know of a good place to get a covid test in short order before travel (in Boston ideally)? Looks like a lot of the options around me are booked this week, or are only available for certain groups like healthcare workers.

    1. I was there in February 2020 for a conference. I remember our room being lovely and we had a great time. We enjoyed Cafe Madeleine to pick up coffee and pastries in the morning (loved their pain au chocolat). We also had dinner at Carna – very pricey but delicious. For lunches we did a lot of pool-side ordering. Be prepared for everything at the resort to be insanely priced, but otherwise we really liked it. Because we were at a conference, we didn’t do much beyond hang around the various pools in our free time.

  12. I am having so much trouble focusing! I love my job, the work is somewhat meaningful, and most of the tasks I do are very interesting and in my skill set (though not my previous professional background). I’m doing the work in this field I wanted to do back when I was in school so it feels like I’ve “made it”. Most importantly, it’s setting me up really well so I’m a few years I’ll be able to pivot to a dream position (aka same duties but at a non profit where the work is super meaningful).

    I switched jobs 4 months ago and was able to take a month off between jobs for some needed R&R. Now that my job is less hectic I hit everything we recommend here: I get 8 hours of sleep a night, I workout 6 days a week, I get outside for a walk/workout every day, I drink a lot of water and eat pretty well (at least have fresh fruit/veg with each meal), I have time to spend on my hobbies (which I love) and to socialize.

    I had a great reputation at my old job and I know that played a large role in me getting my current job – which is a bit out of my wheelhouse so was a stretch for me to get.

    No matter what I try I cannot focus! When I have an assignment, it’s a struggle to buckle down and get it done in a timely manner. When I have downtime, I have plenty I can do (training modules, paperwork, background reading) but can’t bring myself to actually work on stuff if there’s no deadline. I don’t want to ruin my rep or throw away this amazing opportunity but I cannot seem to turn it on and get stuff done!

    1. Semi on topic, but volunteer for meaning and rethink a nonprofit as your dream job, my friend.

      1. Not on topic, that’s not helpful, not every nonprofit job is the same. If this poster has found a good nonprofit job, why discourage her?

      2. I volunteer monthly at a soup kitchen!

        I’ve worked in non profits before so am well aware that they have their problems :) but there’s a very niche cause/topic I want to work in and it’s mostly in non profits/NGOs. There’s one large/well resourced non profit in my interest area in my city that I have my eye on – a few friends work there and it seems pretty functional for a non profit (and the pay is better than my former government salary!)

    2. I am in the exact same position. I don’t apply this advice consistently myself, but two things that do help me are 1) leaving my phone in another room and 2) setting deadlines for myself (and if you need more of a fire, email a colleague and tell them “I will get this to you by xx”). I also recently started meditating with the goal of both reducing anxiety and increasing focus – it’s been 21 days and I’m seeing a very small improvement. Hopeful that improvement will continue to grow over time.

    3. Was there something about your previous job that made that level of productivity easier? Has task initiation always been a struggle? Or perhaps that level of stress is having some residual effects, even with that month you took off.

      1. I think I was always bad at it, but got worse when I got overwhelmed/burnt out at my old job.

        My current job is pretty reactive – long periods of nothing (so downtime for non urgent long term projects, training/background learning/staying up on new trends , etc) and then suddenly something happens and there’s a very urgent deliverable needed, so I definitely struggle with both that switch but also with being productive during down time

    4. well, maybe you have ADHD? Can you ask your boss for deadlines? Does it work to set deadlines for yourself? It sounds like you have to create a new work style–whatever you did at your previous job is not working now. Think about: do you like the tasks you have to do? if they are out of your wheelhouse, do you need more support to do them? Can you break them into smaller parts and just tackle one small thing? Are you anxious, and is that interfering with focusing?

      I suggest the Pomodoro method–google it and you will find lots of information. And maybe try some new ways to be organized and set timelines for yourself.

      Good luck!

      1. I do the pomodoro and when I’m dialed in it works really well for me, I just have a huge problem starting it (and sometimes problems being focused for a whole 25 mins).

        I should mention adhd to my therapist – it’s pretty common in my family so would not be surprised…

    5. I suspect you’re just healing from burnout, and that can take some time. Does your exercise routine get your heart rate way up? That helps to release the long term fight or flight buildup that leads to burnout.

  13. I admire people who can say “no” in a positive way that still almost sounds like a yes. How can I develop this skill?

    I’ve come up through biglaw so I’ve learned how to say “yes but” to some extent. Now I’m struggling with client management. For example, I’ve inherited a difficult client who says some truly off the wall things. I have a co-counsel who is masterful at redirecting them in a way that isn’t – “no that’s completely wrong and let me explain why”. I think I tend to be a negative person anyway so this is a broader personality trait that I want to work on. How do you learn to put a positive spin on a no?

    1. Not a lawyer but I have students say bananas things to me all the time and I have to tell them they are wrong without crushing their spirit. I do a lot of “interesting, we might also consider…” “or another way to look at that is…”

    2. You should consider all options, and show that you are respecting their input and their question (even if you’re not really) Then just politely bring up the reasons that it doesn’t work. Even though its definitely an off-the-wall request approach it as “I thought about it and based on my past experience it won’t work, and here is something else we could do instead”. It can also be helpful to identify the underlying concern, whatever made them come up with this idea, and try to address that.

      Source: campaigns are nuts and people always have insane ideas

    3. “I think we can tweek that idea and turn it into this.” or “that’s a great place to start.”

      When it’s in my personal life, I’ll often say “that (your idea) isn’t going to work for me, but this something else does.”

    4. I am not a lawyer, but working with very creative higher ups that always have big ideas. When presented with something that I think won’t work out, I phrase all my criticism as questions. I don’t think we should do this at all = “Can you tell me more about how this fits into the bigger project?” I think this won’t work because xyz = “Do you have any concerns regarding xyz?”

    5. This is perhaps more of an in-house lawyer approach, but I’ve heard it described as, Say Yes, If…. And then the “if” is conditions they’ll never take on. Yes, you can absolutely take on that risk as long as you add X, Y and Z safeguards…which are too burdensome and THEY have to say no, not you.

  14. for those of you who have dealt with perfectionism at work, what worked best for you? I’m already in therapy for it.

    1. Can you provide more details around the issue? Is it that you don’t get things done on deadline/in a timely manner? Or that you are too focused on things that don’t really matter? Etc. This will help us provide tips.

      1. Not OP, so sorry to threadjack, but would be interested in tips on not being able to let go of things that don’t matter. For example, spending too much time rereading and editing emails before sending or on formatting a PPT. I now have a reputation with senior leaders for “making great PPTs” …which is great for exposure but not so great that that is my reputation vs my actual (semi-related) profession. In my year-end review my manager told me I “need to get more comfortable doing C-level work – not everything has to be an A.” But I don’t know how to turn it off.

        1. Ah ha! Perfect is the enemy of done.

          I focus on what creates risk and will coat us money and what doesn’t, what is a legal issue and what is not, and what is going out as an anon work product vs a reviewed by anon work product. If it increases risk substantively and will cost us money if it’s not fixed, is a legal issue, and is my work product? It gets fixed. If it’s not, I may suggest to the business they re-review for X but I don’t always and then I let it fly and nothing bad ever really happens. You may have to take baby steps on the let it go path, but once you do let things go and the world does not come crashing down around you, you’ll realize it’s just NBD that the grammar isn’t perfect in a letter that was drafted by someone else and doesn’t have your name on it. If the person signing it doesn’t care? Neither do I even though I think it’s embarrassing for the company. Customers don’t usually GAF IME. I see the crap they send us. No one cares.

          1. Adding I am a lawyer so your substantive is this an X may need to be adjusted. But also, if it’s someone else’s job and they suck at it, unless they are your employee and it legitimately affects your job, don’t fix it for them!

        2. What I feel helps here is to have a mechanism to keep bigger, high level goals on my radar (this could be somewhere literally on the wall behind your desk, or a monthly check in with your stretch goals or whatever), and to shift thinking into an opportunity cost mindset. That’s especially useful when you weigh straightforward tasks with a hard deadline against those side projects that are optional/no deadline but would add value or make you shine.
          I could spend 3 more hours to work out all the kinks in this slide deck, and maybe it’s a high level presentation so it’s a good use of my time. But maybe it’s not, and I could actually spend those three hours on something with long-term value.

    2. Realizing there’s no such thing, just your idea of it, which many people may not share; that it makes you the block in completing projects, hurts your performance and damages relationships with your colleagues. Once you stop seeing it as a positive and realize the harms, it’s easier to knock it off.

    3. The issue is I get everything done extremely well and am progressing super quickly and everything is going really well. Except for the fact that my lifestyle is terrible and doing the things I’m doing extremely well is taking away from my ability to spend more time doing other things I should be doing- for example, I’m a partner at a consulting firm and I spend a ton of time executing on work vs bringing in new business. It’s fine for now but at some point it’ll be a problem for me. It is also complicated by a talent crunch and things like that, but part of the problem is definitely me.

  15. Looking for recs for things to do in Sonoma in late May while I’m pregnant. I don’t mind going to some vineyards, but don’t want that to be the only things we do. We are renting a car.

  16. i went to the store to buy DH a valentine’s day car and saw cards for black history month. is this something you give someone a card for?

    1. Frankly, I’d rather acknowledge Black history month than Valentine’s day. One is meaningful and important the other is made up commercial garbage. But yea, capitalism will let you spend money for any and all reasons.

  17. Has anyone been reimbursed by health insurance for Covid tests? I’m oddly struggling on this

      1. Yeah that’s sort of where I land. Doesn’t seem worth the effort. You can easily buy them with HSA money, so that’s what I do. Technically it’s my money, since HSA accounts never expire, but it’s my employer making the contributions, so it eases the sting a bit.

    1. have not yet, but MyCigna has a form front and center on their site that looked very easy to fill and submit.

      (unfortunately the last tests I bought were *before* the awesome announcement. drats!)

    2. Submitted my claim online yesterday. It’s at least easier than when I have to send in an OON claim via mail. I have IBX (blue cross)

      1. FYI as another Philly IBX here – the process for ordering the free 8 tests (per month) online was super easy. No shipping charge either!

        1. Oh I’m the OP and I’m in Philly with IBX insurance. I’ll do this for next time!

    3. I submitted last week but have not yet received a response. The process was inconvenient but understandable.

    4. Priority Health made the process very finicky and annoying. Paper forms only (with wrong fields that they say must be filled in, because it is the Rx reimbursement form), submit through Express Scripts, must be mailed in with the receipt and UPC codes from the tests taped to the forms. Separate envelope for each submission form, only one submission form for each person. They say reimbursement will be 6-8 weeks after processing, and will come in the form of a paper check. Because clearly we live in 1980.

  18. My mom’s birthday is coming up and she has been questing for the perfect cake recipe. Please share your favorites! Just plain cake – either white or yellow. I’m thinking of trying to make her a white cake with blood orange curd and a white chocolate buttercream…but also want to give her a few new recipes to test out and add to her (extensive) spreadsheet.

    1. Bravetart’s recipes have been great for me so far. There are some posted on Serious Eats, but she also has a book which your mom might enjoy.

    2. King Arthur’s recipe of the year (I think it was 2019? Or 2018) was the perfect birthday cake.

    3. If I googled correctly, white or yellow cake is a plain sponge cake? With light texture and tastes very little on it’s own but a great vessel for icing and custards and curds? If so:

      Would recommend trying a Swedish Prinsesstårta (Princess cake), which is a simple sponge with jam and vanilla custard, a cream dome and marzipan lid. Mary Berry has an English version on the BBC website.

      1. PS forgot to add – in Swedish, a plain sponge is called a “sugar cake”. So I guess the US describes the color, the UK describes the texture, and the Swedes describe the taste. :D

    4. Hot Milk Cake from the Berkeley Plantation cook book (one of those “ladies auxiliary” support organizations). Wonderful, old school cake.

  19. Would love to hear from others who have lost a sizeable amount of weight and gotten plastic surgery to tighten things up afterwards. I have lost about 75 lbs over the last few years and am slowly working on the last 20 lbs or so. I’m almost 48, and a lifetime of being heavy and yo-yo dieting has left me with sagging skin. It’s most noticeable to me on my arms and inner thighs but a bit on my stomach too. My arms do not fit my frame at all. I can wear a medium/size 8 in jackets/tops, but regularly have to size up to something like a 12-14 for my arms to fit. I have maintained my current weight loss for a couple of years so I’m fairly certain anything that was going to bounce back would have done so by now. I have done all the things I know to try – lift weights 3-4 x per week, take collagen supplements, etc. I have now officially booked a consultation with a plastic surgeon for next month and I’m trying to figure out what questions I should ask, what I should be prepared for, etc. I think I’m looking at an arm lift, possible thigh lift, and maybe tummy tuck. Wondering about getting this done in phases versus all at once and what recovery time would be. Anyone want to weigh in with their experiences, recommendations?

  20. How long does it take to adjust to a new job? I’m in a brand new position and so far I am very unhappy. Part of it is a change in the environment and type of work, and part of it is that I am realizing I didn’t ask enough questions and ignored some pretty big red flags with the whole situation.

    I’m starting to think this was a mistake and am considering leaving after a short time and omitting this from my resume altogether. Prior to this I have a very stable employment history and have stayed at both of my previous full time jobs for 5+ years.

    I realize this whole situation is self-created as I made this jump pretty impulsively. And maybe things will still get better. But in the meantime, I’m struggling and I worry that people are going to pick up on how unhappy I am.

    1. So I am in the process of doing this. I reflected a lot to figure out what I didn’t like because I was new (and therefore would change) vs. what was the work and the company culture (Which would not). I started networking around and it was amazing how many people I admire said that something similar had happened to them once, and that you make a decision based on the best info available and sometimes it’s not what you thought. In my opinion, there is probably never going to be a better time to do a mulligan on this because of the Great Resignation, etc. so I would say start poking around and see what else you can do. For me, I’ve decided to move on and have a couple irons in the fire that hopefully will come together soon. I keep putting one foot in front of the other (it’s hard to motivate) but each day I take one step towards a different future. You are not alone!

  21. Has anybody taken any online creative writing classes they would recommend? This would be just for my own personal enrichment. I have this desire to write, but I’m not entirely sure what I want to write and I could use the structure that comes from some kind of class, whether it’s a week or two or a semester long.

    1. Yes! I’ve been taking them for over a year now and love it. Most of the classes I’ve taken have been with Gotham Writer’s Workshop— Creative Writing 101 (online only), Fiction I (Zoom), Novel Drafting (Zoom), Mystery Writing (online only), and now Novel Critique (Zoom). I also took an online only class with GrubStreet called 6 Stories in 6 Weeks that was a generative class.

      I prefer the Zoom classes because there’s a lot more interaction with the people in your class. The online only have been hit or miss because class participation varies, though I will say the instructors have been great in all of these and will provide feedback, no matter what the rest of the participation looks like. A group of folks from my Fiction I class still meets (a year later) and we critique each other’s work a few times a month.

      Out of all this, I was glad I started with Creative Writing 101 because it helped me just get into a regular habit of writing and gave me some space to explore what I was interested in. The Fiction I class was accepting of novel writing or short story writing, but it was a critique class where you actually submit work and the rest of the class discusses it. I love this and learn a TON from it, but I was glad I’d been able to submit to the instructor only in Creative Writing 101 instead of jumping right into that fire! I will say that I’ve never been in a class where the other people were rude at all— it’s all been quite constructive, no matter what level the writer is. I enjoyed my instructors at Gotham and at GrubStreet, so I think either of those options are great starting out. Gotham might be a little cheaper if that matters to you.

      Once you really get going, there are some great YouTubers to check out for free, too. My favorites are Alexa Donne and Shaelin Bishop (she has her own channel and also does content for Reedsy).

      1. If you’re still reading, big +1 to Gotham Writer’s Workshop. I did Creative Writing 101, Fiction I, and Sci Fi/Fantasy. They were really great. Fiction I and Sci Fi/Fantasy were workshop classes where you share excerpts with the class and I was SUPER nervous about it, but it ended up being one of my favorite parts of the course, getting feedback from others. Great program, and I highly recommend!

  22. Relevant information:
    – I was let go from my first associate job in June 2008. Spent a few months unemployed, a few months as a contractor at another large firm (it didn’t work out), a few months as a contractor through a legal staffing agency.
    – I accepted my current in-house job in June 2009. Currently senior management.

    I’m updating my resume for the first time in ages. I’m inclined to leave the year long gap and then explain it as needed during interviews. Feels less strange than putting in several short-stints that have no bearing on where i am now.

    Thoughts?

    1. I would leave out those two short jobs. That’s long enough ago that you could honestly put “2006-2008” and “2009-present” and it would look 100% normal.

    2. Given that it was the beginning of the recession, I think it would be fine to have a year gap on your resume. With that said, you could also combine your two contract attorney positions into one by listing it as “contract attorney” and then list both places under it. Over a decade later, I don’t think it matters either way.

    3. I think this is a non-issue – a year long gap from 14 years ago during the financial crisis is not going to raise any eyebrows whatsoever, especially considering you have been at your current place for 13 years.

      1. Cosign this. No reasonable person will care about this at all. If someone makes it a thing, take that as a red flag you may not want to work for those people.

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