ByElizabeth Hours Updated
Comments 261 Comments

Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Camille Shrunken Sweater Blazer

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I’ve said it before — the sweater blazer is the MVP of 2020–2021. I really like this slightly shrunken version from J.Crew for a more tailored, nipped-in look. It’s polished, but comfy — exactly what we’re looking for right now.

This would be a great option to have on hand if you’re slowly transitioning back into the office and not sure what the vibe is. It’s formal enough to pass for a blazer, but you won’t look totally out of place if people still look like they’re working from their dining room tables.

The heather sand color (pictured) looks super versatile, but I also love this striped version if you want something a little more fun.

The blazer is $110 at J.Crew (marked down from $158) and is available in sizes XXXS–3X. It also comes in ivory, navy, and black.

Sales of note for 3/26/25:

  • Nordstrom – 15% off beauty (ends 3/30) + Nordy Club members earn 3X the points!
  • Ann Taylor – Extra 50% off sale + additional 20% off + 30% off your purchase
  • Banana Republic Factory – Friends & Family Event: 50% off purchase + extra 20% off
  • Eloquii – 50% off select styles + extra 50% off all sale
  • J.Crew – 30% off tops, tees, dresses, accessories, sale styles + warm-weather styles
  • J.Crew Factory – Shorts under $30 + extra 60% off clearance + up to 60% off everything
  • M.M.LaFleur – 25% off travel favorites + use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – $64.50 spring cardigans + BOGO 50% off everything else

Sales of note for 3/26/25:

  • Nordstrom – 15% off beauty (ends 3/30) + Nordy Club members earn 3X the points!
  • Ann Taylor – Extra 50% off sale + additional 20% off + 30% off your purchase
  • Banana Republic Factory – Friends & Family Event: 50% off purchase + extra 20% off
  • Eloquii – 50% off select styles + extra 50% off all sale
  • J.Crew – 30% off tops, tees, dresses, accessories, sale styles + warm-weather styles
  • J.Crew Factory – Shorts under $30 + extra 60% off clearance + up to 60% off everything
  • M.M.LaFleur – 25% off travel favorites + use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – $64.50 spring cardigans + BOGO 50% off everything else

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

261 Comments

  1. Can anyone recommend a real estate agent in Boston? We are first-time buyers looking to buy an apartment or condo.

    Or, does anyone have general tips on finding an agent to work with?

    1. Look at recently sold places in the areas you’re looking and see if there’s an agency that represented a large chunk of them. In my neighborhood, there’s a Realtor that sells most of the houses, and I would choose her because she’s most likely to get the inside scoop on things pre-listing.

      1. If you’re looking at a specific neighborhood – see if they have a FB group. There are a couple realtors who are really active in my (suddenly highly desirable) neighborhood group.

    3. Mian LaVallee of the Wilson Group. have worked with her, referred friends to her. She’s a bada$$ mom, woman, and real estate professional.

    4. Also in Boston looking for recs, preferably for Dorchester or Roslindale area agents. I had to let my real estate agent go last week after she said some inappropriate comments about neighborhood residents.

    5. Boston is very neighborhood-specific. Highly recommend Presidential Properties if you’re looking in Beacon Hill. They do rentals and sales, and the broker-owner there is truly top notch.

      If you’re in Quincy/South Shore, recommend Norell Veal: linkedin.com/in/norell-veal

    1. That’s like a lot of area. Someone in Myrtle Beach isn’t also going to have a good read on Folly Beach or Hilton Head.

  3. I just got the athleta Cabo shorts after the glowing reviews here. I love them! Problem is, I got the white and they seem see-thru to me. Is that just the style?

    It doesn’t seem like my underwear is visible but the pockets are clearly showing through.

    Also, the other colors are sold out in my size (10). Recs on where to look for secondhand? They fit perfectly.

    1. Definitely try Poshmark – quick search shows tons of both Cabo shorts and pants.

    2. In my experience, pockets always show through white linen — I don’t personally like the look so I avoid white.

    3. You might want to call your local store to see if they can get them. I think the stock for the stores is separate from online.

  4. I didn’t think we will be ready to travel and did not make any plans for Memorial Day :( Any suggestions. DINK living in Boston, would prefer somewhere we can drive at this point and accommodations are not crazy expensive. Might even consider day trips although it seems we can expect every where to be super crowded given the weather and vaccines.

    1. Newburyport is always a good option.
      Maine Coast is also great.
      I’m sure you can find some cute Airbnbs.

    4. Since you live so close by, you have probably already been there, but on the off chance no, Gloucester/Rockport is such an easy day trip or if you like to hike, the Berkshires (Mt. Greylock). Other drivable options would be Portsmouth, NH, White Mountains area of NH, Coastal CT or CT wine trail, RI beaches, Burlington, VT. That being said, it will probably be hit or miss if you can find accommodations on further destinations if you are going to stay overnight.

    5. I would do a day trip or overnight in Marblehead with a walking tour of historic homes in Salem added.

    6. What about Brattleboro or Windsor VT? The downtown in Brattleboro is adorable, lots of great food/hikes in the area, and Windsor has the really lovely sculpture gardens/shops. Woodstock/Queechee (sp?) VT are great too as is Stowe. Coastal CT (Saybrook or Essex would be my picks) or Kent CT are also lovely.
      Can you tell we did a LOT of day-trip drives and outdoor hikes during lockdown….

    7. Come down to Philly if that’s not too long a drive. The usual tourist locations are just starting to get lines again and outdoor dining abounds :) Plenty of Airbnbs in the city.

    9. NYC! Lots of locals will be leaving the city for the weekend. Tons of outdoor dining and outdoor activities (NY/Brooklyn Botanical Gardens, baseball games, etc.) and museums are now reopening if you’re comfortable with indoor activities. The city has been feeling extra vibrant this spring as everyone comes out of hibernation.

      1. I suggested Rhode Island above, but I was actually coming back here to add in NYC as an option too. It is a great time to visit!

  5. Are there any pants with fabric similar to the Eileen Fisher washable crepe pants that cost less, ideally around $50? Bonus points for having pockets and various leg widths/lengths.

    2. A little different fabric but lightweight and extremely comfortable are the athleta skyline two pants. I have two pairs and have been pretty much living in them.

      1. Ooo, thanks for that! not the OP, but that looks like what I’m looking for. If you don’t mind, how tall are you and which length do you order? I’m sort of on the cusp of regular and petite.

        2. I have these pants. I LOVE these pants. I’m 5’8 and they’re cropped on me.

    3. Check out the Eddie Bauer Departure pants. I don’t think they read as dressy as the EF – more of a technical/travel material – but I wear them to work.

      1. They’re probably as good as the EF these days. I used to be on here singing the praise of the EF stretch crepe pants, but the quality has gone down so far that I think they read as athleisure these days. The waistband used to be wide, and the fabric used to be quite thick, did not attract and hold lint, and did not fade even after years’ of being run through the washer and dryer. None of those are true any more. For better than a decade they were the workhorse of my work days in the office and nice casual wardrobe. I wrote the company about my disappointment with the current quality and my willingness to pay substantially more for them if the quality were to come back, and received a short and dismissive reply.

        1. Huh, I’m sorry to hear they’ve changed them. I have six pairs that are all over two years old and they’re great. I guess I will hang onto them forever. They certainly seem like they’ll last forever

        2. I have a problem sometimes knowing which are the ones I like. They’ve started making some that are sort of like the crepe ones and at the same price point but they’re not, and it’s super annoying. I also noticed the t-shirt dresses aren’t made from the same nice thick fabric that they used to be.

    4. Eileen Fisher ReNew is a retail store that sells gently worn and/or refurbished, professionally cleaned Eileen Fisher clothes. There’s one in Seattle that is good, and there is an online store.

    5. I have seen similar pants on Uniqlo’s website but haven’t bought them yet. I fully agree with everyone about Eileen Fisher quality declining, sadly.

  6. Has anyone tried the Purito BB Cream? I just purchased this after watching some YT videos about it, but realized that in my haste, I didn’t notice the problematic ingredients for acne prone skin on the label. Has anyone here had a problem w/breakouts when using this product? Any tips for applying or improving the shine or wear time? I really like the formula, spreadability (it is truly like a moisturizer with decent coverage), and color for me, but have not worn it out yet.

    1. I tried a sample of it. I didn’t break out but I wasn’t impressed with it. It didn’t lay nicely on my skin compared to the Dr Jart Bb cream I love.

  7. Hi- any suggestions for family friendly places to go car camping within an hour or two of Newark, NJ? We are driving up from DC to meet family. Ideally somewhere with good hiking trails, and near water for the kids to go wading.

      1. Yes — my family lives in the area; can confirm. BOLO for bears now (or plan for bear-proofing your camp site).

    4. Dingman’s Campground in the Delaware Water Gap. Great hiking with waterfalls. Second would be Stokes State Forest. It is a crowded campground, but Spruce Run Reservoir is a straight shot out 78 and it has a beach.

    5. I have a comment in moderation with reasons, but my top three places would be:
      1. Delaware Water Gap
      2. Stokes
      3. Spruce Run (there is a beach)

  8. Question for the lawyers – how do you turn off the lawyer part of your mind when you’re dealing with a business as a private citizen? I’m not a lawyer, but I spend a lot of time at work negotiating contracts with suppliers and vendors.

    I want to enroll my puppy in kindergarten, but the trainer’s indemnification language is problematic to me – they put the entire liability for anything my dog or I do on me. I doubt they’ll negotiate it with me, and training classes are hard to get these days – I’m on a few wait lists, and classes book up as soon as they’re posted.

    Do you just say “Well, most people are reasonable and won’t sue for $1 million over a dog bite” and sign the waiver? Things could get ugly in a dog-training class if the trainer doesn’t have good command.

    1. Don’t you take your puppy out on walks already? Do you have umbrella liability insurance?

      1. Yes and yes, but walks aren’t the same as training classes. The classes provide socialization for him, and corrections for me if I’m teaching him the wrong things or in wrong ways.

        1. But the puppy is already exposed to other people and dogs outside of class and you are not worried about that.

        2. That’s why you have your umbrella insurance policy. If you want to take the class, you’ll have to sign the waiver.

    2. 1. add a small handwritten carveout for the trainer’s gross negligence or willful misconduct and see what happens, or
      2. hold breath and see what happens, with the risk mitigated by the fact that puppy damages are probably capped at something reasonable and are you really going to be able to point the finger at the trainer, who may be judgment proof

      1. I thought no one could make you waive their liability for gross negligence or willful misconduct, ie even if you sign something saying so, it’s meaningless.

    3. I am a lawyer and in my experience, those who quibble over form contracts and stuff are the same types who insisted on being the first to answer every question in law school classes regardless of whether they were right. I.e. the insufferable ones

        1. 100% yes. Lawyer, married to a lawyer. I have never interlined a form personal services contract and would laugh at anyone who did.

          1. I will say that the only time I felt the need to do it was on a hospital admittance form that was shockingly one-sided. I just crossed out the objectionable parts and no one said anything (I was in labor after my water broke with delivery #1 and would have pittied the fool who wanted to push back on that).

          3. The only time I did it was to remove consent to publish photos from the contract with our wedding photographer – because i’m a prosecutor and it was a safety risk.

      2. That’s both a harsh and ignorant response. The point of evenhanded contractual language is that it encourages both parties to be reasonable in case something goes wrong. The suggestion of a carve-out for gross negligence or willful misconduct is smart.

        1. Yeah, this is completely harsh, untrue, and unnecessary. Such a mean girl thing to post. OP, I would try to find a different trainer and compare the language.

          1. Yeah. And you’d probably make a point to write or call to explain that you’ve chosen to go elsewhere based on your dissatisfaction with the release language, too.

          2. Enough of the mean girling. Say something productive (e.g., umbrella insurance, push back on the one onerous term, etc.) or scroll on by.

    4. If contract language is truly crazy, I will cross it out. I’ve never had a small business object – usually they don’t even know what it says. For most things, I just sign. I am primarily a commercial litigator, so fighting over contract language and then settling is normal for me.

      1. I am finding that these contracts and waivers are increasingly being presented on line in a format that does not allow editing.

        I generally don’t participate in activities where I’m not comfortable assuming 100% of the risk, no matter what the contract says. If I were that worried that my puppy would bite someone, I’d book a private training session and ask the trainer to avoid contact with the dog.

        1. I’m not a lawyer, but read a book called “Boilerplate” by a contract law scholar about this. It’s sort of scary. Increasingly, contracts and waivers are intended not to be read and may not even be possible to read (she’s talking about things like smartphone terms of service) and everyone is expected to agree uncritically. There was an example of a family whose child died on a cruise who were prevented from suing due to one of those arbitration clauses, IIRC.

          I see the impulse to make fun, but this is an issue and we’re sort of stuck.

          1. Yeah, it’s shocking to me that people want to jump on this as some kind of Karen situation when anyone with any critical thinking ability can consider the serious ramifications of a “just sign, don’t ask questions” approach to contracts.

          4. Anonymous at 11:40, there are attorneys on this board saying that it’s fine to throw in a one-phrase redline. Your nastiness is bizarre.

          5. Anon at 11:40, what an unkind and uncalled for remark to Monday. Monday, I am a lawyer and I appreciate your comment and might look into the book.

    5. That specific example actually seems fairly reasonable to me. Anything you or your dog does should be on you. It’s your dog.

      What I struggle with are the release / waiver language in things like rock climbing gyms, amusement parks, etc where my safety or my kid’s is dependent on someone else’s actions and I think if there is gross negligence / misconduct they should be liable.

      I normally just cringe and sign though tbh. If it’s a dealbreaker I may scratch it out.

      There was a case in Canada a couple years ago where a lawyer was held to a higher standard on those waivers because she was deemed to have read & understood it. Think it was a zip line in BC that crashed & the court said that b/c she was a lawyer she knew what the release / waiver language meant and it was binding. That always sticks in my mind at these things.

      1. (This was 100 years ago and I don’t practice in an area anywhere related to this sort of thing, but) I seem to recall my Torts professor saying that you can’t waive gross negligence. I remember him telling a story about how his wife always wants him to read all of the fine-print type stuff, and he basically just says “Eh, just sign it.” Am I misremembering this?

        2. Nope, you are 100% correct, I stand by the earlier comment just sign the dang thing. An OP, it’s your dog, you’re responsible for him/her.

        3. In my state, you cannot waive liability in tort at all, though you can indemnify someone else, even in cases of the indemnified party’s gross negligence.

        4. You cannot. In my state a lot of these boilerplate waivers would be unenforceable, so I just sign.

        6. Depends on the jurisdiction. In one of the states where I litigate frequently, there are no degrees of negligence and a waiver would be 100% effective.

    6. I don’t think it’s worth bringing up, honestly. The only time I’ve ever marked up a contract in my personal life as a transactional lawyer was a requirement in a venue rental contract that I get a 5M umbrella policy for the event (which wasn’t even possible to do). I don’t think you’ll win, and it may get you kicked out. I’d take a look at my insurance coverage and see if you’re covered there.

    7. I refused to do business with a solar panel company that had an insanely one sided contract. They wouldn’t negotiate it so we said no solar panels for us or solar panels from a different company. It had things like us waiving counterclaims and waiving their obligation to mitigate damages among other things.

    8. My dog adoption form, which I signed, was completely unenforceable in my state. I adopted my girl from an out of state rescue, which is super common. These out of state nonprofits drive dogs here on trucks from kill shelters in the South. The form said the dog is their property and I cannot give her away, sell her, etc.-basically that I must return her to them at any time, and that they can take her back at any time. I just signed it and chuckled. Since then, I’ve moved 3xs and had no contact with the shelter. They never checked up on her and have no idea where we even live.

      1. They don’t need to know where you moved. They do that because if the dog is found in bad shape in a shelter or picked up by police in a neglect situation, they’ll want it back so they can give it a better shot at not being put down. The microchip tells them all they need to know about who hold right over property. Those forms can actually be very important to an animal’s life.

        1. That assumes the rescue microchips the animal. When I adopted my cat, the contract had that term but he wasn’t microchipped. I had him microchipped at my vet, but it doesn’t trace back to the rescue at all.

      2. They’re not going to try to steal your dog back from you in the middle of the night, that’s so they can try to re-rescue an animal that has gone to a clearly bad home.

        1. How do you think they get possession in a hoarding situation or when it’s picked up by the shelter and been abused? Seriously the stupidity here.

    9. I think a lot of lawyers care about stuff like this for about the first 18 months after graduation (or worse yet, in law school). Then you are more than happy to leave your day job behind in your personal life and only read what you sign for really important things.

    10. I’m not sure I’ve ever try to revise a contract (maybe once), but I did have this fun conversation with a landlord (giant impersonal company) once: Landlord, mid-lease: “We need you to sign this new lease addendum about the deck.” Me (reads, has horribly one-sided indemnification/liability language) “No thanks.” Landlord: “But you have to, it’s part of the lease.” Me: “No it’s not, the lease was signed months ago, and you’re not offering me anything to sign this, so I don’t think I will.” LL: “But you have to!” Me: “No, I don’t. I already have a valid lease. Go ask your lawyer, they’ll tell you the same thing.” Presumably they did, because I never heard anything else.

    11. I understand where you’re coming from. I just had a dentist buy my old dentist’s practice, and he tried to sneak a liability release for all future liability (ALL!) into a Covid release. No sir.

      Found a different dentist.

      People think things like this don’t matter, but…sometimes they do, and I feel more comfortable not signing my rights away.

      If that makes me an insufferable gunner, I’m OK with that label.

      Re the dog example–I wouldn’t redline that, and I think most place will have similar release language, at least IME.

      1. Eh, you have to weigh the likelihood of harm, the magnitude of the likely harm, and what would actually happen if the harm occurred (injured party’s health insurer pursuing a subrogation claim, dog owner’s umbrella insurance covering the claim, crazy injured party suing for millions of dollars, settlement on such a claim, etc.). I would personally be far more concerned about a blanket waiver of all liability against a dentist than the puppy kindergarten indemnification clause described above. But that’s just me.

        1. Right! I would never waive my right to sue a healthcare provider. They have professional liability insurance for that! I also worry about a provider’s confidence in their own skills if they want me to promise not to sue them. (The clause wouldn’t be enforceable in my state anyways.)

    12. What I worry about with this type of waiver, more so when I’m the party likely to be injured, is state law regarding subrogation of health insurance claims that may give health care providers the right to bill at rates far higher than the rates they negotiate with health insurers.

  9. Elizabeth, the blazer is cute for people that have survived the pandemic w/o putting on to many pounds. I will investigate at local shop and get back to you with an update. Also, we have all been vaccinated now, except for Rosa’s kids, and no one had much of a reaction to the shots. We all got the Fizer vaccine (2 shots) and I only felt sick the afternoon after the second shot with a fever. A lot better then getting the virus!

    Im back in the office full time and trying to make up for lost time. I hope to be able to start in person depos soon, but that is dependent on the others being vaccinated b/c I do NOT want them masked where I can’t see their faces, b/c they could be lying and I can only see their eyes.

    I went to Whole Foods yesterday and picked up a seasoned Steak that I reheated when I got home. Yummy! I recommend it to the entire hive! YAY!

    Finally, I am wondering if anyone in the hive has started dating again and how do they ensure the guy is vaccinated?

  10. Wow, I am sick of EVERYTHING in my closet. I put seasonal clothes in boxes so it feels like I am shopping out of my closet seasonally … now realizing how much of my wardrobe is business formal. I am taking out summer stuff I have barely worn in 2 years and excited about literally none of it. I have disposable income but would rather not much on clothes – any ideas to get out of this funk? My office is almost 100% business casual for the summer and I don’t want to wear a sheath dress every day. I rarely accessorize – neutral flats, tan watch, silver ring, silver studs.

    1. Seems as though your options are to buy more clothes or wear the ones you have.

      You could create a summer capsule wardrobe building on basics you already own and add a few new more casual pieces.

        1. Is there anything like the Vivienne files, but with a less preppy set of brands? I like her ideas but am not likely to buy an LL Bean sweater.

          1. I’m the Anon who recommended her, and I’m following for responses. I don’t actually take her ideas literally – I see it more as “I need a tshirt that has the same color base as that sweater.” or “I need a button-down substitute that will work under a cardigan” or whatever. But yes it’d be nice to have actual recommendations I could click on.

    2. So, I am thinking about hiring one of the fashionable wardrobe stylist people in my city to come by and help me shop / style my closet. At worst, it will be comically amusing and be a waste of $. OTOH, maybe I need a service like this more than another item. [OTOH — I have lots of hands — the stylist won’t be able to do a thing about the 50% of items that I’m just a COVID-15 away from fitting into again.]

      1. I did this and it was great. She was able to help me put things together that I never would have thought to combine. She also gave me a shopping list with links, took photos, and helped me purge. It was worth it.

    3. Eh, I’d give it a month of wearing it and then see, it might surprise you on. You can always add in 3 or 4 pieces you’re really excited about, but no need to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

    4. I bought washable jersey dresses from Brooks Brothers and Talbots in office appropriate patterns. They were not expensive, and add a dose of pattern to the mix.

    5. Accessories are an easy way to make neutral clothes interesting. I am going to buy locally made statement earrings to go with my all-neutral wardrobe.

      I also went on a thrift store quest to find a jumpsuit. No jumpsuit, but I picked up a few very flattering dresses to wear this summer.

    6. I’ve been doing a lot of Poshmark and Thredup because I just want something new/variety. Funky blouses, blazers, dresses. It’s not a huge amount of money and it brings me a little joy.

  12. Help me treat myself! I received a gift of $500 for my 40th birthday and want to be thoughtful on how I spend this. Some background:

    – Full time working mom of 3 young kids living in a suburban area.
    – Part time grad student (I’ll finish my program this December).
    – I love to cook and would typically buy myself a new Le Creuset pot but just did that at Christmas. I have most of the standard small appliances already (Instant Pot, air fryer, etc.).
    – Other hobbies: reading, hanging with friends, yoga, Peloton workouts.
    – I already own AirPods, several pair of Rothys, yoga blocks/strap/blanket/mat, and Ugg slippers. I recently upgraded my workout gear wardrobe.

    I’m at a loss…but I really want this to be for ME (not something for my house or family). In a perfect world I’d buy myself a Bario Neal cluster ring but that would require a budget extension. Help!

    1. If jewelry is what appeals, then I’d pursue that path. I’ve had such good luck with jewelry on Etsy, and there seem to be a number of similar styles to the ring you reference – maybe see if one suits you at your price point?

    3. save it and wait until there is something you want. buying for the sake of buying seems silly to me. i’m sure at some point there will be something you really want. alternatively – spa day?
      also – you are supermom. i only have 2 kids, work less than full time and am not in grad school and not sure i could do what you are doing

    4. What about a Bario Neal Custer Ring style ring from Etsy? Rent a limo for a day-long wine tour with friends? Cooking class (at home, in-person or virtual) with friends?

    9. I’d take a look at a local jeweler who has an estate case, or peruse the RealReal, you’d be shocked at how poorly a lot of jewelry holds it’s value, especially ‘demi-fine’. It is one of the reasons I just don’t understand paying over $200 for things like Mejuri – those delicate little pieces have so little metal or the stones are so small that you can find something comparable on Etsy or secondhand for much cheaper or better quality.

      1. +1, my husband loves doing this because (a) I like vintage style pieces anyway, and (b) estate stones are way, way, way less expensive than buying “new.”

        1. Curious – do you have any online estate sale recommendations in addition to the RealReal? We currently live in a rural area with limited local jewelers. TIA!

    10. What about splurging on a one-day yoga retreat (ie something like Kripalu in the Berkshires if you are near that area) or a fencing cooking class or series of classes for yourself?

    11. Is there something you could spend the money on that would make your life easier between now and when you graduate? A babysitter for a date night? Someone to clean your house more often? etc. You have a lot on your plate!

    14. Spend 50 dollars and something fun and frivolous (super expensive spices? really good vanilla?) and save the rest for the ring you really want.

  13. I think it’s time to get my head out of the sand and educate myself on the history of Israel and Palestine so that I can have a deeper understanding of the coverage of the current situation. Does anyone have a book to recommend that’s neutral?

    1. IDK — a lot of stuff out there seems very, very one-sided (like Palestine =/= Hamas, the West Bank of the Jordan River =/= the Gaza Strip). Anything that discusses how the Arab States deal with Palestine might be helpful, ditto anything that mentions how Iran funds terrorism. Hamas is a terrorist organization. Israeli citizens include Palestinians ( = “Israeli Arabs”). I am pretty surprised that the AP was operating out of the same building as Hamas, to the point of it being reckless to know and not tell that to AP employees (and there is knowing and “knowing” and IDK how you don’t know that; I get that they don’t have badges saying “Hamas”, but still).

    3. I don’t think anything on the subject is truly neutral, it’s best just to go in with that mindset. Karen Armstrong’s book Jerusalem might be a good starting point – she has a unique point of view and writes very accessibly. As a very left-wing Israeli American I find Tom Segev, Akiva Eldar, and Gershom Gorenberg’s writing to be fairly sober. I also read +972 Magazine (online only) but it might be overwhelming if you are just starting out.

    4. I took a course in college with a Jewish religious history professor on the history of violence in all three Abrahmic religions, and I liked:
      -Six Days of War written Oren (I think the old US ambassador to Israel) for historical context (the 1967 war)
      -Arabs and Israelis by Aly (and two others, one Palestinian, one Egyptian and one Israeli ) for broader framework

      I don’t know if you can neutral books about anything, but I found these to be balanced (as a left-wing part Jewish person with no personal ties to Israel, FWIW).

      1. Replying to myself to note that it’s actually an earlier article that predated Arabs and Israelis that I read in college, but they wrote the book together more recently.

    5. I think there are real criticisms and harsh criticisms to be made about Israel/Netanyahu. My problem with the dominant narrative is that it is so over the top and one sided that it bleeds into antisemitism. (Example Corbyn in the UK tolerating his members making really ugly anti-semitic comments or Ilhan Omar’s many antisemitic tweets about jews which were not strongly rebuked, or frankly the whole BDI movement). There is no parallel level of outrage about the treatment of Uighars by China or Saudi Arabia’s treatment of basically any group for example and not much critical thinking about Hamas/their ties to Iran/terrorism/indiscriminate rock fire into israel/their purposefully location their installations on schools/in the middle of neighborhoods/etc.

      An imperfect illustration is that there are very real criticisms of Shaun King as one of the prominent members of the BLM movement. But if you get over the top and start forming anti-Shaun King/BLM groups to the exclusion of criticism on other similar issues (like white supremacy) it starts feeling racist really quickly.

      1. Totally agree on a lot of this. The tunnel situation is horrifying. I know that we have drug-smuggling tunnels under the border with Mexico that we are always finding. I cannot imagine living in San Diego if those tunnels were used for terrorism / attacks on civilians and how the world would react if we acted pre-emptively against a threat like that.

        Honestly, I feel like there is a lot of qui bono that isn’t being asked but should be (looking at you, Iran).

      2. Yeah, when the NBA plays in China but can’t criticize it, I am grateful that my employer wouldn’t similarly muzzle me.

      3. The toleration of anti-Semitism on the left has bothered me so much. I’ve always voted Democrat/progressive, but II might be forced not to vote at all in the future because I find it so, so ugly and hypocritical. It really worries me.

      4. Also, to remind everyone – the holocaust only ended 75 years ago. There are still two million fewer jews alive today than there were in 1939. There are basically no jews left in Europe.

    6. agree that there isn’t really anything that is truly neutral and it might take more than one book bc i think it is important to understand the time period around when Israel was first created and

    7. See if you can find anything written by Shai Feldman. I took his class at Brandeis on Conflict and Peacemaking in the Middle East and it was incredible. He gave me the framework to understand the “narratives” (as he called them) competing for dominance in Israel and Palestine and was just an incredible professor. If he’s published anything lately, it’s guaranteed to be good.

      1. Actually, just Googled him for you and this book sounds perfect: “His most recent book (with Abdel Monem Said Aly and Khalil Shikaki), Arabs and Israelis: Conflict and Peacemaking in the Middle East, was published by Palgrave Macmillan in December 2013. To date it is the only textbook on the history of the conflict to have been co-authored by an Israeli, a Palestinian, and an Egyptian.”https://cbisd.org/programs/bagel-breakfast-with-professor-shai-feldman-president-of-sapir-college/

        Khalil Shikaki did 5-6 guest lectures in the class and was really incredible. Between him and Dr. Feldman, you’ll get a great overview.

      2. He is one of the co-authors of a book that was recommended by Cornellian above — this looks basically perfect for my purposes. Thanks everyone!

    8. I took a middle eastern history class in college and one of our textbooks was A history of the modern Middle East by Cleveland and Bunton. IIRC, the coverage of the history of Israel and previous wars etc was fairly neutral. Admittedly I did not read every page, but the excerpts required for class were good.

    9. I really appreciate this thread. I’m a lapsed Catholic who grew up in an area where many, many of my friends descended from Holocaust survivors. I’ve visited both Israel and Jordan (half of Jordan’s population is Palestinian) in quick succession. My feelings on the topic are so complicated and uninformed and I’m grateful for the opportunity to get past tweets to understand better.

    10. If you want to get a wider historical context for the whole region, and the background further back, try The Arabs: A History”by Eugene Rogan. This starts centuries back, and you get a good grasp of how troubled the whole region has been for long, and how important European imperialism and colonialism was in forging this situation.

  14. Not something I can really brag about in the real world but I’ve been basically managing up my bosses into being more organized and collegial in client meetings – think technical team who now has to work more with clients. Basic things like agendas, weekly internal meetings (I know those are controversial but in this context we need them), being more transparent and clear about what work has to be done and who has to do it.
    They’re my bosses and they don’t necessarily have to listen to me but I’m glad I did. I think part of what convinced them is me doing all these things and the clients loving it, and also me encouraging this in a firm but polite way.

  15. I’m a new manager at the level where I need a headshot (yay!), but I need some direction about professional headshots. I don’t wear makeup at all and my hair is usually up/back – it’s wavy/messy and mid-back length. It’s not cut in any style.

    Do I get professional hair and makeup (“natural makeup”) for the headshot day? What do I … ask for? I’m concerned about not looking like myself, but I also recognize that ‘natural makeup’ can read like ‘no makeup’ on camera, which is a good thing.

    1. Are you getting a headshot done at your employer? If so, I suspect they’ll have someone on hand to add make-up. I think they’ll probably take care of imperfections in your skin via photoshop, but it is probably worth considering letting them put some mascara and lip color on.

      I think the hair might be the bigger question… i’d ask for a blowout and make clear it’s for a headshot and you just want to look polished, not dramatic.

      1. I’ve had headshots done at work and by no means was there anyone around to help with grooming. Just a photographer that had you do an array of poses.

        I think for the makeup, you could make an appt at Sephora and tell them exactly what you did here.

        For hair, could you go to your regular stylist that morning for a cut so that it’s styled nicely too?

        1. Oh, interesting! I’ve had this done three times (two times in private practice in NYC and once now as a government employee in Texas) and there has always been a make up person. But they also bunched appointments so they’d have the 9 most recent new employees on the same day, and with COVID i assume they won’t be doing that…

        2. My employer didn’t even have a professional photographer, just a random employee with a camera.

          3. My DMV photo is 100% better than my headshot. I think I will just pay fit my own.

      2. I would only expect to have somebody on hand for make up if I were a movie star. I don’t think a normal company is going to provide that.

    2. You don’t need to wear make-up. If you don’t wear it now, don’t start. Just get a nice haircut, make sure your skin looks clean and fresh, and you’ll look professional. Full disclosure, I don’t wear make-up and am a firm believer that I do not owe anyone the prettiest version of myself. My face is my face, rosacea and sunspots and all, and it’s professional to show it as it is.

      1. I agree with hiring someone to do this. You will be so much happier with the photo, and it will be what is out there in the business world for a long time.

    4. My coworker took mine on her iphone 12 max pro or something and it’s the best headshot I’ve ever had. Do you have anyone you trust to just take a bunch?

    5. I would arrange for hair and makeup, just ask for natural looks. Otherwise, this will look unpolished.

    6. I think you shouldn’t stray far from how you normally look. With filters and editing, you really don’t need makeup. I think it is more important to talk to the photographer (eg, admit you’re nervous, or that your right side is your best side), and ask to see some shots mid-session so you can point out what you like and don’t like. Don’t wait until they are done and email you a couple options a week later!

  16. Tips for improving intimacy in a relationship?

    DH and I have a great relationship and have only improved it in a lot of ways during Covid (we have loved being together every day – he used to travel every week for work). But we don’t garden often, and it is becoming a bigger and bigger issue. Pre covid we were at once every month or two, and now it’s down to 4-5 times a year? This is not what I want but it feels like a downward spiral – there is so much pressure for it to be “good” and to perform when we do. It is good and fun but it also just seems hard to get started and often an initiation by one of us fizzles out into silliness.

    Is this something we should just start scheduling? Anything we could do to take steps to lessen the pressure but also be sure that we actually go through with gardening instead of dissolving into cuddles and laughing?

    1. You don’t mention what DH wants. Have you talked to him about whether he is happy with the current frequency?

      1. We’ve talked about it and neither of us are happy w the frequency but we seem a little stuck.

    2. We just kind of had to talk about it and commit to it. Now even with hurdles we tend to push through.

    3. Why is it “dissolving into cuddles and laughing?” Is this mutual and enjoyable, or is it a situation wherein one partner is tickling the other to deliberately change the mood?

      1. +a million. It sounds to me like he’s not actually interested and using that to push away.

      2. Just an example but it’s an inability on one side to take it seriously and I think a light rejection to avoid performance anxiety. It’s usually mutual.

    4. Where’s the pressure coming from? Where’s the silliness coming from – is it nerves? Is it an attempt by one partner to let the other down easy?

    5. Just so you know you aren’t alone. I’m in the same boat. I think the pressure comes from waiting so long in between that its like, well now that we’re finally doing it, it needs to be good. In my situation, I would do it every day if possible and my H just seems fine with a handful of times a year. But I am starting to think more and more it is a physical issue for H, who is just avoiding dealing with it because he doesn’t want to go to a doctor though we’ve talked ad naseum about going to the doctor, have been to counseling, etc. Consider that it could be a physical issue?

    6. Have you tried having a couple glasses of wine…or other relaxing substances? That could help with nervousness. But I’m also wondering *why* there is nervousness, if you are married. It is definitely worth having a conversation about, perhaps with the help of a therapist.

      1. +1 other relaxing substances, if they’re available in your state. Game changer for us.

      2. IME, weed has been kind of amazing; it both relaxes inhibitions and increases general sensitivity. (It has not been what I would call a game-changer, but it has made for some mind-blowing sessions for us, late middle-aged people.)

        1. To anons @ 1:08 and @ 1:28 can you be more specific about which substances work for you? I’ve never consumed, but have been wanting to try and this may push me over the edge into doing so.

          1. Edible mar1juana chocolates. I’m in CO, which was early to recreational legalization, and they even have some products that are specifically supposed to help enhance sensation. Check out ‘Love’ chocolates by the company 1906 if you’re ever in the state

          2. A friendly reminder that it takes about an hour for edible weed to kick in and hat also is affected by whether you ate recently. It’s easy to over-consume if you don’t know that. I’ve heard too many stories from people I know who wait for a few minutes and think it must have been a weak batch so they have another, and an hour later realize they took too much and feel miserable. I imagine this will affect your planning the timing of being intimate.

          3. I’m the anon at 1:08 and 2:15 – I’d second this advice. I usually take 1/2 to 1/4 of the recommended dose (~2.5mg)

          4. For me, it was edibles and vaping MJ. We have medical cards here in FL. I do edibles more often as I don’t think vaping is all that healthy. It has definitely added a whole other level in our gardening life. As someone else said there is increased sensitivity and it helps me relax and feel less inhibited. I take about 5 mg when I’m doing edibles. There are fast-acting edibles that kick in after about 10-15 minutes, and those are my favorite.

    7. I think you might be nervous in part because when it becomes so rare it is a THING and it becomes more fraught. So with that in mind, I would just start trying to do it more often and resolve to having mediocre to bad sex. Assume it will be bad at first. Just set your expectations really low to take the pressure off. We did this to some extent when we were TTC in the midst of a low-point in our collective libido and wanted to garden every other day. So when you start laughing, you don’t have to stop, keep going. If he can’t get it up, you can still get off. Use tools if you aren’t already!

      Other thoughts – when my husband is mildly depressed (often related to how his job is going or something else that has little to do with me), it kills his libido. My desire is somewhat reactive, so it is a vicious circle for me. Cuddling with him often awakens desire in me.

      If there is any deep dark desire you or he has never explored together, bringing that into the relationship can make a big difference. For us this was using the, um, back door sometimes.

    8. I just wanted to thank you for asking this question. Same situation with my husband. Lots of love, but little happening in the bedroom. (It also doesn’t help that our preschooler is at home with us all the time, thanks to Covid.)
      You are not alone.

    9. Super Anon, there are books/articles for people with this problem and one of the things experts say to do is to take turns giving sensual massages and cuddling and other makeout type activities without ever going all the way, by design. So agree ahead of time that neither will climax and no penetration. Basically, reacquaint yourselves to each other, to sensuality and to take away the performance pressure by agreeing not to climax/complete the act. You can structure it so that after a few sessions you go further and further. Or build on the intimacy in graduated ways. You could do an online search for how to restart your sx life with massage or similar and look for articles or library ebooks.

  17. I’ve never really known how to do my make up, but I would like to. I’m thinking of hiring a make up artist for an hour or two, bringing her my make up or buying what she recommends, and asking her to teach me a few basic looks. I know I could do this off of youtube but I have the disposable income to do this and I think it would be more effective. Is this a thing that is done?

    1. I bet you could totally pay somebody to do that. The thing for me at least, is that I just need a lot of practice. I can understand perfectly what I should do, I just can’t do it very well because I haven’t done it hundreds of times. I know I personally would just be better off buying extra product and practicing.

    2. Go to a makeup counter of a brand like Bobbi Brown or Clinique (good quality classic products) and ask for help.

    3. Yes! I’ve done this before. I went to a nice local department store and booked a consultation with one of the make up artists there. One of my friends regularly hired this person and so I knew I liked her work. She taught me how to do a date look and a work look. She would do one half of my face and then would have me do the other half. I thought it was fun, and it helped me feel like I could do my makeup (I found just watching the YouTube videos to be intimidating). Now that I’m a bit more confident with it, I will watch YouTube videos and try their methods or order different products and haven’t been back for another tutorial.

    4. I’ve done this. I booked a session with a makeup artist at a salon, whom I had used in the past and been happy with. I told her I wanted an everyday look I could do myself and I wrote down everything she did and all the products she used. Then I went out and bought what I needed, including the proper brushes.

      Now that you mention it I could do with a refresher course…

    5. It is a thing – I went to a makeup artist with my makeup in hand. We talked about what I wore there, went through my makeup, and did a couple new looks. She had some products on hand, a couple of which I bought.

    6. I booked a session with an image consultant several years ago. She taught me how to do makeup for work, for fancy events, and for every day, and also have me advice on my hair color and style. I highly recommend it, because she was kind but direct about playing up my good features and minimizing my less flattering features.

      1. I need this! Any chance it was in DC and you could share the stylist’s name?

        1. Sorry, I’m in Texas! But I think she does Zoom consultations: https://stoltzimage.com/ She is one of a handful of Certified Image Masters in the world and is awesome at her job.

          I did the body type analysis and a color analysis. Color analysis included the hair & makeup, as well as a “color fan” that I use to pick my new makeup and clothes. I have saved thousands of dollars on clothes, hair, and makeup in the 8 years since my initial consultation. It more than pays for itself.

  18. Ladies — a lot of credit card companies are converting to e-statements (which I hate b/c I can’t easily see them on my phone and resent another computer task). I just looked at one on my tiny screen and found $600 worth of fraudulent gift-card charges (so someone is also ripping off businesses). I called and it was reversed, but one other really fraudy one has a very sketchy website and wasn’t answering the stated phone number.

    Take a look the next time you get a statement (or now, to see activity).

    1. I guess this makes me a nerd, but I check my bank accounts and credit cards at least weekly for stuff like this. I almost never look at the actual statements, just recent activity when I have 30 seconds to kill waiting in line or for the microwave to heat or something like that. Statements do open just fine on my phone, though. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten paper statements, and I’m almost 40.

      1. Same, I check on the app every few days. I haven’t received a paper statement or looked at the actual statement in over 10 years. I’m in my late 30s, so I started my financial life back when balancing a checkbook was still a thing.

      2. I don’t check that often but review the month’s charges before submitting payment. It’s a lot easier on a monitor than a phone!!

        1. My husband checks every line item on all our credit cards. I always dread when he comes to me with that little “present” (not because of the expenditure, just the task)

    2. I am interpreting this to mean that there is a second fraudulent charge and you are tring to contact the business that made the charge. Is that correct? If you can’t reach them, report it to your card issuer and dispute it through them. Also, your card has been stolen. You need to report that to the issuer and get a new account number and card. You have a short window in which to do that before you lose certain protections, so do it now.

    3. Take a look at consumerfinance gov… I dont think they can refuse to give you paper statements in most circumstances without your consent. Maybe look in to revoking that consent, if you gave it?

    4. Don’t waste your time calling the stores. Contact your card issuer and report fraud. You need to replace your card.

    5. I wouldn’t waste your time contacting the retailer, I just call the credit card company.

      1. I find it easier, especially if you can turn on notifications when you make a purchase. I’d know almost instantly if there was an unauthorized charge.

    7. I do nothing financial on my phone. My electronics are completely siloed, with separate e-mail addresses for different parts of life (communicating with friends and family, online shopping, banking, freelancing, etc.)

      It may be mildly irritating to walk into a separate room and sit down at a desktop computer, but the peace of mind is priceless. A lost or stolen phone is nothing more than a minor inconvenience to me.

  19. A midweek win. I do informal midterm course evaluations for my continuing ed course. It’s my first time teaching online and the system is super weird so I can’t see anyone and at some point, a kid or a cat will appear behind me and it’s all a bit stressful. It seemed to be going okay but then someone wrote the most SCATHING evaluation. “What do you enjoy about the course? Nothing!” I realize it is unfashionable for research academics to really care about teaching but I do, and it dented my confidence a bit. Today, I dared to take a peek and got the most genuinely glowing evaluation and some really constructive ideas about how better to encourage participation (as always with these courses, there is one older man who likes the sound of his own voice).

    1. Good for you! I have taught in higher ed for 20+ years (in administration now) and know how hard it is to read and react calmly to evaluations. Sounds like a win! Yay!

    2. That is a huge win! The department I’m in charge of does an annual survey of the services we provide, and I always brace myself for ridiculous responses. I feel if it’s just one and doesn’t align at all with others, it’s not worth any of our energy.

      Participants in our survey are able to be anonymous (I’m sure our IT could find out who it was, but we wouldn’t do that short of something HR-worthy), but one year an employee who disclosed his email on the form unleashed an absolute tirade. It was absolutely batsh*t, especially because he hadn’t worked with us in any capacity in years! Turns out he had bad blood with our old director who had left a few years prior and apparently just reallllly wanted to nurse that grudge.

    3. I’ve seen my reviews on Rate My Professor and was always amused, as an online professor, that someone who had seen me once at an exam would rate me as “hot”, especially since I wasn’t going for hot, it was after a full day of work and I’m literally old enough to be the grandmother of a majority of the students.

  20. My wife and I did this. The artist we went with was a friend-of-a-friend. Her looks were much more glam than we typically do, but we had fun and I’m better at eyeliner than I was before.

  21. Thoughts on why using the Pfizer vaccine off-label for high-risk younger kids on a provider-prescribed basis is not being discussed? Maybe I am just not internetting well enough, but I can’t seem to find any discussion of this. I get that there would be major provider liability concerns with off-label use for kids when it is only approved for adults, but now that it is approved for 12 year olds, wouldn’t the liability risk for prescribing to slightly younger kids on a selective basis be much less?

    1. Another factor at play here is state guidelines for vaccine access. Even after the FDA granted authorization and the CDC made its recommendation, I couldn’t get my 14-year-old vaccinated until our state issued its own guidance.

    2. My niece just turned 11, but she is 5’2″ and 120 lbs already, so the size of a teen or small adult. But her pediatrician was very clear that my sister’s family needs to wait for her to be vaccinated after clinical trials on younger children are complete. She mentioned that, if they wanted to participate in a clinical trial for the Pfizer vaccine, it was an option, but of course, you don’t know if you got the vaccine or a placebo that way.

    3. I suspect the actual liability is still the same, but the perception might be changed and it probably varies tremendously from place to place.

      Anecdote: after the age was dropped, our PCP started scheduling the next day for 12-15 YO although the office administrators had not yet received formal approval to start giving the shots to this age. Our tween was in the consulting room for the first appointment of the morning while the nurses stood in the hall asking each other what to do, and we heard the more senior nurse say “We are close enough! Just give it, we will deal with any fallout if it comes.”

    4. This seems like a very specific question to your needs, why would this be widely discussed? Just go talk to your doctor for advice on vaccine for your child?

      1. It’s really going to come down to the doctor’s willingness to assume the risk. Pharmacies, and in our state public vaccination clinics, absolutely will not go beyond the state guidelines.

    6. Liability and lack of safety data. It’s one thing for a provider to give a drug off-label for an indication that is backed by peer-reviewed evidence. It’s a whole other thing to give a EUA product off-label with no backing evidence. Most providers don’t want to lose their license.

    7. they are trying smaller dosages for younger kids in the trials. this is completely different than a situation where a kid has cancer or some other condition and you’ve tried every other available treatment and a treatment only approved for adults is a last ditch effort. there are many things parents can do to minimize exposure for their super high risk kids and vaccine approval for kids is not years and years away. that being said, i personally am not the parent of a high risk kid and my heart goes out to all who are and the anxiety/stress you must feel

      1. +1 – Not an expert, but as a parent of an 8 year old, it seems hard to justify from a risk-benefit perspective. It is exceedingly rare for COVID to cause serious problems in kids under 12. So why take the risk of the vaccine causing some problem when trial data will likely be available soon? I can’t imagine a lot of pediatricians would want to get behind that.

        1. Sorry I just re-read your OP’s original question and realized it is focused on high-risk kids. That makes it trickier for sure.

    8. Liability.
      It’s not like you just give kids a smaller dose of vaccine product. The manufacturers of some of the vaccines basically have to reformulate the product… a scientist on the inside told me it is like re-developing the vaccine for this other patient population.

  22. What are the pros and cons to doing a balance transfer to a new card that has an introductory 0% interest rate? I know that if you don’t pay it off in the introductory period, interest gets applied to the whole thing. I know there’s a fee to do the balance transfer, which works out to be equivalent to maybe two or three months interest on the current card. I’m not sure if I’m missing anything else.

    My personal finances have always felt very two steps forward, one step back and I know I’m not as savvy or good at it as many of you ladies here. I’ve got my credit card debt down to about $4000 and have implemented some so far permanent changes to my habits that I’m very proud of. I could definitely handle ~10 monthly payments to pay that off before the introductory period ends plus some breathing room. I just don’t have the experience and knowledge to know if this is gimmicky or a truly useful tool.

    1. I actually did this in my late 20’s, and it did really help! It was geared toward debt consolidation and repayment though, so not only was there 0% interest for 15 months, I think it also had a good deal on balance transfers; it was a while ago though, and I can’t remember all the specifics. I also made a point of paying more than just the minimum balance as often as I could, to speed up paying it off.

      The reality is, you have debt, so your options are keep the debt where it is and pay interest, or move it somewhere where you don’t have to pay interest while you work on paying it off.

    2. You’re doing great. A balance transfer can be a useful tool if you can pay it off before the penalies hit – which it sounds like you can! So go for it. (Or even better, shop around and see if you can transfer your balance without a fee – sometimes you can!)

      If you want to keep feeling more confident in personal finance, I like HerMoney (the podcast – try a mailbag episode to get a feel since the guests can be all over the place) and Broke Millenial as starting places. You can do it!

    3. Good job for taking control of your debt, planning to be rid of it soon, and changing your habits! That’s the hardest part. I did several balance transfers when I was paying off my cc debt. You’ve got the downsides. I’d add another – you’re opening up another credit card (probably) and they’re going to give you a high limit because they want you to get into debt on that one, too. So be careful with the new card to only pay it off, not add to it. If you know you can handle the payments over the period in order to pay it off fully by that deadline (and it sounds like you do), and you stick with that plan, then I think you came out ahead. Cc interest is what KILLED me on paying off my debt. But I paid off 57k so I know you can pay yours too.

    4. Pros – pay off the balance quickly with zero interest

      Cons – fee to do the transfer (usually less than the interest you otherwise pay; sometimes you can find a fee-free one)
      Your credit score will take a hit because you are adding available credit; it probably will be recovered by the time you pay it all off

      I’ve done it a couple of times to help spread out big purchases. Definitely plan to pay it off in 2-3 months shorter than the term to give yourself some breathing room. If you aren’t going to make it by the end of the intro period, you are better off opening yet another 0% balance transfer card.

      You also have to have the discipline to not run up the original card again — they are counting on you to fall back into your old habits!

    5. It sounds like you mostly understand this and it has at times been a truly useful tool for me. The only potential misconception you may have is how the interest is applied if you don’t pay it off in the intro period. Please check the language in the specific offer you are responding to. Very important. But generally there are two different carrots credit cards offer. One is usually offered by retailers, which is a low interest financing deal for a specific period on a significant in-store purchase (e.g., Best Buy will offer 0% for 24 months on an appliance purchase over $400). Usually, if you do not pay off that full balance before the end of the period, they will retroactively apply interest from the date of purchase. That is a major hammer and generally you should avoid such deals if you aren’t going to pay within the period. The other version is more typical from financial institutions that issue cards, which is simply a period of low interest on the balance transfer portion and then, if at the end of that period, you have not paid it in full, they will then treat the remaining balance as an ordinary charge and apply your regular interest rate going forward (but not retroactively).
      The other thing to be concerned about is how you will use the card during the introductory period. If the intro rate applies only to balance transfers, you should check how the issuer will apply payments going forward. This is particularly an issue with retailer cards that allow for use outside the retailer. If you have the 0% for 24-month purchase on the card and also make new purchases during that 24 months, your payments will get applied to the new purchases first and could jeopardize whether you end up paying off that 0% purchase before the deadline and put you at risk of getting hammered with that retroactive interest. You need to have a $0 balance at the end of the period for it to work in your favor.

    6. I did this back in law school to carry a balance without paying interest, and it worked out fine for me. Con is the fee, but seems you’re already aware of that.

  23. Has anyone tried machine washing an MM Lafleur jardigan?

    They have some sale colors I’m interested in and I like the look of the garment but I’m trying to break up with dry cleaning.

    1. I have not, but dry cleaning seems to have caused shininess around the cuffs of mine so I am going to try washing the next one instead.

    2. I have washed mine multiple times, don’t put it in the dryer, it’s been fine!

    3. I’ve washed dozens of times (had it for years) and lay flat to dry, and it looks the same!

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