Weekend Open Thread: Miami

101 Comments

1. How would you style a black MM Lafleur Etsuko dress to look current in 2026? It’s still my favorite dress fit-wise.

   1. pointed-toe flats, bold pendant necklace.

   2. Throw away the belt. Add a wide animal print belt and some snip toe or mesh flats.

   3. Based on the first two answers, I guess the answer is “make it uglier.”

      1. I had to look up “snip toe” and was not impressed 😂

      2. Agreed. It’s a very classic dress, I’d still wear it with pointed toe pumps for a more formal work or dinner out look.

   4. Looked it up on their website to confirm the style. Their styling is awful! I think a stylish jacket would make a big difference, and great jewellery. For shoes, I’d go with whatever is current, I think relativelylow but interesting ones like this https://thefoldlondon.com/product/clever-crepe-oliena-skirt-black/ perhaps in a non-black color. I’d wear the belt with the dress.

2. If you had to stay near DC on July 4 for a camp dropoff the next day (and thus wanted a good night sleep), is it a bad idea to stay near DCA? Trying to decide if farther out would be better, but parking at the hotel would be nice assuming I can retrieve car after kid is dropped off.

   1. Where is the drop-off? There are plenty of hotels near DCA in Crystal City, with a lot of restaurants nearby and close Metro access; I stay for meetings twice year at the Hilton Garden and it’s perfectly fine and has an attached garage.

      1. ah I can see that being relevant. Since I guess I don’t know if I would want to drive him there or not, don’t have a good sense of how much he’s bringing. Going to camp at georgetown.

         1. Georgetown, or Georgetown Prep? The latter runs summer camps too but is in suburban MD

      2. It would be a pretty short drive, maybe 15 minutes, from Crystal City to Georgetown. There’s no metro station in or near Georgetown, so you’ll want to drive there or stay very close to campus.

   2. Yep, the question is where are you going. 10 miles can be 45 minutes in the DC area.

   3. Be aware that the Red Line is closed from Grosvenor station (in Rockville) through the Bethesda station, from July 7 until September 6. So, don’t stay in Bethesda if you are planning on taking the metro anywhere!

3. Hey, looking for some of that fabulous Corpore++e travel advice! I am going to Mallorca in August to catch the total solar eclipse, and it turns out we will have a free day in La Palma. We are already booked for a city tour and the Caves of Drach on other days, so any other suggestions for a free day in Mallorca? Thanks in advance!

   1. I LOVE Mallorca. I think it’s so underrated, especially with Americans – I’ve barely met anyone who’s been. Palma is a super cute city but it’s pretty small and compact so I don’t know that you need more than 1 full day there. I assume your city tour includes the Cathedral and Llotja? Those are the main ‘attractions’ in Palma, so I’d be inclined to get out of the city with this extra day. The island has some really beautiful beaches. If you enjoy being on the water, you can charter a boat and sail around the island and swim at different spots. If you want to do a land-based excursion, Mirador des Colomer is a bit of a drive but has gorgeous views of the coastline. The Port de Soller area is also cute. Enjoy! We don’t repeat vacations much but really hope to get back there some day.

      1. Ooh, thanks! Chartering a boat sounds great!

   2. I was just there in May. Renting a bike is great, even if you just ride up and down along the beach. I used Berganti Bikes, but there are many.
      I’ll be honest, I was disappointed with Mallorca. The food isn’t as good as other cities in Spain in my view, with the exception of paella. We tried many, and in my view the best was at a spot called Golden Tap along the beach.
      We did a walking tour of the old town which was a bit of a snoozer in my view. There really isn’t enough to see… Besides that and biking, I didn’t do anything touristy but from what I saw on my rides, I would definitely recommend setting up some tours or excursions. I know there is an aquarium nearby? And I saw a tour operator who offered hot air balloon rides on the island?

      1. What food did you tried? Taking in consideration that paellas in not a Mallorca dish I am curious. Trempó? coca? sobrasada? arros brut? pica-pica? tumbet? ensaimada? gato?

   3. Thanks, ladies! My travel companions aren’t super into the boat so we booked a paella cooking class that looks fun. This day is in the middle of a four-week trip so I imagine we will be happy for some down time other than that!

      1. I’m so jealous you’re going to see the eclipse in Mallorca! Here are some recommendations for things to see in Mallorca if you haven’t already included them in your plans for the other days (beaches not included).

         – Deià and Valldemossa
         – Sóller (there’s a very cute little wooden train that leaves from Palma)
         All three towns are beautiful and perfect for a stroll with an ice cream. If you’re not renting a car, choose Sóller; the train runs from Palma all the time.

         And if you have a guided tour of the city, I imagine you’ll see:
         – The cathedral
         – La Almudaina Palace
         – Sa Llotja (the old exchange building)
         Try the local food; I love the grilled sobrasada with honey and the ensaimada pastry, but they also have lots of delicious fish and rice dishes (trempo, coca, arros brut, tumbet..)

         (Palma is the capital of Mallorca; La Palma is the Canary Island; Las Palmas is the capital of Gran Canaria. Don’t worry, tourists often get them mixed up.)

   4. oh, my gosh, I’m here right now! we only had a couple days and agree that the center of town doesn’t have much beyond typical European high street stores. We did just do a day trip with a guy who drives you around to some of the nice beaches in the SE of the island and brings beach blankets and umbrellas, which was exhausting but nice to see more of the island without a rental car.

   5. Wow, thanks, everyone! We are super excited about this trip — I had giant FOMO after the last total eclipse so this has been booked almost since then. Can’t believe it’s almost here!

4. I am meeting family (siblings, college age niece) for a rare short trip to Newport and surrounds. We used to visit relatives there when I was a child. We are hoping to relieve memories of clam cakes and casual but delicious seaside eateries, and New England peacefulness/beauty.

   Any recs? Will be there early Sept.

   We will walk the Cliff walk (and I may break off to see a mansion – my relatives wont be interested in that). Not sure how long that takes. What else would you recommend? Should we drive somewhere else near Newport for a day – like Little Compton or Narragansett to get away from the crowds and eat on the seaside?

   My siblings are very casual and we want simple but delicious seaside clam shack type places and beautiful scenery.

   1. We stopped at the Matunuck Oyster Bar for dinner (about a half hour outside of Newport IIRC) and it was gorgeous casual vibes, though a step up from a shack type place. Found Newport itself to almost be a caricature of itself.

   2. I adore Newport. I toured most of the mansions. The Breakers is very crowded. I much preferred Marble House and The Elms. Rough Point is on my agenda for next time. I loved drinks/lunch at Castle Hill Inn and drinks at the Vanderbilt Auberge. I also loved walking around the Trinity church area. They also have the Audrain Auto Museum that is very close to the International Tennis Hall of Fame.

   3. There is nowhere of note to eat in LC (although that is my preferred beach destination) and depending on how early “early Sept” is, Narragansett will either be young kids or URI kids. Fun for sure, but not necessarily any less hectic than Newport. I would day trip to Warren (closer; more cute-town-walk rather than beach) or Westerly if you feel like leaving. Avoid moving the car; traffic is horrible.

   4. Look at Tiverton – a bit more of a drive, but there’s the Boat House, Sakonnet River Grill, and Evelyn’s (which I think would meet the clam shack vibe).

      Someone mentioned Warren – look at the Wharf Tavern and the Palmer River Grill.

      If you go to Narragansett, I think you’re required by law to go to the Coast Guard House, George’s of Galilee, or Iggy’s.

      1. Oh, and in Warren: Blount’s Seafood has been around forever, I think, but my mother (who lives nearby) says Amaral’s has the best fried clams.

   5. Thanks for these useful recs.

      We will be going on September 1st. We aren’t really sit on the beach types, but may walk along a beach. Are there any other nice walks/hikes/drives you recommend, with places to take breaks/eat along the way?

5. if you’re the parent of a teenager, how do you deal with the stress of knowing they can screw their entire lives up in these few short years and you can’t do anything about it despite being right here

   1. I’m not saying that parents have control, but there is a lot that parents of teens can do for good and for ill. Maybe get a good therapist and make sure you’re not one of the risk factors? And if school isn’t going well, get them into a better situation.

   2. I hear you.

      For academics — I guess I comfort myself with the knowledge that few mistakes are SO bad that they can’t recover from them. I have a very self-motivated kid, but I will admit that I’m having trouble accepting what he wants to major in. I am not telling him this, of course, but I worry a lot about what happens after graduation and how easy it’ll be to find a job.

      Drinking / drugs / partying / etc. — I try to remind myself that we are having conversations, often, about our values and expectations. I hope that if he screws up, it’s not in a life-threatening way. We try to be people he wants to talk to …

      I almost have to tell myself to take things one day at a time and to not borrow trouble. Because I can be an anxious person, and I know it’s not healthy or good for him, so it’s up to me to keep my worries in check or talk to a trusted person about them.

      1. After the maximum merit scholarship, I will still end up spending six figures for my child to earn a degree that will only qualify her for a career that will never allow her to support herself fully. At first we demanded that she take a second backup major, but after three semesters it became clear that it was making her miserable so we gave up. Oh well. After a couple of years she’ll realize her mistake and then incur massive debt to earn a gradute degree for a career she hates just like I did.

         1. This seems very pessimistic. Lots of people pivot and end up doing something that’s unrelated to their undergrad major. If she wants a grad degree there’s a good chance she can get merit funding there too, especially if she was bright enough to earn a “maximum merit scholarship” for undergrad. AI is going to upend a lot of traditionally lucrative careers anyway, I think.

            1. Right. There’s no sure path to financial stability. Why make yourself miserable in a career you hate? Life is too short to chase dollars at the expense of the rest of your life.

         2. My parents were not great in many ways, but I so appreciate that they let me study whatever I wanted and said nothing about how it wasn’t economically viable.

         3. Oh Lord. Just let her be a teacher and be a positive person in her community. I’m sure she’ll find a lifestyle that works for her. It doesn’t have to work for you.

            1. I thought it might be that person too. So dramatic. Being a teacher is hardly ruining your life. Yes the profession should pay more, but she’s not going to be destitute, especially if she chooses to settle in a LCOL place. I have a teacher neighbor with a firefighter husband and 4 kids. They’re not rich but they’re not impoverished. Teachers have good pensions compared to the public and don’t need to save as much for retirement.

            2. Teaching is also a 9 month job so it’s a bit disingenuous to compare the salary to salaries for 12 month jobs. Before she has kids she can get a summer job that will supplement the teaching salary nicely. If/when she has kids she’ll save a boatload on summer childcare.

            3. FWIW, I think teachers should be paid a lot more, but people make it work even in my VHCOL area. Why don’t you encourage her to get into school administration? Those jobs can be pretty high-paying for the public sector and we need good, smart people in those jobs.

   3. Short of being found guilty of a felony or k*lling themselves or someone else there’s not much they can do that’s truly life-ruining. I do worry about teen mental health a fair amount (three kids in my orbit have died by su*cide in the last few years). But I feel good about where my kids are at, and if you don’t there are steps you can take. Not to minimize the damage of other mistakes, because there are definitely less significant things that still have major consequences, but reminding myself that most bad decisions are not irreversible helps.

      1. In my line of work I do see these things happen. It’s sobering. Lecturing kids on all the ways acting stupid could legitimately ruin their lives is ineffective, though.

      2. Teen su*cide scares me a lot. In one case I’m aware of, the girl had no prior history of mental health issues. But one day, after an argument with someone, she made an impulsive decision that ended her life.

         1. This. It can be very circumstantial and impulsive. There’s not always a mental health issue to treat.

            When I was young there was a lot of focus on making sure we had things to look forward to and responsibilities (even if it was a pet). Just whatever might help us think beyond the big feelings. But there were still some attempts I can remember.

   4. no he’s a bright kid just a B+ kind of guy, but if he’s motivated he’s all in. we hate our state so state school isn’t that attractive. no drugs etc problems, just having trouble sitting on my hands while he’s learning to drive the proverbial bus.

      1. If he goes to an out-of-state public college, he can get residency after a year and thus in-state tuition. It’s not that catastrophic.

         And I find it sad that a B+ = failure.

         An acquaintance spent a lunch time moaning about her sophomore daughter’s awful grades, going on and on… turns out she was getting As AND Bs… The horror!

   5. You don’t give up on your job of parenting. You can’t stop every bad outcome but you have more influence than you think. In my affluent town, these teens aren’t buying their own motorcycles or smartphones – their parents are providing them. You don’t have to provide your kid with the stuff that can harm or kill them.

      1. You’re not going to provide your teen with a phone? In 2026? Because it might “kill them”?

         1. She said a smartphone. Everyone needs some kind of phone.

         2. Kids have access to lots of harm w a smartphone. Why should we pretend this isn’t true? Convenience and conformity are not a good enough reasons.

            1. Every child activity over grade 9 requires a smart phone. Plus you wwnt to track them if they’re traveling for band etc

            2. Not true, and tracking your child is not necessary.

            3. I think you’re in a weird bubble if every activity over grade 9 requires a smart phone. Plenty of families opt for something cheaper.

            4. 90% of teenagers have regular access to a smart phone. Friends, schools, and extra-curricular activities will all assume access. And honestly, I am not sure how you both teach your teen to navigate their own lives (keeping track of assignments, schedules, events, etc.) while at the same time not giving them access to the tools they need to do that.

            5. All of the school assignment stuff can be managed from a computer. Teens need consistent internet access but it doesn’t have to be on a phone.

         3. I am very anti-smart phone for younger children, but on a practical level your high school student will need one for many reasons – both academic and social.

            But also, OP you are falling prey to the classic trap of thinking that teenagers today are uniquely and horribly at risk for bad outcomes. Please do not misunderstand me – the teen suicide rate is much too high, research into its increase since the mid 2000s definitely needs to be done and even one is a tragedy. All of that said, if you have a teen now, you were likely a teen in the 90s when the suicide rate (and basically every other “bad outcome” rate) was much, much higher than it is now. Which is not to say do not worry. Of course you will worry, but as a friend told me when my kid was a teen (now five years past), “I would play your odds in Vegas any day.”

            And as someone else said, short of killing themselves or someone else, there is very little a teen can do that will “ruin” their life – although they can certainly make them substantially more difficult.

            1. There are still far too many deaths by automobile, but in my home county, there were a half-dozen fatal accidents involving teens pretty much every single year. It’s a lot rarer nowadays.

               My kids know they can always, always call me for a ride if there has been drinking and they also have a rideshare app on their phone.

   6. Read the Age of Opportunity by Larry Steinberg as it talks about different parenting styles. Adolescense is a dangerous time due to the teens’ proclivity for risk taking. But the good news is that the desire for risk is what helps them grow and leave the nest.

   7. Parenthood is ideally a slow-moving exercise in learning the limitations of our capacity to control others and in learning to release anxiety over that lack of control. So the answer is … you just do your best to provide the support to drift them in the directions you want, while acknowledging that they’re in a boat with an engine and can cut against the flow you’re creating in the water any time.

   8. Denial? I mean, I know that theoretically they could get pregnant or suffer a catastrophic injury or commit a crime, but I don’t spend my days being anxious about it. That said, they are reasonably well-behaved kids and good students with a lot of family resources. I was way more concerned about the youngest losing his life as a small child with no understanding of his own mortality (e.g., loved to run towards traffic, all strangers were friends, etc.).

6. I hear women who say they can’t wear button down tops with large chests. I have the opposite problem. My shoulders are narrow and I am flat chested by I have a belly and wide hips. Looking for a summer button down, long or short sleeve, that covers the belly but isn’t huge on the top and doesn’t hang down on my shoulder area.

   1. I think you probably have to skip this look. But depending on your size, boys size oxfords could work. I’m a US 8, but wear a boys XL/18.

      1. The only woman who has ever looked good in any button-front top is Allison Janney as CJ Cregg. Unless you are her, I would skip it. Too dumpy and rumply, especially for women with narrow shoulders who are not 5’12”.

         1. lol! I am not wearing them as a fashion statement. If only we all were tall and thin like Allison Janney and Zendaya. I regularily go to prisons and jails to visit clients and I want something that looks professional but is cool in the heat. Otherwise, unless I wear a jacket in 96 degree weather, I have to manage whether it is too tight, too low cut, sleeves too short. Even cap sleeves or a small cut-out in the back or keyhole in the front will cause issues. I also prefer not to be tucked in and hate when the shirt looks funny over the waist of the pant. I will try the boy option or spring for Frank and Eileen. If I had just one go-to, I’d be happier.

      2. This a genius idea! I’ve been wearing boys t shirts so I don’t know why I didn’t try their shirts too.

         Thanks for asking the question OP from a fellow tiny shouldered friend currently ignoring the perimenopausal paunch.

         1. Don’t men’s button downs have buttons on the opposite side from women’s button downs? So people will know it’s a boy’s shirt unfortunately.

            1. Not a thing. I don’t imagine most people are paying attention, and if they are, I don’t believe that they care even a little bit.

            2. Omg who cares.

   2. The Eileen by Frank & Eileen is pretty universally flattering – it doesn’t button as high or low as a traditional shirt. They’re worth the money.

7. Is it just me or does it feel like u need 8 figures to even approach the “wealthy” point?

   1. probably just you.

   2. Depends on your outgoings, mainly whether you own, rent or have a big mortgage.

      I’m 5 figures but I own my home outright, have solar panels and an electric car, no kids, grow lots of my own food and I feel wealthy.

   3. Just you. It does scale by cost of living but I don’t think there’s anywhere in the US you need $10M to be wealthy. Fwiw I started feeling pretty wealthy when we had $1M in non-house assets and now with around $2M we buy essentially everything we want – we obviously can’t buy a private jet or a yacht but you can’t really buy that kind of stuff with $10M either. Age is obviously a factor – a 30 year old with $1M is far richer than a 60 year old with $1M – but I still think 8 figures is way off base.

      1. I’m always uneasy with the situation where annual medical expenses exceed HHI, even if they’re covered by insurance. But realistically that’s what insurance is for and statistically no one pays out of pocket.

         1. It doesn’t make a lot of sense to me to plan around medical costs because medical expenses fluctuate so much. Most years our expenses are very minimal and would be even without health insurance (just preventative care). But if you get cancer or something like that, without insurance you could blow through millions very quickly.

            1. I’m thinking more of a condition that is highly treatable but the meds cost five to six figures monthly and there’s no such thing as remission or a cure. Not as expensive as cancer, but a lot more predictable (of course it’s possible to also get cancer on top of that!).

            2. I meant five figures monthly and six figures annually. There used to be very few maintenance meds that cost this much, but there seem to be more and more.

            3. It happens (rarely) and in most cases, those people are effed. That says everything about our system and nothing about what is reasonable to save for.

            4. Okay. My household has three diagnoses in this category. So what’s reasonable now?

            5. Do you not qualify for disability at that point?

            6. I’m not sure how you think disability works, but no, having conditions with expensive treatments doesn’t qualify people for disability.

   4. You can’t seriously be saying someone with $9m in assets is not wealthy.

   5. I agree with you.

   6. I think the issue is that you personally earn more money, you are exposed to increasing levels of people who have more than you do. So although I would be ‘wealthy’ by millions of people’s standards, it’s easy to then see people with multiples of your assets as what ‘wealth’ means. I don’t know that this EVER stops. See, Elon.

      1. +1. The wealthier I become the more I find myself feeling that I need or want things I didn’t even knew existed even a few years ago. I am aware of this phenomenon which can help shut down the thoughts of “needing” something that I know I objectively don’t need (or even want sometimes!). Being aware of this sometimes helps but it doesn’t make the initial thought go away.

         also the hedonistic treadmill is a real trip. Even without seeing new things to want, the human brain gets used to things way too easily so things that seemed like the height of luxury or some huge indulgence at one point suddenly become dull or expected. It’s cliche but a gratitude journal helps with this but the human instinct to keep wanting more is really frustrating!

         1. I honestly think the human instinct to keep wanting more is supposed to be a creative impulse, but our whole culture channels it into buying stuff. Framing it that way makes me not feel as bad about it even if I don’t follow through on a creative project.

   7. Never change, commentariat. Never change.

8. Anyone have a recommendation for a red light hair cap to help regrow hair?

9. Maybe a long shot, but does anyone know of any blazers that are tolerant of a larger athletic build…off the rack?

   I’ve always had fairly broad shoulders for a woman, and it only took a little extra muscle mass to make my old blazers unwearable. I mostly wear sleeveless tops/dresses and sweaters to work these days.

   I’m willing to get things altered if I need to, but it would be cheaper to start with a jacket that fits my shoulders without being a tent everywhere else.

   TIA!

   1. I know this is late, but try Universal Standard. I have the same issues with shoulders and arms, and the Percy fit me surprising well without any alterations.

10. Any advice for dating as a post-college adult when you live at home to save money and he lives at home to save money, both in different suburbs of your city? I feel like I am in the 1950s by accident. I went away to college, as did he, but it’s hard to go back to dating like a young teen would. How many movies can you see? Help me figure this out please!

    1. Making our in a car is still fun at 30.

    2. Either a weekend a way once per month or one of you decides to bite the bullet and move out.

       1. This. Time to grow up.

          1. Eh. This is very cultural. There are plenty of cultural backgrounds where living with your parents until marriage is what is expected and not a signal of immaturity.

       2. Yes. Use some of that money you’re both saving to go on getaways.

          Also there must be tons of stuff you can do for dates besides movies. It’s not a bad idea to find things you both enjoy.

    3. Are you asking about date activities (like bowling, painting classes, trivia nights at bars, picnics, escape rooms, museum visits, hikes, etc.), or finding a reasonable time/place to garden, or something else?

    4. Are you planning to marry this guy? If so, move in together and test him out. A small one bed in a ‘no fancy amenities building’ should be affordable.

       If it doesn’t work out move back home and continue saving.

    5. Movies, museums, walks by the river, picnics, opera, hiking, kayaking.

       Spend time together. Get drinks after work. Go for a run together.

       As for the physical aspect – make out in your cars and splurge for a hotel room on occasion.

    6. What would you be doing if you both had your own places? My husband and I both had studio apartments. We would get together on Tuesdays to do our laundry at the laundry mat next to the 7-11. Honestly, I think you need to grow up a bit before getting into a committed relationship. Otherwise, neither of you will know how you handle real pressure and responsibility.

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