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Thursday’s Workwear Report: Helena Divine Jersey Gathered Tee

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A woman (head and lower legs cropped out) wearing brown wide-leg pants and a brown-and-white polka dot top

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

How pretty is the print on this jersey top from Universal Standard? It’s giving me some Julia Roberts at the polo match in Pretty Woman vibes, but in a slightly more modern way. This would be a great option for wearing under suits and blazers this summer because the cap sleeves still give plenty of coverage if you have to take your jacket off.

If the dot pattern isn’t your thing, it also comes in five solids, including a lipstick red and a beautiful dark green.

The top is $98 at Universal Standard and comes in sizes that are equivalent to standard sizes 00-40.

Looking for more T-shirts with fun but professional prints for 2026? Some classic brands to check include L'Agence, Boden and The Kit. These may be on the more casual side, but also look at Lilly Pulitzer and Sanctuary.

Sales of note for 6/2:

218 Comments

  1. Has anyone read the book Yesteryear? I read it in 3 days and finished last night bc it was a train wreck I couldn’t look away from. I’m not sure I loved it but I have a lot of thoughts. It’s already been optioned for a movie starring Anne Hathaway. That should be interesting.

    1. Yes! I read it, and then picked it for my next book club meeting. It has so many themes that will be interesting for discussion. With you in that I also can’t wait to see the adaptation.

          1. Hi, librarian here. Your book is not likely to be put into circulation by the time you donate it.

        2. This is unkind. People have a lot of different reasons for using the library/purchasing books (financial, etc and many do both). Phrasing it more nicely is likely to be a better way to get engagement on a topic

          2. People do things for a lot of reasons, and I fully support library use. That said, if you can afford to support an author, and then donate the book into circulation, do it. I don’t think this is a thing you have to phrase nicely for it to be true.

        4. You do realize you don’t have to say everything that comes into your head, right? I’m sure many people would support that. Love to see others using their local libraries!

          1. You do realize that if you want to have nice things, like books and bookstores, you need to actually buy the books. 100 people sharing a book is just not profitable in the way that selling actual copies is. How about instead of railing against Amazon and the like, you support authors and journalism.

          2. Some things clearly need to be said. Maybe the arts and authors should be publicly funded, but they aren’t, and if you want them to keep writing, you need to support them.

          3. I support authors I already like by preordering! My understanding is that this helps them the most.

            Most new books I try from new-to-me authors are bad and DNF, so no, I’m not going to buy them without borrowing them from the library first. And borrowing a library book is better for authors than borrowing the same book from a friend, I promise.

          4. Agree with 11:44. I read a lot, and I buy books from authors I know and things I’m likely to reread, the library is for trying new things. There are plenty of books I get from the library and then later buy because I liked them so much, but this one was definitely not worth the hype.

          5. Libraries are also nice things, and we also need to support them for them to stay in existence.

        5. This is just absurd. Both options support authors and are important like all the versions of tv, radio, film, etc. I personally read 50 books a year, most I get from multiple libraries (some of which I pay a fee to for membership). But I also don’t finish a lot more books than that. I buy books as well either because it’s an author I love or when I go to an author event. People can do both and we don’t have to chastise them for using libraries.

          1. Yes. It is a good thing to support your local library! For so many reasons.

            I promise it’s better for authors to have strong local libraries.

        6. This site is the place to come to when you want to be told that literally anything you’re doing is wrong.

          1. Right? With the number of terrible DNF books I’ve come across in the last several years, which I expect to be made worse by AI slop, there’s no way I’m buying every book.

        7. You do realize that many people live in apartments and read a lot, and can’t store hundreds of extra books, right?

          2. I can’t believe someone is defending giving more money to Amazon over patronizing the library.

          3. Replying again to this pathetic nonsense. Kindles hurt my eyes and I prefer physical books! I buy books sometimes but love the library. You’ve inspired me to borrow 3 more books from the library than I had planned on :)

    5. I read it, and found it initially interesting but ultimately overhyped. The characters were so over the top awful that i found it found it a little hard to draw much broader meaning from it (besides the fact that everyone is misogynistic, but that’s not exactly a novel concept).

      1. I felt most of the characters, especially the main character, were pure caricature with no real depth or development.
        The other big weakness was the many world-building inconsistencies: the portrayal of an elite college, the (lack of a) religious community, everything was just a bit too far off.
        So, great idea, terrible execution.

        1. It reminded me of Yellowface – satire that was just too over the top. It was entertaining but didn’t make any profound points about its subject.

          1. I generally like RF Kuang and I loathed Yellowface. If this is similar I think I’ll pass. A whole book of ‘characters you love to hate’ isn’t a draw for me.

    6. I was very intrigued by the premise but was ultimately disappointed. I felt like the ending didn’t pay off.

    7. I didn’t love it. Clearly the main character is an unreliable narrator. I thought she was having postpartum psychosis. The character development is just okay. I would watch it for Anne Hathaway though.

      I just read Lily and the Octopus. It’s got actual surrealism and is very well written.

    8. I had the exact same thoughts and told a friend she should read it for the WTF-ery of it all and so she and I could discuss ;)

  2. I feel like I’m living in the late 1980s: cropped blouses. A-line skirts ending below the knee. Claw clamps for hair.

    I’m waiting for:
    huaraches (IDK if they are truly comfy or I just had the easy feet of a child then, but a fond memory)
    perms
    acid-wash

    What I remember was also this strange dichotomy: tons of fabric in clothes. One-piece bathing suits that looked like slingshots, with very narrow and high cut leg openings (do not miss; high wedgie potential and waxing nightmare).

    1. Ha! Hauraches have been my summer shoe for the past two years–wearing a pair right now!

    3. Acid wash is also back! I have a pair, but they’re a very light wash, so the effect is a little more subtle than what I remember from the ’80s.

    4. I even saw someone saying how drop waists are back and woo. They look different than the blousy drop waist dresses of the 80s but I can’t remember ever seeing more than I am right now.

      1. Honestly, I only wore them for the first time fairly recently (40 something millennial) and they meet a lot of my needs. I’ll probably keep wearing them even if they phase out of fashion (but not style!).

  3. I bought a trapeze dress. I am a bit concerned that the shape is maybe too avant-garde for suburbia and I just will be taken as a person hiding an abdominal secret. It’s a lot of volume to belt though. Any advice for styling? I didn’t want fabric sticking to me in the summer.

    1. I love that you’re taking the risk and following for tips. I think you just gotta own it.

      1. Same—if it otherwise works for your life, you’re just going to have to prepare yourself to not care what others *might* think. It’s really freeing once you realize that no one (important) cares.

      2. I personally did not wear that style anytime during my childbearing years. Too easy for rumors to get started lol

    2. Key is length — you have to show a lot of leg to make it not look like a sack. Otherwise, style it casually! Sneakers, ponytail. Let it be the easy-breezy dress it’s supposed to be.

      (p.s. “abdominal secret” made me laugh)

      2. This and wear shorts underneath so you aren’t constantly worried. A short, full dress shows a lot more than a short, tight dress.

        And balance with chunkier shoes.

        1. I disagree with the chunkier shoes. The shape of the dress is already full and chunky. Sleeker shoes is my preference – sandals, fashion sneakers, or flats.

    3. Too much volume is apparently very in right now. I’ve been returning stuff like crazy because that’s not a flattering look for me, but it’s very popular.

    4. I’d wait for a nice hot day, and just wear it — in spite of feeling unsure. Sandals or sneakers for shoes, no need to belt or try to define your waist. You’re going to LOVE how breezy it is!

    5. Don’t try to belt it! Just make sure the rest of your look sells it as a fashion statement (whatever that means for you, the nice bag, the statement eye or lip, etc.).

    6. Wear cool, intentional shoes and you’ll be golden. I would do something chunky, myself.

    7. Ann Mashburn is showing with high espadrilles. I like it, although I tie mine fully around the ankle and not up the leg. Alternatively, have a look at these Castener sandals. I have them and they are pretty comfortable. There’s a lower version too.

      https://shopmashburn.com/collections/ann-mashburn-dresses/products/ann-mashburn-atelier-volume-kami-dress-blue-lizzy-liberty-fabric-s79604

      https://castaner.com/en-us/products/sandalia-trenzados-marron-osc-valle-142?country=US

  4. My birthday is coming up – has anyone bought any necklaces lately that you’re getting a lot of use out of or compliments on (or just that you love)? No real budget but ideally under $2000.

    1. I have a lapis bead necklace that I got it at Faba (on a work trip). It was about $1500. I love it. We had a free trade agreement with Chile at the time so I didn’t have to pay any customs fee when I brought it home. I don’t know whether that’s still true.

    2. A 15 inch rope gold necklace, vintage/second hand. Parlay Jewelry online has some options.

    5. I just bought an initial necklace from Gorjana for myself for my birthday. I get a lot of compliments including a coworker who saw it and went right to the store to buy one.

      1. My daughter has one (birthday gift from boyfriend) and I think it is super cute!

  5. I used to be a law clerk to a state court trial job and other than the pay (tragically low), it was the best job I ever had (and I love the job I have had for the past 20 years in private practice). Husband is talking about retiring. I’m not there yet. Would going back to be a clerk in the court system (not working for a judge, not even a JD-required job) be something where an older person who wants to stay sharp and get health care be given a shot? I’d clerk again , but those jobs turn over every year (one friend who was a permanent law clerk had his judge retire). I just remember good health care, solid time off, and actually closing for holidays. Also: the pens were so bad I started buying my own at Office Max and we never had enough printer paper.

    1. I worked in courts on and off for a while and absolutely saw people start these kinds of jobs at an older age, but I do think the answer to your question is going to be super-local.

    2. If you were a law clerk, surely you must know what the court clerk’s office is like—even lower pay to handle mind-numbing volumes of paperwork and interact with confused, stressed, and angry members of the public.

      2. I think this assessment of the clerk’s office is spot on. Working in the clerk’s office sounds horrible if you’re a lawyer.

        In my state, the appellate courts have career staff attorneys who work for the court for 5-30 years, even as judges turn over. In some states, the state appellate courts also have a group of lawyers who do work for all of the judges rather than being assigned to any particular judge, and some if not all of the federal circuit courts do too.

    3. I work in a trial court and yes, many of our clerks are hired later in life — and they are amazing clerks. We also have permanent staff attorney positions, as well as attorneys who create and update forms in our law library. There are a ton of job options at trial courts. Our state court of appeals and supreme court also hire permanent staff attorneys.

    4. In my state, the chief and deputy chief appellate clerks are lawyer positions. I have a friend who did that as her lean-out job for a few years before retirement. It is actually a lot of work but was somewhat less stressful than the jobs she had before (which were high-level government lawyer jobs). Both trial and appellate courts in my state also have staff attorneys, which in some ways are like permanent law clerks. I think it is hard for a lawyer to get a non-lawyer clerk job.

    5. i don’t know where you work but here in NYS and NYC there are lots of clerk jobs that are permanent, like not specific to a judge, you work in a pool.

    6. The number of clerks that aren’t JD-required (i.e., truly administrative clerks) is pretty local, in my area there have been hiring freezes and when they hire, they want to pay at the very lower end. If you’re interested in clerking, you might think about bk or magistrate law clerk positions at the federal courts.

  6. My periods have been abnormal since restarting again post breastfeeding – spotting between cycles, spotting for days before the period itself, things like that. I made an appointment to speak to my doctor about it but I’m a little concerned they’re just going to tell me to get on birth control pills, which are actually contraindicated for me because of blood clot risk anyway. What questions would you ask and what follow up would you push for? Unfortunately I’m very used to being ignored in the women’s health space and I am entering this cynical and defensive.

      1. We’re all set on BC but I want to make sure there’s nothing wrong that could be overlooked just because I had a baby 18 months ago. Periods restarted 7 months postpartum and were dead normal for three months, then wonky.

    2. FWIW I had weird periods when they restarted after breastfeeding. Things stabilized after about 6 months. I’m not sure how long things have been going on for you. I would ask the doctor if it’s in the bounds of normal, because it sounds like it could be. I would also ask if there are any major bad things it could be and ask them to try to exclude those. I hope all goes well!

    3. That sounds normal. It can take a while for your period to stabilize. What are you thinking is happening you want them to treat?

    4. How old are you?

      If you are nearing or over 40, it could be a normal sign of perimenopause. Which is not to say that it’s not annoying or worrying.

    5. Ignore if this isn’t helpful to you, but my period totally regulated when I started Zepbound (1 year pp, right after quitting BFing).

    6. Just one anecdote, but I have 3 kids. My period took a while to regulate after each kid, so I’m assuming this has gone on for a while for you but if not do keep that in mind. Eventually, my period was pretty normal after my first kid. After my second kid it was like…oh my god. It was so, so heavy for a year. I thought I was bleeding out once. Then I got pregnant again with my 3rd, period stopped. It came back after my 3rd baby and it was seriously so crazy- spotting for months, then nothing (i thought i might have even been pregnant again!!!), then two MONSTER periods where I basically bled on and off and through everything for 2 months. Then…back to normal. And normal ever since (youngest is 9).

    7. Mine never did stabilize. Years later, a PA at my PCP’s office finally took me seriously; turns out I had fibroids that had grown to be the size of a grapefruit.

    8. are you factor 5 leiden by any chance? i am too so everything is a blood clot risk. (did you have to take the shots after labor? Lovenox?) i went to the progesterone-only pills between kids and HATED them. if you’re (hopefully) between kids it’s an option, there are others also. i’m blanking on it now but the girl from schitt’s creek was briefly the spokesperson for some newer form of birth control.

      if you feel like you’re done with kids i’d just get an IUD and be done with it – especially since who knows how long we’ll be able to get those anyway.

    10. You should ask them to test your prolactin. Elevated prolactin from nursing can cause this, and it’s an easy blood test. If they are high, the medication for it is very effective.

  7. When someone recommends a new podcast how do you listen? Oldest first? Pick and choose?

    3. Depends on the content type, how much episode history there is, and if there is a through-line.

    4. I guess this must depend on the kind of podcast you listen to, but for me, I always listen to the newest episodes and then if I really like it I might go back and listen to old episodes on topics I’m most interested in. But most of the podcasts I listen to are at least somewhat timely- politics, sports, tv, movies, etc.

    5. I use Reddit for this. Google Reddit, the name of the podcast, and best episode.

  8. Looking for recommendations for a weighted vest for walking. I am short and size XS so I don’t want anything too wide. Unfortunately my local running store does not carry them.

  9. Anyone purchase an outdoor hot tub in recent years and willing to share some wisdom. Our kids are getting older and we’re reclaiming the backyard from kid space to more of an oasis. A recent trip to Costco and a game of chicken with a Costco hot tub has actually turned into a more feasible conversation.

    We live in a place with seasons, we’re people who are outdoors probably 364 days/year, husband has extensive experience with chemicals so it wouldn’t be an issue, we have a space for it (on a concrete patio), and we’re not worried about the resale value of our house. Ideally, we could sit out there and chill after the kids go to bed and let the kids join us on post-skiing days. Would install an outdoor shower off to the side of the patio as well.

    1. Hi! Currently in this process and similar situation – once our HS age kids outgrew the swingset we have a lot more backyard. Can’t speak to how much we use it yet, but we’re told that it’s relatively low maintenance. The work outside of buying the hot tub was (1) pouring a cement pad or putting pavers down; (2) adding electricity; and (3) for us, getting permits from our village and HOA.
      We purchased a larger (7 person theoretically, but you’d have to REALLY like the other 6 ppl) tub, upper middle level. We are in the Chicago burbs and are spending about $20K on tub and less than $10K on landscaping, electricity, etc. We’re told increase in electric bill should not be substantial, maybe a few hundred dollars per year.

      1. Really appreciate the numbers. We actually did all the pre-work when we did our patio project a number of years ago – we were updating outlets and our contractor suggested that we put in the upgraded electric just in case we wanted to add something (like this) in the future. The part of our patio that this would go on also has an underlayment that we know about and was done to be able to hold this type of weight, so I think we’re good there.

    2. We just bought a house with a hot tub, I like it but I’m not sure I would buy another if we had to replace it. The chemicals can be kind of fussy, and the best way to keep it clean is to shower before and use the same suit every time (without washing) so you’re not inadvertently adding more chemicals. We do use the same suit every time but don’t wash before getting in because we always shower when getting out and that it just too many steps to take on. My husband got frustrated dealing with the chemicals so now we have a monthly hot tub guy, an added expense (but it sounds like you wouldn’t have that!). It is REALLY nice and relaxing to sit there, we try to make it a weekly thing with the kids which they love, and I’m sure after skiing it would be delightful.

      1. The showering thing is something that we considered – hence looking to add an outdoor shower. Thank you for sharing.

    3. We never used ours and they’re a bit of an eyesore. Ended up with rats nesting in it over the winter because it was warm and they destroyed it. We removed and didn’t replace. They’re expensive to keep heated so that’s usually why you don’t use them as much – you have to plan and turn on the heat well ahead of time.

    4. Have you looked into the cost to keep it heated in ski season? And is there a convenient door and restroom nearby?

      1. We’re looking into the overall energy cost which seems to vary quite a bit by model – that’s my husband’s biggest holdup. And yes re: your layout question, we put in a large patio a number of years ago to replace an unused too small deck (thanks to the readers on here who assured me I would not regret going bigger than I thought I needed… You were SO right). There’s already a door and upgraded power and an accessible restroom.

    5. We got one a few years ago! What questions do you have? My kids use it a lot and they’re not even high school age yet. My 5th grader had a “spa and movie night” which included an outdoor movie and a dip in the hot tub on a cool night. We are skiers and often very sore after a long weekend of skiing so we use it a lot in the winter. In the summer, we turn the temp lower and still get a lot of use in the evenings. My husband is a big gym person so will soak in it after a workout several times/week.

      We have a walk-out basement with a shower and the hot tub sits right outside there on the patio.

      1. OO! Okay – this is a lot like us. I am a distance runner and… as I get older things just hurt a little more? I’m currently sitting on a tennis ball to work on a tight muscle, hence today’s question timing…

        What size did you get – we were thinking a 6 person tub? Are you happy with the brand you have? Any features that you love or would skip next time?

        1. We have a weird hybrid that we got right around COVID when parts were getting stuck on ships, we ended up paying like $15k for it at the time when it retailed for $20k+ because it had a different motor or something due to covid issues. It’s a sundance without lounge seating. I think it’s a 6 seater but may technically be 8 (no way 8 adults would get in there). There are 4 deep corner seats and I think 4 theoretical bench seats. It fits roughly 6-7 giggly tweens.

          I’m not sure what features are optional, if you tell me what you are considering i can weigh in! My biggest beef with it is the top is really heavy and hard to open and close because it tends to get saturated. Also, you need to have good stairs to get in/out so factor that in.

    6. We love ours! We have teens and they love it too. It has helped our house become a house they want to hang with their friends at and I really like that. My husband and I also use it a few times a week either with the kids or by ourselves. We have not noticed a huge increase in our electric bill and we keep it heated all the time (we turn it down if we are going to be on vacation but otherwise it stays at the temp we like all the time.) Our local pool/hot tub store has a subscribe and save program and so we get chemicals delivered through them.

      1. Okay, this is part of what I want. I love our block and we are so lucky that we live in a place where we can let our kids ride bikes with their friends around the neighborhoods. We can’t do a pool because it would mean killing a gorgeous old tree to make it work with our lot… but again – any model and are you happy with it?

        And great idea re: Subscribe and save.

        1. I don’t remember what model we have. We bought from an independent dealer who has been great as far as maintenance. We have been happy with it. It was mid-range as far as cost (which 5 years ago was about 12k). It seats 7, but like another poster said that would be a snug 7. It’s more like 5 adults comfortably. My husband is quite tall so we got one where one seat is deeper (I am short and am practically underwater when I try and sit in that one lol.)

    7. I love mine. I love baths but my house doesn’t have a soaking tub or space for one. So the hot tub was a must for me. I considered installing an in ground hot tub as part of a pool renovation (pool is in ground) but decided to stick with the above ground hot tub. We have a real winter here and close our pool every year, but I use the hot tub all winter (probably more than any other time of year). There wasn’t a good way to keep an in ground hot tub open when the in ground pool was closed and I don’t want to pay to heat an entire pool all winter.

      I wouldn’t bother with the outdoor shower. Generally, you won’t be in the hot tub if it’s warm enough to shower outside. But again, I use mine all winter, no way am I showering outside in freezing temperatures!

    8. I would budget the energy cost to keep it heated to the temp you want to use it at. Otherwise, right when you want to pop in for a soak, you’ll have to wait 30 mins+ for it to reach temp.

      1. Fwiw we did this by accident one month and it was 1K extra on our power bill. It is not insignificant.

        1. OP here – I think what seems to be recommended is to get a really well insulated one with a high quality cover. Some manufacturers seem to recommend a baseline temp and then we would turn it up before we get in.

          This makes me think that maybe one with a remotely controllable temp is a nice option… preheat when we’re on our way home from the mountain.

        2. Maybe electricity is cheap where I live (?) but we keep ours heated all the time and have not noticed a big increase in our bill. Nothing close to 1K. I notice a far bigger increase in our bill from running our refrigerated air conditioner in the summer.

    9. We have a Jacuzzi brand I think J200 series at our mountain house. It stays at 80deg and we turn it up on a ski day or long run day to 104deg – it takes not that long to heat up. The energy cost is not terrible – maybe $150/month. The main issue we’ve had is hard well water leaving deposits on the pump and heating elements that damage the equipment. You either need to have hose access to softened water, or there are water truck services to refill when you dump it for cleaning.

      1. This is helpful, thank you! In my mind, I had been thinking it would be $100-200/month in electric… but we also have a fully electric car that we charge exclusively at home and it added less than $100/month to our bill. (Note – hard to tell with prices generally just… going up…)

        We do have access to softened water – again, you know how sometimes your partner does house things and you think ‘why exactly do I need this?’. Yeah, whole house softener.

    10. ooh get one of the $30k hot tubs that has a resistance setting so you can swim laps

      a friend won a “private party” to a hot tub store and so 4 of us got to hang out in a huuuuge hot tub for a while.

      everyone i know who has a hot tub has said it’s a waste of money though…

    11. I have a hot tub at my house in Tahoe. It adds between 200-300 per month to our bill in Winter, and I’m glad I split that with 2 other housemates. It used to be closer to $400, but we got a thicker cover (ours is now about 9 inches). It is VERY PRICY.

  10. How is the quality and fit of Haven clothes? The brand is carried by both Talbots and Ann Taylor.

    1. I have some poplin? oxford cloth? pajamas that are such lovely quality. Maybe nicer than my Brooks Brothers set.

    2. I have a couple of their cashmere sweaters that I lived in this past winter. They are soft, not itchy.

    3. It tends to run a little larger than Talbot sizing. I have had to size down in tops. I don’t think I have any of their pants. When I have bought it, I wait until Talbots does their big sales because it usually applies there too. The things I have were for more variety of winter wfh tops.

  11. I’ve lived in my current city for 20 years. About 13 years ago, I got a sinus infection I couldn’t shake. I would up having an septoplasty and then a scar tissue revision. I also started on allergy shots about 5 years ago. Is it possible my body just is out of warranty? The allergy shots don’t seem to make anything better — could my body just not respond to them? They did a lot of prick testing. I feel that I am always going to be drowning in mucus (both nose and coughing up phlegm). I read “Everything is Tuberculosis” and even though I don’t have that, I wished I could just be sent to the seaside because this is low-key bad and exhausting but not so awful as other chronic illnesses. I’m not sure what will ever move the needle and why the science, good doctors, and a compliant patient aren’t getting the job done.

    1. What were the results of your prick-test?

      It makes a huge difference to know if you are allergic to dust mites, grass pollen, cat dander, mold spores, etc. It doesn’t help to take action against environmental pollen if the trigger is mold in your HVAC system and dust mites in your carpet and bedding, for instance.

      1. HVAC is new. Pollen, mold, pets. All in the shot formulary. Which we tweaked to up the mold effectiveness.

        My body plays poker and just re-raises, it seems.

        1. Do you do anything to mitigate these other than getting shots? Not trying to be patronizing, but asking b/c my mother has similar issues and they are exacerbated because it never dawned on her to do anything else…

          Do you bathe your pets regularly? When did you last have your carpets, drapes, mattresses, pillows, and upholstery cleaned? Have you checked for and remediated any sources of mold in your home? What about your vehicles? Do you wash your hair before bed? Do you minimize your time outdoors when the pollen is heavy, whether by day or by time of day (like, avoid early mornings and avoid right after the rain)? Do you have windows open in your house? Do you know what specific kind of pollen is worse for you and do you know when that kind is heaviest in your area?

    2. I’m currently going through a multi-day full body allergic reaction triggered by switching to a new scent of body wash, so no help here just commiseration!!! Allergies are so frustrating and sometimes so hyper-responsive to the tiniest change in environment.

    3. I was like this when I lived in the SEUS. I moved, and now I’m basically* fine.

      *I still have nonallergic rhinitis and my nose runs a lot no matter what I do, but no more mucus and ipratropium bromide helps but definitely doesn’t stop it.

      I’d think about whether you’re dealing with more than just allergies, like asthma or nonallergic rhinitis? If so, you need to also treat those, though it can be much harder to treat nonallergic rhinitis. Sympathies, because it seems minor but it’s a huge drain on your energy every single day. I feel so much better now that I’m not dealing with it anymore.

    4. Ask your ENT about FESS surgery. I had it as a teenager because I used to get fungal sinus infections (regional issue where I grew up) and it changed my life. It is more effective than a septoplasty. It’s cutting holes in all your sinuses so they can’t get plugged up.

      1. Not a doctor, but for someone who grows scar tissue, that seems to have a high potential of amplifying the problem, if prior septoplasty didn’t help and needed a revision.
        Some days, I lose what count of which version of my nose I’m on.

    5. Are you using any sprays?

      Your issue sounds very similar to mine; I had tonsils and adenoids removed as a kid and deviated septum repair in high school. Over time my breathing and allergies got worse, and after a few years of consults I had a deviated septum repair in 2020 (20 years after the initial surgery). I had scar tissue which required a revision, and still wasn’t 100% after.

      After ENT shopping (where I was treated like a pill seeker bc all these MDs see the history in Epic), I found a dr who prescribed me azelastine, fluticasone, and sublingual allergy pills. I’m nearing the 5 year mark on allergy pills and have seen a huge difference but will be using the sprays forever. I accept I’ll never be 100% but the sprays and pills get me close.

      1. It is funny how different doctors even in the same specialty will rely on different meds (sometimes they even seem to have no familiarity with meds that their colleagues prescribe regularly). I feel like they really need to let people seek second opinions if they’re not going to offer a comparable range of treatment approaches.

    6. Have you looked into SLIT? I thought the allergy shots were pretty limited compared to what’s available sublingually, but your allergy shots sound less limited, so maybe they’re compounded or something fancier already and SLIT has no advantages.

      Does wearing a respirator outdoors make any difference? Did the ENT recommend irrigation? Is it still possible they’re missing mast cell activation that’s happening alongside true allergies, or even a chronic infection?

      Is your immune system totally normal? (When they first checked, they found out that mine was not.)

    7. Are you seeing an allergist or an ENT? I felt like my allergist was better at treating my allergies than the ENT that fixed my deviated septum. I still have some kind of structural issue that I need to have fixed but I’ve improved a lot from immunotherapy. That said, I don’t come up positive for any outdoor pollens, but I feel like I have issues when working in the yard, so I just take a Benadryl on those days.

    8. I have said this here before, but using a saline nasal spray daily has cured my chronic congestion and sinus infections. I don’t even use a neti pot and make it drain out the other nostril (I’d gag) – just a grocery store spray in the morning. I started it while I had a raging sinus infection and it took a couple weeks to see real progress, but after the congestion cleared I haven’t been congested for more than half a day since. That was 2 years ago.

    9. sleeping on a wedge might really help with the mucus – the trick is to get a much fluffier pillow than you might be used to otherwise, at least in the beginning. you can also do the thing where you elevate the bed

      my brother really struggles with sinus issues. i think my family in general is very sensitive to barometric differences.

    10. Unfortunately, no – allergy shots often aren’t successful. And often your sensitivities change with time and season. Didn’t your allergist explain this to you? What other medications/treatments are you doing for your allergies?

      See your allergist.
      Hydrate well.
      Air cleaners all throughout your house.
      Avoid your allergens / mediate.
      Neti pot washes — it is the way.

      Otherwise, you try the trifecta (as mentioned previously):
      Over the counter anti-histamines. The generic of allegra is a good start. And you many need to take it multiple times a day. Let your doctor direct you.
      Nasal sprays – azelastine + fluticasone

      And if mucus is thick, consider adding the generic version of Mucinex.

      Your allergist will talk you through the meds, and usually you start one or two at a time, and see how things go.

  12. I have a J Crew Juliette cardigan that I’ve used as a coat in shoulder seasons past. And then kept on inside depending on the A/C situation. Can anyone with one help me style it for 2026? My old Athleta Pranayama has been donated (COVID suit was that + matching leggings).

    1. I have worn my J Crew old school sweater blazers with wide leg jeans and a tucked-in striped tank recently and gotten compliments. The shoes are difficult as I would normally wear loafers in shoulder season, but my particular pair doesn’t look great with wide leg pants. Almond toe flats with a more pointed vamp work better.

  13. Recs for a hotel in Kansas City? I’m going for a weekend for an event in the suburbs, so I’m relatively agnostic on location (downtown vs. plaza). I’ll just be there for solo time at night and before the event would like to stay somewhere nice. I had used Marriott points to stay at the Raphael a while back (and would be happy to return if that’s the best bet), but now I’ve lost status and can be a hotel free agent. TIA!

        1. That makes it a little tougher. Blue Springs per se doesn’t have a lot of. If you venture out a bit, Independence, MO, has a Stoney Creek that is essentially a series of suites and small houses that gets high praise from my coworkers for weekend getaways.

    3. I liked the Cascade in the Plaza area. It’s a Marriott property, newer and very clean. The Plaza area has great food, shopping, art museum access (and a really nice Corepower yoga).

  14. I’m traveling to Kansas City for a weekend event in the suburbs and would like to stay at a relatively nice hotel in the city. I’m agnostic on location and brand; I’d stayed at the Raphael on the plaza a few years back and would be happy to return if that’s the best bet, but now I’m a hotel free agent and would try something different if there’s a nice one. Any recs appreciated!

  15. I haven’t been to New Orleans for a while, but visited it a lot in my 20s and 30s. I want to take my teens to tour Tulane and Spring Hill (Mobile), mainly so they appreciate the vast variety of places in the U.S. If you had 72 hours mostly in New Orleans to explore with teens who like old buildings, jazz, and walking where would you stay and what are 3-4 places you’d prioritize? Apparently the Jackson Square fog is something to behold, but I think we’ll likely be visiting in June when their finals are done (not ideal for college visits, but a lull in our lives and we are behind).

    1. 100% do a ghost tour in the French Quarter – a fun way to learn some history and see the area. Best at night! Also highly recommend doing a St. Louis Cemetery No. 1 tour (you’re only allowed in with a guided tour).

      1. We did a Ghost Carriage tour in the French Quarter on a whim and it was delightful. If you want to take them to Bourbon Street, I’d recommend around 10am in the morning – the streets will be freshly washed and it will avoid seeing too much with the kids. I love Ayu Bakehouse for a chill start to the day.

    2. Stay in the Garden District near St. Charles Avenue and take the streetcar into the quarter.

    3. I really enjoyed the WWII museum. Plus it’s cool inside, which is a nice break in June.

    4. I typically stay at the Omni in the quarter – the rooms are small but the best room is on the second floor where you can access the interior courtyard to drink your morning coffee. Preservation Hall for Jazz, or anywhere Frenchman Street (I’ve only done this bar hopping, so not sure underage). See any of the St Louis cemeteries with a tour or Metairie cemetery for a stroll without a tour. Midcity Art market on Saturdays. Mardi Gras World is pretty cool. Shopping at the boutiques on Magazine st.

  16. Has anyone purchased and liked a pair of cotton poplin pants? The Jcrew and Leset ones are all over my feed but someone called them expensive scrubs and I can’t unsee it. I’d like an option for summer pants that are a bit crisper than linen and poplin sounded perfect but the cuts either seem to be weirdly pajama pant/scrubs adjacent or barrel legs (ugh).

    2. This must be why I’m leaning into denim. It’s allowed at work. They wash well and don’t look like wrinkly messes or scrubs. Some loosely structured lady jacket or blazer up top. I feel like a mullet. But I’m so comfy

      I do have some cotton chinos in white and navy and they feel less like scrubs because the fabric is thicker and they have a zipper.

    3. no. cotton poplin is the most high maintenance fabric imaginable. It wrinkles instantly and unlike linen doesn’t look “nicely rumpled” when it does.

      1. Yes. Poplin is only crisp when it’s been freshly ironed (and maybe starched!). If you want a more structured pant in a crisp fabric, you’ll likely need a thicker fabric.

    4. The horrible wrinkles aside, that seems like way too light of a fabric for pants you intend to wear outside the home for anything other than very informal activities. Poplin is more of a dress-weight or blouse-weight fabric.

      Have you considered chinos for something a bit more crisp that look like real pants rather than rumpled pajamas?

  17. What are your experiences with starting ADHD medication in adulthood? I am talking to my medical providers too but would love to hear personal experiences. I am 38 and “high functioning” but pay the price for it in other ways.

    1. Diagnosed at almost-39, also high-functioning but paid the price, and then perimenopause made the wheels fall off.

      Meds have been … mixed. I started on a non-stimulant but couldn’t tolerate the side effects (couldn’t sleep or eat), am on XR methylphenidate and it’s okay. My expectations were probably out of whack – so don’t expect a silver bullet, I guess is my advice.

      1. I tried methylphenidate after getting diagnosed at 28. It did nothing for me but make my heart race. Also tried bupropion which also did nothing except make me feel terrible after even a little bit of alcohol.

        1. I sometimes wonder if late diagnosed people are less likely to respond spectacularly to first line meds (though some definitely do!).

          ADHD can involve dopamine, norepinephrine, or even acetylcholine, as far as neurotransmitters go. There’s no way to test what is happening in the brain, so there’s no way currently to avoid some trial and error.

          Sometimes they need to really focus on sleep quality or another associated medical issue (people with ADHD sometimes test as having random deficiencies, whether from eating a little differently or from burning through nutrients at different rates for genetic reasons or just from the ADHD itself, I’m not sure anyone knows).

        2. yesss ritalin did this also, so much heart racing. i haven’t tried anything since but might try vyvanse or guanfacine instead now since my son seems to tolerate those well. (my understanding is that vyvanse is basically the same as ritalin but your body has to do the final step to make it take effect, and that cuts down on a lot of the symptoms people usually associate with ritalin.)

          i think combination therapy is the gold standard now though (where you take both a stimulant and a nonstimulant together but can keep at low doses)

    2. There’s some trial and error, so it helps to just work with a good prescriber. Generally insurance wants something cheap and old to work, and it’s great if it does, but there are often reasons why a lot of people jump through the hoops to get something newer. Jumping through hoops is not always the forte of adults with ADHD, so again a well staffed office can help.

    3. Similarly mixed experience. It has not been a silver bullet on many of the executive functioning-related issues I struggle with, like initiating tasks. However, if I can get myself started, it will help me keep plugging at tasks I find boring, or would have procrastinated or jumped away from out of perfectionism anxiety. In addition to different meds, you might need to play around with extended vs immediate release. I seem to be a slow metabolizer so am finding that a lower dose of IR works better for me than a slightly higher dose of XR. The normal rec would be to take IR 2x per day, but I find if I just take one in the morning, it usually gets me the momentum I need to have a productive work day.

  18. What’s the quality of Universal Standard? It’s a new to me brand but it’s been featured here a few times so I’m curious. Is a top like this formal enough to wear as a shell under a suit in court?

    1. I bought my house while single and I didn’t have that experience at all. Not to say it didn’t cause friction, just not in the way presented in the article.

      I dated several guys who felt like they weren’t good enough for me because I had a nice house with nice furnishings. I think it caused some introspection, but I don’t think it caused them to not want to date me. More like question why I would want to date them. It led to some good heart to hearts.

      In one serious relationship, it became a point of contention when we moved in together. He wanted me to move to his house. There was no way I was going to live in his (dump) house. If I had been renting, I think it would’ve been a harder argument. But because I owned, he relented to moving in with me. BUT then he didn’t want to pay anything because I would be getting equity from his rent and that’s unfair (even though he was renting out his house, thus making a profit and still earning equity, while having no living expenses). The relationship ended for other reasons, but the house issue helped to expose how selfish he was.

      I say if your house makes men show their true colors then that’s a win.

    2. When an article references “women’s whisper networks” I just roll my eyes and move on.

  21. Can we talk about tone in email? When I was in school and a junior associate (2010 graduate), I was told that women make their emails sound unprofessional by using ! and flowery language and couching their opinions with “I think” and so on. I was told to not do that. But when I stripped all of that out of my emails, I was accused of being curt. Finding a balance is something I’ve struggled with throughout my career.

    Now I’m leaning into more flowery emails and I find they are received much better. I acknowledge feelings (I understand how frustrating this is), leave in “I think” and “perhaps/maybe/consider”, include flowery introductions/salutations (I hope you’re doing well, have a nice evening). I don’t use AI to write emails but I probably sound like I do.

    Once someone knows you’re a woman, they will expect you to communicate a certain way. They read a tone into your words. If the point of your written correspondence is to communicate then you want to do that in the most effective way possible, and that means you have to consider the effect of your email on the reader. When women write like men, we come off as rude. That’s unfair and misogynistic but you know what, I need my clients to trust me not to be put off by me.

    Are we still teaching women to write this way, or has that dropped off? Has anyone else had this experience?

    1. No help, but commiseration. A few years ago I was told I don’t self-promote well enough. When I became more direct about my accomplishments I was told I was too aggressive and sounded like I was demanding things. I decided I couldn’t thread this needle. It still frustrates me.

    2. I was told the same thing during the “Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office” era and ignored it because it was so inauthentic to who I am. I think we should be teaching men to be nicer not telling women they should be more abrupt.

      I once had a (male) boss who started his emails withe courteous salutations, said thank you, and was generally nice. The first time I got one of his emails (after having left a job with the boss from the underworld), I sat there looking at it blankly for several moments wondering if he was being sarcastic. I finally figured out that was just the way he was and I would have walked over fire for that man.

      The only rules of that variety I still follow are that I do not apologize for things that are not my fault and there are people I “tell” rather than “ask” because I know they will not take an ask seriously (so it is “please do XYZ by COB tomorrow” vs. “could/would you please do . . .”).

    3. I hear what you’re saying. I think this is more a feature of writing for your audience and for the effect you want. Sometimes my emails are very curt because I want them to be. More often, I use smiley faces, exclamation points, and whatever language fits the mood of the content. So less “writing as a woman” and more “writing to get the answer I need.” So I think we are a little more calculating than we like to admit when choosing how to portray ourselves.

      1. I definitely write to get the answer I need, and appreciate hearing it articulated that way.

        It is always interesting when I see my male colleagues switch tone. One in particular is a rather taciturn individual. Not outright rude, just always a glass-half-empty sort. Unless he is emailing our grandboss (a woman). Then, his emails are chipper, upbeat, and he tosses in exclamation points and sometimes even a smiley face. The first time I saw it I thought his account was hacked because it is so out of character for him.

    4. There’s a difference between being flowery and excitable and being curt. I usually shoot for the middle here.

      Like-
      “Hi Anon! I’m just checking back in because I think leadership might be looking for an update on this, so I wanted to see if you had any questions or if I could be of help? Let me know!”

      “Hi Anon, it’s been awhile since we connected on Project X. Leader Y just asked me for an update, so I wanted to check on where Your Portion is. Please let me know if you need any input from me.”

      “Anon, where are we on Project X. Pls advise asap.”

    5. I feel like email in general has gotten a lot less formal since the advent of texting. I also have leaned into my own style more since I’ve become more senior. I can be direct and stern when I need to be, but that’s not my initial/default demeanor, and I no longer try to fit myself into a narrow box set by now retired male senior partners. I get great results, and I see no reason to change.

    6. I changed the way I wrote to a more “masculine style” and it was necessary for the years I worked in manufacturing. Now I work for an international NGO, and everyone – men and women – writes in a flowery style. I’m having trouble adjusting, but it is nice! I still strip out almost all of my exclamation marks though – I’m not to be trusted with those.

    7. You will go a lot further in your career when you stop thinking about things this way.

      1. This is probably true. Figure out how to excel in your job–don’t spend time inventing imaginary rules and hangups.

          1. Why would t it be a real comment? Seeing things through this kind of lens just holds you back.

          2. The original comment: “can we talk about..?” and “Has anyone else had this experience?” feel like plants–similar to how I feel about “can anyone else relate?”

    8. The correct answer is in the middle and should be tailored to your audience. Engineers like direct, HR likes flowery, etc. know how you want to come across. You don’t have to tailor, but then you will get a reputation along those that prefer different communication styles. Nothing wrong with either approach, I think tailoring gets me better results.

    9. I write warm and professional emails:

      “Good morning, Susan,

      I reviewed the draft of the MSA and my redlines are attached. Of particular note are the changes that impact revenue recognition in Sec. 18. Please review.

      Best regards,

      Alice.”

  22. My car died kind of suddenly on me. I’m self-funding grad school while working full time, so money is tight. I have about $8k non-retirement savings and much of my monthly cash flow is dedicated to tuition.

    I can either buy used (aiming for $8k-$10k, with a sub $200/monthly payment) or my parents have a leased car they’re not really using and would let me “take over” for $205/mo. I hate the idea of leasing (all that money and I don’t own anything), but the guaranteed reliability snd covered maintenance would be nice.

    The normally recommended reliable used cars are even more expensive (Toyota, Honda, Subaru, Mazda), so if I buy used it would have to be a Korean or American brand.

    1. You may have already thought of this – how dead is your car? Would it be worth fixing?

      1. Yeah, exactly my thought. My Toyota prius 2007 recently needed some pricey repairs or was undriveable. But it was many thousands less than another used car these days. So the question is – how dead is your car, really?

    2. I used to be adamant about never leasing, but I’ve loosened up my thoughts about it. If I were you, I’d probably lease now and then buy when I’m out of school. Younger me would have been aghast that I just said that.

      1. +1, also normally against leasing and in favor of buying used. With such a tight budget, I’d go with the option that guarantees no expensive repairs on my dime. I think it’d be hard to get a very reliable used car in that budget.

    4. I don’t think getting a decently reliable used car on that budget is particularly realistic, like that was the realm of 10-15 years ago, so would take over the lease.

      1. Eh you can get <15 year old Toyotas in my area for that budget and I've drive Toyotas that were over 30 years old and still reliable, so could potentially be looking at 15 years of use left.

    5. Have you looked at the used car market? The last time I looked (2022) it was abysmal. Maybe that’s turned around. But I’m not sure your budget is enough.

    6. I’d take over the lease. I’m also usually anti-lease, but a car in your desired price range is likely to need an expensive repair in the near future. There’s also the time and mental energy savings of the lease vs all the legwork of buying a used car.

      And I empathize – we are also in the market for a used car and prices are ridiculous.

    7. I would not buy a used car that cheap. It will cost you many thousands of dollars in repairs. Unless your current car needs a new transmission or something, it’s hard to imagine how it would be any less expensive to buy another old car with high mileage, which is all you will get in that price range, especially one that isn’t a Honda or a Toyota.

      I am opposed to leasing and generally buy a new Toyota with cash about every 10-12 years and drive it into the ground, but in your situation of temporarily limited cash flow I would very seriously consider the lease. I would want to make sure that everything was on the up-and-up from a paperwork and insurance perspective so there wouldn’t be any hassles in case of an accident.

      1. LOL that driving a Toyota for 10 years is driving it into the ground. They’re very reliable cars, meant to go 25-30 years easily. I sold a 25 year old Toyota a few years ago that ran great and the current owners still have it and love it. My husband’s father has a 40 year old Toyota that runs fine. It’s totally your prerogative if you want to get a new car every 10 years, plenty of people do. But driving a Toyota for 10 years is not “driving it into the ground” by any stretch of the imagination.

        1. Cars wear according to mileage not necessarily years driven. A 10 year old car with 300k miles is a great life expectancy for a car.

      2. FWIW, I had a car suddenly die on me: engine, transmission, and radiator all began leaking at the same time, and it needed new struts.

        Repair work was $8k.

    8. I am also anti-lease but my initial vote was to take over your parents’ leased car because I think finding a reliable car in that price range may be too difficult. For me, it would depend on how longer you will be paying for tuition. Leasing the car for now (depending on the length of the lease) may give you time until you complete graduate school and then you can use the $200 plus the amount you no longer pay in tuition to buy a more reliable car.

    9. Hi all – thanks for the input. My 25 year old Honda Civic needs about $4,500 in repairs so it’s time to pull the plug.

    10. I had a good experience purchasing a used car at Mushroom Auto in Havre de Grace MD – they have an older Prius with a new battery in your price range, that would likely deliver another 100K miles if you have a local mechanic that knows Toyotas. There are no hard sales tactics (it’s a side gig for someone who is likely an engineer, he’s friends with the mechanic, and the business is primarily auto repair, that helps an elder care community with cars that are no longer driven). It’s old enough that you’d likely need to buy it outright, but could reduce insurance to more basic levels, and no monthly payment.

      Spouse and I drove clear across the state for a slightly younger Prius, and are happy with it. They do sell some refurbished cars that are more of a gamble with saving-too-much-money, which some reviews address. They don’t really negotiate, but the prices are close to blue book.

      Sharing because my spouse’s Hyundai died, and this place turned out ok, and was a place that my Aunt had success with.

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