Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Herringbone Floral Jacquard Sweater
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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
There are SO many pretty sweaters at Ann Taylor right now. If you’re looking for something beyond your basic, solid knit, look no further.
This herringbone floral number caught my eye first, but I’m also loving this lavender fair isle knit and this bright paisley. Put these in your closet and grab them for the dark mornings when you need a little pick-me-up.
The sweater is $109 at Ann Taylor and comes in sizes XXS-XXL and XXSP-XLP.
Sales of note for 4/17:
- Nordstrom – Beauty savings event, up to 25% off – nice price on Black Honey
- Ann Taylor – Cyber Spring! 50% off everything + free shipping
- Boden – 25% off everything (thru Sun, then 15% off)
- Brooklinen – 25% off sitewide — we have and love these sateen sheets
- Evereve – 1000+ items on sale, including lots from Alex Mill, Michael Stars, Sanctuary, Rails, Xirena, and Z-Supply
- Express – $29 dresses
- J.Crew – 30% off all dresses
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything, and extra 50% off clearance
- Lands' End – 50% off full price styles and 60% off all clearance and sale – lots of ponte dresses come down under $25, and this packable raincoat in gingham is too cute
- Loft – Friends & Family event, 50% off entire purchase + free shipping
- Macy's – 25% off already reduced prices + 15% off beauty & fragrance
- M.M.LaFleur – Spring Sale Event – Buy More, save more! 10% off $250+, 15% off $500+, 20% off $750+, 25% off $1000+ (Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off if you find any exclusions.)
- Sephora – Spring sale! 20%, 15%, or 10% off depending on your membership tier; ends 4/20. Here's everything I recommend in the sale!
- Talbots – Spring sale! 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns
- TOCCIN – Use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off!
- Vivrelle – Looking to own less stuff but still try trends? Use code CORPORETTE for a free month, and borrow high-end designer clothes and bags!
Has anyone flown this week? How bad is it? I know it’s probably unrelated but that cargo plane crash has me really wanting air safety people to start getting paid again.
My parents flew yesterday and said everything was normal and smooth.
My husband flew Sunday and had no problems.
I am likely to cancel a trip next week based on the experience the last few weeks of colleagues who have scrambled to get back home due to TSA delays in the airports I am supposed to travel through. My flight schedule is annoying in normal times and the conference content isn’t worth the potential hassle to me.
Ugh I’m on the fence about canceling a trip next week. NPR reported that if the shutdown is still going next Monday there will be mass cancelations and delays.
Yeah, my trip is supposed to be a quick out and back on Tuesday & Wednesday. I would rather cancel than cross my fingers that I will get there on time to take in the conference and then be able to return in time to participate in my Thursday commitments.
If the shutdown continues, air traffic controllers will miss another paycheck on Monday. I would guess that a lot of them will get “sick,” partially because they no longer even have the money to get to work. But that’s just a guess. It wouldn’t shock me if the major looser options didn’t happen till November 24 – when they miss their fourth paycheck and know it’s a huge travel season.
I think predictions are saying next week and beyond will be worse. Air traffic controllers call out in greater numbers when the second paycheck is on the line. As most Americans would struggle to come up with $400 in an emergency, it’s unreasonable to expect them to work for free (also known as slavery) when they could drive for Uber.
Personally, I hope air travel becomes a nightmare. Since it affects rich people more than poor (SNAP recipients), we might see more pressure to end the shutdown.
I’m very sympathetic to the furloughed workers, but comparing this to slavery is really offensive to actual slaves, of which there are unfortunately still millions in the world.
I see your point, but there isn’t a good form of working for no pay.
Volunteering?
They will (in all likelihood barring a crazy move by DT) be made whole at the end of this. They also have the freedom to leave their jobs for other work. It is nothing like slavery.
I agree it’s nothing like slavery, but they are not made whole. Even if federal workers get back pay, that doesn’t account for the interest they had to pay on credit cards, the late fees they had to pay, and similar impacts from missing paychecks when being forced to work anyways. It’s ridiculous that our country can do this.
What are landlords and mortgage companies and car note companies to do — just staff up to manage all of the likely forgiveness of late fee requests manually? And unwreck people’s credit? Or staff up to repo cars and evictions? Even the first set of costs, which is the right thing to do, isn’t fair to impose.
So it’s fair to impose that cost on federal workers? Who also has no control over the matter and are facing huge stress? Maybe we just don’t force people to work when not paying them.
I didn’t mean to impose the costs on the federal workers, but to point out the spillover harms that no one is accounting for. In the meantime, you get evicted. Then you live in your car, until that gets repossessed. And then you can’t get to the job you still must report to and IDK how you and any kids eat. Call social services. At least they might be at work because they are state employees. And that food — was it inspected at a meat packing plant? Buckle up.
Then don’t work for no pay. You have that choice. Slaves don’t. That’s the difference.
Working involuntarily without pay is slavery. Sure, they could technically quit and just totally screw themselves over, but let’s not pretend that’s a real, non-coerced choice.
Neither is good but there’s a fundamental difference between being stuck with a job because quitting is economically unfeasible for you; and being stuck in a job because if you quit, someone will track you down and physically threaten/beat/kill you. We can say it’s unjust to require fed workers to work without pay *without* it being slavery.
Yup. “They can just leave” is the refrain of people who have always had extra money family or friends who would make sure that them and their families stay fed and housed. If I quit my job with nothing lined up I have 3-6 months before my family is homeless. Most of America is worse off than that.
It absolutely is a real choice in a way that it is not for an actual slave. This is an incredibly offensive and privileged take. They are not going to get beaten or murdered for trying to leave. They are not locked inside their owner’s property with no freedom of movement. No one else has the legal right to control decisions about their bodies.
Truly, this is a horrifyingly privileged and narcissistic take. There is absolutely slavery in the US today, but it mostly takes the form of undocumented women being forced to do labor for no pay under the threat of death, deportation, or rape. One can also argue that prisoners being required to do work for free is also slavery. An air traffic controller not getting paid is simply not slavery.
Not all slaves in the present are going to get beaten for leaving or otherwise face immediate risk of bodily harm. Sometimes it simply is being effectively forced into working for no pay.
There is a world of difference between actually being forced to work for no pay and “effectively” being forced to do so. The latter is not slavery.
The stats on modern slavery generally include people who are effectively being forced to work for no pay.
Please point me to a single human rights organization that would consider this situation slavery.
the term you’re looking for is “volunteer”. Also can you imagine paying for daycare so you could go to “volunteer” for full days 6 days a week?
Federal workers are not volunteers. They were hired to do a job in exchange for pay. The government isn’t living up to their end of the deal. We wouldn’t let a private employer forcing people to work without paying them, so why do we let the government do it?
I’m not saying they are volunteers, I’m saying that’s a better term for the current situation than “slavery.” I agree what’s happening to these workers and their families at the hands of our government is abhorrent.
They can quit. Truly, that is their choice to make freely. That is what any of us in the private sector would do.
Slavery does not involve that choice.
This kind of pedantic arguing with people who agree with you is so counterproductive.
Thank you, 1:20. Stop policing language–there are bigger things at play here. We know what the commenter meant, we don’t have to scold them.
It’s worth scolding someone who thinks that this is tantamount to slavery. Words matter.
It’s really not. You can’t pick every battle.
I don’t! But I am picking this one!
And you should accept that lots of people consider your stance ridiculous. Stick to the issue and don’t go off on a tangent that has no actual meaning and offers no solution except you virtue signaling. Congratulations, you’re better at using language more responsibly than others.
I think it’s ridiculous and self indulgent and narcissistic to describe this as slavery. It’s genuinely stupid. You just have to be really far up your own butthole to think you’re a slave because you miss a paycheck.
Flew Monday/Tuesday this week (MSP-MDW-MSP) and TSA on both ends were incredibly pleasant and the lines very normal. Asked to see a supervisor to find out how to help. He said they are getting plenty of gift cards for places in the airport (Starbucks, etc) but could reallyuse gift cards for gas, groceries, and just plain Visa gift cards. If you are headed to the airport and are so inclined, you have to find a manager to give the cards to – the ones working the lines are not allowed to take them. Still researching how to help air traffic controllers – I checked out their union page and the only help they were asking for their was to contact our elected officials. Would love to donate to a credible source that is getting dollars into impacted employees hands to help with mortgage/rent, food, gas etc if anyone has ideas.
My spouse is a controller, and I can report that folks are sending in lunch/dinner to the buildings, and at least at the facilities where I know people, there is a lot of informal help going on between workers for the folks who are struggling. I’m not sure there’s a good way to get gift cards, etc in to the campuses, because they’re secure, but I sent Spouse with some grocery cards to leave in the break room for folks who need help the other day.
I can say: the biggest help is truly calling your reps and being politely annoying about getting everyone paid. The longer the shut down goes on, the more it costs the government and workers of all kinds, not just controllers.
Instead of assuming all non profits are evil, research the one near you. Each large institution gets scored for how much of the donation actually makes it to the people seeking services.
good non profits need good people in order to effectively carry out their mission. you can’t expect good sustained results if the pay is so low no one can afford to work there.
I fly 2-3 times a week and have been during the shutdown as well. Things have been more or less normal in my experience.
I flew on Saturday and Monday and it was fine. Though the person sitting next to me almost missed the flight bc his initial flight was delayed 3+ hours. Yesterday evening DH had a flight that was super delayed and so he would’ve missed his connection and thus ended up flying home instead of to his meeting. He flies a lot and it’s honestly been bad for a while now. So many delays that have nothing to do with weather. Just pack your patience and be kind.
Thanks — just trying to figure out how to manage a funeral 8 hours away. Maybe that’s now predictable driving distance? Delay makes us miss it.
Right now, with TSA and air traffic controllers not getting paid (and therefore having an increased risk of disruption), 8 hours would be a driving trip to me.
I would definitely drive. If you have to change planes, it’s probably at least a 6-hour trip door to door anyway even without delays.
I would drive that distance even in the absence of a government shutdown. Air travel is never reliable enough to fly the day of an event.
I would fly for that distance personally. I only drive if it’s within about 4-5 hours.
Anyone in DC have a finger in the wind in this? I’d love to think that people were locked in until after the elections yesterday. Maybe movement now? Holiday travel will be a wreck (on top of the existing obvious human toll, maybe now with actual breadlines)?
There already are actual breadlines in DC. The local food bank is doing distributions for federal workers and one of the sites is by me. Every time I’ve driven by when they are open, there is a line down the block.
This administration said they wanted Federal employees to be traumatized, so I don’t anticipate breadlines will be effective.
Don’t sh*t where you eat is apt to remember. I guess they don’t care if DC airspace is safe. We can just have a ground stop forever.
Huh?
OMB Director Russell Vought said, “We want the bureaucrats to be traumatically affected …When they wake up in the morning, we want them to not want to go to work, because they are increasingly viewed as the villains. We want their funding to be shut down … We want to put them in trauma.”
I don’t get what you mean by “don’t anticipate breadlines will be effective.” The breadlines exist. People who work for the federal government are relying on food banks. The breadlines are passing out food.
No one expects that it will change the administrations views. That’s not the goal. The goal is for federal workers who are not getting paid and their families to not starve.
I flew last week and will again this Thursday. Short domestic trips have been fine but my international colleagues have reported insane lines at customs/immigration, even for business class/first class passengers who normally get a ‘skip ahead’ pass.
It’s fine if you have global entry and insane lines at customs w/o global entry are nothing new. We regularly see 2-3 customs hour lines. (Why I think GE is very worth it even for infrequent travelers).
I flew last week and yesterday and got through security in under 5 minutes; however these were smaller int’l airports, not ORD or LGA or IAH.
My flight departing from LGA next week was just canceled.
To where and which airline?
Delta, and it was a direct to a smaller int’l hub.
Long lines at TSA Sunday morning, no line late last night for return flight. Sunday flight was on time, yesterday was delayed 2 hours.
I flew Toronto to NYC on Sunday and home on Monday and it wasn’t bad at all. The usual Air Canada delays, but I didn’t notice any disruptions related to the shutdown. Big kudos to everyone working to keep the planes flying!!
3 hour delay for a SFO–>EWR flight on Friday night, due to delayed aircraft coming from EWR.
I’m looking for gift ideas for my mom who recently bought a hot tub. Are there any accessories or other ideas you would recommend?
Nice towels? A teak mat to step out onto?
for use in cold weather or mild?
What we like in ski rentals- fluffy robes to put on afterward, stable tables nearby to set drinks / snacks on (the height of the hot tub so you don’t have to get yourself halfway out of the water to reach over and grab something from a low height). Good quality plastic glasses / bowls for this purpose, along with a tray or basket for carrying.
You might want to coordinate with her on other items, like if her hot tub did not come with a railing to help get in / out that can be really nice as an add-on. Or a nice doormat for the bottom of the stairs to absorb water.
Towel warming rack!
My mom has “hot tub shoes” that sit by the door so she can put them on when she’s walking out from the house. Maybe a cute pair of Haviana flip flops? Or some comfy OOFOS slides?
Oofos are very slippery when wet! I like them for around the house but wouldn’t wear them post-pool or hot tub
is she a reader? a stocking cap with a light on it.
Very big and fluffy 100% cotton robe to put on after she gets out of the tub. Saves toweling off in the cold, and would warm up nicely on the towel warmer mentioned by the other poster.
+1 to this.
As an alternative to the towel warmer, you could get nice hooks to hang up the robe(s) next to the hot tub. You can get personalized ones on Etsy. (My husband made them for our house.)
Help me shop? We just bought a new house and I’m looking for a runner for our narrow entryway from the garage. Dimensions roughly 6’ x 2’6” or up to 2’10” max. Our house is generally mid century modern. Ideally looking for something washable since it’s going to be a high traffic area. Where should I be looking?? I did skim through ruggable and I thought they were all pretty ugly 😬
Costco. It’s a garage entryway. Function > fashion. Get whatever is somewhat sturdy and cheap.
IKEA also has cheap options here.
Home Depot usually has a good selection of rugs, too.
I found one in similar dimensions on Wayfair a few years back. It does not toss in the washing machine, but I am able to drape it over my porch rail and hose it off to get it clean.
Get a neutral color something from LLBean or Lands End – they won’t be gorgeous but they also won’t look gross immediately.
I would likely go with a Waterhog mat since they hold up so well. They are utilitarian, but have some designs that are better than others. We have a MCM house and have one in their ellipse pattern.
Agree that all Ruggable rugs are ugly, and I say that as someone who had a Ruggable that is now in a dump.
Anyway, Matterly is somewhere different to shop. They are a small’ish business in the US. I have front door mats from them, and they’re great, and I appreciate that they did not come from a company that uses AI to write their product descriptions. (Can you tell I was on Wayfair shopping for lamps last night? Ugh.)
Oooo I’m loving the options at Matterly, thank you!!
I like Rugs dot com for purchases like this.
I would look for an indoor outdoor rug. Annie Selke has a big selection.
I have a ruggable for an entryway. It’s held up well and been washed many times. The dog has taken to vomiting there when he does that occasionally and I’m always thankful he has chosen the ruggable. It is darker than I thought it would be colour wise, but I can live with that.
If you were nervous about roasting a whole turkey for Thanksgiving what would you serve instead?
10 adults. My in laws are loosely kosher, but I highly doubt they would eat a spiral ham.
I’ve never done a full turkey before, and I don’t want to risk messing it up as the primary protein. Unless you have a fail proof recipe to share!
You don’t have to roast the turkey “whole” – you can buy just the parts, like breast or thigh, separately. Also makes it a LOT easier to fit in the oven.
+1 for buying turkey parts
Adding a second protein to the menu helps ease anxiety of botching one. Previously on our table have been salmon, sausages in sauerkraut, ham, etc.
Or you can buy a whole turkey and cut it into parts. I’m doing that this year: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nd1rM3CsoN0
You can buy a pre-cooked turkey! Meat sellers like the Honey Baked Ham Company sell cooked turkeys this time of year. Or, a local restaurant or grocery deli.
But also if you just need encouragement: you can do this. Get a meat thermometer and you won’t go wrong. It’s not that hard!
If you can read instructions, you can make a turkey. Go for it!
Agreed! We aren’t fancy cooks and all our turkeys have been great.
I cooked a turkey breast one year. You could do 2 of those for 10 people. Or get a cooked one from Whole Foods or similar.
I promise the turkey is not as hard as you think! Especially if you’re serving a group of 10. My only other suggestion is ham, but it sounds like that isn’t a good one.
I think turkey tastes weird, I’d just roast 2 chickens in this scenario.
I also dislike turkey and would prefer roast chicken. But find out if your family is on board
I’m also not a fan, and typically roast duck or goose instead. Bonus: they are more forgiving since all that fat keeps thing juicy.
And this is why I outsource the turkey and order it from a restaurant or Whole Foods. Seriously make your life easier and just get someone else to do it.
Unless you know people like dark meat I’d definitely do a roast turkey breast. I’d brine it and then roast with butter/olive oil (if they’re kosher).
Yes on brining. I have only cooked a whole turkey a few times, but each time, I brined it, and it turned out pretty good. I also started it out breast side down, and then flipped it over mid-cooking (by wrapping foil around my oven mitts so the turkey juice wouldn’t get all over them).
The suggestion for a meat thermometer is also key. I use a meat thermometer whenever I cook any kind of meat, and it’s made all of it turn out better.
Roasting a turkey might be the easiest part of Thanksgiving tbh.
+1 – I shove as much compound butter under the skin as possible, use the remainder to slather the skin, shove some herbs and lemons in the cavity and set a timer. The other benefit for a whole turkey is that it needs to rest for a solid 60 minues which gives you plenty of time to get sides in the oven.
They are kosher, so this suggestion is not going to work.
It’s so easy! I was shocked the first time I did it. It’s like the Thanksgiving cheat code…”Oh I’ll take care of the turkey” and people really think you did something lol.
Totally! It’s the easy part.
A turkey is actually shockingly doable! I promise!
Echoing above that it’s not too hard (and I’m not a fantastic cook), but make SURE you defrost early! We did make that mistake the first year I hosted, and ruined the turkey part of dinner.
+1 and give yourself and the turkey about 2 extra hours of potential oven wiggle room – sometimes things do not cook as fast as expected, depending on your oven and the size of the turkey.
Yes. It takes several days to defrost a frozen turkey. Way more than 48 hours.
Just make the turkey – they’re pretty easy to cook. I say this as a vegetarian who doesn’t know how to cook meat, but has managed to cook a whole turkey a couple times for Thanksgiving. I bought the turkey, some kind of brine spice bag thing, and simply followed the instructions with great success.
Buy two or three of the precooked turkey breasts from TJ’s and heat them up.
I don’t like turkey so I’m always the person suggesting alternatives, but I have to admit that it’s really really easy. I’ve made the Smitten Kitchen dry-brined turkey with roasted onions several times and it’s basically been a snap.
But as a turkey hater I’ll suggest some alternatives (which are probably harder than turkey) anyway! Ina Garten’s Sunday rib roast is great. So is this rack of lamb: https://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/mustard-crusted-rack-of-lamb-3645528 There are a million great whole chicken recipes, but some of my favorites are Julia Child’s chicken diablo (you can simplify the steps that seem obvious to simplify) and Alison Roman’s chicken with lemon and dates.
Can one of the other 10 adults either cook the turkey the day before at their house and bring it sliced/ready to go, or talk you through it and then be on Turkey Duty in the flurry before the meal?
People mess up turkey a lot, but they do this by generally winging it and just guessing when it’s done. If you’re someone who follows directions, I think it’s pretty foolproof. It can be annoying if it monopolizes the oven though so there’s still an argument for buying one premade or just doing turkey parts + gravy. One advantage of turkey parts is that you can get more than two legs for the dark meat people.
For me, the “trick” to turkey is figuring out the timing well in advance. Calculate when the turkey will need to go in the oven based on its weight. Work backwards: Ie., If the turkey weighs x, it will need to go in the oven by ___ if we want to carve it at _:00. Then, budget time for what ever prep you need for your method of cooking, and write yourself a note to the effect of “Start turkey prep by _:00. Turkey goes in the oven at _:00.” Then follow that on the day of any you’ll be fine.
And add an extra hour or two. In my experience, you cannot really overcook a turkey, and you can also re-heat if necessary.
Buy a smoked turkey! Premade, and way tastier (in my opinion).
I’m a good cook in general, but have a terrible track record with turkeys. In regular life I never cook a whole bird like that and my inexperience shows. I’ve been getting mine from whole foods, reheat it according to directions, and it’s perfectly fine. Personally, I like the sides more anyway.
I order a pre-cooked turkey and focus on the sides.
It’s so much easier.
This would be my recommendation as well.
The hardest part about cooking a turkey is making sure you leave plenty of time for it to thaw. Other than that, it is straightforward.
I do like using a disposable foil pan inside the real roasting pan or even just on a cookie sheet because it makes cleanup much easier.
Go New York City! Congrats!
And Virginia and New Jersey!
Oh please. Not everyone wants a communist as mayor.
But New Yorkers sure did want a democratic socialist!! Republicans free to run someone other than Curtis Sliwa anytime they want.
Not really. It was about 50 / 50 of the folks that voted.
Which is great, considering NYC did not elect a communist as mayor.
But a kid in high school civics might get better how a city government works and what it can and can’t do. I hope NYC doesn’t get so off the rails that people shift NYC operations to Jersey City or elsewhere. The city is still recovering from COVID and it needs the commuters not to stay away or insist on not RTO.
Huh?
Did a high school kid write this?
It is okay to set goals that would require cooperation with other offices to achieve. I think it’s a little politically illiterate when people hear what a candidate wants to achieve and assume they mean that they’re planning to achieve it by fiat. He’s running to be a mayor, not a monarch, and I think most people do understand that!
I honestly do not think that HE understands that. It’s why I like any state governor running for national office over senators. They have to actually get stuff done. This guy — a bit thin of a resume. Wishing you all the best. NYC is too important of a city to mess up on.
I think we’re doing fine even considering that the current mayor is a cheaply bought tool of the Turkish government who literally cannot help but tell lies every time he speaks and whose most innovative policy was putting trash in a trash can.
Cuomo threatened trump would invade if we dared not to vote for him. I’m sorry but I’m sick of hearing how we would be fine if we’d just bow to the authoritarian. Thats not how this works.
Finally I’m sick of being told that policies that al smith and fdr would have supported somehow equate to communism. You know kids should eat even if they’re poor and billionaires should pay taxes. Heck we had free college for New Yorkers until the 1970s. This isn’t radical; this is what created the middle class everyone likes to reminisce about. Thats not seizing the means of production. I don’t know if people don’t know the difference or think others are too dumb to know the difference.
Here’s what I do know: I do know that economically our lives get harder while the rich get richer under both republicans and the “moderate” dems who love them. So maybe people are ready to try something new (but really old) on a local level.
^ the only complete thought on this thread.
+1
Toughen up, buttercup. That’s how elections work!
if there was a vomit emoji i’d be placing that here. however, congrats NJ and VA – and I love the friendship between those ladies.
i know someone yesterday was saying (and this was also said in the last presidential election), that how do we end up with only these candidates as choices and honestly, being a politician looks like the worst job ever, so i don’t blame people for not wanting to take that on. this is a total change of heart for me (and i am one of those people who has always held people in positions of power to a higher standard…but maybe that is unfair?), but i also find it unsurprising that many politicians are not the most virtuous people. i wonder if almost every president has done something that we would find icky. it must be very lonely in some of these political offices, as there are literally very few people who can relate to you and everything you do is under a microscope.
Moderate dems could have committed to someone who was not Cuomo during the primary. Like Adrienne Adams. She was running, so it was not a question of finding someone. Can’t blame the leftists who got their act together.
I’m not familiar with her, but I’m sure she was too pretty, too unattractive, too old, too young, too nice, too shrill, too unlikeable, didn’t have enough experience, had too much experience, etc. For many guys on the left, there is ALWAYS a reason to support a man over a woman.
This is (too often repeated) nonsense. Two women just won statewide elections.
Right? This is basically just leftist AI slop at this point. No intellectual thought behind it.
I keep thinking we could be on a second successful Garcia term in another dimension.
Co-sign the vomit emoji for NYC.
Any chance city council can help keep him in check or are they even worse?
If you don’t live here, why do you care?
God, if only he could really do the things you people are so afraid of.
He can’t. That’s why there’s the vomit emoji, because he’s going to waste energy spinning New York’s wheels on unrealistic and unaccomplishable goals, and actual New Yorkers are going to suffer.
They are mostly worse.
There are two vomit emojis.
Yes, and congrats New Jersey and Virginia too.
It’s a great day for people who are actually committed to good government! What a fantastic voter turnout in NYC this election.
Huzzah California
Prop 50 passed in a landslide in CA. It is so, so nice to see a sign of life and fight in the Democrats.
Right? It’s a glimmer of hope and optimism.
So delighted out here in So Cal this morning!
Either you genuinely want as many people to be enfranchised as possible or you don’t, and California Democrats revealed that they don’t. They also view disenfranchisement as a valid tool for securing power. It’s a bummer.
No one is enfranchised if blue states continue to play by the rules of touch football while red states play tackle.
++++1
The fact this is backlash to GOP tactics should be noted.
It’s been noted. It’s a little like if Democrats took away coverage of Viagra or vasectomies to protest anti-abortion laws like some people were joking about. I want the party to increase everyone’s access to healthcare (or voting), not to use decreasing access to things like that as a political tool. I cannot believe this is a controversial position.
No, it’s not like that at all. Do you understand how Texas’s redistricting will affect the nation-wide balance of power in the House? Not just within the state of Texas, but across the entire nation. That’s why a similar measure –to counteract Texas’s impact– was done here, and in my view, justified. It’s unfortunate that it had to happen, but perhaps Trump shouldn’t have asked Texas to disenfranchise its voters so that Texas could disenfranchise the rest of the nation.
California’s action wasn’t a protest. It wasn’t revenge. It’s not about “well if you can do it so can I!” It was done to counteract the numerical change in the number of Congressional House seats filled by Republicans Texas was trying to effectuate.
Keep saying that their “bad behavior” doesn’t justify yours and there won’t be a functioning democracy to operate in.
As you know, the situation has changed in the US politically. And its not going back any time soon. Holier than thou will take us down a darker path. Sad but true.
But keep preaching, and stay out of touch.
So you agree with the values, you just think this is the right time to abandon them?
Tell me how that’s worked out for minority parties historically, please. It’s not a winning strategy.
I don’t think you’re paying attention. This was an emergency measure to counteract the power grab by Texas Republicans, and it sunsets after five years.
Paying plenty of attention. I don’t think someone else’s bad behavior justifies mine. Again, either you believe that as many people as possible should be enfranchised or you don’t, and you clearly don’t.
The odds that the Dems let this sunset are zero.
Ok, this is the same anonymous who is rigidly stuck on their high horse. Don’t engage.
Rather be accused of being on a high horse than be comfortable rolling around in the mud with the pigs.
I’d rather fight authoritarianism, even if it means getting down in the dirt, than sit on a sanctimonious pedestal as democracy dies.
“I don’t think someone else’s bad behavior justifies mine. Again, either you believe that as many people as possible should be enfranchised or you don’t, and you clearly don’t.”
If someone comes at me with a knife, I’m using whatever weapon is available to defend myself, and you would too. You wouldn’t sit there and lecture someone about how weapons use is wrong all the time, implying they lack morals if they believe in any exception. You wouldn’t bleed out saying “at least I’m not rolling around in the mud!”
Democracy will die much faster as more people abandon the willingness to fight for its principles just so they can feel like they’re doing something.
“Democracy will die much faster as more people abandon the willingness to fight for its principles just so they can feel like they’re doing something.”
Yeah, no. I think 5 more republican seats in the House is going to do a lot more damage to democracy than a temporary redistricting measure enacted specifically to counteract that power grab. It’s disturbing how many “democrats” are fine with allowing republicans to implement structural advantages that will unfairly cement their power and destroy democratic institutions, as if that is somehow fighting for their “principles.”
Well, I hope this upset poster will do what she says she values and volunteer with her local League of Women Voters to work on securing free and fair elections and protecting our vote.
Lol we’ve got some interesting trolls today.
Not a troll, just someone who actually believe in trying to increase accuracy in representation in all states. I thought that was a common Democratic belief, but clearly it is not.
Accurate representation isn’t achievable if some states are skewing it.
People were talking about the tug of war analogy. If the other side is pulling and yanking hard, dropping the rope isn’t going to achieve fairness.
1:50 – are you on board with getting rid of the electoral college, then? Because winning the presidency with fewer votes certainly doesn’t increase the accuracy of representation.
Yes, absolutely in favor of eliminating the electoral college. Again, that’s a pretty common traditional Democratic position.
In that case, are you on board with keeping democracy on life support long enough that we might actually get rid of the wannabe dictator so we have a chance to abolish the electoral college? Or do you prefer to stand on principle and have the MAGA crowd destroy what is left of things?
I fundamentally disagree that those are the choices on the table.
So what *is* your recommendation, then? And please do put some effort into demonstrating that these other choices you allude to will be effective.
And sadly, sometimes we have to choose the lesser of two evils.
I would argue we already do not have democracy, and maybe never really had it. So your argument lacks substance to my ear. The horse is out of the barn.
You are either very young and naive, or perhaps have a different agenda. I’m starting to think the later.
I don’t think gerrymandering is new, and I don’t think it required a tit for tat response. I think other forms of promoting progressive policies are more likely to be effective without negative consequences down the road.
To point to an example without spending all day here, the response to southern disenfranchisement of black voters was not for northern states to disenfranchise white voters to a proportionate degree. The process used to increase voting rights access in that context involved a lot of tools, nearly all of which could be helpful here and only some of which are being deployed.
Woo-hoo! Amazing to see real turnout in a local election. And amazing to elect a mayor who loves our city!
Hopefully he won’t eff it up too much. Loving it ain’t enough to keep it going. It’s like an old house — lots of $ and realistic expectations are needed.
Yes, yes, every other mayor of New York has deeply hated it. Definitely the case.
It was definitely the case with De Blasio who did everything he could to spend no time in the city he ran.
Remember how excited people were for Eric Adams? That turned out well.
lol nobody was excited for Adams are you kidding
Yesterday the voters across the country sent a message that they want politicians who care about their economic survival and will not just pander to corporations and billionaires. The people of Georgia flipped two Public Service Commission seats in a landslide. It is the first time since 2007. And a county that was +42 for Trump elected Dems to those seats. The PSC is the entity that sets energy prices in the state, and for years it has been burdening taxpayers with paying for special projects of big companies. It is the very same message NYC and VA and NJ residents sent. And then somehow the SCOTUS judges emerged today with a whole new take on presidential power. It was a big deal. But it wasn’t about communism or antiSemitism or even socialism. It’s a righting (or lefting) of the sway, and a good one.
Yeah, those Georgia results are really eye catching. Those politicians deserved to have their hides handed to them.
No one cares about Public Service Commission seats.
Fortunately, there are a lot of “no ones” in this world.
How would you style a sweater dress for 2025? I have a gray sweater dress with silver strands running through it that would work well for the holidays, but I am not feeling the 2021 leggings with it. (Also, if anyone has ideas for concealing a stomach that doesn’t involve wearing spanx, I’m all for it.)
Sheer black tights and tall boots.
I’ve purged sweater dresses from my wardrobe for this reason. I refuse to wear spanx for casual occasions and sweater dresses cling to every lump and bump. If you do want to try to make it work my suggestion would be smoothing tights.
+1 to all of this, plus they are always staticky and half of you is never the right temperature.
I would go with tall boots (cognac, flat or a low block heel), bare knees, and spanx here. I would have said black tights and black suede boots but typing that out feels boring.
I think bare knees is a bad look for most people. Tights are better. Definitely not leggings, though. That’s an athleisure look that is at least a decade out of date.
Agree with the bare knees + boots as not a winner.
I wouldn’t. They’re never flattering.
It’s time for a new holiday outfit. Here’s your permission to shop.
I have a belly and I would never wear a sweater dress because they’re not flattering.
I don’t get the hate for sweater dresses. Sure, the “bodycon” type that are narrower in the legs than in the hips look bad, but there are plenty that are cut differently. A good sweater dress is cute and practical for semi-dressy occasions in cool weather. What exactly is the alternative? There are not a lot of day dresses out there that are appropriate in look or temperature for fall and winter, and I don’t like wearing pants for dressy non-work occasions. The bias-cut skirt + sweater look is trending, but those skirts look much worse on all body types than sweater dresses do.
A regular dress with a coat.
A long sleeved a-line dress? Boden, Tuckernuck, Talbots, etc. all have loads of options.
I’m also a fan of sweater dresses! But not all are created equal. I had a great one that was thick enough and structured well so it wasn’t inappropriately clingy or lumpy, or too body con. I got rid of it because the fabric was starting to look kinda dingy, but miss it.
I think the hate on sweater dresses is related to the lower standards of knitwear. Clothing quality just keeps getting worse and sweaters are a really good example of how they just don’t make things how they used to.
You can also wear a slip. They are so disparaged, but honestly, it’s as smoothing as Spanx because there is just smooth base under the dress. I am waging a campaign to bring them back. My most worn one is a the $20 Jockey version from any department store.
Right?? I don’t get the disdain around here for slips. I have a couple of Jockey half slips that I wear under skirts and dresses all the time – helps with smoothing and static cling.
The biggest problem with slips is that they are difficult to find.
Amazon, Wal-Mart, Kohls, JC Pennys all sell slips in every length imaginable. And there are multiple options for silk if you prefer that (I don’t because they are expensive and harder to launder).
One of my all-time favorite bad takes here was when someone said slips were “frumpy”. First of all, they are underwear. They are not meant to be seen so explain how they are frumpy? Second, tell me you have never seen Cat on a Hot Tin Roof without telling me you have never seen Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.
I think there are people who love to hate on things they saw their mothers or grandmothers wearing. But slips are amazing and solve the problem is dresses and skirts not being lined.
The slips in The Pacific are decidedly un-frumpy!
Honestly, I’m embarrassed that I didn’t even consider this!
Yeah, IDK if I really love this dress anymore, but I’m trying to use what I have and not buy special occasion wear that rarely gets worn. Unfortunately, I was 20 lbs. lighter when I bought it.
I love slips. I’ve been watching a TV show set in the 1940s and it’s a good reminder that slips make dresses hang correctly and not be see-through.
I love sweater dresses but I don’t usually wear very fitted ones. This sounds like what control top tights are designed to do. You could add a control top underwear as well, but the tights should be enough.
Can I just get some opinions – I want to organize a low-key festive get together that is mostly lady socializing and maybe doing some holiday related tasks. In the past, I’ve done like a cookie swap, but I don’t want people to feel like they need to make anything.
I had an idea of a ‘Christmas wrapping party’. Basically, you bring over whatever needs to be wrapped and we hang out and finish our wrapping and socialize. I’ll serve apps and drinks and desserts, but mostly I have all these great lady friends who are from different groups and would get along well and enjoy some just.. relaxing time. Would you go to this? Would it be weird/annoying?
Annoying. I don’t want to haul around my gifts, also space seems like it would be an issue. Why don’t you just host a holiday tea? Easy to outsource tea sandwiches and scones. If you must do a craft, maybe get holiday flowers and let everyone make a small arrangement. Even that sounds like a hassle but better than having people truck their stuff over.
are you providing all the wrapping materials – paper, multiple pairs of scissors & tape dispensers, ribbons, bags, boxes? Do you have a lot of big flat surfaces for people to use? Just thinking about what might make this less fun than it sounds, and having to pack up all my wrapping supplies to bring, along with the gifts, might do that.
I would happily attend just a casual holiday open house rather than needing a “reason” to get together.
Yes, this was my plan – you can bring paper but I have all the supplies here.
I do this every year! Super chill and people love it.
No way. Wrapping gifts takes a ton of space, and I wouldn’t want to have to cart them over to someone else’s house and then home again. Just have a regular party that does not involve chores. You could set out a jigsaw puzzle if you want an activity.
That sounds like a hassle. Turning a party into work is the opposite of relaxing. I like to bake, so I don’t mind cookie swaps too much, but that still does add additional stress and there’s already so much sugar at that time of year that I don’t really want more.
I hate to bake and even I don’t hate a cookie swap. Far preferable to the wrapping idea.
I don’t know. I never participate in cookie swaps. I hate the concept, but present wrapping brings me joy, and I’d love to have a variety of paper, bows, ribbon to choose from, and not just doing it alone at the last minute, losing the scissors, losing the tape, etc. But yeah, hate cookie swaps. hate them.
A holiday or seasonal craft for door hangings or something similar was what the ladies on my street did in the past. Either folks would put $10 or something for the supplies provided or the host could cover the cost (personal preference). Everyone knew ahead of time what they were making. Another idea is to have all the supplies available for everyone to do mason jar cookie recipe kits or decorate holiday cookies (provide cookie boxes or wrappings so they can take them home). For ease of hosting, you could do an ornament swap.
+1 that a wrapping party sounds like a pain. If you MUST do a craft, what about decorating an ornament or something? But please, just have food and booze and don’t make your guests do anything.
How about holiday cards that need to be sealed, addressed, and stamped? But honestly, I might feel a bit self-conscious doing my holiday chores in front of people I don’t know. I’d feel insecure that I was opening myself up to judgment about what gifts I bought or how my photocards turned out, etc. I wouldn’t mind at all if you, my friend, knew those things, but I feel touchy about others commenting about gifts and implicitly calculating the monetary value.
What if you asked people to bring over gifts to donate and you wrapped them together? Lots of places (school, church, etc.) have a list of requested items (like a “giving tree”). Each person could pick a single gift to buy and bring, and you supply the wrapping materials.
I wouldn’t find this fun. I don’t want to have to haul all the presents to another location or socialize when I’m wrapping gifts. And unless you have a massive house, I don’t see how you would have enough space for this — I basically use the whole dinning table when
I’m wrapping gifts. Even if people just wrapped on the floor (which I wouldn’t enjoy), they would be spread out in different rooms.
I would be happy to just go to a casual hangout. No need to make it centered around an activity.
I would do a cookie swap and people can just buy cookies if they don’t want to bake.
I would go but probably wouldn’t bring any presents because I’m a Christmas Eve panic shopper!
Different take here – I would love this so much. I hate/am bad at wrapping gifts, and the idea of pairing a chore with a fun get-together is so appealing to me. I’d be there in a heartbeat!
I would, too! Just make sure you have plenty of space.
I would not want to wrap presents at a party, but I would go if it didn’t seem like it would be weird to show up without them! Could you bill it as a holiday season breather, bring some tasks to do if you like kind of thing?
Ooo – I like this idea. If I went in this direction – would it be crazy to hire somebody to do chair massages for an hour or two? (Context: there is a massage school in town so this is actually shockingly affordable because it’s marketing for their new grads.)
I would be 1000% more interested in attending a chair massage party than a wrapping party
New idea: Holiday Break. Come over and enjoy some relaxing lady time. Bring any holiday projects you need to finish up or just come enjoy some appetizers and lady time. Chair massages will be served.
Please come and socialize… or don’t socialize at all and sit quietly reading and leave feeling refreshed.
Same. But also, there’s a 0% chance I’m bringing over any holiday tasks to do. I want to go to a party, not a chore evening.
Drop the language about bringing tasks to do. Just have a chair massage party.
New idea is good with me. At most I might bring my cards to stuff & stamp envelopes. But if the people at the party aren’t on my card list that would feel weird sooooo I’d probably just come for mingling & massages.
Chair massage party sounds amazing.
I would hate a chair massage!
+1
I’m traveling for the holidays anyway, so tend to bring presents unwrapped in my luggage but I would love a “I have friends I think you’d jam with too; come hang out casually, have some wine, and bring some wrapping/card writing/chores if you’d like” invite. It might be nice to have some “occupy your hands” task available so people aren’t feeling weird if they didn’t bring anything to do – maybe a small ornament craft, or cards for a local nursing home?
I had a similar event one year, homemade soup, seasonal salad, crusty bread, dessert. I bought cheap wine glasses from Ikea and everyone decorated a few with gold and silver paint, cemented on faux gems, etc. This was 20 years ago, and I know that some are still using the glasses for fun & festive drinks. P.S. Spindrift looks fabulous in these glasses, for a non-alcoholic alternative.
This sounds fun!
what if everyone brings over a toy or something that is $20 or $15 or less for a toy drive and you wrap those together? or have supplies for people to make holiday cards for senior citizens?
I’m one of the people who said gift wrapping would be a hassle, but I’d be okay with this. I think most toy donation drives want their gifts unwrapped, though, so they know what they’re getting.
I think it sounds fun. We wrap stocking presents and this sounds like a fun way to get those fussy items out of the way.
Super annoying and also a chance for snobs to show off how much money they spend on gifts for spoiled kids. No thanks.
If you want your friends to meet just throw a regular party!
Another idea, what about a favorite things gift bag? you could make it as cheap or expensive $ limit as you want. Everyone bring something they love and do a gift bag exchange.
This isn’t really on topic, but if anybody is looking for an offbeat party idea: a few years ago my husband had an idea to have a beach party in December. It was really fun — people wore their Hawaiian shirts and we served Mai Tais and tropical snacks and played surf music, and it was a fun break from all Christmas, all the time.
We had a January luau years ago and it was so much fun!
No, I would not like to go to this. Wrapping Christmas presents is melancholy to me because of grief, and a “Christmas wrapping party” would be a reminder of loss, not a fun reason to meet.
I would rather go to a “come lady socialize with me!” party. How about asking people to contribute two favorite holiday songs to your party playlist or nominate their best Christmas movie ever to a “Christmas movie sudden death / knockout cup” game?
How many skills do you all select when filling out job applications on ATS platforms like Workday? Is it better to go with like your strongest 10(?) or more? Any HR folks care to weigh in?
I don’t know if this is the HR-correct thing to do, but to be honest, I just upload my resume, and if they have workday configured to pull out “skills”, I just leave in place whatever it puts. And if it doesn’t recommend anything, I leave it blank.
I do re-paste in my resume bullet points, because no matter how plain my resume formatting is, workday screws it up. I write a real cover letter for each job. Retyping key words from the jd for the “skills” selection with no supporting evidence seems like the least useful use of my time.
I would put my strongest, most relevant skills, and keywords that matched the job description, maybe 10. Tailoring your resume and cover letter is most important. It’s a lot of work but CAN pay off. Good luck!
Weird question but do you all find your electric toothbrush heads get gross inside quickly? I have a lower end Braun electric toothbrush and find it gets gunky inside quickly and not just toothpaste gunk. Like actually icky stuff. My husband and I use the same brush heads but different model toothbrushes and he doesn’t seem to have the same problem.
I’ve tried removing it each time I brush to let it dry, not removing it after brushing, tapping it against a towel to dislodge anything. Nothing seems to really prevent it. I floss before I brush too. I feel like it should last at least 4 months but it doesn’t and I could burn through replacements really fast.
Any thoughts? Do I go back to a manual brush? It almost seems more hygienic.
Yes, and I have the high end one. It makes me mad that I paid a lot for such an obvious design flaw. And it annoys me that my husband doesn’t have the same issue.
I can wash the interior of the head, but even the electric base gets gunky (whyyyy), and I can’t toss that in the dishwasher. Right now I sprayed it down with HOCl and am hoping that will help.
I wipe in down with rubbing alcohol.
Manual all the way here. I cannot get my teeth clean with an electric brush. It misses the weird angles and crevices.
My dentist told me electric brushes are better for people who struggle to brush properly with a manual, but said she doesn’t see a benefit to them otherwise.
That’s surprising. Opposite of what my dentists have said.
I had this problem with a high end version. It started getting black mold almost immediately after I bought it, despite constant cleaning and even though my husband’s right next to mine never did. I switched back to the most basic oral b electric toothbrush and its much better
Mine does, but I wash/scrape it off. For the ick factor, I pour boiling water over it occasionally.
Huh this happens to mine too and my husband’s toothbrush is fine. I’m wondering if women have different mouth bacteria or something.
Get a spray bottle of hyrdogen peroxide. CVS sells them for about $3. I started using them on my invisalign retainers since the ‘cleaning tabs’ irritated my mouth but it works great for killing all sorts of mouth gunk.
I usually spend a couple extra minutes a few times a week rinsing the excess toothpaste and whatever out of the inside of the head and also the handle. I use a q-tip to reach any hard to get areas and it works well.
I’m glad it works, but we shouldn’t have to break out q-tips to compensate for bad design.
LOL
I’m okay with washing things I put in my mouth.
I use Philips sonicare, and have no problems with brush heads.
There is some gunk buildup in the crack between base and head, but that is very easily removed. My first model had some sort of silicone ring that sealed this crack, but I could never be bothered with that.
Yes, you have to clean it. I don’t know why you’d expect you wouldn’t.
Do you rinse it well while it is running / spinning under the running faucet? Kinda messy if you aren’t careful. Then I tap/dry.
I have ones from Costco – Braun/OralB – and have never had your problem. If anything, I forget to change the replacement heads as often as I should.
I wouldn’t go back to a manual brush, as studies have shown that electrics give better results.
Yes! Oral-B io8 and it was over $500 and gets gross very quickly
When did Ann Taylor go full Talbots?
I returned a huge order from AT last month. The fabric was gross cheap garbage, and even if the fabric was nicer the cuts were so strange, like they were designed by someone with a vague idea of how human bodies are shaped but no actual experience clothing them.
Talbots typically has very nice fabrics, Ann Taylor not so much.
They’re owned by the same parent company, so there definitely seems to be some overlap in colors and styles
At times I wonder if they share a design team, or trade back and forth.
Hair help requested. I’ve been sporting a short pixie cut for a decade now, and I’m feeling like I want to do something different. However, I’m not willing to give up the simplicity of wash and go hair most days, and I have a really hard time with hair in my face. Is this an impossible situation or is there some way I could mix it up that doesn’t require growing out my hair for a year+ and looking dumpy all the while?
You could morph it into a different shape of pixie cut by growing it out a bit, cutting it shorter, adding/removing texture, etc. But if you are truly a pixie cut person you won’t like your hair longer, and growing it out all the way will be an exercise in frustration.
I want hair longer than pixie length.
I want my hair out of my face.
I want wash and go hair.
I want to look good during the year when my hair is at an in-between length.
. . . I think you’re going to rank which of these you want MOST.
No idea on the growing it out stage, but google ‘mullet on women’, there are some surprisingly chic versions out there.
Change the color? Grow it out just enough to give you more of the “bixie” style? I hear you. I have short hair and I really do like it and prefer it, but there are times when I get the itch to change it up and really can’t do it quickly.
Talk to your hairstylist about what you’re thinking. You can grow out short styles two ways: Just let it grow and put up with awkward phases until it’s long enough to cut into the shape you want, or get regular cuts while you grow it out to keep it neat and manageable. I grew my hair out from a pixie to a bob years ago with regular cuts. Basically we let the top grow longer while keeping the bottom trimmed. There were still some phases that required clips or headbands, but it wasn’t awful.
I’ve done this several times. Months 2-3 are the worst. After that, the shape gets a lot better if you keep the bottom trimmed.
It seems like the pixie is the perfect cut for you. Do you realize how lucky you are to have found your wash and go hairstyle? Many of us never find this.
Dye it.
why must health insurance be so complicated?DH and I are well educated and I even worked in a job that required me to understand health insurance plans, yet every year, I still find it SO confusing comparing the offerings by each of our employers. there really must be a simpler way
So the shareholders can continue to increase their profits. That’s why it must be this way.
Yes. If it helps, no matter what you choose, the house always wins.
At least you have two plans available to choose from.
The complexity is a feature, not a bug, for the insurers.
There is a simpler way: single payer. But then United, Aetna, Cigna, and the Blues wouldn’t rake in billions in profits.
I’m pretty sure UHC would love to be the single payer.
lol, lmao
but you’re right
Yes; if only we valued our people enough to pay for their healthcare (not insurance, but the actual care). And then all those insurance companies became antiquated relics.
Yeah, universal healthcare isn’t getting anybody’s jet gilded, so we stumble around with the current system.
There’s an even simpler way: make it open market but not tied to employment like life insurance or car insurance. This increases competition for the actual end users, rather than for the companies that offer the plans to the employees, which creates incentives around simplicity and consistency. Employers can compete on other forms of compensation, which are much easier for employees to compare and therefore lets employees make more informed decisions about job transitions. Government subsidies and tax incentives should exist to grease the wheels for populations that need it.
This is in theory what the marketplaces were supposed to do, but I’m arguing that every American should be shopping on the marketplace because employers should not be involved in healthcare and it should not be a “benefit.” This has the benefit of being an interim step that may end up being good enough for all of us, without the nightmare that having single payer healthcare swing between covering birth control and not covering it every four years would be.
Oh, and do away with PBMs.
It’s complex by design, they want you to give up so they make more money. Effff private equity and efffff private healthcare
I was on a UHC site this morning that is prominently displaying a banner saying “We are performing system maintenance on Wednesday, November 5, 2025 from 9:00 p.m. to Thursday, October 9, 2025 1:00 a.m. E.T.”
It’s difficult to have any confidence that these companies can handle our health care when they apparently don’t understand how time works?
yikes.
yikes
Agree. I spent NINETY minutes on the phone with an insurance specialist for my company’s HR department trying to sort out the options.
I was tempted to just stay with my current plan purely for simplicity but it stopped covering one of my meds this year and was also mathematically just the worst possible option. I couldnt bring myself to pay thousands extra to avoid the mental gymnastics of switching.
I love that the Republican talking points are like, “Democrats would force you to give up your health plan!” You mean this complicated, expensive thing that still doesn’t manage to cover anything? I’ll survive.
One tip from me to you: if your employer offers a hospital stay indemnity plan and you’re going to be giving birth next year, sign up. We got about $10k in cash from my hospital stay and the baby’s 2-week NICU stay.
Any tips to get rid of post-nasal drip? I went to the doctor because it was causing a persistent sore throat, and I got a 5-day course of prednisone. During the course, I felt fine, but now that it’s over I’m right back to having a sore throat. I am trying Flonase, but so far it hasn’t made a difference.
Sounds like allergies- I will sing the praises of astepro from the rooftops.
You may want to also consider adding zyrtek- I take it every night and it makes a ton of difference (FYI: it makes me sleepy so I take it before bed, and missing a dose can cause itchiness).
+1 for astepro. It does taste disgusting though, just to warn you.
+2
But look for the cheap generic azelastine. The added benefit of this is that there is evidence it helps prevent COVID and rhinovirus (common cold) infections when you use it!
Eh, the science behind this one is murky and those papers keep popping up on pubpeer and retraction watch.
That said, omfg is it great for allergies.
Nesprin – do explain. Are you a MD/clinical researcher? The study was small (500 adults) and short (followed a couple months), but was promising and clear.
The recent clinical trial using azelastine was the first randomized controlled trial using studying the nasal spray for prevention of viral infections. Maybe you are confusing it with the previous studies showing it decreased viral load in already infected patients?
Neti pot is the only thing that works for me for this (and it does work!)
An atrovent nasal spray can also help quite a bit. You will need to ask your PCP for an rx.
Flonase takes a few weeks to kick in, so it’s worthwhile sticking with it even if you don’t feel a difference yet.
I would see an allergist about allergy testing. I started immunotherapy for this reason.
Paging Cat for eyelash solutions for beach vacation (replied late yesterday). Check out Silly George adhesive cluster lashes. I usually get 5-7 days out of them (leaving on for sleeping, showering and exercise including hot yoga). I also like that I don’t need additional eye makeup.
Thank you! I will check them out.
Has anyone assessed their style using the 3-word method? Was it helpful in streamlining your wardrobe? I want to explore this, but find myself getting stuck trying to find the right descriptive words. Total paralysis by analysis! Do I need to just stop overthinking, grab a glass of wine, and go for it?
IDK what this is.
My challenge is that I will change size suddenly and also buy too many party clothes, so I can easily have a full closet and also nothing to wear.
I feel like “stop overthinking, grab a glass of wine, and go for it” is pretty much the secret to almost everything.
I like you. Thank you for that!
Yes, this. It’s just style. Get started, try it out, see if the words help. If they don’t, swap them out until you find a set that does. I find the words work best if they address the areas you tend to forget to take into account, not the ones you do by instinct and always get right. For example, I don’t have to use “comfortable” as one of my words, because it’s just a given for me. I’m not even drawn to uncomfortable clothing, so there’s no need to articulate it. I do need the word “ease,” because I often forget to build that into an outfit and end up with something too fussy or too structured.
I never considered skipping over the obvious words – great advice!
No but it shouldn’t be so challenging! Picture your dream self – what attributes does she have? What impression does her style give off? Then just write down a few descriptors.
Some you can choose from for example: free-spirited, chic, artsy, elegant, mature, youthful, beachy, severe, playful, kooky, bookish, regal, comfortable, athletic, posh, luxe, corporate, gallery-chic, etc.
My dream self is not a reflection of how I actually live my life, lol.
I used the Colette “Wardrobe architect” wardrobe planning worksheets by Sarai Mitnick a few years back. It’s meant for sewist wanting to make their own clothes, but a super helpful tool to review your style for anybody. The posts are no longer on their site (could be subscription?), but accessible by Waybackmachine.
I found a sewist’s blog that shows how she answered and used the worksheets, and that will show you the process: https://siemachtsewingblog.com/2017/02/wardrobe-architect-personal-style/
Good news: it’s not cancer! Especially since pancreatic cancer was on the radar, I’m breathing a big sigh of relief that life has more to offer than maybe 13/-36 months of suffering before it’s all over. Permission to just dress like a kook and not wait for the right occasion to wear the brocade maxi (office is hella casual / dress for your day)? My days for a while are going to be “elated to not be dying.” More than Athleta Brooklyns seem to be required here.
Thank you for this excellent update! Permission to wear all your favorite stuff without question!
Huge congratulations <3 So happy for you. Live it up!
Hooray!! Permission happily granted!!
Paging Shots!Shots!Shots!.
Even though shots might not be a good idea if pancreatic/digestive issues are on the table, lol.
Late in the day so might repost but, looking for input.
I am 41, spouse is 45. We’ve been together for almost 20 years and have two teenagers. My spouse’s father had cancer and died last spring, and he has also been dealing with medical challenges that have been him unable to exercise the way he used to and caused difficulty sleeping.
Hard to keep track of, but I’d say about a year ago he began to experience ED challenges. Got a prescription for V*agra, but all that means is s*x lasts two minutes. He feels upset and embarrassed about it, and says that he doesn’t really have a s*x drive anymore. His testosterone levels were checked and are normal.
Our s*x life has just become to the best it have ever been prior to this starting. No concerns about cheating. Is this just how it is and time to shift to cuddling or other forms of s*x? It just almost feels like a death of some type and hitting home that we are aging.
As someone who has always had a low drive and could take or leave it (with a strong preference to just leave it), I would definitely explore alternatives that you both find satisfying. My spouse cannot grasp that my drive does not match his and it’s our biggest relationship issue. He thinks I am hiding past trauma or is a sign that I don’t care about him, and it is exhausting trying to get him to understand my point of view that it just seems like an invasive chore that I come to dread when I just freaking did it last week.
Are you sure he isn’t depressed?
Yeah, this feels young to just give up on sex.
I think there’s a high likelihood he is at least mildly depressed. Hoping he’s open to exploring that aspect as well.
The book “coping with erectile dysfunction” was super helpful for my husband after he had some major medical problems, I went through fertility treatments, and we found it hard to bounce back. V***a just gave him a headache and sometimes a nosebleed. The book is written by two PhDs that really know their stuff and offer workable solutions and advice for sex as you get older. (Not saying you are old, but “older” for us meant being in our 30s). It was a great perspective shift for both of us. Happy to say things all seem to be working again most of the time.
Thank you for the recommendation!
Has anyone gone with a reduced frequency on cancer screening? I’m only 45 and had my last one done 5 years ago and my one this year was clean but because of the density they are now recommending yearly. That seems like super frequent for my age and just one risk factor. Is it silly to think of pushing it to more like 18 months by just rescheduling them when I get the appointment times or am I being dumb about this?
I get my colonoscopies quite regularly because I have a strong family history but yearly seems like a lot for mammograms when my main risk factor is dense brea$ts.
Personally, I wouldn’t hesitate to do this. I think there are times when a frequency is recommended because it’s the cleanest, not because it’s exactly the most optimal.
I’m younger than you and my doc said annual screenings are her baseline recommendation regardless of family history or risk factors.
You mean for breast cancer? I thought annual mammograms were standard (in the US) and have always done them annually. Early 40s, no risk of breast cancer.
For paps, my gyn said the current recommendation is every 5 years if you’ve never had a concerning one, so I do that.
*no increased risk of breast cancer, I mean. Like no family history or anything like that. Obviously there’s always some risk.
I guess I don’t understand why you wouldn’t do it. If you have insurance, it’s covered, it’s one appointment every year (ok maybe two for a follow-up), and it is an easy way to catch what can be a very survivable or very devastating illness, depending. It’s uncomfortable but not invasive. Is there another reason you don’t want it, is it triggering in some way for you? It’s hard to feel lumps on your own if you have dense breasts, and imaging keeps getting better.
Canadian so no insurance concerns, I just assumed this frequency was for older people? I don’t have a family history so I wasn’t familiar with guidelines. Seems like this is now the normal frequency based on the comments here and some g00gling I did after posting. It’s bit annoying time wise as life is so busy already with kid stuff but I guess it’s better to have it done.
Maybe it’s different in Canada but in the US every woman I know over the age of 40 gets at least annual mammograms. Some higher risk people get them more often, or they have additional testing like ultrasounds or MRIs.
I do a mammogram every two years, and a breast MRI with/without contrast in between, and then in between those appointments I am getting a breast ultrasound at the 6 month mark.
I am high risk on most scores due to dense tissue and an increased family risk (not genetic, but my mom was diagnosed at age 50). My doctors are ok with this plan, and a radiologist confirmed that this cadence would help discover anything cancerous in time for early treatment.
I wouldn’t for breast cancer. It is an easier one – like colon cancer – that if you catch it early enough you can treat it and cure it.
It is the most common cancer in women. You are aging so your risk of cancer is higher each year, and have dense breasts. With your dense breasts you should actually have additional screening (ultrasound or MRI), and you are already waiting 5 years between scans? It’s your choice but this one seems to be a no brainer to me.
I do hate mammograms though.
I don’t know the stats on breast cancer, but I actually looked them up for colonoscopies with my health profile, and that shaped my decision on how often to get them. The data exists and you should take the time to read it if you’d find it interesting.
A med student friend once said “The no. 1 criterion for developing breast cancer is having breasts.”
Dense breasts are more likely to develop cancer. An acquaintance just got diagnosed, and she is hella active and eats well. There’s no annual pass, no get-out-of-jail-free card. Why not do it for peace of mind?
I go annually because I have dense breasts. This year they found a benign cyst so I had to go back for an ultrasound. It wasn’t anything but the yearly records help with comparison.