Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Proctor Top
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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
Ever since I read the New York Times article about the “unexpected red” design trend (gift link), I feel like red things are popping out at me everywhere I look. This top from Of Mercer isn’t exactly “unexpected” in color, but the pintucks at the waist aren’t something you see every day!
I would wear this with trousers and a sweater blazer for a pulled-together business casual look.
The top is $118 at Of Mercer and comes in sizes XS–XL.
Sales of note for 1/22/25:
- Nordstrom – Cashmere on sale; AllSaints, Free People, Nike, Tory Burch, and Vince up to 60%; beauty deals up to 25% off
- AllSaints – Clearance event, now up to 70% off (some of the best leather jackets!)
- Ann Taylor – All sale dresses $40 (ends 1/23)
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything
- Boden – Clearance, up to 60% off!
- DeMellier – Final reductions now on, free shipping and returns — includes select options like Montreal, Vancouver, and Venice
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; extra 50% off all clearance, plus ELOQUII X kate spade new york collab just dropped
- Everlane – Sale of the year, up to 70% off; new markdowns just added
- J.Crew – Up to 40% off select styles; up to 50% off cashmere
- J.Crew Factory – End of season sale, extra 60-70% off clearance, online only
- Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Semi-Annual Red Door Sale – extra 50% off
I loved yesterday’s discussion on the best TV shows for fashion — what are your favorite movies? I loved loved loved the fashion in I Care a Lot.
The costumes in Belle and The Dutchess were some of my favourites.
Devil Wears Prada!
I think there was a post on here (or elsewhere?) about great fashion movies awhile ago, through which I discovered Down With Love. Fabulous fashion and a really fun movie!
Man From U.N.C.L.E
100% poly nope! As a sewer I am stealing the pintuck detail for future alterations
I love the design of this pick! (But I want it in teal)
I’d buy the hell out of that if that came in my size
It reads to me as trying really hard to be peplum without calling itself that. Not necessarily a negative, but not necessarily a positive either (to me).
I like peplums. They’re a classic style that has been around forever.
Is your objection to its failure to identify as peplum? Or the silhouette itself?
Both actually. Call it what it is. For people who like peplum, it will help them find it, and for people who don’t it will help them avoid it.
And also peplum is a Look, which was super trendy several years ago and was fussy (weirdly long zippers that were hard to zip and very stiff fabrics -necessary to make the peplum stick out – that would always ride up) and never flattering on my short, hip-heavy figure. Maybe this particular pick would be easier to wear because it doesn’t have quite the extremely structured waist of many other peplum tops, but the waist would still hit me in the wrong spot and drape weirdly across my tiny chest.
It’s not quite a peplum.
Yeah, I’d call this a defined empire waist.
I quite like the design, but this is not a pintuck top. It’s a top shaped with pleats.
Pintucks are what you’ll find on a man’s tuxedo shirt. A totally different technique.
I was walking through the nice mall in my city last night. Banana Republic left a year ago and now the Ann Taylor spot is empty. St John and Golden Goose have small stores (the St John one was huge and in a noteable spot earlier, now it is smaller and on a side hallway by NM). The Altared State group now has 3 stores (which I think are aimed at teens). I guess we are moving past workwear where I live. Or everything is workwear.
retailers have themselves to blame for some of this. First they drastically reduced stock. Then going to the store became fruitless bc the selection was infinitely better online, making a trip to the actual store a crapshoot other than casual browsing for fun… and who has time to casually browse for fun other than teens?
Yes. They also stopped carrying outlier sizes in store, even though petite, women’s, etc. are the hardest to fit and benefit the most from the opportunity to try them on.
I cannot understand this strategy. Retailers complain about excessive on-line returns. Guess what? I wouldn’t buy and return stuff it I could just try it on in the store. Before the pandemic even our Nordstrom had ceased to be a viable browsing destination because it had so few styles and was always sold out of most sizes. Stores have basically just become depots for returning on-line orders.
Yeah, I’ve started letting companies know that having a curvy line as an online exclusive gets that brand on my blacklist.
But doesn’t that blacklisting leave you with no where to shop? I have the same issue with petie sizing.
It’s cheaper for a retailer to close physical stores and move the bulk of their business online, too. Fewer pesky employees to pay.
Everything moved online in 2020, and retailers realized it was more profitable to keep it that way rather than pay to maintain retail space, especially when the cost of everything skyrocketed.
I shop second-hand, though, because the quality is falling at the same rate that the prices are rising and I just cannot justify paying retail.
What I hate is that my closet is too formal and yet my Athleta is too casual. And I run cold, so any blouse is going to need a jacket (or I wear a sweater, which I’m tired of after winter). If I am wearing a blouse + pants + jacket . . . I feel like I might as well wear a suit.
Sounds like you’re a good market for more casual jackets other than blazers.
I’ve noticed the same trend of shops closing in the mall.
Rant….Online shopping is a disaster for me. I had my pictures done and they AI’d them so I’m superimposed on some models wearing what is very flattering workwear. I sent the pictures to my personal shoppers at Nordstrom, Neiman Marcus and Saks because I had zero reply from both Nordstrom and Neiman Marcus. Saks, the third email, I got a reply. They pulled together 5-6 options for two looks quickly within my preferred budget which was sent late last night.
I’m not expecting anything crazy in terms of customer service. If these companies want fewer returns, they need to train their staff and provide the service. I’ve ordered 3 tops, two suits and a belt. The lady helping me asked for my measurements, not size, so she could select the best fit.
I have not had a reply yet from either Nordstrom or Neiman Marcus. The lady at Saks helping me was really great. She has been helping me post Covid because all these brands decided women didn’t need workwear as over 50% of women ages 35-50 left the workforce. What these retailers forget is that 50% are still working and need suitable clothing. In Q1 2022 Akris was the only option for me locally here in Dallas. Veronica Beard has made their name with their suit jackets because they have no competition.
Like the men I work with, I much prefer to wear natural fibers. I also don’t mind spending more, buying less. The cost long run works out to be the same. Ann Taylor does have some great options for the price but they don’t last longer than 18 months because of the fabric.
You live in Dallas. Go to Tootsies.
Thank you for this. That place looks great!
Source for “over 50% of women ages 35-50 left the workforce”? I didn’t think it was that high??
https://nwlc.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/03/FINAL-NWLC-Resilient-But-Not-Recovered-3.29.22.pdf
It’s a sobering report. I know amongst my peers it’s far more than 50% that stopped working. It was cheaper to stop working and support their children’s education than pay for private school and childcare/housekeeper.
If one likes some of Talbots products, advantages, at least in my town, are the quality of the staff and being able to drop off items ordered on-line. But the quality of the material is going downhill.
I know we’ve talked about how work style has changed in the past few years. I’m finding myself having shifted from dresses to pants and also wearing a lot more jewel toned tops without pattern + black pants.
One frustration I’m having is that knits look junky after just a couple wears. This new super soft looking poly yarn looks great in store but looks awful even with good care after just a few months. Any good sources for non see through but not bulky sweaters in tall sizes?
I have been loving Hobbs lately. Many of their knits are machine wash & air dry and launder nicely. Bloomie’s carries a lot of it.
I see this also but I hate solid + black as a pairing. I’d love to find some patters or prints that include black so that they seem more intentional with black pants. And current finds like this that you’ve found? I keep an old JC poly blouse because it has colors and black and white and works well with everything. It is a winner and is always in my suitcase for work trips.
I do too. Black cheapens color. Neutrals with black. Color with non-black pants.
I will put in a plug for basically never washing your clothes. :) If they don’t stink and I don’t spill on them, I don’t wash them. My clothes last a really long time as a result.
This and gentle washing go a long way. Doesn’t work for people who sweat constantly and copiously (those PSAs about medications that reduce heat tolerance are no joke), but it can help not to overstuff the washer and to just quit using the dryer.
Yeah, I basically never wash sweaters (I always have a layer under them and am usually just sitting). That said, I really hate all the synthetic sweaters that don’t breathe and make you sweaty and hold on to stink more than natural fibers do.
I don’t mind decent polyester blouses that I throw in the washer (but hang dry) but I just can’t with the plastic sweaters.
Do you wash them before storing for the summer? I always thought moths would eat them if unwashed.
Nope. Have never had moths (hope I didn’t just jinx myself). But most of my sweaters live on an open shelving system in my bedroom.
Moths ate mine.
Live in Midwest.
I was taught always launder before packing away after winter. The moths are attracted to your scent.
OMG I hate sitting next to you on the subway and at conferences. Please clean your clothing.
True. Also, dry shampoo =/= clean hair.
Yessss. Dry shampoo actually makes your hair dirtier and smellier. If it’s dirty, wash it.
So much this. There’s a smell that’s sort of like dirty little kid that I think comes from not washing hair enough. Even if it’s not BO, there’s often a scent that’s just yuck.
Off topic, I have never been a dry shampoo user but I grabbed some in a grocery order the other day because I accidentally over-conditioned my hair with a mask and it felt flat. Dry shampoo did not help. It just gave me gross dirty hair. I must be doing it wrong.
Wow. That sounds harsh. I do understand that you’ve had experiences of sitting next to smelly people on the subway and at conferences. Your message is directed to OP as if you *know* her clothes smell. Kind of a leap, no?
Anon @ 1:21, that’s the point. People who don’t wash their clothes or their hair always think they smell fine and can get away with it, but everyone else notices even if they don’t.
Y’all, you know that you’ll never know the many people who do this who don’t stink, right?
I’m 1:21. Thanks to 1:58 for pointing out the logical fallacy. To clarify, what I’m uncomfortable with is the shaming aspect of the comment at 12:31. We could agree to disagree on many things, but treating each other this way in an anonymous forum is where I personally draw the line.
Same. I gently wash by hand or dry clean sweaters as needed and before storing them for the summer. So no more than 2-3 times a year, and I only own like 5-6 sweaters that I wear on rotation for months. I wear cotton undershirts with short sleeves from Muji under all sweaters so they absorb most of my sweat and deodorant. I drape the sweaters on a chair in the evening when I come home so they air out a bit and fold and put away in the morning when I’m getting dressed. I also sometimes use a handheld steamer for wrinkles and it seems to take away slight smells. Also all my sweaters are wool – mostly merino or cashmere, some with silk or cotton blends. I usually buy one sweater a year and they last forever.
Same!
Long torso on the tall-ish side. J-Crew cashmere in the t-shirt cut. It will NEVER go on sale though in normal colors, so if you like it just buy it now. Also, have had really good luck with Sezane lately which is generally natural fibers (silk, cotton, wool, etc.).
I just don’t buy rayon or poly knits. I’m sure it is possible to find durable yarn blended with those fibers, but it is tough, and I have better luck with 100% cotton or wool. I wear poly crepe fabric a lot, but for knits, I just don’t have good luck with it. I’m open to nylon in a yarn, as it is more or less indestructible, but poly and rayon tend to pill. Cotton does too eventually, but I don’t think it is as noticeable. Cashmere is a very short fiber and is inherently prone to pilling, plus mine always gets moth-eaten, stained, or shrunken, so I usually stick with cheaper fibers.
I think of rayon and viscose as two fabrics that shrink and pull.
My price point for clothing means I’m mostly getting blends. For me, the items that last longest have some amount of cotton and nylon in them. Rayon is hit or miss.
I like rayon fine but you can’t treat it like cotton. You should treat it like silk. Especially woven rayons, but also true for knits.
As we’re staring down the barrel of a Trump GOP nomination, I’m feeling increasingly more anxious about the outcome of 2024 and its aftermath. The right wing establishment seems organized and funded in a way the Dems do not…Project 2025 is especially terrifying and lays out a blueprint for putting into place an authoritarian regime in the US. I live in the echo chamber of an East Coast city, but traveled to the South recently which was a huge wake-up call that a second Trump presidency is a very real possibility. I know the answer for this daily anxiety and dismay is therapy, but is anyone else concerned about the US becoming unrecognizable after the election, either quickly or over time? How are you managing this concern? There’s a pit in my stomach that is not going away.
I feel that any second Trump presidency will be him perpetually in court on something, so who his VP candidate is likely matters a ton (at least Noem has run a state; Vivek hasn’t). His pro-Russia stance is very scary to me.
To quote President Obama on Russia, “The 1980s, they’re now calling to ask for their foreign policy back.”
I’m generally a moderate and hope to see Trump defeated in 2024. I can’t help but think if Trump wins that the loss is squarely at the feet of “progressives”. A moderate Bill Clinton-esque Democrat would win 40+ states against Trump, but instead, Biden went hard left (or at the very least tried to play both sides) on spending, immigration, Covid, crime, Israel, gender, race, and others.
Yah, I don’t understand this pervasive thinking that some super progressive is the ticket to winning. That will galvanize a certain segment of the population, but certainly not the majority. The country as a whole trends conservative (not nut job, but definite more the the center-right than the left)
Bernie was pretty popular among the right leaning never voters that I know. He won a lot of people over with that Joe Rogan interview. Progressives aren’t popular among people who vote, but I genuinely don’t know what would happen if never voters showed up to vote.
Bernie is a rarity. He seems so smart and genuine and holds tight to his beliefs no matter the cost. I never got the sense he was parroting talking points, and although I’m moderate I very much respect him.
But the rest… as an example, Elizabeth Warren was supposedly an expert in banking/finance, but it was clear to so many people in the field that she either a) didn’t know what she was talking about, or b) was using popular talking points to try to drum up the “tax the rich and hate the banks” crowd
Elizabeth Warren is an expert and the bankers just didn’t like what she had to say about consumer protection.
Can you explain how Biden went hard left? Progressives can’t stand him on issues like crime (for investing so much money in policing), COVID (never coming through with promised OSHA protections or hospital acquired infection control policies even while transmission is high), and Israel (the view is that he’s funding genocide), along with other issues like housing (he’s seen as a landlords’ candidate).
Israel is a tricky one…it seems progressive (and even moderate) citizens are staunchly anti the war and US funding of it, but the majority of democratic politicians seem to continue to take a “support Israel no matter what” view. The exceptions being the very far left congresswomen/men (which I acknowledge is not that far compared to the rest of the world), but they would certainly not be winning any national elections
Israel isn’t so much tricky as bizarre. Why take actions that are so unpopular in the USA for a political leader who isn’t even popular in his own country?
@Anon @1:44 – the answer is to take a stand against millennia of anti-Jewish hate and murder and rape.
Anon @3:07, I realize it’s possible that Biden is some kind of true believer like Netanyahu seems to be, but to me it looks like two countries are being dragged into actions that most people don’t want by leaders who don’t care? For ordinary people and children to starve, run out of water, or die in bombings because of millennia of hate crimes committed by other people or by their own oppressors is scary for anyone who is afraid of being oppressed by hateful people.
Progressive / leftists hate Biden to the point of not voting (I know several who will not vote in 2024… Do they not remember what happened when they sat home in 2016?!?!?). I’m a moderate Democrat and I love Biden – I think his policies have wide appeal though I understand concerns about his age (which, as Biden pointed out on Seth Meyers this week, Trump is almost as old as he is).
Yeah I feel like the poor guy can’t win and Democrats are their own worst enemies. The hard left thinks he’s too moderate, some people apparently think he’s gone hard left (?). The reality is he’s done a decent job of running the country. He’s not my favorite but I will vote for him a million times over the alternative and am really worried about his voter base sitting at home pouting while we replay 2016. And the people who aren’t voting Biden because he is too soft on Israel are completely nuts – it’s pretty well known that Trump will do whatever Netanyahou wants. Like if you think it can’t get worse, trust me, it can get a lot worse.
It’s stunning to me some posters here think Biden is hard left. He’s as moderate as they come.
In no way has Biden gone “hard left” on any of the issues you’ve listed.
Agree 1000000%. Biden is not left, much left far left. I’m voting for him because the other option is fascism, but Biden doesn’t track with this progressive’s values at all. He’s absolutely sold out the environmental movement and the support of Israel at all costs is abhorrent.
Biden went hard left? Those words do not mean what you think they do.
We still don’t have single payer healthcare, over 100k people were deported last year, Israel is still shelling Palestine, and the equal rights amendment remains stuck in the 70s.
Hamas is still shelling Israel is what I think you meant to say.
I’m a moderate and I wouldn’t call Biden hard left. He’s to the right of many other leading Democrats on many issues. Progressives hate his stance on many issues, Israel in particular.
I do agree that moderates are more likely to win.
Biden is so far from hard left, you’re delusional.
I’m managing this concern by not thinking about it, but that’s not really a great solution. However if I think about it for even a few minutes, it’s a short path to me being pretty mad at the Dems. I was happy with Biden’s presidency. But Biden would have been a really great President if he chose to be a one-term president. After the Trump insurrection fiasco, the country needs to see a leader give up power with grace and dignity and transition it to the next generation. Instead it feels like a total squandered opportunity to strengthen the party for another generation. It also feels super arrogant of the Dems to assume that that we (me too, I’m a lifelong dem and won’t vote otherwise because of the Supreme Court) can just do the same thing again and everyone will go along with it because Trump is so bad.
But we have other options. Kamala wasn’t a strong candidate before she was VP and being VP did absolutely nothing to strengthen her as a candidate. You cannot convince me that Dems would be this worried if Pete Buttigieg or Gavin Newsom or Gretchen Whitmer were our nominee. Biden could have been a kingmaker and cemented his legacy as a great President and leader of this country, and instead we’re squandering it on the gamble that Trump is just bad. The vibes feel very 2016.
UGHHHH. This is why I don’t think about it.
I’m a dem and would be so much more worried if Buttigieg, Newsom, or Whitmer was the nominee. Buttigieg and Newsom are way to progressive to win nation wide. And unfortunately I still don’t think this country will elect a women president.
I don’t disagree that I would like someone besides Biden, but I have yet to hear of a viable candidate that would be better.
A primary without an incumbent president would given oxygen to viable candidates. The viable candidates who want to be president didn’t try this round because there was no way that they were going to beat a sitting president.
I do think this country would elect a woman president.
But I think the first one will be a Republican.
I agree on both points. It’s really annoying that it will probably be a pro-life Republican I won’t vote for.
Viewing this from abroad, I was shocked by the tepid response to Buttigieg. It seemed like a well educated ex-military religious gay mayor ticked so many boxes. Four years later, it still seems like the dems are their own worst enemy.
Dems are horrible at developing candidates. They squandered Buttigieg’s promise by sticking him in a random Cabinet position and letting him flounder. Dianne Feinstein literally DIED AT WORK because she was unwilling to give up her position.
Buttigieg was the mayor of a city of 100k people for 8 years. To many people (myself included) it seemed like too limited experience to go from that to the presidency.
While being a mayor of a small city is different than being a governor, at least being a mayor means he had executive experience. Traditionally, Presidential candidates with executive experience (governor) are more successful than those with legislative experience (House/Senate).
Speaking of which, as a Pennsylvanian I am excited about the future Shapiro campaign (I’m guessing 2028?), provided all goes well with his term.
Presuming you are talking about 2020, as Buttigieg now has cabinet level experience.
I am a moderate Dem and I love Buttigieg. I thought he struggled because he couldn’t get the support of the far left (people seemingly couldn’t get past his McKinsey days), but now I’m hearing he’s too far left? It makes no sense to me. While I don’t agree with identity politics, I agree with you that he checks many identity boxes on both sides of the aisle.
I was very pro Buttigieg and Biden in 2020, but my state’s primary is late so Biden was my only choice (which I was fine with – being a moderate Dem I also really love Biden). However, my brother left the Republican Party in 2016 over Trump and absolutely HATED Buttigieg and we got in several arguments over my support for him in 2016; the long story short is that my brother could not support him because my brother thought Buttigieg didn’t take a strong enough stance on gun ownership / 2A (my brother is very against gun ownership, as am I but I viewed his stance as being from a pretty rural Midwest state) and issues with racism / the Black community. It just cracks me up that my brother went from a never-Trump Republican to thinking Buttigieg wasn’t progressive enough in 4 years!
I’m a native Hoosier who left the state before Buttigieg was mayor, and long before 2020, but I was also a huge fan of his in 2020. My recollection is the same as yours – the far left folks didn’t think he was progressive enough, and there were general concerns about him being “just a mayor” (as opposed to a reality TV star?).
I thought he had solid ideas and checked a lot of boxes.
I wonder if you are viewing from somewhere with strong social safety nets? In context here, Buttigieg seemed like the face of rich liberal equal opportunity pseudo-meritocracy. “Everything works out great for privileged and high achieving people who apply themselves in school!” Fairly or unfairly, he got associated with code or die and with everyone’s new young highly educated boss who had no clue what they were doing.
I liked him the first time, but did think that perhaps people had a point about his experience level. However now I think that is a lesser argument. And I don’t understand the Buttigieg can be viewed as too progressive for the country, unless you take the fact that he’s gay as too progressive. I think the most progressive thing on his platform was lots of education spending and universal pre-k/daycare funding. I really think that is a progressive issue that would have a lot of crossover appeal.
Buttigieg was a milquetoast mayor. Not suited to lead a nation.
The identity politics aspect didn’t work for Buttigieg. The people who would be impressed by the fact that he’s gay don’t want a nice stable married mainstream person. The people to the center still want an old straight white man.
Are any of these people substantially different from Biden on Israel? Because that’s the main issue threatening his re-election right now
I disagree. I live in middle rural America in a swing state and I think the main issue threatening his election are the moderate swing voters who are worried about his age and capacity to do the job. That is what I hear that again and again and again.
Now Biden has absolutely no space to lose anyone on the left, including those upset about Israel, because the swing voters are unhappy.
Even if Israel never happened, the middle swing voters would still be uneasy and not sure things.
I think anyone who is truly moderate will vote for Biden over Trump; you can’t make the argument about Biden’s age / capacity to do the job / mental capacity and then go ahead and vote for Trump who is also quite old. I could see that argument holding water if Haley got the nomination, but at Biden (81) and Trump (77)’s ages, either one could develop serious issues at anytime*.
*I think Trump already has serious issues, but for the sake of the argument I’ll phrase it this way.
Of course, there are the “moderates” who are conservatives who don’t want to publicly admit to being conservatives and for them, this is the perfect straw man argument.
Re the age concern: I agree that you can’t make that argument and vote for Trump over Biden, but they will definitely stay home and not vote at all.
For the moderate voters that will swing either way: If you’re going to run a “not him” candidate, you have to make sure that your “not him” candidate is without obvious issues. That’s why Biden worked last time and may not work this time.
I’m not isolationist by any means, but I can’t imagine a war on another continent where the U.S. does not have boots on the ground and (hopefully!!!) will not have boots on the ground causing me to sit out an election at all. Most especially sitting out an election between my party and TRUMP.
It’s great that these people can be so ideologically focused that they feel superior enough to sit out an election over this because of human rights. Well, what about the effing human rights of Americans and immigrants here on our soil that will be several impacted with a Republican win (women, the LGBT community, immigrants / migrants, the poor, those who rely on social safety nets, people who will be victims of climate-changed induced disasters… plus plenty of Ukrainian lives). War in Israel or not, people will DIE in American in the now and the near future due to Republican policies. I am liberal, but I cannot stand the liberals who are elite enough to only focus on one population and ignore the suffering of others for the sake of making an ideological point.
Maybe it’s irrational that people feel that sins of omission weigh less heavily than sins of commission, or that they feel the blood will be on their hands if they cast that vote. But people don’t win elections by going only for rational votes.
But this war is basically funded and supported by the US. We are giving Israel its weapons! People aren’t asking the US to isolate and walk away; they are asking Biden to end it, which he could, given our influence. I realize there are complex political games at play here, but this is a genocide and Biden is seen as culpable.
And yes, to many, the actual atrocities being done with our tax dollars can’t be supported, no matter what, especially not in order to prevent theoretical atrocities. Many of these marginalized groups aren’t truly safe under either president, anyway
I don’t want to hear from anyone that they care so much about human rights that they won’t vote for Biden (because of Gaza) while women will die as our reproductive rights are obliterated by the Republicans.
30,000 Palestinians HAVE DIED, with more every day. Women may die according to you. I’m voting Biden, but I see the point of those disgusted by what’s happening in Gaza — and I can’t believe some Dems are being so obtuse as to wave it away and play the “whataboutism” game
100% disagree. I don’t think people are focused on Israel nearly as much as the people on this board and the mid-to-far left who would vote blue no matter what. Not saying it’s right, but I suspect it’s fact given my circles who are from a full spectrum of political leanings.
Far left is not vote blue no matter who, based on my circles
I think for people who voted Biden last time, Israel is a huge issue (progressives, mainly, as moderates will likely still vote for him even if they disapprove of the war). If he loses those votes, mixed with probably lower voter turnout, he loses. He needs to keep all his voters, he’s not swaying too many more over.
+1, why on earth didn’t the Dems spend the last 4ish years getting a young inspiring moderate-ish candidate out there and ready to run. It’s infuriating (and also, didn’t Biden say he would just do one term?!)
I don’t think the answer for daily anxiety and dismay is necessarily therapy in this case, as this is not a you problem. Would we advise people in Russia that they just need therapy? No, we would advise them to organize, to take action, or to leave.
Yes. Good advice.
I was out with my college aged niece this weekend who is very smart and at a top 10 college and asked her if there were tables out at school getting students registered to vote, talking about the election/issues….. She said no. Just demonstrations against Biden over Israel/Gaza.
Even though I’ve talked with her multiple times about the election, she hasn’t registered. I just got my early ballot in the mail, and she didn’t even know we had a primary election soon.
When smart young people, including women of reproductive age who are “liberal” can’t even be bothered to register to vote, it worries me….
My daughter just finished her college search and I was incredibly disheartened by the atmosphere on most of the campuses we visited. The students leading the tours all bragged about all the protests and walkouts and boycotts on their campuses, and how the privileged wealthy students and professors basically all just sat around “doing the work” (whatever that means) and congratulating themselves on their “awareness.” There was zero visibility for voter registration, which was a near-daily thing on campus when I was in college. No talk of how the college was working to equip the students to actually make a difference through their careers. As a criminal justice reform researcher who has dedicated her entire career to social justice, I was frankly disgusted. Fortunately my daughter was also turned off by the self-congratulatory protest environments and chose a school where she will actually learn to think for herself and to do good in the world.
That is ridiculous. Protest against the government but don’t vote? Just sit down then!
I know every generation says this about the next generation, but I do not understand these kids (and I’m only 30!). In talking with younger cousins, friends’ siblings, and coworkers, it seems like the Gen Zers I know (early 20s) are basically unwilling to vote for anyone except their 100% perfect candidate. They seem to have no desire to compromise or choose the lesser of two bad options. They’re very ideologically focused, and won’t entertain voting for those who don’t pass their ideological tests. It seems so short sighted and naive to me; I never expect to get a “perfect” candidate but will vote for whoever is the “good enough” candidate for me.
They also don’t seem to understand the bigger picture. Like that we need someone with wide appeal, so that’s more likely to be a moderate so we can get votes across a spectrum of voters. If your perfect candidate is far left, they aren’t going to have wide appeal with moderates and “other types” of liberals, let alone never Trump Republicans who might jump ship. I feel like they haven’t lived enough to understand that sucking it up and voting for a moderate democrat like Biden is better than not voting and ending up with Trump… They also don’t seem to have the experience to realize that Biden can only do so much due to the other branches of government. We luckily have checks and balances, but as a result one man can only do so much. Even if he wanted to, he can’t snap his fingers and pass XYZ legislation.
Finally, they don’t understand that policies that have wide-appeal in their circles don’t have wide-appeal among all liberals, let alone all Americans. For example, while student loan forgiveness is great I think it’s more pressing to address the absurd (and still rising, somehow!) cost of college. I’m young, I had loans that were luckily manageable ($35k), I get that paying $350/mo sucks. However, my older relatives (both liberal and conservative) are very much of the mindset of “you took the loans out, you pay them back”. And, maybe you have to take a job you don’t love or get a side gig (I babysat 3x a week for 2 years after college to have extra money to pay down my loans) or adjust your expectations (roommates, buying from Walmart and Goodwill, skipping nights out, whatever) to pay back loans. Generations have done things like that either to pay for college / to pay off college / to get established in your 20s.
I know that anecdata isn’t perfect, but the very socially-conscious Gen Zers I know are really not selling their case well to people my age, let alone my parents’ age!
You sound out of touch. People would be DELIGHTED to pay back what they borrowed. The crisis is about accumulated interest.
So when I was in school the rates were between 3-5% and now it looks like it’s 5.5%. I think legislation to cap the percentage of federal loans is great, but once again I still think the big issue is the cost of school and there needs to be legislation about that.
I chose the cheapest option for me (which was a private school that offered a lot of aid). It was also a well-known private school with a good reputation that opened doors for me. I know plenty of people who made their choices to get the most bang for their buck (my brother went to community college and then transferred to a local 4 year to finish his degree and lived at home the whole time; a cousin did 4 years of the local state school + living at home even though they got into a “better” school that was more expensive, another friend did ROTC). But, I also know people who chose expensive private schools with not great ratings then chose careers where they need a masters and once again went private and it’s mind boggling. If you’re in a situation in which private loans are your only option, IMO you need to choose the cheapest option – if that’s where you get the most aid or community college + cheapest local school, whatever it is.
Unless you’re downright wealthy, almost everyone I know chose their school for financial reasons instead of more “fun” ones.
I feel for the people with 6 figures of loans with high rates but also WTF were you thinking? I know you should’t pin these decisions on 18 year olds, but also some things just don’t make sense.
I’m very, very slowly getting my Masters. I looked at the schools near me with programs I wanted to study and chose mine because it was the cheapest. I don’t necessarily love it, but it is a means to an ends. I’m going slowly because each class is $4,200. I am paying out of pocket, so I can only afford two classes a year. I’m not really contributing to saving right now, everything I put away goes to tuition. But, I’m graduating without debt. Full time students graduate from my program in a year, part time in 2-2.5 years, but it will take me 4 years. I don’t love dragging it out, it’d be nice to finish “on time” in 2ish years, but that’s not the financial reality for me.
People I know just weren’t expecting life to intervene and for interest to pile up before they could get back on their feet. They’d have been fine paying back the amount they borrowed and the interest they’d anticipated if everything had gone according to plan.
I very much agree that the costs need to be reined in.
Even if they win, Biden shows no signs of becoming a popular president, and Project 2025 isn’t likely to just go away. I honestly feel both parties are complicit here, and it’s wild to me that we’re going to sacrifice this much in the US along with decades of foreign policy all for what, but here we are.
I live in the south and honestly am ignoring the news. I vote in every election, donate to causes I care about, and talk to friends and family members about who I vote for and why. It feels like there’s not much I can do beyond this, so I do the best I can not to think about it.
Same. Also in the south. Also doing what I can in my own orbit and otherwise trying not to dwell.
I feel like we’re in a race to the bottom.
My husband thinks there is a very real possibility he will be in jail before the election. I don’t think we’re that lucky, but I do think the Republican focus on outlawing abortion is a gift to Dems that might allow Biden to squeak by. Can you channel some of your anxiety into activism/volunteering (e.g., get out the vote in swing states, donating $)? That would be the most productive option.
I don’t know about jail, but I feel like there is a way better than 0% chance that at least one of them won’t make it to election day.
There’s no way he’ll be anywhere near a jail cell before an election. He’ll be appealing every aspect of every minor procedural ruling for every aspect of all his cases until he dies.
Could he run out of $? I feel like he’s a troubled business — should now have to pay cash vs being extended credit (for ads, ad buys, staff, etc.). Maybe that will take the wind out of his sails a bit. Not sure how the rank and file supporters will pony up enough $ for this. It’s clear that Melania doesn’t want a second term (unless it gets him away from the house and she won’t move to the White House). Not sure she wanted a first term.
He really doesn’t have to rely on rank & file supporters? Whole industries still support him because they like deregulation.
Yes, money will appear, miraculously. Huge donations will come into the Republican national committee, and get siphoned to Trump legal fees. It will happen.
He will appeal and appeal and no way wind up in jail before the election.
And if he wins, everything will pause, and he will end every investigation he can.
I feel like Democrats have recently begun showing some signs of brain activity in terms of appealing to voters. They were going HARD on “people with a uterus” and “Latinx” early in Biden’s term and that’s mostly dropped now except for from a few hard-liners. Biden is hammering the economy instead. I don’t know if it’s enough but they’d have to be real idiots to mess up the abortion issue on a silver platter situation.
Telling voters that the economy is great because they’re paying higher rents, higher healthcare premiums, and higher prices for foods isn’t the winning strategy they think it is.
I agree, but other aspects (like calling out manufacturers for shrinkflation and considering expansions of tax credits for working families) are more popular.
People are also worried about private equity takeovers (this affects a lot of working people whether it’s their apartment complex, their employer, their kid’s daycare or their mom’s care home that is bought out and bled dry).
Yeah the PE take overs is something I’m so scared of I pretty much have to burry my head in the sand and tune out all news of it. I truly think its evil what these companies are doing.
I agree with this completely. They have to change that mantra as it is totally alienating… even to me…. as I struggle with higher rents and crazy high medical expenses. Only the very successful, upper classes are protected from these crazy expenses of housing/college/healthcare/childcare/aging costs. And food costs…. even modest changes are really felt by folks with low income. As we know, if you are worried about food and housing, you do not have the luxury to worry about many of the issues that Democrats (and Republicans….) like to push to the forefront.
Yeah I like Biden a lot but touting the economy is NOT the way to go to sway people. My friend circle is well educated, late 20s / early 30s, and doing well but not super high earners (80-100k in Philly) and we are ALL feeling the crunch financially, both in our day to day (rent is high, groceries are high) and long term (no one feels like they can buy a house anytime soon). My friends are all liberal (ranging from moderates to very far left) and we’re all obviously “blue no matter who” but are stressed.
My family / family friends are skilled blue collar and pink collar (in the trades, teachers, nurses) and are really, really feeling the crunch. They’re more conservative (ranging from pretty conservative but never Trump to moderate democrats) and are furious over the state of the economy. This crowd is mid 50s – mid 70s and are very concerned about the rising cost of living and their ability to retire. My parents have become defacto vegetarians most days of the week because meat / chicken is too expensive (and they’ve been Aldi only shoppers for years already). They’ve acknowledged that they’re only doing okay because they bought their houses long ago and either already paid off mortgages or they locked in reasonable mortgages (because the houses they bought for 150k 30 years ago are now worth 600k). My parents keep the house at 64.
I know this isn’t Biden’s fault and that there are many, many factors that impact the economy; however, touting a “strong economy” is not going to appeal to people when the costs of day to day living are getting higher and higher.
Plus one
I’m more conservative than this board on some issues, but I’m thoroughly a Never-Trumper but… every WSJ/NPR/NYTimes article stuffed full of analysts being Absolutely Baffled ™that the bozos “just don’t understand” why the economy is actually good (inflation is increasing at a lower rate! Lots of companies can’t fill all of their zero-guaranteed-hour, low-pay, bathroom-breaks-monitored-by-AI roles! You have health insurance (that you can’t afford to use)!) absolutely activates the “you know what, set that swamp on fire” part of my brain. And what the Democrats have to offer is more of “well, what if we Spend Money on the problem”. Problem gets worse, let’s spend More Money. No actual willingness to hold themselves to a result.
I’m blue no matter who, but I have a good job, I paid off my student loans, I don’t live extravagantly (my clothes come from Old Navy, my groceries come from Aldi, my car is a 21 year old Honda, I don’t really travel, my hobbies are cheap, I cook at least 90% of my meals) and I’m more or less living paycheck to paycheck. My salary has almost doubled over the last eight years and yet I’m still living like I’m a 22 year old making 45k.
In my large SE city, the thing that is causing frustration amongst Biden voters is immigration. He needs to get the party in line around a clear stance that the current situation is unacceptable. It feels like we’re not able to control our border, and like an entire wing of the Democratic party doesn’t want to. That really turns off a huge segment of the electorate, including reliable Democratic constituencies. Those people won’t vote Trump, but they may not vote at all.
We are pursuing dual citizenship thanks to my husband’s grandmother; worried particularly about my daughter so giving her the gift of an EU passport.
What is the best way for high schoolers to prep for SATs or ACTs? There’s been an explosion of resources beyond books and practice tests. Now there are dozens of online prep companies, one on one virtual tutors, software, etc. Do any parents who have kids who recently went through test prep have any advice or recommendations on what is worth the $$? Thanks.
I used one of the prep books (maybe Kaplan?) from the library and got a 35. My parents were not involved at all in my prep…I think you should step back and let your kid lead on this.
Similarly, I just glanced at a book and got a 1540. But I do think in person classes are likely to have more impact on your score. When I went to my fancy private college, most people there had taken a paid prep course. And this was 20+ years ago. So if you want to run the elite college rat race (and I totally get why people don’t want to), an in person course is probably the best option.
We aren’t rat racers but I feel that grade inflation is pretty rampant and counselor letters are either a joke or insanely over-crafted, so what else is there? In it just to qualify for any honors programs or merit aid, not for Harvard.
Throwing this out there: it’s worthwhile to gun for a high score even if you don’t want to do the rat race. That opens doors to merit aid, which is next to impossible to get, fellowships, or even in-state admissions at schools like UCLA. (It’s a wonderful school; I would reserve “elite school rat race” for HYPSM, Chicago, etc., but am willing for people more familiar with California state admissions to jump in!)
I made this comment and fwiw I definitely consider UCLA an elite school. Lately it seems like it’s harder to get in there than some Ivies!
But point taken that a high score can open the doors to merit aid at lower ranked schools even if you’re not aiming for top school.
UCLA and the other UCs don’t accept SAT scores.
My daughter opted out of the rat race and her SAT scores and grades got her a nice merit scholarship to an excellent SLAC where she will be extremely happy and get a fantastic education.
I wouldn’t call going to a top tier SLAC opting out of the rat race. They’re still very competitive even if they’re not Harvard.
The ones that give merit aid are not in the same realm of competitiveness as the ones that don’t.
Following. I did fine with the books as a teen but one kiddo would do better with a human or even a virtual human.
Depends on your kid. My parents signed me up for an in-person class but since I was ahead of the other kids and have always learned well from reading & examples in writing, I did better with the books so I could focus only on the ‘hard’ problems at my own pace.
Is the ACT like the SAT in that there are test taking tricks or skills to master?
Yes
As an undiagnosed AuDHD-er I did best with in-person test prep. I needed someone to explicitly guide me through the ‘trick’ questions and how to decode them because I would continuously overthink them. The in person sessions also helped keep me accountable for studying/doing the tests, there was no way in hell I’d have gotten through it otherwise as it was SO tedious and boring.
I’d recommend having your teen take a practice exam “cold” to gauge what they feel most confident in.
Then have your teen check in with teachers in key subjects (math & english) about extra practice in areas where they struggled.
If your child hasn’t had pre-calc yet, they might need hands-on tutoring as mire basic trigonometry is covered.
Following with interest because I’m in the same boat. My son is taking the PSAT in 2 weeks and I figured once those results are in, it will be a good indicator of what time of prep he will need.
Where I grew up, virtually every kid did in person tutoring (mostly one on one, but some did small group). I was taking the SAT about 12-14 years ago, so this isn’t a trend of the super “recent” helicopter parenting. These were expensive, and as one of the few middle class kids at my school I know I was able to get some sort of discount or scholarship for these classes. The going rate back then was like $150+ an hour, so I’m sure it’s close to doubled now…
My parents were extremely hands off on the whole college process for me (I was extremely independent; they were more hands on but still relaxed with my siblings)- they took me to tour schools that I asked about and paid for applications but I pretty much did everything on my own: scheduled when I’d take the SATs and register for them, they never once saw my application or my college essay, they knew a few of the schools I applied to but I don’t think they even knew the whole list.
I’m sharing this information to show that they really weren’t over involved with the college process, but they still put me in private tutoring. I’m 80% sure they’re the ones who suggested it after I did fine but not amazingly on my first SAT. I definitely wanted to do the private tutoring, but I”m pretty sure I didn’t ask for it because I knew it was too expensive.
We are letting our kid take the PSAT cold to see how he does, and then he’ll get group plus 1:1 tutoring for the SAT focusing on the math section (he’s got dyscalculia and doing math at speed is not easy for him).
My CO ’16 and ’22 used PrepScholar. It is not cheap, but it is very, very good. One of them is a very good student, and the other is consistently middle-of-the-pack on standardized tests, but they both got the scores they needed and wanted and that I expected them to get.
Other than PrepScholar, my tip if you have a kid who struggles with standardized testing, is to target schools that superscore their SAT and ACT, and have her focus on 2 sub-parts in one sitting and the other 2 in the other. We accidentally did that with my less-gifted tester on the ACT, and it worked beautifully.
Please consider disregarding the experience of anyone who took the tests in the 80s or 90s. What worked then when everyone took it once and cold or with only minimal prep might not now when the competition is going to 8 week SAT boot camp in the summer.
PrepScholar is pretty good but works only if the student is not resistant. As someone who does very well unstandardized tests and has taught SAT prep, I actually think some of the books PrepScholar recommends are better. The main things to look for in a program are:
– Uses real SAT questions for practice and explains exactly why each answer choice is right or wrong. Do not rely on Khan Academy for this; the explanations are not adequate.
– Has a good substantive review of the math concepts for kids who may not have used them in years.
– Has a good substantive review of the grammar concepts for kids who were probably never taught grammar at all.
In addition to test prep materials, it will really help if your child practices reading high-quality long-form journalism in magazines like the Atlantic, the New Yorker, and Scientific American. The reading they do in school, if any, will not prepare them for the reading comprehension section of the SAT.
I recommend tons of practice questions. That helped me a ton on the GRE and I wish I had done it for the math portion of the SAT. Doing the actual questions is way more valuable than reading about strategy in a vague sense.
my dad who was born in the late 40s to immigrant parents with little money took sat prep classes from Stanley Kaplan himself in his home in brooklyn before he made it big. Tutoring and classes have been around for a long time. this is not new.
I took the psat and got a 1280. I got a book and practiced like maybe twice, took the SAT and got a 1400. I took it one more time and also got a 1400 but with a different score breakdown and since they take the best of each my official score was 1460. Called it done.
Some schools take the best of each, but some don’t.
The main method seems to be for the parents to shell out money for books or PrepScholar and the kids to ignore it.
So the biggest things an in person class will hammer on:
Practice tests to get used to stress+ time management in the test
Read through all the test and then go back and do what you can do easily.
Vocab word
If you can eliminate a wrong answer or two guessing is a good strategy, if not, skip.
Often times graphs+ figures are drawn to scale- see if you can estimate areas if you can’t figure out the equations
A friend of mine from law school does ACT prep classes online. She’s work with my three kids. One kid’s score went up by 3, the next by 2, and the next up by 5. I think she met with each kid about 8-10 times. Fewer meetings would probably work as well. The later meetings are mostly for accountability. It really helped with their confidence in test taking generally as well. She meets with them weekly and has individualized study plans for them and teaches them a bunch of strategies. Super easy to schedule and work with. She’s been doing this for years. Burner email at newmexicojones at yahoo if you’d like her contact info.
Random question: has anyone hiked any of the Haw River trail near Greensboro? We were trying to tie that in to a trip to Greensboro to see the original Woolworth’s. From reading, Greensboro had a Quaker presence (e.g., Guilford College) and the Haw River was used by escaped enslaved people fleeing north. I’m not sure how spring + rain + river might make part of that trail close and if it is realistically close enough to Greensboro to do both on the same trip (long weekend).
It’s definitely close enough to do both in a weekend (especially a long weekend). I would anticipate that unless there is a significant rain event, you should be fine. It may be muddy, but it’ll be do-able. That said, you’ll likely be very underwhelmed by the Woolworth’s. I would look for some other activities in the area to check out (Guilford Courthouse battlefield, the science center, the NC Zoo…).
Hanging Rock is only an hour from Greensboro and probably a much more interesting hike if you want other activity ideas (I haven’t done Haw River)
Hanging Rock is cool (and has some revolutionary war history associated with it), but it’s completely different from Haw River. There’s really no need to drive an hour for interesting trails. I would only do Hanging Rock if I had to go swimming.
OP here. Hanging Rock is cool but I really wanted to focus on civil rights and the underground railroad in Greensboro on this trip. So, location-specific and with a specific historical component. I’ve been to Greensboro before but not the Haw River trail (which is pretty long) in Greensboro. Thanks all for the Guilford College tip — that seems to be the goldmine I was looking for. Now . . . do I camp? Looking for a safe group site for an all-female group. And any good restaurant recommendations :)
The most recognized restaurant last I checked is ‘Cille and ‘Scoe; you should easily be able to tell from the menu whether you’d like it. It’s right downtown.
I’ve not tried the brunch at Double Oaks, but the coffee is great.
There are a lot of good burgers in town (Porterhouse, Hops, and Big Burger Spot all have their own following, but you kind of have to be a burger person who is also in the mood for a burger.)
The other thing Greensboro is known for is authentic Vietnamese. Any of the popular places is good.
I don’t know the answer about the rain, but the trail is not far from the Woolworth’s museum, and traffic isn’t bad (well, not bad in the sense of slow anyway).
If the weather doesn’t feel favorable to hiking, there’s also an underground railroad tradition at the Guilford College woods. I think they’ve discouraged apocrypha from developing about any particular route or trail marks, but there’s a tree that is old enough that it would have been there at the time that people visit (maybe you read about that already). There are also some historic cemeteries downtown, though I feel some of them could use more memorials or markers.
What are your all’s thoughts about the Monica Lewensky fashion looks for Reformation? The comment about red being everywhere made me think about this look—from her shoes to her dress. Trying to post the link to CNN article, but not yet successful.
Oh I just went and looked. She looks fantastic. I’m very, very here for this era of Monica Lewinsky empowerment and really respect what she’s made of her life.
Regarding the fashion: I really like these silhouettes on other people, but I struggle with imagining actually wearing long full skirts. I want to like them! They just feel so modest church-y to me, which is definitely a reaction to the religion I was raised in and left. :) maybe part of my healing will be being able to wear modest long full skirts without feeling like I’m going to church…
The secret is to pair it with a top that would have made the judgmental people at church raise their eyebrows and talk about you behind your back. Or wear it in red. Or better yet, both!
+1
The sleeveless tops help balance out the heavier skirts, to my eye.
For my body shape, this look is actually very flattering. I am pear shaped and like the sleeveless look.
Saw an article on BBC this morning about that.
I liked the red dress but not enough to buy it, and everything else was meh. I wish her success with this, but it’s not for me.
She looks great. Good for her.
I think it’s cool. I like her.
Me too.
I don’t think capitalizing on her notoriety makes her empowered. I think it just makes her tacky.
She’s not capitalizing on her notoriety in the campaign. What do you want her to do? Avoid the public eye and hide away because somebody took advantage of her when she was 22?
I think 25 years ago she tried the “just put your head down and move on with life” thing, and no one was willing to be associated with her, so I don’t know how anyone could blame her for deciding to just be unapologetically in the public eye.
+100. Personally I think the world owes her a some kind warm light after what she went through. Anon/2:30pm if you haven’t listened to any recent interviews with her, I highly recommend. And also, the Reformation campaign is the opposite of tacky. It’s not like its SHEIN.
OH HELL YES
i really hope all of these “uncommitted” voters get “committed” by November, or they’ll screw everyone over
There is a lot that the Biden administration could do to win over voters if they wanted! Maybe they should try that approach.
IDK if wanting a functional democracy where votes matter isn’t enough to get people behind Biden then I don’t think specific policies really matter.
GOP, at Trump’s behest, just dumped McDaniel in favor of a guy whose main goal is invalidating non GOP votes.
Such as? And keep in mind he has to work with the GOP House and a bare minority in the Senate.
Not being snarky, am genuinely curious.
Stop funding Israel’s war and force a ceasefire. That is literally what this protest is about. It’s trying to send a message because clearly it’s not getting through
Why should Israel cease fire while Hamas keeps killing people (Israelis and Palestinian civilians)? Why does the world only ever blame Jews for wars? Why isn’t anyone asking Hamas to share its supplies of food/medicine with Palestinian civilians? Why isn’t anyone protesting to make Hamas let the Red Cross visit the hostages? Answer: because these are all just different versions of anti-Jewish hate.
Amen, 3:40. + 1 million
Israel is a recognize nation, and Hamas is a terrorist group. We hold Israel to a higher standard and in return they get legitimacy, power, and money. If you want, we can treat Israel and Hamas the same.
I mean, talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face. If you don’t vote Biden in Nov, then you’re voting for Trump. Gaza doesn’t have oil, so why would Trump care?
yes, it’s like 2016 all over again – if your options are Trump or Biden and you vote for neither, and it’s a close race, you might as well have voted for the person who has no regard for democracy, which doesn’t help your cause let alone anyone else.
Democrats never seem to care about democracy when it comes to their own primaries.
We know that the Hillary campaign encouraged media coverage of Trump because they thought he’d be the easiest candidate to beat.
Right or wrong, people will become too demoralized to show up if the campaign is “yeah maybe we’re terrible but the other side is worse.”
That’s cool that women are too demoralized to vote to maintain access to abortion and birth control. And of course IVF.
It’s rich to hear democrats constantly whining about “democracy” while trying to imprison their president’s political opponent, ban him from the ballot, and bury him under civil judgments and attorneys’ fees. Notwithstanding the merits of those matters (which vary greatly), there’s little question that Trump would not be facing any of them but for his decision to run for president. Several commenters above are explicitly hoping/counting on these non-democratic means to prevent him from winning the election. I’m a moderate probably planning to vote for Biden, but the “BUT DEMOCRACY” appeal is pretty lame.
I see this differently. He is being targeted because he broke the law over and over and over again. While the civil case might not have been brought had he never become President, the criminal matters are all the result of his decisions to flout the law, actively work to undermine democracy, and engage in self-serving conduct without regard to endangering the security of these United States. He is not entitled to break the law and escape punishment just because he has the platform to run for president again.
Oh please. You’re not a moderate if you think the right and left are remotely equivalent in this issue. Trump tried to steal an election and might have succeeded if Pence and state election officials hadn’t had a backbone. When he didn’t succeed in that he encouraged his supporters to stage an armed insurrection that killed several people. He’s explicitly threatened autocracy in a second term and will make sure whoever his VP is won’t pull a Pence and will help him get away with election fraud.
Biden is not a perfect guy and there are certainly plenty of valid criticisms of him, but there’s zero evidence he’s going to try to be a dictator.
Do you think that the things Trump is charged with should just be allowed? Ignored?
Honestly…. how do you think the Republicans would react, if Biden or Obama had done any of the things Trump is charged with? You know they would never back down and charge them to fullest extent of the law.
The Republicans are screaming to Impeach/charge Biden now for anything they can find, and have yet to find…. .anything. Doesn’t Fox refer to the “Biden crime family” every day? I mean… the Republicans impeached Clinton for “lying” about a consensual affair. You really think the Republicans wouldn’t do the exact same thing if Biden had Trump’s resume of bad acts?
So you think it would be pro-democracy/rule of law to sweep his crimes under the rug because he’s the former president? Make it make sense…
You’re not fooling anyone. “Notwithstanding the merits”? So meritorious charges and lawsuits shouldn’t be brought against anyone who is a political opponent of an elected officia? “Probably” planning to vote for Biden? Sure you were.
“It’s rich to hear democrats constantly whining about “democracy” while trying to imprison their president’s political opponent, ban him from the ballot, and bury him under civil judgments and attorneys’ fees.”
Do you mean to say that people who commit fraud, rape and treason should not be held accountable according to the laws of this nation?
Right like they think Trump will be better for Gaza?! It’s maddening.
I voted in MI uncommitted bc I am pissed off at the democrats and Biden. He should not be running and I hate what is happening in Gaza. Otherwise, I honestly think he has been a good president but he is too old and should have built up someone else to run. He is likely to literally keel over from old age before we get to Nov/Inauguration and could very well die while in office.
Don’t doubt that I will be voting for him in Nov though. A lot of us uncommitteds will hold our nose and do it. A protest vote in this primary is the best avenue to show dissatisfaction.
I love Whitmer and while it would’ve been worse for MI (potentially) I wish he had picked her for VP so she could be the person running right now and not him.
Fantasy shopping question – I’m setting aside $2k or so of my bonus for a treat and I’m debating on a few options. I’m using a work trip to NYC in April to shop IRL but would like to narrow it down. I have a pretty classic style and have all of the ‘basic’ pieces so was thinking of something slightly more current but still quite classic. My current thoughts are:
Savette bag (large Tondo or the Symmetry), the silver ‘Bone Cuff’ from Tiffany (for my right wrist), a chain/charm from Ashley Zhang (the eames albert chain or perhaps the trombone chain), or a pair of the Dior J’adior slingbacks.
Thoughts? Suggestions?
I lean heavily towards bags or jewelry for treat purchases. I’m so hard on shoes, it’s not worth the expense.
We’ve talked about this before here and there are differing opinions but I am in the camp to not spend that kind of money to advertise for a company so I’d eliminate the Dior J’Adior slingbacks since the image search is showing them as clearly branded. I vote jewelry but from a one off store with less recognizable stuff than Tiffany; I’ve seen some beautiful statement pieces at the MOMA museum store.
I’d rule out the shoes – aside from finding the logo elastic personally unattractive and the oppos-te of classic, shoes will die faster than jewelry or a bag.
Have you tried on the cuff? That’s the kind of thing that will either be a perfect fit or an uncomfortable wrist-bruising piece. I do love the look if it fits you!
I would get a Loewe Flamenco bag.
I would buy gold jewellery. Or the bone cuff.
Shoes help – what shoes do you all wear with fuller skirt midi length dresses for work that are not high heels, not sandals and (because work) not sneakers? Like what shape/style of flats? It’s going to be too warm for booties/boots soon. My law firm, despite us being biz casual dress code, does not want us wearing sneakers to the office. Thank you!
Rothy points but I have no idea if they are stylish. I wear them 75% of the time in black or taupe.
+1 to Rothys but I’m wearing the ‘lounge loafers’ more than the points. I also wear leather ‘smoking slippers’ or a sleeker style leather loafer as a more casual version. For big days I still stick with real leather flats/heels.
Pointed toe flats or mary janes? Or low heeled versions. Loafers?
I like low heeled oxfords with dresses, but I’m not pretending that’s super fashionable.
huaraches, but that’s still probably too casual for what you’re after.
These are a very specific “look,” but I wear shoes from Cobb Hill (Rockport), usually T strap Mary Janes. Luckily for me, these are very appropriate for my geographic location and organization and I get a lot of compliments. Not sure they would have worked at my east coast law firm but then again, neither would a full midi skirt have worked (we are talking ten years ago for that).
Once the Chelsea boot weather finally departs, I plan to live in my loafers that have a slight lug sole until we are firmly into sandal weather.
I just ordered lug sole loafers for spring and I can’t wait; I know they’re going to be such workhorses for me.
I don’t really see that style of dress in the office, but tan leather mules (backless) are surprisingly versatile.
Any tricks for keeping them on your feet? I need something with at least a lip on the back (like (cough) crocs).
honestly, I walk a little more gently than normal when I’m wearing them, and they only work barefoot.
Loafers with chunky soles.
For those of you with experience challenging medical bills, how do you do it? I keep running into brick walls and it feels futile to even bother.
I just received a medical bill for a consult with a doctor and also a procedure (diagnostic mammogram) that under my state law should be 100% covered by insurance without regard to deductible or copays. I am positive about the state law aspect as there were many recent news articles extolling the virtues of the state mandate to cover not just screening mammograms but also the inevitable call backs for follow up diagnostic mammograms. The consult was a 5 minute exam with a doctor who I hadn’t met before but who is part of my doctor’s practice- it was a rush appointment and my doctor wasn’t available that day. The bill reflects a 55 minute new patient consult for a whopping ~$600. I haven’t hit my deductible yet, but after insurance adjustment the consult is ~$400 out of pocket. The doctor directed me to get a diagnostic mammogram, which is also after insurance adjustment, being billed to me at over ~$500 out of pocket.
I tried calling the billing department of the provider to explain that I’m not a new patient and the consult was only 5 minutes, but the rep just said that that is what the doctor billed so that is what they reflect. I asked her to review the billing codes to make sure they match the services I received and she said she’s not a billing code expert and that I should call my insurance company to request the correct billing codes. I called my insurance company and the rep said they don’t provide billing codes, it is in the doctor’s discretion what they bill for and I need to take it up with the billing department at my providers office. The insurance company confirmed that there is a state mandate, but said the billing codes used for the diagnostic mammogram didn’t fall under the state mandate so I need to have the provider change the billing code, but she would not tell me the correct billing code to use. I called back again to the billing department at my providers office and they insist they can’t correct the codes and that I need to call someone at my doctor’s office. I’ve called and sent an email to my provider’s office with no response.
At this point, each party is just pointing the finger at each other and no one can do anything. What is the “correct” way to get this addressed? I am tearing my hair out and wasting hours on hold. Is this just what it is to deal with medical bills these days??
It’s the office. Call and ask to speak with the billing office manager. Ask for a medical record review. If they still blame the doctor for how s/he coded the visit, ask to speak with the practice administrator.
I’m a physician. The provider is responsible for changing the billing code — no one else can legally change it. I’d contact your regular provider and see if they can nudge their colleague to make the correction. It is fraudulent to overbill, and if you need to, you can invoke that language to get people to pay attention.
The tricky part is that providers can bill based on either time or on “complexity”. So even if that new-to-you provider only spent 5 minutes in the exam room with you, if they spent 55 minutes reviewing your history and coordinating your care, then they can still bill for a 55 minute visit. You can ask to see the provider’s notes from that visit to see if they included a statement about their total time spent on the case — it would be a statement at the end of the note, something like “I spent a total of 70 minutes on this patient’s care, including in-person, care coordination, and review of patient’s medical history.” But if all they did was a quick chart review and 5 minutes with you, then they definitely need to adjust their coding.
Sorry you are dealing with this. It stinks.
So the incompetent providers who filled up my chart with their flailing are now the reason that I always get charged as a complex patient though I’d have a much thinner chart if they’d run the appropriate tests and made the correct diagnosis when my symptoms first appeared? Great system we have here.
+1
This is all good advice.
Unfortunately, you wont make progress on the visit charges.
Just focus on the mammogram.
Was it your yearly screening mammogram?
If not, was it a follow-up screening/diagnostic mammogram, to clarify a finding on your first screening mammogram? It’s a little unclear from your post.
Because while those are “free” in my state too, if it was Diagnostic because you had a new complaint or finding on exam that made the doctor order this mammogram (especially if you are not in an age group where screening mammograms are typically covered), then you may be out of luck with the mammogram as well. Because then it was diagnostic… to try to find a cause of the new “finding” / complaint you had. And not diagnostic…. after your first mammogram found something… to help clarify it.
Your only hope is to get the doctor to change the code, and trying to find the one person in the clinic who “assists” the doctors with billing/coding issues – they can help. It can be very difficult to find this person. Keep calling and ask for the clinic helper/contact, send the doctor a direct message….
Sorry if this doesn’t makes sense.
I have thousands and thousands in medical bills every year, and am constantly struggling with mistakes in coverage/billing. At some point, you have to choose your battles. Hopefully you are ok. It is so stressful to be dealing with this when you are sick. Good luck.
I’ve had multiple issues with medical insurance as I have two children with autism who have received extensive therapy over the years.
Call the practice billing manager and have them review the billing codes. If it’s still being rejected by the insurance company appeal with the insurance company. If they reject the appeal (which has happened too many times) call the office state controller for insurance and get them involved. In New Jersey everytime they were invoked, everything was processed correctly within 24hrs and fixed like magic.
Thanks for this advice.
The only thing I’d add is maybe to look up the medical policy yourself and highlight the requirements that need to be address in an appeal letter so your doctor’s billing staff have what they need right in front of them.
I can’t help with the bills, but GOOD FOR YOU for doing the thing and getting the mammogram. I’d pay out of pocket a hundred times over to get the peace of mind of a clear scan or an early diagnosis while it’s treatable.
I’m over a year into a similar dispute with no end in sight. It’s beyond frustrating. I’ve gotten to the point of confirmed correct billing codes, so now I’m back to fighting insurance.
One other consideration – state laws generally do not extend to “self-funded” health plans. For example, if your coverage is through your employer, and your employer has more than maybe 100 or 200 covered lives in their plan, they probably self-fund the plan (depending on their risk tolerance, past claims history, attitude about finances and liquidity, etc.). Self-funded plans have to comply with federal law, but are exempt from most states laws regarding health benefits.
My experience in New Jersey was that they ignored that fact and pushed back to declare the children’s care be covered. My expectation is that this was to avoid the state covering their extremely expensive therapy because it should have all gone through Medicaid as both children are designated as disabled , qualifying for coverage.
Has anyone done one of those at-home foot peels? I just tried one last night, am very curious about what to expect. The packet says that the action will start in 5-7 days. Online photos promise feet as soft as a newborn baby (lol), but I’m curious about IRL results.
Also [TW: gross question], once the peeling starts, do you pull off the peeling part? Or does it all just shed on its own?
I’ve done it twice. The first time, I missed the instruction that you aren’t supposed to apply lotion to your feet until the peeling is over, and it had basically no effect. The second time was more successful. My results were not as dramatic as promised, but I do think it made a difference.
For me, the peeling wasn’t in big pieces. It was just little rolls, like if you’ve ever used one of those Korean exfoliating towels. I used a pumice stone after showering but otherwise left them alone and let the shedding happen naturally.
If you soak in a tub, it works faster. I’ve used the K beauty ones and beauty pie, and my hoof feet were vastly improved.
Thanks for specific recs! I also have hoof feet (and my weird child is constantly trying to gnaw on them), so I’ve really wanted to clean them up lately.
I literally snort-lol’d at this!
Levity was much needed in my day; thanks for the laugh.
Adding: soak in a tub before applying the peel if you really want it to work.
I do them probably once a year and they work. I have a tony moly one right now that I need to do but I keep forgetting.
Don’t pull because you’re likely to pull off skin that isn’t ready to come and end up bleeding. Soak your feet for 10 minutes at night to speed it up and use scrub them with a washcloth or something to help it ball up and fall off.
I do them every so often! The skin will feel tight-ish and will get shiny and then start to peel. It’s fascinating and gross at the same time.
I am also gross and peel the skin off because it is a compulsion, but you’re supposed to trim the edges and let it shed naturally. I’ve used a pumice stone and a washcloth to get the bits around my toes and ankles. If you wear socks, the friction will help loosen the skin and also will avoid having flakes of skin around your house. It’s not a cute process at all…
Don’t pull the peeling part but it’s hard not to. I keep up with my feet with lotion and a foot file but I still had a whole layer of skin come off with a baby feet peel. It was gross and fascinating. Toward the end of the peeling I started soaking and then lotioning and that seemed to help the peeling finish up.
I’ve done it. Kerasal cream works much better than a foot peel, and is less gross.
I am so angry right now. I just got a complaint from a client about one of my direct reports acting inappropriately and making a woman uncomfortable in her workplace. He’s an outside sales person so it’s his job to visit clients, although it’s certainly not is forking job to hit on the admin staff. It’s the last straw; he’s been warned and told specifically before to not engage in this type of behavior in sit down serious meetings where we were explicit about how he interact with office staff, and women. We had already been low key looking for a replacement and so now we will just fire him right away and have the position empty until we fill it. It’s fine business wise, I’m just so frustrated that I gave him a more chances.
I already cleared it with my boss that we’re firing him on Friday (when he is next in the office) and sent him a message not to contact this client again because I received a complaint. He was like “why” and I just said “your conversation with XX, we will discuss on Friday”. So the firing shouldn’t be a surprise to him. If anyone has advice there, please feel free to share. The logistics are a headache since he lives a couple hours from the office. I apologized profusely to the client and told them it would be very seriously handled and promised the employee would never be back in their town.
I just can’t shake that I feel so upset about this. I feel so bad for the woman admin. I have spent my entire career in a male dominated industry and have experienced similar instances like this. I remember feeling embarrassed to talk about it and confused if I was making something a bigger thing than it was and infuriated that it happened and just a little bit scared and it made me second guess my interactions for a while going forward. It makes me sick that I have some responsibility for employing a guy who’s out there doing other things, and that I gave him multiple chances. And also, I’ve worked really hard to build the reputation of this company and then there’s THIS. Ughdkjhfd;lsakjfd;lkjaf;dlkjadfs;lkfjad;fljij
Ugh! I’m sure you already know this, but during the firing, you must set all emotions aside. Be straight and to the point: “On X day, you did ABC and were told not to engage in this type of behavior again. You did it again on X day and the organization has no other choice but to terminate you effective immediately. Jane Doe in HR will take it from here.” That’s it. No discussion. No hearing him out and his side of the story. It’s done.
It’s okay to be upset about his behavior. It’s horrible to think that there are people out there in the workforce that still do these types of things to women. You’re the hero here addressing it. Many weaker bosses would not take action.
+1000. You’re doing the right thing, and that’s not nothing.
+1000 also from me. Channel all your frustration and ruminating into writing every little detail down so you have watertight documentation. Keep the meeting short. If he tries to debate you: “Bob, the decision has been made, so let me go over the steps to wrap this up”.
OP here. Thank you. Absolutely hear your first paragraph regarding keeping it brief, blunt and without emotion.
We’re too small of a company to have a HR person or dept; there’s a few of us at the top of leadership that split up the HR duties. Small boutique type company. I normally quite like the size company we are; not this week when I really wish we had the HR person.
Also, thank you for just the supportive comments generally. It’s been really frustrating because he’s outside sales and doing this outside the company, so it’s been a series of rumors and 3rd, 4th, 5th hand accounts.
Resist the urge to say “take a hike you f***ng creep,” but please say it in your head from me!
deal, for sure. :)
Great advice.
Be clear, cold, and concise in your statements.
No discussion.
Stare him down.
Let him feel the clear impact.
Thank you for doing this.
I’m not great at being cold but I like that, that is a helpful adjective to add.
“ You’re the hero here addressing it. ”
This.
Why can’t you fire him today? Do it over the phone or Zoom.
I seriously thought about it. Frankly I need a day to be able to have a calm conversation about it. And talking to my boss (president) we want at least one of the top leadership (president and vp) in the meeting with me to fire him. VP is on vacation this week (but will be very happy to hear that this sales guy was fired while he was gone; he has been leading the quiet search for the replacement), and company president won’t be back in the office until Friday.
I’m really sorry. I’m glad they complained and in a way that speaks to the strength of the relationship – I’d consider going out there in person, not to fall on the floor apologizing but just to say in person to both the admin and the client contact that this should not have happened, he was fired, you are really glad they spoke up, and it won’t happen again.
I think you’re right, that’s a good thought.
Honestly, I see why you’re so angry, but everyone here is doing exactly the right thing. The admin reported it to her boss/the client, your client reported it to you, and you and your boss are firing him. Yes, it stinks that he’s done this before and he’s been unable to change his ways, but I hope you make it clear to him on Friday just how unacceptable his behavior is. And hopefully it helps “train” you to be less embarrassed and confused about these kinds of issues should they come up in the future. If you want, you should also let your client know next week that you’ve taken employment action against the sales person (which the client will likely understand to mean he’s fired) and you want to thank the client’s employee for speaking up. Reiterate that you agree his actions are unacceptable in the workplace and you appreciate the client reporting it to you. Some of this may restate what you’ve already told the client, but that’s ok, especially if you didn’t explicitly thank the employee the first time around.
Oh I totally agree with everyone, beside sales guy, doing exactly the right thing. The client actually handled the phone call well, which I told them right away I very much appreciated. I will follow up next week.
you should be upset – it sounds like you are saying he hasn’t been fired over this before?
Men should get a one strike and you’re out rule on harassment or treating women poorly. I’m shocked you gave him more opportunities. I hope you, too, learn from your mistakes here.
this is harsh. OP clarified above that it’s been rumor mill hearsay he-said-she-said stuff — and now there’s been enough of it that it’s clear he’s really a problem.
Thanks. Yes, it’s been exactly that – all been very rumor mill hearsay, always 3rd, 4th, 5th hand about a vague “creepiness” feeling. Inappropriate and he is being fired, although I would say it’s probably a stretch to say that he is outright harassing these women (at least from the accounts I’ve received). Of course that is the problem with harassment, when does it cross from this guy makes me uncomfortable to this guy is harassing me? I don’t tip toe around things; when I heard this stuff I addressed it with the sales person. But today was the most immediate complaint I received and he is done.
That said, roxie, we have learned from the mistakes here.
Just to clarify my comments about the uncomfortable/harassment – if we would have heard: sales guy harassed me/is continuously harassing me – it would have been one and done. THat’s what I meant by when does it cross. Instead what we have been getting is that so and so complained that she doesn’t like him and he makes her feel uneasy or uncomfortable. WHICH IS NOT COOL. and was addressed. but it felt like an overreaction to fire based on what we had.
OP, I wish all bosses everywhere were like you.
Aside from firing, perhaps personally pay the client a visit. Also assign a female sales rep next time, or attend the next sales call with your new rep.
Also let them know after the fact that he was fired.
We don’t have a female sales rep to assign, however the top person I’m trying to recruit to the job is a woman and would be assigned to them. fingers crossed!
You know how many people would just sweep this under the rug because the comment “wasn’t that bad” and he’s “such a good sales guy”? Thank you for not being one of them.
Well it easier because he’s not a good sales guy. LOL. He’s mediocre. But even if he was the best sales guy, he’d be done here.
+1
I worked with alllll of those second, third, fourth, infinity chance guys at my big corporate job for 20 years. So yes to this, and three cheers to OP for getting it done!!!
Co-sign.
I just want to say “thank you” for firing him.
I went through absolute hell with a direct manager. His managers did nothing. HR did nothing. I would have loved to have someone go through the formal termination process with him and then kick him to the curb.
ughhhh I hate that. It’s just garbage to do nothing when you have a first hand account and it’s ongoing.
I know it’s not any consolation, but the fact that you are so upset by his behavior and the situation is such a good thing. You are doing everything right in dealing with it this way.
ugh. Thanks. I just have a pit in my stomach from his behavior.
It is worth having a chat with an external HR person/law firm just to make sure you have covered off everything you need to in your state.
Also consider having some scripts for when he wants to tell you ‘his side’. I often go with ‘we aren’t here to discuss our decision to end your employment, that’s done. Do you have any questions about what happens now?’ (rinse & repeat).
Finally, this was such a good description of the impact of his actions, I’m sorry that you too know these feelings ‘I remember feeling embarrassed to talk about it and confused if I was making something a bigger thing than it was and infuriated that it happened and just a little bit scared’.
Watch question. What do folks think about mixed metal bands versus just plain stainless? Any recommendations for classic watches? I’m looking to spend $200-400. I’m a fine boned petite, so looking at small watch faces.
My mom gave her mixed metal Cartier tank to me more than 20 years ago. She wore it for almost 20 years before developing an an allergy, and I wanted it. We both really liked having the mixed metal band, and she strongly preferred the look of mixed metal to her subsequent all-gold band. You can wear any jewlery with it, which worked well for us because she tended toward gold-tones and I tend toward silver-tones. I don’t have a rec for a specific watch, but I absolutely would buy a mixed metal band again.
I think the big argument in favor of mixed metal is that it combines warm and cool tones in a way that makes it work with a lot of different clothing colors and jewelry. BUT… for myself I went with a rose gold band. I wear mostly warm colors or colors that are just over the edge of cool. I’m also a jewelry person so wouldn’t be opposed to getting a second watch at some point in the future, in which case I would either get mixed metal or stainless.
I am ALL for mixed metal bands! Family and I have had good luck with Seiko, Pulsar, and Citizen. Sometimes I find Timex had great faces but not bands—maybe it can be switched. I too am enthusiastic for small faces watches rather than larger dials or smart watches.
I like a mix because I feel like it doesn’t boss my jewelry around.
i love mixed metals. i have a burberry one.
My omega is mixed metal and very lovely. As is the Cartier panthere.
Encouragement to do the thing…
I’ve been putting off starting my book (academic, I’m very productive but need a book for promotion) for literally 6 years. Today, I made a database file for data, found the archival sources, and started reading the first source. It took 45 minutes, which was 45 minutes more than I spent on the book project in 2023.
Congratulations! Well done. Once again, starting is so often the hardest part. You’ve now started.
I should revise. Starting a book probably isn’t the hardest part. But clearly it was a barrier that you’ve now cleared!
Congratulations! From one academic to another — sitting down & doing it day after day is the only way. Some days will feel like garbage & you’ll want to give up; some days you’ll feel like a genius & things will flow. No matter! Sit down again. And again. And again.
You can do this! And it’ll feel great ultimately and you’ll learn a lot in the process.
Right? I’m not teaching this calendar year and have submitted two articles already and need to really take advantage of the free time to write this book.
From one academic to another, way to go! I have two articles to finish this semester and I am struggling to get them done.
Super congratulations! I love how you say you did more in 45 minutes than all of 2023. If you are discovering it helps to chunk down the writing into manageable bite-sized tasks, you might want to take a look at Tiago Forte’s “Building a Second Brain.” As a former academic, I found his process much more helpful than Zetteltasken, while informed by some of the same knowledge management and bounded rationality principles.
Just a vent.
I am dealing with the fallout from an auto accident where a distracted driver hit me and totaled my car. My insurance company is now low-balling the value of my vehicle and I am frustrated at how much time and mental energy it takes for me to point out that no, my vehicle having lower miles, more features, and better condition does not, in fact, mean they should lower the value of the comparable vehicles they used as the basis for the payout offer. They need to add value to account for those differences, not take it away. Why is this so hard to understand??
I’m sorry, it really stinks. I went through this in 2017 with State Farm. SF went from a $38,995 valuation to 48,755 to 52,065. It really disgusted me that it took so long after I provided numerous examples of my car’s value via Autotrader listings in my area.
It really does stink. I’m sorry to hear you had a similar situation. That change in valuation on your vehicle is wild! Gives me hope, at least, that I am not being unreasonable in not accepting my insurer’s low offers.
I have done this dance before and understand how to advocate for the best number possible. The adjuster on the other end this time is either acting in bad faith or is completely incompetent. I plan to switch insurance companies once this current mess is closed out.
Oh yikes, it’s hard enough to have been through an accident and recover from it as a human being. Sorry to hear that your insurance company is being such a pain about the car.
I’ve only had a car totalled once, and luckily it was parked at the time with nobody in it. It was still a shock to see the poor car in that state.
Sharing the below as a PSA for anyone who is eligible for USAA and is not taking advantage of their insurance. (OP, please accept my apologies, as I recognize it may not be helpful in your current situation.) We had the replacement value of the car in our account within a week, and were surprised at the generous valuation.
Writting from Europe, then maybe no usefull in USA.
I have been last month in the same situation and first I checked in some webs where they offered for free a valuation taking in consideration all the aspects (millage, extras an so on) then from there I paid for a valuation (90€) to dispute with my insurer.
Hello! Looking to gift a friend a gift card for a Korean spa in NYC. I’m not local, so I’m asking here for recommendations before making the purchase. Thank you!
Juvenex
this
Thank you!
My life right now: family member 1 is worshipped by (not bright, easily manipulated, house poor elderly) family member 2. Family member 1 suggested something to family member 2 that is financially ruinous, but for which family member 1 stands to gain low six figures. This is a violation of fiduciary duty in family member 1’s profession.
If you can guess, yep, I’m the problem for stating that family member 1 is acting unethically and such ethics violations are in fact reportable.
Sounds like it could be financial exploitation of an elderly person to boot, check your local laws
I am stopping this proposed solution from happening, so that probably isn’t applicable. Happy enough to smack this person around with an ethics violation.