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Thursday’s Workwear Report: Scuba Seamed Knee-Length Dress

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A woman wearing a black short-sleeved dress and carrying a black bag

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

I’ve been thinking a lot about “starter” wardrobes for folks just starting out in the workforce lately, and when I came across this short-sleeved dress from Banana Republic Factory, all I could think was “I would have worn that at least once a week when I was a junior associate.”

A basic black dress that fits well is worth its weight in gold when you’re trying to build a professional wardrobe from scratch. Wear this one on its own, under a cropped cardigan, with a non-matching blazer — the sky's the limit. And if your budget allows, grab the blue color too! 

The dress is $54 at Banana Republic Factory and comes in regular sizes XS-XL and petite sizes XXS-L. 

Hunting for something similar? Some of the best dresses for work as of 2024 include options from J.Crew, BOSS, T. Tahari, and Lands' End. For really affordable options, check out Quince and Amazon sellers Miusol or MUXXN. We've also rounded up the best plus-size dresses for work!

basic black sheath dress
BOSS
one of the best basic black sheath dresses
T. Tahari
one of the best dresses for work, the j.crew resume dress
J.Crew
great work dress with pockets and sleeves in washable wool
Lands' End

Sales of note for 3/21/25:

  • Nordstrom – Spring sale, up to 50% off: Free People, AllSaints, AG, and more
  • Ann Taylor – 25% off suiting + 25% off tops & sweaters + extra 50% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Eloquii – $39+ dresses & jumpsuits + up to 50% off everything else
  • J.Crew – 25% off select linen & cashmere + up to 50% off select styles + extra 40% off sale
  • J.Crew Factory – Friends & Family Sale: Extra 15% off your purchase + extra 50% off clearance + 50-60% off spring faves
  • M.M.LaFleur – Flash Sale: Get the Ultimate Jardigan for $198 on sale; use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Buy 1 get 1 50% off everything, includes markdowns

249 Comments

  1. If you were in your mid 40s with a very thin credit profile (good history with a mid-700s score, just not much in the file beyond a nearly-gone mortgage, a single, year-old credit card, and an auto loan paid off a few years ago), what would you do to ensure your credit score doesn’t tank once the mortgage gets paid off? I intend to stay in this house for a few more years but don’t want my lack of credit use to prevent me from getting decent rates on another mortgage when I do move next. Thanks!

    1. Get another credit card and I don’t think this should be a problem. I’m the same age and just applied for a mortgage with a score above 800 with nothing but a few credit cards, a long ago paid off car loan, and a mortgage from the house I lived in several years ago (sold, not paid off).

    2. Keep your current credit card and add a new one about a year before your mortgage is paid off. Most banks have a no fee card option.

      I accidentally temporarily tanked my score a couple years ago when I cancelled my oldest credit card without having another one for at least a year first.

      1. Don’t wait to get the card. Length of credit is part of your score and I’m sure it helps that I’ve had one of my cards since I was 18 (now in my mid 40s) and my others for over a decade now.

      2. OP here. Perhaps a dumb follow-up question. My current card is with my local credit union where I do the majority of my banking. Does it matter where I get a second card from? Or if it is the same type of card (MC, Amex, Visa, etc.)?

        2. Does not matter. Get a second card and make one payment per month on it. I have a very old CC that I don’t use really at all but we auto pay our cell phone bill on it monthly just to keep it open given it’s my longest opened card and the one bill is to show responsible activity on it because (and i could be wrong here) I think opening a card is not enough – you have to actually use the card. So we do the one bill auto paid monthly.

          1. This is the way. Autopay one bill to the credit card and have the credit card autopay from your bank account. Then it creates a history but you don’t have to do anything after the initial set up.

        3. Get a second card for wherever you shop most frequently as you’ll get the associated benefit. For us, that’s a Costco MC that we mostly only use at Costco.

        4. I would get a different type of card. Costco only takes Visa in-store and at the gas stations, and Mastercard is apparently slightly better for international travel.

          1. Other than directly at MasterCard website, what places can I get a MC? I am not a huge fan of applying online….

    3. I helped a sibling in a similar situation increase their score by adding them as an authorized user to one of my older credit cards. There was a pretty significant bump to their score in less than a month. Just make sure the card owner is responsible! I think any of their missed payments on the card would show up on your credit report as well.

      1. Oh, yeah, no, I am not interested in tying my credit score’s fate to someone else. I have a reasonable score myself, just want to maintain it.

        1. That’s fair! It has worked great for us and helped them develop the long credit history needed to boost their score.

    4. Get another card. Charge something monthly and pay in full, not just balance due on prior statement, pay everything and before the due date.

      1. That’s…completely unnecessary. Just pay the statement balance every month before the due date and you’re good. It is considered paid in full as long as you do that, no need to pay this month’s charges as well. If you’re only charging one thing per month as several others have advised (I do this too on my oldest card), you’ll end up with no charges for the next statement balance, and so you won’t get that next month’s payment considered as part of your payment history.

    5. My husband was in a similar situation. He had a grand total of 2 items on his credit score, in his late 30s, when we married. I added him to all my cards. I recognize some people follow the Dave Ramsey (ugh, he’s problematic) line of thinking that any debt is bad, but then you truly can be in a situation where you don’t have enough credit.

      My DH recently was sent a pre-approval for a major CC, and he applied. He got turned down due to too few credit lines and too recent of a credit history, even though his score is 730s and we don’t carry any debt month to month. This is after 2 years of marriage with him being a cosigner.

    6. Congratulations! You have clearly managed money incredibly well, never lived beyond your means, and made a very good living ng for yourself. Kudos! Congratulations! Amazing! Best to you! Never change.

          3. I think she was commenting on the “sudden” part (ie some people have always been a little mean here. )
            I’m an OG on this blog and I do think there’s an uptick in the sarcastic comments calling posters out if they sound even a little pleased with themselves.

      4. Thanks! Yes, living frugally, DIY-ing all the repairs my 1960’s starter home in a distant exurb needs, driving old cars until they die, making mid-5 figures (before taxes) in a MCOL area, and avoiding optional medical care in order to stay out of debt have all been such a dream.

  2. Travel question. Does anyone have recommendations for cities that are themselves fun to visit and also easy to do day trips from without a car? I went on a solo trip to Vienna last year and loved exploring the city and being able to take the train to other cities for day trips. I’m looking for something similar, but different. Ps thanks to everyone here who encouraged me last year that solo travel to Vienna would safe and fun!

    1. Amsterdam! I traveled solo a few years ago and took the train to The Hague and back for a day trip. With more time I would have also looked into doing something similar to Delft or Bruges.

    2. I did the same in Italy years ago. Stayed in Pisa, visited the beach, Florence and Sienna by public transportation.

    3. I like Florence. Pisa is only an hour, beach towns like Follonica are not too far and options for full day bus tours into the country side to wineries etc. Milan/Rome/Venice are all two hours ish if you don’t mind the occasional longer day. I tend to prefer one home base and longer day trips as I hate packing/unpacking and like to read or snooze on the train.

      I’ve done Italy on my own with my elementary aged kids twice now and it’s fine from a safety perspective. Be cautious about pickpockets at major tourist sites. We tend to eat out mid day and then shop and try new foods for dinner at our accommodation so no advice on evenings out.

      1. Hmmm. I find Florence so overrated. I would never want to home base there. Frankly, I would just skip it all together and pick almost any other city in Italy. But YMMV and perhaps it is a good ‘hub’ for going to other places.

        1. I would also stay in a different city personally, but I can’t imagine feeling like Florence is just skippable. Maybe it’s harder to avoid a touristy experience there.

        2. I prefer Pisa to Florence for city atmosphere but Florence is one of the best connected cities in Italy if you’re looking to maximize day tripping to other spots via train. There’s also some pretty great accommodation options if you are outside the main tourist areas.

        3. Omg I love Florence. I’ve been all over Italy and Florence/Tuscany is my favorite part. It’s true you can hit the main tourist highlights in 2-3 days (I’d suggest 3 unless you want a packed itinerary) but it’s such a lovely city with great food, wine and views and is one of my favorite places to unwind and just be. Plus of course day trips to the beautiful countryside. Obviously bigger cities like Rome, Paris, London etc have more museums but the vibes in Florence are just perfect to me.

          We went in low season though so it wasn’t filled with tourists. Maybe it’s different in the summer.

    4. Paris – aside from the close day trips like Versailles, on our last visit we did day excursions to Giverny (1 hr by train) and Reims & Epernay for a Champagne tasting day (about 1 hr by TGV high speed).

    5. Good suggestions above and I’ll add London. Super fun city by itself and easy day trips via train to places like Windsor, Oxford, and Cambridge.

    6. Almost literally every city in Europe. The whole continent has an excellent train system.

      1. Yes, the public transport system (trains, buses) is great in Europe.
        The Netherlands (Amsterdam, Rotterdam, Hague, Utrecht, Delft, beaches and there is a fast train to Paris and London from Rotterdam), Germany, Austria, Switzerland, Sweden, France, the UK – all can be traveled comfortably solo and using just public transport. If you want to go off the beaten track, check Poland (Warsaw for history, Wroclaw, Gdansk, Krakow are beautiful), the Czech republic (Prague & hiking in the many national parks), Slovakia (great hiking).

    8. Switzerland! I went with a home base in Geneva and did tons of day trips by train. You can get practically anywhere in Switzerland on the train.

    9. Barcelona! I love vacations that mix city and countryside, and we spent a glorious day in Montserrat and could have easily done more side trips up and down the coast had we had more days.

    10. Glad you enjoyed your solo trip to Vienna! I’d suggest London, Florence, or Madrid.

    12. In Europe, many but especially Copenhagen, Stockholm, Dublin, London. In the U.S.,

      1. Oh, yes! Copenhagen is great (if eye-wateringly expensive) and we did a great day trip to Malmo, Sweden.

    13. I visited 3 cities in Italy, flying in and out of Rome, by taking train and a pretty fancy double decker bus. I felt very safe and comfortable as a solo woman traveler, late 30s.

    14. Naples is fun to visit and has great transportation for day trips to the country, to islands, to the volcano. And very different from Vienna!

      1. Naples is indeed fun to visit and I enjoyed my time there very much, but it would be nowhere near the top of my rec list for someone who is just starting to explore being a solo female traveler.

        1. Yeah Naples is gritty. I enjoyed it too but definitely not an easy place to start solo travel as a woman.

    15. Most big cities in Europe will work for this.

      London, Edinburgh, Bristol, Norwich, York are all great places to stay with day trips in the UK.

      Paris, Brussel and Amsterdam are on the same express train.

      Cologne, Munich – excellent trains.

      Italy has fabulous trains. Pisa, Lucca, Florence or Bologna as base. From there you can reach Sienna, Cinque Terre, Chianti, Roma, Padua and Venice. (Northern Italy is better as a solo woman.)

    17. I don’t think anyone has mentioned Seville yet, so I’ll put in a plug for that — we went last year and absolutely loved it. You can go to Cadiz, Granada and Cordoba very easily and quickly by train. I believe you can also go to Morocco by train + ferry, although I imagine it would make for a long day. Very, very hot in summer though, so I recommend traveling in shoulder season.
      I’m a small city girl though and generally prefer smaller cities to the really big ones (I’m the poster above who also loves Florence, and I think Florence and Seville have a lot in common) so YMMV.

  3. Has anyone opened an LLC for their consulting work? I currently am paid hourly for consulting by the company I work with (I used to be full time there but changed to an hourly consultant since I now do part-time due to a medical issue). I’m wondering if being paid into an LLC for my consulting would allow me to expense work-related things to increase my take home pay. My marginal tax rate is very high (Boston area) due to my husband’s income. Has anyone done this and anything I should think about before going down this path, or any resources people have found helpful? I WFH although there is a local office – my medical issue that does not allow me to work large chunks of time so I WFH to break up my hours as needed for work. I wonder if I can expense things like my home internet, office supplies, etc. I have a dedicated office at home if that matters. Any info would be greatly appreciated!

    1. Ask your accountant but I think you can expense that anyway as long as you have a dedicated home office?

    2. I’m not a tax expert but would think you’d want to set up an LLC for liability reasons in any event?

    3. I was a sole proprietorship and switched to an LLC for my business. I am not an accountant and don’t do my own accounting. I was able to expense all the things you are talking about (home office) before becoming an LLC so I don’t think it matters? But I would think you would at least need to be a sole proprietorship / have some sort of business established. Being an LLC though saves us like 10k in taxes a year my husband who does our accounting says and protects me a ton from liability (I have employees etc )

    4. Yes I have an LLC for my consultancy. If you’re paid in a 1099 you can file a business return. I don’t think you need an LLC to do that.

      I have my LLC to protect my personal assets from liability from my business. I also carry professional liability insurance. You can use an LLC to defer your income for tax purposes but I don’t do that with mine.

      It’s not hard to form an LLC. I did mine via Legal Zoom while I was waiting for a flight.

    5. I did. I am a former attorney and thus quite risk averse, so I wanted that protection and the tax advantages. I am not a finance or tax person, so I made sure one of my first expenses was a bookkeeper and tax accountant (who focuses on small, mostly women-owned businesses remotely). She’s providing me all the tax and financial advice I could need at this stage.

      1. Thank you all for your replies! Would you mind sharing your bookkeeping/tax contact if she may be able to help me too if she covers Massachusetts?

    6. My reply got eaten, but yes, I did this for my solo practice. Former lawyer so very risk averse, but needed the financial guidance and hired a great tax accountant and bookkeeper. She’s walked me through all the things I’ve needed, what I need to do to write off things like my home office, etc. I didn’t want to do this as Pompom, Private Citizen; I wanted the clear delineation that this was all for my business (which is my employment).

    7. Way late here but I’m in the same situation and also live in the Boston area. I gross $120k in consulting fees and my husband makes about $280-300k salaried W2. I have:
      – a self employed 401(k) through Fidelity which is sort of logistically annoying but a huge huge tax shelter. Ask your accountant about it.
      – an itemized home office deduction. There is a LOT you can perfectly legally deduct. I keep detailed records.
      – if you can in any way justify a car for business expenses, it’s an easy deduction- I deduct mileage to/from Logan when traveling, all parking and tolls, OR repairs depending on the year (unless it’s paid for by the client of course).
      – a big % of my home internet and cell bill

      I’m not an LLC. I’ve done the digging and it doesn’t really make sense for me right now and is more paperwork, but might be in the future. It’s largely a liability thing and the way my consulting contracts work, I’m protected under my major client’s insurance.

  4. Perfect fit clearance golf polo follow up! I posted a couple days ago about trying to find a the brand that had the logo that looks like qlp (but all the same height). I tried Google photo and it suggested hieroglyphs- or art with scratches- no logos, no golf stuff. I checked the suggestions and the only one I can’t find online is the brand someone mentioned as “qp” – but I can’t find the logo for that brand anywhere. Are their products discontinued? Can anyone find a photo or eBay item?

    1. Hm – is it possible it was on clearance because someone had ordered a polo with a corporate logo on it but didn’t pick it up?

    3. Google image search allows you to add key terms like “logo” or “shirt” or “clothing” to the search, I’d try a photo with the shirt itself and the logo as crisp and defined as you can find and then also add the terms ‘golf shirt brand’ or similar and see if that turns up anything!
      But doing a quick search on Google, the way you describe it, it’s gotta be Phillip Plein–that’s almost it exactly, the reverse “P” that looks like a “q” backed up against a regular lower case “p”

  5. Met with our financial advisor yesterday and feeling motivated to make more progress towards our financial goals (build up savings, save for retirement, college). What are some money-saving tips that work for you?

    1. Just don’t buy sh*t.

      I know that might sound condescending, but there’s nothing more effective than just buying less stuff. I don’t do any of the games like no buy months because I have no problem buying things I really do need or make my life better, but I try to make the default option just not spending money. And then when I really do need or want something I buy it without feeling guilty.

      1. +1 and extend to “pay for fewer services.” There was a post recently asking which expensive, recurring services (lashes, leg waxes) to add to the rota. If you want to save money, the answer is none. Cheaper dupes at home can suffice if you feel that you need to take those beauty-enhancing measures – skipping them is a good option too.

      2. I hate it, but this is what I force myself to do too

        when I buy groceries, eat them! stay away from online shopping! automatic transfers to savings and retirement so I never “see” the money. pay yourself first. I mentally gamify saving too, try and make my savings goals more enticing than wasting it on dumb stuff.

      1. This is the way. I always say our money is untouched by human hands: The paychecks are auto-deposited, the savings is auto-transferred, the bills are auto-paid. The more you can automate, the easier it is to stick to your plan.

    3. Automate as much as possible. It is much easier to save if you have your paycheck directly deposited into your various savings accounts. If that isn’t feasible, set up automatic transfers to happen the day after your paycheck arrives.

      Also, look at what tax-advantaged options are available to you. Does your state incentivize 529s for college savings? Are you eligible for an HSA? Does your company match 401(k) contributions? Can you contribute to an IRA?

    4. I bring lunch to work (leftovers, a quick sandwich+ fruit) about 4 days a week. I think it saves me about $200-250 per month. The amount adds up to a fairly large emergency fund, replacement appliances, or…a long weekend in London, depending how I want to use it.

      1. This is the small splurge hill I’m willing to die on. I don’t want to deal with packing a lunchbox and hauling it around, and it’s never as good as a freshly prepared fast casual meal. I need this part of my workday to be reliably enjoyable. I’d rather cut back on drinks when dining out, paint my nails at home, and avoid DoorDash or Instacart type delivery services.

        1. That’s funny because I don’t mind packing a lunch if it means I can order takeout for dinner more often. The last thing I want to do when I get home is cook.

        2. Now that I’m hybrid and only in the office 2x a week I do buy lunch (previously brought brought it but hated it). I work near a sweetgreen, so I signed up for the Sweetgreen+ pass which gives me $3 off everyday. By going 8+ times a month, I save money and I ensure I’m getting a healthy, veggie filled lunch when I eat out.

          1. It costs me about $6-7 per serving to pack a gourmet salad for lunch, plus the time required to make it. Packing a lunch is somewhat less expensive than buying, but it isn’t free and doesn’t save as much as you’d think.

      2. Replying to the comments—I hate cooking after work. I actually just don’t eat dinner but buy chipotle most days for lunch fairly late. With a boiled egg and coffee for breakfast food works out to about under 20 a day.

        1. That’s a rough diet…. Will need to modify as you get older. Are you getting enough protein/nutrition?

    5. Do you have a good sense of where your money is going right now – I’d focus on that first (using old statements if you mostly buy with card can work). You want to rigorous, actual numbers – not “I think I spend about $1000/month on groceries”. You’ll get a sense of what you spend on “daily” expenses from just a few months but I read back through ~2 years worth and at least highlight the “predictable but less frequent or irregular” expenses (new tires, or that bigger trip, or sports equipment type stuff)

    6. You can get so much from the library besides books. I have canceled all of my news subscriptions and use the free access from the library. My library also has museum passes, baking equipment, tools, and instruments. I literally never ever buy books.

      I have switched to getting all of my groceries from Walmart. IME it’s even cheaper than Aldi and delivery is affordable with the Walmart+.

      I buy quick frozen options so that I can do that instead of takeout. If I really want takeout I go pick it up myself to save delivery fees. Pretty much the only takeout I get is sushi because I don’t make it myself.

      The only time I Uber is if it’s unsafe or truly impossible for me to walk, bike or take public transit.

      I buy most of my clothes secondhand. Most of my new clothing is cheaper options like old navy or Amazon. I splurge on a few nice pieces a year but that’s it.

      All of my makeup and skincare is elf. My makeup and skin and hair and nail routines work for me (this took time to figure out) but are streamlined. I don’t experiment (even though it’s fun to). I have cut back on all beauty treatments except professional haircuts and balayage. No nails, massages, facials, or brows.

      I’m not a Ramit Sethi devotee but I do like the spending rules idea. The three things I freely spend on are my hobbies (some are cheap and some are not!), things to make my life easier (parking spot, in unit laundry (a stand-alone unit that hooks up to the sink bc no real laundry), apartment location (small and no amenities but short commute to work, near public transit, near friends), premade food from grocery store, nice vacuum, nice / fast hairdryer), and socialization (usually happy hour so it’s cheaper, but if a friend wants to hang I don’t turn them down to save money). Things I don’t spend money on are travel (sadly, but not an option for me right now), the aforementioned takeout and books, coffee, and concerts (also sadly). I work FT and go to grad school PT and I’m self funding my way through grad school. So, my rule for myself is no non-wedding travel, no concerts, and no beauty treatments.

      I love bulk, despite my small apartment. I but 50 packs of generic cards on Amazon for like $15 rather than a $5 card each time. I make all of my coffee at home and buy it from Costco. Quick and easy meals (and hopefully healthy) that I can keep on hand: oatmeal + frozen berries, yogurt, eggs + whole wheat toast, whole wheat or chickpea pasta + sauce (with frozen veggies and meatballs). I also meal prep meals like healthyish soups and freeze them for later use.

        3. Amazingly I met my boyfriend at a wedding with eyebrows I tweezed myself and nails I painted myself!

      2. I would argue that the young and cash-strapped really ought to reduce their spending on wedding travel.

    7. Chapter 13 here. These are a few things I have implemented. Some are from my therapist. YMMV on a few.

      – Unsubscribe from all shopping emails

      – Pay yourself first – either have a portion of your paycheck sent to a different account entirely (ideally a HYSA at a different bank) or set up automatic transfers for after your paycheck hits.

      – Transfer funds to a separate account for non-monthly expenses, such as car insurance (mine is quarterly) and annual vet expenses. That way the money is set aside and can’t be spent.

      – Turn off Apple Pay or Google Pay. It will be slightly less convenient, but will ensure you are really sure about the purchase.

      – Start Christmas shopping now during sales with dedicated funds for gift spending. Either that, or transfer funds that will be dedicated to gift spending around the holidays.

      – Unsubscribe from anything you’re not using (like streaming subscriptions, clubs, etc). Consider re-bundling, such as the new Max/Hulu/Disney bundle.

      – Shop around for ways to slash certain bills. For example, I slashed my phone bill by switching from Verizon to Visible, which is powered by Verizon. I now pay $20/month and I haven’t noticed a difference at all. Shop around for car insurance savings.

      – Order groceries online and do pickup to keep your grocery bill exactly where you want it (no grabbing things that look good, can take things out of cart at checkout to keep the total under a certain amount).

      – Mindful Purchasing: This one may sounds extreme, but when making a purchase, ask yourself “Is having this item going to impact my financial freedom? Is it worth more than my well-being, my health, my relationships with my family and friends, and my commitments, all of which are impacted by my financial freedom?”

      1. Unsubscribing (or filtering) shopping emails has been very effective for me. All my shopping happens from a separate Gmail account, I filter things like Sephora and Ulta to a “beauty” label. If I need something, I browse that label to see if there’s a discount. As someone who previously was very susceptible to makeup/skincare deals, this has seriously reduced my random spending with little effort. I apparently missed a lipstick deal the other day: previous me would have absolutely randomly bought a bunch of lipsticks I don’t need.

        In short, by taking it out of my inbox, I only see the marketing when I choose.

    8. I have two suggestions. First, I don’t know how old you are, but my husband and I made getting out of debt our goal earlier in our financial life. I paid extra on our mortgage every single month, with the goal to pay it off before our oldest child started college. We got there one year early, and it was so liberating. That, plus state schools, athletic and academic scholarships, allowed us to easily cash-flow college.
      Second, in trying to figure out how much we will really need in retirement, I recently signed up for Simplifi, a Quicken app that lets you track your spending. It pulls most of our transactions directly from our credit card and bank accounts, but I tinker with them some to make sure everything that is tied to kids is classified as such, on the grounds that kid expenses will go away by retirement. It is so helpful to see where everything is going.
      As far as actually saving money, shop all of your “fixed” expenses-phones, insurance, internet regularly, and see if your utility companies have alternative rate plans. Our natural gas and power company both have alternative rate plans that I did not bother with for years, and it cost me a lot of money.

    9. I, along with husband (no kids) have been cleaning our place 2 bedroom 2 bathroom 1300 sf condo for over 14 years. We used to have a cleaning service and loved it, but an injury made it difficult to schedule cleaning since DH was home much more often. He is the super neat, tidy clean one, and though I am not as meticulous as him, I’m not super messy either. We can afford cleaning, and our standard of clean is usually quite high. Overall, I love the savings, and feel less guilty spending. I’m naturally frugal, so in my mind, this works, and I get into the rhythm of cleaning and decluttering as I go. The savings are more than enough to upgrade to premium flights:) DH does miss the cleaners, and we may go back to it one day, but we don’t mind cleaning (though when the weather is good and during vacations, we let go a bit.

      1. Adding that cleaning 14 years ago was 2 thousand a year, so with increasing costs, the savings are substantial over time.

      2. I had to let my cleaning service go around 2018 due to them being unreliable & breaking things and trying to hide the evidence.

        So my husband (and sometimes kids) and I have been cleaning our 2900 sq ft home ourselves for 6ish years now and it’s fine. We also do all the yard/garden work ourselves. I do miss walking in the door to a shiny clean house after work one day every other week, but I was glad I didn’t have to decide what to do about the cleaners in 2020!

        Our house is fine now and we don’t get in many arguments about cleaning. It helps that my husband has always been at least 50/50 with me on the home front, and currently a little more than 50 because he does most of the yard maintenance.

        1. I miss the walking through the door to shiny clean house feeling too! Though if I leave the house to run errands after cleaning, it feels great to come to a clean home.

    10. Making a habit of finding joy in mundane, small pleasures. A little philosophical quip I read somewhere really resonated with me. It framed US work culture as a cycle where working many hours is an expectation, and consumerism is seen as a release valve for the stress and exhaustion. But online shopping, fancy dinners or booking a weekend in Nashville add up if they are used to compensate for everyday life. So that feeling where I am stressed and try to make myself feel better by purchasing a thing/experience is the way I try to curb lifestyle creep. I can find lots of joy in trying a new recipe, streaming free stuff, and going on a local hike, or having neighbors over for a beer.

      1. I know it sounds flip, but having a 40 hour a week job that I love and a life I otherwise love (hobbies, local friends who I see often, local family, decent access to nature) really helps.

        I don’t travel much right now for financial reasons and I really only have the itch to travel in support of my hobbies. I only eat out socially, but I’m just as likely to have a friend over to split a bottle of wine as I am to go out to dinner with a friend. I can hike, ski, or go to the beach with about an hours drive. Of course are there “better” beaches and skiing if I really traveled? Yes. But the savings are great.

    11. I use the library for all books – I read 100+ books a year and haven’t bought a book in decades
      I rarely shop for clothes anymore, and generally don’t buy a lot of “stuff”
      Our grocery store has a gas program where you get points for shopping and can use the points for gas discounts at their pumps, and we use that pretty religiously
      We use a cheaper aftercare program (mainly for convenience not money reasons though — it’s the one at our school)

      The expenses that are worth it to me:
      Cleaning service
      All the travel, including paying to minimize layovers, paying to travel at reasonable times of day and (in some situations) paying for business class flights
      Takeout and delivery food – I hate cooking
      Activities and experiences for our kid

      1. this is another big one. Defining what is worth it TO YOU. Try to tune out the noise of what is ‘normal’. Which expenses make your life easier or more enjoyable, and which ones to you skip. If you have the luxury of financial choice, realizing that the most bang for your buck is such an individual preference is very powerful.

        1. +1000

          ways I save that don’t “hurt” aka make me feel like I’m doing without:
          -driving an old, used, bought-in-cash car (seldom used since city dweller, parking is $35 for the annual permit)
          -monitoring sales at grocery stores and stocking up on staples when they’re a steal – like I might get 10 jars of pasta sauce when Carbone goes on a great sale
          -keeping super easy frozen or pantry meals around so only order takeout as an intentional occasional treat (like sushi) as opposed to a “it’s late and we have nothing to eat” thing
          -can’t remember the last time I bought coffee out
          -do 95% of my own nail care
          -have a monthly cleaner and do in-between maintenance cleans ourselves

          that frees up disposable income for what I DO care about which is generally traveling in reasonable comfort, dining out, and yes, clothing.

          1. Oh yes we’re old car people too. We own ‘09 and ‘15 Toyota Camrys and just sold a ‘99 Camry (for a nice chunk of change) that honestly probably has another 10 years in it. Our cars are relatively low mileage for their age which helps them last longer.

          2. I drive a ‘02 Camry but I pay $300 a month for a parking spot one block from my apartment. When I had street parking I was hesitant to use my car and lose my spot. I now hike 2-3x a week thanks to having easy car access!

    12. Zero-based budgeting. It’s August 1, and I know I have $14,834 for the month to work with. (Self-employed so I have to pay my own taxes. I just allocated everything where it needs to go. My tax holding account, tax-advantaged and post-tax investments, grocery account (shared with partner), housing, subscriptions, pet stuff, etc. I now have all of $1300 left for the entire month but I know where all of that is going as well (except for the $500 of guilt free spending I allow myself). Some may find this ludicrous but it works for me. Every purchase gets categorized. I’m on the FIRE train and will retire from full time work in my late 40s.

    13. Go one month paying for everything in cash. No online shopping, no credit cards, no debit cards. Literal cash.

      A $100 purchase and a $10 purchase on a card feel exactly the same. They feel different when you’re counting out bills. It’s a very good reset.

  6. Anyone else loving how many mothers are competing at the top of their sports at the Olympics? There’s even a fencer competing 7 months pregnant. Gives me hope!

    1. Elle Purrier St. Pierre!!!! She set a record a year after having a baby, and said this of qualifying for the Olympics:

      “There are so many things women have to balance. I just had my first period since having a baby — and it was the week of the Olympic trials. Men don’t have to deal with that, you know? Women are awesome.”

  7. i am just a person online shopping, no skin in the game but if anyone is looking for shoes for work that feel professional but also yet summery, i was just looking at dolce vita and they have a lot of closed toe that still feel seasonal…. lots of cute things imo and decent price point.

  8. Looking for a unicorn — I’d love a merino/linen mixed open front hip length cardigan. I had one that I bought at Nordstrom Rack a decade or more ago. It was perfect for carrying around for too cold a/c, and could easily stuff in my tote when not needed. I apprently left it somewhere while on a trip, it definitely didn’t make it home with me. I have a conference coming up soon and know it would be a work horse for that alone. The one I had was black, but willing to take a leap on other neutralish colors.

    I’ve looked on Poshmark and Ebay for a similar one, but haven’t seen one like it.

  9. Does anyone have reccs for a very lightweight moisturizer with a short list of ingredients? Absolutely can’t have niacinamide, shea butter, or oils. Used to use la roche posay fluid but they added niacinamide. Took forever to find a dupe but eventually found fourth Ray lightweight hydrator…which was sadly discontinued. Am nearing the end of my stock and am desperate for a dupe, but can’t find anything similar with a short list of clean ingredients that won’t break me out/turn me bright red. Usual drugstore culprits like vanicream don’t work for me. So what do you guys all love and swear by? My skin is otherwise fine if I don’t put anything on it that it hates, but I definitely need a light moisturizer.

    2. I like the inkey list peptide moisturizer. I started buying it because I couldnt stomach the cost of the drunk elephant one anymore and now I like it better.

    3. I use the organic argan oil from Trader Joe’s for my face and it works great. Just 2-3 drops is enough for my face and neck.

    5. I have rosacea and use Farmacy Honey Drop. You didn’t ask this, but as a fellow red face person I will share what my derm told me which is that the problem was my face wash, not my moisturizer. She was right and switching to Aveeno Oat Calm cleanser on her rec was a game changer. I was highly skeptical but it was dramatic.

      1. Thanks for the cleanser recommendation for rosacea. Do you have other over-the-counter products for this? Dermatologists in my area are scheduling like a year out so I’m trying to manage my rosacea with Prosacea & redness products. It’s helping but it’s not perfect.

        1. Not what you asked for, but nothing OTC helped with my rosacea. I started on a compounded Oxymetazoline/Ivermectin/Niacinamide cream that has been life-changing. Seriously, so good. So when you’re able to get in with your derm – there’s good options out there!

        2. Also have rosacea and use the Aveeno cleanser. I also use azelaic acid from the Ordinary.

    6. I think you may have luck with Korean brands: Cosrx, Skin1004, Purito, Isntree have niacinamide-free options. Aveeno has too (I use their Dermexa Eczema rich cream in winter, but they have light options too). Cerave Hyaluronic serum is Niacinamide-free (at least EU version). Geek&Gorgeous Hydration Station is Niacinamide-free as well.

    7. Take a look at Avene. French brand, but you can buy it at Amazon and Ulta. They have products for extremely sensitive skin with a short list of ingredients. My super reactive skin loves it. I also agree about the earlier comment on face wash being a source of irritation. My derm also told me that.

  10. I wouldn’t buy a scuba dress, especially not to wear weekly. The fabric gets terrible pills and fuzz. I had 2 that I had to get rid of, and I’ve seen dresses on clearance that look bad just from being handled in the store.

    1. I love this in black for those days that you can’t decide what to wear. Literally any accessories will work with it to dress it up. Agree that for this fabric, it’s more a wardrobe staple vs a weekly wear. I dislike the blue version though because the seams are super visible in a way that looks cheap to me.

    3. I’m going to sound old and cranky but the consumer value/demand for quality fabric and quality construction is often not there. Higher end brands can often cheap out on fabrics/finishes/construction so it’s not always as easy as ‘just buy clothing from more expensive brands’. I remember going to buy clothing with friends in my 20s and checking tags for fabric content, care instructions, and looking at seams/sewing and they were confused as to what the heck I was doing and why.
      You can still find good quality basics at Uniqlo/Old Navy/JCrew Factory but you really have to pay attention to the makeup of what you’re buying. It’s frustrating and often means that I rarely buy things online anymore unless I really really trust the brand (rare) or I scope them out in person first and then wait for a sale to buy online.

      1. +1. I’m one of those people who examine all those seams and finishes too! I shop in person at gap, banana, and old navy and their basics are solid, though I agree that I only order online if I’ve seen the item in person. I sew some of my garments ( mostly dresses or skirts) from silk, or cottons like lawn, poplin, and voile. When I view seams and finishes of expensive garments from these same materials, the finish is not that well done. I’m fortunate that I have access to high quality fabrics and I wish I had more time to make things. I do get frustrated when something I make is well made, but the style I picked doesn’t work….than I feel I’ve spent quite a bit on materials and time, but at least I enjoyed the process:)

        1. It’s amazing that you can make your own clothes! My dream retirement hobby is to learn pattern making and sewing.

          1. Thank you! Sewing can be frustrating and rewarding and I enjoy it as a hobby, though I don’t sew things like t shirts or pants, I love making and designing my dresses:)

    4. Some ponte/scuba isn’t fuzzy like that. I have some blazers that wear like iron. But a $54 JCF dress certainly isn’t going to be that. Agree–on this one, you’re likely to have pilling in a few wears.

    5. I guess it depends on the scuba fabric. I had a dress in the late 90s from Escada (bought at that Neiman Marcus end of winter sale on super discount) that was part sweater knit and scuba and it perpetually looked new despite once a week wear for ages.

      1. Scubs and jersey are two fabrics that have a high degree of difficulty in terms of wear. The high end versions (Escada, Eileen Fisher, St. Johns) are great and wear like iron, don’t wrinkle, and are thick enough to skim over underthings and smooth everything out. The thinner low end versions show every lump and bump, cling in unflattering ways, and pill/run. Even the high end versions can be tricky to alter because of the fabric so it’s very much a ‘must try on in person’ for me.

    6. Don’t write off scuba completely. When it’s done well – heavy weight, good seams, it can last forever and I’ve never had it pill since it is more rubbery (… looks at 15 year old scuba dress in closet). I, however, am doubtful that any $50 dollar dress is going to last that long – regardless of material.

      1. Same, although I have an ancient no-name scuba dress from Burlington of all places that still looks amazing. Cost isn’t always an indicator of quality.

    7. I’m pretty sure “scuba” is a type of knit and doesn’t indicate the fabric composition or quality, so this can really vary. I’ve had scuba that wears like iron.

    8. I don’t like the look of it on me (jersey, merino, and the like drape better), don’t like how it doesn’t breathe, and think it often pills and looks BAD once it does.

      To each their own, though. And props to this one for not having a giant exposed zipper.

    9. To all who are expressing concerns about the $54 price point — this is a 50% off price. The original list price was $108. Today, the price is even less costly, with an additional 20% off, so these dresses are priced at $43.20. Not a bad discounted price from $108!

      1. I don’t mean to be unkind, but a dress even originally priced at $108 is not a high-end dress, and is unlikely to be made from high-end fabric like the Escada mentioned above.

        1. Agreed! I just wanted to update the impression that this is a $50 dress, which is significantly different from a $108 dress, that’s all!

  11. Prompted by comments here, I priced out CCRAs in my city. Yowza — they are not cheap. 100K buy-in and then maybe 3K a month. Definitely won’t plan to move to something like that until I need it (maybe age 75+, if family history is a guide). In the meantime, in my city, I could still afford a generic 2BR condo in a building with an elevator (which might work for the next 30 years, and give me something to sell for a CCRA entry fee and monthly rent. Is this how people do it? I am not expecting to acquire spouse / kids to take care of me and would plan to work until my full retirement age. No pension or retiree medical, just 401K.

    1. Yes, from what I’ve seen those who are smart about aging in place downsize to a more manageable property in their late 50’s/early 60s. They either stay there for some time with help (health aide, family) or move to a senior living facility once they need more full time support. Assets (homes, savings) are generally spent down/sold to allow for medicare to kick in funding.

      1. Medicare kicks in automatically at age 65 but doesn’t cover long term nursing care. Do you mean Medicaid? That’s what you go on once all your assets are gone.

        1. Correct – Medicaid covers some nursing facilities for people with essentially no assets. Medicare has nothing to do with it.

      2. Completely different experience in my family. Seven grandparents (including step/adoptive). One ended up in long-term care (dementia) but his wife stayed in their family house, one was in an assisted living facility the last six months of her life. The rest all stayed in their homes until days or weeks before they passed away with a combination of paid and family help. In each case, the paid help was much, much less expensive than even the lowest level of residential care.

        The problem with making plans is that there are so many factors we cannot control. You might drop dead at 73, You might live to 97. You might need help at 70 or 90 or never. As someone in my mid-50s, saying “oh I’ll move” is much easier said than done. I have two large dogs and a cat, an adult child who I anticipate may move home soon for grad school, a full-time job I intend to do for another decade at least, and I would get absolutely killed in capital gains taxes if I sold my house (bought in VHCOL city 25 years ago). So I am definitely not moving to a generic condo in my 50s or 60s. My parents are still in their house nearby in their late 70s and (if anything) I might end up needing to move in with them, but barring something unexpected that is at least 10-15 years away – they both remain healthy and active.

        As people weight in on this conversation, it would be helpful to know how hold you are. I would be curious as to what other people who actually are approaching retirement age are handling these decisions.

        1. yup. my parents plan was for my mom to retire at 64 bc at that time she would get her pension/health insurance for life at same price from her company. My dad was 69 at that time. He would’ve continued working for a few years part time. they decided that they didn’t want to own a second home, but instead would do some renovations on fully paid off house (mainly bathroom and kitchen for them to enjoy) and then spend time/money traveling. well my mom developed meningiomas, ended up in a wheelchair, never got to use that new bathroom they put in. she passed away at 65.5. they had to hire some help in her final years. now he is about to turn 75 and still working part-time, not because he needs to financially (which i realize is lucky), but to keep himself busy. he is still in his paid off house because any place he’d want to move would basically cost what he would get for the house, but with less space and he isn’t ready for that yet, especially since most of his friends are still in their homes.

        2. My husband is mid 60s and retired. I’m late 50s and partially employed (self employed). We have no immediate plans to downsize as we have one adult kid living here finishing her masters. She will start working this fall and will live at home with us (which we are delighted about) for at least a year. I have a 4th year undergrad kid too and want him to be able to live at home until he gets on his feet after graduating.

          So that’s a big factor for us. There’s an increasing trend (or at least I read so, and most of my friends are experiencing it) of adult kids needing to live at their parents home for a little longer as the housing market is so expensive. We are in a VHCOL area so I completely understand the struggle. I love having a full house so it’s great for me.

          1. Another factor for us is that I want to be the house my kids and their kids visit for years to come if they move away. That’s what my mom’s house was, and she never downsized for that reason, even though as a widow she may not have technically needed a 4 bedroom rancher (not a huge 4 bedroom, though.)

            We couldn’t achieve that if we moved to a 2 bedroom condo, or whatever people mean by “downsizing.”

      3. Mid 50’s and time to downsize? You must be young or maybe we are just not smart about downsizing then. My husband and I are mid 60’s, in good health, still working, entertaining, and have an adult child who just graduated college still home. No way we are moving to some little condo or retirement community. We have plenty of money to keep our house when we stop working so why downsize as long as our health holds up.

        2. Good grief, same. I’m mid 60s and Hubby is mid-70s and I expect we have at least another 10 years in our house. And even if somebody’s health starts to fail, we have room for live-in caregivers so that’s our first line of defense.

          We went to a birthday party last night at one of the fanciest retirement communities in town and it gave us the willies…

        3. I’m in my 30s, but I found the 50s comment strange, too. A lot of people would still have college or even high school aged children living with them. A friend in college was a late-in-life baby and had to get special permission to stay with his parents in their retirement community over summer breaks!

          I would consider 60s to be on the younger side for making this type of move.

      4. I’ll still have kids in high school in my mid/late 50s, and in college in my early 60a. I realize I had kids late, but not that late for my HCOL city. That seems so early to think about downsizing. I may choose to downside but it won’t be till my late 60s or early 70s at the earliest.

    2. I don’t plan to move into a retirement community until I need more intensive care but then I’m budgeting 10-20k/month for it. Actual assisted living (vs independent retiree home) is very expensive.

      My parents moved to my city in their early 70s and moved into a rental townhouse in an apartment community. They didn’t do it for financial reasons (they still haven’t sold their house) but they wanted maintenance free-living and they loooove not being responsible for repairs, lawn care, snow removal etc. That seems like a good compromise for people who are older but still healthy enough to live independently.

    3. Not all have buy-in fees. I have a relative in an assisted living community (that also has an independent living wing and a memory care unit) and it’s in the $6000-8000/month range depending on level of assistance required. There wasn’t a massive buy-in fees, just some smaller one-time fees.

    4. My mother is a CCRA ambassador. She received mmends it for everyone. After working a decade or two, topping out at $28k in the 90s, she easily financed the move once she inherited between $4 and 6MM from her father. Should be doable.

      1. I might be misunderstanding. She “easily” financed the move after inheriting millions?? That’s the solution?

          1. hahaha

            Isn’t that the republican plan to address the shrinking middle class?

            1) be rich
            2) don’t be poor

        2. Yeah, looking forward to my $6MM inheritance, which most people definitely have access to and isn’t unusual at all.

    5. My grandfathers facility had a buy in fee + was like 2k a month. You were locked into the rate that you moved in at and he spent a decade there mostly in his own apartment, but also with time in assisted living + medical and eventually hospice.

      He totally thrived there – moved in as a widower whose friends had all died. He ended up having a great social life, was involved in many activities, and the peace of mind of medical was great. He truly wouldn’t have lived til 93 if he had continued to live on his own. And he had so much fun there – his last years were some of his best. It totally changed the way I view these continuing care facilities.

      His 4 kids + 9 grandkids all lived nearby and visited weekly + did take him to appointments but they all still were working and raising kids and needed someone to help with the day to day.

      1. A widower (man) in a senior community must have been up to his eyebrows in … ya know…. women.

        1. Yeah, my dad was like the worst person on earth and even he managed to find a girlfriend in assisted living after my mom died.

  12. Paging the person with the query re lupus and hot yoga. I find the heat really allows me to relax, but I’m a California native living in a much colder climate so 28c classes are the only time I’m properly warm.

  13. Help me find a new career! I figured if anyone could help me brainstorm and think of new things, y’all could!. I’m early 40s and had a really good run in the past fifteen years in local government and non profits, even getting a few leadership positions. I am now a mid-level manager in government consulting organization and I am…good at my job, but (1) i daydream often about doing something different (2) am a bit cynical about my industry — both local government and trying to fix/impact local government (3) wary of how national political changes might impact these things (4) want to live internationally.

    I have small kids and a husband who is great but not the imaginative/adventurous one in the family, so I am also a bit constrained also by needing this thing to be somewhat well funded. I really want to figure out how we as a family could live internationally for 1-2 years. I figure with where we are as a family I have about five years of runway to try to figure this out. It just seems like my main skill sets are in my knowledge of local govt and my ability to manage people, which doesn’t seem enough. I know I’m selling myself short but kinda just keep going in circles when I think about the next five-ten years.

    1. Consider transitioning to a policy consulting role, like conducting evaluations of government programs. It’s remote-friendly and there are several large companies (RTI, Mathematica, JSI) that have international staff.

      2. If you want to do evaluation work you need to have at least a master’s degree in a quantitative social science, ideally a Ph.D. You can sometimes get hired onto these teams as a subject matter expert if you have a lot of experience and a recognizable name in the field, but you will mostly be doing interviews and site visits and writing background sections of reports. Some less reputable organizations will hire subject matter experts to do the actual evaluation work and it never ends well.

        1. For an opposite opinion I find that evaluations from SMEs are much better than any generalist program evaluator who doesn’t understand what is going on in the world at all.

        2. Not necessarily – I’m also an evaluation researcher and we have many senior people who have just BAs. We’re less rigid than many companies, though.

    2. Need basic info–what is your education? What exactly is your role at these local govt or NFP jobs? What do you like about what you do now–there must be something. My advice is to not get too wrapped up in the type of org you are working for but what you actually do–and THEN figure out what looks adjacent that has pieces of the parts you enjoy the most.

      I’ve worked for NFPs as well as private equity in companies that were in manufacturing, tech, and healthcare finance. If you only latch on to the employer or industry like that, you really constrain yourself (esp if it’s an industry you don’t enjoy).

      I also would think hard about the international thing. Maybe figure out WHERE first so you can back into how. Otherwise, you’re likely to keep drifting some more without an actual plan.

      1. I have a masters in public policy and some background in research and evaluation, though stopped coding years ago. Trying not to out myself but…I do like solving problems, I do think I’ve been considered a person who can get results in most of my roles. Best roles have been those that combined some element of fundraising and strategy.

    3. Are you a SME in anything? International governments are very interested in hiring SMEs from other countries that are pre-trained, especially in relation to things that are covered by the UN and UN bodies.

      I was very much a generic gov policy person, then I dove into a specific niche and it really changed the career opportunities available to me. I’ve gotten so many unsolicited international job offers.

      1. So my SME is in…re-entry and social services, especially post incarceration. Kind of America specific though maybe not. What was the niche you dove into?

        1. The niche I dove into is an element of Shipping that is due for convention soon. Incarceration definitely seems America specific. The UN and it’s Bodies post schedules and programs very far in advance so you can see what issues are likely due for convention or amendment.

    4. By internationally do you mean in Europe/Australia and using your home city as a travel hub or do you mean a bigger difference like a developing country?

      Governance is an issue addressed by many IOs in developing countries but that’s a different lifestyle.

      Start by looking at UN job site as well as municipal issue specific IOs. That will give you an idea of what kinds of skill sets are in demand.

      2. Yes one of my problems is that I’m not quite sure what we want internationally, so need to do some more thinking on that.

    5. I have a public sector background and the problem with local government is that it’s very place-specific. Most other countries have their own systems you’re not knowledgeable about. The exception to this is if you’re the rockstar in a town or service that’s generally acknowledged as world-leading, but if that’s the case the offers to show other countries how it’s done will come to you. (I’m in the UK and that would be pretty much the way to get an immigrant a work visa for the job – by showing nobody in the country already could do it.) Is there any possibility of saving up to take a sabbatical? You could perhaps live abroad for a year before your kids are in school and if you don’t have to work there are countries where your money will go a long way. Another option is to explore if you have any options for citizenship abroad; if you can find a suitably recent ancestor in for example Ireland you may be able to get the right to work anywhere in the EU, in which case being a great people manager might be enough.

    6. I’m former USAID and international NGO, current domestic local government.

      There are definitely INGOs with field positions in whatever your subfield is. Look into those.

      If you want to take the federal government route, many USAID field positions are FSOs but not all. Certain departments rely heavier on PSCs which are all non FSO. other departments also have lots of institutional contractors, for long term (years) or temp (months) projects. Also lots of contractors employed by contracting companies working on USG funded projects but not working for the USG.

      UN has lots of contact appointments too (as in the term length is contract, but you don’t work for a contractor, you’re more like a PSC).

    1. Smitten Kitchen has a corn chowder salad that looked yummy, I plan to try it this weekend.

    2. I shuck it, blanch it, cut the kernels off the cob, and freeze it in quart sized bags to use throughout the year. Favorite applications include in enchiladas, in a pasta sauce with lots of butter and shrimp, and alongside meatloaf and mashed potatoes. If I had a good cornbread recipe I’d add it to that as well.

    3. Throw it and some shrimp.on the barbie and just smother the corn in butter. I don’t see any reason to mess with fresh sweet corn.

    5. I just eat it plain (roasted, grilled, boiled, microwaved, whatever). If you’re going to cook with it, you might as well use frozen, since it’s frozen immediately after being picked, which keeps the sugar from turning to starch and preserves the vitamins, plus it saves the work of getting it off the cob.

    6. For just individual portions, tossing a few buttered/salted/peppered half ears of corn in the air fryer is easy and delicious.

  15. i am always on a quest to look more polished. A big suggestion i have read is to tailor things. Other than getting things hemmed, i have never been happy with the results of a more complicated tailoring. am i going to the wrong place or is this a common feeling?

    1. If something needs anything more complicated than a hem, sleeve shortened, or straps taken up, I (1) have to really love it to proceed, and (2) take it to the tailor to have a look before I take the tags off.

      Most success is taking fabric in from the back of a shirt (giving it a waist) and taking the waist. Anything involved in the shoulder or bust (like darts in the front) I just skip.

      1. I’m short-ish (5’4) and my two most common tweaks in tailoring are to take things up in the shoulders, and hemming length in sleeves/pants/skirts. The easiest way to see if it’s feasible to take something up at the shoulders is to pinch/gather the fabric up at your shoulders. If you can pinch/fold up the amount of fabric that needs to be removed and it fixes the issue without making the armholes too tight then you can easily tailor it. That’s about a $20-$30 fix in my area.
        Darts are definitely more complicated though!

    2. It’s hard to find a good tailor. My best experiences have been with local dressmakers as they are much more knowledgeable than the seamstresses at the dry cleaners or similar.
      Unfortunately it also tends to work best when you have a good idea of what you want done. So much of tailoring is about making judgement calls on what looks ‘best’ on your body and that’s very different for every person.
      It also helps to know what is and isn’t easily fixed by tailoring. It’s almost impossible to tailor knits, if your garment doesn’t have seam allowances it might not be able to be let out, etc.

    3. Very common. I went all in on tailoring in my early 30s and was never happy. My response was giving up on full length pants and structured sheaths. My dresses are now merino knits or ponte—stretch. My skirts are a bit more structured, and my tops are purchased to fit. If I wear denim it’s stretch skinny jeans.

      Maybe it works for narrower fits. I’m an hour glass size six.

    4. What about the results have you been unhappy with…the quality? The lack of improvement in how it looks?

      I sew, so I do my own “tailoring” as needed. Nothing complicated, because I’m neither ambitious nor very picky. What I’ve done this summer: added an additional buttonhole and button to a couple of linen shirts that had very low neck openings (why?). Opened up side vents on some shirts to give more space at the hips (I’m a pear). Sewed closed side slits on dresses that went up way too high. Narrowed gaping armholes on a couple of sleeveless items. Narrowed side seams on a couple of too-boxy shirts (pear, with a small bust and big hips). Added waist darts to pants to make the waist fit (see, pear).

      I’m happy with all these changes and having my clothes fit better or not having to worry about low necklines or high slits. I doubt the changes make me look more polished.

      1. I also sew and do my own tailoring. I do all of these things and additionally add princess seams or take in waistbands. A few times I have narrowed the shoulders in blazers to make them fit me better. However, all of these are only worth the effort for me if the item otherwise fits me well to start with. Trying to tailor a garment that is the wrong size or cut for a different body shape does not usually result in something that flatters me

    5. In my experience with tailoring, it’s very powerful for pants, dresses, etc to be the correct length for you. I’ve also had good luck having them take up straps for a tank dress (i.e. pull up the straps and cut the excess). It also works well for taking in dresses at the side. Beyond that, no, it can get exorbitantly expensive. Things like fit in the shoulders, jackets, etc are often so expensive so as not to be worth it, because they’d have to take apart the garment.

      1. Messing with shoulders and bustlines generally doesn’t work. Nipping in under the arms and adjusting the waist and hips via the side seams or darts are usually successful. I am extremely long-waisted, so the only way I can wear dresses is to have the poof taken out where the hips of the dress hit at my waist. Sleeve hems are also important. Tapering in straight skirts makes a huge difference.

    6. Tailoring only works if you have a baseline understanding of garment construction such that you purchase garments with tailoring in mind and are willing to spend the money on someone who has the skills.

    7. I get the waist taken in for skirts and dresses. As a pear this is the only way I can buy structured workwear. Adjusting the waist doesn’t work with all fabrics though. A good tailor will tell you when it won’t come out well. The dry cleaners do a fine job with simple hems but I see a speciality tailor for anything complicated (wraps, pleats, etc.) or related to my waist.

    8. I get darts in the back of all my petite blazers so I don’t look like I am wearing a tent in order to accommodate my belly. I go to a local seamstress and pay as much for tailoring as I do for the blazer. It is 100% worth it for me. I only started getting regular manicures with dip polish in the past few years and it makes me feel put together. I didn’t need that as much when my hair was ful and think and my body fit and trim.

  16. WSJ reporter Evan Gershkovich and former Marine Paul Whelan have been released from Russia, along with two others! As someone who has been reading Brittney Griner’s memoir, they have been top of mind for me. So happy they are coming home.

    3. Happy for them and their families of course, but this seems like a bad precedent. Russia liked the deal they got for Griner, so they picked up a couple more spare Americans, and now they know this works. In the long run, letting governments know the fastest way to get away assassinating your rivals abroad is to snatch a couple spare US citizens, only worsens security

      1. It should be a warning for all Americans to NEVER visit Russia, under any circumstances. It’s not worth it, and they don’t deserve our tourism anyway.

      3. This is always the challenge with kidnapping. Do you pay the ransom of let your person die? There is not right answer.

        But when I was told I had to go to central Mexico for work at a time when foreigners were being kidnapped pretty regularly, I told my boss I was only going if he bought insurance that would cover my ransom (and then when he found out how much that insurance would cost he and the client decided it was not so important that someone go personally!) Because theory aside, I was not interested in being murdered.

  17. How do campaign rallies work? I just signed up to see Kamala in Philly next Tuesday, what should I be prepared for? I assume a lot of standing and waiting. I missed the chance to see Obama in 2006 and I’m not missing out again! Any tips?

      1. I don’t know if it’s always the same but I went to a “get out the vote” in westchester last fall where Biden was and we waited for hours on a long line and then passed through security. I would think of it as flying, small bag or clear one, dont bring a lot with you, comfortable shoes.

      3. I just signed up for the Raleigh rally but they still haven’t announced the time and location. I understand you have to be cleared in advance so I expect the campaign to send more details soon.

    3. Correct, be prepared for lots of waiting. But these events are very fun! You can make a funny or serious sign to hold (Cat Lady for Kamala, HARRIS, etc.).

    4. She’s a really good speaker and Mr. Emhoff was really personable (he made rounds in the crowd before and after she spoke). It was worth standing in line in the rain for an hour. The lines will probably be longer now (I saw her speak in 2022 right after Roe was struck down). If you know any local elected folks who will be there, see if you can hang with them. It won’t necessarily get you access to speak/shake hands, but will get you a less chaotic spot once you’re in the door.
      Resist the temptation to have your phone out and recording. Instead, be in the moment and enjoy.

  18. In an online discussion about non-prescription alternatives to ozempic, a commenter recommended a supplement called Ovasitol. I’ve only been able to find info about it on a PCOS website that’s actually a storefront for PCOS-related supplements; it turns out it’s the brand name for an Inositol supplement. It claims to reduce cravings by balancing hormones.
    Does anyone have experience with this?

    1. Hi, that was me! I do not have PCOS but was recommended to take Ovasitol by my reproductive endocrinologist during IVF and early pregnancy, as there is some research suggesting it reduces the risk of gestational diabetes and other insulin-related issues for some women. (I am not diabetic or pre diabetic but did have diet controlled gestational diabetes with my first pregnancy, when I did not take an inisitol supplement; we did IVF for secondary infertility. It took a long time, but I am currently pregnant with normal glucose numbers so far). I think I mentioned that you should discuss with your OB or PCP whether it’s right for you, as I’m sure it’s not right for everyone.

      FWIW, I find that it does actually help with my sugar cravings and fasting glucose numbers, both inside and outside of pregnancy. It absolutely is not a cure all, just a helpful complement to dietary changes. But again, I’m not sure it’s a “right for everyone” product, and it’s expensive, so talk to your doctor.

      1. I don’t think you reported glucose issues, but often cravings reflect big spikes and crashes, and inisitol products can help blunt those. You can buy a glucose monitor for $40 to see if this is an issue for you. You’d test when you wake up and 1 or 2 hours after you eat something and see what your glucose level is.

        If it is an issue, it may also be helpful to look at Glucose Goddess’s materials to see if anything she suggests works for you. (Again, I am not even close to prediabetic looking at A1C, but my body really feels the spike/crash if I eat simple sugars, and then I crave more simple sugars…vicious cycle!)

    2. My doctor recommended it for PCOS. My appetite was low when I started it so I can’t report on whether it helped with that symptom or not. I’ve had better luck with berberine for cravings and weight. Metformin helped with weight but actually increased appetite for me.

    3. I took Inositol for PCOS-related fertility issues and was also prescribed Metformin, which can sometimes be used to reduce appetite. However, I didn’t notice any appetite-related changes with either. The only thing that reduced my cravings was being forced onto a diabetic diet because I had gestational diabetes. I had to test my blood sugar with a monitor that immediately uploaded my results to my physician in real time, so there was high accountability. It was hard, it sucked, but once I got used to it, I didn’t really crave carbs or sugar as much as before. This would have to be a lifestyle adjustment for life though, because as soon as I got off the diabetic diet after giving birth, the cravings came roaring back and so did my high blood sugar.

    4. OP here. I didn’t remember that the discussion I referenced was from this site! That’s kind of funny.
      Thanks for the replies. My issues are mostly menopause related, and I take HRT. I’ll discuss with my doctor at my appointment this month.

  19. I posted the other day about my boss dangling a promotion in front of me for a year, not giving any guidance on how to get there, and then telling me this week he has another person in mind for the role. For that reason and others it’s time to move on and I’m getting started on the job search. 

    I find myself in this position where I feel like I’m way over qualified for the type of role I’m in and have been in, but I don’t feel quite qualified enough for the next step in the direction I want to take. I’m sure part of my problem is not having enough confidence and needing to think more like a mediocre man, But there are some areas I’d like to do more in and I don’t have direct experience. I’ve been in the workforce too long for the lower level roles to get that experience but don’t have the experience to get a job at the level I think I’m otherwise ready and qualified for. 

    How have you dealt with this if you’ve been in this position? Also I am happy to provide more details if I’ve made this too vague, just trying not to bore you all to death. And I’d love to generally hear how people have handled this, even outside the industry and roles I’m in.

    1. You leave for the title you want. If your employer has repeatedly shown you that they’re not going to give you the opportunity you’ve earned, you believe them and find it elsewhere. Sorry, but that’s the truth.

      1. Yes! For sure! I’m working on that. I’m just feeling stuck in this place where I have way too much experience for the job I’m doing now but feel like I don’t have enough for the ones I want.

        1. Could education replace the experience you think you lack? What about volunteer or freelance or consulting work to fill in the gaps?

    2. You apply for things even if you only have most but not all the requirements.

    3. Get a job coach. They can help you rewrite your resume, LinkedIn and interview prep, especially as a lot has changed in the job market recently. . Looks to me like a framing and confidence thing. Don’t feel you have to do all this yourself. Plus they might have good feedback if there are any gaps that need to be addressed, especially as it relates to marketability. Good luck!

    4. Think like a mediocre man. The next step you want to take? You’re qualified, and if you’re not, you have potential so you’ll learn on the job.

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