Tuesday’s Workwear Report: Silk/Cotton Poppy-Print Blouse
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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
The print on this button-up blouse from Me + Em is so pretty that I want to buy it by the yard. And if the fabric itself weren’t enough, the gorgeous details on this shirt make it even better. The cuffs, the tiny pouf at the shoulder, the ruffles around the neck? Perfection.
Pair this with a great pair of trousers and you’ve got yourself a perfect summer outfit.
The top is $295 at Me + Em and comes in sizes 0-14.
Sales of note for 7/15/25:
- Nordstrom – The Anniversary Sale is open for everyone — here's our roundup!
- Ann Taylor – Semiannual sale, extra 50% off sale styles
- Banana Republic Factory – 40-60% off everything + extra 50% off clearance
- Boden – 10% off new womenswear with code
- Eloquii – Limited time, 100s of styles starting at $9
- J.Crew – End of season cashmere sale, take 40% off select cashmere
- J.Crew Factory – All-Star Sale, 40-70% off entire site and storewide and extra 60% off clearance
- M.M.LaFleur – Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
- Rothy's – Up to 50% off seasonal faves, plus new penny loafers and slingbacks
- Spanx – End of season sale
- Talbots – All markdowns, buy 2 get 1 free, on TOP of an extra 40% off (last day is 7/15)
I just signed up for Factor meals. Who has experience with them?
I’m decent with meal prep, but not decent with eating my own food, and salads don’t really work for me (I like hot food if I have options.) And there’s only so much chipotle I can eat in a week. Thoughts on your experience is welcome, or better meal delivery services in the DMV!
They’re fine for a little while but get boring. I prefer hello fresh’s approach, you can get premade meals there and also really easy DIY meal kits.
We’re longtime Territory subscribers and enjoy. They’re not cheap, but we’re a busy family and it does keep me eating much healthier. I don’t eat red meat and don’t like paying $15 for beans, so there is less variation for me (lots of chicken, a few seafood dishes), but I don’t mind having the same meals frequently.
I think they’re great actually. Pretty tasty and i’m fussy about reheated food. A friend gifted me two weeks after I had surgery. It’s not cheap but it’s certainly cheaper (at least for me) than eating out or delivery. I have looked into doing it again but the meals while “healthy” are reasonably caloric imo.
I was underwhelmed. The food quality was fine but the meals were bland, at least the vegetarian options. But I have also come to the realization that frozen/pre-prepared meals are just not my jam so YMMV. If I’m low on time or energy I would rather make PB&J.
I used factor for about a year. At the start I LOVED them! Delivery is easy and well done, and the meals are very tasty. I really got sick of them though. They don’t rotate recipes nearly enough. I actually was thinking about re-subscribing about a month ago but I checked the site and the meals are… still exactly the same…
A great option until you get tired of them though!
I’ve been using Factor for the last two months and so far I like it. The meals are tasty and it’s keeping me from spending $$$ on unhealthy fast food when I need a quick option. My PCP did advise that Factor meals can be high in fat so she suggested going for lower fat options for my other meals.
I really enjoyed them for what my goal was — losing weight and eating more veggies. They can get boring, but I don’t really make a huge variety of meals for myself either. I gave myself a couple of meals a week to eat something else because I knew I would still want to eat out or make something different.
At the ripe age of 66, I’ve decided I am going to learn to swim. I’ve always been afraid of the water, due in part to how bad my eyesight is without glasses (and my eyes don’t tolerate contacts). Combining the fear of water with how vulnerable you feel when you can’t see has prevented me from tackling this, but I’m committed to conquering stupid fears that have hurt my quality of life. Any (gentle) tips for success?
You can get prescription goggles. I don’t have them, but I’m aware they exist.
Prescription goggles do not even require a prescription. You can get them OTC from places like Swim Outlet. Search for “corrective goggles” and plug in your prescription. Of course they are not perfect, but they are also not expensive ($25’ish) and could help.
Yes before LASIK I had a pair of prescription goggles from speedo. Not expensive! Obviously my vision was not as clear as it would have been with glasses, but they work.
I hope you love swimming!! Congratulations on taking the plunge (sorry)
I’d save my prescription goggles in a fire, that’s how much I love them. I’m a keen very short-sighted open water swimmer who can’t wear contacts, and I can now go out safely solo – before I would lose my bearings and my stuff regularly. Many thanks to my father who found out they existed and bought me my first pair back when they were a lot harder to find, and then ferried me to and from pools and beaches all over the place.
My eyes are terrible (-7.5/-8.5 is my contacts prescription), and I often swim without contacts. I wouldn’t do open water swimming, but if you’re in a pool, especially during lap swim while lanes are delineated, there’s just not really much need for your eyes? However bad they are, you’ll be able to locate the lane markers and pool edges.
Congratulations, this sounds amazing for you. Find a good swim teacher – ask at your local pool; you might consider looking for an adult swim class.
If your hair is colored or curly you’ll probably want extra protection like a swim cap; there are also swim shampoos and conditioners that handle chlorine better.
Wear flip flops until you get to the pool.
Semi off topic, but if you’re at the stage where you need cataract surgery, you can often combine that with corrective surgery and lose glasses entirely.
I would definitely treat yourself to prescription goggles. Sport RX has been good for me for that kind of thing. Otherwise, don’t be afraid to change instructors if the first is not the right fit. Consider setting a goal (eg swim with the grandson in Hawaii next year) to look forward to.
Just out of curiosity, is there a reason you didn’t want to swim as a kid or was it fear of water then too?
Also, I should have added GOOD FOR YOU. It’s amazing to acknowledge and commit to conquering a fear like this and also amazing to pick up a really valuable life skill in your 60s.
OP here – I grew up as part of very large, noisy, and pretty broke family. No money for swim lessons, neither parent was a great swimmer, and in a very poor school district that did not have a pool, so no school swim lessons (which is how my husband learned to swim). No access to a pool, so if I was ever in the water, it was in a lake, where my bad vision and an anxious nature combined to have me shivering in the shallows!
Makes sense. I had a typo in my question and meant to say “learn” instead of “want.” Good for you for doing this now.
New lap swimmer here – go for it! You can do this! I am in my mid-40s and until recently could not swim with my face in the water and could only go under briefly if I held my nose and didn’t try to exhale.
A good coach is invaluable, as is being easy on yourself while you learn. I have been practicing for about 3 months and am just within the last few weeks getting things to click. I am working on front crawl and it’s starting to be fun rather than frustrating and scary. Personally, I needed to slow down and not try so hard. I was trying to kick way too much, was gasping for air, torquing my neck in an attempt to breathe, and felt like I was on the edge of panic when I first started. Now, I know to kick waaayyy less (and more gently), I am aware of my posture and form and can self correct, I can control my breathing and don’t feel massively fatigued at the end of every 25 yard lap.
Take a brief rinse in the shower in your suit before you get in the pool; it not only rinses off lotion, sweat, and stuff that shouldn’t go in the water, it helps your skin and hair not absorb so much chlorine from the pool water because they will be already wet with normal water.
If you are swimming indoors, get clear prescription goggles. Tinted ones are too dark, like wearing sunglasses inside. If they fog up, use spit on them before you put them on. Really – just spit on the inside of the lens, smear it around really good (I literally use my tongue to do this in my pre-swim shower), brief rinse in cool water, then on my face. No fog at all.
If you hate putting your face in the water try learning the back stroke or side stroke first. I’ve been swimming since age 4 and still hate the front crawl
Congratulations! Good for you and good for anyone with whom you share this news. A lot of us have something we’d like to learn that feels hard and it helps to see another adult taking steps to learn something new.
My best advice would be to ask around for a good teacher. And don’t be afraid to switch teachers/pools if the first one isn’t for you. I’d go with a pool with a lifeguard on duty or at minimum, a private swim instructor who is also lifeguard certified.
If you also go to the pool with a loved one who will help you: a kickboard is a really helpful tool to practice outside of lesson time. One can hold it out and kick, practice putting one’s face in the water, and move on to holding it further from one’s body, with one arm, etc.
My former boss learned to swim in his late 60s, in retirement, and it’s been great for him!
Our Y has a woman who works with a lot of autistic kids and adults and is just a blessing. She does a lot of solo lessons and is amazing. Someone like that may be at your Y — not the swim team or tot in diapers swim teacher, but someone for the rest of us. They can also listen to your fears and work with you (like in the warm pool vs the much colder pool, no diving, etc.).
I used to be a big swimmer but now just do breaststroke with my head up out of the water b/c I don’t like water getting in my ears. Many lap swimmers do NOT like having slower people swimming and are not shy about sharing their feelings; you just need to claim your place in the water.
FWIW, my pool has “fast” lanes and “slow” lanes during lap swim. Definitely don’t get in the fast lane if you’re not fast!
Congratulations on tackling a fear and going outside your comfort zone to learn something new! I agree that finding a good instructor at a Y or somewhere similar makes all of the difference. The nice thing about swimming is that you can just go at your own pace whenever you get the hang of it.
I taught swimming in college- my oldest student was 87!
Let your instructor know that you’re nervous. The hardest part is relaxing your body so that you can float- once you’re comfortable with that, it’s just moving your arms and legs. Its worth also asking for explicit water safety training- knowing a deadman’s float and how to bob and rescue backstroke and how to tread water give you a lot of options for getting out of the water if you get uncomfortable or get into trouble.
You sound like you’d benefit a ton from prescription goggles like another poster mentioned. Make sure after your lessons you go do something you enjoy, like going to a nice cafe for lunch.
I have a question that someone here may have an answer to: Where do you buy simple gold pendant chains? I don’t need anything special, except I do want something that won’t break and lose my pendant!
(Or I guess I should say I want one that won’t break as easily as the one I’m replacing, since after the horror story about slash proof purse bags, I wouldn’t want to wear any necklace that doesn’t break at all!)
I kind of looked into this also but for silver or white gold – it isn’t easy. First figure out how long you want (prob 16-18”) and then honestly I’d ask a local jeweler. You might find them at mejuri or nordstrom had some from vinader also.
Thank you! Now I’m admiring Vinader in general
I was going to suggest Monica Vinader. I have a few simple necklaces that are in great shape with daily wear
I go to the local jewlery shop in my town for this. I appreciate being able to see them and feel the weight and try on for length in person.
Local jeweler for better quality chains. Be prepared to pay. I’ve seen them on Etsy, but am uncomfortable spending that much on an unknown.
I agree with this. I’ve had a lot of missed (but many hits!) w Etsy. If you already have the pendant in mind, take it to a jeweler and see what styles of chain, plus length, speak to you. An example is I have a round gold art nouveau locket and for about ten years I failed to love it w a 16/18/20 inch chain, but I love and wear it just fine w a 30 inch chain.
I have the 18k gold chain from Tiffany’s for the cross my grandma gave me for first communion. The chain has held up well to being worn 2-3x per week. Price is in line with similar options.
I liked the one I got from Quince. People have mixed feelings about Quince, but I’ve been very happy with their simple gold pieces.
Costco!
Ross Simons has good deals on chains of all types.
This top is gorgeous.
i agree!
If I had a spare $295 to spend on a work top (full remote over here), this is what I would buy. I love the sleeve length, too: so perfect for summer.
They have some in other patterns that are on sale now in the $150-200 range if that’s better
if only it didn’t have puff sleeves; great on others, terrible on me
I love it! The print, cut, etc. all work so well together.
Would anyone be willing to share their experience with bre*st reductions and tummy tucks? I’ve always been large of chest, and now that I’m done having kids and my weight is stable, I’m looking into having a reduction. I also have some excess skin/fat on my stomach from weight loss that I’m thinking about taking care of at the same time. What is recovery like? How did you handle time off work? Any regrets?
Not me, but our sitter had a reduction (just a reduction, no lift) in her early 50s. We’ve got a teen/tween, and she walks dogs on the side so very active and in shape. She was out for 3 weeks (she scheduled it over the Christmas holidays and we gave her the time off paid) and said she could have probably worked after 2 weeks but not walked the dogs. She is thrilled with the results and wished she’d have been able to do it sooner but cost was a big issue for her.
I’ve had a consult for a tummy tuck/lipo. The doctor told me to expect a ~4 week recovery, longer with any complications. I’ve decided to skip for now, I just don’t have the time to do it and frankly it’s a gory surgery that I’d rather wait to do until my kids are out of the house.
An acquaintance had a reduction and was considering a tummy tuck. She was so happy she did the reduction, but was surprised (and I was too, when she told me!) how much recovery was involved in the tummy tuck. My limited info is that the two are in different ballparks in terms of how invasive the procedure is and how much recovery/pain is involved.
I don’t know anyone who’s regretted a reduction
Reduction: amazing! No regrets whatsoever. I was in and out of the surgery center in a few hours. I was back at work a week later, but only “desk work.” It is so amazing to no longer have back pain. I enjoy running now! I can wear whatever tops I want! I buy cheap bras!
Tummy: I discussed with the surgeon and decided against it. Major surgery, major recovery, more risks.
I focused on improving my eating and exercise habits. My belly is still smaller, but still soft and covered in stretch marks. I’ve chosen to accept it.
As an FYI for anyone who has considered it, I did cool sculpting not long after having my son. It did work well for getting rid of fat (as long as you do the post-procedure care) but did nothing for the loose skin. I would NOT do it again now knowing what we know about risks/side effects. Apparently there are skin tightening lasers that do that moderately well but it is $$ ($4-5k).
I would love to do something about the loose skin around my belly button. I wish there was a non-surgical way to address that. If anyone knows of anything let me know.
I had a reduction when I was 18, and it’s still one of the best things I’ve done for myself; it really improved my QOL. Recovery was relatively pain-free after day 2, and I was back to normal activities within a few weeks, although I wouldn’t necessarily look to that as guidance just because I think recovery from anything is easier when you’re that young – I had tougher recoveries from much more minor procedures in my 30s. FWIW my weight has gone through some ups and downs since – college/law school 40, some weight loss in my 20s, pregnancy in my 30s – but my cup size/general proportion to the rest of my body has always stayed stable.
I had a tummy tuck about ten years ago and not gonna lie — it was gruesome! But I am delighted with the results and would totally do it again. So no regrest!
I will tell you what I tell everybody contemplating cosmetic surgery — take the recovery time your surgeon gives you and double it. I was off work for four weeks and was glad to have every day of it. I could probably have limped back after two weeks but I still had drains in place and it would have been really difficult. I took sick leave after quietly verifying with HR that sick leave covers elective surgery.
Also, believe it or not, they do this huge gruesome surgery on an outpatient basis and I was very happy I decided to spend the first couple of nights in a surgical aftercare facility. It’s like a cross between a hospital and a cruise ship and they took really good care of me. Expensive but worth it. This is the one I used: https://www.beverlyhillssurgicalaftercare.com/
I did a breast aug and mini tummy tuck with lipo last summer. The breast aug was easy-peasy, no pain, no discomfort. I was back to my old self (but fuller–I’ve never been big at all) two days later.
The tummy tuck and lipo were a major surgery, and the tummy tuck did not hurt, but I had a scar that ran from hip to hip, under my bikini. I haven’t had kids and am mid-40s. I did it because I had significan scar tissue from an appendectomy that went wrong (they left a surgical sponge in me!) when I was in HS. So–for 30 years, I’ve had this uncomfortable scar tissue, and I am so glad it’s gone.
Recovery involved about a week of painkillers and about two weeks of laying down. Really–not being vertical, being flat. I also had to do a lot of lymphatic self-massage, because you’re swollen and your belly is jelly. A lot of that was due to the lipo, not the tummy tuck. I finally have a flat tummy for the first time since my late teens/no bump from the scar tissue, and it was worth every penny.
I was between jobs at the time (intentionally) and it was a great time to do it, zero regrets. Like SA, i paid to have a recovery nurse with me around the clock for two days, and it was super-worth-it.
I found really helpful resources to understand what to expect on the web and on social media (TT and Insta).
I think there are a few readers here who work in disaster response and emergency preparedness. Can you share more about where you work (for the feds/state/county or private entities) and what kind of background you have? My background is in public health and I currently work in policy research, but I’m considering whether I want to take my skillset in a different direction. Disaster response investigation appeals to me – the research, information gathering, and dissemination of findings to inform policy. I don’t have skills in ground logistics and wouldn’t be as interested in that. How would one begin to explore this?
And yes, I’m aware of the prospects for this field right now (my own field is badly affected by DOGE). Just beginning to probe ideas.
I work at the city level. I kind of fell into the field at 22 as a federal contractor and fell in love with the work. I wanted to leave DC and move back to my home city, and this have ended up at my city’s OEM for the past 7 years.
Many public health departments have some sort of public health preparedness or disaster response team, given your background that might be a good fit. Likewise, any major hospital has at least one EM on staff, if not an entire department. I have several friends who left my office to go into hospital EM.
Obviously this is a bad time to be a fed (and the hiring freeze was just extended), but in normal times I’d suggest looking into HHS ASPR, and depending on your degree the Public Health Service Commissioned Corps. Likewise, just about every federal department has EM jobs, they’re just fewer and farther between and more facility based than the larger EM ecosystem jobs that FEMA or ASPR have. Back in the day, USAID BHA was awesome (international humanitarian assistance and disaster response work) and had public health advisors, but obviously that no longer exists.
You can also pivot to EM not in the public health space – at the state or local level. Some county EMs have 1 person who does EM while also doing 3 other jobs, some counties or cities have at least staff of 40+. I have quite a few friends at FEMA and obviously they’re not having a great time right now but they previously LOVED their jobs.
As for investigations, I haven’t really seen that type of job – Theres no NTSB equivalent for EM. But, in the future you could look into the NTSB, CSB, CDC EIS or EPA for more investigative work that may touch on EM but isnt EM (but obviously those aren’t options now) – but you need to be very specialized for many of these jobs.
We do have AARs which look at lessons learned and areas fot improvement; I’d say this the closest we get to investigations IME. Some places have a whole person or team dedicated to this, others are wrapped into training and exercises.
In addition to the federal clusterf$)k thats going on, I want to stress that MOST stare and local EM jobs and many PH ones are funded by federal grants and thus the funding is insecure.
There are akso a ton of NGOs in the field – funding is going to be tricky there too, but might be a better option right now.
I LOVE my job and my field. I’m so interested in and passionate about the work. I love the mission. I love knowing I’m helping people who really need it. I’ve met some really, really close friends in this field. I go home and still think about work because I’m so interested in it.
But, it’s not easy. Crazy long hours, lots of stress, too many jerks who think this is the Navy SEALs, working with an often upset public, and local and state government pay is bad.
I’ll be able to post more later today so feel free to post any questions you might have!
I would love to hear more about your experience at the city level and anything else you can share when you have time! Length of day/hours would also be something I’d love to hear more about. How are the hours when it’s not “on”?
In my experience, in steady state it’s truly a M-F 9-5 (or 8-4, we can choose). Historically things have been quite flexible during blue skies, understanding that when it’s gray skies the job owns you.
We don’t have WFH, but we used to – mayor doesnt want any city employees WFH so we don’t have WFH.
We have on call, which for me is 1 week a month. On call is 24/7 for the week, but you can swap with someone if you have a conflict. For us on call means answering every single phone call (so I bring my phone into the bathroom while I shower) and being able to get to the office or elsewhere in the city within 1 hour. It makes me nervous to go for a run or to the grocery store while on call. Some weeks I get no calls, some weeks I get woken up at 3am with a call multiple nights.
Then when in response or early recovery, truly anything goes. Longest shift Ive ever worked was 21 hours (but was up for 36 hours), but I have worked with people who pulled 24 hour shifts for no-notice events. Longest stretch of days I went without a day off was 26 straight 12-16 hour shifts. We aim for 12 on/12 off and most things I deal with only last a few days. For protracted responses (COVID, for example) we aimed to do 13 days on, 1 day off. So, it was 13 straight 12-14 hour days, 1 day off. For months.
My job doesnt compensate us extra when we’re on call, but we can choose OT or comp (both at 1.5x) when we are approved to work more than 40 hours a week.
Also, IME response and initial recovery are very much “all hands on deck” meaning you’ll be doing plenty of work thats not in your wheelhouse because you’re a body they can throw at the problem. Sometimes I’m doing high level logistics planning despite not being a loggie. Sometimes I’m in charge of the whole operation and my boss’ boss is reporting to me. Sometimes I’m doing manual labor in the warehouse and loading trailers or setting up cots in a shelter. Sometimes I’m doing intern-level work spending an entire shift stapling packets. It’s expected that everyone chip in to get the job done.
I personally love this, but it’s not for everyone.
Also (OP here), I have a well-managed chronic condition that unfortunately excludes me from the public health commissioned corps. I did consider it in the past.
I do Environmental Social Governance, but when that wasn’t hiring I did Environment Health and Safety. I got some certifications to do disaster response from hazardous materials, and other worksite safety certifications. The investigations can be intense- the idea is to find the root cause of the problem. I was taught “six whys” – keep asking why at least six times to uncover that root cause. A thing I didn’t like about it was it really raised my anxiety- made me VERY aware of “near misses” where things did go wrong but no one was hurt, and lessons needed to be learned. Another thing I didn’t like was I felt like I was at my company and helping clients only in a checkmark capacity- no one really wanted to increase safety, or reduce risk. Honestly I didn’t do disaster response or recovery but a lot of the boring work was setting that up – writing plans and reviewing plans and updating plans – so that when something terrible happens – maybe not weather, a shooting, a chemical spill, anything – it goes smoother. Not sure if this helps.
I can’t emphasize the part about spending most days writing and reviewing plans enough (or policies, or FEMA regs, or ensuring compliance for all the grants).
Most of the job is a desk job and it’s not the most exciting stuff. Just lots and lots of meetings and writing and paperwork.
There are a lot of really fun, exciting days where I can’t believe I get paid to do this, but there are also a lot of super boring days.
OP here and I’m interested in near miss investigations – I did some in a health context and found it fascinating. Where did you get your certs?
OSHA or OSHA certified contractors delivered certification courses. When I started, the classes were in person; now many are asynchronous videos online.
Near-miss investigations for anything – I was on a public street construction site with dump trucks and overhead wires. If a spotter thought the dump truck, after dumping, still in dump-mode, was going to clip the overhead wires, and then the truck didn’t, that was an investigation. Were there signs about the overhead wires? Were they visible? Did the construction workers on the site tell the dump truck drivers? Was that audible? What system can be put in place to inform every dump truck every time about the overhead wires so that the wires aren’t clipped accidentally? How can that system be implemented? How does everyone get trained? How is it measured? Are there photos documenting every single part of this?
I’m not sure what else to say! It’s not rocket science but it’s a lot of thinking and paperwork and it is important and it literally saves time and money
Great question – I’ve also been thinking of getting to disaster response at some point. I think I would be very good at it, not to toot my own horn too much. Maybe more at the state/city level than federal.
Is disaster project management a role? That’s what I’d like to do.
Contractors are likely to have that project manager title, but they won’t be doing response.
IME, theres a lot of project management in the job but the title won’t be project manager. You’re more likely to be a program manager in your steady state job (where you’ll manage projects, among other things) and then also have disaster response and recovery duties.
We don’t do this in the US anymore. Move to canada
I’m yesterday’s panicked poster about what to wear in vail this week. Thanks for the support. Well, I’m en route and made some tweaks at the counsel of a friend in the same business who understands the oddity of the type of event I’m attending (fancy people and venue, but also men in jeans and blazers and only two women out of ~80….).
While I think I’m in a decent spot, I will have some free time. Land at 10 in Denver, get rental car and head to Vail. I don’t have any event until 6:30pm tonight. Is there an outdoor shopping area with somewhere between the airport and Vail? Hard to tell what I’m seeing when I search online. Jcrew, Nordstrom, DSW..? Not wanting to go in to a mall if I can help it – I don’t need to shop that badly. Ideally want a strappy sandal and/or another top.
Also, anything I can do with my spare time? Stops along that drive? Anything to check out in Vail? First time to the area!
Not sure why the aversion to malls as that is where these stores are mostly found? There’s a Nordstrom that doesn’t add TOO much time to the route, and a Brooks Brothers not far off the highway as you’re leaving town.
There aren’t a ton of places to shop on the way but there are oodles of shops in Vail Village. Vail Boot and Shoe is a good option and you’ll hit them right away on the walk in.
Vail Village itself is gorgeous. If you have time definitely walk/hike (it’s more of a walk than a hike) up to the Betty Ford Alpine Garden, it’s truly gorgeous. The farmer’s market will also be open on Saturday and is super fun. Enjoy! If this is the finance event I’m thinking of I’ve been my husband’s plus one a few times and it’s a wonderful time.
I would drive straight to Vail from DIA and spend your time walking around Vail Village. There are tons of shops and restaurants.
Agree but understand that the boutiques in VV are spendy. They may be outside your price range compared to JCrew or Nordstrom.
There’s a JCrew outlet right off the highway in Silverthorne (30 min from Vail) – not much else between airport and Vail unless you want to detour to Cherry Creek North – big outdoor area with shops and restaurants. A big Evereve, boutiques, chains. Fun store called Parker Thomas with reasonably priced on trend items where you might find a cute piece. I’d head to Vail and shop if I were you though!
I just can’t get over 2 women out of 80. My mind and career path simply can’t comprehend. Good luck!
Oh that’s super common in my industry too. It’s “better” now than 15 years ago when I started my career, but it’s still not super uncommon for me to be the only woman in a room of 30-50 at industry events. The most common ratio is about 3-5 women for 50-100 men.
OP – I think your ATV outing sounds SO FUN! I was massively jealous when I read that. My industry needs to up our outing offerings.
Why would you waste precious hours in one of the most beautiful places on earth shopping
Agreed. Go on a hike.
Recommend Cherry Creek Mall or the outlets that are in Frisco/Dillon as you go up to Vail. Most clothes shopping in Denver will be indoors bc it’s hot as blazes in summer and very wintry in Winter. Vail Village will have pricy silly stuff like Gorsuch (which is hilarious, but doubtful you are looking to spend $1000 for a cotton ruffly blouse).
Does anyone have a pied-a-terre in their local city? We live in a near suburb of Toronto, work downtown 2-3x a week, and with low(er) condo prices, we are considering whether our life would benefit from a crash pad. Our commute on public transit is about 1 hr door to door, and if we bought downtown, we’d choose something within 10 minutes walking of work, although “evening things to do” can be quite spread out.
What has me pausing is this – condo money buys a lot a lot of ubers at $50-60 a pop, and if you are going home in the later evening, it is usually 35-40 minutes in traffic. Rush hour is not an option. That said, there is something to be said for just getting to roll home into your bed and wake up the next morning. The vision would be use 1x/week consistently, with random days or periods for sporting events, TIFF, theatre, hosting my parents from out of country, etc. I’d guess maybe 6 times a month?
Has anyone been faced with a similar choice and decided to go with the condo? Or not? In terms of finances, we’d not view it as an investment, but we aren’t so wealthy that money isn’t a consideration. We would not be able to AirBnB it, but we could put it on homeswap places.
My parents did this and got rid of the condo within five years. The assessments were so expensive and they rarely cared about the “improvements” because they didn’t live in the building full time. If you’ve never owned a second home make sure you crunch all the numbers. Do you need a second house cleaner, cable/internet package, security system, etc? Will you have to buy a parking spot (if one is even available)? Do you get annoyed with frequent packing and living out of a suitcase? Leaving a few outfits at your second home works for a casual summer house but it’s trickier with a work wardrobe.
We keep two houses, one about 1.5 hours from the city and an apartment in the city where we both work. We spend weekends outside the city and have the convenience during the week, Love it and highly recommend.
There’s no way I’d consider that just for an hour commute.
How about just getting hotel rooms for nights when you have big events you are going to in the evening? I have to imagine that’s cheaper than a condo, and you don’t have to deal with the upkeep costs and costs to furnish a second home.
A friend of mine works in city that is about 3 hours from her current location. She ended up cutting a deal with a local hotel for 2 nights a week (she has a hybrid schedule). Hotel was thrilled to have consistent business on a Tuesday and Wednesday night, and when she priced it out it was cheaper than the condo for a few years. Less convenient in terms of leaving your stuff there, but it’s worth looking into.
I agree the hotel when we want it seems like a good compromise, although in pricing it out, I’ve realized that some of the nights we want it are extremely expensive hotel nights – e.g. TIFF rates, NYE, sporting events, etc. I mean, it is obvious that the nights we would want to use it are popular for a reason.
Costs for furnishing aren’t a significant factor for us considering the size of the space and my love of thrifting and FB marketplace. Condo fees are no joke though.
That still has got to be cheaper than a second home.
On peak nights good hotels in TO are 1k+
Even at $1k+ a few nights a week, that’s still cheaper than a condo and HOA fees
I do the less expensive version of this and rent a room near work w roommates. I don’t love it, but it’s better than the hour long commute to my marital home. I’m also emergency personnel so have to work in-person during weather events, which was the deciding factor for me.
We just bought a primary residence downtown, historic row home, which is a freehold so no condo fees.
I would appproach an air bnb operator about a lower rate for a standing offer.
We do this for a place near DH’s mom’s house. We went through Airbnb the first 3 visits and now book direct with the owner for half the rate.
Not personally, but know people that have. Person 1 never sold their original near-downtown condo, is an accountant and uses it primarily for really busy periods of work where it would be stay there all week, go home on the weekend. Person 2 ended up buying the condo later in life (while owning a second home), then realized that as others have mentioned that two or three nights per week at a hotel, is much cheaper than a condo and meant flexibility on getting hotels close to the evening night out. But, with all of that said, I would probably pay for the condo just to have a place to have my parents not in my house.
We have done it in a down market in an area where condo prices have tended to appreciate over time. We used it for work days in the City and weekend cultural events. We now have it rented out and it’s more than paying for itself and appreciating. We may go back to it full time if our suburban place gets to be too much for us to deal with, there is great medical care nearby.
I’m going to San Francisco for a long weekend in August. I’ve been before, but 15+ years ago, and I was a kid then. Any recommendations or must-dos?
I like: Vintage shopping, running and hiking, vegan food. Not planning to rent a car but comfortable with public transportation.
If you have a trail app, that can help you pick running or hiking routes through state and federal parks.
A few suggestions: hiking in the Presidio, running along Marina Green and Crissy Field, vegan food at Wildseed. There are often food trucks at the parade ground in the Presidio so you could combine a hike with vegan food there. And don’t forget Golden Gate Park for walking/hiking.
You might also enjoy the Ferry Building for shopping and casual eating, though it gets really crowded on Saturday afternoons. There is a small independent bookstore and a crafts and gift shop, though nothing vintage. You can also get a Clipper Card for public transit at the Ferry Building. Unfortunately, we don’t yet have a way to pay by phone or credit card directly on busses and at Bart/Muni stations. (if you don’t go to the ferry building, you can buy a Clipper card at BART/Muni stations..)
Muni does have a day pass phone option, actually. Definitely download the waymo app– Iprefer waymos to Ubers, generally. I feel super-safe in them.
I live in the Presidio (it’s heaven) and cosign that a run along Crissy and Marina Green, or, if you are into hillier, the Land’s End trail, would be a great hike.
For vegetarian, there’s Greens, Burma Superstar and a lot of other restaurants–just check yelp or Eater or SFgate.com lists.
We also have some really good bakeries (not vegan–they have butter) but check out Arsicault (get there early) and B Patisserie for great croissants and fancy pastries.
Valencia Street and Clement Street both have a couple of cute vintage clothing shops. If you’re into vintage furniture, look at the design district.
Green’s is a vegetarian restaurant with plenty of vegan options and a beautiful view of the water. The food is phenomenal. The restaurant has a storied history along with Chez Panisse as one of the mothers of California cuisine, especially vegetarian California cuisine.
I’ve always reserved as early as possible for special meals on popular days. Not sure if reservations are always necessary, but they’re definitely a good idea.
Anyone have success stories of cleaning red wine off of nubuck? Surprise turbulence and tan nubuck Sperrys had an encounter last night…. it’s a few splatters, not a huge saturated mess, but googling turns up everything from “it’s doomed” to “click here to shop my recommended kit” so thought I’d try the hive!
I would take it to a professional
You can get products specifically for removing red stains. I used to have one I got from a janitorial supply company. It got vomited fruit punch out of a dining room chair (kid years). Red wine seems easier. Looking at Amazon, I think it might have been Red Away.
Nature’s Miracle always works for me on any kind of stain.
Any honest takes on Quince? Is it Loft-like quality? Fast fashion basically? I have a need to refresh my wardrobe and it can’t all be $$ pieces at the moment. I like the styles more at Quince than some other lower price point stores I’ve poked around at but never bought there before.
Yes I would say the quality is similar to Loft. I got a cashmere short sleeve sweater from Quince that lasted a couple years before it got a hole in it. I bought some other heavyweight sweaters that have held up well, and linen pants that are good quality.
I haven’t had good experiences. I’m often taken with their promise and aesthetic only to be disappointed. I found the quality lacking and I’m not traditionally a stickler for quality. So it’s not poor fabric or durability so much as “this can’t be meant to fit this way” kind of issues.
I agree with the fit issues based on one dress I bought in 2 sizes, both of which looked terrible. I did buy the organic fisherman sweater for 2 of my adult daughters, and they like them and have been holding up well.
The fit is awful, as it is with many of the internet brands (e.g., Everlane).
I wouldn’t characterize Everlane as an internet brand. Also the fit works for me.
It is definitely an internet brand. It’s only got a handful of stores in major cities, and for a long time it had no stores at all.
I would say similar quality. I’ve been pretty happy with everything I’ve gotten from Quince.
I was in Loft yesterday and I was surprised at how much good stuff is on their sale rack, with an extra 50% off. Unfortunately I don’t need much but I did buy a tailored-ish cardigan for a zoom interview.
It’s hit and miss. I’ve had some wins from Quince and some stuff I’m meh on. It’s worth a shot though.
I’ve had durability and odd fit issues. The cashmere sweater was disposable for me. It didn’t last one season. I like the silk blouses solely to wear under sweaters, over an undershirt. The linen blazers wrinkle excessively, even for cheap linen.
This is my experience, too. I have some silk tops that are workhorses – the dolman-sleeve ones – and some that were so off that I returned them. I had an amazing pair of linen pants that I wore out after two years of constant summer wear, but the replacements I ordered are terrible, and would maybe fit better if I wore them backwards. I think they probably stack the fabric a lot when cutting patterns, and that leads to size and fit issues.
The quality is fine. The fabrics are nicer than Loft, the construction may be similar.
https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/reviews/my-month-testing-quince-products/
I have a couple of their silk shirts, and I don’t plan to buy their silk again. It’s just too thin and wrinkly. I had a couple of cashmere sweaters that were ok but were felled by moths – not Quince’s fault there. I bought and returned a couple of t-shirts; I didn’t like them as much as Gap or Uniqlo Ts that are the same price. I also don’t find a lot of their colors appealing – they’re just not quite right.
Agree with you on everything.
The silk: It feels nice, but I’ve had a hard time getting wrinkles out, and it always looks slightly rumpled, which is not the vibe I’m going for at work.
The linen tanks are nice, fabric wise, but the cut isn’t quite right.
The ponte pants slide down my legs after awhile.
The colors don’t really work for me. If you like dark, warm colors, you will have a much better time with Quince.
It’s a huge bummer because I like the styles, but the pieces I’ve bought are just a bit off.
Horrible quality clothes. Something is always off. They don’t wear well. And they sure as heck aren’t the items they’re knocking off. For every two things you’d consider buying there, just get one of the real thing.
Garbage quality, not worth it all. The few things I’ve tried from Quince got worn once or twice before they started looking crappy.
Save your money. I’ve bought items, all low quality. The best was a $50 knock off of Anthropologie’s Colette jeans. Buy on sale from J. Crew or even H&M is much better quality.
I really like the silk midi shirt dress I have from them. Lots of compliments. I also have a 3 pack of sleeveless tanks and like the material/fit for casual summer outfits. I’ve returned the jeans and sweaters I tried though. Weird fit issues.
Take a look at Everyone. I think their quality is better than quince, and the products are all reasonably-priced. I have a belted black jumpsuit that’s been my go-to for “what the heck do I wear to this?” occasions for years. Also, their Essential Cotton tees and tanks are great– substantial fabric weight, and they fit me well.
Not Everyone! EVERLANE. (stupid autocorrect!)
I like Quince a lot. The gold earrings and necklaces I’ve gotten have held up nicely, as have the linen wrap/scarf, leather bags and dresses. Haven’t bought any of their sweaters or pants.
I agree it’s hit-or-miss, on fit. I am wearing the silk midi slip skirt today and I really like it. IME, it does not wrinkle that easily, and it’s one thing that I rarely iron or steam because hanging it on the rod when I take a shower steams out a lot of the wrinkles. The silk camp shirt type blouse is nice if a bit boxy, but the silk dress (a wrap, IIRC) had a strange fit and went back. I also really like the silk-cashmere blend v-necks, didn’t notice significant pilling after one season. My SO has a cashmere half-zip that he loves; it’s pilled a bit but he’s had it a good five or six years.
Turning 55 soon. I’m up not a lot of pounds but 2 clothes sizes since my exercise routine vanished around COVID and I’ve had chronic sinus infections and surgeries (you can’t exercise if you can’t breathe; predating COVID times and unrelated). I’d love to have a closet full of clothes that fit, but I have a closet full of clothes, half of which are compromise choices when I’ve had a work trip or meeting and nothing fit.
1. Any odds of losing the weight/size if I can make a dedicated attempt to get back in motion (more for my physical health and sanity at this point than vanity)?
2. Any words of encouragement on just ripping off the bandaid and purging the closet anyway and having the reward of shopping for things that I love (looking at you, Me+Em) regardless of how #1 turns out?
Your life is now. You deserve nice well fitting clothes in this body and in this season of life.
You deserve a decluttered closet that works for you now; not a storage space for the person you were six years and six pounds ago.
You will lose the weight. You won’t want most of the clothes from so long ago. It’s ok to purge. Someone wants those clothes, donating is ok
5 years is a long time; purge the clothes and then if/when you change size again you can get more clothes.
5 years isn’t a long time for clothes.
Maybe if you are 22. Or you are buying fast fashion.
I’m with you. Some cuts and styles age, but many do not.
5 years post covid is a long time!! The world is so so different.
Absolutely without hesitation purge now. Even if that stuff fit it wouldn’t look right. Dress the person you are now.
1. Getting in motion will absolutely change your body; you’ll get fitter, you’ll feel better, etc.
2. You deserve to dress will and in things that make you feel great right now. Purge (it’ll feel great!) and get a few things that you love.
This is all an investment in yourself, which is worth it!
Agree with the you will lose the weight and you won’t want the clothes.
I was able to really jump start my weight loss with just a calorie tracker and doing the 1000 or something step walking videos on YouTube. Set it for 1/2 a pound of loss per week. It won’t be fast weight loss, but it is less overwhelming than thinking oh I have to go back to the gym.
As someone who has lost 100 pounds in 2 years—-both. Get a wardrobe that works for you now, that makes you feel good now. And do your best to get healthier for yourself. If that means GLP-1 then do it. Whatever, even if it’s incremental, it all adds up
Came here to say–a GLP-1 is what you need at this stage in life. Your body’s hormones are fighting you, but a GLP-1 will reset a lot of things and help you get back on track. HIghly recommend. It’s not a failure, it’s not cheating, it’s resetting you back to the metabolism you had before. Talk to a doctor and see if you’re a candidate.
Agree with everyone who says you can lose the weight but get rid of the clothes unless it is an item you absolutely love with every fiber of your being.
But also adding that at 58 I have accepted that while I might weight what I weighed in my 30s, my shape is never going back (at last not without surgery and/or a more stringent exercise program than I have the time or inclination for). It is probably not terribly noticeable but it does change slightly the way I dress and the body parts I want to hide or highlight.
Dreadful quality and weird fit. If you want silk, the Antonio Melani at Dillards pieces are much better quality. I like Saks sale cashmere much more than Quince.
I don’t think 5 years is too long to keep clothes. I (selectively) wear clothes I bought 20 years ago and enjoy it/look put together. So keep them if you want, but I echo the folks saying your life is now. Make sure you have enough that is comfortable and feels great as you are. You definitely deserve that.
What are the different modalities of therapy? I’ve done talk therapy in the past, and it’s felt kind of pointless and meandering. I’m a pragmatic, action-oriented person and I haven’t found therapists helpful in the past for working through certain situations. E.g., I had PTSD from a natural disaster and the therapist wanted to work through my anger by discussing my mom. Yeah, I’m sure my upbringing has an effect on how I express anger, but the more immediate issue was that I needed concrete coping skills to deal with day-to-day anger and fear about the disaster. Right now, I’m dealing with grief from job loss and being the family breadwinner, and extremely high anxiety about finding a new job. I’m not sure if I should look for a certain type of therapist or approach. (I’m already on meds for anxiety.)
I can only speak to PTSD, but you *need* a qualified and specialized trauma therapist for PTSD treatment. It is like going to the doctor – you would not see a GP for a rare liver disorder. You need a specialist. And you need the right specialist; you don’t want an ophthalmologist doing your hysterectomy.
Two common modalities for PTSD treatment are prolonged exposure therapy and EMDR, which is basically prolonged exposure therapy plus some fancy eye stuff.
To find a qualified trauma therapist, I recommend looking at the hospitals that treat GSW patients in your area (typically the level 1 trauma centers). They often have an affiliated traumatic stress center. Those centers are where they refer their crime vics, and they just do trauma, all day every day. If they have a waitlist, they also probably maintain a list of other trauma therapists in the area you can try contacting.
I would second all of this. I have PTSD also and talk therapy wasn’t so helpful for me. I ended up lucking into a DBT therapist who did prolonged exposure therapy. I did that protocol with her, and it changed my life. Like a full 180. I cannot recommend it highly enough. It’s terrible during the therapy, so you need to make sure you have a support plan (my therapist and I spent a whole session on this), but by the end, it had honestly changed how my brain works.
Same, and thank you for mentioning how intense PET is. It works well and it works fast, but it has a very high dropout rate, and my therapist told me I could not drink or take painkillers during it because it is very common for people to turn to substances as they go through it. Absolutely changed my brain, too, and I would recommend it to anyone dealing with PTSD. It is hard, but PTSD is harder.
When you interview therapists you can ask them about their approach. Some therapists focus on providing practical day-to-day coping skills to deal with current stressors. Others focus on figuring out and resolving the underlying issues that may be causing current unhappiness. A person might benefit from both approaches at different times in their life.
CBD Cognitive Behavioral something has a lot of data behind it. It is very much about recognizing your emotions and responses and deals with anxiety and depressive thoughts and re-thinking your emotions. I highly recommend it but as always talk with your doctors and providers
My daughter had good results with EMDR therapy for PTSD. It’s evidence-based and doesn’t take forever.
Look into EMDR
I knew how court houses work, how police work, how taxes work, how deeds are registered, land records and foreclosures, how trials work, getting divorced, child support, the concept of jurisdiction (I live where a state borders another state and all state law things are done by counties which don’t line up with post office addresses for a location), and all that. I had done mock trial since high school. Somehow, I still did not understand what law school would be like (so many peppercorns; also, I was not told that there would be foxes). I stuck it out though.
You don’t know what you don’t know.
I generally agree with this take, but what does this have to do with anything?
What do peppercorns and foxes mean?
What the heck is a peppercorn in this context? Foxes I can guess at. And what’s the point of this post?
Huh?
+1
There is nothing about this that I understand lolol
Hahah, are you taking Property Law as a 1L? This is apropos of yesterday’s conversation about certain professions that are difficult to succeed in if you don’t have a parent or role model in that profession. Because sometimes, you don’t know what you don’t know!
I don’t mean this to be harsh: if you are in law school, please learn to write and to have a point to what you are communicating.
+1. This also applies even if you’re not in law school.
What
I think there are some people out there with big chips on their shoulders who think other people got some manual of secrets about the world that they didn’t and I think it’s just not true. Almost everybody is learning as they go through life.
+1
I went to poor inner city schools and knew no attorneys growing up. When I started thinking about going to law school, I read so many books about what to think about when choosing a school, succeeding in law school, what different legal fields were like, how to get into biglaw, and so much more similar stuff. If these books existed 20 years ago, I have to believe the resources are also available now. It’s up to you to look for them and learn this info.
I agree. It’s the norm not to know what law school is like before attending. We can’t know everything ahead of time. It’s not a video game, it’s life and it’s part of living.
I was a little confused by yesterday’s post. If you’re pursuing a medical career, I truly do not know how you could be surprised to find out that you need a whole lot of help to raise two children while being in med school. Are you not listening and absorbing the conversations around you while you’re going through all this schooling? That’s not on your family or upbringing to solve. The OP’s cousin was extraordinarily lucky that her life plan worked out in spite of it all.
I get all of this except for peppercorns and foxes.
Are peppercorns preppy people? Are foxes sly people out to cut you or take you down? Is this just a reference to your own school or friend group’s slang or inside joke?
The fox is a reference to 1L a property law trope. Peppercorns I have no idea.
I’m pretty sure it’s a reference to a “mere peppercorn” being enough consideration for a contract. I remember this only because my husband overheard my BARBRI lectures and thought it was a hilarious phrase, and ever since then has referred to our (not very bright) chihuahua as having a brain the size of a mere peppercorn.
Peppercorn is from 1L contract law – consideration could be nominal, a mere peppercorn.
I think I get it, OP, and I agree. Fortunately it turned out, just by chance, that I was great at peppercorns and foxes. Who knew? (Not that that helped me much after law school, but it did get me a nice resume to start out with.)
You could always just take the anxiety meds
Anyone have any suggestions on how to become a better listener? Books, podcasts, tricks….anything. I am such a yapper and it has become worse working from home since I don’t talk to people all day like I did in the office. I really just wish I would shut up sometimes so while I want to work on that I think the angle is to listen better.
I just finished How to Know A Person by David Brooks, and it is exactly about this. Really liked it.
It’s easier than you think. The most simple: stop talking. The more thoughtful–am I actually contributing anything when I speak? Then stop talking.
WAIT – Why Am I Talking?
Take a beat and consider if you are adding to the conversation or not.
There’s no real trick. You just practice.
I would suggest mindfulness. It might help you stay in the moment listening instead of thinking ahead to what you want to say.
I’ve been told I’m a good listener. My approach is pretty simple. First, I ask open ended (not yes/no) questions that I genuinely want to know the answer to. Give them space to respond, and don’t rush to fill in the answer you think they’ll say. Get comfortable with little pauses and brief silences, which they are probably using to form a thoughtful reply. Then ask a follow-up question to go a little deeper. Try to limit inserting your opinions or experiences, like “that must have been or felt like XYZ”. Instead focus on finding out how they felt or what they thought about XYZ. But bottom line, I think it starts with being curious about people and wanting to know more about them.
You bring up a secondary issue, that is also important to address.
It is very difficult for some of us who are now home alone all the time to get enough of the socializing (including talking) that we need. Can you get a few more social outlets into your life? Taking a coffee break / lunch break to meet a friend for a walk and talk more often? More early evening activities for an hour to get more socializing in? A new volunteering activity? Maybe something where you are talking/teaching?
I never used to be a bad listener. But after not saying a word for a day or two to anyone, I tend more towards verbal diarrhea when I finally let lose.
hmmm any chance you’re on either the ADHD or autism spectrum?
I really do not think so, I am just an extrovert.
Who here has ordered from Me + Em and can comment on how items fit / run or any issues ordering from abroad?
I’m 5-4 but mostly leg, so my torso is short even for an average-sized person. And I’m a pear, so proportions are just tricky. I often order petite jackets and dresses so that the waist hits me at my actual waist vs my hips. It’s not always needed though (vs places like & Other Stories, where I’ve given up and just order for my kid who is 5-8).
I have. Love them. No issues. I’m a different size than you, but I found the measurements provided for each item were very accurate.
I need a bit of a workwear refresh and think that fall would be the perfect time to do it since that is when places like Talbots have suiting and other places have traditional workwear. I feel like my 2023 suiting is a bit snug, but if I get a 2025 suit, I need some other pieces to relax it that don’t veer too casual but are good for a serious workplace where I meet clients regularly. Does that make sense? Relaxing also means something that isn’t “but just wear it with sparking white sneakers”, more like adding in a blouse in a fun pattern or with interesting embroidery. Would The Fold be good for this or Me + Em (since we’re featuring them)? IDK where to start — Talbots will have some staples but 100% Talbots won’t be what I need (they and BR have petite suiting jackets, which I do feel that I still need, along with pants that fit; I like wool for suiting material).
I don’t think they have wool, at least not right now, but Aritzia has suits in petites. They’ll also fit the more “relaxed” note that you’re looking for.
For the interesting tee part, Boden might have some options once you have found your basic suiting.
Long shot question for the hive: Does anyone know of a drugstore dupe for Verb Glossy Shine Spray? Top ingredients are water, trisoloxane coconut alkanes, C14-22 alcohols, and phenyl trimethicone. I like the creamy but thin consistency and lack of tackiness/residue feeling in my hair.
Nope, and if a little goes a long way, it might be worth splurging on the real thing. FWIW, Verb seems to work really well with my hair type and texture.
Not directly helpful, but check the Verb website around any holiday – they always have sales, usually 20% off, and sometimes have jumbo sizes of products at better prices. They seem to be slow about shipping, though.
I am replacing my guest bathroom in September. Work scheduled, materials purchased, deposit placed.
I also need to replace the carpet in the master bedroom, which is the next door down and shares a wall with that bath. The carpet is so gross that I have been living and sleeping in a different bedroom since I moved in 2 months ago. I finally chose a carpet. Installation can happen mid-August.
Would you wait to install this new carpet until AFTER the guest bath is redone? There is a forced air system serving both spaces. I want to avoid lots of new dust getting into newly installed carpet. But also I’m impatient to start using the master bedroom:(
I’d wait.
Wait. There will be dust tracked everywhere, and you won’t want that in your brand-new carpet.
Yes, wait. Any construction is going to be dusty and defeat the purpose of something brand new.
No. There will not be much uncontainable dust from a bathroom. Some drywall sanding, sure; some demo dust; but they’re not sanding thousands of square feet of wood floor. Put plastic over the bedroom door on the demo and drywall days and enjoy your new carpet.
I agree because it’s not in the same room. In addition, if there are any construction delays, you will have to wait longer to start enjoying your bedroom.
You could split the difference by removing the old carpet now, and waiting to put the new carpet in until the reno is done. This might be a terrible idea depending on what is under your carpet, but I am here to offer creative solutions.
Wait. Bathroom remodeling involves dry wall dust, lots of dust from the attic, tile dust, possibly stone dust and some stinky adhesives.
I procrastinate a lot. Too much, really. I know that it is rooted in perfectionism and fear of failure. Even with that knowledge, I have had a hard time fixing it. I never miss deadlines or anything, but I make things much harder on myself than they need to be. Is there some kind of coaching that can help with this problem? I realize therapy is an option, but I already understand how I got here.
Four Thousand Weeks by Oliver Burkeman discusses this and how to deal with it.
All of his books are great for this.
Thanks! I’ll have to check this out.
Set tighter deadlines at work and make more weekend plans (if it’s work procrastination). Works like a charm.
No advice, but commiseration. I’m told that medication could fix this, but my doctor won’t prescribe it for me.
I’ve been on Adderall, Vyvanse, Ritalin and Concerta. Medication does not fix it, unfortunately.
Medication can help, but it’s not a magic bullet by any means.
Talk to a psychiatrist and learn more about whether it’s appropriate or not
You could try some of the techniques I’ve been told in therapy:
– Don’t “work” on anything for more than 30-45 minutes. If you’re procrastinating at that time, change tasks and come back.
– When you leave at the end of the day write down detailed to-dos for the next day. It’s easier to get started when its obvious.
– Think about when you have energy for different types of tasks. Right after lunch is not the time to start a new project probably, but might be fine for catching up on emails.
– I’ve been setting a lot of timers and saying I’ll get done as much as I can within 15 minutes. It helps a lot.
A lot of these are basically ADHD strategies.
I used to really beat myself up about procrastinating. Then, some years ago, I just decided to accept that I was a last-minute person and stop beating myself up. I still waited until the last minute but at least I got to skip the part where I punished myself for it.
Any tips for getting scratches out of LVP? We rent, so replacing is not an option right now.
I know this abbreviation has something to do with floors but I can’t read it as anything other than Lisa Vanderpump. lol
I read louis vuitton purse.
I wish people would just spell out what they mean.
Lvp is the standard industry term; almost no one actually writes out luxury vinyl planks, to the point that I had to google to determine what the term stood for!
It’s a very common abbreviation.
This is not a thing. If there are any spare boards, the scratched ones could potentially be replaced and the rest reinstalled, but that’s a process. If the scratches are not too bad, maybe they can be touched up with some creative markers and/or crayons. (For wood floors I have camouflaged dings nicely with wax crayons and an iron, but I wouldn’t apply much heat to LVP).
The crayons do not work for LVP or engineered wood (at least the cheap engineered wood we have in our house). My experience is that they only work on hardwood.
Take a picture and head to a local hardware store (the mom-and-pop-type places, not Home Depot or Lowe’s — think Ace Hardware or Do it Best). They can give you some ideas. There’s something I’ve used on floors called Rejuvenate that might help with making the damage appear much more minor.
We just spontaneously booked a trip to Auckland in late Nov/early Dec! It will be me, my husband, and our son will be around 20 months old. Yes I know it’s a long flight with a toddler and we are in for it, but it was a great deal and it’s somewhere we’ve always wanted to go.
Anyway, would love any itinerary tips! We will be there for 14 days, excluding travel days.
Depends what you like to do! Will you rent a car? Do you plan to go to South Island as well or stay on North Island?
Personally, Auckland was my least favorite part of NZ. I loved the more rural areas. Rotorua is not too far from Auckland and really has a lot to see and do.
But my favorite places were on South Island (Kaikoura).
I was there 15 years ago with my then-6 year old so I can’t recommend specific restaurants or anything. We loved the Aukland Museum (there was an earthquake simulation room that is very lifelike), and while we were in Aukland took a boat to Tiritiri Matangi – one of the conservation islands where they have eliminated predators and allow native birds to flourish (there are some by Wellington as well). On the other side of the North Island (an hour or so from Aukland), the beaches in Piha are beautiful black sand. The National Aquarium in Napier is a great small aquarium and Napier has an interesting history and beautiful buildings. Lake Taupo has beautiful falls around it, and we enjoyed hiking at Mount Ngauruhoe, which has a beautiful barren landscape because of relatively recent volcanic activity (it was Mt Doom in the LOTR trilogy!) We are also big geeks. In the Wellington area, Te Papa is one of the best museums I have ever been to. Hands down. We found playgrounds everywhere, and the people we met are warm and friendly. All that said, if you can take a local flight to the South Island, I hear it is beautiful and plan on going back for that.
Agree that Te Papa is one of the best museums, and I’ve been to lots and lots of museums.
I loved spending time in Wellington. It was by far my favorite city. I also loved spending time on Waiheke. I took the ferry from Wellington and then rented a car and drove. It was really easy. People will tell you it’s long (and it is if you’re not used to 2-lane roads). I am so driving 50 miles one way is normal to me.
I drove from Blenheim to Christchurch. I might have stayed another day along the way, but stopped for seals and walks on the beach and eating seafood. Christchurch is a nice smaller town but I don’t think it’s a must visit. I spent 2 nights around Mt. Cook — gorgeous scenery. Because of a road closure, I ended up driving over to Oamaru and visiting some small shops on the way to Queenstown. Personally, I thought Queenstown was overrated. Too touristy. I only went there to see Milford Sound but probably could have missed it entirely. You will need to stick to one island or the other primarily unless you’re flying in between but I think driving is the best way to see the country.
I’d probably stick to the North Island. I’ve been to the South Island, but the farthest corners (Queenstown, glaciers, the sounds) were the best parts (sorry Christchurch!), and that’s too much driving for 2 weeks.
Random things to consider
Rotorua – the wonderful museum is still closed but it’s still a cool town, has nice hot spring spas, and is on the way for a lot of other destinations, around there are different geothermal parks
Bay of plenty, Coromandel – sandy beaches and relaxation. There was also a wonderful firefly dusk paddling tour we did from there
Lake Taupo, Huka falls, nice for boating, fishing and hiking
Wellington, Te Papa museum like others said, also Zealandia
Napier wasn’t my thing – but probably it was the weather
Matamata, great if you like Hobbit stuff a lot, probably not worth it otherwise
Tongariro, very cool volcanic landscape, I wouldn’t do the famous day hike with a toddler but there are very cool shorter ones
Waitangi treaty grounds – learn about the history of Maoris and settlers . There is also some good paddling up there, as well as Kauri forests.
Auckland gets a bad rep but it’s a great base to explore the surroundings. Tiritiri Maitangi and Waiheke were already mentioned. Puhoi tea room has a spot in my heart. Waitekere ranges have some awesome bushwalks, Orewa has some nice beaches, and I always enjoy the Auckland art museum.
and one more detail that I wish Napa Valley would learn from: they are super well set up (with affordable shuttles, bus lines etc) for you to stop at their many wineries and not to have to get behind the wheel or have a designated driver in your party.
Yes!!
I just spent 2 weeks in NZ earlier this year. It’s wonderful and you’ll love it. A lot of what we did is probably too ambitious for a toddler, but some tips: The South Island is gorgeous, and highly recommend going if you can. Internal flights on Air New Zealand are relatively cheap and easy (we flew from Rotorua to Christchurch and the Rotorua airport doesn’t even have security. Then back from Dunedin to Auckland-Dunedin was a slightly larger airport with security, but not by much). My favorite thing was swimming with dolphins in Kaikoura–again, too challenging for a toddler but you could definitely take a dolphin watching cruise instead of swimming with them. Milford Sound is beautiful, but a toddler would be bored and you can skip it. The glow worm caves, on the other hand, might be entertaining for them (we went to the ones in Te Anu, but there are some in the North Island as well). Hobbiton is magical. We went to Hobbiton the day we arrived–didn’t want to drive on arrival day, so we used Ready2Roll-they picked us up at the Auckland airport, took us to Hobbiton (and arranged tickets) and dropped us off in Rotorua. I’d recommend them.
We did drive ourselves for the most part. The initial “oh my god I’m driving on the wrong side of the road” feeling (if you’re from the US not the UK) is slightly terrifying but you’ll get over it pretty quickly. The roads aren’t busy and it’s not bad. Just every time you turn, repeat to yourself, “left side!”
My favorite stop on my NZ trip was Waiheke Island, which is a short ferry ride from a terminal in Auckland. You can hike/walk around the island and go to wineries. Some of the wineries also had great food.
I also really liked the hot water beach on the Coramandel peninsula. You can hike to Cathedral Cove and then visit the hot water beach nearby whenever the tide is right. That may be good for a toddler – just be careful that you don’t dig anywhere that is truly hot.
I think the main draw of NZ is the hiking and wine, so definitely bring a hiking carrier if that’s your thing. A lot of the hot spots like Rotorua weren’t very exciting, but they’re still something to do.
I am paying $50 / month for dental insurance. A dental cleaning out of pocket is $150, and I typically get 2 a year. I still have a copay of $75. Do I really need dental insurance?
Okay no I misread. My deductible is $75. After that everything is covered.
Still, I’m paying $675 per year (($50 per month X 12 months) + $75 deductible) for $300 worth of work.
that doesn’t sound like great coverage, but what’s covered other than basic cleanings? like if you have a cavity, or need a root canal, etc. that could be a lot more out of pocket.
Check the annual policy limits and see if it is worth it. When I worked for the federal government for a year, they offered $5,000 as the maximum benefit for a $500 premium. I didn’t buy insurance that year and just paid out of pocket for cleanings. Whether you can bear a major unexpected payment of several thousand dollars bears on the answer to this question for you.
This can only be answered if you ever get cavities or need major dental work (root canals, implants, etc.).
I am in my mid-40s and have had one cavity. I have super-hard teeth, genetic.
I do have dental insurance because it’s free at my current tech company, but when I had to pay around what you’re paying, I used to not get dental insurance, and get a cleaning a year. I also would start with insurance, get x-rays (paid by insurance) and then…not get x-rays for a few years.
Hope this helps.
I’ve waived dental off and on for years because my dentist always billed the excess over insurance anyway, so I was paying more than necessary. The only years I’ve ever felt like I came out/would have come out ahead with dental is when I’ve been due for a panoramic x-ray or one year when I chipped a tooth and had a small repair. I will say that I’m lucky to have very good teeth, and so I’ve only had a handful of fillings at this point. The most recent filling was probably 10+ years ago. My hygienist knows I usually pay OOP, so she will ask me if I want to see the dentist each visit or just every other time.