Suit of the Week: Antonio Melani

151 Comments

1. Trying again because my post on the morning thread was tied up for 3 hours(!?!)

   Help me decide where to stay in Montreal?

   Going for a long weekend in February and overwhelmed with the number of AirBnb options — what neighborhood downtown would you ladies recommend for first-time visitors looking for good restaurants and ease of walking/subway access to tourist stuff, but that isn’t unbeknownst-to-us in the middle of the business district and deserted at night?

   (Not super interested in trendy “nightlife” i.e. bars/clubs — I’m looking for the Philly equivalent of Rittenhouse/Wash Square as opposed to, say, Old City or Northern Libs or – god forbid – Convention Center district)

   1. The Plateau

      1. +1 – that’s the fun trendy area with the good restaurants and independent shops and that kind of thing.

   2. This was several years ago, but I loved Le Crystal. It was very affordable and had a hot tub on the roof with a beautiful view of the city!

   3. I would stay in the Plateau as well. I wouldn’t stay too far east though, I would stick near St Laurent blvd. Just for ease of walking to shops and restaurants.

   4. Thanks all! We just booked a place about halfway between the park and St Laurent, and also a short walk (10 mins I think) to either the Mont royal or Sherbrooke stations. Specific restaurant recs are very welcome if anyone is still reading :)

      1. Sounds ideal! I don’t get out a whole lot but I love Kaza Maza and Rumi. Lots of other places on Duluth – many byob. Wine is purchased at the SAQ, or some cheap brands at depanneurs until 11pm only. You should get bagels from St.Viateur or Fairmount, smoked meat at Schwartz’s (or the Main across the street, also yummy and no line up). Please eat at Garde Manger (and/or Joe Beef/ Liverpool house) because I think it’s out of my budget but looks amazing. I like the tearoom Sparrow (I had chai and eccles cake and was in heaven). Lawrence for dinner and/or drinks or brunch. For a cheap and delicious adventure: Bombay Mahal on Jean Talon. Best coffees I’ve had are Pikolo, Myriade, Humble Lion, café Nevé. But do stop for a latté and a sandwich at the (Italian) social club on St Viateur. Great people watching. Oh, you must try poutine: I recommend Lafleur’s (our yummiest fast food chain) for the best fries in the entire world, or La Banquise if you want to get all fancy about your poutine and have a waiter bring it to you :) Bring your warmest clothes and waterproof boots and you’ll have fun!

         1. thank you!

2. Any recommendations on a good multivitamin? I understand that many believe that you don’t need to take one, but I do feel better when I take one and want to continue doing so. I have been buying the GNC women’s multi for years but open to other suggestions.

   1. I love the Olly vitamins, after years of failing to take vitamins consistently, gummies are apparently the solution

      1. I get the Costco gummies!!!

   2. I am currently taking a prenatal since I was pregnant and am now BFing and am going to continue to take it when I stop because my nails (which are usually horribly thin and weak) are the greatest they have ever been.

   3. I sorta believe vitamins are all a bunch of hooey, but the *only* thing that has kept my Vitamin D levels from being deficient in my annual physical is a daily vitamin. My doctor says the best one is the one you will actually take and for me that is VitaFusion MultiVites… it is a treat to eat them, so I do!

      1. Vitamins in general may be unnecessary, but there are useful and effective for a specific reason, like if you have a deficiency.

   4. I take the One-a-day women’s formula. Women’s formulas generally have more calcium and folic acid. I also separately take magnesium, vitamin D, and a probiotic.

   5. Kirkland (Costco)

      I supplement it with more Vitamin D because I am low… like everyone… and with more calcium to be sure I get enough.

   6. I asked my doctor at my annual appointment two weeks ago if I should be taking a multivitamin. She said she recommended them for anyone looking to get expensive, vitamin-enriched urine.

   7. I take Vitafusion women’s gummy vitamins. I buy them at CostCo and am pretty consistent in taking them. I think it’s because they’re gummy.

   8. I’m a vegetarian and I take Flinstones with Iron.

   9. A little late but if you’re still reading: my doctor recommended Nature’s Made vitamins or Centrum silver. She said those are the only brands conducting clinical trials on their products. I take Nature’s Made Multi for Her, plus a separate fish oil capsule for omega-3, plus echinacea for immunity and Culturelle probiotics (it’s a lot to take every day, but I make it part of my bedtime routine). They do have a prenatal vitamin with omega-3 DHA, which saves a step.

3. I’m trying to get rid of a pair of basically new Louise et Cie heels (tan, size 10) that are too high for me, thought someone might be interested: http://www.ebay.com/itm/162345973259?ul_noapp=true

4. One of my outside counsels just invented this and I think it’s freaking genius. No affiliation and no benefit to me, I just think it might also save other lawyers on here a ton of time.

   https://www.legalkeyboards.com/

   This is lucy stone using a different name to get attention.

   1. I don’t want to be too critical… but of the features listed, very few of them can’t be done on a normal keyboard with a couple of keystrokes (or a few basic macros).

      1. Our network resets every night and eats our keyboard shortcuts and macros…so for me this is a winner and I am jealous of everyone who has better IT!

5. I need to replace my daily underwear and am looking for recommendations for an all-cotton (or close to it) hiphugger style that’s good for pear shapes with a big butt. I like really simple designs and colors and am more interested in long-lasting fabrics and quality. Any recommendations? Has anyone ever tried Hanro? It seems like the best quality version of what I’m looking for, but potentially a bit too dowdy…

   1. Not cotton, but I swear by the Soma vanishing edge bottoms. I’m a pear and I order up (BR 6 or Athleta S in pants and I order a medium in Soma bottoms). No VPL at all. Have lasted for years with machine washing in a mesh bag and hanging to dry.

      1. Seconded! They are glorious.

         1. Third Soma. It’s actually their semi-annual sale right now. I’m an hourglass with a flat rear but wide hips and and wear their hipster style. I’m a size 6P/8P in pants and wear their underwear in size large.

            I have three different kinds– the embraceable super soft hipsters which look fine on the model but are totally granny p*nties on me. They are extremely comfortable though. The enticing hipsters are silky and are actually my favorite. And the vanishing edge microfiber hipsters are just as great as everyone says, but took me a little while to get used to. IMO they completely replace th*ngs, which I hate but wore grudgingly in the past. I wash all these in the washing machine on no special setting, but I do hang them up to dry. So far they’ve held up well.

      2. These are awesome. I wear nothing else now.

      3. Thanks everyone. This might be TMI, but how’s the odor control with SOMA? I have found that artificial fibers can be a bit less fresh by the end of the day (I’m pretty active).

         1. I haven’t noticed a problem. If I were going to the gym, I’d always bring a fresh pair for after. I live in the SE US where it is always hot and humid.

      4. +1

         Another Soma vanishing edge here. I’m also pear shaped.

         I essentially stopped wearing my Hanky Panky thongs, and Gap cotton boy shorts, and pretty much just wear the Somas.

         I size up for my generous behind, so even though I wear pants in size 2-4 (but no pants ever fit me….), I wear a large in Soma undies. The first time I ordered them, I bought a couple sizes and a couple styles to figure out what works best. So this is a great time to experiment, during a sale.

         I also preferred hipsters until Soma… and then realized that bikinis… when sized correctly for my rear, were the most flattering for my extreme pair shape

   2. So I have similar body type and needs, but the difference is that I see cotton undies as pretty disposable. I like Gap’s underwear because there is a cute color selection and it’s decent quality cotton.

   3. I’ve become a big fan of the Hanes Ultimate ComfortBlend X-Temp briefs, which fit me more like hiphuggers. I’m not proud that my favorite underwear these days come in a multipack, but I am comfortable.

      1. Word. Sometimes, I just really enjoy my Vanity Fair granny panties (Godzilla got back, what can I say?).

         1. Oh and they’re cotton.

            1. for cotton I amazingly like the Duluth Trading Co. undies… they also have wicking ones which are amazing … hot and humid climate, working outside doing lawn and mowing chores, gym, nice and dry.

   4. aerie boy briefs. I like the cotton for sleeping and the lace or silky ones for work. I’ve replaced my whole underwear draw with them (size 8 pear, big butt).

   5. I like the soma Modern brief with the lace at the top. I buy them when they’re 6 for $36

   6. Lively. I have a similar body type and all of my Victoria’s Secret pairs were riding up. Lively is all rayon and are about $8 per pair. They only have a few colors right now though bc they are trying to keep costs down.

   7. I do Hanes bikini or Fruit of the Loom bikini because they are both 100% cotton, fit fine on my pear shape, and are low cost but hold up for a long time. I also love buying 6 or 8 pairs for $10 or less.

   8. Thank you everyone!!

6. I was too late on the morning thread.

   I’m a partner at a big law firm. I’ve never had a financial advisor. The FA of a bigger partner has gotten our names/numbers and Bigger Partner vouched for FA (and FA called).

   FA also just moved on to my street. Big house (mine is a fixer, his has been upgraded and is fancy), fancy cars, kink of a jerk. I get what’s in it for FA, and can’t shake the feeling that there’s nothing in it for me except the obligation to pay him.

   FWIW, I have been a Boglehead since high school. I think I’m fantastic with my money (or would be at least as good as him, but for free) and really think broadly about money and personal finances. [I’m also curious about whether I’d get recommended the same things as Bigger Partner or whether I’m such a small fish that I’d just get rote advice that I could get from reading the WSJ and Kiplingers.]

   How would you be able to gauge whether it was worth the money? [To get rid of this guy, who I have to live near and the Bigger Partner, I will actually have to be nice about letting him down, but I’m really highly annoyed.]

   1. Given your comments about being a Boglehead and having a generally good grasp on your finances, I’d say STEER CLEAR of this guy! You have everything you need already and you can do this.

      1. Agreed. All to many people think that we, as the fair sex, need men to handle our money. That is NOT true. We are completely capable of running our OWN financial affairs, without some blow hard telling us we need them to take 2% every year for manageing our money. FOOEY on men like that. For me, I have learned alot and can manage my OWN money, tho I let Dad run things b/c it makes him feel good that me, a lawyer and partner at law, look to him to do that for me, even tho I am OVER 35 now. I say DOUBEL FOOEY to men who think they are smarter then we are MONEY WIZE. When I get MARRIED, I will let my husband do that for me, NOT b/c he is smarter, but b/c I want to give HIM something to do to think he is better. But DEEP DOWN, I know better. YAY!!!!!

   2. What is it with financial advisors???

      I get cold calls all the time with a lot of intrustive financial questions from a complete stranger:
      – how much $ do you have to invest
      – who manages your money
      – what do you do with your money now

      I have what weird thing where I’d talk about all sorts of things, but never about money, especially to a stranger. “I have about $100K I’d like to invest — perhaps you can talk me into buying a bridge?”

      Never anything to say why the cold caller is any good at things, not what cold caller’s background is, not that cold caller cares about what my values or philosophy might be. Ugh.

      1. Financial advisers drive me batty. At my old firm, they would sucker one young associate who didn’t know any better into a “5 minute meeting” which they would then parlay into “I’ve worked with XYZ in your firm” when they proceeded to call everyone else in the firm on the basis of ‘everyone is working with me!’ LIES! At the end of the day, they are salesmen who not only need a management fee from you, but are also heavily pressured to sell you other instruments like insurance policies that might not fit your needs. I was particularly incensed when at age 22 someone from my high school called me on my cell phone at 7am to discuss being my financial planner. Excuse me, you just graduated college an archaeology major and I do not remember you being smart when you were in high school, now you want to ask about my finances at 7am and manage them?! (He had a rich dad that worked in finance, which I guess qualified him for this job at 22.)

         1. This is why I screen my calls.

            1. I can’t avoid them though: on my street, the parent of a child who is school friends with my child (AND we go to the same pool), etc. You can’t small talk with them b/c it always gets steered into a sales pitch. It’s worse than the MLM stuff — I’ve successfully avoided that, but I feel that financial advisers / financial planners are everywhere. I used to do a lite version of this when I did estate planning (like: do you have disability insurance, do you have life insurance, do you have life insurance on the nonworking spouse, do you have a business or are you an employee, what about nonprobate assets, what about diversification (DOCTORS – do not buy the building your practice is in — that is not diversification!)).

            2. So they live on the same street. What’s gonna happen if you are direct? If they keep pushing, why can’t you go “Please stop bringing up financial planning every time we get together, I’m just here to enjoy some time with my kids.”?

   3. You are overthinking this. Are you otherwise in the market for a financial advisor (sounds like no)? Do you know anything detailed about Big Partner’s financial situation other than he’s higher up the ladder and, therefore, makes more money than you? For all you know, Big Partner didn’t start saving until s/he was 50 and has some serious medical needs in the future that need specialized planning.
      This is how FAs and insurance agents get clients- they work off of the networks of existing clients. Not every introduction turns into a client so FA is likely used to being told no, thanks. If you are happy with your rate of return for your needs and think that it’s at or above market, then I don’t think you need to hire someone to tweak it.

   4. You didn’t ask for FA’s information, he just cold called you and Big Partner said that FA is great? There is no need to gauge whether FA would be worth the money. Just say no thank you. You are under zero obligation to give this any further thought.

   5. Be polite but firm. Nice to meet you, but I am not looking for a financial advisor at this time. I am comfortable with where I am at financially, have a solid plan and am meeting my goals. Appreciate your time and insights and if I need something in the future, now I know where to look!

   6. On this morning’s thread, there seemed to be some consensus that below 500K to invest, FAs might not add value (and certainly if you had <$100K). And the ones that add value, it was for people who probably want someone to figure out their bigger financial picture (which you probably don't need and even if you did, this guy may not be any good at).

      1. I missed this on the earlier thread but this is helpful – thanks!

   7. Steer clear. This is now financial advisors get new clients. They buddy up with wealthy people and then aggressively target that person’s network. I do not like that your bigger partner seems to be part of the pitch. That feels unethical. I’d want my personal finances as far away from my boss’s personal finances as possible.

      1. I have gotten a lot of these calls. Just say it was nice to meet them but you aren’t looking for any assistance right now. They give up and go away easily.

7. I have been travelling a lot and have found myself needed emergency supplies. My lack of foresight has resulted in a lot of hassles, and so I decided to put together a “life survival” kit to carry with my on trips and to/from work. So far I have…

   Gum/Mints
   Ibuprofen
   Allergy medication
   Band-Aids
   Hand sanitizer
   Extra contacts/saline solution
   Chapstick
   Pocket comb
   Hair tie
   “Emergency makeup” – sample sized concealer, powder and lipstick
   Tampon
   Tweezers

   Most of these are based on real life emergencies! :) Any other ideas?

   1. Lotion, nail file and nail clippers. Not that you’re grooming your nails at your desk, but it’s nice to have one if you have a hangnail that’s driving you nuts.

      1. I clip my nails at my desk. It’s the only time I notice they are too long (typing) and I can’t stand it. I actually clip them over my garbage can. Is that really that gross? If so, sorry.

         1. I don’t begrudge someone a nail here and there, but the clipping and filing sounds of doing your whole routine is very intrusive. I recently left a job where my neighbor killed time just about every other day by manicuring in her cube and I am glad to be away from it. Your cube neighbors might appreciate if you saved it for home. If you have an office, proceed!

         2. Sorry, I’m speaking as someone with a fairly open office. In a closed-door office or even a cube, I think it’s fine.

         3. I find it gaggingly gross for some reason. Can you go to the bathroom to do it?

            1. LOL, I have an office and promise to close my door.

            2. Ah yes, that’s perfect! People do it here in the cube farm and it makes me want to run away.

         4. I don’t find it gross. People have trash cans and all that in their cube.

   2. The stuff I keep in my tote bag/purse when I travel, since I regularly use it all, includes a travel pill case, hair ties, pantyliners/tampons, hand sanitizer, and hand lotion. I figure anything else I need can live at the drugstore for me to go buy it when I need it, rather than schlepping it all over the place. I have yet to travel somewhere for work where I can’t readily buy stuff.

   3. FLOSS

      Easier to tote around than a toothbrush but does the same thing.

      1. Agree. I have those floss stick/brush things in my purse sundries bag

         1. +1

            I really like these, and much quicker/less of a procedure than flossing.

   4. Gas Ex strips and neosporin go with me everywhere.

      1. Along these lines, a tiny pack/bag/jar/whatever of immodium. You never seem to have it when you realize you need it RIGHT THAT SECOND.

   5. Sorry, this “emergency” list made me chuckle. The only items on that list I would consider kind of an emergency are tampons, contacts/solution (assuming you don’t have glasses as a back-up), and allergy meds, assuming your allergies are debilitating.

      You should add a couple doses of whatever medication you are taking if you really want it to be a life survival kit and those meds are necessary for your survival.

      1. When you have really, really bad breath and you need to network … it’s an emergency ;)

      2. OR … a stray hair that magically sprouts out of your cheek during a team meeting.

         I just realized that being human is weird and hard.

         1. I never need tweezers more desperately than when I am in a foreign place, usually after everywhere that could possibly sell them is closed. Now there are “emergency” tweezers in all my travel bags.

   6. Safety pins and/or needle & thread.

   7. Do you get heartburn? I once got it really, really badly on an airplane and couldn’t do anything about it. When I landed, I was able to buy some tums but it was cutting it close for my connection. I now carry heartburn relief with me everywhere.

   8. Toss some cash – $20-40 – in there.

      I have also found it helpful to have a travel sized packet of wet wipes handy. I don’t really like hand sanitizer and find it helpful to actually be able to wipe something off.

      Lastly, jot down names / phone numbers of emergency contacts, both in case something happens to you and because no one memorizes phone numbers anymore – if your cell phone is out of commission, you’re out of luck.

      1. Thanks for the reminder on keeping a list of phone numbers. I kept meaning to do it but never getting around to it. I just wrote my emergency contact and other phone numbers that I might need on the back of my business card and tucked one in my wallet and one in my planner.

   9. I do pack a little emergency kit for travel but not for every day use. I’d add nail clippers, Neosporin and hydrocortisone lotion.

   10. I have a kit that I keep in my handbag since 50% of my time on the road, which contains:
       2 tampons
       A pen + extra ink cartridge
       A external charger, mini USB cable, iPhone cable, headphones and a USB port plug
       Chewing gum
       Tissues
       A plastic bag that you need for liquids in airports
       A mini lint roller
       A mini glass nail file
       Small bottle clear nail polish (for snags on tights, protect hang nails, trim frayed ends, even insect bites)
       Painkillers
       Hair tie
       An all use oil like Nuxe
       Tweezers

8. So, I went with my husband to visit his family in a South American country that has Zika over the holidays, and I’m having major regrets that we didn’t freeze his sp*rm beforehand because we want to TTC, and the CDC recommends waiting 6 months for the man, even if neither partner has displayed symptoms. This feels like forever. Also, his dad is sick, so he’s likely to be visiting them again before the 6 months is up, and on and on… Am I just supposed to wait until we can find a 6-month window with no trips to South America? This sounds sort of insane. FWIW, I’m young enough (in my early thirties) but already will have more space between my kids that I really wanted. I called my OB/GYN office, and it’s not possible for me to get a test if I’m only TTC but not pregnant. I could start trying in a several (eight, which is what they recommend for asymtomatic women whose partners don’t also have potential exposure?) weeks and then get the test when I’m pregnant, but this doesn’t seem ideal, obviously. Can someone give me a reality check?

   1. Did he get bites? Most people know when they have a mosquito bite, so if he literally didn’t get a single bite I can’t imagine there’s much to worry about it. But I would talk to your OB. The six month is a general guideline for most people who can delay travel (i.e., fun vacations) to Zika zones. Since he has recurring non-optional travel, they’ll probably just advise you to go ahead, and your OB will likely be able to give you some info about just how small the risk really is.

      1. Also worth pointing out that we all take tons of risk when pregnant and when we have babies. Driving a baby around in a car every day is a far, far bigger risk than going to a Zika country, but we do it anyway because for most people it’s not optional. It’s all about risks v. rewards and if you’re just going for fun, it makes sense to go at a different time if possible. But in your case, the upside of him traveling to SA now probably outweighs the infinitesimal risk.

      2. Just FYI, I got malaria in Africa and had not realized I had been bitten – it is possible.

         1. ME TOO. (Not Africa, elsewhere, but I didn’t know I had it until I was having weird symptoms after moving back to the states and they tested for it.)

   2. Just FYI, even if you did freeze his sp*rm, they would require it be quarantined for 6 months before use. That’s not a Zika thing; it’s required for all known-donor inseminations.

      1. Lol really? Even for a married couple? Sorry I find that sort of hilarious, I can imagine the conversations that people are having with their doctors over that. “But he’s my husband. You do realize he injects it directly into me on a regular basis?”

      2. No, not for a married couple, they just do the standard STI panel before freezing and then go. The six month rule is for insemination by known man who is not married to or, in some cases, intimate with, inseminee.

         Yes, I know, this is punishing anyone who is family building in a non-heteronormative way. Trust me, been there.

   3. OP here. Thanks for the perspective, all. I think I’ll talk to my OB about the situation but tentatively plan for starting at the 8-week mark. Gosh, at least in my last pregnancy I waited until I had actually conceived before driving myself crazy with what-ifs…!

9. Just wanted to say how much I enjoy the hive and coming to this spot everyday for a break from work. I got 3 fantastic recs here at the end of 2016 (and I’m sure I’m overlooking some others): (1) the blog, A Slob Comes Clean, (2)The New York Times obituary book as a gift idea, and (3) the Intelex microwaveable stuffed animals, which I gifted to each of my kids and my elderly MIL.

   1. I gifted a microwaveable stuffed animal, too, based on recs here! I also enjoy the little tidbits I get from this group. Thanks all!

      1. I did too, and it was a huge hit!

   2. I sent my husband the link to the microwaveable fox and “suggested” he buy it for me as a stocking stuffer. I’m subtle like that. It is awesome.

   3. Lol! I also gifted The NY Times obit book and bought myself the heated animal thingy.

   4. Also bought obit book as a gift and “suggested” my brother buy me the microwaveable owl.

      Also, ELIGIBLE. Thanks, Hive. Loved it. Might post tomorrow to get other similar book reccs.

10. Trip to Miami in Feb — is it possible to spend 4-5 days without getting bored? The age range will be 30s-70s. We’re not sit on the beach all day people (not even sure if that’s an option in Feb) but will go to the beach just to take in the views for a few hrs etc.

    Can anyone list out possible activities/attractions? The only “must do” activity is some kind of boat tour that allows us to check out the skyline + see some mansions on the water.

    Are there hotels in any area that is pretty walkable/good for people watching — so we can walk out to get coffee or dinner or window shopping? I feel like Florida has a lot of those kinds of small towns though I don’t know if Miami is like that. (i.e. was in Orlando recently and loved the feel of Winter Park – suburb/town with it’s own walkable “downtown” that was actually pretty lively bc there were so many food options).

    1. Just go to South Beach. I can’t imagine being bored there. And you can walk to the beach and everything. Lincoln Road (which is like my mall at home but fantastico).

    2. The weather is very warm and beachy year-round so that’s definitely an option if you want it. I feel like 5 days might be a bit long to be in the city itself. You might do a daytrip to Key Largo or the Everglades (Key West is too far unless you stay overnight). Miami has a great food scene and I never plan much there except eating and beaching so I can’t really help as far as activities. For hotels, if you want to stay in Miami Beach you might look in the Lincoln Road area – it’s a cute pedestrian street with a lot of shopping.

    3. Honestly, I think Miami might be pretty boring if you aren’t into lounging at the beach (or the pool), food, nightlife or luxury shopping. It doesn’t really have tourist attractions the way NYC, Chicago, or SF does. I enjoy hanging out there precisely because I don’t have a list of things to do, which makes it more relaxing than travel to other cities. I liked the Miami Seaquarium as a kid, but they’ve received negative press recently for their refusal to move their lonely killer whale who lives in the smallest tank in the US, so I won’t go there now on principle.

    4. We did a everglades tour which was a lot of fun. The tour operator “Airboat in Everglades”offers private boats and they will arrange pick-up/drop-off at hotels in South Beach. Really convenient if you don’t have a rental car.
       Also, because it’s a private boat tour, you can get closer to the alligators than on the big-group boats. It was the highlight of our South Beach vacation!

11. I vote yes. Do you like art? Miami has had sort of an art boom in the past 10 years or so, with lots of cool galleries (and the accompanying cool “scene”), especially around Wynwood. An excursion to the Everglades would be fun, as would a few hours around Little Havana to see what Calle Ocho is like and have a Cuban meal. There are fun fancy hotel bars on Collins Ave in South Beach as well as ridiculous clubs around there, if that’s your scene. There are boutique hotels you can find in South Beach in the “South of Fifth” neighborhood, which is not right in the midst of all the craziness. An alternative to the boat tour is renting a kayak and paddling around by yourselves. I did this a few times with guests when I lived in Miami, and it was always a hit. There are great restaurants, but I’ve been gone long enough that I can’t give reliable recommendations…

    1. Oops, this was obviously for the Miami question above.

12. A friend at work turned me onto MealPal and I signed up as a part of my New Years Resolutions to 1) be more aware of how I’m spending my money / cut down on unnecessary purchases and 2) be more thoughtful about eating healthy foods or really enjoying a splurge.

    I know these aren’t unique goals, so thought I would pass along! I love that I select my lunch the night before at 5pm (I’m the worst at grocery shopping when hungry and picking healthy choices in the cafeteria at noon when my stomach is growling and it’s crowded is hard!). I’ve been exploring new restaurants more and have been walking about 15 minutes at lunch. And best of all, because it’s a subscription I’ve prepaid for and I don’t pay for my meal when I pick it up, I don’t even bring my wallet with me to get lunch. No more picking up the $2 bag of chips, $3 drink, and $2 cookie at the checkout counter, blowing my budget and health goals.

    Now… does anyone have any good advice for similarly automating my breakfast? I’ve been keeping single oatmeal packets in my desk, but I feel like they have a lot of sugar because I only really like the ones that are cinnamon apple or maple brown sugar. What’s your favorite easy, inexpensive breakfast That i can have at my desk? I wish I could just make my own avocado toast each day, but we’re not allowed to have appliances like toasters on our floor.

    1. Are you willing to make breakfast at home and bring it to the office? In colder months I eat oatmeal most mornings. Every Sunday I portion out oats, chia seeds, dried fruit, cinnamon, and salt in 5 containers. Every morning I put water + almond milk + the oats into a pot, cook it (for about 3-4 minutes), add some sweetener, and put it in a thermos and top it with whatever I want (pb, chopped apple, nuts). If you put hot water in the thermos before filling it, the oatmeal stays hot for a while.

       In warmer months I do something very similar with smoothies (prepackaged bags of fruit + veggies).

       1. You can also do overnight oats — put all those ingredients in the jar at night and stick it in the fridge. It’s ready to eat in the morning. You can even eat it cold, which I’ve done, or pop it in the microwave for a minute to warm it. It also won’t get mushy for at least a couple of days. I’ve taken several servings with me on weekend camping trips before and the second morning it tastes just the same as the first. I’ve never tried more than 2 days though.

          My favorite is oatmeal + almond milk + blueberries + peanut butter + honey. Tastes like a peanut butter sandwich.

    2. I am a big breakfast eater and I have found the following to be convenient at work: cereal (I kept a box of cereal in my drawer and used a coffee cup, spoon and milk from the kitchen), yogurt and granola (individual yogurt packs and granola in a ziploc, alternatively you can keep a bag of granola at your desk), and apple and peanut butter (bring apple, peanut butter in desk). The only thing is these are all sweet meals and they aren’t satisfying when I’m craving something savory.

       I also do green smoothies frequently in the morning, though you have to make those at home. Often I’ll make it early and then freeze it and throw it in my lunch bag so it functions as an ice pack. I’ll then sip on it when it’s the right temperature about an hour after I get into work.

    3. Get a thing of plain oatmeal (or packets, if you prefer) and bring in an eyedropper bottle of vanilla extract, some cinnamon, some honey, and maybe a bag of nuts. Add a few drops of vanilla extract and a dash of cinnamon to your plain oatmeal before you cook it and then top with a swirl of honey and a sprinkling of nuts. The cheapest way is to buy a huge cannister of oats and buy nuts in the bulk section of your grocery store – much better than sugary packets. You could also skip the honey and add fruit, presumably dried fruit like raisins would keep best in your desk drawer.

    4. Homemade overnight oats will get you the same outcome without the added sugar or processing. I make them in batches for the week on Sunday night. I use unsweetened almond milk, coconut flakes, chia seeds, cinnamon, a dab of maple syrup, and rotate between adding bananas, berries, apple, and pumpkin. Final step is a spoonful of peanut or almond butter that I keep in my desk.

       1. My other easy option would be Greek yogurt cups with berries and granola.

          1. Or berries and nuts. Maybe swirl in a bit of honey or jam if you are eating unsweetened yogurt and berries are not sweet enough. So filling

    5. My Trader Joe’s has a frozen (prepared) oatmeal that I find delicious and much less cloyingly sweet than packets. Not flavored, just lightly sweetened, so you can add toppings if you like fruit or whatever.

       1. Brand rec: BetterOats makes a line called “OatFit” that has zero sugar. It does contain artificial sweeteners, however.

          Also hard-boiled eggs are easy, cheap and convenient.

13. My new years resolution is to adopt healthier kitchen habits and invest in healthier cooking tools. To me, this means things like cooking with better oils, cutting out unhealthy ingredients, and switching from glass to plastic tupperware. Those are things I’ve identified so far, but I am sure there are other changes, big or small, that I haven’t even thought of. What healthy habits do you have in the kitchen that you’d recommend?

    For the upgrading to healthier kitchen tools part, I’m kind of overwhelmed. It seems to be a how-far-down-the-rabbit-hole-do-you-want-to-go situation. I am replacing our pans because the cheap nonstick is scratching off and I’m trying to remove plastics for anything that’s heated and comes into contact with food, but I don’t want to get rid of my microwave or dishwasher. Does anyone have a health-conscious blogger or information source they like that’s not too extreme?

    1. Try Wellness Mama. She might be a tad on the extreme side for you, but all of her articles are well-sourced and it’s not too overwhelming. My tips are to invest in stainless steel or cast iron cookware and to completely avoid non-stick (especially if you have kids or pets) and to continue doing what you’re doing re: plastic (assuming you have a typo above and you’re switching FROM plastic TO glass).

       1. Ah yes, switching from plastic to glass. My mistake! I’ll check out Wellness Mama. I ordered the GreenPan Healthy pans which are ceramic nonstick, but maybe I should exchange them for something stainless. I wasn’t aware nonstick is itself a problem. As a side note, what’s the best material for cooking utensils? Wood doesn’t always do the trick but it seems like metal would scratch.

          1. Silicone works well! It’s not quite as stiff as plastic, but it usually gets the job done. You won’t regret putting in the time to do this now; it’s basically a buy-the-good-stuff-and-done kind of thing. I used to have the GreenPans as well, but I got rid of them because there are questions about what kind of “replacement” chemicals are in the coating (they don’t have to be tested for safety). I’ve since gotten used to stainless steel and have had very few problems. A rough rule of thumb I use is that if a cooking material existed in my grandmother’s time, it’s probably okay for me to use – that includes cast iron, steel, enamel, copper, glass, etc.

             1. Second silicone. I have this set

                https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B011913YDI/ref=s9_acsd_al_bw_c_x_3_w

                Cheap, super easy to clean, and won’t melt if I accidentally leave it on the pan like my plastic spatula did, ewewewew.

             2. I like silicone as well for this. I recommend whatever you buy be a single piece. Mine have the silicone layer covering the entire spatula. We had a set before that had a separate spatula and handle, which I didn’t realize until accidentally pulling it apart when washing it. There was a lot of gross stuff in there that I couldn’t see until it pulled apart. Those went in the trash immediately and I sought out a new set of 1-piece silicone spatulas.

          2. Eh, I think that the ceramic non-stick pans and replacing them when they start to scratch/flake, takes care of a large portion of the worries about non-stick. I don’t use non-stick for much- eggs and pancakes are about it. The rest of our cookware is old cast iron, Le Creuset, and a set of stainless pots. Those handle the vast majority of our meals.

             1. Not really, though – the off-gassing from non-stick pans kills pet birds, whether the pan is new or not, and chemicals produced by DuPont that are used in Teflon have been linked to various cancers. Glad you hear you use a lot of other materials too, though.

                Another thing I’ve seen recommended on this blog that I would definitely advise against is using plastic liners in the slow cooker. That’s a definite no-go because cooking food slowly in plastic over low heat basically maximizes the impact of endocrine-disrupting chemicals like BPA. If you store your food in plastic, that’s one thing, but cooking it in plastic? That’s really bad, and really easily avoidable.

             2. The off-gassing kills birds if you cook your nonstick pan at 680F. If you’re able to cook your eggs that hot, hats off to you. The coating is only bad when cooked to a high temp. Nonstick flakes are gross, but inert so you’re not going to really have much trouble if you end up ingesting them.

    2. This was me a few years ago, and I would recommend taking things a step at a time and not obsessing too much, because it can become overwhelming when you realize that everything around you is toxic to some degree. I feel like I’ve moderated a bit, because the perfect was becoming the enemy of the good — e.g., I realize toting around leftovers was so much easier with tupperware than with other alternatives, and it’s better for my health and wallet than buying my lunch elsewhere. I don’t microwave my food in tupperware, but I do still put it in the top rack of the dishwasher.

       I have a high-quality cast-iron pan that I prefer to my non-stick pan, but I still use the non-stick, because it is so convenient (although yes, if your non-stick coating is flaking off, get rid of it!). On another rabbit-hole note, the best cast iron skillets are from years and years ago, and you can find good ones on eBay… but contemporary ones are also perfectly fine).

       In terms of general healthy food habits, I find that soup filled with beans and veggies is always the answer :)

       1. You can get glass or stainless steel tupperware for cheap – check out Lunchbots! Stainless steel might be better since it’s lighter.

       2. We’ve been doing a lot of soups, and more beans in general as a substitute to meat. But I do need to up my soups-with-beans game. Good idea!

          We have an old cast iron skillet, but I hate using it. It’s so heavy! I’ll pull it out of the cabinet to use in the interim while I replace our nonstick. Maybe I’ll get used to it.

       3. Agree re moderating and not obsessing about this. My coworker told me when his wife was doing her oncology rotation she had a phase of obsessive trying-to-get-rid-of-all-plastic in their kitchen, and they found it unworkable. Her rule now is that she doesn’t heat food in plastic and avoids teflon pans, and that’s what I do as well. I have both glass and plastic food containers I bring my lunch in, depending on whether it’s something that requires heating. I’ve never tried stainless steel containers, but for me the point is not _heating_ the plastic, so a cold salad can go in a plastic container and it’s fine.

          For non-stick pans, I use ceramic coated cast iron. It’s also more durable than teflon, which is a plus.

    3. Why on earth would you have to get rid of your microwave and dishwasher to be healthier?
       We use glass and ceramic for food storage as much as we can, but also keep the BPA free bags for vacuum sealing and some BPA free plastic containers for lunches and such. I’m careful with my non-stick and enameled cookware so as not to scratch it. For those pieces, I use plastic, silicone or wooden utensils, not metal one. It’s a bit of trade-off. Otherwise, minimize food waste and buy quality ingredients are our goals.

       1. I’ve come across a few articles questioning the safety of radiation exposure from microwaves (in the food itself or standing near it while its on) or the chemical buildup from dishwasher detergent. Both seem ridiculous to me.

          1. So I shouldn’t be standing directly in front of the microwave intently watching my food cook? Oops.

             1. I still do it, too. Burned/melted food is a travesty!

             2. If you’re okay with using your cell phone near your head, you should definitely be okay with standing by a microwave: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/10/health/10real.html

    4. As far as ingredients go, I recommend reading Michael Pollan’s Food Rules. It’s a short read, but it helped my husband and I set some parameters about what we buy. One of them is not to buy things with ingredients you can’t pronounce or that don’t exist in nature, so that basically cuts out all processed food. Another has to do with “unhealthy” food and basically says that you can have it when you make it yourself (so, we don’t buy cookies, but I make them from time to time). We also belonged to a CSA for about a year, and it really expanded our familiarity with what’s in season in our area and how to cook various vegetables.

       Avoid the Food Babe. She’s full of sh*t.

       I honestly can’t say that I’ve thought too much about whether my kitchen tools are healthy, besides not owning many non-stick pans and replacing the ones that I do have every few years. I’m not aware of any credible scientific evidence that microwaves are bad for you.

       1. I’ll check out Pollan’s book, thanks! We cut out partially hydrogenated oils, but I know there are a ton of other ingredients that are bad. The pronunciation rule is a good catch-all. I’ve also been implementing the make-it-yourself rule for unhealthy foods and it’s cut down a ton. I have a major sweet tooth and I still like baked goods, but when I see that a stick of butter goes into the batter I’m much better about self control.

    5. What?!? This is all crazy. Completely crazy. You want to be healthier? Stop eating red meat and go for a walk. Your dishwasher isn’t killing you.

    6. I use glass straws, all steel or glass cook ware, glass Tupperware, no plastic bags, no microwave, no coffee maker (french press instead), shade grown coffee, CSA veggies, dried goods from a co-op, no meat or eggs or dairy, no artificial sweeteners, I make my own bread/pizza dough/cookies etc. But I know I’m extreme and most people won’t ever care enough to go that far

14. I know I’m a little late to the thread, but does anyone have recommendations for a last-minute long weekend visit to Charleston?

    1. Activities: Charleston City Market, Fort Sumter, kayaking/dolphins if you’re into that, Old Slave Mart Museum
       General roaming: Ravenal Bridge, Waterfront Park, Rainbow Row, Battery & White Point Gardens
       Food: FIG, Husk, Circa 1886, Poogan’s Porch, Cru Cafe, SNOB, Le Farfalle
       Further out: Shem Creek, Charleston Tea Plantation, Angel Oak Tree

    2. I really liked Middleton Place. Beautiful gardens and well-contextualized, non-sanitized history.

    3. More food: The Darling Oyster Bar, Peninsula Grill

15. I have some money in Vanguard index funds that I intend to use for a down payment on a house in the next 1-2 years. I’m no longer comfortable keeping the money in these funds and would like to sell and just let the money sit in a savings account until needed. Generally speaking, I know about long term and short term capital gains taxes, but assuming different buy in periods is there an easy way to determine how much I’ll owe in taxes before I sell.

    1. Your broker (or online system if you don’t have one) should be able to generate an unrealized gain/loss report that indicates the short and long term portions. Then you can estimate using your applicable tax rates.

       1. I’ll check this out. Thanks!

16. Would you notice if mid-20s/associate level woman was wearing a men’s style Rolex? If so, would you make any assumptions or have any negative thoughts?

    Context: I received my late grandfather’s watch as a college graduation gift and have been wearing it ever since (4 years). I work in finance so such watches are quite common, but recently I’ve started wondering if it looks flashy or out of place for someone my age, especially since it is a larger men’s watch.

    I love the watch, especially for its sentimental value, but I don’t want to give the impression that I am frivolous or spoiled.

    1. Wear it with pride!

       1. +1

          Was there something that triggered this recent wondering? If it hasn’t been a problem in 4 years why would it be now?

          1. I was out socially and an acquaintance complimented my watch. I was surprised he noticed and it made me wonder!

             Thanks all for the feedback. I will continue to wear it and remember happy memories!

    2. Of all the people I’ve ever met across the range of wealth and personality, it has always been actions and not possessions that give the impression of someone being spoiled or frivolous.

       I say wear it with pride. People who make negative assumptions usually also tend to have the gall to comment. In which case you say, “it’s my late grandfather’s. I love being reminded of him every day – it’s a real sadness that he’s no longer here to share my joys after the enormous impact he had on me.” If that doesn’t shut them up, they have no shame.

    3. The only people who will really notice your watch are people who are into watches. They would more judge you for wearing a Michael kors watch than a Rolex

    4. As long. As it’s not. A birkin.

17. What are your favorite spotify playlists to listen to at work? I’m tired of all of mine.

    Anything upbeat, English or Spanish, suitable to listen to while working

    Music really puts me in a better headspace that helps with open office.

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