Weekend Open Thread

419 Comments

1. For the ‘Rette who was looking for flat wedding shoes!

   Check out the Cole Haan Air Bacara Ballet flat. If those had been around four months ago when I was buying my wedding shoes, I would have had serious competition for my shoes!

2. Okay, I’m way into this dress. But friends! I have a getting-a-raise question with which only you can help.

   I work at a large university in a non-professorial capacity. I was hired two years ago for an entry-level job, and this summer I was given a promotion complete with a new title and a significantly expanded list of responsibilities. The new title was created for me; I work in an industry that doesn’t have many middle positions–there’s an awful lot of entry-level assistants and an awful lot of been-there-for-decades senior people, but not much room in between. When I was told about the promotion in July, I was promised that there would be money forthcoming this winter, as the university had instituted a salary freeze over the summer.

   I’ve been doing lots of really good work lately, and my boss has been explicit about how deeply he appreciates it. He’s hinted that we’ll be meeting this week to discuss the raise that was promised over the summer, so here’s my quandary: would it be appropriate to ask if the raise could be instituted retroactively, such that I receive a lump sum bonus for the past five months in addition to the higher salary going forward?

   I have no idea what the etiquette is here, especially at a university where salaries are very carefully controlled. I will be unsurprised if the answer to the above question is no, but I think I should at least ask if you ladies deem it appropriate.

   1. I used to work at a public university and am now at a private one. I totally get the budget issue, especially given the former experience. However, I do think it is appropriate to ask. I’m not going to say “the worst that could happen is they say no!” because we both know that dynamics at work are more complex than that. However, this raise was promised a significantly long time ago, and I do think you should ask. Choose the words carefully, and do not call it a “lump sum bonus.” First of all, it wouldn’t be a “bonus”–it would be the raise to your salary that was promised, based on your promotion. Second, it doesn’t necessarily need to come in a lump sum. Sometimes payroll has to do these things in installments, and you don’t want to rule that out by saying “lump sum” when that isn’t really what you’re asking for. You just want the raise to be retroactive, however that can be worked out.

   2. Yes, you should ask. If you don’t, you have zero chance of getting it. That said, I agree with Monday. Ask if it can be retroactive, but don’t be so specific about how it gets paid out. While a lump sum would be nice, it will be just as nice to get it in installments. Good luck!

   3. Yes, you should ask. If you don’t, you have zero chance of getting it. That said, I agree with Monday. Ask if it can be retroactive, but don’t be so specific about how it gets paid out. While a lump sum would be nice, it will be just as nice to get it in installments. Good luck!

3. This is late in the weekend, but hopefully someone will see it. I’ve been reading posts here for a long time, but it is my first time posting. I know I’ve seen people writing about student loan questions, so I hope someone can point me in the right direction.

   I just graduated from law school in May. I have a bunch of loans with Great Lakes, which seems to do a good job with notifying me about due dates, etc. And then I have one loan that somehow got sold to Sallie Mae, which is a whole different ballgame.

   Sallie keeps sending me these notices that I have a payment due…on 3/8/13. I don’t get it. Should I pay it as if the notice said 3/8/12? Should I pay it as of 12/20/11, which is the due date on every other loan I have with Great Lakes, and seems about right, based on a May graduation date?

   Thanks for any advice!

   1. Do they have a number you can call and ask? I would just call to make sure it’s not a typo.

   2. Did you pre-pay any of that loan? I know sometimes when I made larger than normal payments, the loan company (which was neither GL or Sallie) would change the due date to be like 1 year away. But the automatically debited payments would proceed as usual. Otherwise, they might have your graduation date wrong.

      Are you going to consolidate with the federal gov Direct Loan program? If your loans qualify, it might be a good idea. At a minimum, you have fewer due dates to track and only one customer service system to fight with.

   3. My grace period with Sallie Mae was weird too. I’d call to confirm the first payment date as well as what the estimated payment is. Keep track of when you call and who you speak with just in case something becomes an issue.

      Sadly this is nothing. Wait until they start calling you every 3 days to alert you that your first payment is coming due. Even after you’ve already paid it. I’m sorry your loan got sold to them. They’ve been the worst of all my student loan companies to deal with.

      1. Thanks for the replies–I did try to call, but they are closed Sundays–I knew someone here would have info for me in the meantime.

         KK, I would never have thought of that, but I bet that is what happened. I paid off the accrued interest in one big payment back in October so that it wouldn’t get capitalized. I haven’t signed up for auto-pay yet, so maybe they just advanced it?

         I have been putting off consolidating until I make the first few payments and see how annoying it is. Is there any benefit to consolidating besides just making one payment vs. 8 small ones? I was sort of hoping that if I didn’t consolidate, the government would soon come up with some kind of interest rate relief for student loans for which I would be eligible :) Wishful thinking…

   4. Definitely call. They sent me a notice once that I had a loan due before I even graduated law school. Whoops.

      Also, if they do the irritating call reminder thing someone mentioned above, tell them you only want written or e-mail correspondence.

      I chose not to consolidate so that I can pay off my 8.5% loans before my 6% ones. I did a lot of research and talking to my finaid office before I graduated, and unless you are going to do IBR, it doesn’t really make a difference whether or not you consolidate unless you just can’t stand making those payments to different servicers every month.

4. I’m wondering how much money biglaw first years need to give assistants at the holidays. I have heard $100 thrown out quite a few times, but I’ve been at the firm for only a little over a month and am not eligible for a bonus this year. Before I got hired, I was unemployed for a very long time, so despite my now-large salary and my relatively frugal lifestyle, I have almost no savings and massive amounts of (loan) debt. $100 would really eat into my monthly budget. Is it ok to give around $25 in cash/gift card and maybe something else nice like flowers? I don’t want to be seen as a cheapskate but I really can’t afford more.

   1. Give what you can afford. I think assistants are just happy to be acknowledged. You could personalize it by baking cookies or something – much more thoughtful than just throwing a couple hundred in a card and being done with it (not that there’s anything wrong with that approach, since that’s my plan this year LOL!)

   2. Not in your field, and agree you don’t need to give more than you can afford — but a holiday gift to an assistant (whose helpfulness or lack thereof can really impact your worklife) may be a very good investment. Doesn’t have to just be about the $ amount, but conveying appreciation.

   3. I would write them (whichever them it is) a thank you note that spells out how thankful you are for their help in the last month. That should make it clear that you are really not on the hook for the whole year.

      But as someone who really appreciates / needs holiday tips and works with others who do, be careful that you don’t get labeled as being bad at tipping. We definitely remember. (One person who ought to tip me always arranges to go on vacation right at the end of the semester. Every year. So obnoxious!)

      If you do go with gift cards, try to make them at least a little bit personalized: Android marketplace for smartphone users who don’t have iPhones instead of App Store cards, for instance. One person I work for picks up her Bliss beauty gift sets for her assistants for the holidays — it’s super nice, but cash would go to my student loans.

      But people should understand this once since you haven’t been there long.

   4. I’d say give the $25 plus whatever you would send on flowers as cash in a card with a nice, handwritten note of appreciation. Assistants in my office make or break us. Granted we are in court on20 cases a day so that is very different than you do, but I have found that a nice note of appreciation goes a very long way towards making sure I get excellent support.

      1. My apologies or the horrid grammar. I should not post from my phone. Lesson learned.

   5. Ask senior associates in your practice group (or even better, someone who shares your secretary) what the firm’s norms are. The rule of thumb at my firm was something like $50 per year of experience, so first years give $50, second years give $100, and so on.

      1. What about spreading it out? I would feel much more appreciated if I wasn’t only thanked once per year. Just saying. And agree with the note and something thoughtful if you can’t do the $$$.

5. As a former biglaw attorney, I’d say consider giving what other first years give, especially if you have a good working relationship with your assistant (if he / she is not doing much for you or giving you attitude, then I’d say go with 50% of the amount that’s the standard for first years who started earlier). I get that you are nervous about digging yourself out of your debt but your income is still substantially higher than your assistant’s.

   And congrats on getting the job! Take a deep breath, you’re employed now, and if you stick it out for a few years and live somewhat frugally you will pay down your debt substantially.

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