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Weekend Open Thread

Something on your mind? Chat about it here.
Pictured: Set of 6 Chai Mugs,on sale for $29.99 $19.99 at SmartBargains.

162 Comments

    1. i got a jacket there on sale and it was enormous in the waist compared to shoulder size. can’t speak to the quality, because i gave it away, but if you don’t have a straight build, i don’t recommend their jackets.

    2. I have two blazers from Old Navy– one in cotton, the other in linen. Both are fully lined, and I thought the quality was decent, especially for the price. The fit at Old Navy, as Zee mentioned, can be hit or miss. Try it on if you can!

    3. The quality is what you’d expect – nothing special. But if you want cheap suits for occasions where you need to wear a suit but don’t want to wear a nice/expensive one, that’s the way to go. Or if you’re only going to wear your suit occasionally, so it won’t start to show wear quickly (e.g. if you’re a law student), ON is also a good option.

  2. After months of debate, I finally ordered knee high boots on Monday. I’m so excited! Can’t wait to get them. According to the UPS website they are “out for delivery”. Therefore, this afternoon I am acting like a 16-year-old waiting for her prom date–constantly looking out the window, listening for large truck/squealing breaks noises…. I am annoying myself but I can’t help it. I’m even finding myself get irritated at the SUVs driving by my house (I live in Texas and there are plenty of them) because I keep thinking they are the UPS truck. Sigh. I just had to share. Thanks for listening!

          1. I have a pair of the Ros boots, not the exact same ones, but a knee-high style. They’re almost too wide, so you should be good! I get lots of compliments on mine.

  3. Does anyone have any good tips for how to stop nail biting? I’ve tried keeping polish on them, but as soon as it starts to chip (which happens quickly) I pick it off. I’ve also tried that stuff that you put on there that is supposed to taste bad, but it doesn’t deter me.

    Any tips would be great, since I know it isn’t professional (plus – fingers crossed – I might be getting engaged soon and I want my nails to look nice to show off the ring!)

    Thanks!

    1. keep polish and a nail file at work and a nail file in accessible places such as your purse and car.

      1. I keep a nail file at my desk and in my purse already, but that doesn’t stop me. I do it without thinking!

        1. I have been a nail biter my entire life. I find that I am constantly rubbing my nails, looking for rough edges, and when I find a rough spot, I bite it, which just makes it worse… it’s a vicious cycle, and my nails keep getting shorter and rougher. The ONE thing that has ever gotten me to stop biting them is to wear fake nails. The fake nails smooth out the rough edges, and are very hard so you couldn’t bite them if you wanted to. Your nails will grow underneath. Once mine grow out, I go get a nice manicure and try to keep them smooth for as long as possible.

          I recommend going to a nail salon for the first couple of times, and have them put on the fakes. I always tell them to make the nails as short as possible, which still feels long to me (I get the impression that most of their clientele likes really long nails.

          You can also get some do-it-yourself kits from target or walmart for about $5, which will last about a week. I use those when I’m only having trouble with a nail or two–I put the falsies on the trouble nails, and then paint everything so they match.

          Hope that helps, and good luck! Nail biting is a tough habit!

          1. I was a nail biter for almost 40 years. Seriously. What worked for me was to get a manicure once a week for 6 weeks. My nails were too short to put fakes on, so at first, the technician had little to do except mess with my cuticles. She certainly couldn’t file my nails very much. By the end of the 6 weeks, I could get clear polish on my nails; they still weren’t long enough for colored polish (my nails were very very short in th beginning). Now my nails are of average length and are strong (in part, I think, because I avoided fake nails and having to grow them out or remove them).

    2. The only thing that works for me is paying a lot of money for a manicure :( Besides not wanting to ruin what I just paid for, knowing that someone else will in fact tend to my cuticles and nails in a few days helps me to leave them alone.

      1. Here is what works for me:
        1. Cuticle cream. Sally Hansen has a pretty good one in a blue tube; there’s also some more expensive ones at Sephora that I haven’t tried. Keep one at your desk at work and another one at home, and use at least twice a day – any time find yourself biting or “fixing” your cuticles, put on some cuticle cream instead. This makes your cuticles smooth and so there’s very to pull on and bite off.

        2. Regular nail care. I do my own manicures, and I find that if I left my nails grow a bit long, I start biting them to shorten them. If I take regular care of my nails, keeping them short and nicely polished, I don’t bite them.
        If you start biting your nails the moment the polish starts to chip, how about re-doing the polish every 2-3 days? If you stick with neutral color nail polish, you can do this as the last thing on your way out the door in the morning; if you’re just changing the polish instead of having to file the nails etc, it will take less than 5 minutes and your nails will dry on your commute. If the polish isn’t perfect, no one will notice as long as the color is neutral.

    3. It may not be the best solution, but I started two other habits — playing with tape between my fingers and chewing sugar free gum. Both keep my nails out of my mouth.

    4. How about this: The chances of you getting sick this season (regular flu or the worse variety) triple because you are touching things then putting your hands in your mouth. As a former life-long nail biter, I got a stomach virus when sharing my computer with a intern. I was using the mouse while biting my nails. YUK!

      1. Thanks for the tips… I’ve had fake nails before (both acrylics and UV gels) but they mess up my nails so much, and right now I can’t really afford to get them and to maintain them (all the places in my area are around $80 for a full set and $40 for fills, and my nails actually grow pretty fast – despite me biting them – so I need to get them filled at least every 2 weeks).

        I really like the Burt’s Beese cuticle creme, I have one at my desk, one in my purse, and one on my nightstand.

        Once my cuticles heal up I might try getting manicures, since I can get those for around $10-$12. If I bring my own polish then I can do touch-ups when it starts to chip so that I don’t start to pick and/or bite…

        1. After years of acrylics and wanting to try to grow my own nails, the manicurist recommended a coat of clear nail polish every night – remove on the 7th day and start with a new coat of clear. She recommends a regular clear, not one that is supposed to help them grow – just a regular old top coat.

          I started with a good manicure and followed the advice – worked great for the first month, then I got out of the put a coat on every night habit. If you can stick with it – I think it would work.

  5. I was invited to a holiday party for my new job and I’m looking for a dress to wear. I bought this dress a few weeks ago and was thinking about wearing it…any thoughts? It’s at a nicer restaurant and I’m guessing that it will be people coming straight from work (it starts at 6), but I have no idea since I don’t know any of the women that work in this office yet.

    http://www.anntaylorloft.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId=21719&N=1200007&pCategoryId=3359&categoryId=211&Ns=CATEGORY_SEQ_211&loc=TN&gridSize=sm&showAll=true&defaultColor=Pebble%20Melange%20Grey&defaultSizeType=Regular

    Any help would be much appreciated, thanks!!

    1. That dress is gorgeous.

      If people are coming straight from work, it’s perfect.

      Is there any way that you can contact someone at the new job and ask for a dress code to be sure? That’s always the best solution, imho. It varies so much by region and company.

    2. That is gorgeous! And I know in my little mailer I just got from ATL they have some beautiful jewelry if you want to add a little sparkle without going over the top. But I would also try to call and ask, even if your boss/contact is a man, they’ll put you in touch with a stylish and friendly female (if it’s the type of place you want to stay!)

      1. Also – if you want this, get it fast! It was in my Better Homes and Gardens today…

    3. That is ca-ute! Hope your not in Chicago b/c I think I am ordering this one!

    4. I really like that dress too, but personally think it’s a little too casual for a holiday party (there’s something about the neckline and fabric/texture..), though it may be ok if you’re in a casual part of the country or workplace.

      1. I just rec’d the crepe sheath dress ordered from Talbots.com and it was the most unprofessionally done dress I’ve seen at this price point (listed at $179). The front pleat is unfinished and sticks out above the decorative beading … what designed concluded that I would want threads and seams showing on the front of my dress?!?!?
        http://www1.talbots.com/online/browse/product_details.jsp?id=prdi23542&rootCategory=cat70008&catId=cat80018&sortKey=Default&section=Regular&conceptIdUnderSale=cat70008

        I haven’t seen your potential dress but am not in a good mood with talbots!

  6. I am considering getting a netbook computer. My work laptop is a dinosaur and is just too heavy to shlep to and from work (my back is killing me from a few trips this week). Plus, I think it’d be great for travelling. Anyone have one? Like it? Hate it? I’d love to hear some opinions. Thanks!

    1. luluaj, that’s something of a broad question.
      –What matters to you most: speed, memory, cost? What software do you intend to put on it?
      –Are you tied to a particular operating system?
      –How physically abusive do you think you’ll be to it?
      –What kind of battery life will you need?
      –Will you be out in sunlight or mostly indoors using it?
      –How large or small are your hands (how small can your keyboard be)?

      1. A- Sorry – you’re totally right.

        I’d be getting it for portability and the sake of convenience so I’d like to keep the cost reasonable. I don’t need the best netbook out there. Also no need to install software – I’ll be connecting through my firm’s system remotely. I have small hands so I don’t expect a smaller keyboard will be an issue. Also, I envision toting it around in a protective sleeve in most of my larger purses – so not terribly abusive/rough on it.

        1. you should look into one of the eeepc 1000 models. Friends are very happy and devoted to the eeepcs, and Ive liked them quite a bit when Ive been allowed to use them.

          check out newegg’s selection of the eeepcs (there also a ton of reviews of each model and a full list of specs and pictures). Since large hd is not an issue for you, you can probably get one for around 350. They do come in colors, if that matters to you.

          In terms of security and speed, regardless of what model of netbook you choose, I would suggest getting one with the linux distro installed. It is 1) safer and 2) MS has yet to scale down their kernel to perform better on lighter machines, while the linux distros that go on netbooks are stripped down and optimized for the hardware.

          If you must use the windows os, thats fine, but please, remove the cmd.exe program before you connect to the internet.

          2. Curious – what is the cmd.exe program? Should I remove it from my regular laptop running XP?

          3. @luluaj — thanks, glad I could help. I might be an interloper from the computer world…

            @Karen — cmd.exe is the windows os’ shell/command line interface. You care about it because it can silently (ie without a gui so you dont see it) execute code and start programs. If you arent a programmer who regularly handrolls their own scripts you should get rid of it. Viruses and malware use it.

            Also, if you must use windows, please, please, I beg you on bended knee, don’t use IE.

            Also, everyone who uses the internet should read the following article on user security. http://news.cnet.com/Who-says-safe-computing-must-remain-a-pipe-dream/2010-1071_3-5482340.html

    2. My husband just bought one the new HP netbooks. I LOVE it. The screen is a bit small for doing a lot of work (editing – okay; drafting and comparing documents – not so much). For simply surfing the net and checking email, it works well. Unlike many of the netbooks that I’ve tried, the keyboard is very usable and the keys aren’t much smaller than those on a typical laptop. Also, one model has a built-in broadband card that should work with most cell phone providers. In fact, we just used it on a trip to Florida and had internet service for most of the trip (only limiting factor was cell phone coverage).

    3. I recently bought a Dell Inspiron Mini. I think it is 10″. I tried a number of models at Best Buy and it was the one that I felt most comfortable typing on. It is also very light so I can just toss it in my purse and take it on the bus and make the most of those two otherwise-unbillable hours of my day.

      At $300 it was a great deal (has all the basic MS Office apps and internet, the only two things I cared about) and I like the lightweight but I’m not sure it was really worth it because I hardly use it for two reasons. First, although it makes reading on the bus a little easier, I still feel too cramped to really work, so I often use the time to catch up on the New Yorker. Second, and probably more relevant, the mousepad is horrible. The cursor is always jumping around the screen and closing windows, and then it is very slow in reopening.

      I am glad I have it, but I’m not sure that I would have been so glad if I had spent my own money on it. (My boyfriend purchased it for me so that I would stop taking his laptop around.)

      That’s probably too contradictory to be helpful, but there you go.

      1. I had to replace a dying Sony Vaio this year and got a Toshiba Satellite M505 (it’s this: http://laptops.toshiba.com/laptops/satellite/m500/M505-S4975) from Best Buy. It was more than a netbook costs but has more capability and is very compact – it weighs less than 5 lbs and has a 14-inch screen which means I can usually put it in its sleeve and throw it in a tote and it fits fine. It has some nice features (including something that locks the hard drive if you shake or drop the computer, to prevent damage, which I need because I am a klutz) that I couldn’t get from a netbook but the portability I was looking for (I really got tired of lugging a nearly 8-lb laptop around when I had my Vaio.) I paid about $675. Something to consider.

        1. Hubby just bought a Samsung netbook. He loves it, but personally I can’t stand the small screen. The bought it at best buy–their two cheapest laptops were his Samsung and a Gateway model. Some friends have the same model Gateway and it has been nothing but trouble for them, but the Samsung has been just fine. Even if you’re ordering online, I recommend going to a store to get the feel of the computer, b/c some of them were really almost too small to type on. Also, if you want Windows, don’t get hung up on getting the latest and greatest OS–the netbooks that run XP are faster than the ones that run Vista. Not sure how 7 will measure up.

  7. This is a bit of an odd one. Now that it is colder, I am wearing a hat to court. Obviously, I take it off. But, where do you put yours? It is not a knit hat because static cling I do not need. How do I look graceful while trying to manage a hate, a coat and all my files? Okay, graceful might be pushing it with me. I would settle for less like a klutz.

    2. If there is a coat room at the courthouse, that is the obvious choice. Walk in, go to coat room, take off coat and hat there. If no coat room, what do you usually do with your coat? Do you hang it on the back of your chair? Do you fold it up?

      First thing: set down your files. This frees your hands to gracefully do everything else. Remove your gloves. Then remove your scarf. Take the hat off, and place it on your table/desk next to your files. Then remove the coat. Whatever you usually do with your winter coat, do that, hang on chair, etc. If you have to fold the coat and put it on a flat surface, do that, then put the (already removed) hat on top of the coat.

      I think the real key here is having plenty to time to do all this gracefully so it doesn’t look like you are awkward with your hat or rushing around drawing attention to yourself. Sounds silly, but practice a few times at home. You want the whole process to look smooth and professional.

      I used to walk to work in California, where very few people in my office walked. I wore structured winter hats, sort of Russian looking affairs. Many, many women complimented me on the hats. A very familiar refrain is, “Oh, I could never pull off wearing a hat!” Confidence really is the key, as people WILL look at you.

      Good luck!

  8. I recently lost about 40 pounds and now none of my work clothes fit me (no, I’m not complaining). First, what, if anything, I can have tailored to fit my new body? I have several expensive suits that I hate to get rid of (and truthfully, I don’t feel like spending as much on new suits as I did the first go around, especially given the economy). Does anyone have any suggestions as to whether it would be worth it to have these suits tailored? Second, I need to replenish my wardrobe ASAP and I’m looking for suggestions for good quality basic pieces that are not uber-expensive as I am essentially starting from scratch. I am a senior associate at a medium sized law firm in Chicago where the dress code is conservative business casual. I typically wear suits only for client meetings.

    1. The second sentence should read, “What, if anything, can I have tailored to fit my new body?” It’s definitely Friday!

      1. First of all, congratulations! I’m in a similar situation, but actually wear suits most of the time. I went ahead and bit the bullet and spent several hundred $ on several pieces that I can mix and match (think black and white basics with accessories/ sweater sets/ etc. in colors to make it more interesting). I actually had a lot of luck with Talbots. I was also fortunate to be able to pull some things from the back of my closest to round things out. The good news is that it seems like there are a lot of sales going on right now, so try to combine those. On an earlier thread on this blog- someone posted a combo for Brooks Brothers where she got a lot of things for $80. Again, congratulations and good luck!

      2. Congratulations!

        I lost some weight (less than you — abt 20 lbs) a couple of years ago. My tailor was able to take in my pants and they looked pretty good, but not my jackets. I think it depends on your tailor. My jackets were all pretty structured, and she would have had to take apart the whole thing and reconstruct it. She wasn’t willing to do that, but maybe some are. It’ll cost, though.

        1. Agreed–skirts and pants are doable, but jackets are not. 40lbs is a lot more than I lost (about 25) so your old pants might even be too big to have altered.

          I’m a big believer in rewarding yourself for meeting weight loss goals… maybe you can’t afford to replace all the nice old suits w/ similar quality right away, but you should definitely get yourself one or two kick-ass new suits to celebrate your achievement and show it off a little more!

    2. You may be able to alter the skirts, but I think everything else is going to be too difficult. I don’t know how tall you are, but my friend who lost that amount of weight was fairly petite and ended up going from a size 14 to a size 4. Even with a size 12 to a size 6, I think would require taking the jackets apart and possibly even the pants because the legs will probably be too wide to look good.

      I like Classiques Entier suits at Nordstrom. When I went to my store a few weeks ago, it seems like there were both trendy and classic pieces, but they were in slightly different areas of the store.

    3. I’m also in the same boat and have no advice on the tailoring part of it (I have a bagful of stuff I need to take to the tailor), but as for getting new pieces, I highly recommend your local outlet mall. I went to the Banana Republic outlet last weekend, and with my 30% off coupon, picked up a three-piece suit (jacket, pants, and skirt), a sheath dress, a tweed blazer, and two tops for just under $300. All of it coordinates with the few things I already had in my closet that still fit, so I’ve effectively just doubled my work wardrobe without paying too much.

      Keep in mind, though, that I am still in the process of losing weight, so these are more likely to be transitional pieces for me, and if you’re at your goal you will probably want to spend a bit more. Still, the outlets are a great place to start!

      1. The rule of thumb I’ve read is don’t bother trying to have something tailored if you’ve gone down more than 2 sizes.

    4. Congratulations!!
      I was in the same situation earlier this year (lost 50 lbs: my “50 before 50” goal). Skirts were do-able from a tailoring standpoint, pants if only a size or so, jackets, not so much.
      For replacement pieces, what I did:
      Hit the sale rack at Dillards/Macy’s/Nordstrom Rack for Anne Klein and Tahari suits. In Dallas we have several great resale stores where I was able to pick up some great pieces (including 2 St John jackets) for less than $150 each. For the business casual pieces I did mainly Nordstrom Rack and Talbotts (clearance). I did spring for one drop dead gorgeous dress to wear to my 30th HS reunion in August.

  9. Just an aside – to those who read silently all the great advice about skincare last week: if you have sensitive skin please save your face the pain and get the Sensitive Skin St. Ives Apricot Scrub! I got the regular (on sale AND had an extra 25%) and I feel like a walking version of the “does your face hurt? because it’s killing me!” joke, even without scrubbing hard. Happy Friday all :)

    1. I gave up on St Ives after college. It is really rough on the skin! I have really sensitive skin (redhead) and the Murad Exfoliating Wash for sensitive skin works great for me, no issues at all.

      1. I have an aesthetician friend who told me that St. Ives is the absolute worst for your skin (the regular kind, not sure about the sensitive) because the particles in the scrub are way too large and can actually damage the skin.

        1. I’ve heard the same thing about St. Ives (regular variety). I’ve seen a few estheticians in recent years and all have recommended exfoliating with a less harsh scrub no more than once or twice a week. More often and you can traumatize/damage the skin. I have normal skin (in terms of dry/oily) and using the regular St. Ives once a week makes my face feel really raw!

          1. I was trained as an esthetician a few years ago (although never worked in the field, used my license for makeup artistry before going back to school to be an accountant) and very much agree that St. Ives is a poor choice for your skin.

            I swear by Dermalogica Daily Microfoliant. I am 29 and this calms my breakouts and smooths my skin’s tone and texture. It is expensive ($50)but one bottle has lasted me a year. I put it on my Christmas wish list :)

            http://www.amazon.com/Dermalogica-Daily-Microfoliant-2-6-oz/dp/B0006B446E

            Important note: avoid over-exfoliation. If you exfoliate every day your skin will “forget” how to do it naturally. Better to exfoliate three times a week.

            Easy and cheap trick: Put a teaspoon of table sugar in your cleanser. The sugar provides a gentle scrub and is a natural humectant which helps your skin retain moisture.

            Also, if you can afford to get facials once or twice a month, , find a spa that has Eminence products, and get the AHA and Paprika exfoliation treatment. (Do not use this treatment if you have rosacea) It is amazing and will change your skin for the better.

            http://www.eminenceorganics.com/

    1. i’m not a seasoned attorney, but in my first year at biglaw, i’ve had to write a 10+ page memo only twice. a memo of 2+ pages… maybe once a month. i don’t know if you find that reassuring.

      1. “Memos” are often really long, particularly if you’re working in a complex area. When I was coming up the ranks I often wrote ones that were 35-50 pages (we had weird spacing/outline styles, though, so that’s not as impressive as it sounds).

    2. Perhaps you could clarify what kind of reassurance you want. Are you afraid you’re making simple issues too complicated?

      I haven’t had occasion to write memos very often, but when I do they are often that long or longer. If you are writing a memo, it is often because the law and/or application of law to the facts in question is unsettled. That means you should be coming up with analogous situations, summarizing legislative history, and/or delving deeply into the facts of apparently conflicting cases to try to come up with a unifying principle behind them. These things bulk up a memo fast.

      If you’re being asked to summarize the elements on a basic question of law so that a more senior attorney can intelligently discuss it, that should only take a page or two. If you’re not sure which of these situations you’re in, clarify with the assigning attorney before you write a lot.

    3. I am headed toward seasoned, and at this point, the only time I write anything close to that long, is if I’ve advised my counsel against doing something, and they opt to do it anyway, then I’ll do a memo to the file detailing all my concerns, and possible solutions, because when something goes wrong, I’ve CYA’d and have on hand some immediate options…..

    4. In this economy, I’m not sure what Company would be willing to pay $50,000 for a 50-page memo. As in-house counsel, I never commissioned one, nor would I. If an issue is “complex” and unsettled legally, I’d ask outside counsel to summarize it succinctly and give me the key cases and statutes so I could read them myself. Factual complexity is something that a smart, experience lawyer knows will probably lead to denial of a motion for summary judgment… Hearing about 50+ page memos reminds me of why I find BIGLAW so archaic and distasteful.

      1. Maybe, but we do $50k opinions all the time, which are really just memos with the Firm’s guarantee (of sorts) behind it, and even with this economy some companies still need or want these.

      3. Agreed. A $50K memo better be “bet the company” litigation….and requested by the GC or CEO specifically.

        1. Agreed, divalicscious11. Good point. When I was in-house, we sometimes spent $100K+ on patent opinions (non-infringement mostly, with some invalidity work) if there was significant potential liability. I don’t really consider those “memos” in the traditional litigation sense of “synthesize cases and statues and apply them to the facts.” I can deal with the former, but have no patience for the latter..

    5. If I recall correctly, Mrs. Frankwiler is still a law student, right? In the summer after 1L and 2L I spent approximately 80% of my time writing memos between 2 and 15 pages. Unlike in school, the goal was usually to get to the right point more quickly, so 2 would be preferable to 3 pages, etc. When the only thing that matters is getting the right answer, and there is a real case it is much easier than the competitive style of law school writing classes. I hated my class, and loved my job. Things that made it better: I could ask questions about the facts based on what I found of the partner or the client, rather than relying on the “closed case”; I could follow up on tangents that might be relevant in a footnote or addendum to the memo, without worry of wasting my “page limit”, if the answer was upfront and direct, I could just give it, in one page without analyzing a case on each side, etc. Also, real clients, with real cases, are not usually as “balanced” on the fence of an issue, or as obscure or complex an issue as your writing assignment is. Just because you hate legal writing class, doesn’t mean you’ll hate real world legal writing!

    6. Humm, I’ve been practicing for 7 years…guess that makes me a bit seasoned. Monthly, I’ll write a 2-3 two to five paged memo’s. They may be summarizing issues for another attorney in my office regarding a particular legal issue which is intended to be transmitted to the client or a memo to file summarizing the issues and concerns regarding a particular case. Sometimes, it may be summarizing an alternate analysis and cases regarding a particular motion or reply I’m working on.

      I think in the past year, the longest memo I’ve drafted is 15 pages, and that was a very extensive analysis of fairly complex issues under federal and state transportation laws and regulations. The shortest has been just over a page – and that’s Ariel font size 12 with a size 16 heading for “Memorandum” in the template that I use.

    7. Hey Mrs BEF, I’m a third year association (sorry, not seasoned yet) and I’ve never had to write a memo.

    8. I write maybe 3 a year, mostly to people senior to me explaining some issue to them, and they’re usually under 10 pages. But I bet litigation attorneys write a lot more.

      1. I write memos all the time. Just finished a 15 page (single spaced) memo this weekend. I’m in a regulatory practice, so I probably spend at least 50% of my time (if not more) writing memos. So I think it all depends on what type of law you practice.

  11. What are people wearing to holiday work-related parties this year? Compared to a few years ago the party season for me this year is pretty slow, but I still do have a few functions coming up. Dresses? Skirt suits?

    2. I’m toying between a white with black abstract floral pattern dress I have sitting in the closet that I haven’t worn in a couple years paired with a bright color cardigan (i.e. red or green) or pairing a cardigan with a black skirt. I had been looking at several dresses at Nordstrom, but I’m cheaping out.

      Here’s the cardigan I’m thinking of pairing with a skirt
      http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=423489&CategoryID=4097
      but, in the red. Thoughts?

      1. I really like that. I am a big fan of anything black and white because those pieces end up being really versatile, for me.

        I have a couple of dress options but for a couple of functions I think a dress and jacket or something more business-y might be more appropriate.

  12. I’m on the hunt for a nice one shouldered knee length dress in a not shiny fabric. silk would be nice. Preferably a jewel tone like colbalt blue or emerald green. When I wear black, everyone asks me if I’m feeling unwell…

    1. As you have something specific in mind would it not be easier to have someone make something for you?

      1. Wouldn’t that be a lot more expensive? Though I’ve never had anything made for me before so I guess I was just assuming it’d be a lot more..

        1. I suppose it depends what price point you’re buying at.

          I’m in the UK, so that might make a difference too.

          1. @Gem
            While I like the idea, I dont know where in SF I’d be able to find someone to do so. ‘tailor’ always seems to mean ‘alterations’ not ‘make from scratch’ . I’d like green because I already have pink, blue, & purple party dresses (all of which have too much cleavage for the office party)

  13. I’ve been finding more and more gray hairs lately. I’m only 27! Trying to decide whether to start dying or wait a little longer. There are probably 10-15 grays, and my hair is medium brown. Pixie cut. I don’t think they’re super noticable yet.

    For something completely different, tryouts for the moot court travelling team stat today, and I’m a bundle of nerves!!

    1. I hear you! I’m 30 years old and in the same boat with the gray hairs. I don’t have a lot but they’re all in the front of my hair, so they’re noticeable. I’ve been dying my hair for the last few years with Naturtint from Whole Foods, which doesn’t have any ammonia and is billed as being more “natural” and less harsh on hair. I find that it lasts me about a month. Good luck, you’re definitely not alone.

      1. I am also going grey in my late 20’s , but I am actually happy about it. I see it as a way to look more “seasoned” and counteract the effects of my otherwise baby-faced looks. Of course, I’m lucky that my greys are a really nice bright white color, and not a dirty yellow or something, and they are coming in in the front, along my part, almost like highlights in my otherwise brown hair. I’ve always thought that grey hair (esp all grey hair) on otherwise young-looking women is a cool, bold, even ballsy look. Plus, once you start dyeing, you can’t stop w/o going through the horrible process of growing out those roots.

        1. I totally agree, anonymous. I’m now in the early 50s, never dyed my hair, and impatient for the nice white/silver greys to finish filling in – about 50% of the way. When first in business, trust and confidence were an issue, appearing very young…until I started speaking. The greys have certainly helped over the years. I also am loathe to try chemical dyes and the upkeep as well as the costs. Research is questionable on dyes for the long term health impacts as well.

    2. Try a rinse. I think I got my first grays around age 18…. I use a rinse that washes out after about 8 washes (I am a woman of color with natural hair so I only wash it once a week). I have two shades, one of my natural color, and one a little lighter, which looks a bit like highlights when I use it, mixing the two sometimes for a subtler look. I started using this when I still relaxed my hair because its mild enough to use on the same day as a relaxer. Still use it now, just have to eave it on a little longer than when my hair was processed.

    3. Consider highlights. They’re a good way to disguise the gray, and it doesn’t sound like you have a lot of gray yet. I was able to get away w/ only highlights for a long time when my hair first started turning.

      1. Yep. I got away with only highlights for several years. Now I have to do a semi-perm. “gloss” in addition to the highlights, but highlights kept me “covered” until I was about 20-30% gray.

  14. Ladies: I have recently begun adoring the look of a two strand pearl necklace that hits around the clavicle line. I think it looks fabulous under button downs and with dresses/shirts of almost any neckline. I’ve been trolling various department store websites and what not and am not finding what I’m looking for. Now I’m wondering if, when I’ve seen the look, it is really a doubled up long necklace. I know I should take the time to just go and try on a bunch of necklaces to find the right lengths but, if anyone already rocks this look and can advise, I’d appreciate it.

    1. My neck (shirt collar) is 13 inches. I often double up a 30 inch necklace to look like a 2-strand choker.

      It’s unbelievably easy to string your own beads from a craft store, too. I make chokers using elastic stringing cord (which eliminates the need for a clasp and the associated hardware/tools). You could combine two chokers of your own design for the same effect.

    2. I’d try Brooks Brothers — they have some great jewelry and the prices aren’t terrible once things are marked down. (After a couple of rounds of mark downs, their jewelry is often really well-priced.) How about this one:
      http://www.brooksbrothers.com/IWCatProductPage.process?Merchant_Id=1&Section_Id=496&Product_Id=1433990&Parent_Id=1034&default_color=AS-SHOWN&sort_by=&sectioncolor=&sectionsize=
      I have it in grey and love it. I think I paid about $80 or so for it.

      1. Thanks! The necklace is lovely. I’ll keep a watch out for BB jewelry sales — good tip!

    4. I do this all the time but with three strands – not two. I inherited an extraordinarily long string of pearls from a great grandmother. I triple them up to wear at my clavicle and double them up to give plain sweaters interest, but I get the most compliments when I wear them long and tie them in a careful knot about 2/3 of the way down. IMO a long strand (either heirloom or department store) is much more versatile than having any particular length. I know me, and I’m not going to take the time in the morning to debate which pearl necklace to get out and put on!

  15. A question for the weight loss folks and the skin care folks:

    I’ve recently lost about 3o pounds, and I’m about 30 years old. I love what losing weight has done to my body, but hate what it’s done to my face. Apparently, the fat was keeping my face perky–now that it’s gone, I look deflated, droopy, and sort of tired (which is the opposite of how I feel).

    Do any of you weight loss folks know if this is temporary–will my face tighten back up? Do any of you skin care folks have suggestions on products I can use to help?

    1. It may be that you have some loose skin left over and it will tighten up in time. Are you exercising and exfoliating regularly (3x/week as per above post)? If so time may be the solution. Not sure on what products to use though, but you could go to sephora and ask them, or get a derm referral.

    2. Have you lost the weight through exercise or just dieting? Definitely start exercising if you haven’t already. Otherwise try Botox or one of those anti-wrinkle creams.

      1. I definitely have loose skin–wrinkles aren’t a problem for me yet. I lost the weight relatively quickly, through exercise, and I continue to exercise. I will go check out Sephora. I’m worried that my face won’t tighten back up on it’s own b/c I’m not as young as I used to be!

        1. Anonymous, I feel your pain. I’m mid-30s and took off 75 lbs this year through diet and exercise. I too, feel like I’m more wrinkly (all over!) but more troubling is that I feel like my face makes me look 10 years older! I’ll be keeping my eye out for suggestions, too!

    3. My ex lost over 100 pounds, and ended up having a “full-body lift”, to remove all the loose skin. It was very pricey, but he wasn’t happy until he had the surgery. I am always surprised the weight loss features in magazines or on TV never point out this side-effect of losing weight. I see pictures of the “Biggest lose” winners and know they must be photoshopped because there is no way to lose that much that fast and have tight skin after.

  16. I am a deferred associate whose start date just got moved up. Obviously, I’m thrilled, but since I was originally slated to start in early 2010, I feel a little bit unprepared. The firm is business casual, and when I was a summer associate, it was easy to just throw on a dress or a skirt and blouse. I’m curious to see what kind of outfits everyone wears on a regular basis at their business casual firms in the winter.

    A few specific questions: Are sweaters appropriate to wear as a top, with no other button down, etc. under it? Are nicer khaki pants ok to wear as bottoms? I have trouble finding nice shirts to wear that don’t look too casual and aren’t button down (I have the gaping problem that I’ve seen discussed here before). I have had some luck with short sleeved button downs that are fitted at the waist, but they can’t be tucked in–are these ok to wear?

    Thanks in advance for any advice!

    1. I highly recommend a book called “Casual Power” for getting a sense of what “casual” means and what makes a casual outfit look professional.

      It’s hard to give specific advice about what’s acceptable because every workplace is different, and it also depends how ambitious you are. If your goal is to work for a few years, pay off some loans and not stick out like a sore thumb, that’s one thing; if you want to come across as uberprofessional and early partner material, that’s another. It’s very unlikely that you will be openly criticized for what you wear, but what you wear does affect how people perceive you.

      Casual Power recommends wearing two pieces on top – a sweater with a jacket, etc. I try to wear wool-blend pants on the bottom and either a twin set or a jacket (often in a contrasting color or a fun material rather than matching the bottoms) most days. I personally wouldn’t wear the typical light-colored khaki except on a summer Friday, but would wear dark pants in a similar fabric occasionally. There’s nothing wrong with wearing a sweater by itself on top, but adding something – a jacket, or perhaps a scarf and/or interesting necklace – will make you look more put together.

      The important thing is to come across as polished, even though you’re not wearing a suit. So your clothes should fit and be in good condition. Also important, in my opinion, to use feminine details in moderation so you don’t come across as young and girly.

    2. I think that all sounds fine — maybe a tad casual, but I dress pretty casual myself and get away with it. I wouldn’t do khaki pants, though. But yes, sweaters on top are fine, as are untucked fitted shirts, as long as they don’t look like they should be tucked (i.e. much longer on front/back than sides).

      Btw if you have button-downs that you can’t wear because of gaping, instead of giving up on them entirely, have you tried wearing a flatter bra, maybe even something like a sports bra? I discovered that my button-downs fit much better when I wear a bra that is not padded or push-up, but for some reason it took me awhile to come to terms with this and be willing to look like I have a smaller chest in order to wear these shirts more comfortably — but now I don’t mind at all.

      1. You can also invest in button downs that are sized by bra size, not the regular 2/4/6/etc.

    3. A note about pants – even if they are in a very nice fabric, avoid pants that have typical “jeans” pockets or flaps in the back. It makes an otherwise perfectly appropriate pair of pants look much more casual. I notice a fair number of younger associates wearing these styles and they do not seem to realize that these pockets make their outfit come across as casual and not work-appropriate.

  18. After two winters of living in New York without good snow boots, I’ve decided it’s time to finally break down and buy a pair. Does anyone have suggestions for a good pair of warm yet water proof (or at least water resistant) winter boots? (Other than uggs, which I think may be the ugliest shoes ever invented)

    1. La Canadienne boots – Nordstrom and Zappos both carry them. Warm, waterproof, and generally much better looking than wellies or uggs.

    2. Plus, Uggs are not waterproof.

      It depends on what you’re looking for. Are you looking for the burliest possible boots, to be slogged through terrible weather, and then immediately changed out of when you arrive at work? If so, I would look at Sorels, which are very tough and have some cute features. If you’re looking for something middle of the road, some of the other brands (Merrel, Northface are two that I can think of) have some nice water resistant/waterproof styles that are a little more stylish. Finally, I’m lusting after a pair of Cole Haan leather boots that are relatively sturdy but don’t in anyway qualify as heavy-weather gear.

    3. KZ, I agree that Uggs are not the cutest. Really, what is the use if they are not even waterproof. I ordered these boots last winter, and they are absolutely great. They are waterproof, and kept my feet warm and dry through the slushy Northeastern snow. It was bliss to put them back on to make my way home from school (I always change into heels. I personally get upset when ladies wear their “outside” shoes inside). I must say that these were really the first “good,” non-fashion boots that I’ve ever purchased. I was one of those who thought that she could make it through the winter with a pair of sneakers. Slush in your socks is not cute (or comfortable).
      http://www.zappos.com/hi-tec-womens-st-moritz-cream-brown#additional-reviews

      1. Uggs are not winter boots!!!
        I don’t know why people think “snow boots” would come from Australia…. They’re made for after-surfing, not NYC winters.

    5. If you are looking for real inclement weather boots, I ordered plain black Kamik Boots on Zappos and have been very pleased with them. They look more like rain boots than snow boots, however they are lined with polartec fleece. I have worn them through 2 Chicago winters (and I walk or take transit to work) and they have certainly served their purpose. Because they are plain black, I think they look more adult than some of the other boots out there. They are also wide enough that I can fit my pants in them on those awful weather days, and I typically have problems finding boots that accommodate my calves. I have seen these boots on Zappos this season as well.

  19. If anyone is shopping for jeans, amazon has a $20 off order/free shipping/free return deal going on. Looks like no code is needed. They have the joe’s jeans folks were talking about a little while ago

    1. Yeah, this is a great offer. I think I may try out a pair or two that I’ve been wanting but haven’t been able to try on in store and I don’t want to have to pay for return shipping if they don’t fit.

    1. The dress is pretty, but it seems really summery to me. That makes it look rather casual for a holiday party. Are you someplace with warm weather this time of year?

    2. Looks too summery for DC in both color and weight. Try a deeper color etc.. for festive, yet seasonally appropriate and a slightly heavier weight, maybe a jersey knit.

      1. Thanks all for the feedback. I’m probably going to wear a black dress or a dark purple dress in a jersey knit.

        1. Good choice. You can always dress up a solid color dark dress with sparkly jewelry or scarves. Rhinestones are holiday-appropriate and inexpensive.

  21. Has anyone tried the Reebok Easytones or Skechers Shape-ups? I’m thinking of getting a pair, but I’m not sure which brand to choose (or whether they’re worth the hype).

    1. I’ve heard that nurses who stand all day love the Reebok ones and they apparently do make some difference. I think they were the originals and are supposed to be better. Never tried them myself though.

    2. I have the MBT Mary Janes, and I use them for days I am taking the train to work. they aren’t particularly cute but they are comfortable for walking…. the do make you engage your core so that has to help, but they won’t replace a workout…

  22. I just confirmed that I am pregnant (9 weeks) with multiples (eek!). I am still very young in my career, and my husband is still in his residency.

    I was wondering at which point should I alert my boss, and how. I intend on going back ot the office after maternity leave. My other question is does anyone know where to get some professional maternity wear. I work with an investment firm, and am the only professional female on my floor, and typically wear a suit to work, or a dress with a jacket.

    1. Assuming that your firm does not have any layoffs on the horizon, I would tell your boss at 12 weeks or when your pregnancy starts to impact your work (I told mine at 10 weeks because I threw up ALL the time.) If you wait longer you run the risk of (1) your boss figuring it out before you tell him – which is seriously not good and (2) your boss being annoyed you did not say anything sooner. As to how – tell him/her in person and in private. Tell him/her when you expect to go out on maternity leave (check with your doctor – working up to the day before probably not possible with multiples) and how long you expect to take off.

      Clothes – don’t spend more than you have too. Professional maternity clothes are expensive, poorly made or both. Also with multiples you will outgrow the “cute” maternity stuff fast. Focus on a few pairs of black pants and knee length maternity dresses. If you have larger jackets you can wear them over a plain maternity dress almost to the end. A plain black dress and a non-maternity jacket will take you through the awkward “is she or isn’t she” period.

      Good luck and congratulations!

      1. Alli-
        Thank you so much. Unfortunately, I work at a big firm, with plenty of lay offs. I think the only reason I haven’t been laid off is since I am the only woman. So I’m worried about the impact of the announcement. According to my physician, I should plan to spend the third trimester away from work.

        By the way, how did the transition back to work go?

        1. Telling your boss sooner may actually help insulate you from layoffs, from a cynical perspective. They’ll be wary of laying someone off who could claim discrimination.

          At least where I work, it’s generally a good practice to give two months’ notice. If you’re going to need to be on leave for the third trimester, I think you should tell your boss by the 4th month, or whenever you start showing or the pregnancy begins to impact your life.

        2. Oh, and try the Bella Band to make some of your clothes last longer, especially since you’ll probably be going on leave before you’re very big. And the Liz Lange (I think that’s what it’s called) maternity collection at Target is decent and affordable.

        3. The transition back to work was not bad. It is important to line up good, reliable child care in advance! I signed up when I was 10 weeks pregnant, took 4 months of maternity leave and my spot became available the week before I went back to work. Having said that, I left that job within the first year for a job at a smaller firm with lower billables and less travel.

          Layoffs make it hard – one the one hand pregnancy makes you less desirable as an employee to some (although if you are planning on taking a bunch of time off without pay they might like that) on the other hand the fear of pregnancy discrimination might give them pause. On the whole the issue is largely academic. With multiples your pregnancy will become obvious more quickly and not telling will really make them mad.

    2. I was still at BigLaw when I had my youngest. I told my Partner, then the managing partner at 12 weeks, which is when the risk of miscarrying decreases significantly. I also told a very senior associate that I worked with a lot.
      I started working up my leave plan and kept a running “transition memo” from about 6 months on “just in case”. With multiples, you may want to do this from about 4 months as the possibility of bed rest etc.. is higher. You may also want to organize your stuff so your admin/paralegal can find things if you need him/her to. If you go in with a plan, it will make your experience much smoother in my opinion…

      Don’t spend a lot of money on maternity clothes. they are to costly, and you tend not to get your wear out of them. I bought one nice wool 4 piece suit (jacket/dress/skirt/pant) and a few dresses. I wanted to burn them after I delivered, but that is all you need for a limited term. g

    3. First, congrats! I have 22 month old twins, so I have been there, done that, so to speak.

      On when to alert your boss, I think you are fine with waiting until after the first trimester, but particularly with multiples you are going to start to show soon. I told my immediate boss and a couple close coworkers at around 4-6 weeks, but I had done IVF and felt I needed to explain all the absences so he didn’t think I was dying/looking for another job. I also have a very good relationship with him. I told the managing partner (at the time I was at a 27-person firm) around 12 1/2 weeks. I scheduled a meeting with him to tell him and to discuss, and his reaction was very positive. After I told him, I told others in the office one on one. Personally, I thought a firmwide email announcing my pregnancy seemed unprofessional. I also thought some partners would prefer to hear through the grapevine rather than have a conversation about it. I would just use your discretion. Throughout these conversations, I would make clear that you intend to come back to work and just maintain a positive, upbeat demeanor about it.

      On maternity wear, I highly recommend dresses. They are easy, professional, and forgiving. Particularly with multiples, you are going to find that the shirts get too short at the end. Dresses tend to work longer. Target has some really cute and professional dresses and tops, at a good price point. I also abandoned the suit/jacket unless I really needed it for court, and I found people to be understanding. If you absolutely must have jackets, A Pea in the Pod has good, professional suits, but it is expensive. Ann Taylor Loft also started selling maternity wear near the end of my pregnancy, so I haven’t vetted the quality of it.

      1. Also wanted to add that I worked until 35 weeks (delivered at 37 1/2), and I went back at 8 weeks. It’s completely doable, even with twins.

        1. Thank goodness!!! I’m glad to hear going back within 8 weeks is totally doable.

          I intend on being completely positive to my coworkers and other personal throughout this, and be reachable by phone and email.

  23. I just confirmed that I am pregnant (9 weeks) with multiples (eek!). I am still very young in my career, and my husband is still in his residency.

    I was wondering at which point should I alert my boss, and how. I intend on going back to the office after maternity leave. Is it possible to go back to the office after having multiples? Also does anyone know where I can get some great maternity wear?.= I work with an investment firm, and am the only professional female on my floor, and typically wear a suit to work, or a dress with a jacket.

    1. maternity wear: both Gap and Ann Taylor Loft have maternity lines that aren’t too expensive, are decently made, and usually work appropriate. You can probably get away with wearing a lot of your current jackets unbuttoned for a long time, so focus on bottoms and tops to go underneath. and don’t worry about wearing the same things over and over – everyone just focuses on your belly after a while. Maternity dresses were the easiest thing for me, b/c they expand easily as you grow.

      1. Meg-

        Thank you. I will be checking out both those lines in the coming months.

        1. Mommy to Be – Congratulations! As a working mom to four, I offer the following advice:
          1. Telling the boss – I agree with the others that you should start the discussion around 12 weeks or so (maybe sooner because you might be showing sooner with multiples). Also, it might be smart to have a transition plan worked out ahead of time to reassure your boss that: (a) it’s under control; (b) you have a plan so things will be okay when you’re away; and (c) you are coming back. I would emphasize the last point.
          2. What to Wear – I bought 2 skirts/1 pant/blazers (one brown, one black) from Motherhood and rotated them with blouses. I also picked some some good side-button pants (JC Penney I think) that work well for the “fourth trimester.”

        2. Congrats! I echo the above re: telling at 12 weeks if you can get away with it for that long.

          On a sober note – if you receive any feedback from your bosses before you tell them and then after re: your job performance, be sure to document it. I was laid off when 8 months pregnant and got a good settlement from the company bc they fired me for a pretextual reason – eg all my reviews before I was pregnant were positive, then the only review I got after I had disclosed my pregnancy was a layoff review. So I got paid thru maternity leave and an additional 3 months of pay. I did use a lawyer to get that settlement.

          On maternity clothes – I got 2 maternity suits (black and gray) from pea in the pod. Pretty good quality although polyester blend. I had “fat” suits from my previous postpartum period, so I wore those for a few months until they got too small. I got most of my other clothes at Gap and Old Navy. Gap shirts are great for the 2nd and 3rd tri because they are longer – Old Navy are a bit shorter and wider. I am tall anyway (5.8) so the Gap ones generally fit better. Also got several Gap dresses and wore them under the jackets, and one pea in the pod dress in a plaid suiting fabric that was v businessy and nice. Watch for sales too, esp with the gap stuff – you can generally get things for much less. Some people have had luck with craigslist and ebay, but I didn’t like the stuff that was available there.

  24. Firstly , congratulations! Speak to your boss around 12 weeks (you will probably start showing at this point with multiples – I was almost 20 wks along before I had any bump, but spoke to boss at 16 weeks for the same reasons outlined by previous posters). Good to have a plan for how you intend to handle the rest of your maternity (backup for days that you are unwell, etc), ensure smooth transition when you go on leave & return. Dates / timelines would help (just so he gets the feeling you’re being very professional about it).

    Clothes – don’t spend a fortune on “maternity clothes”. Many times, high street retailers have loads of tops in soft, drapey jersey that you can buy cheaply and wear over skirts/ pants (I bought 3 pairs of black pants – 2 dress ones for work, & 1 pair capris that lasted me 9 mths). What I would suggest is that you stick to 1 color palette/ family of colors, as far as you can.

    With multiples, you may feel tired more often, need to go on leave earlier & have issues starting work as planned (you’ll be exhausted and I think the US has just 2 mths leave?). Think about it and consult with other folks who have multiples. I was lucky enough to take (and get) 9 mths unpaid leave since I wanted to spend time with my son but I work for a corporate that rotates assignments every 3-4 yrs and I was coming to the end of mine anyway. Hope this helps!

  25. ooh, also remembered the worst part (clothes-wise) is the 2nd trimester where “maternity” bottoms are way too loose and normal ones don’t fit. I got pants that have adjustable buttons on the sides that I could let out as time went by (and at their tightest, fit me pre & post preg).

    Enjoy pregnancy – certainly gives a different perspective on life:)

  26. Old Navy seems to have decent maternity clothing…

    Enjoy… I SO look forward to being pregnant!

  27. Mommy to be — congratulations!!!

    When you say multiples, how many babies are you talking about? Twins are pretty common. There are several women in my office with twins, and several friends. You may want to take a slightly longer maternity leave since the first 6 or so months are rough with two needy babies … but beyond that, your impacts aren’t that huge. But if it’s higher-order multiples (trips, quads, etc) then that’s a different story. I’m guessing you’re talking triplets or more given the reference to being home for the third trimester? It’ll be a harder pregnancy on you physically, so you should let your office know sooner. And I would suggest not making too many plans for maternity leave, since you’re not sure when you’ll deliver. You may want more time if they’re preemies or micro-preemies, for example. Leave things as open-ended as you can, so you’ve got flexibility for later.

    FWIW, I have three kids. Took 5 months with #1 (biological), 6 weeks with #2 (adopted less than a year after #1 was born) and 9 months with #3 (biological). My firm was very, very supportive of maternity leave. First, I had two separate leaves in a year. Them I took the long leave with my youngest, and worked from home for the last 3-4 months of it. The hard part came in the return, when I was basically expected to jump right in as if nothing changed.

    On the timing issue: I would wait out the first trimester unless you’re comfortable discussing miscarriage, too. Been there, done that. :-( Maybe let a good friend know so she can alert you to rumors. Most of the secretaries were gossiping about my being pregnant well before I announced, though my partner was clueless.

    Most of my maternity stuff came from Gap or Old Navy — though Ann Taylor has now started a maternity line, too. Am guessing that with multiples, you’ll need maternity clothes much sooner if you’re not already in them. Also, take a look on Craigslist and EBay; there is a huge amount of maternity clothing re-sale going on, since it’s only worn for a handful of months. You should be able to wear your jackets for some time, albeit not buttoned up. Dress + jacket will probably be a much easier look than a suit.

    Last piece of advice: find a mom’s group, like Moms of Multiples or the like. Great advice & support, plus lots of gear trading. :-)

    1. I am pregnant with triplets.

      That’s a great idea about mom’s groups. Thank you for all the wonderful advice. :)

  28. I’m sure this topic has been covered already, but can you ladies recommend some good, black, opaque tights? These would be to wear with suits or separates for business, with high heels. I would love to know what your favorites are. Thanks.

    1. I like Gap black tights – they come in tall which I always need, and are decently opaque.

      1. But are the Gap tights dressy or just typical black tights? I have several pairs of opaque black tights that are great for a casual look with tall boots, but I’m looking for something more appropriate to wear with skirt suits in a formal business setting. I guess I am assuming that something like that exists! Thanks again.

    2. I love Spanx tights — they come in a variety of sizes and they are quite opaque. Plus, they seem to offer the added shapewear benefit more than other tights I have tried. They are a bit pricey, however Spanx also sells a less expensive version at Target called Assets, which offer essentially the same opaqueness and shapewear benefit as the original Spanx (at least as far as I can tell).

      1. I like Merona tights from Target as well. They’re much more durable than the Assets brand shapewear I’ve gotten there. I had one pair that started to fall apart in the shapewear section during the first wear! I’ve also seen assets cropping up at places like AT Loft, but I am not sure if they have the tights or just the tank top/shorts.

  29. Several weeks back, several posts related to wearing denim at the office. I, along with others, espoused the wonders of Joe’s Jeans for casual Friday. The sample sale website Haute Look (www.hautelook.com) has Joe’s Jeans on sale right now for more than 50% off retail prices. I just bought two pairs for $69 each. Quite a steal! You do need to be a member to shop, however membership is free.

    1. The tights I have just don’t seem quite dressy enough to wear with a suit for the office. I can’t really explain it – they’re not sheer and smooth like the hose you would wear with a nice suit or dress. I guess I need to just go browse the hosery department at Nordstrom or Dillards and see what there is. Sorry I couldn’t be more specific.

  31. I had a very early ultrasound at about 6 weeks with my regular ObGyn, and based on that the doctor put my due date at April 21st. But I had another ultrasound six or seven weeks later, and then another today, both at a perinatology center – and based on those, the woman insisted that it looked like my due date was April 12th. Which should I believe? Everything I read suggested that the earliest ultrasound is the most reliable for dating purposes since there’s less variability (and I have a few other reasons for believing that’s closer), but the ultrasound technician was quite insistent about the earlier date.

    Not that it matters much for anything besides figuring out when my last day of work should be – mostly just curious. I’d be perfectly happy with the earlier date.

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