Thursday’s Workwear Report: Silk Blouse
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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
You know when you click on something, and then it seems to follow you around on the internet for weeks until you relent and buy it? Just me?
Anyway, this washable silk blouse from Quince is on its way to my house right now. I’ve had mixed experiences with Quince’s washable silk in the past, but the reviews on this top are fantastic and the forest green color is gorgeous. I would wear this to the office with high-waisted trousers and to dinner on the weekend with my favorite denim.
The blouse is $89.90 at Quince and comes in sizes XS-XL. It also comes in six other colors.
hunting for something similar? These are some of our favorite silky blouses without buttons.
Sales of note for 9/5/25
- Nordstrom – Summer sale has started, up to 60% off top brands
- Ann Taylor – Friends of Ann Event: 30% off your entire purchase, including new arrivals
- Anthropologie – 30% off clothing and accessories
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- J.Crew – Everyday styles from $34.50 — see our full roundup of what to buy for work at J.Crew
- J.Crew Factory – 50% off fall faves + extra 60% off clearance
- L.K. Bennett – 20% off all new-season
- Nordstrom Rack – Season Closeout: extra 40% off select clearance dresses, sandals, shorts, and swimwear(ends 9/11)
- Rothy's – Up to 50% off last-chance sales
- Soma – 5 panties for $39 + 35% off 3+ styles + buy 2 get 3 free panties — readers love these PJs and these no-VPL panties
- Talbots – 25-40% off select fall styles + extra 30% all markdowns — here are all the reader favorites at Talbots
- White House Black Market – 50% off all sale styles (ends 9/5)
tldr: Does anyone have a recommendation for a service that goes to the DC Courthouse to request records and then wait for them?
My parents married in the early 1980s in DC and I need a certified copy of their marriage certificate for an emotionally significant inheritance matter in another country. Unfortunately, no one in my family has a copy. I confirmed with an index in an archive that the record exists at the Marriage Bureau. Unfortunately, the archive didn’t have the actual records, just the index.
I have been trying for months to get the record, or even a status for my request, and crickets, despite the Marriage Bureau’s website’s statement that processing time is 20 business days. I have tried ordering online, calling, emailing, and even sending a request by mail. When I called, they did say the backlog is especially long, but in-person service is faster. I live too far away to go in person. Any recommendations for a service that can go in-person for me?
DC folks may have better options but I have used process servers local to the area for this type of thing.
I bet a local law firm could do this for you – they could probably send a paralegal.
I bet a local law firm could help – they could probably send a paralegal.
Try Washington Express (a courier service); call and ask if they can do it. If not, search court courier Washington DC and you’ll get some businesses.
I’d use Taskrabbit for this.
allow a silly question from the wardrobe challenged: I bought two interview suits, and I know to remove the tack stitching on the back vent, if that’s what it’s called.
The suits also have what looks like real pockets, but they are sewn shut with a full-on seam, plus another seam about an inch deeper into the pocket. Does that mean I shouldn’t open the pocket? If yes, why did they make it a real pocket instead of faux? One suit has this for the pants pocket, the other for the jacket pockets.
If you want to use the pockets undo the stitching. They are stitched shut because it helps line things up during manufacturing, it helps the garment lay flat for shipping and it prevents gaping if you want to wear it without pockets.
I think this is a great question. I have always thought that it gives you the option of opening the seam and using the pockets. often, especially for dress pants, the pockets will not lie flat when you sit down.
Looking forward to hearing what others think!
Can you tell if there is fabric for a pocket bag below that 1″ seam? If not, then they sound like fake pockets and the seams are just there to make the fabric lay nicely while being worn. I have trousers with fake back welt pockets like this. If I took that second, lower seam out, there would be an open slash into the inside of my trousers.
+1
in both cases, there is a complete pouch of lining type fabric that would form a pocket, except it’s double sewn shut. The laying flat part is of course always a question.
If there is a pocket bag, then it’s up to you! Do you want a functional pocket? Open it up.
Does it gape strangely after you open it? Sew it back shut. It’s easier to sew shut if the pocket bag isn’t underneath a lining, but not impossible if you are comfortable opening the lining temporarily.
+1
And for pants, if your figure veers toward hourglass or round, the pant will lay much better if you don’t cut the side pockets on them, if they are sewn shut. I even sew shut pockets on pants where they don’t come that way. I swear that even when the brand is cut for people with some curve, the suit pants are cut to fit nicely on a lanky, slim-hipped figure and the rest of us are somewhere between kind of and majorly screwed on being able to wear suit pants that don’t gape at the side pockets.
I’d ask my tailor – I have some jackets like that and I’ve had them take out the seams and make pockets. It might need some help.
I open one pocket in a suit jacket for my phone and leave the rest closed, personally.
Work dress question – I’m headed to London for a week at one of my NGO’s main offices. If I wear a dress, do I need to wear stockings/hose or are bare legs ok? And does anyone know if trouser jeans would work for a London business casual office that leans toward the business side? I’d wear them with a silk blouse and heels, but I can swap in a pair of actual pants if that works better.
In europe, and really for any environment I don’t know that well, I’d always choose black pants over jeans, even dark jeans. Black pants are never going to be too dressy and jeans absolutely can be too casual.
A friend in London messaged from her morning commute today with the commentary: “Black tights season has begun” so I think I’d wear them?
I wouldn’t wear them. I went to a church growing up where we had “Blue Jean Sunday” once a month, and women would wear trouser jeans. I honestly don’t understand the use case for them, but that may be my upbringing.
My husband’s BIL died suddenly, at 45, in his sleep. He said he wasn’t feeling well, went out to the couch, fell asleep watching TV, and never woke up. He had been heavier in the past, but had lost a good bit of weight before I arrived on scene and kept it off for the time I’ve been around (about 5 years). In all of the shock, DH didn’t ask his sister why this happened (I’m not sure she knows) and it hasn’t come up (at the funeral or since). We don’t live locally. It’s flipping DH out a bit that this happened (and DH is at the point where he is having some health issues due to his size). I can’t say that I blame him — he is the oldest man in his biological family and has been for decades because prior to statins, they all suddenly died in their 50s/60s. I guess other than knowing heart attack and pulmonary embolism symptoms (the only two things I’m aware of that could kill you like this) and maybe being pro-active if anything seems terribly off, all I’m left with is the profound sense that every moment is a gift. Is there anything else I can / should do to support DH? Maybe take walks (always good for you) and connect? Make sure he gets his physicals and watch any concerning #s on bloodwork? It’s still a big emotional shock, but this one has deeper waves than I’ve encountered before (and 45 is so young).
What a shock. I’m so sorry.
I’m sorry. In our family it was a ruptured aneurysm that could have been identified on MRI if one had ever been done, but until then there was no indication for one. But it is the kind of thing that can run in families and blood related family members were advised at the time to be screened. I still don’t understand all of the psychology that went into different people’s decisions to take that advice and be screened or to disregard the recommendation altogether. There are things that no one can predict or prevent that can catch up with us unexpectedly, so it’s not healthy to pretend we can control things. But sometimes a wake up call does help us take action if there are things we’ve been avoiding. So I guess I wonder, is your DH in a place where he wants to be proactive and get medical help for the health issues he’s already been having? (Waiting until something seems terribly off is reactive, not proactive!) Or is this not as much about health and more about mortality and uncertainty and grief? I think taking walks and connecting is a good idea no matter what.
Aneurysms are a good thing to bring up. IIRC, one of the GOT actresses had one at a very young age (and lived because she recognized that something was terribly off and was able to get medical attention promptly).
I’m sorry, that’s very sad and shocking for your husband. I’d gently suggest he raise this with a primary care doctor and ask about preventitive testing (an EKG and/or an MRI seem like they’d be a fit for this type of thing).
I agree on the psychology piece – I have a higher risk of cancer due to Jewish heritage and I am religious about my screening tests. On the other hand two of my cousins refuse to get their screenings because it stresses them out.
If this happened in my family I would absolutely want to know what actually happened. Maybe they didn’t do an autopsy and find out? Is that an option?
When a middle-aged man in my family died of something potentially genetic every one immediately got tested.
No one has mentioned an autopsy.
I know from a state to live in, from a prior job, that autopsies were mandatory for unattended deaths (like you live alone and police have to break down the door for a welfare check and find your body), within X hours of admission to or discharge from a hospital, and if you are in police custody when you die (as much as to assign blame and to protect from lawsuits). IDK how many states are like that and if it is full autopsy vs abbreviated. I know that when my mother died, because she had terminal cancer, it was just reported as such (and I don’t doubt that was true, even if there could have been other contributing causes). I also think that those are government records that aren’t fully public records, so it may be that you can’t access them even if you are part of the extended family (it may just be spouse, descendants, parents).
I don’t necessarily disagree with you in theory, but 1) it sounds like this person is not actually blood-related, and 2) please don’t be the person who goes to a grieving widow for medical details (or ask her to do an autopsy! That is her decision, and it sounds like the funeral is over anyway and the time for that has passed anyway). I have some relatives who immediately ask a lot of medical questions, and it can be really hurtful even with no ill intentions.
My FIL died very young of a disease that is either a fluke genetic malfunction, or caused by something that is incredibly likely to be hereditary. I was really angry after he died bc his wife did not have an autopsy, which would have revealed whether his kids are likely to inherit the disease (my husband and his brother) or it was just bad luck.
With some perspective, I realized it wasn’t fair for me to be angry at her – it wasn’t my call, and she was dealing with her own sadness/emotions at the situation. There is further testing that my husband/BIL could do to rule out if they are carriers, but neither wants to do it. So, just like it is their call not to get tested, it was hers not to have an autopsy. The disease is also non curable, so if the autopsy revealed it’s the genetic form, they basically could assume one or both had a death sentence. With a lot of hindsight, I’m glad he didn’t have the autopsy. Yes, it would have been amazing to rule out the hereditary form of the disease, but if was hereditary, the brothers would have known at a very young age they are likely carriers of a non curable deadly disease. We all kind of know it may still happen, but it’s different than KNOWING you have it or just waiting for it.
I agree that it’s a human trait to want to explain the terrible and understand why something happened. But you have to read the room. If the most affected people aren’t talking about it, just it be that way. Years later, a kid (or blood relative) can ask, “Aunt Kim, I have a form to fill out and I remember that Uncle Tim died so young and IDK if there is anything to put down that my doctor should know about.” That seems fair also. And in the meantime, you can talk to your doctor about what might have happened and how those conditions present. z
He’s not related to the dead man by blood
I wouldn’t be asking about the husband brother in law’s private health information or autopsy.
I understand why the op and her husband are concerned about her husband’s health but I think being emotionally supportive for his sister should be the priority. The details of the BILs health aren’t really their business, in my opinion. It’s different than a blood relative where I might see your point.
I’m very sorry for your loss. Recently, a 42-year-old woman and a 50-year-old woman in my circle of acquaintances died from similar circumstances. The 42-year-old was in excellent health, ran half-marathons, and had a freak blood clot that turned into a much bigger issue. The 50-year-old had a heart attack. All this to say: this is the age when things start to happen. It’s awful, and not always terribly easy to predict. I am all for doing our best to live healthy lifestyles, but sometimes bad things just happen, and it hits harder when it’s someone you know well or identify with in some way. Keep supporting your DH in whatever way works for him, whether that’s emotionally or encouraging him to make healthy lifestyle choices. If I’ve learned anything in helping a spouse through grief, it’s that you need to follow their lead.
One of the fittest and healthiest men I ever knew fell over dead on the track from and aneurism. Being confronted with the uncertainly of life is harsh and unsettling, and it can take a while to process through having that change from knowing that theoretically with your head and knowing it for real in your head and your heart. I think all you can do is be supportive of your husband’s efforts to be healthy, and see if he needs any assistance, your or professional, in sorting through his thoughts and emotions on it.
I’m sorry. My DH’s boss/mentor/friend died suddenly at 42 (from an aortic aneurysm). It really shook him up, but after the initial shock he tried to channel that into healthier eating and living habits. Just be there to talk about it and support him at first, for us the initial shock was kind of paralyzing and it took a while to process.
Physicals and telling your PCP “there’s a history of men dying young & unexpectedly in my family – these particular biological relatives” (even if he doesn’t know exactly why/isn’t sure what to mark on the family history chart)
(Just to clarify – it sounds like your BIL is not your husband’s biological relative – he’s your husband’s biological sister’s husband, yes? In this case, the “why” is irrelevant; but if he is a biological relative, I think after some time it would be ok to ask her if there is any medical history she’s comfortable sharing that would be good for his doc to know)
On the emotional side – yes, of course this is hard! I don’t know your husband, so I don’t know how he copes with difficult things – eg. walks & quiet time to reflect vs. talking it over in detail, vs pouring time and energy into some meaningful project, are there practical things like setting up a will, life insurance, etc that some people get a lot of peace from having “arranged”. But just want to validate that, of course, this is a hard, difficult thing! and it’s completely normal for both of you to feel shaken – give yourself space to feel that.
I’m sorry for your loss, OP. There’s no easy way to put this, but in my cohort of 30-somethings, these deaths have been drug overdoses, acute alcohol poisoning, or suicides more often than not. Sometimes the families don’t want to talk about it or don’t know how to talk about. So it may not just be the garden variety middle age heart attack you think it is.
Whatever the cause, you husband may benefit from a grief counseling group in you area.
I’m so sorry for your loss. My dad had a stroke 15 years ago (despite being very healthy, he maintained his weight, exercised, didn’t smoke and rarely drank). He has been “incapacitated” since and the last 15 years have not been easy. However, I am extremely thankful my parents thought ahead of time to save for a rainy day and have a solid financial plan and that they did estate planning in advance especially financial and medical powers of attorney. Every moment is a gift, and I’ve had the mentality to prepare for the worst, but hope for the best in life. Now that I am married with 2 kids, my husband and I always make sure to save for a rainy day and we have our estate plan in place. We also make sure to get regular checkups, watch what we eat and exercise regularly. Also, stress is a major concern and I am fairly certain that contributed to my dad’s stroke– my husband and I tend to overwork ourselves, but I do make sure we have a relaxing vacation once a year, time away from devices weekly and we try our best to manage stress in general (haha not easy with 2 toddlers running around!). Maybe come up with a plan together to support each other in your goals to do what you can to live a healthy, happy and long life together.
If you’re going for a multi-day work conference where people do seem to change for dinner (particularly the women), are any of you able to do that in one bag? This involved a cross-country (but direct) flight, so I wear a full comfy outfit and sneakers on the plans (vs flying in work attire).
Yes, I use the Away bigger carryon roller bag. I roll up the clothes I can and try to fold my suits flat. I always unpack when I get there and iron my clothes. I wear my travel sneakers to the hotel gym when I work out. Dresses for evening help, because they roll up smaller.
Of course. I can do ten days in Europe in one bag. I can’t imagine ever needing two bags for a trip
Yes, 100%, and to bring workout shoes in addition. What do you have in your bag?!
do they change into dressier clothes or more casual clothes for dinner?
I just came back from a conf and managed all in one bag, but I wore (comfy pull on) work pants, fashion sneakers, and a blazer, which I tucked the overhead bin on the plane. Two business casual dresses, and a denim jacket to make them more casual for after-hours, one more pair of pull on pants, a blouse, and a cardigan. One pair of flats, one pair of heels (I could have skipped those).
Yes, look into rolling your clothes and using packing cubes.
PSA: finally found a vitamin C serum that doesn’t smell like hot dog water! Poems from the Lab Future Focus. Also cheaper than the CE ferulic that my derm told me was good (that one smells horrific and I can’t handle it). NB that it does cause pilling for my concealer if I put it right under my eye or if I use too thick of a layer.
does it help with pilling if you wait a bit before starting to apply makeup?
Long shot but has anyone had residual kidney damage from preeclampsia/HELLP? It looks like I do (lucky me) and I could use some advice on how to advocate for myself. The nephrologist wasn’t too concerned since just one marker of kidney health is bad (it’s proteinuria), but admitted OB causes aren’t his specialty. The MFM was sort of like “go talk to nephrology” since I’m no longer pregnant/about to be past one year PP and I’m not sure if there’s some other avenue I should be pushing for.
Is nephrology brining you back in 6 months a year?
What’s your eGFR? That should be on MyChart from any comprehensive metabolic panel (that might be done at your annual physical).
Also, how’s your blood pressure?
Thanks to my family’s kidney issues, I am all about the things that come up with kidneys.
It was normal. I also have normal/low BP.
That’s reassuring! Can you find a GYN and book a “new problem visit” to discuss? I had a friend with HELPP and there were some ongoing things but I can’t recall what exactly. It’s not a super-common reaction but there may be someone in your city who sees more of it and maybe you could self-refer there for peace of mind. They may have a friendly kidney person also.
I don’t have this; I do have the impression that there’s a game of hot potato happening where nephrology wants primary care providers to handle kidney issues under a certain degree of severity, and primary care wants nephrology to manage anything kidney. The worst case scenario is that it goes poorly managed until it’s bad enough for nephrology to start caring! But I’m not sure if this is where you involve a good internist or how to end that game of being passed back and forth.
Look at the end of the day her kidneys sound basically fine. Idk what anyone expects will be done further? Book a follow up in a year to check on them.
I have a friend who plans to leave the US and start living and working remotely abroad for her US employer (IDK how legal this is for a long-term stay; any visas I’ve ever had expressly forbade working, but I understood that as arising out of “don’t take a job from a local” concerns). OTOH, I am going to Italy on vacation and if I happen to need to respond to an e-mail while I’m away, I’m assuming that that doesn’t rise to the level of “work” that ought to concern me (or them; I want to NOT be working and due to kids in school, will be returning promptly to the US). Is there any good comprehensive guide to this I could skim through at lunch? I wonder how this is for the various office professions (CPAs, lawyers) that have licenses. I’m sure the tax people and maybe payroll probably have thought through this and have opinions.
Check your employer’s policy first. My company doesn’t allow us to use company-owned devices abroad unless we get clearance in advance for a specific client. My coworker actually had their device locked remotely when they tried to use it on vacation.
So many hypotheticals and quasi-hypotheticals all the time 😑
yeah you get a different visa if you are going to be living and working somewhere. Some countries specifically market “digital nomad” visas for this exact hypo.
I cannot imagine being worried about Italy caring about me sending a couple of emails while on vacation, but your employer may have notice or approval requirements to keep system access abroad.
I could use a pep talk that I can Do the Thing! I have a last-minute work assignment tomorrow that’s outside my comfort zone. I’m nervous! I think I can do at least a B-level job, although my heart will always want to earn the A.
Do the Thing! It will clear up the time and energy you are using to dread doing the thing, and you will feel so much better.
B’s get degrees! B’s get degrees!
You can do it, and I promise you that having someone available who can step up and do a solid B job on a last-minute assignment outside of their main wheelhouse is an incredibly valuable person to have on your team (honestly, in many companies I’ve worked at, more valuable than the person who can do A work but only if narrowly scoped and 100% predictable)
You and me both! We both got this. Let’s Do The Thing!
If you have used the RealReal for consignment, have a question for you. I tried it for the first time and consigned a pair of designer jeans about 2 to 3 weeks ago. Just got a notice from UPS that I should expect a package from their consignment center in Phoenix tomorrow. Does this mean they didn’t sell and are sending them back?
My former partner and I consigned items and they lost many of them. and only provide value to reimburse for what they valued them at, so I would advise anyone not to consign with them. [It probably means they did not accept your item for sale, but they are a hot mess so hard to say.]
When I tried the RealReal they told me they would take some items, then said “actually we aren’t taking that category/brand right now” and shipped them back to me. They keep the stuff they are selling for much longer than 2-3 weeks.
Ultimately I didn’t find it worth the effort. The payout for brand-new high-end items was so small that I should have just donated.
I am looking for a hobby, I think.
I am 43, 2 kids, fantastic but stressful job, happily married. In short, life is good. But I am bored. My entire life revolves around work or managing the family calendar/household. I want to do something entirely fun and purely for my own enjoyment.
Suggestions?
What hobbies or activities did you like as a kid?
I’m going to be traveling a lot for work conferences. I mainly WFH so I don’t have a large work wardrobe – it’s basically one black-and-cream work dress, cream colored blazer, black blazer, black pinstripe suit.
These are public sector/government conferences, and not necessarily in the US. So they are not 100% business formal, there is more flexibility.
Any suggestions on some wardrobe staples for this>
Kat – the “Post Comment” button keeps taking me to a search error page, telling me to try my search with different terms.
This happens whenever I try to reply, but apparently I can post new comments.