Beauty Wednesday: Lash Extensions and the Professional Woman

2018 Update: We still think this is a great discussion on lash extensions and the professional woman — but you may also want to check out our more recent discussions of false eyelashes for the office, including my magnetic lashes review.

The hunt for the perfect, clump-free mascara can be trying — are lash extensions the answer?  The first person to introduce me to this concept was Amber Katz of Beauty Blogging Junkie — we met at a PR dinner for bloggers and I couldn’t take my eyes off her lashes!  Today she’s sharing some of the most common questions she gets (both as a beauty blogger and a girl with fabulous lashes) here with us today.  Welcome, Amber! – Kat

I’m so excited to guest post today on Corporette. It’s especially apropos as I’m just “rolling off” an 8-year corporate experience fully to be 100% freelance. After 3 jobs at various financial firms ranging from suit-corporate to business casual, I’m fully versed in the magical world of staid nail polish, patent pumps and wearing hemlines that won’t cause people to call me “that girl who wears the minis” at work. Running a beauty and fashion blog by night and being a financial writer by day often caused wardrobe conundrums–anything I wore that was appropriate for my day job made me look as if I belonged at a nunnery at my post-work event. By the same token, anything I wore that was remotely fashionable and cool for a beauty launch was TOTALLY tarty for work. But one thing that was always appropriate and–dare I use this terminology–a PARADIGM SHIFT? My eyelash extensions. I started getting them in 2009 and I haven’t stopped. I tell you, corporate women of the world–this procedure while lengthy in one shot will save you an abundance of time in the morning putting on mascara and liner. You simply won’t need it for daytime. Imagine a world where you WAKE UP Starbucks ready. It’s amazing and I’m never going back to the clumpy world of mascara. However, be prepared for a metric TON of questions about your lashes. I half-joke that 87% of my conversations are lash-extension related. I’m constantly answering the same few questions from everyone to my former financial side-hustle’s CFO to the woman in front of me at Jamba Juice. Here they are:

1. What kind of mascara are you wearing?
I’m not wearing mascara. These are lash extensions.

2. Do you do it yourself every morning? How long does the treatment take?
No, I go once every 4-6 weeks to a lash technician to get them applied. The process takes about two hours. Your lashes are taped down and a lash tech glues an individual lash to each of your eyelashes so they look thicker, darker, longer and more dense. It yields the effect of liner and mascara.

3. How long does it last?
About 3-6 weeks, depending on where you go. Most places charge less the more often you get touched up.

4. Does it hurt?
It doesn’t hurt, but if your eyes are sensitive, the glue may bother you a bit. Also, it takes about a day to get used to seeing the lashes in your peripheral vision (just a tiny bit), but you get used it.

5. Is there a break-in period? Or can you go do dinner afterwards looking great?
Nope, unless your eyes are sensitive, you can do whatever you need to do right after. But be prepared: You’ll be obsessed with checking yourself out in the mirror.

6. Are there different styles of lashes?
Yes, there are “C” curls and “J” curls. I always go with the former for a more awake, curled lash look. Also, they come in different lengths. I always get “11s” with “12s” on the ends. I have no idea what this means, but it produces a ’60s effect that’s dramatic, but not too drag queeny. I have friends who get “13s” and “14s,” but even that’s a bit much for me–despite my flaming inner gay man.

7. Where do you go?
I go to Courtney Akai, who has her own lash boutique. She’s amazing, but a little pricey. Her prices range from $250-$500, depending on which technician you see. She is the absolute best. I used to go to JJ Eyelashes (about $120 for a full set) and while they’re decent, Courtney’s quality is MUCH more impressive and her lashes last about twice as long.

8. How much does it cost?
See above!

9. What’s happening underneath? Does it break off all your lashes?
I actually am not sure, as I have been reapplying them every 4-6 weeks but I do let them run down to almost nothing and I haven’t noticed that my lashes are weaker. Says Courtney, “As long as you don’t tamper with them (rub, pull, pick or play with them), you’re natural lashes won’t be shorter or weaker. ”

10. What’s involved in the procedure? Is it a single strip?
Nope, they’re individual synthetic lashes (some lash boutiques have mink ones, as well) that are glued carefully to each of your natural lashes.

11. Can you wear mascara? What about shadow and liner?
You can wear mascara, but it’s difficult to remove. Besides, why would you want to when your lashes are already dark, thick and long (the entire point of mascara)? Shadow and liner are fine to wear with extensions–just take it off with Q-tips and eye makeup remover instead of your regularly scheduled wash.

Happy extensioning!

Readers, have you ever tried lash extensions? What have your experiences been? (You can also read more about Amber’s experiences with lash extensions here!)


Interested in writing something similar for Corporette? Check out our guest posting guidelines.



  1. Am I reading this correctly? $250 to $500 for lash extensions, and you need to get them done every 4-6 weeks?

    I’m a firm believer in “spend your money how you want, provided you have it in the bank, and don’t judge me on how I spend mine,” so I’m not judging the writer’s choice here – I’m just SHOCKED at how much it costs! I admittedly know nothing about eyelash extensions and would not have ballparked them anywhere near this!

    • Right there with you, anon. That is a lot of money for the savings of time in the morning (which has to be offset by the time to go in and have the extensions put on). I have such a hard time imagining a world in which this is something I would indulge in.

    • Anon For This :

      Yeah, she had me until the price. Yikes! That’s like a used car every year!

    • I agree completely. I also couldn’t see putting two hours into it that often (Would that actually, in the long run, save time? I can’t imagine that it takes me more than about 45 seconds to put on mascara and eyeliner each day.) I can hardly find time to get my hair cut every 4-6 months (which rarely takes an hour), so I really don’t think that I could keep up with that.

    • Research, not Law :

      I posted below, but eyelash tinting a great – and far cheaper – alternative, assuming you’re just wanting to skip mascara (it won’t add bulk or length).

    • My exact thoughts!

      • Anonymous :

        Typically first visit to have full set put on is the expensive part. After that it is like getting your acrylic nails rebased or your roots done. I charge between $25-$50 for eyelash fills or maintenance. Then again I only charge between $175-$225 for initial visit.

    • Anonymous :

      I am a third year attorney and have been getting my lashes done for a few years now. I absolutely LOVE them and cannot imagine life without them after having them for so long. As an aside, although I do love in a very expensive part of California (Santa Barbara) I do not pay nearly as much to get them some. I got a Groupon for the full set and paid around $80. I pay $120 each time I get them filled, which is also every 4-6 weeks. Although it is pricey, it is 100% worth it. I get so many compliments and it is definitely nice to be able to roll out of bed and not have to put mascara on. Don’t knock it until you try it!

  2. Anonymous13 :

    Threadjack! I’ve been a lawyer for just a little over a year now, and I’ve been asked to serve as a peer mentor to an even newer lawyer in my organization. I’ve never mentored anyone before and I hardly feel like I know what I’m doing myself. Any advice? I’ve had negative experiences with officially-assigned mentors who don’t have time to mentor me (or maybe just don’t care to), and I’d like this new lawyer’s experience with me to be a positive one.


    • I have been in the same situation for over a year, but I am lucky enough to have two great mentors myself. First, don’t worry! No need to be an expert at anything. In my experience a good mentor is someone who listens and knows where to find help. I always make sure to put aside whatever I am doing to answer quick mentee questions, but if more time is needed or I absoltuely can’t stop what i am doing, I let her know I will get back to her asap – an do. Other than that, I am honest and straight-forward about my thoughts, but always qualify by saying what I have heard others say. I feel that she will have to do politics with everyone else, so I should be the go-to person for honesty (e.g., that partner/boss/supervisor is touchy/anal/hard to get to focus, so make sure of x). If I don’t know the answer, I try to think of anyone else who might.
      Things that are now obvious to you may not be to the mentee, so you are more knowledgeable than you think. For example, my mentee has asked how to ask for vacation time, how to draft a tricky email, where to start with a research question, whether she is “required” to attend certain events, holiday gift practices, etc.
      Good luck!

    • I was assigned to be a liaison for my 6-person practice group my first week in the job because my supervisor thought I would know what questions to ask and where to ask them. It was daunting at first, but now it’s not a big deal. I tell people to feel free to call with any questions they might have and I try to get back with them as soon as I can. If I don’t really have time to help them that second or need to ask someone else, I will try to give them regular status updates so they know when they can hear from me.

      I actually end up reviewing a lot of written work, and that can be harder because sometimes it’s just not up to par. I try my best to provide constructive feedback without getting angry. Hopefully you won’t have quite as much responsibility to make sure the mentees are submitting/filing acceptable work.

    • One thing I would add is to check in with her every few weeks, just to let her know that you are still there for her. I’ve had mentors in the past who were nice to me for about the first week, and then just treated me like anyone else, and I wasn’t sure if I was still their “mentee”, or what (and I’m paranoid about bugging people if I think they don’t want to be bothered!).

    • It sounds like you’re being asked to serve as an organizational mentor, not a professional mentor (if that makes sense). No one expects a second-year lawyer to offer career advancement advice or substantive review of a new lawyer’s work. Instead, invite her to lunch and happy hour, introduce her to your colleagues, show her where the copier and coffee machine are located, and be friendly and available to help when she has questions.

  3. Anon, I had the SAME thought! All the power to anyone who does this, if this indulgence saves you time and makes you shine, but SHEESH! I grumble about my $120 single process (a/k/a, “what grays?”), and that’s not something I could do myself on the way out the door each morning. Yowzers.

  4. For $250, I can buy a whole year’s worth of high-end mascara, which I’m not sure is better than the regular drugstore-brand mascara. I’ll stick with my local drugstore, thank you.

    • Always a NYer :

      I agree, I find CoverGirl and Maybelline mascara to be better than high-end (i.e. Chanel and Clinique in my experience). The thought of getting this procedure done every 4-6 weeks freaks me out. As it is, I can’t stand the glaucoma test when I go to the eye doctor.

      What are your thoughts on permanent eyeliner? I love my black eyeliner but will gladly apply it everyday rather than have a tattoo needle come that close to my eye =/

      • Permanent eyeliner (or any permanent makeup) scares the bejeezus out of me. No un-medically-necessary needles in my face, please, not to mention I’ve yet to see it done well. Finally, I think there are simply times when makeup looks really out of place/silly (eg while exercising, or just after a bath/shower) and I can’t imagine wanting to look like I’m wearing freshly applied eyeliner all-the-time.

      • I think permanent make up usually looks terrible (but then again that is usually when I notice it). Your skin sags in unpredictible ways as you age. I wouldn’t do it.

      • I’m not a huge eyeliner person – when I do wear it, I wear Bobbi Brown gel eyeliner (love!). However, having recently had Lasik eye surgery, where they numb your eye so you don’t feel a thing (that and an anti-anxiety medicine), I would think maybe they’d do something similar for tattooed eyeliner?

      • Makeup Junkie :

        I love the idea of lash extensions but beauty tubes mascara will have to suffice for me. And at $12 a tube for 3 months, i can live with it!

      • SF Bay Associate :

        My Korean-American friend got permanent eyeliner done in LA and it looks really great. It’s a very thin line, so if she wants to look like she’s wearing eyeliner, she has to put on more, like usual. But for the regular everyday, especially on weekends, she always looks a little bit more polished thanks to the subtle eyeliner. From what I understand, this is a very normal thing to do in Korea.

      • I almost got permanent eyeliner. You have to look at how your face will age. The lines can accent the minor folds, wrinkles or sagging in some people. Just depends on your face, eye shape, and genes.

  5. I feel like the only woman in the world who doesn’t have lash extensions.

    And in order of worst offenders in ruining my enjoyment of True Blood, “Lash extensions” far outrank “Not enough naked Alcide.”

    Which is really saying something.

    • Anne Shirley :

      Yeah Alcide could really just skip clothes in general. And seriously who in their own dreams wears sexy lingerie whilst the dudes they are dreaming about are fully clothed?!?

    • Equity's Darling :

      You’re so not the only woman w/o lash extensions!

      And ditto on the Alcide. Now I have something to dream about during my OG Law Practice Group Meeting….

    • I don’t know anyone who’s had them either. Frankly, as much as I want to look polished and attractive at work, I would rather not invite my boss or clients or anyone at work to ask about my eyelashes (or admit that I have extensions – I would definitely be mocked/judged – in a nice way, but still – for going to that “level” of maintenance if I outed myself). I also don’t like committing to a beauty treatment that has an unattractive or difficult “growing out” period if you decide to stop (learned the hard way after having acrylic nails), which I imagine this might.

      Fortunately I have long-ish natural lashes that look just lovely with a few swipes of Maybelline Define-a-lash; maybe I’d feel differently if I didn’t. (As a side note – wouldn’t really long lashes run into your glasses? I have this problem with my regular lashes and it leaves little lightly smudged marks where the mascara rubs).

      Just to hazard a guess – would 11 and 12 refer to the mm length of the extensions?

      • Where I live, *lots* of women have them. Including my secretary, who continues to wear them despite the fact that the glue gives her atopic dermatitis!

        It’s cool with me if people want to wear them, or not. What bugs me is feeling like I’m meant to care about something I actually don’t care about. See also: teeth whitening.

        • That’s crazy about the dermatitis!

          Definitely did not mean to imply that I would care one way or the other if someone used them. I just know the reaction that I, personally, would get from my very practical colleagues. I would also feel a little too dramatic and flirtatious-looking with the eyelashes in the accompanying picture. But that’s just me – to each her own.

      • I have the natural-lashes-hitting-lenses problem too, which is another reason I’m not interested in extensions. (But I think it’s due more to the fact that the bridge of my nose is really high and narrow than me having enviably long lashes.)

    • There’s a woman who has them in my office and they look so obviously fake. I know she spends a lot of money but maybe they’re just too long?

  6. First off, I really love this format- the question and answers, the in depth discussion about something that I only had the most minimal knowledge about. I hope to see more like this!

    Second, though, I agree with everyone who’s commenting on the cost- that’s way too much, especially for something that has to be re-done so frequently. It also sounds like it would take far too much time, and for me at least, too much risk of winding up with something that looks weird (I’m a redhead with sparse lashes, so I’m sure that it wouldn’t be hard at all for me to get something that looks ridiculously fake on me, even if it looked normal on most everyone else.)

    But, a couple of years ago, I worked at the courthouse and some of the women there went through a phase where they were getting these- they looked pretty nice, said that they were supposed to last 30 days, and I’m *sure* they weren’t paying that much for them (these were middle-aged grandmothers making probably 35-45 K a year), so maybe it’s worth seeking out cheaper alternatives. I’ll at least keep my eyes open (though I’d still be worried about the redhead risk).

  7. This is very timely. I have been thinking about lash extensions for a while. The look is really fantastic — much better than anything a mascara can do (unless you are one of those lucky few who is just born with fantastic natural lashes). I am not sure if I would actually do it, as I agree it’s very pricey & I would rather spend money on paying off student loans, but it’s definitely something I can see as worthwhile if you can afford it. Thick lashes, not only obviate the need for make up and liner, but I think just make you look more invigorated and youthful.

    One question I have concerns lash extensions vs. latisse, etc. — Can anyone speak to their experience with Latisse or other lash growth products, is the result the same? Side effects? Other thoughts?

    • AnonInfinity :

      I agree with you AIMS — I think the point of the lash extensions isn’t to save time, but to have nicer looking eyelashes, generally. I like to tug on my eyelashes (thank goodness for anonymity…), so they’re definitely not for me. But I can see why someone would want them.

      I’ve never used Latisse, but the possibility that it might change my eye color is enough to scare me off.

      • I’ve used Latisse since last fall. It has made my lashes darker, thicker, and much longer, but a little more “natural” looking than the picture of the blogger with the extensions. It costs about $90 every six weeks, so it’s not cheap. For some reason, it’s covered by my FSA. I have brown eyes so discoloration wasn’t a concern. People have commented on how long my lashes are. It takes 5-10 seconds to apply every night. I’m happy with the results but it does take a while. After 2 mos. I saw some improvement, but it took 3 months for major changes and 4 mos for the full long full lash look.

    • Equity's Darling :

      re: Latisse Great minds ask similar questions? See my post a few below yours.

      My eyes are already brown, so the changing colour doesn’t freak me out. Really, I doubt I’d use it, I’m just more curious about those who have used it, and their feelings on it.

    • I’d heard bad things about Latisse and would never have the nerve or cash to do anything like lash extensions, but I tried Diorshow Maximizer, which is both a lash primer and an overnight “conditioner” and “plumper,” and I’m really liking it. It’s been a few months, and I apply it every morning and most nights as well. My lashes are fuller, better curled, and don’t fall out as often. I think a tube is around $30, but it’s lasting well.

    • Makeup Junkie :

      I’ve used Revitalash with good results. My lashes are a bit longer and lusher now, so that mascara looks amazing. I still do have to wear mascara though.

    • Hmm… Lots of food for thought. I have brown eyes but still worry about discoloration (irrationally?) with Latisse. I have read that sometimes purplish spots appear under the eye or on the lid. Probably from improper applicaton but still enough to give me pause. I have enough to worry about with dark circles and puffiness.

      May try one of the plumper/conditioner mascara first. Good idea. But I do so want to have crazy Bambi lashes ….

    • Latisse! LOVE! My first thought when I read this article was why on earth would anyone pay that much and go through that process when Latisse is so fantastic? I have very light eyes (chalky blue) and I certainly didn’t have any pigmentation. From my research, that generally only happens to light eyes with some brown or darker flecks in them already (think more hazel, maybe?). It is a fairly rare side effect.

      Also, I found that Latisse lasts much longer than the label would suggest. I can do 3-4 months on, 6 months off and still have the full effect. It makes it a lot cheaper over the course of a year. So worth it.

      I know this sounded like a Latisse commercial. I really love it that much.

      • Latisse is the best, really.

        I have done the extensions and I found that my lashes were much shorter after. Its really hard to take care of them, because you are not supposed to get them wet. Makes swimming impossible. And I found that even though I got the shortest length, they looked fake. I would get compliments on my lashes and I felt so lame admitting that they were extensions. I feel its extra superficial (not to be judgmental, just personally, it is beyond the level of high maintenance I fee that I am).

        Latisse looks natural. My eyelashes prob hit my brow bone now (with mascara) but it looks like I was just born really lucky. I usually pay 60 bucks a pop (which lasts me 4-5 months). I call all med-spa’s around me and find one who will give me a buy one get one free deal. Also, Latisse was originally medication for glaucoma. If you know someone with glaucoma, they get it for 5 bucks, or whatever their co-pay is.

        I am a pretty frugal person, but Latisse is something I will continue to spend the cash on. It makes me so happy!

  8. Yikes! They look fabulous but I have to wonder – how much mascara can I buy for $3500 per year?

  9. Equity's Darling :

    A friend in law school had these done. She looked fantatsic, but honestly, my thought was “so not worth it for me”.

    One of the reasons is because my existing lashes are long/dark/curly enough that they hit the lens on my glasses, which is really annoying, so clearly I already have long enough lashes, and exacerbating the problem is not worth it. I don’t even wear mascara generally (or other makeup, to be fair). The other reason is because I’d rather spend that amount of money on clothes, shoes, facials, other spa treatments…prety much anything. Plus, I hate having other people’s hands near my eyes.

    But, I could see how if you weren’t me, they could be worth it.

    I have a question about Latisse though- does it work? what’s the deal with it? A friend told me that her dad said it messes with you should you get glaucoma later on? Because the same drug is used for Latisse as glaucoma drops, so you have a resistance to it if it’s needed later? Does anyone use Latisse? Comments? Would Latisse plus lash extensions just be super crazy long/lush lashes?

    • My Dr. uses Latisse so I asked her about it. For her it works so well that she has to periodically cut her eyelashes with scissors. She has brown eyes so I don’t think the discoloring was a concern.

      For me personally, I don’t care for the look. Her lashes are so long and dark they resemble spider legs. To each her own.

  10. Hey, related threadjack: Eye-lash curlers. I’ve been using a cheap-o drug store one for years. I’ve recently noticed that my lashes seem to be growing all haphazard, and the curler just seems to make it worse. I have really deeply set eyes, and the last time I tried to buy a new one, I actually found that I wasn’t able to use it- it was too wide and couldn’t get close enough to my actual eyelid (yeah, never occured to me that that would be a problem).

    I’m leaning towards stopping curling all together, but I do prefer it on my sparse lashes. Any suggestions? I’m willing to buy a more expensive curler if it’s worthwhile, but I don’t want to buy one that I wind up not even being able to use again!

    • Shu Uemura. It’s the gold standard.

      • YES. I’ve also used the Shiseido one which is almost as good as the Shu. I have very straight lashes so I curl and apply mascara every day. They stay curled all day with no fuss.

      • SF Bay Associate :

        Seconded. Love mine. Lasts for years.

    • Sydney Bristow :

      I got a narrow eyelash curler a few years ago at Sephora and I love it. I was never able to get up close to my eyes with the regular sized ones. Much easier to get up close and maneuver with the narrow one.

    • Ok, I have to ask: how do you actually use an eyelash curler? As I understand it, you clamp the curler onto your lashes and then… what? Unclamp? Pull along the lashes? It gives me the heebie-jeebies just thinking about it – I’ve never actually been able to bring myself to use the curler for that reason. Not to mention, I think I read here on Corporette a few months ago that the curler doesn’t work unless you follow it with a coat of mascara. Maybe I’m the only person who feels this way, but my eyelashes are pretty dark already, and I truly can’t tell any difference when I have mascara on, except that I now have something on my eyes that gets into my eyes, smudges as the day goes on, etc.

      I tend to just use eyeliner to make a smooth line at the base of the lid (filling in the few sparse patches. Am I missing out on something by not using mascara? I really wonder, because all my friends talk about letting their pre-teen daughters wear mascara but NOT eyeliner, so I’m beginning to wonder if I’m “that girl” that everyone is talking about who is wearing too much eyeliner…

      • I don’t know how your mascara/liner thing is working out for you, but I love that people come here and ask those questions that everyone seems to know but no one ever tells you. (I’d never curled my lashes until I followed my college roommate’s lead, and borrowed her curler!)

        For curling, the curler works like a little clamp/press. You squeeze it together over your lashes for a few seconds, and then un-squeeze, that’s all. It does make a dramatic difference. It doesn’t need mascara to work, but the curl usually falls out pretty quickly, and mascara locks it in place for longer.

        If you’re happy with your current look, I woudn’ t change it. Personally, I like wearing liner, but think of mascara more as a necessary evil (I guess it’s not necessary, but it looks much better for me). I usually skip mascara when I’m feeling casual, because I can feel it on my eyes and it clumps up and such.

      • Lana Lang :

        If you are a little freaked out by eye-lash curlers, this may not be for you, but I swear by blowing my hairdryer over my curlers for 5-10 seconds or so to heat them slightly. The curl is better and it lasts longer – try it on your hand/arm first though so it’s not too hot.

        The thing about curlers is that even if you are freaked out, YOU are in control, so it’s up to you how close to your eye you go/how hard you press, so you can try it a little at a time until you feel more comfortable.

        Do not under any circumstances pull on the curlers because you will pull your eyelashes out and also curl first, mascara second, as otherwise your lashes will stick and may come out.

        I tend to wait about an hour or so and then curl over the dry mascara and that has a pretty dramatic effect but your mascara must be absolutely dry and the curlers absolutely clean (i.e. no mascara residue to act as adhesive).

      • You place it over your eye wiht both your eye and the curler open, then you squeeze it gently closed, hold it for a few seconds, and pulse a few times. For deeper curl you can heat the curler up with a blast of hot air from your blowdryer.

    • My Revlon one is surprisingly good. I’ve thought about getting a Shi Uemera because everyone says it’s the gold standard, but I figure that if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. I curl my lashes without mascara on and i make sure the curler is clean before using it, which helps to avoid damage. I have long and naturally curved lashes, too, so ymmv.

  11. Hey Corporettes! I have a threadjack question on behalf of my BF. He interviewed for a job recently and got a rejection email today which stated in part that, while they really enjoyed speaking with him, they felt the position they were interviewing for would “hold him back.” I am just wondering if anyone has any thoughts on what that could mean. Currently he works in a totally unrelated service position to pay the bills, but has a degree and several internships relevant to the position he applied for. My initial thought was that it was a diplomatic way of saying he came across as arrogant in the interview but I wonder if anyone out there has different ideas?

    BTW, I told him I would be asking this board and he was excited because he knows how much I value all of your insight, since I talk about it a lot. :-)

    • I think it is a diplomatic way of saying he is overqualified and therefore not the ideal candidate for the position.

    • Agreed about the overqualified thing. I think this is a common occurrence in the recession, and from my perspective (hiring an assistant) I think some employers are worried about hiring and training someone to then have them move on to greener pastures when the economy rebounds.

      • Thank you both. I should add, if they did mean “overqualified,” that would be surprising because according to him, (a) most other applicants had masters’ degrees and he only has a BA and (b) he has never held an actual “Job” in the field, only done internships and worked on a handful of independent projects in a related field.

        I also suggested to him that, since they took the time to write him a personal rejection instead of a form letter, it would probably be ok for him to very politely ask if they have any feedback or suggestions for him to use in his ongoing job search, and/or if they would be willing to elaborate on their concerns so he can try to avoid raising those concerns with other potential employers. Do you think this is a bad suggestion on my part?

        • I think that with this additional information the overqualified thing may not be the case, but there is only one way to know for sure. I think your suggestion is excellent, at this point in the process he has nothing to lose in asking (politely) for feedback and suggestions–but he has everything to gain: knowledge, information, and maybe they’ll like his willingness to learn and grow so much that he’s first on the list for the next opening. I think more people should follow-up after rejections in this manner for that reason alone.

    • It’s very possible he made some offhand remark about something he enjoys doing or would like to do professionally that this role won’t allow him to do.

      It’s very easy for interviewers to focus on one small thing a candidate has said that doesn’t 100% align with the role and get bent out of shape about it. In my office, we do some (very limited) business travel and our job descriptions typically mention that a willingness to travel is required. Sometimes candidates come in with a whole song and dance about how they love all travel including business travel and that’s what they’re looking forward to most. Our fault for not making the scope of the travel clear? Sure, but they still came across as a poor fit.

    • OilLondon :

      It happened to me once, I was puzzled but then asked for what they meant and it made sense…. I had never done this job or any related before, and thought it’d be a good development, but they said that I’d get bored after a year once I knew how everything worked, and that after that time I’d be keen to move on and they didn’t want to have then to hire someone else.
      I actually think it was really smart of them to think about that, and I did find another very challenging role in which I spent 4 years developing myself thank to their rejection!

      So I would ask them for feedback, this way he’ll know for sure!

  12. Thank you for the informative post. I am a little skeptical about the procedure so I think I’ll stick to the serum I currently use. I’ve tried Latisse, Dior, Loreal, and one that sells at NM because my eye-lashes used to break and fall on a daily basis. I”m in love with Dabalash. The product was introduced to me by a friend a couple of years ago, the only downside is that I have to order it through a Spa in AZ. Totally worth it though and only $150.

    • How long does a bottle last? How do you apply? Any side effects?

      • A tube lasts a few months maybe 3-4? depends how often I use it. At the beginning I was applying everyday but after a while I started looking like a bratz doll so I went for every 2-3 day. It’s applied as liquid eye liner with a tiny brush. As of yesterday no side effects yet- not itchy, smelly or anything out of the ordinary..feels like putting oil on your lash line . I would recommend making sure your face is spotless before applying so you don’t let the brush hold dirt or bacteria. Also wait until it dries before you put make up on.

  13. Also, as for the eyelashes, I don’t *think* i know anyone who has extensions. And while I am sure they are lovely, I would be kind of leery of doing something that attracted THAT MUCH attention to my physical appearance (i’m sure 87% of conversations is an exaggeration but still). I used to get mine dyed at $12 a pop every 2 or 3 weeks and I felt that it made mascara unneccessary but gave me a subtle darkening effect (and lengthening too, since my lashes are lighter at the ends, dying made the length I had show up more).

  14. The extensions as described make no sense whatsoever if you ask me. I recently got a Japanese eyelash perm (bye bye daily lash curlers). It costs $40 original price (I had a groupon, so even less). It takes 40 mins and lasts a minimum of 2 months (more like 3+). I still use mascara, but I don’t look as decrepit without it if I don’t use it. If you want to make your lashes darker, get them dyed on top of that as well. That’s also only $40.

    The cons are that the procedure feels a bit like that scene in Clockwork Orange when they are torturing the guy with graphic violence and keeping his eyes open. But I have particularly sensitive eyes. The other women looked perfectly fine (it was an open floor procedure place, if that makes sense). But I imagine sitting for 2 hrs getting extensions is no picnic either.

    • Anonymous :

      Where did you get this done? Any recs for the NYC area?

      • Lavilash Parlor. It is in a dingy building in the Herald Sq area and it’s just an open room with all japanese eyelash professionals, but it got the job done.

        I’m sure there are nicer spas/salons that provide this service too – maybe a yelp scan?

  15. I don’t think I want to spend $250 on lashes every 4-6 weeks. I love my eyes and with a little liner, shadow and mascara, I am out the door. I am a big fan of Carmindy’s “Five Minute Face” rule. If people are spending time wondering if my eyes are natural (I have brilliant blue natural eyes! Thanks Dad!) or my lashes are are natural, then they are not busy enough.

  16. Diana Barry :

    This is one of those things that it would be great if I could get them for free once to see how it works, but can’t imagine spending money on. I rarely even wear mascara (only once every 2 weeks?) so it would really not be worth it for me.

  17. Anonymous :

    Not knocking anyone who digs em, but for me, I would not want to be conspicuous, aesthetically or financially. People get the vapors here about skirt zippers. I think I have finally met my own pearl-clutching moment. A bridge too far.

  18. I tried lash extensions to see if I wanted to get them for my wedding, and three days later I woke up with my eyes almost swollen shut and itchy. It was an allergic reaction to the glue, which I’ve since learned is quite common. I had to go back to the salon and have them taken off, since you can’t get them off yourself. Anyway, for the three days I had them I looked fantastic, but I would definitely suggest doing an allergy test before getting them done.

    • Anyone doing that to my eyes (or anything similar anywhere on my face) needs to have graduated from medical school and passed his or her licensing exam.

  19. Research, not Law :

    I recommend getting your eyelashes tinted. You can get it done at most salons or spas for less than $20 and about 15 minutes. I have long, nice, but transparent eyelashes (redhead) and love it.

    • Thank you for this! Off to go check out how it works on my (super-blonde at the tips) lashes.

  20. Yeah, I love the look when I occasionally wear fake eyelashes, and suspect I would love the look of having these, too…but not love it enough for that price!!

  21. anon chi law :

    I am so anxious to try lash extensions! Just as soon as I’ve got the disposable income, I guess …

    Quick etiquette/professionalism threadjack:
    I was raised in the “yes, ma’am; no, sir” habit since I was very very young. I was wondering if people had thoughts on this as I’m entering my professional life. Does it make me sound like a little girl? Still considered polite?

    • I’m not sure what the answer is, but I’d say that it is very, very regional (I’m saying this as a NJ born girl who moved to the south as a child.) So, if you are not in the region in which you grew up, tread carefully.

      • AnonInfinity :

        Good point that I forgot to mention. I’m still in the South, so it’s very okay to “sir” or “ma’am” generally.

    • AnonInfinity :

      I was raised the same way — my grandma would not answer if you left off the “ma’am.”

      I just started out, but I feel like I give off the “little sister/grandchild/daughter” vibe somehow, so I have made myself stop saying “sir” and “ma’am.” I’ve caught myself doing it with clients sometimes because it’s my default polite mode, but never with other lawyers.

    • I’ve gotten a lot of “are you military?” when I sir/ma’am people.

    • anon professor :

      I live in the South and find it kinda odd when adults use it except when speaking with an elderly person or a service provider (waitress, call-center person you’re on hold for forever, etc.). Having students call me ma’am makes me feel old!

    • Our intern ‘sir’ed our boss on the first day and we made fun of him relentlessly (he was a jokey kind of guy so it was all in good fun). It definitely is overly formal for my east coast, collegial, collaborative office. We have several ex-military colleagues, including ones who are very high up the office food chain, and they go by their first names (as does everyone else).

    • I was raised to say “sir” and “ma’am” as well. I work at a Texas state appellate court and find that the judges on the court respond positively when I say “sir” or “ma’am.” I use them when I am speaking to someone in an authority position or a much older attorney (60+). Because I am not in a law firm, I am not sure how I would address a partner. I imagine if you are on a first name basis with the person, “sir” or “ma’am” would be out of place. I am also still in my twenties and I imagine I will be using those terms less and less the older I get.

    • Esquirette :

      Preface: I am not from the South and was not raised using these terms but have lived in the South for a number of years now and work in a law firm where most people are from the area. I’m young for my office but am in my early 30s.

      As an attorney, it would be better not to sir/ma’am people – with some caveats – as it really sets up a strong hierarchy, with you at the bottom. The hierarchy is always there but setting it up in conversation really seems to make for a less congenial atmosphere. In my office, everyone is on a first name basis, and the atmosphere is very congenial, so I don’t sir or ma’am any attorneys (unless I’m joking around). I occasionally see other attorneys who have been raised in the South use the terms but usually only when the response is kind of made automatically or with particular respect to our oldest partner. It really will depend on the atmosphere and current practices in your office. If people in your office don’t use these terms, you will seem odd for doing so regularly. This will go doubly so if you are not in the South or Texas, where these terms are not in general usage amongst people who know each other.

      Caveats: I generally would only consider using sir/ma’am when speaking to a very senior partner who was austere and the type that would expect it (e.g., a senior partner whom people refer to as Mr. “X” or Ms. “Y”). I occassionally might ma’am or sir some of our staff but this is done more affectionately or when showing particular appreciation for some effort they’ve made. I find it awkward when the staff ma’ams me as I am younger than pretty much all of them. I would caution you on doing so in your office unless you don’t know the person’s name (which you could address by introducing yourself, as you’re the new person).

  22. Threadjack:
    This may seem like a silly recommendation request, but does anyone have a travel hair dryer they really love, that lasts? I am talking about a compact dryer that either folds or is just really small to pack in luggage. I have gone through two travel hair dryers that didn’t last more than 4 uses in the last six months, and I am fed up. I know a lot of hotels have dryers now, but I never feel like they work as well as my ionic home hair dryer, and I know they make travel dryers with ionic/tourmaline features. Recommendations?

    • I got one from one of those travel companies — I think it was either Magellan or TravelSmith — that has worked for years.

  23. Alanna of Trebond :

    Self-congratulatory threadjack: Just accepted a federal court of appeals clerkship in the court I want to clerk in! I can’t really tell anyone at school because the “plan” interviews haven’t happened yet and everyone who is applying for clerkships are super stressed anyway.

    Love all the guest posts recently!

  24. My two cents on eyelashes:

    1. I recently found a drugstore mascara that I absolutely love: Almay Get Up & Grow one-coat waterproof mascara. It has a wide, bristly brush that almost completely eliminates clumps, and it stays on all day, and I think it was less than ten bucks. I have short, light, sparse eyelashes that are practically invisible without mascara, and this Almay stuff makes them look long and lush. This is the happiest I’ve been with my eyelashes in I don’t know how long.

    2. My sister does Latisse, and her eyelashes are ridiculously long. She’s an over-the-top kind of person when it comes to hair, makeup, wardrobe, etc., and really loves to stand out, so it works for her, but I don’t care for it – I’m a little more subdued in my look. She, too, has a million conversations about her eyelashes every day – everybody asks her about them.

  25. attiredattorney :

    I use L’Oreal’s eye lash growth serum. It’s about $10-12 at your local drugstore, and a single tube lasts forever. I see noticeable results after about a week of use, twice a day.

  26. I have average thickness, short blond lashes. I wear mascara pretty religiously, because otherwise I look kind of asleep. To be honest, I would LOVE last extensions. The few times I’ve had false eyelashes professionally done it has looked awesome and really amped up my confidence. Unfortunately I don’t have the money to spend on extensions. I will definitely be investigating some of the options people have discussed above.

  27. I would LOVE to try lash extensions, but they seem sooo expensive. Imagine the shoes I could be buying!

    That said, one of my BFF’s from college got them & they look fantastic – very natural, but with a lot of impact, if that makes sense. Sort of a “you only better” thing. I have naturally long eyelashes (ditto on the “hitting the glasses” problem) but they have some gaps in them, so I’m thinking of going for a cheaper partial version just to fill in the gaps.

  28. I just wish I could have my son’s eyelashes! They are so long and thick. People are constantly commenting on them. When he was a newborn, they seriously went half way down his face, below his nose when his eyes were closed. Why do the boys always get the beautiful eyelashes??

    • Alanna of Trebond :

      This is so true. My adorable little cousin (who’s now 5) has the best eyelashes! Actually, my boyfriend has nice eyelashes too. Le sigh.

    • Same here. My 4 yr old boy’s lashes look like Barbie’s thick curling ones. They leave actual shadows on his face !

      My 5 yr old nephew has lashes so thick and curling that you cannot see his individual lashes!

      Grrrr – I am jealous.

  29. Just a word of caution: I got extensions early this summer and the WRECKED my lashes. I would be very careful about getting this treatment.

  30. Curling your eyelashes with hot metal? Coating your eyelashes with ink (i.e., mascara?) Tinting your eyelashes? Eyelash extensions? Eyelash perms? Medicine to thicken your eyelashes that also changes the color of your eyes?

    Am I really the only one who thinks this is all a bit insane?

    • i’m sure you’re not the only one, but mascara and eyelash curlers are so commonplace, i’m not sure why they register any shock. both are available at nearly every drugstore in the US.

      eyelash tinting, extensions, perms, latisse … is it any more far-fetched than dyeing or perming your hair, getting a tattoo, or pouring hot wax on your legs to remove the hair? maybe it’s not to your taste, but it’s not all that unusual.

  31. Hiatus815 :

    Imagine a world where you WAKE UP Starbucks ready.

    WOW. Really?! This didn’t raise a red flag for anyone else?

    How about, “Imagine a world where you AREN’T so obsessed with looking pretty that you can go get a morning coffee without mascara?”

    Excuse me while I go inflict my makeup-free face upon the world.

    (I’m not anti-makeup. But I am against the idea the idea that it’s somehow mandatory if you plan to go out in public.)

    • I tend to agree with this. I leave the house without make-up regularly, especially on weekends. This is what my face looks like, and that’s OK.

      Also, the idea of lashes so noticeably, distractingly amazing doesn’t really strike me as the most professional thing in a conservative office, either. That kind of doe-eyed look seems rather “I’m not a lawyer, I just play one on TV” to me.

    • I think you’re misconstruing the post; nothing in it says that makeup is mandatory. If you don’t like wearing makeup, that’s fine. However, I feel more put-together if I’m wearing mascara. Even if I’m just going to the store to buy milk, I’ll take 30 seconds to swipe some on. It’s just a personal decision. Certainly, nobody is putting a gun to my head an forcing me to wear it.

    • I read that comment as you wake up just ready to go. No extra primping necessary. Kind of like if I could wake up without needing my cup of coffee because somehow I already had it. Obviously, you can opt to go through life without makeup (or without coffee), but I don’t think the comment meant “you must look great before going to Starbucks” …

    • We all have our own ideas about how much we need to primp before we can be seen.

      But Hiatus, I’m with you. I wear makeup when I’m in trial or going on a date. Not every day. Certainly not when I’m running out on one errand in the morning.

  32. This is something I would totally do if I were Kim Kardashian (maybe she already does this?!?!?) but I’m not so I’ll stick to mascara and eyeliner. Way too expensive. Its only worth it if you want that glamorous/NBA wife lifestyle.

    • That was my first thought when reading this. THAT is how Kim Kardashian has such long lashes. I seriously did not know you could get lash extensions besides the ones you apply one time. They don’t always have make-up on but, they do have amazing lashes. The mom does too, so I thought it was in the genes.

      My waxer uses Latisse, has brown eyes and it looks great. She’s never had problems with it.

      Interesting topic. I learned something today.

  33. anonx1000 :

    one of the partners in my office got lash extensions recently, and I know where she goes and thus how much it cost, and every time I notice them now I think I am not getting paid enough.

  34. The Bad Wife :

    Confused as to why you can’t just do DIY fake eyelashes? Presumably they would take a while to master but they could be done once a month?

  35. I love the way your eyelashes look~! and wanted to share another method I use that creates beautiful eyelashes for less.

    I am hooked on long full lashes and curlers and the best eyelash curler I have ever found is the Hot Lashes eyelash curler, makeup Artist kit.

    I read the reviews on Amazon and was impressed. They also have a site of the same name Hot Lashes. I love sharing about great products. This curler is exactly like the Shu Uemura curler with a 24k gold plated curler and this small heater base. Keeps my lashes curling and curled till the next day. hth~

  36. Lash extensions done by a licensed esthetician can be either dramatic or just “more you.” There is no pain. Glue allergies are extremely rare. Yes, it’s expensive and yes, you can get addicted to them. Not true that you can’t get them wet – just wait 24 hours after application. And NEVER go to one of those places that say they will charge $25 for extensions in 15 minutes. Their techniques are totally unsafe!

  37. Another time saving idea is brow resurrection and semi- permanent eye liner. Both available at
    These are the much improved version of the tattoos of years past, after the first couple of days when they do look ‘strong’, you will have natural looking brows and eye liner right out of bed. They last for about 2 years so more time efficient than lash extensions.
    Only tried the salons in Singapore but they have a salon in ZnYC now.

  38. Lashologist Council of America :

    If you’re thinking about eyelashj extensions:
    Signs of incorrectly applied Eyelash Extensions:

    1.Mascara residue on eyelashes will compromise the contact area between eyelashes and fake eyelashes.
    2.Fake eyelashes applied to curly or perm lashes will not adhere properly. Fake eyelashes should be used on straight lashes.
    3.Actual eyelashes naturally fall of due to lashes life cycle.
    4.Poor technique. Inadequate lash bonding.
    5.Lashes were in contact with water within 2 hrs after fake eyelashes application. Rubbing eyes, facial steaming or taking a steam bath is not recommended within 2 days of process.
    Lashes need to be straight for a successful fake eyelash application. Do not perm eyelashes prior to fake eyelashes procedure; curly lashes are difficult to perfect bonding.

    What to do?

    1.Mascara on eyelashes should be completely removed before eyelash extensions are applied.
    2.As a rule of thumb, fake eyelash should be 1/2 to 1/3 longer than client’s own lashes. Any requests for longer lashes should be carefully considered as the application may fail.
    3.Proper bonding is the secret to successful fake eyelashes extensions. Any separation between the fake eyelashes and the client’s eyelash will compromise the bond and the effects will be short-lived.
    4.During fake eyelashes application, if client tears for any reason (i.e. falling asleep); wipe tears away with soft cotton swabs immediately.
    5.Use the eyelash comb to smooth eyelashes after the application is complete to make sure that no lashes are sticking together. Examine all fake eyelashes to make sure bonding is secure.
    6.After care; 2 hrs after eyelashes extension treatment – Do not allow water to contact lashes. 2 days after eyelashes extension – Do not steam face, use steam bath, swim or wash face with hot water. Do not use mascara on fake eyelashes, as make-up remover will affect the bonding of fake eyelashes. Do not perm fake eyelashes. Do not use a lash curler, as it will break both fake eyelashes and natural lashes. Do not rub eyes or fake eyelashes when washing face. Always pat dry lashes after cleansing.
    7.Maintenance: The lash life cycle is about 100 days. Fake eyelashes may fall off due to the natural lashes life cycle or because of poor technique or negligent care by client. It is recommended a retouch every 3 to 4 weeks to maintain best look.

  39. I’ve worn short dark brown individual lashes for years since my own are very short and thin. After having them applied professionally for several years, I learned to do them on my own and never looked back. No one notices (on a trip I mentioned to a group of close longtime friends once that I HAD to find a place to buy glue and they were incredulous – they had no idea), but I DO have visible eyelashes framing my eyes and can get by, during the day in particular, with no other eye makeup (something I could never leave the house without in the past, even when I was years younger. It’s not a matter of sheer vanity – I look like a zombie without eyeliner and shadow to set my eyes back in my head! The extra lashes look normal and make me feel confident.) And, no, they’re not expensive – one only needs to have them applied professionally (not anywhere near $250) or learn to apply then properly and sparingly one’s self. Worth a shot.

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