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I have always loved a bright green bag. It's a fun, unexpected, bold choice with a ton of outfits — especially if your base outfit is generally neutrals. I also find green hard to work into my wardrobe otherwise: when I've had green shoes I haven't loved the way my legs looked against the green, and when I've worn green blouses or sweaters they often feel a bit too bright for my pale skin.
My solution: the bright green bag! I'm drooling over this one from See by Chloe — but it also comes in a bunch of other more neutral tones at both Bloomingdale's and Nordstrom.
It's 8.5″W x 2.25″D x 6.2″H, and is for $495. This similar bag looks to be slightly larger if you'd prefer that.
Hunting for something more affordable? This vegan brand has a ton of bright green bags right now.
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Sales of note for 8.30.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
- Boden – 20% off
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
- Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale
Sales of note for 8.30.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
- Boden – 20% off
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
- Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
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- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
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- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Anon
I am a bit older then my co-workers, who have only held jobs as adults since the pandemic. They are now wanting to take off every Friday in the summer for weddings / bachelorette parties. And by “wanting to,” it seems that they have just planned all this and not considered how it affects staffing, etc. From how the past holiday times have worked, when they say “working remotely,” they are often actively traveling or doing their vacation, vs the “working” part of remote work. Ugh. And I guess they expected that I have nothing to do all summer but work and never travel??? Like these are jobs — you do have to do them (even if remote). And I am the bad guy for using my words now while it’s still early in the year?
Anon
I’m not clear what your role in this is. Are you the coworker left behind and unable to take vacation because then there won’t be coverage? If you’re unable to use your own vacation time, absolutely speak up and say what days you want off. But otherwise I think you kind of mind your own business.
Fwiw, I’m almost 40 and it’s not uncommon in my industry with generous vacation leave for people to take off every Friday in the summer. It’s not a Gen Z thing IMO. And post-pandemic there are definitely times I’m “working remotely” without a whole lot of work happening. I view it as the price my employer pays for taking away my office and forcing me to work out of my house with no boundary between home and work.
Anon
Are you their boss? If not, don’t try to tell them what to do but also don’t cover their work. If it is impacting your ability to get work done, talk to your boss
Anonymous
Why are you being a drama Queen? Do they have vacation days to take? Do you? If you want to take vacation, do it. If too many people are out on a given day, deny requests. If people are claiming they are working remotely but aren’t productive or responsive, have a conversation with them. If you’re a manager, this is your job. Do the work. If you aren’t their manager, get your requests in and move on.
Anonymous
youre not the bad guy – your coworkers are just young and immature, which is expected given their inexperience. Do you have a boss that you could bring this up to? That coworkers taking off every Friday is massively impacting your workflow?
Anon
Her coworkers aren’t being immature by using their vacation time.
KJ
New reality. It’s an employees’ market.
Anon
Not really. And given the recession forecasts, not for long. People are making some track records for themselves (e.g., we were open on Good Friday. Except some co-workers who were supposed to be on-site informed people the day before that they’d be working remotely on Friday. Except they were travelling then and then got a bit huffy that they were missing a planned activity (not church; more like drinks before going out). For coverage, when a person is already out, others can’t also be out. I get that some WFH is unexpected (sick kid, car trouble) but this is really not cool — almost doing a vacation at your co-workers who are busy picking up your slack.
Anon
Exactly this. Savvy employers also know that between giving the slackers the boot or losing overworked, solid employees, it’s better to boot the slackers. Whether or not they can replace the slackers, they sure as hell can’t replace the good ones.
No Face
What type of work do you do? Can you cover them on Fridays and enjoy some three day weekends where you take Monday off?
At my firm, the hourly staff are divided into two groups. Each group ends early every other Friday in the summer. It is a huge morale booster, the work gets done, and the firm is more profitable than ever. Staff just switch Fridays for weddings and whatnot. If there is an actual emergency on Fridays afternoon someone is there, but I normally try to avoid that so I can have a life.
Anon
I love this solution.
Anon
Is distributing vacation days to take long weekends really more disruptive than saving up days and taking off a week or two at once?
Anon
No.
Anon
I don’t think that new workers get that not everyone can take off at once and that you have to have coverage within each group. Also, I think that managers haven’t managed new workers much, if at all, since 2019 and some chickens are coming home to roost now that all postponed weddings and travel are itching to happen. You have to take turns. And because no one had to ask to be out of the office before (and TBH no one expected new hires to be helpful but now those new hires are 2+ years in an expected to pull at least some of their weight).
Anon
It’s the job of the boss to manage coverage, not employees. If you’re OP and you’re their boss than YOU need to do something.
Ribena
Not every team is like that though. My boss has said she almost prefers for all of us to be off at once vs one or two per week for multiple weeks in a row, because we are collaborative rather than a coverage team. Not these colleagues’ faults if no one has explained the expectations.
I was in a similar boat last autumn when I had a direct report who hadn’t had an office job before the pandemic and I essentially said “as long as our boss is fine with you taking leave, and you give enough notice and ensure your work is on track, that’s fine, but I won’t be impressed if you tell me on on Thursday you need the next Wednesday off unless there’s a good reason you couldn’t plan further ahead”
Anonymous
If you are their supervisor, I would tell the staff they need to take vacation days if they are not working and proactively review upcoming vacation time to ensure adequate staffing levels. If your company is hiring recent graduates it needs to do some basic management and setting expectations or procedures for vacation time and work coverage.
Cat
ok these are two separate problems – too many staff being out on the same day, and staff abusing “remote working.” Don’t conflate them. If your workload will suffer because these people are out, bring it up to your manager. If you ARE the manager of these people… manage them.
Anon
Sounds like they are taking their vacation time when they want to take it. Older generations, including myself, still have that work work work mentality and I’ve often lost vacation days at the end of the year. If employees can’t get their work done while taking their allotted vacation days (assuming no industry crunch time), then it’s an employer problem.
Anonymous
So I’m not a fan of the “remote work” where someone isn’t actually working (i.e., I’m flying to a bachelorette and drinking on the plane, but it’s Friday and my out of office isn’t on, so I’ll flip things to others to deal with type situation), but if they have time off to take? Sorry, they get to do that.
Anon
We had someone say they’d be remote working from Paris over xmas and then whined that she was in Paris and working on EST was such a drag to her and her BF and why were we ruining her time there??? Because she said she was WORKING remotely. [Had she asked for vacation then, she would have been denied as we had a quarter-end bunch of drama to get through.]
Anon
Yeah, I have no sympathy for the people who are “working remotely wink-wink” when they’re really somewhere else and just hoping no one calls them. I WFH full time and if I need time off where I don’t want to be bothered answering calls or emails, I take PTO. If I’m scheduled to work, I won’t say I sit in my office 100% of the day (sometimes I do run to the grocery store, pharmacy, or go get a haircut) but I stay on “green” in Teams and if someone calls or emails, I respond. Even if it’s just to say “give me 5 minutes” and then I call from the car. We have a staff member who takes almost all of her PTO on Fridays and then isn’t really available most other Fridays…she’s on “Away” status most of the day. She’s functionally working a 4-day-a-week schedule. Which I would love to do, personally, but as OP says, someone has to provide coverage, especially because our execs get cranky if they need something and they can’t get anyone to answer their phone.
Anonymous
100% this is me. I have WFH full time for six years, and there’s nothing “wink wink” about it. I take PTO when I need to, and I take LOADS of Fridays off. But I also get a ton of vacation time and our office doesn’t require coverage the way the OP’s seems to. I’m older, too, so this isn’t a millennial/Gen Z thing.
Anon
FWIW, when I worked at KPMG, we closed early every summer Friday afternoon for just this reason.
Anon
I know someone there (or another B4) that also said they closed their office completely for a week. OTOH, they work it back out of of them . . .
Anon
This is becoming more common. I love it.
Anon
If they’re your direct reports, you can deny the requested PTO days based on a seniority system.
If they’re not, make your own summer plans, do not pick up their work, and let your manager deal with it.
Anon
I mean what do you expect? People to skip their friends’ weddings to provide coverage?
Anon
Aren’t weddings on Saturdays? I get that you want to fly out the day before, but if you are on the airport TH afternoon and hung over on F and going to the spa on F and then have plans for drinks, that is really a vacation. And if someone has already pulled the vacation card for then, that is not cool to the rest of your co-workers who now aren’t able to do any of that in their home city. The weekend is the weekend, except when it also during the week.
I work on a Teacup production line with a 4-person staff; 2 are problems but we don’t get to review them, just grumble.
Anon
About a third of the weddings I go to are on Fridays (originally scheduled on Fridays, not Covid rescheduling), and with Covid rescheduling there are some on Thursday’s and Sundays now.
I fully agree, if you are not working then you should take a vacation day. The people “working” when remote ruin hybrid for all of us. And I think younger people (younger than me, I’m 28) aren’t great at recognizing when they need to take off vs work remotely.
But on the flip side, if my friend’s wedding is on a Friday and my PTO request is denied I will be quickly looking for a new job.
No Face
Your last paragraph is exactly right, especially as many people have been isolated from their personal relationships for years.
My mom’s request for PTO to go to my college graduation was denied. Guess what? She quit, they didn’t have any coverage, and she found another job after a bout of unemployment. That’s the real risk here.
Anon
As an essential worker, there are plenty of times when PTO is denied. However, if it was an extenuating circumstance or a major event (wedding/funeral/graduation/sick relative/what have you) exceptions were always made
Anon
You sound massively out of touch with how offices work. Taking vacation is not a terrible thing, and your coworkers are not taking their vacations AT you. If you have a problem, it’s with how the management of your company deals with this, not with your coworkers.
Anon
Agreed. Kind of feels like OP wrote this AAM letter too
https://www.askamanager.org/2016/07/my-best-employee-quit-on-the-spot-because-i-wouldnt-let-her-go-to-her-college-graduation.html
Anon
IDK — I get a lot of “Would it be OK if I work out of the NYC office for a week” and then they are just there for a vacation and I guess consider themselves on-call at best and annoyed if you e-mail them a task. If you are on vacation, you can put it on my calendar as such and I promise not to reach out. But I’m a slightly-up-the-food-chain co-worker and when it’s an underling task, I need you to do it if I send it to you. But I’ve had days when everyone has ghosted me and no one has filled out the “I’m on vacation” notification system they are supposed to use (after being told to, repeatedly).
Anon
OP would be excoriated at AAM, it would be pretty entertaining.
Anon
My industry has summer Fridays. Maybe yours should look into it. How much freaking work gets done on a Friday afternoon in July anyway?
Anon
Yeah, it’s not your coworkers’ fault that they’re playing by the rules. You sound whiny and jealous and have totally misplaced your frustration. Talk to your boss if it’s causing problems for you, don’t b ch about it on the internet.
Anon
Does it really affect you all that much? I doubt it. Mind your own business and maybe get a life where you take Fridays off too.
Anonymous
I try to eliminate Friday deadlines from my life. Idk why people seem to love Friday deadlines (I’m a litigator) but they’re miserable – everyone procrastinates until the end of the week then it’s a huge rush to get stuff done when people are wrangling other deadlines or checked out for the weekend. If you have any control over the calendar at all, or if you can influence the person who does, push hard to eliminate Friday or Monday deadlines period but especially over the summer.
I would also want to have a team meeting about how to handle coverage over the summer. Everyone takes summer vacation. Everyone has a ton of events this summer. You need rules about how many people need to actually be available meaning in front of their computer for 8 hours that day. If you’re their manager then you can set this up and if not then you can talk to your manager about it. I think a lot of teams are going to have this problem this summer and it makes sense to be proactive about it.
ANony
Why don’t you do the same?
Anonymous
So people don’t need to work anymore? Shortages and other issues will never get better if people all decide that we don’t work.
Anon
Most office jobs honestly aren’t that important. It doesn’t sound from the OP’s post like she’s a cancer surgeon or an airline pilot. I really, really doubt society would collapse if everyone in her office was out on summer Fridays. Also no one is really productive for 40+ hours per week. There are studies that a shortened workweek makes people more productive on the days they do work, so the net hours may not even be much less.
Anon
How do those boots taste?
Tuck in?
Reposting from earlier:
Hello ladies! I’m a pear shape and have a short waist. I only buy blouses that don’t need to be tucked in because I think it looks bad on my by emphasizing my lower half. This really limits what blouses I can buy, or I buy longer blouses and have them tailored. Maybe it’s time to re-think the whole approach. Does anyone else deal with this issue? How do you handle it? Is it all in my head and I should just start tucking blouses in?? Thank you
Anon
IMO if you wear a blazer, no one much notices what is going on underneath it.
anon
I know what you mean, but I also think it’s mostly in your head? I’m also a pear, and I’ve never altered blouses. I either buy the ones you’re describing, or I tuck them in.
No Face
I never tuck. I don’t really know how that would change the blouses I would buy either.
Anon B
I’m also a pear with similar issues. When I want to look very trim with a tucked in collared shirt, I’ve resorted to shirt braces, sometimes called shirt stays. They’re marketed to men, I bought them on Amazon, and they work like a charm. The downside is that they only really work with loose pants, but my do they work!
Anonymous
I always tuck, otherwise my waist looks larger than it is.
Elle
I’m also a pear, but I always tuck and wear higher waisted pants. If I leave my shirts untucked I feel like it makes my waist look larger than it is.
anon8
I’m an apple shape and carry weight in my belly. I hate tucking so I just don’t do it. I’m also short and short waisted and any pants are like high rise pants on me so tucking looks especially weird.
I say try and see if you like it. If it doesn’t work for you, go back to not tucking.
Anonymous
Hourglass with short waist here. For me, leaning into the sailor aesthetics has worked. High waist – actual high waist – and tucked in top. I wear high waist and wide trousers, and tucked streamlined top that balances my woohoo! bust. For a pear, elaborate and interesting sleeves is a better match.
Anonymous
Don’t hide your waist.
Tuck, and emphasize your shoulders!!
Anonymous
+1 <3
Anonymous
I was traveling with my boyfriend the last 10 days and am so happy to be home with my cats. I honestly love my cats more than my boyfriend, who is wonderful (…but not a cat, I guess). I never understood irrational people who love pets so much until I got these two!!
Anon
That seems like not a great sign for the relationship.
Anon
There is such thing as too much togetherness. 10 days is a long time to be around someone non-stop even if you live together, since there’s ordinarily jobs, hobbies, etc taking up most of the day apart. I like my person very much and I also like my alone time. There’s good reason a lot of marriages are strained when both partners retire at the same time.
Anon
I feel like vacations should be fun togetherness and if it’s not that’s not a good sign. It’s not like you’re bored and sitting at home doing nothing on a vacation. But I’ve been around my husband almost 24/7 for the last two years, so 10 days seems like nothing to me.
Anon
I love my husband very much and I also want alone time when we get home from a 10 day trip.
Anonymous
Nope. There are people very different to you. 24/7 is a nightmare.
Anon
Unless he also loves the cats more than he loves her!
Anonymous
Yup. I commented on the earlier thread that I have tons of vacation. But I no longer want to travel just stay home with cat.
Anonymous
I feel you. My kitties are the best, humans are fine but the kitties make my heart whole. (I even call my one kitty my ‘main man’ haha and I have a husband)
Anonymous
I have a husband and a dog. Guess which one never snores, never wants me to listen to them talk, and doesn’t constantly demand to snuggle (see thread below)?
Walnut
I was bewildered reading this because my Great Dane snores, lives more my doting attention and snuggling is their full time job.
Anon
In my case, both do all those things.
anon8
I didn’t have pets growing up and never understood how people could be so obsessed with animals. Now I have five cats and there’s no turning back.
Anonymous
I have 2 cats and a dog, and I sleep with 1 cat and the dog. I miss them when sleeping anywhere else.
Anonymous
I mean my cat was here first, I lived with him for like 15 years before I even met my husband. Of course I miss him when I’m away from him. (I also miss my husband when we’re apart, but at least I can talk to him).
Anon
I’m out of inspiration. What’s your favorite recipe involving a pound of ground beef?
I have already vetoed tacos, hamburgers and goulash (american)
Anon
Sloppy Joes
Picadillo
Chili + macaroni + health coating of shredded cheese
Anon
oh your last suggestion is goulash! I’m sick of it! But sloppy joes could work…
Anonymous
1. That is what American goulash is?
2. People eat that?
pugsnbourbon
Lol come to Cincinnati, we put chili on spaghetti and btw it’s actually Greek food!
Anonymous
I never heard it called goulash. It’s chili mac.
Anon
American goulash is basically hamburger helper without the helper. Ground beef in a tomatoey sauce mixed up with elbow macaroni and cheese.
Anon
American goulash – also called chili mac – varies widely by cook. My version doesn’t have cheese and does have tomatoes and peppers and mushrooms.
Anon
I don’t know American goulash, but I grew up eating slumgullion (ground beef, lots of green bell peppers, hot sauce, and cheddar cheese over elbow macaroni). I had to look up how to spell it since I’ve only ever head it aloud, as in “we’re having slumgullion for dinner.”
Anonymous
We call it “American chop suey” in MA. Very common school lunch meal, at least when I was in school.
Anon
Meatballs or kofta?
Shepherd’s pie?
Curry?
Italian wedding soup?
My actual favorite is just plain old vegetable beef soup, more or less Campbell’s style.
Betsy
Egg roll bowls – technically I like them better with ground pork, but they work just fine with ground beef.
Anon
Some type of creamy pasta dish, hamburger helper type meal. Quesadilla?
PolyD
Americanized pastitsio? Stuffed peppers (in which I generally flavor the meat a bit like pastitsio)?
Anne-on
Texas style chili ideally served with either fritos, taco chips, or biscuits on the side. Hands down favorite in my house would be sphagetti with meat sauce (Tomato sauce with ground beef instead of meatballs). I’ve also done bahn mi (ish) rolls with beef meatballs instead of pork meatballs and they were yummy!
Flats Only
Hamburger Helper. Deluxe Cheeseburger flavor. Topped once done with shredded cheddar, chopped onions and dill pickle relish. Yum!
Anon
Half Baked Harvest Hamburger helper! SOOO good and homemade so it doesn’t taste quite as processed (although I am totally not a snob and will also make boxed hamburger helper as a comfort meal!)
AIMS
The cornbread tamale pie recipe from the NYT is both easy and delicious & calls for exactly 1 lb ground beef.
Other ideas: Shepherds pie, meatballs, or stuffed peppers.
anon8
Korean beef bowls
Kheema
recipes
+1
Korean beef bowls/beef bulgogi -ish are so fast and tasty.
Diana Barry
Red sauce (‘quick’ bolognese) with a bunch of onions, garlic, then add the beef, cook until mostly done, add 28 oz tomatoes, and whatever Italian herbs you can find, and a little sugar, simmer for as long as you have. If you have carrots, celery, and a food processor I’d throw a couple of those in with the onions.
Anon 2.0
Pasta fagoli soup
AnonATL
Beef stroganoff with cream of mushroom soup and egg noodles.
Anonymous
Bolognese
Fried mince for Thai/Vietnamese
Chili
Meatbslls
Beef moussaka
MagicUnicorn
Lasagna.
Anon
Meat fatayer. I never have the time/patience to make my own dough, so I either use Trader Joe’s pre-made pizza dough or honestly in a pinch I’ll use canned biscuit dough that I roll thinner. This recipe just uses cinnamon and pine nuts, but sometimes I just throw in some 7-spice or Zaatar to call it good enough.
https://cosetteskitchen.com/lebanese-fatayer
Quickly brown meat with some onions. Add spices. Cook until on the dryer side, then set aside to cool.
Roll out the dough into thin corn tortilla sized circles.
Pile one half of the dough with meat mixture, fold over and pinch the edges.
Brush with oil and bake for ~15 min.
Anon
Does anyone have a dog who is just not affectionate? We got a rescue dog (but he was very young, likely neglected vs abused). He likes to be around us (like near us), but never next to us and he is not a snuggler. He is interested in you if you have food. I’m always going up to him and cuddling. I guess I thought at some point he’d be more interactive? He likes to hike and likes his dog friends and never comes up to a person unless they have a treat for him.
He is a mutt. We suspect some lifestock guardian dog but maybe some golden (and they seem very friendly). Maybe he’s just not a snuggler? I feel like I have done something wrong and this is my first dog.
Mrs. Jones
I’ve had dogs that like to snuggle and dogs that don’t. So I think it’s just the dog’s personality and not your fault.
AnonQ
Many dogs just don’t like to snuggle. It’s nothing you did, just a personality thing. I was surprised by this too when I first got a dog, but after talking to lots of other dog owners found out it is pretty common, especially among herding/guardian breeds. It’s their nature to be solitary given those jobs.
Anonymous
My last dog who we had from 6 weeks on (so while a mutt/rescue, we had him literally his whole life) was not a snuggler. Like at all. He would be ok with brief petting, but honestly didn’t really care for it either. He was sweet as could be, gentle, and wonderful, but not cuddly. It’s like how some people aren’t huggers. It’s just a personality, not a defect.
Anon
Yep, dogs have personalities just like people do. Some are affectionate, some aren’t. Particularly if he’s got a lot of working livestock breed in him, then he’s bred to be independent because he needs to think quickly to manage the herd. He’s not a companion dog, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t a companion.
Anon
Probably just a combination of his personality and his past. If he was neglected, he’s not used to a lot of human interaction/touch. Some dogs are snugglers, some are not (just as some people are huggers and some are not)
Anon
Neither of you are doing the dog thing wrong. Just like us, dogs are individuals and have their own preferences. Sounds like he’s comfortable and relaxed – that’s the important thing.
Anonymous
My rescue dog is likely a mix of Golden and Akbash Dog, a livestock guardian breed. (Side note: Is yours a Turkey dog too?) She behaves very similarly–she likes to be near us but not right next to us, and does not like to snuggle. She does like to be petted, though, and will paw you for more if you stop. I like her style because it matches mine–I feel affection but don’t like to cuddle.
Anne-on
Ours is a lab and same thing. I think working dogs are very people-oriented and want to BE with us, but not be snuggled/hugged like babies. My cat on the other hand views us as walking space heaters and never misses the opportunity to curl up in a lap.
Anon
I’ve had my dog since she was eight weeks. She’s not a snuggler! Very interested in food though! She’s cuddliest in the morning, which still isn’t much, and then after that prefers if you let her be. She’ll sit on the other end of the sofa, or wants to be in the room with you, but just not touching. We joke that she’s a cat.
Anon
YES — my dog is at the far end of the sofa. WTF how do I have an 80-pound cat???
Anonymous
I see your 80-lb cat and raise you one 80-lb cat that thinks it’s a human.
Anon
Confession, ours is a Cavapoo (Cavalier + Poodle mix) so we call her a Catapoo and we think we’re hilarious!
Anne-on
Same here. Our cat is the cuddly one when she wants to be (as per all cats everywhere, sometimes she just wants to be left alone). Our lab is the one who is always happy to see you, seeks out people, wants to play, wants to go on a walk/car ride/etc. but is firmly against cuddles and HATES being hugged (will not bite/growl, but tries to escape from being held or confined in any way).
Anonymous
I don’t think many dogs actually like to be hugged. The snuggly ones mostly want to sit right up against you or in your lap, depending on size.
Anon
My cat sees your dog and raises him one arched eyebrow.
Anon
I’m a cat person, not a dog person, but there are definitely levels of snugglers throughout both species. I’ve had some that just don’t want to be around people, some want to be near you but not be touched, some like being stroked but not being picked up, some are basically living blankets I can grab and drape anywhere on myself.
One of our current cats is definitely running dog software. He likes walks, chewing on everything, and playing fetch.
anon
Most of our rescues have been like this . They like to observe humans and be near their human, but not particularly sold on pets and cuddles. Some have gotten more affectionate over the years – but even the one I’m thinking off, still just likes to sit next to my mom. Not be pet, just sit on the sofa while she drinks her coffee. It’s nothing you are doing wrong – it is the dog’s personality. Also, trust me, the slightly distant but happy dog is way easier to deal with than a 70 lbs OMG I NEED TO BE NEXT TO YOU, HI MOM, HI MOM, PET ME, THROW MY TOY dog.
Anonymous
+1 million to your last sentence. When we adopted our current dog I was specifically looking for one that did not require constant attention. A previous dog had separation anxiety and it was exhausting. She couldn’t even go out in the yard to use the bathroom by herself.
Anon
My rescue dog played a good adoption game – he leaned into our legs and looked up at us with soulful eyes and wanted to leave with us the minute we met him.
Now that he’s ours, he’s like “ho hum, you people again” but if a stranger comes over, he pulls the whole adoption act again. I thought he was going to go home with the UPS driver just yesterday (some watchdog!)
Anon
One of my late, great dogs actually would jump in the postal service truck as soon as it pulled up. On more than one occasion, she was later my “special delivery package” when the mail carrier realized she had hitch hiked a ride.
Anon
Please don’t give my dog any ideas!!
Anon
Check out the UPSDogs page on Facebook :-)
Vicky Austin
Personality plays a huge role. I think near you is snuggling as far as your dog is concerned. I don’t think you’ve done anything wrong if he likes being near you.
AIMS
My dog (terrier) isn’t a snuggler. He likes to be near us and is sad if we’re gone but he just isn’t the kind to sit with his head in your lap (he’ll sit near you and sleeps near us but again wouldn’t just climb into bed, which is great). We’ve had him since he was a puppy so it’s not abuse or neglect. Maybe it’s that we didn’t force it on him? But I honestly don’t worry about it. My chief complaint about dogs is they can be too needy so he suits our family perfectly. I don’t think you’re doing anything wrong.
Anon
My Great Dane likes to be near his humans, but not touching except maybe his chin on my feet. If I try to cuddle him (because i think it’s hilarious to spoon him – i’m five feet tall and he’s longer than i am) he moves away and looks at me like, why are you touching me??
Anon
My newest “never thought of that” reason to be thankful for working remotely…I did that middle age thing where I hurt myself sleeping, and today I cannot turn my neck at all. If I still had to go to the office, I would have had to burn a PTO day, since I can’t safely operate a car like this.
Anne-on
Omg SAME. I woke up with the worst stiff neck and I’ve been suffering all day.
Anonymous
This used to happen to me frequently when I was commuting 60 minutes each way to law school. The only way I could drive was to wear a Thermacare heat patch.
Anon
I got sick last week and it was one of those things where if I’d had to marshal my resources to shower, get dressed, drive to work, and sit in an office/go to meetings in person, I would have had to take PTO for two, maybe 3 days. Since I WFH, I just took some DayQuil, stayed in my PJs, drank allll the hot tea and got work done. Much preferred.
Anonymous
And you didn’t share your germs with your co-workers!
Anon
If you do this occasionally, consider investing in one of those cloth covered gel wraps that velcro around the neck. These can go into either the freezer of the microwave, depending on where you are in your treatment cycle. They do their magic while you are working on your computer.
Anon
Ugh I hurt my upper back sleeping 2 nights ago! Like… just how?!
Anon
I have a migraine. I had to take a 45 minute break from screens to get through the aura (visual distrurbance.) It is so nice to be at home and be able to go into a darker room to wait it out.
Anonymous
Oh no! I did that last week. Salonpas really help! Or try a heating pad. Feel better!
Anonymous
Thoughts on See by Chloe? I love Chloe but I thought See by was supposed to be their less expensive version? $500 for a small bag is still a pretty big price tag and isn’t that much less than regular Chloe. What’s the deal?
kitten
I agree, this bag is giving budget Chloe Marcie. If I wanted a bag like this I’d just pay the extra for the Chloe. However the comparable size Marcie is $990 so I get that for some people it might be a big enough price difference to affect their decision.
Anon
Agree that the price drop isn’t significant enough to warrant the buy.
Also, I’m very over plastic purses and shoes being called “vegan”.
AZCPA
The bags themselves are very nice and good quality, just not Chloe level. The price point is pretty different (See runs half price or less of similar Chloe bags), but still not cheap.
Anonymous
Hopefully an easy question – any place where you all have found suit jackets/blazers? I was a full suit wearing person before the pandemic but now my work is going way more casual – like even jeans will be ok when we return. I however don’t feel fully “at work” without a jacket but realize a suit is too much. So I’m thinking of buying a few jackets that work with casual slacks and dark jeans. Places like Uniqlo all have the linen type jackets which seem like sweaters to me – like too unstructured. Yet I’m also not looking for a $300 suit jacket. Just a run of the mill in between thing possibly with a lining as I think that gives jackets structure.
AIMS
The last few times I was at my local TJ Maxx they had a lot of Veronica Beard blazers for around $149. They would look nice with jeans.
I would look around places like that, Nordstrom Rack, Saks off Fifth, etc.
AIMS
Also look at Talbots. Lots of options.
Anonymous
Where are these TJ Maxxes that have actual good stuff? All of the ones I’ve ever visited were like Stein Mart.
AIMS
NYC. The one at 90-something and Columbus is really good, also 6th and 19th and to a lesser degree 59th-ish and 1st.
Anon
Talbots mostly. For a while I liked tweed-ish type fauxChanel jackets from Chico’s (don’t laugh, they used to have some good ones) but so many retailers have veered away from business wear, it’s pretty much down to Talbots for me.
Anon
My best blazer finds have been at Goodwill on the fancy side of town.
Anonymous
Ann Taylor has some cute ones right now. Talbots is always reliable.
Anonymous
For those of you who have worked for both large and small employers, can you give me some PROS of small employers? An opportunity may be presenting itself that could move my resume in the direction I want to go, yet it’s a 30 person company that is 5 years old. Looking at this having been in NYC biglaw and government all I can think is – omg pay is going to be low; benefits will be terrible/non existent.
Intellectually though I understand that if I want to go in this direction, it’ll have to be a small company bc MBB has no reason to come calling here [nor do I want that]. What I know of the company so far – senior leadership at the MD level all appears to be from Big 4 or similar companies where they were partners for 20 or so years [which makes me think – would they really take a job with awful pay or benefits]; I too would be in the running for a senior role though not MD level; they’ve always run a remote workplace even before the pandemic. HQ is Chicago though I’m unsure of what office space they keep there; looks like maybe 10 people max are in Chicago though and the rest are in NY/Ca/now the southeast where I am; so I assume you travel back to Chicago or maybe client side every so often.
What does the hive think? Can something like this ever be good or is this the type of thing where you’ll regret giving up your good health insurance and 401k match? FWIW salary and esp benefits are really important to me as I’m long term single in my 40s so I can’t just jump on a spouse’s health insurance + have some health issues which while ok do require specialists/testing etc. so I’m not someone who can say oh yeah I last went to the dr. 8 years ago who cares if insurance is bad.
Anonymous
Stick with good health insurance and benefits, especially given age and single status, I’m somewhere small right now and even though I love my boss and my coworkers and the work I get to do and good title and less politics—I still would trade it in a heartbeat (and soon will) for decent insurance. I’m on Cobra right now from prior big employer because it was the better option. And buying on my own isn’tt reasonable (not only cost but individual doesn’t give you the same appeal rights a group plan does in my state—I have cancer so was so grateful to still be on Cobra). From networking to training opportunities to salary to advancement opportunities to better coverage when you take a day off to salary to performance judgment if you’re a high performer, bigger is better. Less chance of the company going under, too.
Anonymous
For those that have been flying regularly through the pandemic/recently – is it no longer a thing where you can “time” flights in such a way that you get slightly emptier planes because every flight is 100% full? I was a frequent business traveler in before times and without a doubt Sunday night/Monday morning and Thursday late afternoon/evening flights were pretty much always business travelers esp in and out of major cities. And then in contrast all day Friday/Saturday was more families/vacationers. And Tuesday/Wed. were often the times where you’d get on flights that’d only be 80% full. Is this not a thing anymore at all? And for cities where there were many routes a day almost hourly – think LGA or DCA to Chicago – you could frequently get on the 2nd or 3rd flight of the day say at 10 am and find it empty-ish because those who were doing a day trip for business left on the 7 am flight and not to many others are flying to Chicago to vacation at 11 am on a Tuesday. Is this just not a thing anymore because of fewer flights in combo with 2019 level demand? I’m certainly not looking for an empty plane anyplace but to me a plane that’s even 10-20% empty just feels less packed – that was true pre pandemic and certainly even more now.
Anon
Flights are slammed to the point that if your flight is cancelled, which has also been happening a lot lately, getting on the next one to your city with availability might not be until 2 days later.
Anon
This was often true pre-pandemic. I honestly haven’t observed a huge difference now vs 2019. Flights were always full then.
Cat
I and a few others responded to this in the morning post since it was in m-d for a long time in yesterday’s PM thread, but the short answer is, you may get lucky with a handful of empty seats around, but that’s not “time-able.”
Anon
I used to be an avid runner, but I’ve been having some knee issues so I switched to walking. Is walking five miles as good for me as running the same five miles? I don’t get that runners’ high, but I guess it’s the same thing…
Anonymous
It’s better for you if it isn’t trashing your knee
Anon
I don’t think the cardiac benefits are as good as running since you’re not getting your heart rate up. But it’s certainly still exercise!
Anon
The calorie burn per mile is basically the same I think. I think running has more cardiovascular benefits, but walking definitely does a lot of good for your body. I’ve always hated running but since WFH have become a regular 3-5 mile walker and feel a lot healthier than I did before I started walking so much.
Anne-on
I haven’t gone back yet, but I used to do OrangeTheory 3 days a week, and every trainer over the age of about 30 said they now walked (quickly, at a high incline) instead of running because of the wear and tear being a trainer put on their body. My legs/behind never looked better than when I was walking on an 8-10% incline at about 4mph for 20 minutes. It really is a killer workout – the life long runners would all be shocked at how hard it is to walk quickly(ish) at a 12-15% incline when we did specific hill climb walking workouts!
Anon
Yep, movement is movement. Adopt the ultrarunner’s mantra of keep moving forward.
anon
+1
Anon
I’m dealing with a variety of annoying and stressful family, friend, and work issues that are too involved to share with a friend and too complicated to address or fix. Nothing is directly my problem to solve, but I’m caught in the crossfires as priorities shift at work and there’s tension between teams, for example. Or drama between my mom and brother and then they both come to me about it. I feel lost and overwhelmed. I want to support everyone, but then I have no energy left to take care of myself, and I need it after dealing with all these draining issues. Any tips or commiseration?
Anon
Commiseration here—i just want to sleep it all away, but I can’t because I have a newborn.
Anon
“That sounds tough. What are you going to do about it?”
To be clear, this is not me saying this to you. It’s what you say to other people who try to get you to take on their problems.
eertmeert
For family: “I love you and so I want you to know I have about 10 minutes of listening in me today.” followed by “Hey, it’s been 10 minutes. I am glad to support you, but I am bushed. Can we switch topics? Otherwise I should go, since need some recharge time.”
“Sorry, no more triangulation for me today.”
“Whoops – look at the time. Got to go!”
“Oof, I am so tired. Going to take a nap. Let’s talk later this week. Good luck with X – you can do it”
Hollis
Responding late to the question yesterday about the large vs. small company. I’ve worked at a couple of Biglaw firms with multiple global offices, a couple of medium sized full-service “regional” firms, and am now at a small firm, and I can attest that in my experience, the smaller firm is the best hands-down. My firm only practices in my particular practice area, which means that I’m not paying for a lot of overhead to cover more overhead-heavy practice areas (not just in terms of people but software, books, conferences, etc.). We don’t need to pay for a bunch of marketing, HR, IT and other back-of-house staff. And importantly, I am making way more money because I basically keep about 60% of what I bill, as opposed to about 33% when I was an income partner at a mid-sized firm. My smaller firm pays for everyone’s parking too. I also didn’t think there was any way a smaller firm could pay more, and I was always attracted to the prestige of BigLaw firms, but I’m here to tell you that you shouldn’t assume that smaller firm means smaller pay and benefits.