ByKat Hours Updated
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Coffee Break: Mirjana Ballerina

pink ballerina flats with gold bow detail

Well I'm clearly in a twee mood this week — but these cute ballerina flats from Sarah Flint look so adorable. I'm not usually a bow girl, but I really like these.

The flats are available in three colors for $495, available in US sizes 4-13.

(Also: I'm absolutely drooling over these gorgeous blue sandals with flowers on the heel, also from Sarah Flint. Stunning.)

Sales of note for 12.5

135 Comments

  1. Is Marine Layer a real brand? Do we like their quality? How about Pact? And One Quince? I love all the photos of cotton or linen flowy summer clothes but am hesitant to commit actual dollars. Thanks!

    1. My husband has some hoodies by marine layer and likes them a lot. They do have actual stores in a few cities you could check out if you’re nearby.

      1. my husband solely wears Marine Layer for his boho cool guy look. He’s real cute too :D

        I haven’t worn any womens but it’s A+ for men. direct stores, bloomingdales (my choice) or Nordstrom

    2. Marine Layer is a real brand with brick and mortar stores. I haven’t tried any of their clothing, as its out of my budget, but I love their styles. I have a few friends who buy from them and have liked what they’ve bought.

      Pact seems to be more heavily online but has a few brick and mortar stores. I don’t know anyone who has bought from them, but they seem to do a lot of advertising on Instagram.

      Once Quince / Quince is newer and online only; it’s shtick is to be cheaper higher-quality materials. I was an early adopter, I still have the shirt, sweater, and purse I bought from them maybe 3-4 years ago. Everything has held up well – my only purse which gets use 2-3x a week is from that purchase and it looks great. I haven’t bought from them since, mainly because I don’t like online shopping as much as in person shopping. In talking with friends who have bought from them, things seem to be hit or miss. But, when its a hit its cashmere or silk for cheaper.

      1. ok… well, can you share your experience? Give some sort of relative comparison per the price point?

        1. The cashmere you can wear once and then it bags out and pills. Cheap cashmere is cheap for a reason, because the quality is bad.

      2. Yeah, atrocious is probably a bit hyperbolic. It’s not the softest cashmere ever, but I think it’s about what you can expect for the price. I had a couple of Old Navy cashmere sweaters a couple years back and they reminded me of them. A basic, but not a lasting one.

        1. Agree that atrocious is hyperbolic. The stuff is…fine? I have some of the cashmere sweaters and the washable silk shirts. Feels comparable to what I’d get at BR, if BR were selling natural fibers For me, the fit is always just a little bit off, so I just don’t reach for them often, but I’m on the taller side, so it could be that. They’ve got a decent return policy, so you can try and return as needed.

          I have their silk pillowcases – and those have held up for me. I’ve bought more so I can have more in rotation for when I don’t get to laundry promptly.

          I have some Pact items (mostly underwear). It’s serving it’s purpose? No notes on either extreme.

    5. I’ve been in Marine Layer stores in Austin – yes a thing. I ordered from Pact last summer (just cotton undies) and was happy with what I got. Lots of commenters here talk about Quince but I think they’re online only.

    6. Marine Layer is a real brand with physical stores, and I’ve been really happy with the quality of everything I’ve purchased there. Pact and Quince have been a mixed bag for me. I really liked the baby clothes I bought at Pact and bedding from Quince, but not their women’s clothes.

    7. Quince silk tees and cashmere tees are what I reach for when I am wearing a suit. I treat the items gently and they have stayed in good shape.

    8. I’m a fan of pact the quality for price is excellent. However sizing is a bit dicey, it used to be a more yoga brand and size accordingly but the last few releases have been subject to vanity sizing which makes online ordering hard.

      1. This exactly. It’s good clothing and looks quite nice on. (I vastly prefer it to prAna.)

    9. I have Pact underwear and leggings, and like them. I have Quince linen shirts and like them, too, but they’re new, so haven’t really been put to the test yet. But they fit well and the linen seems comfortable.

      If you live near a Whole Foods, they stock some Pact stuff.

      1. I do not love Pact. The fabric is so thin and clingy, and everything seems oversized to me. Marine Layer is legit.

    10. I’ve purchased Pact- both online and also Whole Foods carries their stuff. The leggings did not work at all for me (too small), but I like the bras and cami. Quality is great- smooth, nice and thick cotton.

    11. I ordered some organic cotton underwear from Pact on a recommendation (from here?) last year. I was… unimpressed, I guess is the word. I didn’t hate them, but they seemed like Fruit of the Loom type underwear that you grab a 3-pack of in when the airline lost your luggage. Not something I would ever have chosen in a store. I kept them and they’re holding up fine.

  2. i’m a fan of quince. bought one of those satin skirts with a coordinating cashmere sweaters which i wore a lot. also have a pair of linen pants and a linen shirt. i have a sweater that has not held up great but it was cheaper than plenty of other sweaters i have bought that also haven’t held up.

  3. Can anyone recommend some good all-inclusive family friendly resorts? Pools preferred to beaches, kids 9 and 13.

      1. Okay, this drives me crazy. If she had a specific location or price in mind, she would have said it. So many people here expects the question to be the MOST THOROUGH possible or they absolutely will give no answer at all. If she wants all inclusive, that narrows it down to a particular area of the world, so just give her your opinion on which one is the best in that area!!!

        (I don’t have a recommendation. We are going to Finest in DR soon but can’t comment yet.)

        1. +1. People here looooove to pick apart others’ questions. It’s really condescending.

        2. It doesn’t narrow it down to a particular area of the world. They have all-inclusive resorts in Alaska, the Caribbean, Mexico, Bali, and Wyoming, to name a few. If you only want kids activities included and are okay paying for food separately, there are plenty of resorts with loads of things for kids to do scattered around the upper Midwest and running through VA to TN.

          1. Huh, are there all inclusive resorts in Alaska? I guess some of those luxury lodges might count.

          2. Ooh burn you read her question about pools instead of beaches and definitely thought Alaska. Lol.

          3. See now I’m curious. Can you recommend the good all-inclusives in the Midwest?! I could also easily like Kentucky-ish too (what is that area called, middle south?)

          4. Midwest all-inclusive (depending what package you buy) resort: Madden’s on Gull. Lake resort type thing in the “up north cabin” area of Brainard, which isn’t really *that* far up north. Whether it counts as *good* probably depends on what you’re comparing it to, tho.

            I’m guessing The Dells in Wisconsin probably have some, as does Door County, Wisconsin. Don’t have any input, can’t speak to them though.

          5. anon, you insist on being condescending and nasty. That is on you.

            Heated pools are a thing. In some respects, I far prefer heated pools in colder climates to normal pools in hot climates: you’re not bathing in soup when it’s 95 degrees outside.

            “Pools instead of beaches” can also be shorthand for “a lot of stuff to do at the resort” or “I don’t want to corral my kids in waves and surf; I just want them to be in the water with lifeguards looking on.” Which could be anywhere in the world.

          6. Wisco girl here –

            You can def find some all inclusive packages at Kalahari or Chula Vista or the Wilderness in Wisconsin Dells. IMHO it would be a foolish way to do Wisconsin Dells since there are way better restaurants off campus and a better variety of activities if you don’t limit yourself to one resort, since those resorts are a lot smaller than what you’re talking about in the Caribbean or Mexico. However I agree that they exist.

            Now I disagree that you’ll find something all inclusive even close to comparable in Door County. Door County is very resistant to big chains or big resort style hotels, and from what I know of Door County they don’t exist there. Still a nice place to visit! Although I’d argue Door County is definitely nicer for adults who are interested in eating, boutique shopping and looking at funky art/places in a cool unique area with good nature.

          8. Regarding Wisconsin: I have looked at going to the Four Seasons in Door County (not affiliated with the famous hotel chain). Food has to be purchased on your own, but you don’t have to leave the resort for that.

            One of my friends swears by the Abbey Resort on Lake Geneva. Food isn’t included in the room rate, but absolutely everything else is. Her kids absolutely love the place.

          9. I would never use the term “all-inclusive” to describe a resort that didn’t include food. I think that’s really a stretch. And if you just pay for a meal plan, that also isn’t really all-inclusive. To me, all-inclusive means all the food (and usually drink) you want, not just three set meals. Lots of resorts have nice amenities, including kids’ activities, and free breakfast without being all-inclusive. By this definition of all-inclusive, there are very few in the US. It was pretty clear to me what OP meant.

      2. We love the Beaches resort (been 3 times) but the TCI airport is so terrible it’s put us off going back. It’s gotten worse in recent years as tourism has exploded post-Covid and the airport just cannot begin to support the volume of visitors arriving. There was a discussion here about it the other day.

  4. I’m a rising 2L with my first Big Law summer associate screener next week. I have goals to clerk (just one or mayyybe two), but is this something I should keep to myself, or will firms be supportive of it? Just trying to think through how much I should disclose when asked about career plans. Also planning to ask my Career Counselor, but curious to hear from practicing Big law attorneys as well. Thanks!

    1. Original OP and should specify: to the extent it’s relevant, I’m hoping to go into commercial lit, and by “clerk” I mean–hopefully–federal.

    2. Big law firms are generally supportive of clerkships. You get training while not on their payroll. Clerkships are prestigious and look good on the firm website. I’m 10+ years out of law school, but with the trend toward clients not paying for first years’ work, I imagine they’re even happier for their new graduates to clerk than when I graduated.

    3. Keep it to yourself. I clerked as a junior associate – left during what would have been year 3 and came back as a 4th year. It’s not that the firm wasn’t supportive but there’s just no reason to let it be known in the summer associate interview process. These aren’t your friends, your only goal is to get a SA position right now. You need not disclose your long term wishes in hopes that they are will pat you on the back and support you. They are simply looking for bodies to do doc review, you are looking for the paycheck and name on resume and that’s it for now.

      1. This.

        Firms don’t care unless it is a court local to them or actually nationally prestigious. But that’s for later, if and when it matters. Focus on doing good work this summer and if you like the city and the firm. “Your future plans” need be no more specific than to suggest you want to the in that city long term doing litigation.

    5. I wouldn’t bring it up unless asked. It’s not something you need to hide (firms are generally supportive of clerking), but it just doesn’t seem directly relevant to an interview where you’re trying to sell your interest in the firm. (But if someone does ask, I think it’s fine to share your interest and goals — I just might let them lead you there first.)

    6. Don’t mention it because then if you apply and don’t get a clerkship, they may consider you damaged goods. That would be wrong, of course, but still-working out a clerkship if you have an offer is in the “cross that bridge when you come to it” category.

    7. Not sure if you’re still checking here, but don’t bring it up affirmatively in the interview. If it comes up in context (like the interviewer talking about their clerkship for whatever reason) then it’s fine to share, but otherwise that is a conversation you have during your summer associate time–usually over lunch with a friendly associate or partner and not in the office.
      I am a BigLaw litigator who clerked in my fourth year as an attorney (district court) and used it as an opportunity to switch firms, which is pretty common–that’s how you get the clerkship bonus and you can jump to a “better” firm, which in my case meant one with nicer people and more interesting work. It’s better for the firm if you clerk immediately after school but in my opinion it’s better for you to work for a few years first, I think you get more out of the clerkship if you have a little practical knowledge. I have had the clerkship conversation with a lot of summers and junior associates, and I’m always happy to do so but it would take me slightly aback if someone brought it up during an interview when they didn’t already have one because I might think they didn’t understand the point of BigLaw (which is for you to make money for the firm, and since so many people do switch firms after clerking they pay to train you and then you leave…).

  5. My parents are late 70s/early 80s and are starting to struggle with retirement due to my dad’s recurring skin cancer, even though they’re very active, healthy and fit. All of their retirement plans (boating, fishing, pickleball, living on the beach, walking outside, etc.) keep get whittled away by the fact that my dad is no longer allowed to be in the sunlight for more than brief periods of time and all of his hobbies historically have been those types of things, or reading/watching the stock market at his desk. They still play indoor pickleball daily, but my dad is acknowledging he’s not going to be able to keep that up much longer and needs something else to do. They previously lived in a retirement community where my mom was active in a bunch of clubs, but my dad’s not really a joiner or a people person. I’m worried he’s starting to get a little depressed and I’d love some ideas to suggest to them of things they could do (especially this summer when it’s soooo hot here in Texas). I suggested they go rent a house somewhere cooler for the summer, but they still struggle with what they would do other than sit around and read and/or find some place to play pickleball. Any ideas I could suggest?

    1. Can your Dad go outside if he’s fully clothed with UV fabric etc? Obviously doesn’t work in Texas but it might if they travel to cooler places.

    2. I don’t mean this in any kind of insensitive way, but if your father is already 80 or close to it, would it be reasonable to just take the risk of recurrent skin cancer? I’m not sure how serious the treatment is or how aggressive his particular is, so disregard if needed, but at some point, quality of life does come to play as well. I know people in the 80s and 90s who chose to stop Covid precautions because they didn’t feel like they had enough time left to be so limited.

      1. Right, and like, what kind of skin cancer are we talking? Getting a few moles removed every year or something more serious?

      2. If by recurrent skin cancer, she means that he’s currently undergoing treatment, then there are some drugs/creams that cause some very serious photosensitivity. Some are bad enough that you can sunburn within 5 minutes.
        If it’s just a general recommendation, then I agree with the general sentiment. Skin cancer in the 80s rises from chronic cumulative sun exposure that won’t undo itself. It makes sense to avoid further damage, but it can be achieved with hats, protective clothing, and sunscreen. Maintaining his activity level and mental health at his age is just as critical if not more than impacting the cumulative effect of skin cancer.

      3. OP here – not insensitive at all and I thought that, but I don’t think I can recommend it to him if he is actively trying to prevent the reoccurrence of cancer and his doctor has told him to avoid the sun. I know if it was me I’d put my lifestyle enjoyment over trying to prolong my life at 80, but I don’t want him to think I’m suggesting that he just die sooner.

        He is not actively under treatment, other than he’s had some major surgeries to remove the cancers and his last surgery was pretty painful and he had a lot of flesh removed. So no chemo or anything like that, but these aren’t small moles he’s having removed, either.

        Everyone’s suggestions to just cover up are good, but he’s been doing that for 5+ years and it’s apparently no longer sufficient. He doesn’t go outside without a long shirt, long pants, hat and sunscreen, but it’s still coming back. Also, they’ve lived exclusively in hot places like TX and FL, so it’s pretty unbearable to be covered up. And while the easy answer seems to be to move somewhere cooler, I think the doctor still frowned on that and the whole goal was to have them close to me (in TX) as they get older so that I’m close by if they need anything. But thank you for everyone’s thoughts and suggestions!

        1. I’m a covered-up, sun-avoidant person, but I understand how much more difficult that is in a place like Florida. I’m miserable when I travel there and it’s hot and sticky and my covered-up clothing is sticking to me.

          I would suggest very early mornings to your dad, still covered up but at least it’s not as hot yet, and the damaging rays of the sun are the worst between 10 – 4.

          https://www.epa.gov/radtown/ultraviolet-uv-radiation-and-sun-exposure

          I also suggest another dermatologist because this one sounds extreme. Most likely your father’s sun damage is already there from years ago. He can’t 100% avoid more of it coming out by staying indoors all the time.

          2. I’ll say this as a cancer patient myself – there are two overarching ways to deal post-diagnosis: the way that you want to do everything you can to prevent it coming back, and the way that you want to live your life, no holds barred. It’s really hard to convince someone in the former to be in the latter.

        2. My dad had a major melanoma spot removed on his head, and yeah, huge chunk of flesh was removed. Luckily it didn’t progress to the point of needing chemo. So I get where you’re coming from. IDK, this is really, really hard. At this point, I wonder how preventable additional melanomas really are. Once you’ve had one, there is a pretty high likelihood of it coming back at some point. I personally would be erring toward enjoying life, but totally get why it’s hard to say that to your dad. I’m proud of your dad for modifying his habits already, like wearing sunscreen, hats, and UPF clothing. Other than wearing a hat all the time, my dad has chosen to not change his habits much.

          1. My husband had a (fortunately) stage zero melanoma removed from his chest near his shoulder and that tiny little thing resulted in A LOT of flesh removal, with a huge scar for bragging rights. This is definitely different than your “burn it off quickly in the office” basal cell experience that a lot of people think of when they hear skin cancer removal.

        3. I’m sure you’ve already done this – but, what is he wearing for pants and shirts in the sun? As a very pale person in Houston, it really needs to be either performance fabrics (there is a reason why Columbia fishing shirts are so popular) or gauze/linen. If he is still wearing cotton chinos to get through the summer or jeans, it’s just making life worse. If you don’t want to pay REI prices, Academy has lots of good options.

        4. Perhaps this is well-known to others, but it wasn’t to me. I just learned about the UV index a few years ago even though I’ve been sun-avoidant for a decade as part of my anti-aging efforts. I use the weather channel app, and it provides the UV index on an hour by hour basis. I’ve been surprised to learn that, even when it’s cloudy, the UV index can be quite high.
          So perhaps if your dad goes out when the UV index is zero or, possibly, one (with a hat), he could get out some? This doesn’t help for mid-day activities, but it would help him enjoy the outdoors some. Especially if he is a sterotypical old man who wakes up super early in the mornings. There is time to fish and walk the beach early early in the mornings, although probably not for as many hours as he may like.
          Unfortunately, I’m not a hobby person, so I don’t have suggestions for good indoor hobbies other than cooking. But, I guess I will plug cooking becauase it can be a lot of fun, can be done with others, provides an opportunity to invite people to your house for socializing, and can be easy or complex depending on your mood, time available, and skills.

    3. He can’t go outside even covered up?

      I’m sorry to say that he’s an adult and you can’t force him to do anything. But he could join an a gym for physical activity.

      2. +1

        My father joined a weekly bridge group of guys at his golf club (as he can’t golf anymore) and it’s great for him. The social part is the best part. He also used to love to boat/fish, so it is hard for him.

    5. Is he restricted to indoors or just direct sunlight? For example, could he go for hikes in shady woods on a cloudy day wearing sleeves and a hat? If so, I vote move the heck outta Texas.

      Can he fish in the early morning? My dad is a lifelong fisherman and would leave at 3am and be back by 6am because that’s when the fish bite. Similarly, can he do evening walks once the sun goes down? All of this would be easier in,say, Seattle or Portland vs Texas.

      1. If the doctor would ban going outside even in very early morning, I’d honestly (personally) just take my chances. That’s too restrictive for someone who loves the outdoors and gets a lot of life benefit from them.

    6. Can he go outside in the evenings or anytime when the sun is less intense? He’d still need daytime activities, but is it possible that he could keep up with the hobbies he enjoys?

    7. He might have maxed out exploring this, but just in case – could you help him find better, more protective UPF clothing? My best friend is on a medication that makes sun exposure dangerous to her, and she’s really gotten thorough with this – she has a whole drawer of gloves, hoods, and face masks from Coolibar that are very highly rated and approved by her doctors. It might make him feel a little goofy at first, but that might be worth it for activities he loves.

    8. Very specific recommendations if they are in the Austin area. Most of the community centers in the area (especially Georgetown) have monthly day trips for seniors – think a group going to the Dr. Pepper museum then getting pie. I’d check with the local community center if they have something similar – parents really like just not having to drive. Most of them also have indoor tracks as well for your dad to walk around – with air conditioning. Now, what’s your dad’s position on trains? There are plenty of novelty train rides in Texas that you could do a dad-daughter day to cheer him up. Also, it’s pretty kid centric but Kalahari is a massive indoor water park if they want some pool time. Caves are all 65 degrees too if they want to have a summer of indoor-ish exploration. Longhorn Caverns is fantastic and totally walkable.

      1. Please can you share the novelty train rides because all that comes up when I search is polar express (which my children LOVED). I am looking for things for my children to do this summer and my son can’t be outside in the sunshine for more than 45mins. I have a daytrip to Houston for the space museum and added Longhorn Caverns for another weekend.

        P.S. Divorce from hell over here…. not able to leave the state of Texas this summer and I have 5 weeks with the children. Thank goodness its a huge state.

    9. – Indoor swimming
      – Topgolf or similar (usually the area where you hit the ball is covered)
      – Bowling league (my grandpa did this and loved it)
      – Axe throwing
      – Volunteering somewhere indoors, such as a soup kitchen, cat shelter, library, or museum
      – Adult painting or drawing classes
      – Arcades (more favorite memories with my grandpa)
      – Escape rooms
      – Going to outdoor concerts & sporting events but getting seats guaranteed to be under the shade

    10. Astronomy is a neat hobby to take up and many towns have sky parks and astronomical societies. It’s a great way to get outdoors in the dark. No two night skies are the same.
      For indoors-but-active, many golf clubs have simulators, and even sim leagues in the winter.

    11. I have a mother who has had skin cancer issues but I also have a son who can’t regulate his temperature well and Texas is HARD in the summer months. The sun here is another level and beats down on you. There is also no breeze to help the skin cool and regulate, which leads to a faster burn time. I joined the YMCA and JCC so the children can do sports indoors. Is this something your parents can do? Swimming is always a good one for indoor activities.

      If I was able to, I would be in or as close to Canada as possible during the summer months. If not in Canada, I would be in Maine during the summer months.

  6. Thanks for the cards ideas! I think I’m going to do a combination – hang ribbons inside my closet so that I can see the cards but not anyone else.

    Another interior decor question – what do you do with framed diplomas etc? I have a home office area (corner of living room) and have a sentimental career accomplishment thing I wouldn’t mind putting up. Debating whether its tacky

    1. Personally, I would not hang a diploma in my living room, even if my office were in a corner. I might hang it in a designated office, but even then, unless I were seeing clients there, I’m not sure. Diplomas aren’t good decor and I don’t need to prove my credentials to myself or anyone visiting my home.

      1. Yes to diplomas are bad decor. Why would you want to look at a diploma instead of art? Not necessarily tacky, just ugly and boring. My husband’s mom framed his diploma and it’s wrapped in bubble wrap packed into this gigantic box that we’ve lugged around in multiple cross country moves but never hung and I very much resent the space it takes up but haven’t actually asked him to unframe it. Mine are just loose in a folder.

    2. I got my grad school diploma framed because it came in an envelope and I didn’t know how to protect it otherwise and it has been wrapped up in bubble wrap from 3 or 4 moves ago. It’s a shame because the framing job was really nice, but art takes priority for my home wall space and hanging it at work hasn’t been something that’s done where I’ve worked.

        1. It’s only tacky if, when I meet you, you are reluctant to say the name of the institution, offering only that it is “in the Durham area” and then when I get to your house your Duke diploma, framed to twice it’s size, is hanging over the fireplace.

    3. I have my diplomas in my office-offfice in bubble wrap on the floor, because even at work it feels like a little much to hang them.

  7. Recently I was at a museum and saw some collages and photos displayed behind a thick layer of glass—but not a frame. Like just clear glass, no additional elements. I don’t know what this is called but I want to do something similar with my photos. Suddenly a random collection of photos looks like a work of art behind the glass! How would you go about doing this?

    1. I think they make frames like this, but I’m not sure what they’re called so I can’t help with google. But I don’t think you need to DIY it if you don’t want to.

      1. Floating frames are close, but they have studs. (Example- search “ANY SIZE Custom Made Floating Frameless No Frame Acrylic Wall Mount Picture Frame”)

      2. You can do this with regular “frameless” frames. You just use double sided tape to lightly stick your items to the back board, then the glass holds it there.

        1. I usually buy a frame-sized poster board to use as the backing because it generally looks nicer than what the frame came with. I also like being able to choose the color. If you’re just framing one thing this way it can end up looking like a custom sized mat, but it’s behind, not on front. I just remembered this is called “floating.”

    3. Do you mean attached to the glass (look up acrylic face-mounted prints) or like a deep shadow box made of class or acrylic? For either, talk to a good framer. For a shadow box, it will be vastly cheaper to find something premade.

    2. I get whatever goes on sale at the Nordstrom Anniversary sale and I’ve always like it.

    4. Coyuchi

      I hate Barefoot dreams fwiw. Doesn’t wash well and feels plastic like and cheap.

  9. Why do dentists lie? I had such a rough experience yesterday, and she told me I’d be fine today. I’m visibly bruised, swollen, can barely open my mouth, in so much pain. Like. Just tell me to anticipate a rough day?

    1. That sounds like something may have gone wrong vs. the dentist outright lying. What was the procedure? I have had a lot of dental work (implant, replaced implant, root canal, crowns, bonding, cavities, pulled teeth), and never had a reaction quite that severe. If it were me, I would call the dentist and let them know what is going on and see if you need to come back in.

    2. Dental is very much a for-profit industry. Any way they can make a buck they will: fillings you don’t need, unnecessary treatments, extra x rays etc it’s all fair game, the goal is to trick you into dental work and separate you from your money.

      1. I’m sure there are dentists who do this, just like I’m sure there are people in every profession who do. But I’ve only ever had good experience with dentists.

        1. It’s much more buyer beware than other professions. I have an excellent dentist, but still think your experience is not typical. It was hard for me to find a dentist who wasn’t all about the upsell.

        2. The dental lobby is currently trying to kill tooth regeneration technology. It’s appalling immoral.

      2. This seems extremely cynical. I know dentists like this exist, but I do not believe it’s the majority of them.

        1. The news in my city recently tested a bunch of dentists by sending in a fake patient with perfect teeth and comparing recommend treatment regimens. Unfortunately it was indeed the majority of dentists trying the scam their ‘patients’

          1. I definitely trust your random local news outlet that’s definitely not also motivated entirely by profits.

          2. The publicly funded news station does not have a profit motive. Dentists were being shady, idk why you’re so defensive unless you have a personal stake in this.

        2. There’s history to this (the success of fluoride programs cut into profits so much that they had to scramble to retain business; it’s not some kind of conspiracy — industry conferences had workshops on how to maximize profit whether patients needed the care or not and how to push cosmetic care more aggressively). I think dentistry has been getting a lot better overall (avoiding unnecessary fillings especially, but also more medically informed and research based in practice), but it’s still easy to see three dentists and get three opinions on what needs done (and one opinion will be that you should definitely replace all your front teeth with caps, whether that’s good for your teeth or not).

    4. That doesn’t sound normal and I don’t think they lied to you, I think you’re an outlier. I would call them and let them know!

    5. As someone married to a dentist who puts a lot of care into treating his patients, most (good) dentists don’t lie. In fact they often try to prepare you for the worst. It’s possible your dentist isn’t great. But also, people are unpredictable – sometimes they go in there and things don’t go as planned, sometimes people have a bad reaction, etc. If you are in way more pain that advertised I recommend calling their office because it’s possible something went wrong!

    6. An update for y’all, after I posted this the dentist called to check on me and was very apologetic and acknowledged she should have given me a warning about this since my experience was unexpected normally but she expected it based on how yesterday went. In the interests of being anonymously fair!

      1. Thanks for the update!

        I’ve noticed that my great dentist is basically no help with pain (I assume prescribing scheduled meds is a huge hassle with the DEA). I’ve wondered before if I should call my doctor if I’m in “haven’t slept for days” pain.

        I’d have appreciated that check in call. I hope you feel a lot better soon!

  10. What are your summer serums and so forth? Thinking about adding Glow Recipe drops to my moisturizer

  11. I keep going back to look at yesterday’s green floral blouse Splurge. There is no planet on which I need a $495 blouse but it is just so pretty.

    2. I bet you will wear it a ton. Go for it. My favorite items are the ones I splurged on.

  12. Paging Royal Ascot person – what a fun occasion!

    Have some links for you in mod on the original post – tldr: go to Peter Jones/John Lewis and look at the Hobbs and LK Bennet if you want something easy.

    You could have a look at Vinted and Depop as well, you could find something that’s very lovely and not from the same shops everybody else’s been to this year. I saw a super cute light blue LK Bennet 60ies style silk dress with a black collar, just searching for silk LKB.

      1. Same: my favorites are “All I want is a room somewhere” and “I’ve grown accustomed to her face” but I can sing them all, and have been humming them all day since that post!

        1. I’ve been all “What. A. Thrilling moment that was didn’t they matain an exhausting pace! What a smashing absolutely dashing running of the Ascot op’nig race!”

    2. Thank you!!!
      My credit card is on fire right now from all the things I bought to try, so what’s a bit more!!???!

  13. Does this read as passive aggressive? Coworker almost never comes into the office in spite of saying she’ll do so one or two days a week. Coworker recently had a major mess up at work, which prompted a big conversation with their boss about their performance. Coworker has now been in the office every day this week. Today when we ran into each other she said, “It’s so nice to see you.” And I said, “You too! It’s so nice to have you coming in more often.” I meant it genuinely – we’re a small team and it feels great to have people come in more consistently. But do you think that could come across as passive aggressive or nagging since the reason she’s coming in is less than flattering?

    1. All in the tone of voice. If you genuinely and enthusiastically meant what you said, I’m sure you were fine.

    2. I think if you meant it genuinely, then you’re fine. Yes, the other person could possibly think you’re being passive aggressive, but it’s more likely they will not, and there is nothing wrong with what you said.

  14. I’m on the West Coast and done for the day (early start today) and celebrating an “all clear” medical event. I want to make something kind of fancy for dinner tonight to celebrate, and not just my usual roasted chicken thighs and veggies. I have time to do some grocery shopping. What’s your go-to for something like this?

    1. Fancy snacks! I get a good bottle of prosecco or something to mix a fun drink, and indulge in an array of good cheese, olives, little tapas-type bites, small desserts, maybe some things from the super-bougie grocery store hot bar and deli. The goal is to feel like I’m at a tapas restaurant or fancy bar but at home in comfy clothes.

      1. +1

        I love doing this too. I get some cheese, pate, good bread, some berries or cherries, some chocolate, maybe a bottle of rose chilled.

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