Coffee Break: Tempo Pavé Diamond Huggie Earrings

140 Comments

1. Help! Was invited to a partners house for a group dinner over the weekend and explicitly told not to bring anything. Do I bring something anyway? If so what? No booze because I don’t drink and am not knowledgeable about it at all. Will be the only female (excluding dates) in attendance if it matters.

   1. I think it’s appropriate to take them at their word and not bring anything.

   2. Associate who cannot follow explicit instructions = not good. And the male associates won’t bring anything.

      Send a thank you note to the home next week maybe.

      1. +1

      2. +1000 on the thank you note. I’ve had more than one partner compliment me on having sent a thank you note, saying that I was the only one who did so and it really made me stand out (in a good way).

   3. Yay! I can comment here. I am alway’s told NOT to bring anything to the manageing partner’s house for dinner, but I alway’s bring a bouquee of Sunflowers — I can get them VERY inexpensiveley at my corner grocer’s and Margie enjoys them. Margie also says she dries them out and eat’s the seeds!!!! FOOEY b/c they are NOT peeled and she has to peel them herself, and I eat sunflower seeds I buy at Trader Joe, but someone has already peeled them for me! YAY!!!

   4. Ok, thanks, will not bring anything.

   5. I always bring a small plant that’s nice from Whole Foods or similar. No one is like, “Ugh gawd, a plant” but it always goes over well. I’d do that. It’s just a small something.

      1. Disagree. Bring nothing.

      2. Seriously. I tire of the idea that every dinner I’m invited to comes with an entry fee, even if its just a “small something” which always costs money and time to acquire. Especially where guests are explicitly told not to bring something.

      3. No. No. No. This is not a good idea at all.

      4. Please don’t bring a plant.

         -Signed, someone with allergies to essentially all living things and who also manages to kill all plant life and doesn’t want to deal with the maintenance/trashing it. Even if it’s a “low” or no-mai plant, I will find a way to kill it.

      5. Yeah, even though people are polite, nobody wants a plant.

      6. Also, they specifically said not to bring anything. Don’t bring anything when the hosts say that.

      7. I see where you are coming from but still think it’s best to bring nothing as directed, unless you have such a strong feeling that you MUST bring something it will bother you forever (and even then).

         Also, if you brought me a plant, you’d really be bringing my cat a snack and a toy and me some extra cleaning….

   6. I have had a similar situation, but I was attending a dinner at my husband’s partner’s house. We didn’t know who else was invited (his firm or otherwise). We were told do not bring anything. I still brought flowers, already cut and in a small vase. The arrangement was small and roughly 25 dollars altogether. I found that by bringing something that no one needed to cut, store, etc, it was easy to hand off right away. And the partner’s wife who did all the cooking in this case, was very thankful, and said she appreciate the flowers several times.
      I take “don’t bring anything” to mean, don’t bring any food.

2. Book recommendation please. I’m someone on the fence about having kids. Most of the books I have purchased are on the joys of not having kids. I’d like to read a book or two about the joys of having kids. It seems most of the books on making the decision skew negative and I’d like to see how I feel after reading a more positive book. Ideas?

   1. Two options:

      Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids: Why Being a Great Parent is Less Work and More Fun Than You ThinkPaperback– May 8, 2012

      by Bryan Caplan(Author)

      and

      Bringing Up Bébé: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting (now with Bébé Day by Day: 100 Keys to French Parenting)

      1. I had two children in rapid succession after age 38. I was old and set in my ways. And it’s been a blast (while still being at biglaw, thankfully with the bebe years during the recession). I am a bit of a thrill-seeker and (you wouldn’t guess from the minivan) this tops it all. Big adventure. No pause button.

         People in the 70s had kids and we turned out OK (OK: so they self-medicated. A lot. But they also were more relaxed and not so OMG my pinterest must be perfect). Just go for it.

         Plus: who will change my diapers when I am old?

         1. There’s no guarantee that your kids will change your diapers!

            1. Of course.

               But a person who shelled out for organic triple-fold cloth diapers (OMG mistake for us but they make good burp clothes after enough bleach) and pampers can dream, non?

            2. My adult daughter (a hospice nurse-manager) swears she won’t let me go to a nursing home. I’m more pragmatic and expect to be in a nursing home.

   2. I’d check out Jessica Valenti’s aptly-named “Why Have Kids.” I also like the blog Cup of Joe for sweet and sane musings on all the wonderful parts of parenting.

      1. Correction: Cup of Jo!

   3. Can you share some of the better-written books on *not* having kids?

      1. +1

      2. Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed: Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids – Meghan Daum

         1. Didn’t one of those writers recently write a follow-up article about having a kid? It was interesting, though I can’t remember where I read it.

   4. FWIW, i am not big on kids generally speaking. Hanging out with other people’s kids did not help me want to have kids. Thinking to the future about having big holidays with kids & grandkids did.

      I have a 2 year old and even when she’s at her worst, she’s the best.

   5. +1 to Bringing Up Bebe. It was the book that convinced me to have my daughter. I don’t think French people are better than we are and don’t read those “Why French Women Rule and You Drool” books, but what was holding me back from wanting to have a kid was pretty much the current American way of parenting where once you have a child, your life is expected to be 100% focused on that. Reading about how it works in other countries sort of gave me the permission to myself to relax about this whole parenting thing and go for it. Got knocked up like two months after reading the book. Having a kid has been great. Good luck with whatever you choose!

      1. I am pregnant and going to go buy this book.

         1. It’s so good.

   6. I haven’t read any useful books to recommend, but I can tell you that the fun of it is tough to put into words. In some ways you just have to take a leap of faith and understand that immeasurable, unexpected joy (and some heartbreak!) will come along with it. I always thought parents were being pretentious when they told me this, but it’s true!

      1. I agree. I very much respect women who decide not to have kids, but I wish everyone could experience the feeling of looking at your own child. It brings me to tears at times, even just thinking about it. It’s such an overwhelming and indescribable feeling.

         1. I think you mean you wish everyone could experience the feeling *you* have looking at your child. Obviously not everyone feels the same way or there wouldn’t be so many abused and neglected children in the world.

            1. Huh. Odd post.

      2. This times a million. Before you have kids you think you have the pro and con list figured out, because the cons are all things you basically have already experienced: being tired, stressed, stretched too thin, etc. But the pros are just indescribable. You have no idea AT ALL how good the good stuff is until you experience it.

      3. Agree. There are no words to describe the bliss I feel when those little arms reach for me and say “Mommy, I need a snuggle.”

         1. My bliss moment this week was listening to my 15yo ds go on & on & on about what he’s been learning in chemistry at school. He’s loving it. Seeing my boys learn and grow is one of my absolute favorite things about being a parent.

   7. Check out All Joy & No Fun. The first 4/5 of it made me never want to have kids, but that last chapter…

      It’s worth a read, regardless of what side of “kids” fence you’re on.

      1. All Joy and No Fun is probably the best “parenting” book I’ve read, and I’ve read a LOT.

   8. A recent german study concluded that having kids was worse for happiness and mental health than losing a spouse. Just food for thought.

      1. Between the comments on this s!te and the Moms s!te, I am convinced having a child is the best way to ruin a good marriage.

         1. Another one! I’m sensing a pattern here . . .

            1. I’ll make it easy for you – not everyone wants to have kids and some who do have kids spend the rest of their lives regretting it. The latter is particularly heartbreaking for everyone involved.

   9. This is sort of a wacky suggestion, but maybe read Dinner: A Love Story. It’s a blog turned into a cookbook-memoir (wow, I’m really selling it, right?) but in between recipes, I think it’s just a terrific memoir about how normal people make family life happen. She talks about being a working mom, a stay at home mom, a work-from-home mom. She talks about making family rituals happen, about how to entertain with kids. She’s a little more intense than I am, but as long as you take it with a grain of salt, I think it’s a kind of inspirational perspective on making family happen. And because her kids are older, it takes you beyond the baby years and gives you a glimpse of what life might be like with school-age kids.

      Also, you might be interested in reading about Respectful Infant Education, or RIE. I don’t adhere to every bit of the philosophy, but I really like some of their ideas and it serves as a nice corrective to the “attachment parenting-cater to your child’s every need” model that is prevalent on the internet.
      There are so many books about babies – it might be helpful to add in the perspective of older kids.

      1. Yeah, those little baby/toddler snuggles are completely awesome, but parenting older kids can just kick your butt and break your heart like nothing else. It’s a lifelong endeavor and sometimes it turns out fantastically well and sometimes notsomuch. I adore my child and wouldn’t trade the experience of parenting for anything, but over time it’s a real rollercoaster and don’t let anybody tell you different.

   10. When I was young I read “Thundering Sneakers” and it made me want a big family.

3. Hail Mary pass here….Any one know of a highly recommended assisted living facility near Philadelphia? Preference if the facility has a memory care unit. Thanks in advance!

   1. I’ve heard good things about Atria, which is in Center City – not sure about memory specifically, though.

      1. As I conduct my own “Let me google that for you” I see they have a page on their s!te dedicated to memory care: http://www.atriaseniorliving.com/living-options/memory-care/

   2. Contact your local Alzheimer’s Association chapter. They will be able to help you!

   3. A local physician/case worker should have a direct line, if not multiple, to memory care facilities, too!

   4. Your employer may have a service that will look around for you.

   5. I should say, we have hired a geriatric social worker who is very experienced but has only recommended one facility near Narberth/Ardmore, which is our area of particular interest. I know you ladies sometimes have a wealth of knowledge so it was worth a try!

   6. It would be a bit of a hike for you, but if you’re willing to go to Lehigh Valley I can recommend the place where my husband’s grandmother lived. They were wonderful. Post an email if you would like more details.

   7. When moving my grandmother to the Philadelphia/Main Line suburbs, I went on tours of Sunrise (this was one further out, before they built the one in Ardmore), Quadrangle (lovely, not sure about a memory unit), Beaumont (small), Martins Run (larger Jewish population), and a few others. She eventually ended up at Riddle Village in Media, which does have a memory unit. Overall, we weren’t thrilled with the nursing care at Riddle, but very few places are perfect. Hope that at least gives you some ideas.

4. I’m picking up the save-the-date cards for my wedding this weekend and am eager to get them in the mail. Buying beautiful Crane stationery and choosing our fonts and wording has been my favorite part of the wedding process (way better than stressful dress shopping!).

   That fancy paper cost a pretty penny, though, so I’d love to avoid paying a calligrapher to address them. What’s the best way for me to accomplish this solo? Should I get a fountain pen? Will my own handwriting (pretty, but far from calligraphy) look funny on formal stationery? I’ve thought about doing an online DIY calligraphy class when invitation time comes around, but I’d love to get the save-the-dates in the mail sooner rather than later.

   1. Caligraphy marker > fountain pen if you’re not used to a fountain pen

      But your handwriting is fine.

   2. Are you handy with word at all? A good friend of mine designed wrap around address labels for me using our fonts (the address in the front, my return on the back) and they looked great. Looks like a few people also sell them.
      https://www.weddingpaperdivas.com/shop/address-labels.htm?cid=SEM-WPD-Google-NonBrand&crid=81272378926&campaignidinkenshoo=8174&adgroupidinkenshoo=2596471&kw=return%20address%20labels%20for%20wedding&mType=b&networkType=search&gclid=CKPT6tmr6MgCFdgcgQodhx0B8A&mpch=ads

   3. If you have a decent printer at home, you can also run the envelopes through the printer (unless they’re the type with a thick liner, in which case maybe they wouldn’t be flexible enough)? I did that with our save-the-dates, selecting a typeface that coordinated with our cards, which turned out pretty good and let’s face it, the envelope ends up in the trash immediately anyway.

      1. This is what I did too. I was happy with the results.

   4. I’ve never done this, but I’ve seen some things online where you print it out in a light gray in a fancier font and then trace over it with a nice pen.

      But I think your handwriting would be fine as well.

   5. I actually found a lovely girl on Craiglist who did it for what I considered not nearly enough money (I paid her extra). She was an artist, and it was her hobby. Obviously, you may not get so lucky, but it’s worth a try. She was so lovely that when I met her in a coffee shop to do the hand-off, she stayed and helped me stuff the envelopes.

      I did get a good number of replies that were obvious no-go’s before she responded to me, so be prepared, but I definitely recommend trying that route.

      1. Oh, edit to clarify – I posted for help under the “Gigs” section.

5. What’s your favorite app for medication reminders? I love pillboxie but it doesn’t let you track PRN/as needed medication.

   1. I use medisafe. It does let you put in medication as needed. so far I haven’t missed a dose which is saying something for my memory. You can change each dose, frequency and timing of reminders.

6. Looks like we may be adopting a toddler soon. Everything crossed! What type of bed do we need? Essentials other than car seat?

   1. Toddler to me is 1<=x<=2, in which case you probably want a crib or a crib that converts to a toddler bed. Pack & play in a pinch.

   2. A toddler bed might be good (since it is not as big) or a regular twin bed with a rail on it. Unless the child is still in a crib, then you might want to continue with that for a while during the adjustment period.

      1. Google “bunky” boards. They let you use frame + bunky + twin mattress so the bed is not up so high. We did that at first with a 2 year old to keep things closer to the ground. The rails were a pain and if you are closer to potty training, you want the child to be able to get up and go even if they wear something like a pull-up in bed.

         1. Heh. Never heard of this. Bunky is my nickname, though…

   3. Congrats! Adoption is a wonderful thing :)

   4. Perhaps find out what he sleeps on now and go with that. My toddler has been in a double bed since she was 17 months old. I have friends with 2 year olds that are still in cribs, in toddler beds, or in Big Beds. Mine moved to a bed because she screamed when I put her in the crib (but first she did a stint on the crib mattress on the floor).

      You probably want some kind of booster seat (vs high chair, but that could work) to have him sit at the table with you for meals. Our kid sits on a box, but that’s just how she is. Some kind of spill-resistant cup (camelbak water bottle is a fave in our house, also sippy cups). Cool toys, like a train set. Toothbrush (OMG thank you to whomever suggested “looking for bunnies” while brushing teeth–it was life changing). Bath toys. A small choice of books to read at bedtime.

   5. Fingers crossed and (hopefully) congratulations!! Consider starting out with a twin mattress on the floor. Better than a crib because you can lay down beside them to snuggle/fall asleep together, which may help a potentially difficult transition. And better than an actual bedframe (which you can add later) because the kid won’t get hurt falling out of it, until they’re ready.

      1. Yes, we did the mattress on the floor for the initial transition out of the crib and it worked well.

   6. Congrats and good luck! I don’t recommend a toddler bed. If the toddler is out of a crib, just get a big-kidbed and maybe bed rails. Other necessities: wipes and wine (the latter for you).

   7. Should have been clearer, just over 2 years old.

      1. Waterproof mattress cover, for easily cleaning up pee accidents.

         Small potty, if the toddler is not potty trained (unlikely at 2).

         Diapers – they’re sized by weight (ditto)

         Special cozy blanket or stuffed animal to sleep with

         White noise (iPhone app is great)

         Nightlight

         Little kid sized utensils, plates, and cups

         Water bottle

         Diaper bag (if not potty trained)

         Collapsible Pottette Plus potty, for potty training on the go

         1. A 2 year old going through adoption might regress a bit on the potty training. That’s a really stressful experience, even if it’s a good one.

            1. We have a car potty (it takes a gallon zip-lock). It folks up and looks like a briefcase. You can store extra ziplocks and wipes in it. One Step Ahead (aka the Nervous Parent’s Catalog) sold me mine.

               I am not otherwise a person who buys nervous parent things.

               Also: cannot have too many Eric Carle books.

      2. This is awesome. That sounds really hard. You will be in my prayers.

         1. +1. Wishing you and your family every good thing!

      3. My son is just over 2 years old, and it is such a wonderful age. They are loving and cuddly and curious and clever, all at the same time.

         You’ve already gotten good suggestions on essentials. I’d also add clothes (Old Navy is great if you need to buy a lot at once), toys, books, and toiletries (baby shampoo and soap, toothbrush, kid toothpaste). Also, the C’Moms site is a good resource if you have questions – toddler questions come up almost every day.

         Will you update us and let us know if all goes well with the adoption? I’ll be thinking of you and hoping for the best!

   8. No suggestions but just wanted to say congratulations on your new addition! Wishing you all the best!

   9. My two year old just moved to a toddler bed because that’s what we had for her older brother. If starting over, I would probably do a twin bed or just mattress on the floor. Our night essentials – white noise machine, fake fish aquarium that we use as night light, and swaddling blanket as regular blankets (because they are so big) and a pacifier. Does he/she take a pacifier? We have a stockpile in the bedroom/car.

      Other essentials: bathing supplies and toys, toothbrush with something cool on it, lots of books, booster seat for table, blocks and crayons/Crayola wonder markers/paint with water books. Toddler snacks, sippy cups and kid plates and utensils. I love Carter pajamas and they always have sales and coupons. And Amazon for all things kid related. We also do a size bigger diaper at nighttime. Good luck!

   10. Cabinet locks and outlet covers–new place, new things to be curious about. Some kind of booster seat/high chair for meal times.

       Best wishes!

   11. All very good suggestions above. I also vote for a twin bed instead of a toddler bed. But, depending on the transition requirements for your kiddo, maybe doing whatever the child is currently used to? If this is the first time kiddo will be in your home, it may be comforting to have a sleeping arrangement similar to whatever currently exists in the toddler’s world. So, if it’s a crib see if you can borrow one.
       I would add a Netflix account. Or start DVRing any show on PBS Kids :-) To each their own, but I know when my kiddos are upset/sick/living on the weekend, the tv is a great resource because it allows them to “escape.” My kids are really into Mother Goose Club on Netflix right now. Mickey Mouse Club House is fairly legit, too.
       Has anyone mentioned a car seat yet? Also, find buy sell trade groups or mom groups for your area on Facebook. So many good deals on baby gear. If you do an ISO post I’m confident there would be plenty of options for really good condition gear. It’s worth a shot, especially while you’re in a phase of not knowing exactly what you’ll need.

   12. Sippy cups and milk! (My just-over-two-year-old son drinks so much milk and loves his sippy cups).

   13. Congrats!!!!!! Life changing :) Umbrella stroller. Little legs get tired fast.

   14. Congrats, we JUST adopted a toddler several months ago. I would highly, highly recommend co-sleeping. The newness of everything was very stressful for our kid and he screamed bloody murder the couple of times we tried to put him to sleep in his own room, so he’s in our bed for the foreseeable future and his room is pretty much used to store clothes and change diapers – but I really think it’s been great for bonding. Also, if possible get a toddler carrier – also great for bonding and our kid loves it way more than the stroller.

   15. Straps or brackets to secure all furniture and televisions to the wall are essential.

   16. Thanks for the advice everyone. We have a full sized bed in the room now so maybe will just put the mattress on the floor at first.

7. Help! I accepted a job offer subject to background check, conflict checks, etc., and one of my professional references, when they realized that I was on the market, offered me a job that I’d rather have (I had no idea they were hiring). How terrible is it to back out of the first offer that I accepted (I haven’t given 2 weeks notice at my current job but want to soon).

   1. My advice is never take a job just to be polite. Declining right after getting an offer is fine – they probably have a #2 choice anyway. You should take the new job that you want the most.

   2. on this one, I’d say go for the job you truly want, life is short and work is a big part of it.
      that being said, are you afraid to burn bridges and that it might get back to you?

   3. A lot of smart people say to never accept a counter-offer. I don’t know why – but you should look it up.

      1. It sounds like it’s a separate offer, not a counter though.

         1. Oh, I think you’re right. Take the dream job.

      2. I think this applies to never accepting a counteroffer from the employer you’re planning to leave, on the thinking that whatever was wrong that made you want to leave in the first place will likely crop up again (and also that you may end up damaging your standing with your employer because they know you’re potentially interested in leaving, although I’m not sure how that makes sense if they’re making you a counteroffer to keep you).

         OP seems to be talking about having accepted an offer at not-her-present-employer, and then being offered a second, separate opportunity by a reference at another organization that is also not-her-present-employer. In that case, I think the situation is more analogous to someone accepting a second-choice position and then being offered a first-choice position a week later; OP will possibly burn the bridge with the place where she’s just accepted her offer, at least for awhile, but if the other position is the one she really wants and one she’s likely to stick with for a few years, I think the potential-for-burned-bridges with the accepted-offer company is not a big enough issue to warrant turning down the more ideal position.

   4. it sounds like you accepted something like a conditional offer, where they can rescind it if they find something they don’t like in the various background checks. If that’s the case, that it’s not 100% set in stone, then I think it’s totally reasonable to take the 2nd offer. And even if it’s not “polite” for whatever reason, I’d take the second one anyway. This could potentially be years of your life that you spend at the next place. Do you really want it to not be all that great, especially if you have a better option?

8. Augh! I bought a new car at Pohanka Acura earlier this year, and when I went in for my first service, they couldn’t “find” my maintenance package (which was a match from the price + service offered to me by Chevy Chase Acura). The service guy never followed up. I called a month or two later (I go about 6,000 miles between services) and they had me talk to the salesperson, who said I did have the package and he would work with service to get it credited. Now, I’m due for service again and I call to make sure I am good to go, and they can’t find it again. Reroute me to sales, where the sales manager argues with me for 10 minutes that my package doesn’t exist and implies I shouldn’t have thought it did.

   I’ve emailed the GM and Acura HQ customer service, as well as the finance guy I worked with who had asked I leave them positive reviews on Yelp, etc. Any other avenues, besides fuming on my ride home?

   Also: DC ‘r e t t e s, don’t buy your car from the Pohanka family! What a complete scam.

   1. Honestly, going to another dealer and demanding they match the price was a shitty move on your part. I’m sorry you’re getting bad service but you kind of had it coming

      1. I completely disagree. Gosh!

      2. I didn’t “demand” anything. This was a business deal and they found it worth their time and effort to match a competitor’s offer. I would have been just as happy buying the SAME CAR at the competitor.

      3. Also: get over yourself.

      4. Disagree. This is how I bought my last two cars and the best common advice I’ve gotten from many folks on buying.

   2. No advice. But I’ve had an Acura for 14 years while living in 3 different cities, and the Acura service departments in all 3 of those cities were terrible – to the point that I’m convinced there was a national scam going on, and I will never buy another Acura.

   3. Tweet at corporate Acura, seriously. It’s one of the best ways I have found to get a real response.

   4. I am late to this party, but I own and love my MDX. I will never buy another Acura, however, unless I can do it without ever stepping foot in an Acura dealership. The sales process was absolutely terrible. The pick-up process was terrible. I hate getting serviced there (I did NOT buy the service package) and instead just go to Honda for almost everything (there is a large one that does all acura work near me).

      I am in Boston– I hate Prime Walpole/Norwood the most, but am equally disenchanted by Prime Norwood. I may give Framingham another chance, since they at the very least gave me my own office when they made me sit around all day for service (they do have a shuttle as well) but the sales people there were circling like vultures when they saw I had a 2010.

      On the filp side, my car is fabulous and I plan to drive it into the ground. Have had it 4 years with NO problems at all. Seems to be a cheerio and lollipop stick magnet but I think that’s on me ;)

      1. oops- should be disenchanted by Prime Brighton. Plus, I live outside Boston so driving INTO the city for service is really unappealing. Location isn’t the issue, though.

   5. Can you figure out the CEO’s email address? One quick email, does wonders.

9. 40-something wife / mother of two toddler/babies: likes experiences (trips, etc.) and also heirloom pieces (jewelry?). Lives in San Francisco. What’s something great across a variety of price spectrum… ~$250, $500, and $1,000, or more?

   1. Does she like fine dining? There are so many excellent restaurants in that area where a $250 or $500 gift card would not be much more than a single meal for two. The French Laundry, Acquerello, Campton Place, and Alexander’s Steakhouse are some of my favorites.

   2. My comment seems to have gotten eaten – does she like fine dining? There are a lot of great restaurants in SF and nearby where a gift card in those amounts would be very appropriate.

   3. Tickets to Wente or Fogarty for a really great summer concert?

      Wine club membership. Tour in Napa or Sonoma on Platypus Tours (they’re great). Overnight at Solage in Calistoga.

   4. Ceramics from Heath Ceramics in SF

      Overnight at Indian Springs with massage

      A day of wine tasting and a case of wine from her favorite winery

      Dinner and tickets to SF Ballet or LinesBALLLET

      1. Also, anything from Gallery of Jewels

         Pretty bras (if she is done having kids/nursing)

         An expensive haircut and color

   5. Vintage jewelry at Beladora dot com. I’ve bought several things there and love all of them.

   6. Estate jewellery from beladora … Nice pieces can be had for around 1000.

10. This might be getting into “is my water bottle professional enough” territory, but I’m curious about people’s thoughts, so I’ll ask anyway: Are bright red nails with black French tips too much for a deposition, or other meeting in person with a client/opposing attorney?

    Normally I stick to muted pinks, purples, and greys for more formal days, but I got a gel manicure (because I’m the type to chip or smudge a regular manicure immediately) to go with my costume this weekend, and am now trying to decide whether I need to take it off by Tuesday.

    1. My initial response to this was HOLY CRA P (as in, NO you cannot wear that manicure to a deposition). Absolutely take it off.

    2. My take is that if the explanation is “it went with my costume,” it’s probably too much for a deposition.

       1. This.

    3. I’m in my office wearing jeans right now, and I wouldn’t wear a manicure like that to work.

    4. They sound awesome, costume or not. However, I think I’d try to take it off before the deposition.

       What is your costume?

       1. Circus ringmaster. I saw a woman on a plane once who had light pink with French tips, and I thought it looked so cool, but still classy. I’ve gotten a bunch of compliments with the red, but it’s a bit over the top for me.

    5. You can paint over gel manicures with regular polish in a muted shade — remove it with acetone free remover and you’re back to your gels.

       1. This.

    6. I would wear this and wouldn’t think twice about it. but that’s because I don’t care what people at a deposition think about my nail polish choices.

    7. I would totally do this. I have worn black nails for a depo. But it may be because I am at a point in my career where no one is supervising me and I don’t really care what anyone thinks of my attire. If you are a first-year associate and have a stodgy old partner looking over your shoulder, maybe not. If it’s just you, go for it, because who cares?

    8. I’m late, but you can cover it with a dark, more sedate color regular polish, then take it off with nail polish remover without harming your gel manicure. Your manicure sounds awesome, just not appropriate.

11. I could use travel help from the vice! Husband and I are visiting DC for the weekend in December for a milestone birthday. After spending countless hours reading every hotel review site I could find, I have narrowed it down to Capella and the Four Seasons. Prices are similar and I can’t decide. We will be all over so location isn’t important. We really like a modern feel but cleanliness and luxury are also very important to us. Dislikes include anything frilly and bugs of any kind (I have an extreme phobia). Our normal favorite is the Manadarin Oriental but it doesn’t look like the DC location is up to par.

    Also open to suggestions for things to do while there or don’t miss restaurants (already planning to go to Momofuku).

    Thanks in advance!

    1. No advice on hotels since I live here, but I can do restaurants/other stuff!

       Momofuku justttt opened so it’s going to be crazy to get into, and I don’t know about the food yet. Heard mostly good things about Milk Bar though.

       Other restaurants:
       Splurge: Komi, Minibar
       Expensive: Rose’s Luxury (if you can wait in line), Rasika, Estadio, Fiola Mare, Partisan, Mintwood Place
       “Hip” mid-range: Maketto, Compass Rose, Red Hen, Bad Saint
       Cheap: Daikaya, Thip Kao
       Fast food: Shophouse, Cava Mezze, Sweetgreen

       Stuff to do:
       Kennedy Center – either for a real show, or Millenium Stage (free show at 6 pm every night)
       Portrait Gallery
       Visit the pandas at the National Zoo
       Depending on when you’re going in December, see the Christmas Tree outside of the White House
       Music – see if you like anyone playing at the 9:30 Club, Black Cat, or Lincoln Theater

    2. ugh momofuku is so overrated! and its not even a dc restaurant. Go to izakaya if you want the ramen and daikaya if you want the small plates. Rose luxury if you have time to wait, Kapnos has been delicious lately, Rasika is always great. I’ve always heard good things about the four seasons but haven’t been there to stay overnight.

    3. I would stay at the Park Hyatt as long as you can stay in a suite – the suite bathroom is amazing. I’ve staid at the DC Mandarin and I think the Park Hyatt is better. That said, I haven’t staid at the Four Seasons before so not sure how that comparison works. Even if you don’t stay at the Park Hyatt, you should consider going to their restaurant, the Blue Duck. It’s my favorite in DC. Daikaya I think is overrated but most restaurants in DC are. It’s not New York :( I second Rasika and Roses Luxury. I mentioned Blue Duck. You might also try Jose Andres Minibar, China Chicanna, or Oyamel. Also, Rouge 29 and Inn at Little Washington are great for very special occasions. In at Little Washington is a hike so most DC’ers book a car or limo to take them. There is a beer garden near 14th/Logan that’s popular these days, but the name escapes me….

       1. Oh and you might Komi too.

       2. Oops Rouge 24.

          1. Rouge 24 was the worst food and experience Ive ever had- truly the emperors new clothes of dining

       3. Agree on the Park Hyatt. It’s a gorgeous hotel. The Four Seasons in Georgetown is very very nice, but all Four Seasons are a bit corporate, so that’s what you get (don’t get me wrong, I love me a FS, but they’re first priority is serving business customers). You might also want to check out the Hay-Adams, which is a beautiful old hotel right across from the White House.

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