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Weekend Open Thread: Marianne Dress

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Something on your mind? Chat about it here.

This Doen dress caught my eye recently and I'm in love — the smocking looks comfortable but also flattering, and I like that the dress itself is neither too wide nor too slinky. It also looks like the kind of thing you could dress up for a night out with heels and a clutch, or dress down for runch with flat sandals and a big hat.

The striped dress is $298 at Nordstrom, but you can also find it in more colors at both NET-A-PORTER and Saks.

Looking for a dupe for less money? This $84 option from Banana Republic Factory looks promising (and comes in petites!), so does this $51 version at Nordstrom, and this Lands' End dress is similar.. This Pistola dress has more casual vibes but also looks lovely.

  • Nordstrom – The Half-Yearly Sale has started! See our roundup here. Good deals on Veronica Beard, Vince, Reiss (esp. coats), as well as Wit & Wisdom and NYDJ
  • Ann Taylor – 25% off + 30% off sale items
  • Bare Necessities – Up to 40% off, including tons of bra-sized swimwear (also, 10 panties for $10)
  • Boden – 15% off new women's wear styles with code
  • Express – $29 dresses and matching sets, and everything else buy 1 get 1 50% off
  • J.Crew – 20% off $200, including new styles
  • J.Crew Factory – Extra 50% off clearance + 40-60% off everything else
  • Loft – $35 jeans (5/29 only) + 60% off sale tops and dresses
  • M.M.LaFleur – Up to 70% off this weekend only! (Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off)
  • Nordstrom Rack – Clear the Rack! Nice selection of Vince, Veronica Beard, Reiss and Rag & Bone, a ton of affordable work basics from Calvin Klein and dresses from Maggy London, Eliza J, and Donna Morgan
  • Talbots – $99 dresses and sandals
  • Theory – 25% off sitewide (see our notes here)

    • 80 Comments

    1. member of the sandwich generation here. hosting mothers day dinner for 12. planning on grilling steaks and salmon, big salad, ice cream and brownies and fruit. What is an easy cooked vegetable that’s ok at room temperature and a side starch. was thinking about baked potatoes which i love but not sure if complicated for a huge crowd?

      1. For the veg, the Cookie & Kate green bean salad with toasted almonds and feta (I substitute goat cheese), or the Barefoot Contessa broccolini with balsamic vinaigrette. For the starch, cornbread or corn muffins.

      4. Potato salad. I prefer a vinaigrette-based dressing rather than mayo, but any version would work. Use small red or while boiling potatoes, cut in half or quarters after boiling and dress while warm.

            2. The Girard’s brand champagne vinaigrette is a nice, lightly mustardy classic vinaigrette and I’ve used it for potato salads before, it’s great.

      5. Baked potatoes for a crowd are roughly the same effort as baked potatoes for two. Once you’ve washed & poked them, it’s the same amount of time in the oven. I’d go with that. And asparagus is great at room temp. Look at Smitten Kitchen’s snacky asparagus for inspiration. Super easy, delicious with steak or salmon, and seasonally appropriate.

        1. cosign all of this, and wanted to say that the dip Smitten Kitchen talks about for her asparagus is good but not actually necessary. You can just do blanched asparagus (per the snacky asparagus recipe) drizzled with extra virgin olive oil and lemon juice and sprinkled with coarse salt. I also like to add some red pepper flakes, but the viability of that will depend on your crowd.

      7. Roasted baby carrots.

        Toss baby carrots with olive oil and a drizzle of maple syrup. Bake at 400.

      8. Grilled or roasted asparagus.
        Potato salad made with skin on new potatoes, minced shallot, and a vinaigrette of olive oil, apple cider vinegar, Dijon mustard and a fair bit of it, thyme, salt and pepper. This potato salad is much better at room temp than it is chilled.

      11. I like grilled or roasted vegetable mix–something like mushrooms, zucchini, onion, tomato, bell pepper. Can do as kebabs if you want.
        For a starch, I think baked potatoes are good and easy. I also like rice, mac and cheese, or corn casserole.

    2. TL; DR – how do you help people with early dementia who aren’t making good financial decisions?

      I believe my 80 yo mother is in the early stages of dementia. Among other signs, the most concerning is that she’s been falling for online scammers and giving her bank password out left and right to people promising her free money, waiting for boxes of $500k cash to show up in the mail. I have talked to her doctor and her lawyer – there’s nothing they can do professionally to help me get control of her finances, which is the biggest issue at the moment. If I call the bank and tell them what’s going on, will they freak out and unbank her? She won’t let me take control of her finances. Her bank has flagged her for suspicious activity numerous times.

        1. This. Ethical obligations to her make it pretty ethically murky for her lawyer to tell you about legal options to override her wishes. Your own lawyer can advise.

          1. OP here. Sorry, I meant to type “a lawyer.” I talked to HER doctor and A lawyer. The lawyer said there’s nothing that can be done right now under state laws.

      2. If she won’t sign a POA giving you authority, there’s nothing you can legally do. However, if it were me (and it has been me with another relative, although we have POA in her case), I would have zero (and I mean zero) qualms about sneaking onto her computer, unsubscribing her from scammy listserves, blocking certain websites, or anything else I could do behind the scenes.

        For my relative, we have had great success with the Truelink card, but that’s a bigger step for later down the line when you have legal authority.

        Do whatever you can to get a POA signed.

        2. Truelink is exactly the sort of the thing I was looking for. That’s merchant restriction is definitely needed – just have to think of a reason to tell her why her debit card needs to change. Thanks for sharing.

          1. If you haven’t come across it already, you will soon – “therapeutic fibbing” is very helpful for dementia parents. Tell her the bank sent a new card.

      3. Oh, I am terribly sorry. Unfortunately, no – if you call the bank they will not “freak out and unbank her”. You could talk with them to let them know the issues and to be on the look out for more suspicious ?large withdrawls. Maybe even ask them for advice?

        Did the lawyer have any advice? Can the lawyer be trusted to be a POA, if your Mom wont let you be one at the moment?

        1. Second this. Banks are very interested in helping customers avoid scams. Flagging the issue for the staff at the bank branch is a great first step. They may have other suggestions. I work at a large bank (not in a branch) and we frequently see branch co-workers commended for spotting troubling issues and foiling scammers.

      4. can you turn on 2FA for her bank the next time you’re over? just say that it’s a new security thing that was confusing for you and you wanted to help her with it?

        you might also want to draw up the paperwork for POA and so forth so you can have it ready to go? not sure if you need a notary for that.

      5. Does her doctor believe you? Is she not seeing a geriatrician or a behavioral neurologist?

        You didn’t mention social workers, any eldercare resources, or the Alzheimer’s Association. I might start by calling the Alzheimer’s Association’s caregiving line and going from there.

      6. Is she still living independently?

        I would try calling the local Department of Aging and ask for your Mom to have a social worker/case manager come out to assess her. Sounds like she may need services in the future, and they may have advice on how this is managed with other seniors.

        I would also consider having her seen by a Neurologist who specializes in Memory Disorders. The wait to get in to see these specialists can be up to a year in some places, so just make an appointment now. This really needs to be the first step if you are thinking about anything as extreme as Conservatorship down the road. But I am more hopeful that with time she will agree to make you POA. Keep trying.

        OP I am so sorry. I can just imagine how awful this is to deal with on your end. Hang in there.

      7. Get your mom to give you a POA and control of her accounts now before you get any kind of diagnosis. Took us a lot of cajoling and discussion and we got there. The easiest path is consent. Wishing you luck.

    3. is “designing your life” still one of the best resources for rethinking your life? any other good books or things to htink about?

      2. My most self-help, go to a retreat, navel-gazing friend got a lot out of this resource and still recommends it after exploring other things.

    4. Where is the cheapest place with the biggest selection of that sort of gauzy fabric (not linen) for men and women? Looking for my teen son. Some stores call it double cloth, others gauze. THe one that washes more easily than linen and is lighter weight than cotton?

    5. anyone else watch xo kitty? i know i’m not the target demographic but is it just junk or like deeply problematic. Q is choosing between a boyfriend who punched him and a boyfriend who is blackmailing him w private photos? how is this OK, what kind of example is this show?

      1. I was so confused until I realized there was a third season now!

        If they’re drawing on BL tropes, it’s probably just problematic. Those used to be pretty edgy. (Though wholesome, unproblematic BL narratives are becoming more of a thing lately.)

    6. TLDR: What topical actives do you love for anti-aging and fine lines that are becoming more prominent?

      I finally finished my bottle of tretinoin + niacinamide from Apostrophe, and I’m debating about finding another tret provider. I liked Apostrophe because I could get a one-off bottle for a reasonable price. Many of the other online services seem to force you to subscribe to receive a new bottle every 30 days.

      I tolerated the tret with no issues, but I’m also wondering if I should just go back to an alternative? I used Differin for about 6 months as a way to ease the ramp-up period on my way to tret.

      I currently rotate between several different actives and deep hydration options. I have Vitamin C from The Ordinary, Stridex for salycilic acid, and face masks for hydration. I used to use the tret + niacinamide 1x-2x/week (basically rotating with Vitamin C, a face mask, and giving my face a break every few days).

      My skin barrier is healthy and anti-aging/fine lines that are becoming more prominent is my main concern.

      1. The answer is Botox. Just like the answer to every weight loss question is a GLP1. Modern science has actually solved these problems. Topical solutions are just temporary at best and usually tossing money down the drain.

        1. Agree with this for fine lines. However, Vitamin C serums and prescription retinoid are good for other issues such as age spots and texture. I got tired of playing around and got a prescription retinoid from my dermatologist, the SkinCeuticals C E Ferulic (yes it is very expensive but it works that well on my skin), and a cheap cream for nighttime (I do cheap with Neutrogena but YMMV). And sunscreen always and forever.

        2. I feel differently about paralytic toxins vs. topping up on peptides our bodies are supposed to be producing when they’ve fallen short.

          I’m very in favor of medical anti-aging interventions (which I think would just be classified as “medicine” if it not for widespread medical age discrimination), but Botox has risks and outcomes that are really different from replenishing things we run short on as we get older or for whatever reason.

          1. I mean okay, but it’s what works. There’s risks to everything but they’re very low for both of those solutions. I just do not get the handwringing over either. Do what works, stop wasting time and money on things that don’t.

            1. It’s not just the statistically low risks of damage or myasthenia, it’s the risk of an outcome that we don’t find preferable to leaving the fine lines alone. So yes it works, but works at what? But yes if someone wants the promised outcome, and has no reason to suspect that they’re at elevated risk, they should go for the Botox. If someone wants to be able to use every muscle in their face for a full range of microexpressions, that’s inconsistent with how Botox works and they should try something else.

      2. My understanding is the tret is well-studied and has great evidence to support its use. I’m not aware of any other topical with good evidence of effectiveness, other than, of course, sun protection to prevent damage.

      3. I stopped using Vitamin C and started using a peptide cream. It’s better for wrinkles.

      4. just get the tretinoin, you only buy it when you need to and it’s way more powerful than anything sold without a scrip

      6. Threads about “anti-aging/fine lines” being a “concern” are acceptable but a woman describing herself as “strong. Like an ox” is an outrage? lol

        1. she called herself a T-rex in describing her body shape, which is what people were commenting on!

      7. If you go with botox, be prepared that eye droop can occur. I’m waiting it out now, the help with fine lines is not worth the 12 weeks of eye droop and looking like a half crazed pirate.

    7. what GLP-1 is everyone going for and where are they getting it? Was paying for Eli Lily but I feel like there are better deals than $400 for Zepbound. Was on Wegovy shots before but would be open to taking the pill but not shots. Also interested in the newer ones but I don’t think they’re out yet.

      1. Mobile Care LLC out of Denver, and tirzepatide. They are highly reputable and really know their stuff. Recommend.

      3. Better deals? Why risk yourself? I’m happy w the LilyDirect price and getting the real thing.

      4. I was on compounded semaglutide through Henrymeds and paid $300/mo, though I’ve stayed at a low dose and for the past 9 months just take it every other week, so I canceled and kept the bottles. Now that it’s run out, I’m considering Hers or Ro but have to price compare based on dosage.

        If you’re going compounded, don’t just look at the cheapest source. Check out where it’s compounded and their certificate of analysis to ensure it’s a regulated facility. I won’t buy meds from china for example.

        My husband was able to get his Zepbound covered for $30/month because he has sleep apnea and used the manufacturers coupon card. Depending on your situation, that could be an option.

      5. New ones aren’t out yet. Maybe end of this year but definitely next year. It will be super expensive though.

        Sounds like you should go on compound. Try Mochi or TryShed.com

    8. Help me shop? This is for a graduation party for my niece. The ceremony is in the evening and then we’ll be going out to dinner. I have very few details about level of fancy-ness, but my sense is that it’s the kind of occasion for a slightly formal sundress, if that makes sense?

      I know some of you are really talented at knowing what to wear for what occasion, and I admire It. I am not, and I feel really self-conscious about getting it right this time around.

      I’m 5’1″ and generally petite all around. I prefer not overly flouncy because I end up looking like a child. Otherwise, I’m really open, and I’m so grateful for any and all ideas.

      1. Check out what Gwyneth Paltrow just wore to her daughter’s graduation for inspo.

        1. GP is 5’9″, there a ton of things she can wear that would overwhelm someone who is 5’1″.
          If black is ok: https://bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=873128012&vid=3&searchText=cotton%20poplin%20dress&clickid=X%3AeTTH3FUxycW%3Ai1i1TFdX-xUkuUDD2RoxxtyI0&ap=6&siteID=brafcid383276&tid=braff010178#pdp-page-content
          Styled simply: https://www.meandem.com/us/in-bloom-floral-print-swing-dress-light-cream-multi
          I have this dress in a print from a few years ago and I wear it all the time: https://www.talbots.com/effortless-jersey-sleeveless-shift-dress—coastal-damask/P262036238.html?cgid=apparel-dresses&dwvar_P262036238_color=CATALINA%20BLUE%20MULTI&dwvar_P262036238_sizeType=MS#start=1&sz=54

      2. three options from JCrew that I can see here-

        https://www.jcrew.com/m/womens/categories/clothing/dresses-and-jumpsuits/ruched-midi-dress-in-stretch-cotton-blend-poplin/MQ056?display=standard&fit=Classic&color_name=brilliant-indigo&colorProductCode=CU798

        https://www.jcrew.com/p/womens/categories/clothing/dresses-and-jumpsuits/open-back-mixy-dress-in-gingham-cotton-blend-poplin/CV300?display=standard&fit=Classic&color_name=sky-blue-mixi&colorProductCode=CV300

        https://www.jcrew.com/m/womens/categories/clothing/dresses-and-jumpsuits/lina-smocked-midi-dress/ME850?display=standard&fit=Classic&color_name=navy&colorProductCode=CS967

    9. Someone was looking for a blue and white flouncy skirt, this one at Antro is 20% off with code Merrick20. Link in reply.

    10. Hi folks, career direction question here for anyone in/near the legal field.

      I’m a programmer and want to move out of software. Eventually I probably want to do a JD, but hoping to find adjacent work first to confirm that this really is where I want to be or get some other ideas before I invest that much into it. Are there any roles/niches where a software background is useful, or is my only option really to try for entry level legal assistant type jobs?

      1. maybe in the patent or copyright fields if they need a software expert to consult? don’t think of those as “typical” lawyer jobs, though. For patent law a PhD is basically a prereq for some areas.

        maybe a sales role at a software company marketed to attorneys (like AI software designed for the legal market)? you would hear about people’s workflows and how they work.

      2. Patent agent is the most common path for someone with your background. There’s a separate “patent bar” exam you can take as a non-lawyer that qualifies you to be a patent agent. Then if you get a JD you can become a patent attorney if you want (but plenty of people stay as career patent agents, the work is not that different after getting a JD). A PhD is only required for bio/chem backgrounds, not CS. I agree this is very different than other kinds of law though, so figuring out if you enjoy patent law is probably a first step.

    11. Ah, Mother’s Day. I don’t have a mom … actually, the truth is worse. I have a mom but she’s a monster. I guess I’m looking for some companionship or understanding in this. Happy Mother’s Day to all the people who look out for others, and also those who have freed ourselves from our monsters. And to anyone with a complicated relationship, you’re not alone in this.

      1. You are not alone! This can be a tough day for those without moms; I hope it went okay for you!

      2. It can be a very complex day, and it’s deeply kind of you to write this, so that someone might read this and feel seen. And for what it’s worth, this internet stranger sees you.

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