Weekend Open Thread: Marianne Dress
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This Doen dress caught my eye recently and I'm in love — the smocking looks comfortable but also flattering, and I like that the dress itself is neither too wide nor too slinky. It also looks like the kind of thing you could dress up for a night out with heels and a clutch, or dress down for runch with flat sandals and a big hat.
The striped dress is $298 at Nordstrom, but you can also find it in more colors at both NET-A-PORTER and Saks.
Looking for a dupe for less money? This $84 option from Banana Republic Factory looks promising (and comes in petites!), so does this $51 version at Nordstrom, and this Lands' End dress is similar.. This Pistola dress has more casual vibes but also looks lovely.
member of the sandwich generation here. hosting mothers day dinner for 12. planning on grilling steaks and salmon, big salad, ice cream and brownies and fruit. What is an easy cooked vegetable that’s ok at room temperature and a side starch. was thinking about baked potatoes which i love but not sure if complicated for a huge crowd?
For the veg, the Cookie & Kate green bean salad with toasted almonds and feta (I substitute goat cheese), or the Barefoot Contessa broccolini with balsamic vinaigrette. For the starch, cornbread or corn muffins.
rice casserole?
Asparagus?
Potato salad. I prefer a vinaigrette-based dressing rather than mayo, but any version would work. Use small red or while boiling potatoes, cut in half or quarters after boiling and dress while warm.
Not OP but any fave recipes for that dressing?
A mustardy vinaigrette works best.
Yes, any recipes for that?
Baked potatoes for a crowd are roughly the same effort as baked potatoes for two. Once you’ve washed & poked them, it’s the same amount of time in the oven. I’d go with that. And asparagus is great at room temp. Look at Smitten Kitchen’s snacky asparagus for inspiration. Super easy, delicious with steak or salmon, and seasonally appropriate.
cosign all of this, and wanted to say that the dip Smitten Kitchen talks about for her asparagus is good but not actually necessary. You can just do blanched asparagus (per the snacky asparagus recipe) drizzled with extra virgin olive oil and lemon juice and sprinkled with coarse salt. I also like to add some red pepper flakes, but the viability of that will depend on your crowd.
Corn on the cob?
Roasted baby carrots.
Toss baby carrots with olive oil and a drizzle of maple syrup. Bake at 400.
Grilled or roasted asparagus.
Potato salad made with skin on new potatoes, minced shallot, and a vinaigrette of olive oil, apple cider vinegar, Dijon mustard and a fair bit of it, thyme, salt and pepper. This potato salad is much better at room temp than it is chilled.
TL; DR – how do you help people with early dementia who aren’t making good financial decisions?
I believe my 80 yo mother is in the early stages of dementia. Among other signs, the most concerning is that she’s been falling for online scammers and giving her bank password out left and right to people promising her free money, waiting for boxes of $500k cash to show up in the mail. I have talked to her doctor and her lawyer – there’s nothing they can do professionally to help me get control of her finances, which is the biggest issue at the moment. If I call the bank and tell them what’s going on, will they freak out and unbank her? She won’t let me take control of her finances. Her bank has flagged her for suspicious activity numerous times.
I would have a consultation with a lawyer of your own.
This. Ethical obligations to her make it pretty ethically murky for her lawyer to tell you about legal options to override her wishes. Your own lawyer can advise.
OP here. Sorry, I meant to type “a lawyer.” I talked to HER doctor and A lawyer. The lawyer said there’s nothing that can be done right now under state laws.
If she won’t sign a POA giving you authority, there’s nothing you can legally do. However, if it were me (and it has been me with another relative, although we have POA in her case), I would have zero (and I mean zero) qualms about sneaking onto her computer, unsubscribing her from scammy listserves, blocking certain websites, or anything else I could do behind the scenes.
For my relative, we have had great success with the Truelink card, but that’s a bigger step for later down the line when you have legal authority.
Do whatever you can to get a POA signed.
Legal options include filing for a conservatorship.
Truelink is exactly the sort of the thing I was looking for. That’s merchant restriction is definitely needed – just have to think of a reason to tell her why her debit card needs to change. Thanks for sharing.
If you haven’t come across it already, you will soon – “therapeutic fibbing” is very helpful for dementia parents. Tell her the bank sent a new card.
Oh, I am terribly sorry. Unfortunately, no – if you call the bank they will not “freak out and unbank her”. You could talk with them to let them know the issues and to be on the look out for more suspicious ?large withdrawls. Maybe even ask them for advice?
Did the lawyer have any advice? Can the lawyer be trusted to be a POA, if your Mom wont let you be one at the moment?
Second this. Banks are very interested in helping customers avoid scams. Flagging the issue for the staff at the bank branch is a great first step. They may have other suggestions. I work at a large bank (not in a branch) and we frequently see branch co-workers commended for spotting troubling issues and foiling scammers.
can you turn on 2FA for her bank the next time you’re over? just say that it’s a new security thing that was confusing for you and you wanted to help her with it?
you might also want to draw up the paperwork for POA and so forth so you can have it ready to go? not sure if you need a notary for that.
Does her doctor believe you? Is she not seeing a geriatrician or a behavioral neurologist?
You didn’t mention social workers, any eldercare resources, or the Alzheimer’s Association. I might start by calling the Alzheimer’s Association’s caregiving line and going from there.
is “designing your life” still one of the best resources for rethinking your life? any other good books or things to htink about?
Where is the cheapest place with the biggest selection of that sort of gauzy fabric (not linen) for men and women? Looking for my teen son. Some stores call it double cloth, others gauze. THe one that washes more easily than linen and is lighter weight than cotton?
Old navy
anyone else watch xo kitty? i know i’m not the target demographic but is it just junk or like deeply problematic. Q is choosing between a boyfriend who punched him and a boyfriend who is blackmailing him w private photos? how is this OK, what kind of example is this show?
I was so confused until I realized there was a third season now!
If they’re drawing on BL tropes, it’s probably just problematic. Those used to be pretty edgy. (Though wholesome, unproblematic BL narratives are becoming more of a thing lately.)