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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 184 Comments · by

Splurge Monday’s TPS Report: Short Sleeve Crepe Jersey Dress

The Personal Shopper (TPS)

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Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. Donna Karan Collection Short Sleeve Crepe Jersey DressWow. Wowza. Gorgeous dress from Donna Karan. It's a lovely jeweled hue, in a subtly textured crepe, with a perfect ruched/wrapped/almost asymmetric chic about it. Lovely. (It almost reminds me a bit of a higher-priced version of this reader favorite.) This one is definitely a splurge, though: it's $1,995 at Nordstrom. Donna Karan Collection Short Sleeve Crepe Jersey Dress Seen a great piece you'd like to recommend? Please e-mail [email protected]. (L-3)

Sales of note for 9.10.24

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Comments

  1. Can someone style a jacket / cardi for this?

    This is lovely (although the other dress is a wonderful alternative). Can someone style a jacket / cardi that would work well with this?

    I might get the less expensive one, but in a freezing office, it would be sitting lonely once fall hits.

    Signed,
    Need Garanimals for Adults

    • AMB

      Something in an asymmetrical zip/tweed like the jackets on CapHillStyle this morning?

  2. TPS needed

    I am looking for a quality black ‘drapey’ cardigan (not the button-up). Any recommendations? I would be wearing this at work, so the nicer, the better. Thanks!

  3. Roeslein

    It’s a pretty dress, but it’s obviously un unflattering length on the (presumably tall) model, so how will it look on someone who is not 5’11”?

    • Ellen

      I agree. Shorter peeople like me can NOT pull this off, but Rosa probabley can. I have agreat story to tell about the weekend. Sam was a bit of a dork with Dad, but Dad seems to like him and made him a confidential proposition that Sam said involved me. Sam did tell me that he has a list of thing’s that Dad wants him to satisfy with b/f he will let Sam marry me. I was MORTIFIED, b/c I have not realy even dated Sam yet, let alone talked seriously about marrage. FOOEY!

      The most detailed thing I told him about was Grandma Leyeh’s proposition and I saw (INADVERTEANTLY) Sam’s winkie when he sat down Indian Style on my carpet. So I do NOT think I am ready for marrage, tho I do want the $50K. I have a big depo to prepare for so I will catch you up later. YAY!

    • Diana Barry

      Really? I love the length – it is long enough for work for tall people!

      • emeralds

        I actually love the length. I think it looks very demure and ladylike. I’d still have to get it hemmed (in that parallel universe where I would spend $2,000 on a dress), since I’m 5’4, but I’d like to see more designers offering longer lengths like that.

        • RED

          Agreed. Over-the-knee hemlines paired with pumps can be elongating on petites (i.e., 5’3″/5’4″ and below). There is no need to go above-the-knee all the time.

        • zora

          I think the longer length looks more elegant and professional, too. And a lot easier to deal with because it’s not hiking up everytime you sit down!! I also wish there were more dresses in this length at lower price points.

      • Anonymous

        I never understood why more dresses aren’t longer – anyone can get a dress hemmed but I can’t add length to make it more appropriate and as a result rarely buy dresses. I would have so many more if they were longer. Does anyone have any good sources for long dresses? Asos midi’s are good, Boden talls, any others?

        • Mpls

          I’ve had decent luck with the Lauren Ralph Lauren (Green label) dresses hitting at knee length pretty reliably.

  4. Diana Barry

    BODEN CLOTHING REVIEW from fall line:

    For reference, I wear an 8 in J Crew jackets and a 6 in their pants. I have broadish shoulders and 32DD/E bust, otherwise pretty straight figure, and am medium tall.

    Must Have Tunic – 8 – got this in purple. It fits well and is nice and easy for weekends – more like a minidress than a tunic – but am not sure I am going to keep it because the birds make it too Portlandia, maybe.
    Chepstow Top – 8 – red – too loose all over, except the shoulders, and my husband hated the pattern mixing – looks a little “Holly Hobby”, to paraphrase Tim Gunn.
    Edie Dress – got this in 8R, the purple with allium print. The print is gorgeous but I am not keeping it – it is too small/low cut over the bust, but big through the waist/hips, and if I sized up it would look weird. Would work for smaller busted and/or pear ladies, and for more casual offices; on me it looked more like a dress to wear to church/party.
    Holborn Dress – got in a 6L and 8L in red. The 6 looked AWESOME but too s*xy for work. The 8 was too baggy/boxy.
    Preppy Blazer -8 – grey – nice color but waaaay too itchy, also it had that weird thing where the piping doesn’t go all the way around the bottom.
    Metropolitan Bag – tan – not big enough for a regular purse for me.
    Alexa Dress – grey – 6L – am keeping, v nice for work. May look awkward with a blazer, but I will probably just keep the blazer on my chair.
    Notre Dame Skirt – tweed – 6L – slightly too tight and ITCHY, even through the lining.
    Smocked Shoulder Tunic – dark red – 8 – very nice for weekends, more of a true tunic.

    • Cb

      Thanks for the Boden reviews. I tend to place big orders and return about 80%. I find their sizing so all over the place.

    • OHCFO

      Funny, I was thinking about doing a Boden review today too! I just got the breadwinner ponte knit pencil skirt and Amalfi blouse in the mail last week. Wearing them today together and loooooove them. I’ve had more complements on my outfit today than I can remember. I am 5’7″ and got the skirt in long instead of regular because they didn’t have my size otherwise. Figured I’d hem it. It’s perfect as-is. Just ordered another Amalfi blouse.

      • a.k.

        Interesting! what color of the Amalfi blouse did you get? I just sent one back because it was too transparent for my liking, but I did love the fit.

        • OHCFO

          I got the grey, and have just ordered orangy-red one that’s on clearance. I wore a white cami underneath because yes… very sheer. But I do love it!

  5. AIMS

    I like the color but it seems very body conscious on the the model.

    Styling help needed. I have this skirt that I bought years ago (link below) – it was probably a mistake but I am a sucker for anything paisley and it looks nicer than the picture: knee length, loose, pleated. I bought it because it’s comfy and I figured I could wear it to work on non-formal days and it would transition nicely to post-work, too. But I can’t seem to ever make it work. Wearing it with all black seems boring, wearing it with one of the colors in the paisley seems boring and also way too matchy matchy. The only way that it sort of works is with something stone colored (slate?) thrown in the mix to temper all the colors but I’m looking for other ideas. Any help would be appreciated or should I just try to sell it on e-bay (since I paid about $25 for it way back when it just might be a good idea)… It’s been like 3 years and I have worn it maybe 5 times.
    http://compare.ebay.com/like/400556681826?var=lv&ltyp=AllFixedPriceItemTypes&var=sbar

    • Bonnie

      I think it would look great if you pull out multiple colors from the skirt. E.g. you could wear a light blue shirt and a necklace or shoes in the cobalt.

    • Cat

      Chambray or a blue oxford might pick up the light blue in the paisley but serve as a nice contrast/not super matchy since it’s the minority color? Also a white collared shirt looks great with patterns IMO, very Carolina if you can pull it off :)

    • hellskitchen

      Since the overall color looks to be a shade of purple (at least in the pics) I’d wear it with a fitted cardigan or sweater in a deep, rich olive

    • MissK

      I’m going to second wearing this with blues, since it’s the less prominent color. I think you could get away with wearing multiple blue shades at once, like a dark blue blouse with lighter blue accessories.

      Also like Cat said, I’m a fan of a slim white blouse with a fuller skirt, if it works for you.

    • Calibrachoa

      I’d say blue, too – light blue shirt and darker blue accessories come to mind.

    • Monday

      For days off: with a fitted heather gray or heather oatmeal top (t-shirt or cardigan?) tucked in and potentially belted, and boots. Maybe a long necklace or chunky watch for accessories (and season-appropriate fedora?)

    • AIMS

      I knew I came to the right place. These are awesome ideas, thank you!
      I really, really love all these options. I think a chambray shirt and bright blue heels could definitely spruce it up without being too matchy, I will try other blues, too. I also love the idea of this paired with a heather blazer and I feel like oatmeal top and some fun boots could definitely work. I also would have never thought to try it with olive but that may just be the thing for fall, maybe with a white blouse… Now, I just want to go home and try all these things on instead of, you know, working…

  6. Duckie

    Early threadjack before I forget again…

    Does anyone have any recommendations for a financial planner and/or tax accountant in the DC/NoVA area? Our dual-income is around $350K and my husband’s tax situation is more complicated than mine due to out of state rental properties, so I think it’s time to seek some outside help and go beyond putting my ‘extra’ cash in Vanguard.

    Thanks!

    • Hi

      I know you said DC/NoVA, but we use Thomas Fautrel at Morgan Stanley in Bethesda and have been very happy with him. Dual income in a similar range as yours. We also had out of state rental properties as well.

    • Bonnie

      Chris Macnamara with Merrill Lynch in Tyson’s Corner. I have complete faith in him and his practice group.

    • anon

      Homes Lowry Horn and Johnson near Fair Lakes. Small firm, great service. As a bonus, their current management is very female-heavy.

  7. Non-compete question

    Threadjack ..
    I was in the interview process for a new job and just got a verbal offer today morning.
    However, I have a 6 month non-compete agreement with my current employer that would most likely be enforced if I were to leave. The new company is okay with this. The bigger problem is that is I am on an employer sponsored work visa and the green card process that will be stuck in backlog for several years to come.

    I need to speak to a lawyer who is familiar with both areas (non-competes, employer sponsored immigration) to discuss my options before I go further with the new offer. I need some independent opinion where the lawyer is not working for my current or new employer.
    How should I search for one, someone who does such individual consultation? Any website listing? Or if you ladies can recommend someone, that would be extremely helpful. I am in Chicago, new job is in New York in the financial industry.

    Thanks a lot in advance.

    • Anonymous

      Try asking new company if their employment counsel can recommend someone. If I were you, I’d focus on immigration expertise because your interests and the new company’s are more aligned on the noncompete point. You could also check out a ranking list for Chicago “Super Lawyers.” Those lists are by no means perfect (or exhaustive), but they can be a start.

    • Sam

      Not answering your question, but I’ve been through the green card long haul (changed jobs; gotten married; traveled internationally; worked in NY in finance – through the process) and I strongly suggest reading up on immigration forums including immihelp. Sometimes I found that the immigration lawyers got things wrong or didn’t have enough experience, and I’m glad I looked things up myself.

    • Bewitched

      I recommend Bryan McGowan-he’s in Portland, OR but your issues could definitely be handled via phone/fax. Fees would probably be quite reasonable compared to Chicago or NY! The Immigration Law Office of Bryan McGowan

      1001 SW Fifth Avenue, Suite 1205

      Portland, OR 97204

      Office: 503-222-9900

      Office: 503-222-5420

      • State bar police

        Hang on! An Oregon attorney may not be able to give advice to someone in Chicago. He should be licensed in Illinois. If not, he’d be engaging in the unauthorized practice of law. That’t not to say that some lawyers wouldn’t do it.

        • Bewitched

          Immigration lawyers licensed in any state can file papers with (1) the Department of Homeland
          Security (DHS), (2) the United States Citizenship and Immigration Service (USCIS), and 3) the Board of Immigration Appeals. They may need to partner with local counsel if there are any IL specific issues.

        • Solo Practitioner

          Immigration lawyers are not subject to this requirement. They can have clients anywhere.

          Also, UPL has to do with where the attorney is actually sitting… not where the client is. So if the lawyer has an office in Portland, and is licensed in Portland, he can advise someone in Chicago. It may be malpractice to advise about Illinois law, but it’s not UPL.

    • OP

      thanks all for the suggestions, will be contacting them.

      Sam, great to know someone who has been through this process. I agree immigration message boards are very helpful, I used them extensively during the perm application to make sure I understand and review everything the lawyers send over. I couldn’t find much direct related information on non-compete + visas. My company has screwed people over on non-competes in the past if they want to get vicious so I want to tread carefully since I am more at their mercy due to immigration stuff.
      The new offer is definitely attractive at the first shot (will still negotiate few items after all the advice seen here), would be a good next step in my career and I am excited to move to NY if it all works out

    • anon

      Amy Dalal at Ogletree. They do a lot of employer work, though, so prepare for them to be conflicted out.

      Irina Plumlee at Munsch Hardt.

  8. Interview suit

    I have an interview today in a conservative industry (think law/banking). I’m wearing a classic navy skirt suit and white button front shirt. Question: Do I button the jacket (two button) or not? Or button when standing and unbutton when sitting (as men are supposed to)? The fit in the backside is not as good as it could be (I didn’t get a chance to buy a better suit) so it hangs better unbuttoned, but is this too informal?

    • Cat

      I just leave mine unbuttoned (law) – more flattering open, and one less thing to keep track of when interviewing.

    • anne-on

      I’d button when standing, unbutton when sitting as men do, especially with a skirt suit.

    • Kate

      Is there a general rule for women’s suits regarding the button issue? I got a new suit with a two-button jacket for an interview, but I’m waiting on a different size of pants before I try it all together and I’m not sure what will look the most flattering button-wise. If all the different options look decent, which way (unbuttoned, one button, two button) is the most “professional?”

    • Susie

      Interesting, if wearing a full suit I always button. Didn’t know men were supposed to unbutton while sitting.

      • TBK

        Watch Mad Men. The men always unbutton when sitting, and re-button when standing. (Not that I’m saying Mad Men makes the rules. It’s just an example of the rules in practice.) Some of my jackets just don’t fit right if they’re buttoned when I’m sitting but look much better buttoned, or semi-buttoned when I’m standing.

        • Mpls

          Suit jackets are not tailored to fit while sitting – you would need to unbutton them to keep them from pulling funny and the shoulders from bunching up near your ears.

    • Breadwinner Mom

      Don’t button… depending, perhaps, on your seniority. A woman with a buttoned suit should either be very senior or walking to a podium to make a presentation. Otherwise, you risk looking stuffy at worst and not stylish at best. But I agree that buttoning while standing is better than buttoning while sitting.

      • Meep

        I generally agree with this. I work with a lot of audit firm and law firm partners and the ones who tend to button while standing are the “always in a super conservative navy suit” types. It looks ok on them because it fits their personalities.

        My advice is, if you feel more confident buttoned then button. If you feel more confident unbuttoned don’t button. You can’t come accross as too conservative during the interview process in law/banking but I can’t see the button/don’t button issue being a dealbreaker. I think this is a case of confidence trumping convention.

  9. Silver Water??

    Reporting from the weekend thread…

    Has anyone successfully tried Silver Water to treat scarring alopecia or other kind of hair loss? I have read about it but it’s not a well researched solution so I wondered if anyone has a personal anecdote to share

    • Silvercurls

      Have you searched online for alopecia or related-issue support groups? Perhaps a site more closely focused on your topic would yield more information. Good luck; please update us if you find anything.

  10. anne-on

    Could anyone recommend a good quality long sleeved silk blouse (ideally something like the JCrew blouse Kat picked last week) in a rich brown or a grey? An ivory blouse would work but I’d prefer not to have to wear a cami with it. I’m looking for something to round out my fall wardrobe and find something to go with both an emerald green and a reddish orange skirt. Prefer to keep it $150 or below. Thanks!

  11. one and done

    One and done. That’s what we keep saying. We have careers we want to pursue, a 3 year old that is already a handful, we are 35 and 40 so age is a consideration, neither of us feels like something is missing, etc. So after a wicked week of PMS to the point that I finally told DH that I was concerned I should take a test, shouldn’t I be relieved when I started? Instead, there is a part of me that is kinda sad and it really surprises me. Not really looking for advice, just needed to get this out of my head.

    • Anon

      No advice, but I know how you feel. We aren’t TTC and are actively preventing pregnancy, and I still have a little pang of “damn, the BC worked” every time I start.

  12. Calibrachoa

    The dress is gorgeous..alas, out of my reach but a girl can dream!

    I havea question about suiting separates – what do you do when they have different caretaking instructions? My shiny (not literally!) new suit from Evans has a dryclean only jacket but the variety of bottoms they offer are all machine washable. How do I keep them from wearing differently?

    • LizNYC

      How do you like Evans? I keep looking at their stuff, but haven’t ordered. I’m not sure what their sizing is. (For example, I find Lane Bryant to be too “hippy” on me, but Talbots stuff to fit perfectly.)

      • Calibrachoa

        I like them a lot! I am not sure how to describe the sizing, either, since I’m on their side of the pond so I’m not used to LB or Talbot sizing. I wear a UK28 on top and a 24 at the bottom and they have a really good fit. Most of the stuff from Evans wears really well, but I’ve had bad luck with some casual pants and jeans tearing easily – but that might just be the kind of wear I put causal items through. Overall, the quality is okay but I tend to wait for sales.

    • Mpls

      Is the fiber content different? Because if it is, then you probably aren’t going to be able to do anything about them wearing differently.

      If the fiber content is the same, then clean them the same – either dry clean them both or wash them both. I’m guessing that the jacket isn’t REALLY dry clean only, but the care needed to make sure it keeps it’s shape (like the shoulders and lapels) works best when done by professional cleaners. A pro can probably make sure it is pressed properly too.

      • Calibrachoa

        Well the website says the jacket is machine washable but the label on the inside says dry clean only… so you are probably right. They are all a polyester/viscose/elastane mix in the same proportions so different fiber content is not an issue.

        .. that or I will just end up with so many different bottoms that they will look about the same as the much less often cleaned jacket.

  13. Cleaning Service

    Anyone have a housecleaning service or cleaning person they like in Northern Virginia/DC? After several laundry mishaps and a blatant lie (I was told a new woman was being sent to do the cleaning since I was not happy about the three clothing items that had been ruined in the wash on three separate occasions, but it turns out it’s been the same woman all along), I’m done with my current service. Also, I’d be interested to hear what people pay for an every other week cleaning including laundry for a roughly 2,000 sqft house. Thanks!

    • Senior Attorney

      I’m not in your area, but I can’t help chiming in to say that I gave up on having the house cleaners do laundry a long time ago. If you really don’t want to do it, send it out and let your house cleaner concentrate on cleaning the house. I promise you’ll have fewer headaches overall.

    • Frugal doc..

      I think laundry is rough. I have to hand-hold/train new people in laundry. Sorry to tell you this, but this is a minimum wage worker, using different machines in different houses, and with differing expectations… it’s asking for trouble. If she’s doing work clothes, delicates, and possibly ironing/steaming… that’s pretty skilled in my book. But if she is mostly doing “family weekend” stuff… ie. relieving working Mom (Dad) from taking care of all the kid’s dirty clothes… then just find a new team and warn them laundry is a major concern from your last help.

      So whenever we have someone new, I have to be there for several times to go through the routine. And they still don’t do what they are supposed to do, and they still make mistakes. My friends/family members who have less difficulties are those with full time help (ex. live-ins/nannies, or full time caretakers), so that there is more oversight/communication.

      I would also be furious with your service and would leave after they admitted lying to you, and put an appropriate review/criticism on Angie’s list so others know.

      • Cleaning Service

        We separate lights and darks and tell her to do them all on cold/cold with low heat on the dryer. No ironing required. She has taken things that weren’t in the hamper and put them in the wash (even though they’re non-washable, which is why they weren’t in the hamper), gotten weird discolorations on something else, and got bleach spots on a pair of red pants (we have never used bleach in our washer so I don’t know where it came from). These are really, really basic issues.

    • Anonymous

      Can’t speak to the laundry piece, but we pay $100/twice monthly to clean approx. 2,000 sf. 2 FB.

    • Pest

      My cleaning service does not do laundry. I have tried to get them to do ironing and they won’t do it because they say the liability is too much for them.

  14. Julia

    Interview suit: You should always leave the bottom button unbuttoned, (as men do) so maybe it will look OK when you are seated.

    Calibrachoa: I would dry clean both pieces, and always together. Unless you spill something on your suit or perspire very heavily, (and you can take care of that with a good choice of underpinnings) you should only have to clean a suit infrequently. Dry cleaning is hard on clothing.

  15. Baconpancakes

    I had an argument with a friend of mine this weekend about interview attire. Thanks to thissite, I firmly believe in the conservative skirt suit with hose after October, low heels, a small dark bag, and conservative jewelry for the interview, because when I’m interviewing, I want the job, and I don’t want to distract from my credentials.

    However, my friend argued that while that may be The Way It Is, it perhaps shouldn’t be. When interviewing for a business casual office that quite literally never requires a suit, why should she have to wear a suit to the interview? She pointed out that many interviewers don’t wear suits, so clearly it’s not an important, formal occasion. She felt that it was a false portrayal, and felt it was a relic of an older age, when almost every office did require suits every day.

    What do you ladies think? If we’re not in law or banking or a similarly formal company, why should we still expect interviewers to Suit Up?

    • Anon

      Because it shows that you know how to bring your A-Game when it counts.

      Signed, In-House, business casual, and we knock people who don’t wear full suits for interviews (even if they interview on a casual friday when we are in jeans)

      • Anon in NYC

        We had someone interview in a nice, formal dress (looked like it could have been part of a suit), but some people still noticed that they weren’t wearing a blazer. I think it’s definitely a know-your-industry kind of thing, but unless someone made it clear that I should not wear a suit to an interview I would default to a suit.

    • LizNYC

      There’s a definite difference between what people in the office wear everyday versus what you’re expected to wear in the office (one exception to this *might* be tech startups where everyone wears hoodies and jeans, but I don’t work at such a place, so I don’t know).

      When I was interviewing last year, I knew a suit was expected (or a blazer & pants/skirt combo) where I was interviewing, even when I knew that the office culture was business casual day to day. Even when the interviewer was wearing Pumas and a t-shirt.

      • Elysian

        A friend I know interviewed at a tech startup where he was specifically told not to wear a suit. He later found out they basically ding people who DO wear suits, because they think those people don’t understand the industry. So yeah, there’s that.

    • Mpls

      The interviewer isn’t the one asking for a job, you are. So you wear a suit to show you are taking this interview seriously, to show that you understand business conventions and can conform when necessary.

    • mascot

      This is a know your industry issue. My husband works in the industrial/construction industry and for many positions, a suit for an interview would be a ding. I am in law though, so I expect my interviewees to suit up, even though I don’t.

      • Diana Barry

        +1. Some tech companies might also ding applicants for wearing suits, but I think for the vast majority of office jobs, suits are necessary.

      • Lynnet

        My husband (an engineer) got dinged in an interview for wearing a sports coat and dress slacks. They thought he was too formal and wouldn’t fit in with the company culture. He ultimately got the job, but only after they called his references specifically to ask if he had a sense of humor… I think whether you should wear a suit to an interview is very industry specific.

      • Agreed

        I agree with this. After college, many of my first interviews were at manufacturing firms. I showed up in my conservative black J Crew suit, decked out with formal jewelery and a basic bag / portfolio. Then I was given a hard hat and taken on a tour of the factory. I completely stood out! I didn’t get any of those jobs and what I did land in that get-up was a job at a BANK. The person who hired me for the banking job often joked (after hiring me) that I was hired because “I had a nice suit and he just knew I would fit into their culture.”

    • SP

      I think interviewing is all about showing that you are able to figure out what is appropriate for a situation and do it well. Suits are one indicator of that in my book.

    • Baconpancakes

      I should have specified – this is more of a philosophical question. It’s definitely expected to wear a suit to an interview – but why? Why is it still a business convention when business has changed so much?

      • Veronique

        I’d argue that it’s easier to have one convention for most situations/industries (wear suits to interviews) than to have to dress in accordance with the job that you are applying for. Actual dress codes vary so much by industry, position and location that it would be way more difficult to have to research the dress code before you even interview. We already have regular posts asking what to wear on the first day of work, which is usually after the poster has been in the office and interviewed with other employees. Can you imagine having to figure that out sight unseen?

        Plus, people tend to dress more conservatively at the beginning of a new job, even when they know the dress code. The same tendency applies to interviews, so I’m not sure how much interview outfits would change even if the accepted interview dress code changed. I doubt most people would dress more casually than blazer/suit separates or a dress and blazer.

      • Niktaw

        Why do brides still wear white in most of the Western world? There is no expectation of v!rginity anymore and the institute of marriage has changed greatly.

        • Baconpancakes

          Ha, good point. But I think most brides wear white because most women look beautiful in white, and when else are you going to get to throw practicality out the window with an absurd white dress?

          I’m mostly curious about this because we’ve changed a lot of expectations in the workplace. Working from home used to only be something writers and artists did, but now tons of people do it, so my friend’s objections did make me wonder why we’ve stuck with this tradition.

        • Alanna of Trebond

          I actually think that many brides would look much better in a different color than white.

    • Calibrachoa

      It probably says a LOT that when I interviewed for a tech company they mentioned in their interview invite that they have a casual dress code and I should wear whatever is “Comfortable” – with “Smart casual, a suit, etc” in parenthesis afterwards. You can imagine what sort of a headache this gave me…

    • Brant

      How old is your friend? I work in a casual office in an industry that is casual/biz casual. Jeans are OK in my office; men typically wear polos or maybe a button down shirt with no tie and jeans.

      When we do client visits, we either do nice business casual (skirt/cardi for women, khakis and a shirt/blazer no tie for men) or wear suits depending on the client type.

      Even though I may be interviewing you in jeans or a wrap dress, I will absolutely ding you for not showing up in a suit or well done suit separates.

      • Brant

        I should add that I do not work for a hoodie-jeans-and-sneakers startup/tech company. Hoodies are beyond the scope of our “neat casual” dress code.

        I’m in Boston, too, so that probably adds to my suit snobbery.

      • Baconpancakes

        She’s pretty young, but she works in-house in events management. Since the only time she meets with clients is at events where she’s expected to wear a c*cktail dress, she literally never has to wear a suit to work.

    • Niktaw

      Interviewers or people being interviewed?
      My workplace is business casual on the more casual side of the spectrum, but I admit that I expect job candidates to suit up. Failure to do so in my eyes equals not being serious about the interview or the job.

      I make allowances for accessories though. OK for a candidate to wear pumps or a bag in a color, as long as they are in good condition and devoid of platforms, lucite and mega-bling.

      • Lynnet

        I’m confused, what would a candidate wear other than pumps? And why on earth would they be dinged for a bag in color?

        • Veronique

          I think “in a color” applies to both bags and pumps. It’s ok for a candidate to wear pumps in a color.

    • TBK

      An interview is a formal business occasion. Formal business dress is a suit. Why do many men still wear tuxes to get married when men almost never wear tuxes as evening dress anymore (even though that’s the appropriate post-5:00pm attire)? Because it’s the most formal day of their lives. Saying “don’t judge a book by its cover” can be misleading when the book is picking its own cover. Aside from providing warmth, the most important thing clothing does (in pretty much all human society) is provide non-verbal messages about the wearer, who she is, how she wishes to be seen, and what she wants to communicate to the people around her. A woman putting on a suit for an interview says that she wants to show respect for the employer, that she understands and can successfully navigate business norms, and that she views the interview as important. Sure, we could say that from now on the clothes that we wear for that message is an orange bathing suit and a tutu, but that’s not what our current clothes language says.

    • Anonymous

      My mom is a doctor whose practice generally wears business casual clothes everyday. She recently rejected a potential doctor who spoke a needed language, partially because she wasn’t wearing a suit. She felt is seemed like the candidate was not serious or dedicated enough for the job, and that they should have been more professional and bring their “A-game” for an interview at least.

  16. Empty Nesters Dine in NYC

    Thanks to everyone for the suggestions. After a long day of wandering lower Manhattan, we ended up at Prima at what is NOT a civilized dinner hour. I know because: (1) it was still happy hour, and (2) it was empty and we got our choice of tables, lingered, and still were out before they needed it for the first reservation. Food was great, it was quiet and we were able to have a special time, and the drinks were cool. Thanks, again.

    • AIMS

      So glad you enjoyed it. Prima is one of the few places where I really, really, really love the c*cktails. Most of the time when I get a mixed drink, I just think, “why did I bother?” but their drinks are just excellent.

      • Empty Nesters Dine in NYC

        Totally. I had one with Prosecco, hibiscus and agave. Actually, I had two. My husband’s cocktails were also interesting.

  17. ANP

    Just did a big cleanout of the hubby’s car this weekend and came up with a bunch of CDs. What do you all do with your CD collections? We probably have ~300 between the two of us but honestly, I listen to iTunes on shuffle or Pandora/Spotify most days. We haven’t burned every CD to our iTunes collection but it feels uber-wasteful to toss them. Thoughts?

    • ss

      Perhaps take them round to a secondhand dealer ? You’re unlikely to get a lot of $$ for them but they’re more likely to end up in the hands of someone who enjoys them (I speak as someone who lives with rooms lined with records and CDs, many of bought secondhand in exotic places, and which my hubby prefers over digital files for his big-boy stereo).

    • Wildkitten

      Personally, I find it more wasteful to let them take up space in your home that could be filled with someone useful you enjoy.

  18. Nine Days Late

    My period is nine days late. I’ve been off the pill for six months and am normally punctual. I’ve taken three pregnancy tests and they all came back negative. We aren’t TTC right now but it wouldn’t be the end of the world if I am pregnant. I have my annual exam with my doctor later this week. Would she be able to do a conclusive test?

    • sharpest

      She can do a blood test for the pregnancy hormone. I don’t know if it’s 100% accurate, but it should be pretty close to that. Also, if you’re more than 9 days late she might also be able to do an ultrasound to see if there’s anything in there.

      • anon

        Definitely ask for a blood test. They are very very accurate and can detect pregnancy hormone levels below what home pregnancy tests look for.

  19. Miss Behaved

    Ladies, I have 2 technology-related questions.

    First, my very generous brother gave me a flatscreen tv and I’ve just ordered Roku. Does that mean I can cancel cable?

    Also, Verizon has screwed me over for the last time. My phone is barely functioning. They claim I’ve voided the warranty because the sticker on the battery is pink instead of white. Apparently, this means that it got wet, although it didn’t. The cheapest smartphone I can get is over $350. But I could cancel my service, incur the activation fee and get a free or minimally-priced smartphone from another provider, all for a lot less than $350. Does anyone recommend a particular provider? If it helps, I’m in the Boston area.

    • Chicago K

      I have the Roku and I don’t personally think it replaces cable. It has some channels but they don’t have programming that you’ve ever heard of and others charge for watching movies or shows. I use it most to connect the accounts I pay for (Amazon Prime, Netflix, Pandora). You can also watch Youtube with it if you load a channel called Plex onto the Roku. Youtube has a lot of shows and movies for free.

      I would stick with the cable until you are sure you can see what you want via the Roku. I like it, but it doesn’t give me everything I want on its own.

      For verizon…I am with them too and they have awful customer service. I would tend to lean towards your idea to cancel verizon and get a new phone somewhere else.

      • Hel-lo

        My mom has Roku. I wouldn’t cancel your subscription to cable until you’ve had a few months of Roku. You don’t know how much you will watch it or cable.

    • Bonnie

      You can just buy a used verizon phone on ebay and use it until your contract is up.

    • roses

      I have no need for cable with my Roku that streams Netflix, HBO Go and the regular cable shows I like via Plex. Plex is a little complicated to figure out, but I can stream the regular cable shows I love through it – Daily Show, Colbert, PBS, etc.

      • Mpls

        Just know that if you want to HBO Go, you need a code that you only get if you also have a cable subscription to HBO. So, if you don’t know someone who will let you ride along on their subscription and you want to keep HBO, then you need cable.

    • Flying Squirrel

      Have you looked on eBay for a refurbished phone. I’ve generally had good luck getting phones much cheaper that way when I wasn’t eligible for a new one.

    • Ms. Basil E. Frankweiler

      I’ve had my Roku since May and love it. If you’re going to get rid of cable, I would also suggest getting an antennae (sp?). I got one for about $25 from Target and after a little adjustment get about 40 channels including all of the major basic networks (CW, ABC, Fox, etc.).

    • Brant

      I’m in the Boston area. I have AT&T. The coverage with AT&T isn’t nearly as bad as everyone around here says it is. I’m never leaving AT&T simply because I have corporate account level customer service (I bought my number from an old employer when I left). That means I get a real. live. person. when I call. It is worth some shoddy reception now and again.

  20. Leaving the Corporate World

    I’m in the midst of a career crisis. I’m 34, struggling to move up and take my career to the next level but also thinking I need a less demanding career so I can start a family soon.

    Am I the only one who fantasizes about moving to some remote island and just living on a meager income with loads of time to do things like sit on the beach and enjoy family and friends?

    I’m reading Lean In at the moment…given the statistic she quotes that 1/3 of the women who graduate stay in the workforce I suppose I’m not. Sigh. I’m nowhere close to being at her level though and sometimes all of this just doesn’t seem worth it to me.

    Just ranting…no real feedback needed. :)

    • Batgirl

      Oh man, this is so me right now. Feeling very uncertain about what I want to do long term–or even short term. And at 34, I am hoping children will be part of my five year plan, which makes it feel all the more necessary to figure it all out!

    • Monday

      Nope, not alone. I had some of the same thoughts while reading Lean In too–for many of us, it feels like you never actually leave the dues-paying stage and it’s not always clear what we’re working so hard for. I do think that keeping this kind of perspective is useful, although it hurts sometimes. To keep asking “what’s in this for me? what are my real options?” rather than just always obsessing about the next rung on someone else’s ladder.

    • January

      Haha, no, I have a 25-year-old friend who does not want children who wants exactly that lifestyle. I think the corporate world may need to work on its sales pitch a little.

    • emeralds

      If I could move to a remote beachy location, magically transport all of my friends and family along with me, and live on $30 a week, I would do it happily. I enjoy the field I work in, and love my current grad internship, but I would still rather be barefoot on a Central American beach, sipping something out of a coconut. I’ve never been particularly ambitious, though–work/life balance would probably be my #1 consideration in evaluating potential jobs–and do not aspire to a fancy lifestyle.

    • Hel-lo

      Unfortunately, for many of us, work is what we do to pay for those Caribbean vacations. :)

  21. Anon29

    With all due respect, can most of you ladies afford this dress? I don’t think I can. I’m just a bit surprised at some of the splurge items. $2000 for a dress is a lot of money to spend. I’m not a lawyer but do you lawyers make the much money that you can afford to spend two grand on work clothes? Together my SO and I make close to 400k/year and I still don’t think I will be able to drop that much money on clothes. Anyone care to enlightened me? Tell me how the other half lives?

    • January

      This has come up several times on the Monday post, but I think the general consensus is that the splurge items are not necessarily realistic suggestions as much as inspiration (note that Kat linked to a similar, lower-priced dress) or even just an item that Kat thinks is unique or interesting.

      • Equity's Darling

        Agreed, I generally view Monday posts as inspirational.

        Also, there are some people that may be looking for a splurge item- my splurge limit is way, way below $2000, but for someone who just, I don’t know, got a huge bonus, and they want to give themselves a present, maybe they decide to drop $2k on a dress instead of on a purse or jewellery? It’s plausible, even though I’d definitely make different spending choices than a $2k dress.

      • AIMS

        This, plus the fact that everyone has very different priorities and needs and is at different stages in their lives.

    • PSP

      FWIW, this site covers has quite a wide range in terms of careers/salaries… so maybe there is someone who can afford a 2000-dollar dress, who knows?

      But I think that what these splurge posts do (at least for me) is give people ideas they can then incorporate into their own wardrobes based on budget. And honestly, sometimes, it’s just nice to look at pretty clothes.

    • Susie

      Can I – yes. Would I – no. I don’t think any amount of wealth would make me comfortable spending this much on a dress when I could find an equally lovely one for much much less.

    • Two Cents

      Out of pure curiousity, has anyone ever purchased a $2000 dress? Or any item close to that amount? I think my most expensive piece of clothing in my closet would be a dress I bought for $300. And I’m in BigLaw with no loans.

      • TBK

        Not even my wedding gown cost that much. I think I’d only spend that much for a once in a lifetime event (yes, hopefully my wedding was that, but I found a gown I loved for almost half that price), like going to a State Dinner at the White House.

      • CapHillAnon

        Yes. My wedding dress was $2000. I loved it and loved wearing it, but even then (and still now) feel queasy that I spent $2k on it.

        I probably could afford it, but I can’t imagine a scenario in which I’d ever spend that much money again on one article of clothing, unless it were a space suit, had a jet pack, etc.

      • J

        My wedding dress was $3500. The most I’ve ever spent on a “regular” dress, however, is about $350. I can’t justify spending more than that on principal, amount of discretionary income aside.

    • Lynnet

      I would never spend this much on a dress (or any other clothing piece or accessory), even if I won the lottery and never had to worry about money again. but sometimes I like looking at pretty things even if I would never buy them. It’s the same reason I go into Hermes stores and go to the gemstone exhibit at the museum of natural history.

    • Maddie Ross

      I think it’s funny that among all of the professional women on this site, there is this idea that lawyers are the ones who might make enough money to afford this. I wish there was a way to disabuse the general public of this notion. Yes, there are some lawyers who do quite well for themselves, but there are many more who are pulling down somewhere in the 50-90K range (a good living yes, but by no means enough for a $2K dress). It’s this skewed perception that drives students to law school I think. When in reality, there are probably just as many, if not signficantly more, high earners on this site that are in the business world or medicine, etc.

      • Katie

        You’re right, Maddie. Why do people think that lawyers make so much money when in fact, there are plenty who don’t?

  22. Anonymous

    J.Crew Sizing Question- does the origami dress run small on top? It sort of looks like it does on the model.

    I’m generously chested, and most things at j.crew run big in the hips/waist for me and small in the chest, so when I buy their pants or skirts it’s pretty easy just to size down, but for their dresses, I need to gauge whether to order my regular size or bigger.

    • Wildkitten

      I didn’t find the top small. If you do need to size up, my tailor found it very easy to take in the sides and very difficult to take in the origami. But, you probably won’t.

    • anne-on

      For me it is small in the chest (really the ribcage more than the boob area) and fairly straight through the hips. If you have a small ribcage/larger chest you should be ok as the pleating did give a fair amount of room in the front.

  23. Hot Mess

    So this weekend I splurged on a haircut from a more experienced stylist than usual, and I’m never doing it again! I’m sure there are some really good senior stylists out there, but I’ve come to realize that the more experienced ones have ego issues, and are so set in their ways that they give me the haircut they think I should have rather than the one I asked for. I only wanted a simple, short cut with minimal layers, I did NOT need her to do all that fancy trimming. And because I’m in my mid 20’s I’m always worried I’ll come across as spoiled and entitled if I say it’s not what I wanted, or ask what she’s doing (look up “stereotype threat”). At this point just telling a stylist what I want causes so much anxiety I almost burst into tears, because so many of them can’t take simple directions.

    Going forward I’ll need to a) book a consultation and b) emphasize that I want something simple. Also, is it too “princess-y” to request that they tell me before doing any fancy? I hate coming across as high maintenance, especially for a cut that’s meant to be *low* maintenance . . .

    Or is it better at my age to sit down, shut up, and let the experts do what they do best?

    • RED

      I agree that hair stylists who don’t listen to client instructions are frustrating. You are their client, and that’s your hair (and your money). Your age is irrelevant. You should by all means give them clear instructions on what you want, and they should listen and give any feedback they have before the cut. I would take my business elsewhere if I gave instructions and it is evident that the hairstylist didn’t bother to follow.

    • Veronique

      It’s definitely not high maintenance to ask a stylist to cut your hair the way you want it. However, it sounds like you might not be communicating what you want well. “Not fancy” is extremely vague. One person’s basic haircut is another person’s fancy layers. Definitely book a consultation next time and bring pictures of the type of haircut that you’re looking for. This will a lot more helpful for the stylist and should improve your outcome.

      • Veronique

        Also, a good stylist will use a consultation to advise you on how your hair texture, density, etc might affect the style that you want.

      • Hot Mess

        I don’t actually say “not fancy,” I jut say I want something simple with minimal layers, just enough to take the weight off. But stylists usually incorporate some fancy tricks here and there once they’re done layering to give the hair something extra, like one stylist decded to give me some “nice whispies” which actually made my hair a lot harder to style. Some blending is fine, but I really wish they’d ask before “going the extra mile” with my hair.

        I’ve tried everything. Explaining what I like to do to my hair doesn’t work. Bringing in pictures results being talked down to (“no honey that’s a styyyyle, we’re not doing that, you’ll need to styyyle it to look like that.” “I know but I want a cut that makes this easy to-” “nooo there’s no such thing, that’s just a style”), telling the stylist I’m inspired by classic, 1950’s looks usually just confuses the poor girl.

        I’ve had one good stylist in the past year, and she was a junior stylist. The people who don’t listen and go rogue on me have been the experienced ones.

        • emeralds

          I actually think using 1950s hair as your inspiration might be the problem: those are typically very high-maintenance styles, that require a lot of work (rollers, irons, etc.) A quick Google image search returned several hundred high-maintenance looks, and only one or two that looked reasonably wash-and-wear.

          With that said, you should find a stylist that cuts your hair the way you want it cut. If you’re seriously displeased with a cut, they should re-do it for you gratis, or you should find another stylist. I actually had to do this recently with the higher-end (for my city, anyway) stylist who’s been doing my hair for years upon years; I felt horrible calling to schedule it, and was so worried I was going to come across as a high-maintenance mid-20s diva, but every time I looked in a mirror I felt miserable. Going in the second time, we cleared up the miscommunication and I have exactly what I want. Any stylist interested in keeping clients should be willing to do the same.

          • Hot Mess

            Hence why I stopped mentioning it months ago and opted for simpler cuts I could curl easily. I’m not trying to replicate those looks, because you’re right, a lot of them are insane, and people don’t actually know how hair was cut back then because no one asks for those styles anymore. The most “vintage” cut I’d get might be a middy but I’m not confident I can find a stylist who knows what that is.

            I’d get my hair re-done, but it’s so short now the only way to fix it might be to get a pixie cut.

          • Wannabe Runner

            When I was in high school, I traveled to my boyfriend’s town to go to his prom. He didn’t tell me that all 17 other high schools in his area had prom the same day. I couldn’t find *anywhere* to do my hair, including the JC Penney salon.

            I eventually went to a salon called something like Melva’s, about 50 miles out of town. They were literally the only place available. (I took a picture of Susan Sarandon from the previous year’s Oscars and asked if they could do it like that. Melva said yes. The answer was actually no way.)

            Find a place like that – an old lady salon. They absolutely know how to do styles from the 1950s.

            But also think about whether your current stylist might be a little more cognizant of what might work with your hair type than you are. 20 years after prom, I still don’t know squat about how to style my hair. But I trust my stylist. I never really like what he does with my hair, but I get tons of compliments on it every time. He knows what to do. I do not.

          • Wannabe Runner

            Oh, and my mom goes to the barber at the hospital. He cuts hair for like $10. Done.

        • Eagon

          Another option to consider is bringing additional photos of what you DON’T like/want and pointing out what you dislike about each one in particular. “too short” “bangs too heavy” “not this dark” ” too/not enough/etc whatever” can be just as helpful as saying what you do want when defining your hair boundaries with a stylist.

    • k-padi

      I used to go to a pretty high-end hair stylist back when I had a bob–which, to my surprise, is actually a very challenging cut. It’s really about developing a relationship over time. I would never go to a stylist for the first time and ask for a drastic change. Instead, on the first visit, I would go in and ask for “something like what I already have”, point out 2 or 3 minor things that bug me about my current cut, and explain that I’m really bad at hair and need a cut that’s basically wash and go. Over the next two or three visits, I use the consultation to discuss what I liked and didn’t like about the cut. Then, once you have a good relationship, you can ask for something completely different and expect the stylist to know better what you want.

      Honestly, the good stylists (high-end or not) are booked in advance and don’t take too many new clients (they don’t need to). The ones who take people who are going for a “splurge” aren’t that good in my experience.

      • KLG

        I definitely stress the need for a wash and go haircut to any stylist I see and I try to bring pictures with me and then I ask “is this style wash and go? What would I have to do for my hair to look like this?” I stuck with the stylist who understood that I really wasn’t going to spend any time on my hair and gave me tricks to “freshen up” my haircut in 15 minutes for nice events so that I didn’t have to blow dry and straighten it (which takes more like an hour). I still go see her even though she’s two hours away because she really listens.

  24. Merabella

    My boss has been in such a foul mood recently, I just am not sure what to do. It is like walking on eggshells, you never know what is going to set him off. Any suggestions on dealing with this? It is unusual – so it isn’t like I have a generally uncomfortable office environment, maybe the last few weeks/months.

    • mascot

      Is your relationship such that you can ask him? It doesn’t have to be a big scene, just a quiet, “you seem stressed/off/edgy, is everything ok?” Or is there someone else close to him that you can ask?

    • k-padi

      I’ll confess: I work with a baby lawyer who sets me off nearly every time I speak with him. Usually, it’s just poor timing. I’m running off to a meeting and he wants to have an in-depth discussion.

      But even still, this person sets me off more than most because he insists on asking questions that he should already know the answer to or know where to find the answer. He asks questions that are merely him second guessing himself or the person he’s supposed to be working on the matter with. He frames client requirements as my personal preferences then challenges me on them.

      Don’t ask your boss if everything is OK. This guy tried that with me and I just couldn’t find a way to tell him the truth in a tactful manner in the 10 seconds I had before a meeting.

      • Merabella

        It isn’t just with me, it is with everyone. Otherwise I’d be worried I was the one setting him off. I don’t know that I’d approach him. Really just trying to figure out how to avoid it.

        • Skm

          Uh maybe you should address it and not avoid it. I working in management for 3 years before coming to law school and my main learning has been lawyers are (usually) not willing to take the time to correct a behavior instead of snarking about it or trying to ignore it forever. I find it very odd.

  25. Anonymous

    How do you know when it’s time to move on from a job that has been ‘good’?

    I have been in my current job for about 4 1/2 years. The work is fine, but there is no more room for growth (in title or in more interesting work). It pays decently, good benefits, and is a good atmosphere (colleagues + space + expectations). I definitely do not feel challenged anymore, but I’m also not quite sure what the next step would be (new org/branch out across the field/new city?), and am a little afraid of trading something good for something new, and having new wind up being worse.

    • hellskitchen

      It depends on what role work plays in your life. If it’s a good way to pay bills but you don’t derive much meaning from it, then by all means stay put… you could seize the opportunity if something better comes along instead of proactively looking for a new job. On the other hand, if your job/work is very meaningful to you, then I’d say start looking for something. In my personal experience, a “good” job quickly becomes stagnant and when I have been in your shoes I have opted to move on. Because your current situation is tolerable you can take your time looking for something, rather than taking the first decent thing that comes along because you are desperate to leave. Start doing informational interviews, sign up for emails from job boards, talk to friends in different fields… you can do a lot to put yourself out there and explore opportunities even if you are not actively applying or interviewing. Good luck!

    • Wannabe Runner

      It sounds like a legitimate time to start looking… but you don’t have to move immediately. Keeping an eye out is ok.

  26. zora

    Paging EC MD:

    Heard the smoke from the Rim Fire is starting to affect your area, hoping you and the family are okay. {{Internet Hugs!!}}

  27. Need to Improve

    This looks a lot like the Suzi Chin dress Kat linked, which I have and really, really love. If you like the expensive dress, you should get the $60 version instead! It’s worth it.

  28. Ashley

    Sorry, but oh hell no.
    That dress looks horrible. I am looking at how lumpy and bumpy the model looks. If is can turn a 6′ stick figure into this, what hope does a normal sized woman have?

    • Blonde Lawyer

      Are we looking at the same dress? I see no lumps and bumps and think it would look amazing!

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