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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
Anthropologie is absolutely crushing it with the plus-sized selection this season. I’ve been keeping an eye on their slowly expanding selection, and there’s finally a lot of great stuff available. This short-sleeved top would be beautiful for this summer-to-fall transition. Wear it with white trousers and sandals now and swap it out for gray pants and loafers in October.
A couple of other plus-sized favorites are these cropped, wide-leg pants and the ubiquitous Somerset dress. (I have three in my closet).
The top is $98 and comes in plus sizes 1X–3X, standard sizes XXS–XL, and petite sizes XXS–XL.
Admin update: whoops, sorry about the wrong picture on the homepage! If you liked the stripey short-sleeve sweater here's the link… and here's our last roundup of short-sleeved sweater tees if you're looking for something more basic.
Some of our favorite short-sleeved sweater tees for 2024 include Quince ($45!), Ann Taylor, J.Crew,* Boden, and this Amazon bestseller. (* plus sizes too!) If you're hunting for something fancier, check out Kule; Tuckernuck also has one in a cashmere/silk. As of 2024, Nordstrom and Anthropologie both have a huge selection of sweater tees. (All of the ones below come in white and black, as well as other colors!)
Sales of note for 10.10.24
- Nordstrom – Extra 25% off clearance (through 10/14); there's a lot from reader favorites like Boss, FARM Rio, Marc Fisher LTD, AGL, and more. Plus: free 2-day shipping, and cardmembers earn 6x points per dollar (3X the points on beauty).
- Ann Taylor – Extra 50% off sale (ends 10/12)
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything plus extra 25% off your $125+ purchase
- Boden – 10% off new styles with code; free shipping over $75
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off a lot of sale items, with code
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide
- J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site, plus extra 25% off orders $150+
- Lo & Sons – Fall Sale, up to 35% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – Sale on sale, up to 85% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 50% off 2+ markdowns
- Target – Circle week, deals on 1000s of items
- White House Black Market – Buy one, get one – 50% off full price styles
Rome shopping
Marking a milestone with a trip to Italy and interested in picking up a jewelry souvenir, specifically earrings since that’s what I enjoy most – where would you go with a budget of roughly $1000? (Example of taste, the VCA Alhambra stud earrings are on my long term wish list!)
Anon
I like old coins. Or costume jewelry, where I don’t worry about quality, just whether it sparks joy.
anonshmanon
Venice is known for their artisan glass works.
Rome shopping
Thanks, this trip we’re staying around Rome, but we did love Venice several years ago!
A
I would buy Italian gold jewellery.
Rome shopping
Do you have any specific shops to recommend in Rome?
A
You could get a pendant or ring with $1000
Anon
But she wants earrings.
Anonymous
Um, what?
Anon
I live the pieces at Fabula Etrusca in Volterra. If you want a different earring back, a modification of a design, they will accommodate. I wear the pieces I have all the time. There is a website if you want to get a feel for the work.
Sybil
Hallelujah for someone who answers the question that was asked.
Sybil
Ha, guess I should have seen how far Volterra was from Rome first. But good luck OP!
Anonymous
Seriously lol. I’m not OP but even I was getting frustrated by this thread. “Earring recommendations?” “How about coins or rings instead?”
Rome shopping
Thank you for the specific rec, although it’s too far from Rome for this trip! I should have been more clear in my post rather than just my handle, obviously :)
emeralds
This is all based on when I was a broke AF college student so it’s very possible things may have changed, but here’s what I would do…I would take some leisurely strolls through the Centro Storico, Spanish Steps (the surrounding streets moreso than the main drag), Via del Corso (ditto on getting off the main drag, I think I remember a lot of nice higher-end boutique shops in the vicinity of the Piazza di Firenze?) and Trastevere, and poke your nose into any little boutique that looks appealing. I remember walking down the streets around the Piazza dei Coronari (possibly Via dei Coronari? like if you’re going from the Piazza dei Coronari toward the Piazza Navona?) and drooling at all the windows.
Basically, there should be plenty of small artisanal places that will be impossible to google.
Rome shopping
Thanks!
little baker mouse
Some beautiful jewelers to visit – though the pricing might be a little higher than your budget – Diego Percossi Papi (close to the Pantheon and the famous Sant’Eustachio coffee shop), Massimo Maria Melis, Eleuteri (vintage and antique jewels, they have a branch in NY but the Rome HQ is located on Via Condotti where all the other luxury boutiques are concentrated, watch out for pickpockets on the Spanish Steps), Delfina Delettrez (surreal and playful jewels, near Campo de’ Fiori), Fabio Salini is near Delfina Delettrez. That’s one thing that you’ll notice, often the shops appear in clusters, and there will other things worth browsing nearby. The original Bulgari boutique in Rome is worth visiting just for the interior design. It’s very beautiful and very glamorous.
Come back and share your shopping experiences! I hope you find something beautiful to mark your milestone.
Rome shopping
Thanks so much!
NY CPA
I got some vintage Chanel earrings at a small vintage store in Venice for a great price. I can’t recommend a particular store in Rome, but if liking VCA earrings means you’re into luxury brands, I would suggest looking for little vintage stores while walking around back streets in Rome. You might find something great!
Anon
Does anyone have the Somerset maxi from Anthro in black? I’m 5-4 so I am thinking that the petite would work better for me (with flats). It is cotton, which is fine. Would it rumple too much for a funeral you’d need to drive to? Or is the black hood at hiding wrinkles?
Anonymous
I have the dress in two colors but not in black. I’m 5’2” and 36D. The medium regular is an ok length as long as I wear a bit of a heel. It is tight around the bust, though; I can’t clasp the hook and eye enclosure I’m the front for modesty. I still wear it, but it’s pretty busty. The large regular is too long without hemming but the bust is fine, the large petite is an ok length but it has the same bust problem as the medium regular.
Sorry for your loss.
anon
If you haven’t tried this dress on before, I’d have a backup. If you have a large chest on a small frame, it doesn’t work. It’s very low cut on that slit on the neckline.
Anon
OP — thanks all for this. I am very flat-chested, so it may work for me.
Anonymous
I am modestly endowed and that dress looks terrible on me. I wouldn’t count on its working for you without trying it on.
Anonymous
I’m a B cup and I love this dress. It is a low slit, but fine for me with a low bra and the clasp closed.
Anon
+1, thats me and I loathe that dress. I’ve tried and returned it multiple times
Anonymous
I’m built similarly to you and have been eyeing the Somerset. Thanks for letting me know it’s a pass.
Anon
The Somerset dress is my favorite! I don’t have it in black. I think a black one would be fine for a funeral. The material is the type that isn’t supposed to look super pressed, so I think it handles wrinkles well. I take mine on trips a lot for this reason and always get a ton of compliments.
Anon
I’m also 5’4”. The petite hits me a little above the ankle and is very flattering. The regular hit close to the floor– I would have needed a heel and I don’t really wear heels.
I am flat-chested also. I found that even with the clasp in the front some of my bra shows. I use some dress tape to make the slit higher, and it works well.
Anonymous
I have the short version but in 1X (maybe 1X petite if that was available). IMHO it’s a bit too jaunty/flirty/flippy for a funeral – feels more like a party dress than a standard black dress. maybe the maxi version is different but those crisp flutter sleeves are the same. wish i’d gotten it in silk or velvet instead.
Anon
Don’t think the wrinkling would be an issue but the shape is a bit casual or garden party for a funeral
Anon
Do any of you have the MZ Wallace travel Crosby or travel Nik bags? Do they stand up in their own? Looking for a lightweight laptop bag that will fit over my wheelie bag handle.
Anonymous
if the bag has one of those sleeves for your rollerbag it won’t matter if they stand up on their own. have liked MZ in the past but not sure about those MZ bags.
In-House in Houston
Hi Ladies, I’m traveling to London in October. First time in Europe since a few years before covid. What’s the best way to get cash/currency? Get it here at my bank or when we get there? Do I even need cash? I have a credit card w/no international fees. Should I just use that? Any suggestions/tips are greatly appreciated. Thanks!
Anon
I think it’s good to have some spending cash in local currency for bottles of water, quick snacks and buying things from street vendors.
Anonymous
All of those places take cards
Anon
Yes – I think the US is one of the few developed countries that still has a reliance on cash in a lot of places but you truly don’t need it in London.
Anon
Not only do you not need it, no one takes it. We were there a few months ago and as soon as we spoke with an American accent someone said “no cash, you can eat but we don’t take cash.”
Anon
I haven’t taken out any cash on my last 4 or 5 trips to Europe. Everything takes cards these days.
Anne-on
If you have triple A the local offices can order foreign currency for you at pretty decent rates, otherwise use your bank. I wouldn’t take out a ton, maybe $200 pounds at most? I generally like to keep enough for a black taxi ride from the airport (chips/card readers have failed on me many times) and to have for small needs/vendors. I was in London over the summer and 95% of places took cards, we really would have been fine with almost no cash.
Senior Attorney
You never need to get cash before leaving the U.S. The exchange rate isn’t going to be very good and it’s a hassle for no reason.
As others have said, you really don’t need much cash in London and you can get some out of an ATM when you get there.
Anonymous
You don’t need cash. I didn’t use it once in London this year. If you find you’re wanting some just go to an ATM but you don’t need it.
Cat
Last two trips I don’t think we ever got cash at all. But unless your bank charges some astronomical fee, we’ve found it easiest to just withdraw from an ATM there if needed for small purchases.
anon
I was in London last October and I did get out a small amount of cash, most of which I didn’t use. I got it from an ATM at the airport. In my experience, it is definitely not necessary to get foreign currency in advance from your bank if you’re going to anywhere in Europe – I’ve never had trouble using an ATM in Europe or Latin America with a US debit card (Asia is another story…).
Cb
Yeah, I live in the UK and have used cash maybe 6 times in the last year? I went to lunch the other day and their card machine was broken, and I had to go get money, but that’s a rarity.
Taki
London is almost entirely cashless. Most restaurants don’t accept cash at all, and the tube accepts your “tap” credit card to enter so you don’t even need an Oyster card. However, I would have euros for the rest of Europe. Most touristy cities you will be fine with credit card only, but I found a lot of places either prefer cash or outright refuse cards. Also, AmEx is only accepted about half the time, so I hope your card is a Visa.
With all that said, I live in Sicily which is a few decades behind the north of Italy so I use cash anywhere that isn’t a chain store or a place obviously catering to tourists.
Anon
In the last two years I’ve been to Italy x2, Spain x2, Portugal and Iceland and never withdrew any cash. However, we were mostly in touristy areas.
Anonymous
This. Italy and Austria each of the last 3 years. Can’t remember using cash except a few times when kids wanted to pay for ice cream or something with cash because they find euros fun.
Anokha
I went to London back in June for work — and I was able to use card for everything, including smaller purchases. I wouldn’t take cash that you purchased from your bank here. Worst case scenario, there are plenty of ATMs there.
Anon
Absolutely no cash is accepted anywhere in London. Don’t even bother getting any.
Ses
+1 from a Londoner
Anon
We go out of the country about 2-3 at a time every year and mostly to Europe. We always bring about $1k split between the two of us in cash and have encountered at least one place in England, Scotland, Spain, and France that was cash only. These places were not in large cities though. Also gives us piece of mind if something were to happen to our cards (we bring a back up card and leave a good portion of cash in the room safe while we’re out).
Depending where you’re located, you can get euros or pounds from your bank the same day or wait about a week for other currency. You can order online and pick up in person at the branch closest to you.
Anonymous
The only thing you need cash for in London would be where you give mobey away, like:
– a salon tip, if you are getting hair or nails done, or a massage or something
– tip for housekeeping at your hotel
– donations to the homeless, if that’s relevant for you
The big churches and museums take cashless donations
Runcible Spoon
If you plan to leave any tips (for the bellhop and chambermaid if you stay at a hotel), you might consider getting some cash out of an ATM upon arrival. No more than the equivalent of US $50-100, as “just-in-case” cash. Upon departure, you can put any leftover cash (including coins) that you won’t need on the way to or at the airport on your hotel bill, and pay the remainder of the invoice on your credit card. That way you don’t bring home unneeded foreign currency, especially if you don’t plan to return for some time.
Winter
Great tip re: paying the hotel with remaining cash!
Meg
One addition – Germany is real grumpy about cash, especially at restaurants. I actually had one show me my total on an iPhone, but then wouldn’t take card for payment. You’re fine with a card at grocery stores and chain coffee places, tho.
Ginger
+1 The bigger cities are more accepting of credit cards. My card was refused a few times in smaller cities, especially at restaurants.
Anon
Totally agree! I was shocked about how much cash I had to get out in Germany.
Anon
I live in Germany. Imagine America in the early 2000s, that is the state of technology here. People still use fax for official business.
Anon
If you do salon keratin treatments (any brand, Brazilian or otherwise): how often do you do it, what kind of hair do you have naturally, and how do you decide when it’s time to go back in? Thanks.
Anon
I use it where I have textured grays — my brown hair is straight and fine and I’m OK with the gray hair if I can get it to have the texture of the rest of my hair. So I do it on the crown only, quarterly. It seems to work well for that. Maybe 10% of my hair? Never done the whole head.
Anon
I have done it a couple times over 5 years, and its been amazing. Lasts > 6months.
But I hesitate to do it too much due to the fumes (which were a lot last time despite a mask).
Anonymous
I have naturally wavy hair. I did a Brazilian once. It lasted about 4-6 months–it was sort of gradual as it fades out. It made my hair a ton smoother and softer. When I straightened it, it looked like glass. When I wore it wavy, it didn’t have any frizz. It was heaven. I would have done it again except the smell was so horrendous (even after I finally washed it and blow-dried it, I could smell it again for a week or so after whenever I would sweat–it’s like it seeped into my pores). I started to read about how bad the chemicals are for you and figured having “newscaster” hair just wasn’t worth it. That was more than 10 years ago. Not sure if the techniques have changed.
Runcible Spoon
I get a Brazilian Blowout about every six months (although last year my hairdresser and I forgot, and we let it go for about 10-12 months). Done this for years. My hair is naturally extremely tightly frizzy and bushy. I decide to go back when blowing dry my hair becomes a bit of a chore due to the root growth.
Emma
Boring tech question – does anyone have a printer that works well with a macbook? My cheap HP deskjet just won’t connect to my computer or iphone, I’ve spent hours with tech support without success and I need to print! Just regular documents occasionally, nothing huge or bulky.
Cb
I think the Brother laserjet that Wirecutter recommends is the best bet. We have PCs but it works well with iphones.
Anne-on
+1 to brother. We bought one pre-pandemic and that thing has been a workhorse through homeschooling/work from home/personal printing needs.
Anon8
I will sign the praises of the brother laser printers for ever and ever. It just WORKS– a seemingly impossible ask of any other printer. I use it with my Macbook, iphone, husband’s PC and his Android phone without issue. As long as you’re on the same wifi network as the printer it just goes. Also, I don’t print a ton, and ink printers would always dry out and I’d have to replace the ink cartridge. Laser printers use toner, which doesn’t dry out, and seems to last me forever (years).
Anonymous
+1. We have an old laser Brother (at least 6 years old). It works great with my husband’s PC, my Mac, and I can print from my iPhone.
anon
Another +1 to brother. We have the printer/scanner wireless combo and it works like a dream with our phones and computer – super helpful for printing forms directly from my phone or scanning signed forms to my email. And I am not particularly tech savvy.
NYCer
I like the Brother laserjet we have at home too. I use it from both my PC work computer and Mac.
Sybil
I got a very cheap Canon Pixma MG 3620 as an emergency vacation purchase a couple years and use it exclusively (though rarely) with macbooks and iOS devices. It works perfectly well.
anon
I had this problem too, but it turned out to be my switch to AT&T fiber for internet. At least that’s what I *think* is the culprit. I gave up and just go to the library for my occasional printing needs.
Runcible Spoon
I bought a Brother MFC-L2710DW series printer about three years ago, and it just notified me that out toner is running low. Works great with a Mac, so whatever the current model of that printer is should work. Bonus: it was quite inexpensive.
KS IT Chick
We have an Oki MB451w. We have only Apple products in the house for personal use. It works pretty well, definitely better than the inkjet we used to use.
Anon
I’ve been using an HP all-in-one with Macbooks for more than eight years. I *never* use the HP utility to connect and manage the printer. I just use the Printer section from the System Preferences window. I also use different printers at a dozen clients’ offices, and I just use the same process to connect to their printers. Brother, HP, Xerox…
Anonymous
+1 I have an old HP laserjet that I use with my MacBook, and using the HP utility and printer driver instructions has steered me wrong in terrible ways.
Anon
I was initially having trouble connecting a new-to-me Macbook to my old HP printer. I called customer service. She said using the HP utility was REQUIRED for the printer to work. I said “no, it isn’t. I’ve never used it and the printer always worked just fine.” She didn’t believe me.
anythingBUT
HP Printers are absolute garbage
Source: I work in IT and detest HP Printers
anon
Anybody else watch the Republican debate last night? It was fascinating. My observations:
– Vivek Ramaswamy was nails-on-the-chalkboard irritating to me but I fear that he will get a huge boost out of this because he went so full-bore Trumpy.
– Chris Christie surprisingly enjoyable although I tend to find him off-putting.
– Nikki Haley by far the most presidential and came off as the smartest but far too moderate (in tone and in substance) to win a Republican primary.
-Mike Pence was like a 1990s Christian Coalition guy…lots of invoking of Jesus. Seemed very old and out of touch both in style and in substance).
– Ron DeSantis was just less present than I thought he would be.
-Was interested to see Tim Scott but he didn’t get to talk a lot – he seemed unwilling to interrupt others which was necessary in a crowd of eight people trying to establish themselves.
-Doug Burgum made no impression other than being genial and from North Dakota. Oh, and he was very federalist – which I appreciate but which Republican primary voters no longer seem to care about.
-Asa Hutchinson was there.
In general, it was interesting that the crowd responded very positively to certain types of denunciations of Trump – like there were positive responses to measured attacks on his conduct on Jan 6 – but was super negative on the fact that charges had been brought against him (lots of booing when that was discussed). They really responded negatively to Chris Christie (who went after Trump the most strongly), but others said similar things in more moderate language and got cheers/applause. Although Pence didn’t make much of an impression on the whole, virtually every candidate said he did the right thing on Jan 6 and got cheered for it.
Nikki Haley both said that climate change was real and took a more moderate stance on abortion (in contrast to others on the stage, who were pushing for national abortion bans) and got a positive response from the crowd for both.
Unfortunately, however, I think the TL;DR is that none of it mattered and Trump will be the nominee. I suspect he will at least want to pick Ramaswamy as his VP – he seemed to be clearly angling for it, bc he made no argument as to why he should be the nominee rather than Trump and spent half the debate fawning over Trump’s awesomeness.
anon
I will also add that there was one notable thing about Asa Hutchinson, which was that instead of an American flag lapel pin (which most of the candidates had) he had an American and Israeli flag lapel pin. Whatever your views on our Israel policy, it seems like super poor judgement to wear the flag of another country on your lapel when running for president of the United States?
Anon
I didn’t watch but a lot of people vote Republican because of their support for Israel. It could have been a very smart move actually.
No Face
Agree, this is a Thing with a big chunk of Republican voters.
Anonymous
Yes. There are Jews so enamored with Israel that they will support Republicans even if the only reason the Republicans want to save Israel is to ensure the opportunity to dam# the Jews to “Hell” so they themselves can go to “Heaven.”
I will never ever understand why this appeals to people in either camp.
Anon
Orthodox Jews, and they’re a tiny fraction of the Jewish population in the US.
American Jews vote for Democrats by a larger margin than any other religious group in the US, so it’s not correct to imply that Jews as a group vote Republican because of Israel.
Anon
There’s also the evangelical contingent of Republicans who support Israel because “Jesus was born there and Jesus was a Jew and it’s the Holy Land and the Bible talks about Israel.” The fact that the modern Israeli state is not the twelve tribes wandering in the desert with tents and camels and manna is lost on some of them. (Like my husband’s extended family…)
Anonymous
Why? Like of all the problems this isn’t one
Cb
I was listening to the Pod Save America response this AM and they had an interesting thing about the audience – mostly donors, advisors, rather than the base? Which could impact the cheers/boos.
Anon
I would 1000% support Haley but my state’s primary is too late for my vote to matter or to have any good choices by then. Glad that SC, where she was governor, votes early and maybe she and Tim Scott will split the vote (nah, Trump will win that, but maybe they will finish strong in second and third).
Anonymous
We have an open primary and at this point would also support Haley. If nothing else, watching the major heartburn of a bunch of R men having to choose between her and Biden for pres would be worth it.
Anon
In spite of myself, I liked Nikki Haley’s performance and I wish she were a more viable candidate on the Republican side. I wouldn’t vote for her against any Democratic candidate (even Biden, whom I truly believe is too old to run again) but if I were voting in the Republican primary I’d vote for her. I wish we had someone on the Dem side who came across like she does, and seemed like as viable a candidate for the future.
anon
She killed it. DH gave her a bunch of money last night. I hope she makes it. (We are both Rs.)
anon
She did such a good job of attacking, which is so so hard to nail as a woman.
Anonymous
Congrats on hating women
Anon
I honestly came out of it liking her as a person and I generally do not tend to like politicians.
Anonymous
There is less than zero chance of her being the nominee or the VP. Woman and POC. Vast majority of R think either of those reasons disqualify her from power. Nominee and VP will be white males who are anti-choice per usual.
Anon
I think Vivek will be Trump’s VP. He’s trying to appeal to the MAGA base more than other candidates.
Anon
IDK — I think a lot of Rs have Trump fatigue. In the past, maybe they voted him b/c he isn’t Hillary but now, I think you’d have to hold your nose hard to vote for him. Some of the base is hard-core, but most of my R friends are like me (in another era, would be conservative Ds, but are socially liberal but fiscally more cautious) and would welcome Haley. In SC, TIM SCOTT is already their senator. Nikki Haley was governor of SC. The world is not as it always was.
Also, Haley went to Clemson. I think we are ready for a president or VP from State U.
Anonymous
Our current president is a state school alum….
Anon
To the 12:53 anon, we have a president who graduated from a state university right now. Joe Biden graduated from the University of Delaware.
I’m not so sure about Gov Haley – my impression of her is someone who through a combination of hard work and good fortune, has been rewarded in life and is pulling the ladder up behind her.
Girlonawireless
@12:53 anon — I’ll add that our current veep went to a State U for law school.
Anon
Same, I would vote for Biden over her, but Haley would be by far the best of the people on stage last night. It’s not going to happen though.
Anon
This is an interesting summary. Thank you. I don’t have the bandwidth for a substantive discussion at the moment but would like to note that I thought that if I had to listen to Ramaswamy for four years I would be tempted to stab myself in the ears. Holy cow – nails on a chalkboard is right.
Anon
My husband and I started yelling “NO” every time the moderator said that he got to respond because he’d been mentioned.
Anonymous
I was driving and listening on the radio. I wanted so much to reach into my stereo and slap Vivek HARD across the face. I cannot stand that man! I knew nothing about him before last night and now I positively despise him. Arrogant little twerp. “Fossil fuels are the future”?! “Drill, frac, mine”?! Get out of here with that nonsense.
I’m a conservative Dem and really liked what Nikki Haley had to say. Especially her statement on abortion (the “can’t we all agree…?” litany) and foreign policy (when she mopped the floor with Vivek). After it was over, I was trying to remember if she said anything I disagreed with – I’m sure she holds positions that I don’t care for, but in another world, maybe she’d be a centrist compromise candidate.
I appreciated when several candidates said they supported the Constitution. That’s always refreshing.
Mike Pence seemed to falter a few times in ways you wouldn’t expect for a seasoned politician. I read an op-ed somewhere that suggested he’s running to burnish his reputation for history, not really to win (he disputes this), and he said just enough last night to really drive that idea home.
Populism doesn’t fit Tim Scott. He was originally elected in the business-friendly Republican mold, and of course that’s no longer fashionable. I am always so surprised to hear him tell his personal story (single mom, poverty) and then finish with how we’re going to cut government programs. It seems so incongruous.
Didn’t know much about Asa Hutchinson or Doug Burgum before this. Doug I kinda liked – seemed at least to have his head on straight, concerned with governing and getting things done. Asa was over there touting all the ways they’ve made people poorer.
And dude, DeSantis. He’s done now, right? He might have answered a question directly once or twice all night? I can’t remember what the topic was, but he launched into this spiel, and the moderator interrupted to say, “You’re not answering the question,” and he said, “I know” (!!) and kept on with the spiel that totally danced around the issue.
It was an interesting listen. I’m glad I happened to be in my car for two hours last night. But sadly, yes, I do think it’ll be Trump in the end.
Anonymous
Well she’s pro life so no we can’t all agree
Anonymous
the fact that she included late term abortion in that statement… no we can’t all agree on that. the people who actually need late term abortions shouldn’t have to jump through hoops to get them or be forced to birth children who will die immediately or kill the mom in the process. if you’re a well-read person of reason you must see that doctors should be the ones to make that decision, not politicians.
Anonymous
+1000000
Anon
Man, half a loaf is better than none. All or nothing politics is what got us to where we are today.
Anon
Haley could have run as a conservative Democrat not that long ago, IMO. And you explained the Tim Scott issue way better than I did. I honestly felt like he really *doesn’t* want to run on his personal story but has been told needs to or something like that.
Anonymous
LOL at the notion that Haley has a chance. No way GOP will have a woman POC as either P or VP anytime in the next century. Large faction of current GOP thinks a woman’s place is in the home.
Anon
GOP has run a woman as VP candidate before and she was incredibly popular with the base.
Anon
(She was also an idiot, but still – she was actually more popular with Republican voters than McCain.)
Anon
Yeah people find women much more palatable in the VP position. The problem is women in power – and Americans know the VP doesn’t have any power.
I actually think Trump might beat Biden if he picked Haley as VP so I hope he doesn’t, even though I like her.
Anonymous
GOP then and now are very different. That was more than 15 years ago.
anon
I don’t agree that any GOP base voters are less likely to elect a woman than they were when Palin ran. In fact (as someone who consumes a lot of conservative political commentary and whose world is primarily made up of Republicans), I think they’re noticeably more likely and those women are more prominent. Republicans – especially MAGA Republicans – LOVE a conservative female politician, especially a pretty one. Conservative women get a big boost because the party likes to point to them as an indication that the GOP isn’t sexist. Thus the political stardom of the Kristi Noems, Lauren Boeberts, and Marjorie Taylor Greens of the world.
Race is probably Haley’s bigger issue, but the fact that she has a non-ethnic-sounding name (well, nickname – her legal first name is Nimrata) and is Christian mutes some of that. In fact, those two facts make her attractive because she’s more palatable to the GOP base and offers the ability to say “look, we’re not racist because we elected this person governor/she’s a presidential candidate/etc.”
Anon
I feel like people are underplaying the significance that Haley won a state-wide governor’s race in SC. SC is . . . a problematic state in many ways, but here they are. Daughter of Indian immigrants as governor. Black man as senator. IDK if it is immigration from the NEUS and retiree migration or just that it’s 2023 and a lot of SC’s upstate growth is from BMW, etc. It’s not the SC of the 1850s. I think that Haley has a vanilla name helps her but she doesn’t hide who she is — a Clemson graduate.
Go Nikki!
I consider myself an independent, but I cannot stand Trump. I registered as a Republican specifically to vote against him in the primary. I’ve given a little money to Nikki Haley, too. We need more moderates and less polarization.
Anon
I don’t want to live in a country whose president makes decisions because he accepted Jesus Chris into his heart as his Lord and Savior – so there goes Pence.
I don’t want to live in a country where people under 25 only get to vote if they jump through hoops and we think climate change is a hoax and we should let Russia invade and kill whoever they want – so there goes Vivek.
I don’t want to live in a country with a federal abortion ban – so there goes Tim Scott.
I don’t want to live in a country where I am asked to agree that we should ban late term abortion – so there goes Haley (though I did appreciate her pointing out that Vivek knows nothing about foreign policy).
I don’t want to live in a country that looks like Florida – so there goes DeSantis.
I appreciated the civilized demeanor of Hutchinson and Borglum, but I deeply disagree with many of their core beliefs and policies. (And Asa, the Jews who will vote for the Republican to “protect” Israel will vote for that person whether you wear the pin or not, and the Evangelicals who want to “protect” Israel only do so because these think it brings Christians closer to the return of Jesus, so you’re not fooling moderate Jews.)
It is a sad state of affairs that Christie stood out as the only truth-teller on the stage.
Anon
Similar question as above, but for Italy. I’m going to be in Italy for about 2 weeks in October. Should I order Euros from AAA?
Rome shopping
We have a debit card with no fees so aren’t bothering to get any in advance. YMMV based on your bank.
Anon
I have a card with no international transaction fees but I always like to have cash as a backup, for tips, and small purchases. About a decade ago I forgot to inform my credit card company and bank about my trip and had to borrow money from my sibling so now I always like a few hundred.
Anon
I’ve been to Italy twice since the pandemic (Florence/Tuscany and Naples/Amalfi Coast) and didn’t ever need Euros. I definitely wouldn’t get them in advance. If you find that you need them while there, you can just get them out of an ATM. Tipping tour guides would be the main thing you’d need them for, I think.
Anonymous
This. Just get a bit of cash – like 200 Euros in smaller bills from an ATM at the airport.
Anon8
FWIW I have never gotten cash in advance of going to Europe. Even when I went to Italy on a school trip in 2007 they told us to bring an ATM card and I easily got cash that way. I think ATMs are also generally considered the best exchange rate.
ELS
Same as the commenter above, my practice is always to get cash when I land in the country I’m going to if I need it since my bank refunds all ATM fees.
FWIW, I keep a checking account with Schwab that is my travel account, where I can pull cash without worrying about ATM fees when I’m out of the country. It’s also an account that is not linked to my primary accounts, which makes me feel less nervous about traveling with my debit card.
buffybot
I will say, having just been in Italy, it was a more cash dependent country than I had come across in awhile. While maybe you don’t need cash in London, we definitely needed cash in some amount most days in Italy (and we weren’t even anywhere remote).
Anon
Counterpoint, I’ve been to Italy a few times recently (major tourist areas though) and didn’t need any cash.
Anon
Yea I’m not sticking with super touristy areas. Some are smaller towns where you can’t even rely on Uber so I want to be prepared
Nora
I’ve just taken out cash from an ATM in the country anywhere I’ve traveled recently.
Anon
Same. These questions are kind of surprising to me. It seems so antiquated to go to a bank to get cash in a foreign currency before you travel. Like, our financial system is different than it was in the 1980s when you used to have to do things like that.
NY CPA
+1 I’ve done this across Europe (including Italy) and it’s generally cheaper this way
Senior Attorney
Agree.
Anon
I’ve never gotten cash in a foreign currency when traveling abroad. I bring some US cash and get some foreign cash from an ATM at the airport. If the ATM at the airport doesn’t work (has happened to me in South America, Africa, and Asia; never an issue in Europe), I will go to the money exchange place at the airport to exchange enough cash for a day or two.
The idea of getting foreign currency before the trip just seems like it’s adding an errand to your travel prep
Anon
OP here, I’m aware of today’s technology. I’m aware of ATMs and credits cards. I generally only use my ATM card at my banks ATM to avoid fees. I simply asked the best way to get Euros for a trip. If others don’t do that before a trip, good for them! Once again this board decides to not give an answer to a reasonable question.
Anon
People answered the question you asked….
NY CPA
It’s usually a better exchange rate to go through your bank and pay the ATM fee than whatever rate you’ll get elsewhere. I try to take out how much I think I’ll need for the trip all in one go so I dont have to pay the ATM fee more than once.
Anon
Sorry I don’t think the target audience here is the kind that’s going to ignore popular/common advice about just using ATMs in the foreign country you go to and will tell you “yes, get Euros from AAA.” “Also, lol, that’s the kind of thing my grandparents used to do because they “didn’t trust banks” after having lived through the Great Depression.
Cat
You literally asked “Should I get Euros from AAA?” and the answer was no…
Anonymous
People answered. You just didn’t like the answer. I’ve gone to Europe (mostly via London) every year for the last 20 years except a couple years in the pandemic. I have never taken out cash before I left. Just go to the ATM at the airport if you need a bit. TM fees are very minimal. It’s like $5? Rates are not so different. Last time I got cash before I left was 1994 on a high school trip to France.
Anon
Whoa that was an unnecessarily angry response to people who are actually answering the question and giving you useful advice.
I think what you meant to say was thank you for taking the time to answer my question.
Anonymous
We just got back from Italy and got cash at an ATM at the airport with a great exchange rate. You can get by without them but my partner and I found it helpful to have Euros. We ate at one restaurant that did not take credit cards. We were also able to get a price reduction on a leather good by paying cash rather than by card. Your mileage may vary.
Anon
Talk to me about your jewelry wardrobe/preferences? What metals do you like, do you wear the same pieces every day or switch it up?
I am turning 40 soon, and gravitate towards minimalist jewelry. Have always worn silver jewelry (and a platinum wedding band/engagement ring) but am starting to wear brass jewelry. I have olive skin, and am noticing how appealing the trend of chunky small gold hoops and minimal gold chains looks, but feel hung up on mixing metals. Besides that, I like faux tortoiseshell hoop earrings, black and white geometric hoops and a classic silver Timex Waterbury watch. Dream pieces would be Elsa Peretti diamond by the yard earrings and necklaces. I don’t tend to wear any jewelry, including wedding ring during the summer because am always swimming/gardening (not that kind of gardening ;) )
Anon
I have a Qalo wedding ring but love earrings in different types, but 90% studs. Maybe a solid bracelet (like non-links) or a charm bracelet. I have 3 necklaces. On weekends, just the wedding ring unless I’m going out, then I do something, but just for then. I don’t wear real jewelry when I have on sloppy home clothes but I do when I put on a more real outfit.
Anon
I have all the metals and mix daily. I have a lot of rings I swap out which are a mix of gold and silver, I’ll add a bronze necklace with those, gold earrings . . . I have a lot of jewelry I like and I enjoy wearing it, so I don’t worry about mixing metals.
Anonymous
Same! I’ve never understood the hesitancy to mix metals. I love the way they look together. I wear a two-tone watch daily and then just whatever else I want.
Anon
I have lots of earrings but I tend to gravitate towards my pearl studs (various sizes), gold knot studs, silver Tiffany studs, or gold huggie hoops. I wish I had a pair of diamond studs – that would be a great gift for your 40th! I’m not big on wearing a lot of jewelry other than earrings, except for a simple gold stacking ring I wear on my right hand and occasionally a minimalist gold chain necklace. But every time I see a colleague at work who looks really stylish and put together I notice she’s wearing a lot more jewelry than me, so I wonder if I should be adding more.
Runcible Spoon
One economical way to get diamond studs inis in an “illusion setting,” which is basically several smaller diamonds set together to form a larger-looking stud earring. The earrings will look big, bold and beautiful, and no one will notice the setting unless they are up close and personal to your earlobe.
Anne-on
The CZ studs at Nordstrom (house brand) are pretty good dupes, and there are lots of CZ versions of the ‘by the yard’ necklaces btw.
Anon
Olive skin? Girl, you should be wearing gold. And mix away. I mix metals all day long, but favor gold (also olive skin).
anon
Also olive and I exclusively wear a handful of gold items: small hoops, slightly bigger hoops, station necklace, thin bangles.
Anon
I’m an earring person, I wear them every day. For some reason I think necklaces look weird on me so I don’t have any. I have a couple chain bracelets I wear every day – I like the look of bangles but they drive me nuts when I type.
Anon
As far as metals – lately I’ve been wearing a lot of large-format brass earrings. I’m a very pale redhead.
Anon
Oh boy. I have so much jewelry, it’s kind of my thing. I prefer pearls to gemstones and am a frequent customer of Kojima Pearl. I wear mostly gold and rose gold and I do mix them, but I also wear sometimes wear a stack of sterling bangles collected here and there and have no qualms about wearing these when I’m wearing gold on fingers, ears, or neck. Since WFH I usually go all out on earrings and no necklace (I have pretty strict rules about either/or but not both) and often a bracelet. I don’t work in bangles, they bug me, but I have a few interesting pearl bracelets I choose from most days.
But no, I’m never ever worried about mixing metals.
Anonymous
Jewelry is my thing. I can wear both white and yellow gold. Same for rose gold.
Mixing metals ….I usually wear everything in the same metal except for my ring which is white gold and I never worry about that.
I have all my dream pieces. But if I won the lottery I’d hightail it to Bulgari.
Anon
Should I tip for a sofa delivery? And how much? It’s a 96 inch three piece sectional. I live in an elevator building so no stairs are involved. I paid over $100 for the delivery fee so I’m not sure if tipping is expected.
Thank you to the person here who recommended Macy’s for mid-range furniture!
anon
Yes. Definitely.
Anon
Yes. Although I can’t give my tip as an example because my sofa missed fitting on the freight elevator by just an inch or so and the delivery guys had to come up five flights of stairs in an unairconditioned service stairwell in July in the SEUS. Let’s just say I parted with a lot of cash to two guys who looked like they were about to collapse and had sweat running off of them so badly it puddled on the floor and I had to mop once they were gone.
Runcible Spoon
Yes, please tip the delivery folks. They will orient you on how to attach and detach the sectional pieces, they will move the sofa around (within reason) until it is set just right. In sum, they are not just dropping off a package, they are customizing the delivery, which, yes, you paid extra for, but they don’t see those extra bucks, and it’s just a nice thing to do. Maybe about $15-20 each, more or less? That shouldn’t break the bank, but also is not so low as to be insulting.
Anon
Yes, I agree with the above. I typically tip $20 per person for furniture delivery even if it is one item.
Anon
I’m an in house attorney, and after years of WFH, I have no suits that fit well. Up until now, that’s been fine, and I’ve been getting buy with (clearly different) separates. Next month, I have a business formal event that I will fly to, and I want to buy a new suit. What color, fabric, style would you get for versatility and ease of travel?
Cat
I’d try for a matching sheath & jacket in charcoal, navy, or black.
Anon
I would never want to travel in a sheath dress. Nightmare fuel. I agree a dress and jacket can be more versatile style-wise but sheath dresses are not comfortable when you have to be on the move a lot.
OP – the questions you’re asking about color, fabric, style, etc. all heavily depend on how often you will be wearing the suit and where you will be wearing it. Unless you work in a super-formal field I would not go super-formal/somber with the suit. I think suits these days look fresh and current when they’re not the very traditional cuts or traditional dark colors. I would go back through Kat’s Suit of the Week posts for the last several months and see what you like – she’s featured some nice ones from The Fold, Theory, Ann Taylor and some other places (Banana Republic, maybe). Unless you have money to burn or really think you’ll be able to get a lot of mileage out of this suit, I would not spend a lot of money on it. Personally, if I could fit into The Fold I would buy something from The Fold, and if that didn’t work, I would buy something from Banana Republic – the main site, not the factory site.
anon
As an attorney, I would buy a nice suit in wool or tropical wool in a conservative but not black color or maybe a subtle stripe or check. If it’s business formal, the men will be in wool suits, and so should you. Get it tailored. I love sheath dress suiting but agreed it’s not great for actual travel (ie get off the plane and go directly to the event) – it’s more because I prefer one less choice of finding a blouse to wear. Pants do not look as formal on me with flats or low heels (and I can’t do real heels for long these days) so I opt for skirt suit if not sheath dress.
Again, this is coming from a place of lawyer business formal – this to me means actual suit, and the quality/fabric/tailoring to make it look awesome on you. Could be a bit more colorful than what you’d wear to court, but in my opinion not much and only if it’s a very nice fabric. I want a power suit, not a church suit, if you know what I mean?
Anon
FWIW I think the sheath + jacket look is a little outdated and maybe not easy for travel – I think a pant suit would be a better choice.
Cat
I mean it would be in the suitcase, right? I didn’t think the OP was asking to literally fly IN it. My thought was the sheath and jacket is less likely to look dated since pant styles come and go more quickly than the cut of a sheath.
Anonymous
I would never, ever fly in business attire. Too much risk of sweat, spilled drinks, snack crumbs, etc. If I am going straight from the airport to a work event I change in the airport restroom after I get off the plane.
anon
Same. Dresses fit me 10000000x better than pants or skirts though.
Anonymous
Same. I can never find suit pants that fit right, even with tailoring.
Anonymous
There are a lot of great pant suits out now. Does Theory fit you?
Anon
Personally I like a black suit with an interesting blouse and shoes. I’d look at Veronica Beard and get a Dickey jacket with matching black pants. Unless you’re arguing in court, that’s formal for formal business and you can break it up easier later.
Anon
PS – they make it in a scuba fabric that’s great for travel
No Face
Most of my suits are sheath and jacket, but for travel I like Ann Taylor suits in bi-stretch. My favorite has the cutaway blazer and the side-zip straight leg pants.
ollie
MM LaFleur has great suiting for travel
Anne-on
I look deathly ill in black so my suits are all either grey or navy. I tend to get a blazer, pants, and then a suiting dress that can stand on it’s own (long or 3/4 sleeves). Boss, Hobbs, Theory, The Fold, and Brooks Brothers tend to have the best options – St. John is amazing at travel friendly sutis but they are obviously $$
Anon
Please buy the The Fold Belleville top and matching either skirt or pants so I can live vicariously through you.
Going to China
I am going back to China for the first time in 10 years. I have elderly family members living in Shanghai who are not very tech savvy. My firm is forbidding me from bringing my personal device since I use that for work as well. I also heard everything is cashless at least in Shanghai where I will be staying. I am stressed out about how to actually pay for anything there. My firm will give me a burner phone but I doubt they’d let me install alipay or wechat on that phone… I know this is a long shot but anyone who has been to China (mainland) since covid wouldn’t mind sharing their experience, that would be much appreciated!
Anonymous
You need to ask for a work phone and then completely remove all work stuff from your personal phone. WTF you should never have work things on your personal phone.
Going to China
It is very typical in a big law firm to have a choice. I would say a majority of people I work with have work emails on their phone. And I have been in biglaw for 10 years…
anon
Most people at my firm chose to have two phones precisely for this reason – and also because if the firm was ever involved in litigation, your personal phone would be subject to discovery (even if partitioned) and I did not want to turn over my personal device. I don’t (and didn’t when I was at the firm) do any work related communications on my personal phone. I would ask now for a firm phone and take your work email and apps off your personal phone, but that’s just me.
anon
I have it all on one phone and so do most of my colleagues. My life is already intertwined with work. I’ve been in big law for 12 years and seriously can’t imagine having carried around two phones for all of that time for no real reason. Sure, there’s a theoretical risk of litigation on one of my matters, but I’m not going to torture myself for such a theoretical risk.
Anon
No, you get two phones. One for work that you pay for with BYOD money and another that you pay for with your salary. It’s stupid to commingle the two.
Anon
Yea I don’t know why anyone would want work emails on their personal phone. I prefer total separation.
Anon
For most people, it’s very normal to have your work Outlook and/or Teams/Slack on your personal phone…… much more manageable and low maintenance than bringing two phones everywhere.
Anonymous
Literally no one I know does this. One phone is for old guys who don’t know better.
anon
Literally everyone i know but one person does this, soooo.
Anonymous
my company actually gives you a stipend each month if you use your personal phone for work things so you dont have to get a work phone
Anon
Everyone I know who doesn’t work in a high-security job where they are banned from having work stuff on their personal phone has one phone and uses that phone for both work and personal use. So your experience isn’t universal.
Anon
My workplace is the opposite; we all have work phones and most of us have personal stuff on our work phones. Our regulating authority explicitly warns that if you separate church and state, they can and do require people to hand over both devices. Only the most paranoid people maintain a separate personal-only device.
Anon
Except it is actually quite difficult to compel the production of a personal phone if you do not use it for work.
Anon
I’m not a lawyer or in another profession with sensitive data, but it’s common in my workplace to have work email on a personal device. My work even gives me a subsidy for my personal cell phone bill because it’s used partly for work. “you should never have work things on your personal phone” seems like an overreaction.
Anon
I was in the same situation in a previous job – I got $50/month toward my cell phone bill because it was way cheaper for the company to let me use my own phone for work purposes than issue me a cell phone and pay the bill, etc. I am not sure why people are so adamant that “no one” does this or it “never happens” because the majority of people I know don’t have two cell phones, one work and one personal – I have two, but I work in an environment where I do access sensitive data, and it’s actually completely prohibited for me to put work information (emails, etc.) on my personal devices. If I could just have one phone, I totally would, as keeping up with two phones can be a hassle. It doesn’t help that one phone is an iPhone and the other is an Android.
Cat
Most places have gone to a BYOD policy so good luck enforcing that!
Anon
This.
Anon 2.0
This is an interesting response. In MANY industries it is very typical to use your personal phone for work. We are required to download our secure email software on our personal phones and I’ve never heard of anyone pushing back. Not saying you’re wrong, just interesting.
Anon
Yes, I’ve worked at non-profits that had no money and we had to use our personal phones for work, but the company gave us a stipend for our phone bill.
anon again
Yes, I see this with clients all the time as a litigator who collects discovery. And that’s exactly why I have two phones and keep my lives separate. I don’t want my company or the government to be in a position to know what I search on the browser on my phone, for example! But I understand that it’s no longer the norm – to me, the risk to my privacy is not worth the slight inconvenience of carrying two phones.
Anon
No one can stop you from buying your own phone too. They’re just saying they expect you to check a phone and will pay for one. You can and should have your own.
Anon
Can’t you use credit cards?
Going to China
From what I understand, the stores do not take foreign credit cards. It’s alipay or wechat or nothing.
Anon
Could you just delete the work apps from your personal phone while you’re there? Sorry if that’s a dumb question, but it was my first thought!
Going to China
Unfortunately, IT says no… I think their worry is if spyware somehow makes it way to my personal, they would need to wipe it before they can reinstall the work stuff.
Anon
You should consider taking a personal burner phone with you to China as well as a work burner – neither phone should have files. photos, stored passwords, etc. on them and you should be able to factory-reset them with a couple of button-pushes, to dump information you don’t want the Chinese government to get their hands on. I worked in a company that had significant business dealings in China and a couple of our execs went over there and had their personal phones confiscated at the airport (the reason given was that there was a “possible data security threat”) and then later returned, presumably after they’d downloaded everything off the phone so the Chinese government could examine their data.
I would not travel to China with anything but burner/newly-installed devices with basically no personal files or un-wipeable information on them. The Chinese government is well-known for wanting to perform surveillance on foreign visitors, exceeding what they perform on their own citizens.
Anonymous
You work in big law. Just buy a new personal smartphone for the trip.
Anon
Now is the time to get your own personal phone. It is bananas to me that anyone in 2023 would use their personal phone for work, especially a lawyer.
NotInstaFamous
When I went last month, I took a work burner phone for email, wiped my personal phone before going, and then wiped my personal phone again after coming back. Then IT let me reinstall my email on my personal phone.
Anon
+1 this is the way if you are unwilling to have two phones.
Anon
How did you remember/know people’s contact information while you were there and did not have your Contacts on your phone?
Emma
Can you just buy a cheap phone while there? Apologies if this is a stupid question since I’m not familiar with China, but I go to Europe a lot so I have a cheap “Euro” phone and get pay-as-you-go Sim cards when I’m there. I have all the relevant local apps I need installed on it, and avoids crossover issues and roaming fees with my work phone.
anon
+1 This is the correct answer. Buy a cheap local branded phone (OPPO, Xiaomi, etc) and pay-as-you-go SIM and install Alipay/Wechat. I believe Alipay can link with some foreign debit cards. You’re correct that you need Alipay/Wechat to pay for stuff; cash/credit cards will be extremely inconvenient.
I’m from China FWIW.
Anonymous
OMG – two phones. I’m in local govt and even I know to say no when they ask if I want to use one phone for both. Yes it’s a pain to carry two phones but that’s what you do. I don’t know anyone who has one phone.
Anon
Everyone I know has one phone.
Cat
Yeah, no one I know has two phones. Employers issuing a company device went by the wayside like a decade ago.
anon
Eh, when I was at my law firm, we all used our own (although the firm issued “China phones” for attorneys traveling to HK/mainland China) but now that I’m in-house, the company prefers that you use a corporate issued phone. This is a large name-brand corporation that you have heard of.
Anon
Truly depends on your industry. We are not given the choice where I work. Absolutely no work stuff on personal phones and everyone who needs one is issued a work phone. Now, that doesn’t stop you from using your work phone for personal stuff, but it doesn’t work the other way around.
I will never ever merge phones. Been carrying two on weekdays for over a decade. It’s really not that hard!
Anon
I wasn’t given the choice to have a dedicated work phone.
NYCer
I am so surprised by these responses. My husband has two phones (he works in finance), and he is literally the only person I know who has two! I must run in different circles than everyone saying that don’t know anyone who has one phone.
Anon
I think it’s one very assertive person.
Anon
I think so too. I know maybe one person with 2 phones, and I’m a lawyer and am friends with people in banking, healthcare, etc.
Anon
Just to be contrary, most people where I work use two phones. Nobody here wants work to be able to remotely wipe their phone or seize it for an investigation.
Anon
How does having work email on your personal phone allow work to remotely wipe your phone? They don’t have my passwords or anything.
anon
This information should be in your company’s bring your own device policy.
Anon
I see you haven’t read the BYOD agreement/policy.
Anon
I’m asking technically how would this work, not whether or not they have the legal authority to do it. I don’t understand how logging into email and Slack would give them the ability to wipe the phone remotely.
Anecdata
The device management software I had to install to get work apps required agreement to allowing work to remotely wipe your whole device, not just the work stuff (and I know people it’s happened to). But our company won’t issue work phones unless you have a few very specific titles. I’m not super comfortable with the byod-policy, but in the end … it’s worth it to me to be able to eg. take an early morning or late evening call on the road; or stay on top of emails throughout the day while traveling and not have to catch up in a big block in the evening
January
I’m so surprised by this – I used to have two phones, then changed to an employer that does not issue phones. I thought that was the norm nowadays.
Anonymous
Do you work with sensitive/classified/protected information?
Anonymous
Definitely not with all employers. I have been seeing the dual-phone thing more and more lately. My husband works at an insurance company that issues company phones, so everyone there has a personal phone and a work phone. All the feds I know carry two phones. I am surprised that lawyers and business executives would not have separate phones, that any employer concerned about security would allow BYOD without a lot of controls and monitoring, and that any employee would allow their employer to control or monitor their personal phone.
Anonymous
I would use this as an excuse to get a new phone. Load all work stuff onto new phone. Delete from current phone. Use current phone while on China. Ditch current phone and start using new phone when you get home.
Seraphina
Wow, this thread turned into a debate about whether to have work on your personal phone, which wasn’t your question at all!
I was just in Shanghai a few months ago (though just for a week, and mostly followed family around). How long will you be staying, and what do you plan to do there? If it’s short and you’ll mostly be with your family, you might be okay just doing what they do. Otherwise, I think the play is to get a second cheaper phone (you can get a phone for ~$100) and a Chinese sim card.
You’ll want to install Didi for taxis. In some places you can still hail a taxi on the street, but it’s a lot harder than it used to be – everyone hails via Didi. I had some trouble registering my US credit card so you make sure you have time to futz around with it.
Many places I went did still take cash, but having wechat/alipay will be safer.
Keep the sim card after you get back, I know people who have run into issues when they register on a phone number, lose the old phone number, and have a lot of issues re-registering when they can’t access the old number.
Anonymous
Shanghai will blow you away with its technology and infrastructure. Most stuff is cashless. Get a personal phone and install Alipay and didi (the local Lyft).
Anonymous
Tips for better tasting tofu, preferably on the grill? We’re trying to introduce some alternative proteins in our diet for a number of reasons but mainly to reduce the grocery bill, more variety, and health/weight loss. DH does all the cooking and he is a very meat and potatoes kind of guy. We’ve been eating at home more (to save money) and instead of losing weight like I’d hoped I have been gaining weight. Which I suppose is to be expected when I swap out salads for steak and potatoes but in any event I’d like it to stop. DH tried to grill extra firm tofu with a dry rub and he did not like it at all, it was pretty flavorless. I had suggested a marinade but he was concerned the tofu would fall apart. He is willing to give tofu another shot, but he was already sort of biased against it and this experience did not help. Suggestions for better tofu? Or any other healthy low calorie things to grill? He’ll cook things not on the grill too but this time of year he prefers being outside. We also have a turkey-sized air fryer outside if anyone knows of low calorie options for that.
Anon
Press the tofu to get all of the water out. Grill tofu. Add sauce after it has been grilled.
You can also marinate tofu (I like soy, lime, and ginger) and then grill it.
That said, I have found that tofu works best when cooked in a heavy-bottomed sauté pan.
If you want alternate proteins that work well on the grill, try black bean burgers.
Anon
This. And you might want to use a hinged grill pan like you would for a fish filet.
Cb
Eh, I think unless it’s fried and dipped in a nice sauce, tofu is just a bit tasteless. I’d think about other things you might be able to grill to give you that meat substitute. Portobello mushrooms, etc.
Anonymous
This. Press out all the water and fry it to get it nice and crispy. Grill vegetables instead.
Anon
As someone who has been vegetarian for 30 years, I don’t generally think of tofu as great on the grill, as it does tend to fall apart. When I eat tofu, I usually eat it scrambled instead of eggs or in something Asian inspired, either baked or stir fried. And in general, I eat a lot more beans than I do tofu, so maybe grilled veggies or portobello mushrooms and a bean salad for protein? Or burritos with grilled veggies, corn, refried beans, salsa, guac, etc?
PolyD
Air fryers make pretty good tofu. I found a recipe where I press it, marinate in soy sauce, maybe a teaspoon of sesame oil, and some cornstarch and then fry it. It’s not as good as restaurant stuff, but it’s not bad at all!
Anonymous
https://itdoesnttastelikechicken.com/?s=Grill
Anon
If I were grilling tofu, I would make sure it’s pressed as much as possible and then paint it with a wet marinade like you would a meat protein. Then top it with more marinade after its cooked. Tofu is bland AF so if you don’t want to fry it, douse those suckers with some marinade/sauce.
anonshmanon
I’ve never been happy when painting or otherwise covering just the surface of tofu with a marinade. I press tofu and then fully soak it in marinade, and that brings some good flavor.
I usually do a base of soy sauce, and enhance with liquid smoke, spices, citrus juice, garlic, sesame oil, depending on what I have lying around.
Anonymous
try soy curls? you can skillet saute them and then mix with grilled veggies + some sauce/marinade. i like soy curls better than tofu though air fried tofu is pretty good so long as the sauce is good.
Anonymous
Tofu isn’t good. Why not chicken? Or fish?
anon
You need to marinate it and I think it’s better in a stir fry than on the grill. What you could try on the grill is haloumi cheese. It’s very yummy grilled and then used in a taco for the protein.
Anon
We often bake tofu with Buffalo sauce or BBQ sauce. It makes for a good alternative to meat and adds variation to the Asian dishes. Not sure if you could do this on a grill — maybe if you put it on some type of platter.
Anon
i like the methodology on cookie and kate. it’s really good!
Anonymous
Buy extra firm tofu and freeze it. Then thaw and either press and marinate, or I have been thawing and boiling it and then pressing out excess liquid. The freezing causes ice crystals that increase the penetration of your sauce and the boiling has been a super easy way to give it a tougher texture. I then stir fry it in sauce after and it soaks up all the liquid. Also try to use oil in your marinade as well ti keep a firmer texture.
Not sure if any of that helps for the grill- but definitely helps my husband and I enjoy tofu!
anon
For cheaper alternative sources of protein, I would look to beans, cheese, and nuts as opposed to tofu, tempeh, and seitan. But I also think that trying to replicate a steak and potatoes kind of meal just without the steak isn’t the right approach.
Nesprin
Tofu needs a crust + a sauce- grilling will just not work for tofu. Press out moisture + airfry, then top with intensely flavored sauces. Don’t bother marinating, tofu is a sponge.
My fav is to fry up chopped green onions, chilli- broadbean sauce (or whatever chili sauce you can find- I can vouch for chill-blackbean sauce, chilli-garlic sauce etc), sugar, soy sauce and a splash of mirin then add crisped tofu.
Anon
Try this: https://cookieandkate.com/how-to-make-crispy-baked-tofu/
anon
+1 – I’m a lifelong vegetarian and tofu lover, and this is the best way to prepare flavorful tofu. Even my meat-loving husband loves dishes that I make with this tofu!
Anan
We eat a lot of tofu and grilling isn’t my favorite method of cooking it, unless it’s smothered in sauce. Having said that – this recipe from The Green Barbeque is pretty fantastic – you grill the tofu then eat it with grilled tomatoes.
https://thehappyfoodie.co.uk/recipes/rukmini-iyers-vietnamese-griddled-tofu-with-tomatoes-and-spring-onions/
I find tempeh is better for grilling – both in terms of taste and texture; It also skewers better than tofu.
Anon
I’ve had great tempeh but never when I’ve prepared it myself. Do you have any marinades you recommend?
Anan
this is one of my favorite tempeh marinades:
https://www.badmanners.com/recipes/hippie-tlta-sammie
Anon
I prefer the taste and texture of tempeh to tofu. Perhaps try that?
Sally’s Baking Addiction bean patties are really, really good as well. They also freeze nicely and are good crumbled on a salad, if you make a batch that ends up not holding their patty shape well. https://sallysbakingaddiction.com/best-black-bean-burgers/
llama paws
Everyone I know prefers smoked tofu. It has a very different texture and flavour and would probably stay together if you grilled it.
Anon
The pic for this post on the front page is a cute short sleeved striped top, but when I click on the post it changes to this embroidered top. I wish I knew where the striped top is from though!
Anonymous
I think the striped one is the Meave Harmon Sweater Tee at Antrho (in Dark Green). Link to follow.
Anonymous
https://www.anthropologie.com/shop/maeve-harmon-jacquard-sweater-tee?color=037&type=STANDARD&quantity=1
Cat
https://www.anthropologie.com/shop/maeve-harmon-jacquard-sweater-tee?color=037&type=STANDARD&quantity=1
Anon
Thank you!!
Audible Books
I have audible credit I want to use up before I cancel my subscription. If you have a book that you particularly loved in that format, I would appreciate recommendations. I am currently listening to ‘Remarkably Bright Creatures.’ ‘All the Beauty in the World’ is next up in my queue.
Anon
Deacon King Kong!
Also Demon Copperhead!
JoJo
Daisy Jones and the Six – it’s a full cast, and it’s amazing.
Anonymous
Project Hail Mary
Anon
I love celeb memoirs read by the author.
Anonymous
Good for a Girl was a great audio read.
anon
An old one, but wonderful: Snow Falling on Cedars. I just finished listening to it.
Anan
An old one, but wonderful: Snow Falling on Cedars. I just finished listening to it.
Anonymous
Anything by Colson Whitehead, but especially Nickel Boys.
BookAnon
Covenant of Water (Verghese)
The Lying Life of Adults (Ferrante)
The Last White Man (Hamid)
A Visit from the Goon Squad and
Candy House (both Egan)
Say Nothing (Radden Keefe)
Smokey
I haven’t yet listened to it or read the book, but I understand that Meryl Streep reads Tom Lake, Anne Patchett’s newest book.
Anon
I keep getting ads on IG for Thrive mascara – has anyone tried it? I have really sensitive eyes and I’m always looking for a good mascara. I’m using an Ilia mascara right now which doesn’t irritate my eyes but it tends to smear.
Anonymous
I love Thrive mascara. Long lashes, no raccoon eyes, and the tubing makes it so easy to remove.
Anon
I was very unimpressed. It barely showed up on my lashes and I felt totally duped by their great ads.
Anon
Thank you for saving my money :)
Anon
I have an iPhone pro max. After a couple of years of abuse, I replaced the case and glass. Now it doesn’t recognize my face despite seeing me more clearly. No changes in hair, makeup, or glasses. How do I go back to my phone recognizing what I look like?
Cat
You can redo the face ID – have it rescan you.
texasanon
I’ve been called for Grand Jury service. I deferred a few years ago and so I have to serve now.
I’m an attorney, anyone have any idea of whether I will be used or just dismissed right away?
Anon
An associate at my big law firm was chosen as a grand juror. This was in NYC. I am no expert, but perhaps given the different nature of a grand jury, they are less concerned about selecting lawyers…I’ve wondered ever since, because I’ve never heard of a lawyer being chosen for normal jury service.
Anon
I’m a lawyer and was on a regular jury.
anon
I have ALWAYS wanted to be on one, but I always get dismissed. Was it a criminal case or civil? What was it like? so curious.
Runcible Spoon
I am a trial attorney and I have served on a trial jury twice — once a criminal case (assault and kidnapping) and once a quasi-criminal case (civil lawsuit by battered wife seeking damages, i.e. lost wages, medical costs, from estranged husband). But I am in a high-ratio lawyer region, so dismissing lawyers might leave the litigants with almost no jurors left in the pool.
Anon
I don’t think you’ll be dismissed simply for being an attorney. I’m an attorney and have served on a jury, and so has my dad. My dad tried a case once where there was a judge on the jury.
Anon
In my jurisdiction, there is little to disqualify you from grand jury service because there are no lawyers to strike jurors. Lawyers are equally likely to serve and often do when summoned.
Anon
I am a lawyer and had to serve on the grand jury for an 18-month term. It was definitely hard to manage.
Anon
I should add that I have also been selected to serve on a petit jury as a lawyer. I don’t think it’s the automatic disqualification many lawyers believe it to be.
An.On.
My attorney boss served on a grand jury, but he was also the kind of person who thought it was his responsibility and did not even try to get himself excused, so no idea if he could have been.
Anon
it can be very hard to be dismissed from grand jury duty bc you aren’t actually making a final decision, you are just deciding whether or not to indict someone. i had grand jury duty for two weeks in NYC as a law student
Lisa
Can someone tell me where to find the green and navy striped sweater that’s on the home page, before you click through to the embroidered Anthro blouse???
Cat
https://www.anthropologie.com/shop/maeve-harmon-jacquard-sweater-tee?color=035&type=STANDARD&quantity=1
Lisa
thank you!!!!!!!
Anon
But it’s polyester!!!!!
(joking obvs, it’s super cute and if I was a less-sweaty person I’d be all over it)
Anonymous
Has anyone read a good blog post on boots and jeans for fall recently? I need new of both, suitable for general NYC life and a long weekend in Paris. Mostly looking for something my 40 year old self will feel comfortable with, so doesn’t need to be cutting edge but not aggressively glaringly dated.
Anon
Not a blog post, but this article has some options: https://www.glamour.com/gallery/best-fall-boots
oldladylawyer
what’s the on trend neutral (not black) for a dressy dress? wearing a navy lace dress– nude? silver? gold? i’m buying something so just as soon get something that looks current.
Anon
My vote for a navy dress would be gold.
Senior Attorney
+1
Cat
+2
wild card would be something like an icy blue suede, but that would work with some dresses / fabrics and not others.
Anon
Do you mean shoe color?
oldladylawyer
yes. shoes. sorry
Anonymous
Are you asking about shoes, or about something else?
Anonymous
The metallic that looks best on you.
Pants shopping
I need new jeans and want to shop in person—really tired of mail order roulette. 5’3” pear (probably a 10 or 12 in jeans?), in San Francisco, happy to go to the Peninsula, North Bay, or East Bay if there’s somewhere with a great selection I can try on a bunch of stuff. Recommendations?
Anokha
I would consider a major department store — I’ve previously had luck at Nordstroms and Bloomingdales. For Nordstrom: I made a personal stylist appointment, told them my size, and asked them to pull different jeans in that size/style, so that it was all waiting for me when I got there!
anon
This is a good idea. I found my best fitting pair of jeans this way. Of course, they were totally expensive and I felt pressure to buy them because of the time the stylist spends in trying to fit you, but if it is as hard for you as it is for me to find a pair of jeans that fit it may be worth it.
I just strongly recommend NOT having their in house tailor hem them immediately to your preferred shoe, especially if they are very expensive. When the Nordstrom stylist pressured me into buying a pair of pants that cost $275 and I realized when I got home they were not right/not practical/too expensive…. it was too late because the savvy stylist had their in house tailor immediately take in the hem for me. So not it was altered. And I couldn’t return them.
Pants shopping
Thanks! I like this idea and would love it if someone local could point me in the direction of the best bet among the various local department store outposts–I know that in general, among Nordstrom in downtown SF vs. Corte Madera vs. San Mateo vs. San Jose, all have different selections (and I assume the same is true of the couple local Bloomingdale’s), but I don’t actually know how they differ or if one or any of them would be better from the “trying lots of jeans” perspective.
Surely someone is going to show up to tell me to stop being such an idiot, all department stores have millions of jeans, just go to one and try some on, so maybe that’s the answer and if so I’ll deal, but like I said, love to hear if anyone local recommends any particular spot (even a particular department store spot).
Anokha
I did the above approach with the Nordstrom in SF on Market Street to great success. But I think it’s closing down…
Sallyanne
San Jose Valleyfair Nordstrom. If it’s a fail, Bloomingdale’s is in the small mall (but I prefer Nordstrom for denim).
BayAnon
Second the decision to go to a department store for the best selection. In the Bay Area I’ve only been to the Nordstroms in downtown SF (Westfield mall) which I heard is/will be closing, and the one in Walnut Creek. Between those two, Nordstroms in Walnut Creek had a much better selection (there’s also a Madewell and other jeans stores in that mall). Another alternative depending on your price range is the shops on Fillmore in Pac Heights; there’s Paige and Frame and Rag and Bone there. The last pair of jeans I bought – that I wore pretty much every weekend for two years until I got too pregnant for them – were the Cate fit from Rag and Bone.
Pants shopping
Thanks, this is really helpful! Fillmore/Pac Heights is incredibly close and easy for me, and I’m pretty willing to spend, so if someone wants to endorse a great pair of jeans for a pear from Paige, Frame, Rag and Bone (or anything else that might be there) I’m all ears; barring that, though, Walnut Creek Nordstrom seems like a good fit.
Sallyanne
Mother denim- hustler (straight), weekender (flare) and tomcat (slim boyfriend) work well for my pear -ish shape. My advice is go well rested, well fed and with a sense of humor. I put Jean shopping on par with bathing suit shopping.
Anonymous
Not for stores, but as a fellow pear I have had good luck with a couple of not very glamorous jeans brands; jeans from Talbots and NYDJ. Madewell almost fit.
Anon
Has anyone ordered jewelry from Quince? I have my eye on these earrings and am wondering about the quality.
https://www.quince.com/women/14k-gold-bold-small-hoop?color=white-gold&gender=women&tracker=collection_page__women%2Fnew-arrivals__All%20Products__7
Anon8
I have! Very happy with the earrings I bought from there. I’ve left them in my cartilage piercings for about a year without taking them out and they look great and haven’t irritated my sensitive skin.
Anonymous
Has anyone trained themselves to talk more slowly, at least at work? I slow down for presentations or when I’m first meeting someone (ie when I’m “on”) but I default to a faster speed for everyday interactions. I feel like slower talkers come off as more authoritative and knowledgeable. I worry that my faster speed reads as unsophisticated. Tips or tricks?