Tuesday’s TPS Report: Axel Dress

Elie Tahari Axel Dress | CorporetteOur daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

The colorblocking trend continues to be a strong one, and I think it’s done extraordinarily well on this dress from Elie Tahari — you get a very streamlined silhouette without looking like you’re wearing one of those bikini t-shirts. Plus, I love the colorblocked asymetrical keyhole detail — I don’t think I’ve seen that before, and I really like it. The dress was $398, but is now marked to $238.80 at Saks. Elie Tahari Axel Dress

Here’s a lower-priced option and a plus-size alternative.

Seen a great piece you’d like to recommend? Please e-mail [email protected]

Update: I just noticed the Beauty.com Friends & Family 20% off sale is here — great time to stock up on makeup or makeup tools like a T3 or Clarisonic (see last year’s 2012’s thread to see what people thought of various beauty products).


  1. Bad GRE score :

    Has anyone here gotten a really low practice score on the math section of the GRE? I absolutely tanked it during a practice test last week (after not having taken a math class of any kind for seven years) and I’m really feeling like an idiot. I didn’t study at all and I know that I will do better after reviewing some of the concepts I’ve forgotten, but I’m wondering – has anyone done really badly and then managed to score significantly higher after studying? How much of a score bump can reasonably be expected when your baseline is really low?

    • anon-oh-no :

      this is going back a while, but the first time I took the LSAT practice test, I did terrible. I mean, really, really bad (50th percentile or something crazy like that). I also didn’t study or anything the first time. But then i studied a bunch and when the actual LSAT rolled around, I did great.

      I wouldn’t put too much stock into your first practice test. But study. and take a course if necessary.

    • Were you reasonably good at high school math when you first took it? If so, I think you can expect to improve your score pretty significantly. I would bet that your problem is that you’ve forgotten the stuff like trigonometry that you haven’t used much since then. But if you learned it fine once, you’ll be able to do it again (probably much more quickly).

      • +1

        I think a little depends on how truly “really bad” you did. I don’t nkow how the GREs are scored now, but back when I took them, they were out of 800. I got something in the mid 500s the first time, then spent about 3 hours studying, took another practice test and scored in the mid 600s. I was pretty much already a shoe-in for the grad program I was applying to and all I needed to seal the deal was a score in the low/mid 600s. I took the test a few weeks later and I hit my goal…though I can’t tell you what score I got. I took the SATs once, scored a 1400, and called it done becaue that was the “Free ride” threshold for my state school (where I did not go, but that was the mental threshold I set for myself because I had better things to do than study for the SATs in high school…like nap). As you can see I am not the most aggressive test prep-er.

        My DH, on the other hand, was applying to really competitive MBA programs. He took his first practice test and got i nthe 600s, then studied pretty hard (mostly refreshing vocuabulary and old math concepts) and ended up with –I think– a 780 in math and a 750 in verbal. Which was just about where he landed on the SATs as well.

      • +1 from me too.

        Not an answer to your specific question because I haven’t taken the GRE, but I needed to do a similar math placement test (algebra, trig, geometry, statistics, basic calc) and bombed the practice initially. I got a couple math textbooks out of the public library and worked through the sections that I clearly didn’t remember over the next week or two. I was very good at math in school, but had gone many years without using it much in my daily life. I killed it on the actual test. If you’re just rusty, you can probably expect a big score bump.

    • I studied my butt off, got 750+ in practice, which is consistent with my high school and college math performance, and then choked in the actual test. Point being, it’s not a great indicator either way, in my opinion. Use it as a study tool, for sure, but it’s not the be-all and end-all of your studying… don’t get too upset by it.

      • Same here on GMATs. I studied 50 hours on math alone between GMATs and ended up getting a lower math score on the second test (and it wasn’t high to begin with).

        • I took a prep course before I took the GMATs and still got a low score on the math. And I had just gotten my BS, so I had taken recent math courses…but nothing like what was on the test. When I was admitted to my MBA program, they wanted me to take a remedial math course. I appealed it and aced every MBA course.

          • Anonymous :

            I wonder if that route could be open for me. I did well in my finance classes at top-ranked undergrad, passed CFA Level 1 exam on first try and have been in finance ever since. The GMAT’s math section and I just don’t seem to mix (and my verbal is in the 99th percentile).

    • I only started taking GRE practice tests (this was about a year ago) after I had been studying quite a bit. However, I’m positive that I would have done very poorly if I had taken a test before studying. There were so many formulas that I had forgotten, that were essential to the test. So yes, I think you can do much better after studying, especially if you give yourself a few weeks*

      *I only gave myself a few days, and was still pretty happy with the results. I just majorly crammed all of the formulas, and probably wouldn’t remember any of them now.

      • Also, to contrast with some of the other posters– after I finished studying, my score on the final practice test I took was very similar (if not slightly higher) to the score I received on the actual test. I took the new test, the one that’s out of 170 for each section.

    • Anonymous :

      I got consistently really bad scores when I took a few practice tests, and then I got an 800 on the real thing. I definitely felt like my practice was harder. I don’t know how typical this is, but I’d imagine that if you study a good bit and have a low baseline, you’re likely to do much better. But definitely, definitely give yourself time. Studying a lot is key.

    • To add to this question, what practice tests did you use when studying? My understanding is that the Princeton Review ones are easier than the actual test so they aren’t terribly helpful, but maybe I’m misremembering and that’s just for specific practice questions in their books. Any tips?

      • I did a lot of research on which review book was best, since I left myself a very short time to study. I ended up with the official ETS book and CD with practice tests and was very happy with it. As I said above, the final practice test scores I got were almost exactly what I got on the actual test.

        The Magoosh GRE bl*g/webs*te was also very helpful to me– free tutorials.

      • I don’t know what my previous comment is in moderation–

        I did a lot of research on which review book was best, since I left myself a very short time to study. I ended up with the official ETS book and CD with practice tests and was very happy with it. As I said above, the final practice test scores I got were almost exactly what I got on the actual test.

        The Magoosh GRE bl*g was also a great resource– free tutorials.

      • I don’t know the answer to this specific question re Princeton Review math, but I taught test prep (for a variety of exams) for years and would recommend using real retired tests as the only indication of preparedness. Test prep companies only get close to the real thing when they create tbeir own questions and question sets.
        Editing to add: I posted this before reading the comment above, but we apparently have similar experiences.
        I also agree that with math, there is a very strong likelihood of improvement with study if the issue is merely forgotten concepts and esoecially if you were math-proficient before.

      • Bad GRE score :

        I used Princeton Review – if that version was easier, then I’m really screwed! It’s surprisingly hard to find this answer online, but does anyone know if the ETS powerprep software consists of real, retired tests?

        Thanks everyone! Really hoping some studying will help…

    • Yup. I can’t remember what my math score was and it certainly wasn’t all that great, but it went up quite a bit after studying. I’ve never been awesome at math, but with a refresher on stuff like trig, quicker ways to handle algebra, practice getting back into the problem-solving mindset, time management, guessing strategies, etc., I got adequate scores for my program. Fortunately fantastic math scores were not necessary for me, but I managed to do what I needed to get in and I’m sure you will too!

    • Just study some high school and even middle school math and complete the exercises in books like Kaplan’s GRE guide or Barron’s GRE guide. You will be good to go.

    • I took the GMAT for the first time and scored in the 40s percentile-wise. I re-took and got in the mid-60s, which ended up being enough for the MBA program I wanted. The math itself was ok for me – it was the timing, and the types of questions I needed practice with.

  2. Birthday help needed! :

    So I’ve been busy being a new mom, working full time, and generally keeping the house together while my husband was on a 2 week business trip…he got back this weekend and today is his birthday.

    I’m working from home today and have blocked off two hours of my schedule to prep / do something related to his birthday. I’m thinking I can knock out a cake and dinner in that timeframe. In another universe, I’d take him to dinner…but we have a very young toddler and more often than not, dinner out is more stress than it’s worth.

    Any sure-fire cake ideas that don’t take all day? Any dinner suggestions? Any last minute present ideas? I do have a present “from the baby” which is a really nice framed photo of her for his desk (he doesn’t have one).

    thanks in advance!

    • anon-oh-no :

      why don’t you buy the cake and then focus on dinner? two hours doesn’t seem like a lot of time to make dinner and a cake.

      and my husband is always partial to meals that revolve around a good steak. you could make a risotto and maybe some green beans or asparagus to go with it.

      • Birthday help needed! :

        I could, but neither he nor I really like store-bought cake. I was thinking of getting a fancy tart or something I DEFINITELY wouldn’t make, but he just said the other day how much he’s looking forward to eating leftover b’day cake. So….I’m not totally opposed but would ideally cram both in.

        Love the risotto idea. I can sit around on a conference call and stir rice ;)

        • I just posted downthread about ice cream cake, but if he wants a regular cake and cake leftovers, this recipe is amazing:


          • Clementine :

            I can vouch that this cake is amazing. The restaurant that it originates from is not too far from me, and I have definitely gone hiking just so I could share a slice of this guilt free. It’s really spectacular at the restaurant. They frost it with Ganache at the restaurant which is easier for me to do than buttercream.

            ETA: If he’s got his heart set on a cake- what about pineapple upside down cake? I make that because it’s delicious and doesn’t need to be frosted.

          • Birthday help needed! :

            Awesome, this is perfect. And between that and risotto i’ll *have* to get some white wine and beer. Tragic.

            Maybe throw some fruit on there, or on the side, to break up the chocolate-on-chocolate?

          • I have made this cake and it’s my husband’s favorite. FYI – the recipe makes a TON of cake (3 huge layers). I have successfully cut it in half for a 2 reasonably-sized layer cake. I also saw someone (Smitten Kitchen, maybe?) adapt it to a bundt cake recipe with a chocolate glaze if that’s your style.

          • Anonymous :

            Why on earth would you pollute a perfectly lovely cake with fruit?!? Whyyyyyyyyyyy. It’s a celebration. Besides fruit and stout and chocolate isn’t even a good combo. What about scotch on the side? It cuts the richness of chocolate nicely.

          • Yes, this cut in half as a bundt cake with the ganache drizzle from smitten kitchen. It’s amazing. It has won over my non dessert fiend male friends.

            Or make the whole recipe and use the leftover batter for cupcakes. Which freeze well if you use the ganache and not frosting. And PS frozen chocolate cupcakes are still quite delicious, if you maybe have hardcore stress related chocolate cravings :)

          • oh my god that cake sounds amazing. I make the tastefully named “irish car bomb cupcakes” that involve Guinness in the cake and Bailey’s in the frosting and they are wonderful, I’ll try this one too.

          • Oh – I’ve seen the cupcake recipe that also includes a chocolate ganache in the center with whiskey :-)

        • Diana Barry :

          This is a fantastic cake


        • If you’re going to frost the cake, two hours really isn’t enough time, it won’t cool. I understand wanting leftovers, but isn’t there a nice bakery near you that might have a cake large enough for leftovers? I hear you on not enjoying grocery store cake, but a bakery cake tends to be much better than a grocery store cake.

          • Birthday help needed! :

            doesn’t have to be two straight hours. I can spent an hour making it and an hour frosting it later on today. I’m not THAT crazy!

          • Toss it in the freezer for a few minutes – works like a charm….

      • Clementine :

        Buy the cake. This is not a layer of stress you need in your life. Bonus points if you can pick up a retro favorite dessert- For some reason I keep thinking a ‘Fudgie the Whale’ ice cream cake.

        I say you take your two hours, get a couple nice steaks, some potatoes to bake and another veggie he likes (green beans/asparagus/green salad) with a nice beer or bottle of wine. Grill the meat or cook in a cast iron skillet and while the meat is resting, top with a pat of butter (salted) or bleu cheese and revel in your glory.

        As far as a gift- you’d know better than I would. Ideas though: a nice pair of leather gloves for winter, lacy/silky things for you, a gift certificate for an activity he would like, or (this was a big winner with mine) a wireless bluetooth speaker that he can stream music from his ipod/ipad wherever he is.

      • Ha, I’d do the oppos*te. I like baking and would get Fancy Take-Out for dinner – something chi-chi. Use fancy placemats and china, light some taper candles, voila! It’s a birthday dinner, at home, after Baby has gone to bed, of course.

    • Diana Barry :

      I would try to find a last-minute sitter and surprise him with dinner out, but that’s just me. :)

      • I can see this BUT he’s been traveling, so he’s been eating dinner out (alone?) for awhile now.

        • I totally get wanting to spend time at home, with a home-cooked meal. I’d say turn any cake recipe into a sheet cake, so that icing it won’t take as much time as a layer cake. And then it’s really hard to go wrong with a great seared and grilled steak, risotto, roasted broccoli, or (if you want to be more hands-off than risotto), I swear by roasted Yukon Gold potatoes tossed with salt, pepper, fresh rosemary, and a lot of olive oil.

    • Anywhere nearby to get an ice cream cake? Most of the quality ice cream shops around us make very good ice cream cakes and will have a few in stock in the freezer case. No effort and delicious – perfect!

    • If you’re set on making dessert rather than buying – why not try an apple crisp. All you have to do is slice the apples, stir the “crisp” mix up and plop it on top before baking. It also makes your house smell amazing and autumnal.

    • I love box cake (secretly I love box frosting too despite all the chemical nastiness, I think it tastes good). If box frosting isn’t your thing, I’d make a chocolate box cake in 2 rounds, whip up whipped cream and make a “naked layer cake”.
      For dinner, roasted chicken w salad – minimal prep time, most is in the oven. House will smell great and without a carby side, you’ll have room for dessert. If you’re feeling fancy and worried about having enough food, I’d start w a cheese and charcuterie plate – no cooking, just assembling.

      • This is actually a really great idea. You can even do a whole chicken in a (large) slow-cooker or crock-pot.

    • Anonymous :

      Cake from a box, homemade frosting. You have a toddler!

    • This is a modified box cake that tastes amazing and like you baked it from scratch, but takes 5 minutes to mix and toss in the oven.

      1 pkg. chocolate cake mix (I use devil’s food)
      1 (4 oz.) pkg. instant chocolate pudding mix
      1 (12 oz.) chocolate chips
      1 3/4 c. milk
      2 eggs, beaten
      1 tsp. vanilla extract

      Dump everything into a bowl, mix, bake for 35-40 minutes on 350.

      I serve with whipped cream – it doesn’t need frosting because it’s so rich and moist. Otherwise, you can glaze as follows:

      2 tbsp. cocoa
      1 tbsp. plus 2 tsp. water
      1 tbsp. oil
      1 tbsp. cornstarch (I 1 tbsp flour)
      1 c. sifted powdered sugar

      • I can vouch for this cake too; it tastes homemade with the melting chocolate chips in it, and I serve with just some confectioner’s sugar dusted over it and maybe vanilla ice cream on the side. Fabulous.

      • Senior Attorney :

        I do this cake recipe as a bundt cake and I love it because it doesn’t need frosting. I just sift some powdered sugar over the top and boom! Done! For a birthday I’d get some awesome ice cream to serve with it.

        ETA: Or… exactly what Michelle said. ;)

    • The Hershey’s chocolate cake and frosting is really good and easy. The recipe is usually on the box of powdered chocolate.

      • +1, I’ve made this many times.

        There’s also a super-easy chocolate cake with mayonnaise:


  3. anon-oh-no :

    i like the lower price option better, as i don’t like the asymmetrical thing going on with the tahari one. the tahari one without that keyhole detail would be great.

  4. Vote! OMG! :

    can you ladies please tell me if I’m being overly cranky/tired and should fold up my lawn chair and go inside? I’m feeling mildly annoyed/condescended to at the constant stream of “vote!” everywhere I turn today – particularly the facebook news feed full of people saying “vote! Here’s my sticker to prove I really voted! everybody should vote!” blah blah. Yes, I know I can scroll on by – but it’s pages’ worth. It’s not like this election is easy to miss…

    • Clementine :

      Eh, it’s better than a lot of things on FB. I always think ‘Who doesn’t vote???’ and then I realize that during presidential years, only about 60% of eligible voters turn out and in midterms (like this year) it’s only 40%!

      Decisions are made by those who show up. To me, the social media peer pressure is overall a good thing as it is creating a culture wherein voting is the norm (as I believe it should be). There are some days I just stay off FB and Pinterest it instead for my mindless internet fix. Maybe today is a Pinterest day for you?

      • Agreed – “remember to vote!” or “i voted!” or similar are the least egregious political posts on FB, in my opinion. And if it gets a few people who weren’t going to vote to get to the polls, then good!

        But I do wish we lived in a country where you couldn’t start campaigning until a few months before the elections. Because by the time election day rolls around, I’m always just SO DONE hearing about it.

      • As a poster of an I Voted! selfie, I like seeing proof that my friends are participating enthusiastically in the democratic process. But if it gets on your nerves, take a 24-hour break from Facebook and you’ll be fine.

    • Some call this Election Season, I call this Facebook Unfriend Season. :)

      It is what it is. While I certainly empathize, all you can do is remove those people (block, unfriend, scroll past, or whatever) from the stream you’re looking at. I’m a fairly large advocate of the idea that social media shouldn’t be a source of stress or angst – I have enough of that in real life, so there’s no room for that in virtual life. If someone is making me mad on social media (assuming it’s not a close friend or family member – and not just political-related opinions/posts.. it also goes for the FB oversharer, FB humble braggers, etc.), then they go away — simple as that. Trust me… it makes days like today easier to swallow!

    • Unfollow. Then vote!

    • Anonymous :

      Yeah that’s way too cranky.

    • It’s the emails from my party entitled “CRUSHING DEFEAT” and “BRUTAL LOSS” and “URGENT NEED” that are irritating the crap out of me. Talk about patronizing: “ANON- GIVE NOW! WILL YOU REACH DEEP AND HELP PROTECT YOUR FREEDOMS!?!??! I actually really like seeing people getting excited to vote and encouraging others to vote. It’s so important.

      Maybe today is a no-fb day for you. It’ll be over soon :)

    • I too am annoyed and posted something cheeky on FB like, if you don’t post about voting on social media, does it really count? However, I think the social peer pressure is good in this case. To us, the election seems obvious and hard to miss, but to many voting is not the norm.

    • I’m 35 and still remember when I was 18 and 1st year in college and a “friend” I hadn’t heard from in years but had collected email addresses sent a blast email to dozens, hundreds? of people reminding us to vote.

      Um, I’m an adult, I can read, I can make my choice. Thank you.

      Confession: There have been 2 elections since then that I have actively chosen not to vote in. DON’T TELL THAT “FRIEND” THAT – she has since become quite the political activist. :/

      I do like the Unfollow and Hide suggestions. No reason needs to be given.

      • Genuinely curious — what makes you actively choose to not vote?

        • Fair question.

          I had just moved to those areas and technically had time to register but didn’t want to deal with the hassle. Also one time I was pretty depressed (see: just moved) and just preferred to let my 17-year-old idealistic self (me) hate me for not voting in, like, a mid-term or off-year election in non-swing states where I felt like my vote wasn’t going to count anyway and I didn’t want to get educated on local issues.

          • CherryScary :

            I was in a similar position this year. I’ve just moved, and getting re-registered at my new address didn’t happen in time. I want to be well-informed, and couldn’t be at this point.

            Next spring though, registration is happening.

          • Get out there! :

            In my mind, “actively choosing not to vote” is when absolutely none of the candidates appeal to you, or you’re abstaining from the process because you find it somehow invalid. What you did sounds pretty passive- like you just didn’t get around to it.

    • You get a sticker? All we get in Chicago is a paper receipt. (I actually thought the stickers had been phased out nation-wide.) Where is this fancy, sticker-dispensing place? Strangely, and irrationally, I really miss them.

      • Blonde Lawyer :

        I got a sticker in the last presidential election but no sticker in today’s election. Weird statistical breakdown observation today. The A through middle of the alphabet line had maybe 6 or so people in it. The middle to Z line had 30+ people in it and a very long wait.

      • Pretty Primadonna :

        I’m in Florida. Despite our very dramatic elections, we still get “I Voted!” stickers, ha.

      • Georgia gives stickers in every election.

      • Senior Attorney :

        We get stickers in California. I love my stickers…

      • I got one today, but it came from/was funded by the league of women votes (who were on site handing them out)–not the town or state.

      • anon-oh-no :

        we get stickers in Chicago. maybe it depends on your polling place

      • I voted in Chicago and also didn’t get a sticker, just the receipt.

      • We vote by mail in Washington State, so no stickers. I’ve never voted in person, since I voted absentee when I was in college.

        I’d really like to get an I Voted sticker just once.

        • When I voted absentee in Texas, they included a sticker in the absentee packet. It was such a nice gesture!

          • Being permitted to vote at all in the state of Texas might be considered a “nice gesture” these days.

          • Lol Bankr

          • Anonymous :

            Gee, I think those are the types of comments that people find annoying. Take your political snark elsewhere.

          • +1 to Bankr atty. Anonymous, I wouldn’t call that political snark, but a legit comment on some pretty massive an important changes in this country’s jurisprudence regarding voting laws. Kind of a big deal, especially considering our country’s deplorable history with race (and gender and class) based voting restrictions, and she certainly doesn’t have to *take it else where*. Why so rude?

          • Anonymous :

            Because it was totally irrelevant to the lighthearted discussion on voting stickers. People were naming locations that gave them out, not saying “I’ve lived here, please give me every complaint you’ve got on the place!” I bet Bankr Atty is real fun at parties.

          • +1 to Bankr: Anonymous, one of the things I like about women attorneys and other educated ladies is their tendency to avoid sticking their head in the sand when it comes to politics. If that’s snark, snark on!

          • Anonymous :

            When you’re actually HAVING a political discussion, sure. But there’s a time and a place to have those discussions, and Bankr Atty’s comment was wholly without tact–it certainly does not reflect on her as a professional or educated woman. Does she also give unsolicited lectures on the evils of high fructose corn syrup to the coworker who she spies grabbing a soda out of the fridge, or on lung cancer to the one coming in from a smoke break? I hope someone leaps on her windshield every time she drives home, because she’s killing the environment, yo, and that’s a serious issue facing us all too.

          • Yes, because this conversation really only was ever about *stickers* (false) and that’s all anyone is allowed to talk about (also false). Eye roll. Quit with the thread-policing.

            Frankly, I’d rather talk to someone at a party who can say something snarky/witty but on-point (even if I disagree) at a party than someone who only wants to talk about *stickers*. This is from the woman who is super excited to wear her Georgia peach voter sticker today.

            Also, I vehemently disagree that her comment was “without tact” and reflects that she is neither negative nor professional. Wow! What a horrible and judgmental thing to say. Are you even aware of the issue she’s talking about? Her comment was downright mild! And why *isn’t* this an appropriate time or place for us to discuss politics? You are way out of line here. I get it, you’re butthurt cause someone called out Texas, but come on, treat her with respect.

            Plus, she was not calling out an individual’s behavior here, as in all of your examples, which are not analogous. She’s calling out a governmental policy. If that’s not ripe for public comment, nothing is.

            When did this place get so bitch-tastic?

          • Ah, yes, best to stick to our sticker discussions. Back in the kitchen, ladies!

          • Anonymous :

            Oh yeah, because that’s totally a logical leap from what I was saying. One of the things I like about women attorneys and other educated women is that we have the balls to say that when something walks and talks like a female dog, it probably is one. Except a lot uglier. Back to your plastic surgery and birth control glasses discussions.

          • I only party with people who enjoy my snark, actually. And I don’t own a car, so booya! I would launch into a lecture regarding the comparative sizes of our carbon foot prints but my professional educated self would rather watch reruns of The Good Wife.

      • sticker in MO

      • Gail the Goldfish :

        Sticker in NC. (Generic “I voted” on a flag. I rather miss the peach stickers in GA).

    • If the Ice Bucket Challenge got a bunch of people to donate to charity that otherwise wouldn’t have, I’m hopeful that a bunch of “I voted” or “Vote” facebook posts can socially pressure people to feel like they need to vote, too. Because let’s be real – the vast majority of people who don’t vote aren’t refraining from voting because they strongly believe that every single person in every position on the ballot is worthless, but rather because they feel like they have better things to do.

    • Vote! OMG! :

      all right, thanks all… I will attempt to get myself in a better mood. And stay off FB for the next few days.

      • My sympathies- social media can get annoying, but I think it would help spending a few moments enjoying that we CAN vote. It’s a big deal. People die for the freedom to vote. There are people alive today who were born when women couldn’t vote in the US.

        • +1

          Reading about what women went though to get the right to vote is sobering

          I’ve also been on a reading-about-North Korea kick recently, so maybe that’s why I’m feeling warm fuzzies today, despite the myriad problems in our political system.

    • Not too cranky at all. To steal some lines from one of my favorite podcasts:

      “Please don’t insult my intelligence by telling me it is important for me to vote in elections that will be won by margins of more than 25% in most instances (that is the reality of my state and county). Even a common core student can do that math! My state Senators, state House Reps, federal Reps and my governor and Lt. Governor are all predetermined, and I don’t want any of them, nor do I want their opponents running my state or representing me in DC.”

      “You are told your vote counts, it doesn’t, it won’t and it hasn’t in the lives of most adults. The winner in all these elections is the power elite, the loser is the people, this is the only constant. Voting for a third party won’t work, neither will voting for the lesser of two evils. Right now every voter is doing nothing but pissing into the wind and supporting one mafia, extortionist, traitorous, murderous family over the other.”

      “Those of you who want me to vote and tell me how important it is that I do so will have to do better that telling me that the “lesser of two evils” is the best we can do. You will have to point to at least one place in all the things above I have just listed where my vote will have any effect on even one of them. You see I don’t care which party takes which of my rights I simply care that both parties are constantly taking my rights day and night and that half the people cheer for one tyrant and half for the other.”

      Not my words, but expresses my sentiment exactly. Cynical, but true. Link to follow if you want to read the whole thing.

      • http://www.thesurvivalpodcast.com/why-i-wont-bother-to-vote-this-year

      • Wildkitten :

        Then run for office!

        • Would love to. While I have been invited to run for my city council in the next year or so, and I probably will, even if I win…I’m not going to make a difference. My city already has a really good city council, and we’re one of the few cities that didn’t go way into a deficit between 2008-2012. We actually run a balanced budget and have a really great town going here. I’m already really involved in my city, sitting on commissions and such.

          To run for a senate or house seat, I’d need to be independently wealthy, and I’m not. I’d love to, it is just not something I can afford!

          • I don’t think that’s necessarily true, depending on your state. With name recognition from a city council seat, you may be able to fundraise your way into a state rep or senate seat.

            Although if your city council was like mine, you’d be forever tainted with the “they’re either incompetent or corrupt” image of our city govt.

      • Even if you do live in a state that has wide margins, history shows that red states can become solid blue and vice versa. States that were once solid become swing states. Demographics, attitudes, generations, and parties change. The advent of the internet has made an informed electorate more possible than ever before.

        And anything with the word “survival” in it loses all credibility.

        • That particular podcast is one I listen to for the permaculture suggestions (gardening in a way that uses less chemicals and less artificial irrigation, basically). The guy runs 2 sustainable farms, and his ideas on sustainable agriculture are fantastic. The tag line for the podcast is “how to live a better life, if times get tough, or even if they don’t.” He actively makes fun of the “hardcore prepper” set that have this deep food storage in case the zombies come, but are walking around with loads of debt and no plan for retirement or serious illness.

          His entire platform is that we should be preparing for the PERSONAL disasters – layoff, death, something else horrible. Those happen all the time. He encourages his listeners to become debt free, make logical life decisions, and to have contingency plans for things that might very well happen in their lifetimes. What’s wrong with that?

          By discounting anything with the world “survival,” you are throwing away some things that might actually be valuable.

          • “He actively makes fun of the “hardcore prepper” set that have this deep food storage in case the zombies come, but are walking around with loads of debt and no plan for retirement or serious illness.”

            OMG this describes many people I know. I do not understand people who think it is imperative to have bug out bags stashed everywhere and month-long supplies of food, but don’t see the value of retirement savings.

          • “What’s wrong with that?”

            Absolutely nothing. Guess I shouldn’t judge a blog by it’s cover!

          • Yup! He is very different. I tread the line between both – working on becoming debt free, but I have about 3 months worth of food / water because my husband works on “mission critical” type stuff, so if we were to have a major natural disaster to which my area is prone, we’d have to stay and not go stay at a relative’s or get a hotel room. So it is there for that reason, since a good disaster could easily cut our supplies off for some time. But you have to prep for both the personal disaster and the external one…

      • Even if my vote won’t “count” (I’m not the majority party where I live), I feel like I don’t have a right to complain about who gets elected if I don’t even vote for the candidate that I actually wanted :)

      • It’s all about the propositions and local elections for me. I know how the state elections are going to go, but there are a number of local issues that are totally in play. You can be sure I will be voting!

      • Kensington :

        There’s a lot more to elections than the people running for major offices. I voted on a few state constitutional amendments this morning!

      • I grew up in a solidly red state that in the 2008 presidential campaign 1) despite having a very late primary ended up being a deciding factor in which candidate won a major party nomination and 2) ended up voting blue for the first time in living memory which, again, was one deciding factor in who won the election. That happened because people like me didn’t sit on our hands whining about how our vote would never count. Did my vote, on it’s own change the outcome of the election? No, but the votes of hundreds of people like me, each choosing individually not to let the fact that they lived in a solidly republican state stop them from voting, that did change the outcome of the election.

      • So if your area always has a 25% majority of those who vote, and only 40% of eligible voters turn up, that means if something like 17% of non voters turn up they can actually make a difference in your solid majority state

    • Statistically, fb vote notes matter :


    • Dunno, but I just “collapsed” all these voting comments! Haha

  5. I am anion house attorney and have just found out that a customer’s outside counsel (a partner in her firm) is going on maternity this week. I am in a specialized field of law where everyone knows everyone, and have been advised by my mentors that it in your best intrest to keep a smooth working relationship with all in our field. Would it be appropriate or advisable to email her and say congratulation or something like that? Do you even bother to congratulate before baby is due? Your advice is greatly needed!!

    • How well do you know her? If you’ve never met in person and rarely interact by email, I’d say nothing. If you’ve had professional interactions before, I’d say something like, “Best wishes for your upcoming maternity leave, looking forward to working with you again.”

      I don’t know about other cultures, but here in East Asia you wouldn’t say congrats before the baby is born.

    • (former) preg 3L :

      I like to say, “good luck with the delivery” and “congratulations in advance” — but I’ve never had it come up with coworkers. That’s just what I’ve said to friends. I like KLR’s suggestion of “best wishes for your leave!”

      • I would be really uncomfortable if someone wished me luck with the delivery. That’s very personal, and I don’t want to think about NEEDING “luck,” and I really don’t want a colleague even thinking of me in the act of delivering a baby. (I know you said you’ve said it just to friends, which I think is different.)

        • Wildkitten :

          +1 That’s creepy.

        • +1 Congratulate the birth, not the need to leave work early because pregnancy is requiring it (so I assume).

          ETA: if it’s a good friend, a simple good luck is entirely appropriate, but just for a close friend IMO

          • (former) preg 3L :

            Yeah, I only shared because it was a different response than had already been suggested. As I mentioned, I’ve only said it to good friends. Hopefully it’s not creepy – so far, it’s been well received, and I appreciated wishes of good luck before my daughter was born!

      • Maddie Ross :

        Agreed. I would definitely rather be wished “congratulations on your new addition” than anything about delivery. That was something I didn’t want to think about myself. And definitely didn’t want others to think about.

      • Question: If it’s bad to wish someone luck with her delivery, is it also bad to say (after the birth), “Congratulations! Hope you and baby are doing well”? Is it impolite to acknowledge the delivery at all? Just wondering so I don’t unintentionally offend someone.

        Personally I wouldn’t be offended at all if someone wished me good luck on my delivery. Giving birth is a medical procedure that everyone knows I’m about to go through. If I knew a colleague was going in for surgery, I would absolutely give him or her my best wishes for an uneventful procedure and speedy recovery. I guess I don’t really see why delivery is different, but this thread has been helpful in demonstrating that others might feel differently.

        • Spirograph :

          I think it’s always appropriate to say “I hope you and the baby are doing well!” I wouldn’t have a problem with a woman – especially a mom – wishing me good luck on the delivery, either. Not explicitly, but more like “I hope everything goes smoothly.” There is a big of a creepiness factor if a man says it, but not to the point I wouldn’t appreciate the thought.

          In the OP’s case, I think KLR’s advice above is spot on. If you get an update when the baby’s born, that’s when you e-mail with congratulations (and do not expect a response).

  6. Baconpancakes :

    I missed the Bags discussion yesterday, but wanted to follow up with a quick question – for those ladies who would describe themselves as hard on bags, do you find a difference in durability and quality moving from Buckets 3 to 4 or 5? I’ve found a definite difference in quality jumping from 1/2 to 3.

    I basically want to buy a couple basic bags that will last me at least a decade and then move on with my life (tan, black, cream, red, grey, done), but I regularly carry my lunch, an extra pair of shoes, and a couple heavy books and notepads on public transportation and I’m wondering whether I should just stick with the Bucket 3’s and just plan to replace them every 3-4 years.

    • anon-oh-no :

      My LVs hold up to everything. Literally everything. But Coach and Kate Spade are pretty good too. I think the only thing that makes me favor my LVs is that they actually look better with wear, not worse. And my everyday “weekend” one holds up to kids [email protected] Its almost 5 years old and still looks great.

    • Anonymous :

      In my experience, an Hermes Kelly lasts a lifetime because you treat it well, don’t overstuff it, keep it off the ground, and clean and condition regularly. I don’t think it’s realistic to expect any bag to last 10 years of hard use.

      • Baconpancakes :

        A Bucket 1 bag will only last a year of hard use, but the Bucket 3 I last bought still looks nearly new going into year two, so I was mostly wondering about the jump in quality of leather and construction, if there was any.

        • I have no personal experience here, but is it possible the nicer bags would actually be more delicate than the mid range ones?

          • Not generally, I don’t think. I can think of some exceptions, such as if you bought a super high-end designer bag that is made of some exotic animal material or has lots of embellishments that require special care. But if we’re just talking about leather bags, nicer bags tend to have better construction and better quality materials that make them hold up longer.

      • anon-oh-no :

        LV will.

      • What does everyone use for leather conditioning/cleaning? I’ve never really treated any of my leather with anything, other than cleaning up scuffs on my boots with black shoe polish, but then I haven’t owned much leather until recently.

        • Anonymous :

          There is a brand called “Apple” (obviously not the electronics Apple) that makes leather conditioning and cleaning products that are very highly recommended by my friends with high end leather goods. You can probably find it in local shoe repair places, but I just ordered online from a place called ‘leatherstuff dot com’ or something similar to that. It was really expensive on Amazon.

    • I wondered the same thing.

    • I’ve used variations on the LV canvas (the Neverfull) as my everyday bag for the last several years. I am a SERIOUS purse abuser, and these have held up very well. I am impressed that those straps can carry around such heavy items and show no sign of tearing or wear.

    • I posted yesterday and mentioned that my Chloe bag has held up through 7 years of daily use. Still looks great, and I carry a lot of stuff and am not particularly careful where I put it.

      • Baconpancakes :

        Which bag do you have? The famous trapezoid shape looks great but is a bit small.

  7. Sweater report :

    I ordered the Neiman Marcus sweater featured on 10/28 in berry. The pictures were so pretty and I was envisioning it for work with my grey sheath or brown sheath dresses.

    Big disappointment. Color was pretty but to me, the “open weave” back and sleeves looked more like a crochet blanket my aunt would make me. And the clasp at the front did not look high quality –at least for the price, which was more than I should be spending on a sweater in the first place!

    Back it goes.

    • That is sad. I definitely bookmarked that sweater on my wishlist waiting for future sales. Oh well… off to dream about other expensive sweaters now!

  8. Career advice please! Anyone have experience going from independent consulting to a full-time role?
    I’ve been working for myself for the last five years. Before that, I worked for a company but as the only in-country employee. When not on site, I work from home or from a shared office space. So, while I have a fair bit of experience I’ve never actually had a job that required going to an office and working there all day.

    I’ve got a job offer for a full-time role in my field that looks awesome (good salary & benefits, challenging role). But it would require me to show up every morning looking professional, and stay there all day. I know this might sound silly, but I really value my mobility and freedom (and ability to put on comfy pants whenever I want…) and am not sure I want to give up my autonomy. I make enough money on my own, so there’s less of a financial incentive to take the job. But on the other hand, it’s a great company with growth potential, and honestly I think I’ve reached the limit to what I can do on my own. I need to re-join an organization to improve my skills and really move forward in my industry, and it might as well be this one.

    So, autonomy versus career progression. Advice? Anyone faced a similar decision?

    • How long have you been in the workforce? Are you in the early stages of thinking of settling down/starting a family? If so…the flexibility can’t be beat. I work remotely/from home and man…it’s nice. I eased into this role from a “come into the office 8-6” role at a previous company, then “come into the office 9-5 and work from home after” role with my current employer. It got to the point where I wasn’t working with anyone in the office anymore, so cut out my commute time and worked from home.

      If you have a good independent thing going, what’s the risk of taking the job? If it doesn’t work out, would it be hard to start back up with the independent thing, with an added line item of experience to the resume.

      This may also depend a bit on what kind of work you do. For example, if you are more in the true “consulting” role (come in for a few months, give advice, leave. Or come in, give advice, stay for the early stages, then exit), that’s a lot different than a full time role where you have year/multiyear objectives and a full team to manage. On balance, if you are more of a “contractor” role (companies can hire you out, use your services, then term with you at the end of the project), then this may be an easier transition.

      Finally…other expenses. Consider the investment you’d need in a professional work wardrobe, commuting expenses (and commuting TIME- what a pain!), lunches out, etc. and really weigh that against the increase in salary/benefits.

    • You can learn a ton by working face-to-face with smart people every day in an innovative environment — seeing how they communicate, handle problems, navigate conflict, etc. Being in an office exposes you to a lot that can help you develop professionally. If those things don’t interest you as much as working at home, fair enough. But I think there’s something to be said for being in an office for at least some part of your career.

  9. Under eye cream for men? :

    Posted at request of DH: anyone have a good, not too expensive, eye cream that helps de-puff and tighten the skin under the eye? Dark circles and wrinkles are so much the issues, more puffy sagginess, I think. DH doesn’t need any “manly” products and probably won’t even care if it comes in a pink and purple bottle. I happen to like the ROC Retinol Correction stuff. What else is out there on the drugstore shelves that works?

    • My DH likes the Kiehl’s products for men — the line is called Facial Fuel. He doesn’t use the eye cream, but I know that they do have an eye cream.

    • Preparation H. Seriously.

      • Be careful. If you are using preparation H with steroids (hydrocortisone) in the cream, this will thin and break down your skin over time. Never ever use steroids chronically for a chronic skin issue. See your derm.

        But to have Preparation H in your back pocket for one time/emergency situations. No problem.

    • lucy stone :

      I like the Clinique All About Eyes. I usually use the regular, but will use the rich if it’s been a rough week. I also have the serum depuffing massage thing that I put on several times a day if my eyes feel puffy.

    • Teaspoons in the fridge! As I am brushing my teeth I will put the convex/bottom under my eye (i.e. I do not cup the eyeball with the concave side) and it feels great. I also massage my face as I wash it and then end with a cold splash to get the blood flowing. A cooling gel-based eye cream would work well for day (Kiehl’s facial fuel one with caffeine, the Boots No. 7 one, etc.), a good moisturizing one for night as well as drinking a lot of water, reducing salt intake, and trying to sleep on one’s back will all help reduce the swelling. Also, my eyes become very puffy with allergies, so it may be worth checking into those causes.

    • Origins GinZing was recommended to me and it’s awesome, and not girly-looking. It’s great.

  10. People's Republic :

    Anyone know when Sephora’s F&F sale is? Must be coming up sometime in Nov/Dec, no?

    • I got a coupon last week for 20% off, running from Nov 6-10th. It’s for people with VIB and VIB Rouge status only though–I think this may be replacing the 20% off for all that they used to do :/

    • anon a mouse :

      The mailer I got says it starts later this week – either Nov. 6 or 7. What are you buying?

      • People's Republic :

        I was thinking about a Clarisonic and also Benefit’s Gimme Brow (I’ve heard good things and recent;y noticed that my eyebrows are following the rest of my hair and going gray! so early! sigh!).

  11. Does Restoration Hardware do promo codes? I’ve never ordered from them before, wanted to get some holiday decor items but they’re pricey!

    • I’ve received coupon cards in the past when they send out that massive brick of a catalog in the early spring/summer. Not this year though.

  12. scarves... :

    I’m looking for a basic cobalt blue scarf for winter. This color is harder to find. Any recs? Cannot have wool (too itchy), so needs to be synthetic or possibly cashmere (but I’d rather not pay a fortune) or other natural fibers.

    Several come up on etsy (which I am less familiar with) but they seem to inexpensive and I wonder about quality.

    Any recs?

    • Pantl-A-Loon :



      http://www.zappos.com/michael-michael-kors-pin-dot-logo-stud-shocking-pink?si2917881=&channel=194&mr:referralID=97096848-6441-11e4-8d82-001b2166becc (the logo is really ugly)

      http://www.scoopnyc.com/cashmere-modal-scarf.html?source=pepperjam&publisherId=20648&clickId=1081759246 not sure about the color, it’s called denim but looks cobalt on my screen

      http://www.shopbop.com/tassel-linen-scarf-love-quotes/vp/v=1/1589355276.htm?folderID=2534374302024641&colorId=24494&extid=affprg_CJ_SB_US-1909792-ShopStyle.com-2178999 Belle at CapHillStyle is always recommending this brand, this one is linen, so not really wintery

      http://www1.bloomingdales.com/shop/product/aqua-chunky-solid-fringe-scarf-bloomingdales-exclusive?ID=1107729&PartnerID=LINKSHARE&cm_mmc=LINKSHARE-_-n-_-n-_-n&LinkshareID=J84DHJLQkR4-NkugkYEvpWuQdh1fKlVE2A again, not sure on the color, it might be too dusky

      • Oooh, that Bloomindales one looks so comfy and for the OP– looks cobalt to me.

    • I like the cheap pashminas they have at Charming Charlies. They have a billion colors and I know cobalt is one of them because I was just there yesterday. They are super soft and not at all irritating.

    • I had a wool blend scarf from Gap (so probably not much wool) that was incredibly warm and soft. It depends on your climate, but in my cold winters I might as well not even bother if I wear a synthetic scarf.

    • If you are in the Bay Area, the Gift Center in SF has a number of pashmina stores that have lots of colors and are reasonably priced.

  13. Valentine's Day weekend advice, please! :

    DH and I want to do a 3-4 day Valentine’s Day getaway, no more than a 3 hour flight from DC, and preferably in the Southeast (i.e., no further north or colder than DC)! Neither of us has been farther south than Virginia, save one trip to Florida, and so we’d like to go somewhere quintessentially southern. Good food, decent art scene, lots of history, nearby hikes all a plus.

    Originally we were thinking New Orleans, but prices are expensive. Thoughts so far…Charlotte, NC; Savannah, GA; Nashville, TN; Charleston, SC. I’d appreciate any help in choosing between these options, or new recommendations. Thanks!

    • Savannah checks all of those boxes, except mountain hikes. But if you like the beach and federal battlefield parks or marsh hikes (Skidaway), then hiking is in there too. The historic downtown with all of the trees and squares is beautiful and very walkable so there is that.

    • Maddie Ross :

      Have you considered Chattanooga, TN? It’s a little harder to get to than some of the other places you name, but there is a burgeoning art scene downtown (a good art museum and a couple of galleries up on the bluff above the river and a few others over in the St. Elmo area) and great hiking not to far outside of town. Food maybe isn’t as tremendous as say Charleston, but there are some cute places popping up.

      • I love Chattanooga! You have the mountains and river.

        I grew up in Savannah and I love bringing people to visit. Explore the squares, pop in shops, enjoy the open container policy.

    • I’ve been to Charlotte, Savannah, and Nashville, and would recommend Savannah of the three of those. However, Charleston is high on my wish list.

    • A Nonny Moose :

      That is a perfect amount of time for Charleston. DH and I went recently and had an incredible time. Highly recommend. The whole city was absolutely gorgeous. Tons of art galleries, amazing food (if you’re into southern food, anyway– they might have decent other cuisines, but most of the top-rated places were southern), and very walkable if you stay in a central location (which will add to your hotel bill significantly, fwiw). If you rent a car, you’re 2 hours from a national park (Congaree) for hiking, or you could drive to the beaches. The Angel Oak tree is cool and worth the short drive from downtown. I don’t have much experience with any of the other options you listed, though, so I can’t compare to those.

    • Ashville, NC, but it might be cold over valentines day since it’s in the mountains. I hear Savannah is wonderful and people love Nashville.

      • I’d save Asheville for warmer months. The Blue Ridge Parkway will be closed (or stretches of it, at least) and it could be COLD.

    • Charleston or Savannah would be great. Beautiful places to walk around, lots of history and great food, gorgeous waterfront, can go walk on the beaches nearby if you like.

      Not Charlotte, it’s just not in the same league in terms of things to do and certainly not many places to walk around. Can’t comment on Nashville.

      • We did charleston savannah and Asheville in September. Savannah would be my pick. Asheville is fun and charleston is beautiful but savannah feels like another world. We had great food in all three cities.

      • +1. Savannah, then Charleston. Charlotte doesn’t even compare.

    • I live in Nashville – it’s a great place to visit/live, and we do have many state parks around with good hiking within an hour drive or so. BUT February is still going to be very cold, with predictions that it will be as bad as last year (regularly in the single digits), which would make me not want to be outdoors that much. If you did end up in Middle TN, I’d consider checking out the Inn at Evins Mill for at least one night (hour-ish drive from Nashville, maybe a little less from the airport). It has trails onsite, dinner/breakfast/lunch included in your room rate and is small enough to be super relaxing and quiet.

      I’d vote for Charleston. It’s the off-season, so there are great deals on rooms/condos, and the city won’t be too crowded. The restaurants are all still going to be open and delicious, and walking on the beach in the winter with a big cup of coffee is lovely and relaxing.

    • I’d add Asheville, NC to your list. It’s wonderful, there’s tons to do and amazing food.

    • I’m a Nashville native, and unfortunately, in February the weather can be pretty gross. But if you don’t mind renting a car and driving around, and you stay somewhere around Downtown or West End (near Vandy Campus), you can definitely do all the touristy stuff (Opryland, the Loveless Cafe, Station Inn or the Bluebird or Wildhorse Saloon, lots and lots of good southern barbecue) in 3-4 days, and it’s certainly worth a visit. There’s definitely good food; there’s usually fun art at the Frist Museum and Cheekwood, and there are TONS of hiking areas in the area such as Percy Warner Park, Radnor Lake, and Edwin Warner Park/the Natchez Trace area.

      Honestly, however, if you want somewhere “quintessentially Southern” I’d say Nashville isn’t it. It’s pretty Metropolitan as southern cities go; I’d say Savannah, Memphis, Chattanooga (or the Gatlinburg area, which is near Dollywood) have a much more “South” feel to them. One thing I might do is check out the Nashville Scene (you can google it) closer to February (depending on soon you need to book); it’s got lots of info on what music/art/theater/museum stuff is happening around the city and if something looks interesting, then you can go knowing there will be stuff for you to do.

    • Gail the Goldfish :

      Charleston or Savannah. I agree with adding Asheville if you want mountain hikes, and don’t go to Charlotte. Charlotte is a perfectly fine city, but it’s nothing exciting, not really walkable or touristy, and not really a quintessential southern town if that’s what you want.

    • adding machine :

      New Orleans is expensive that weekend because the Tuesday following Valentine’s is Mardi Gras.

      • Valentine's Day weekend advice, please! :

        Ahhh, I did not put 2 and 2 together here, obviously :)

    • Valentine's Day weekend advice, please! :

      OP here. Thanks all, this has been very helpful. I think I’ve narrowed it to Charleston or Savannah, with Savannah having the slight edge. And Asheville is on the list (although maybe I’ll try to take a trip in the fall and do the Smoky Mountains as well…). Getting excited! On that note, any Savannah recommendations? I’m looking through the NY Times “36 hours” on Savannah now…

      • fingers crossed, it looks like the search function on this page is working better now. Savannah has been discussed in the past couple of years with some restaurant and activity recommendations. If you search my name and savannah, threads should pop up. Here’s a start http://corporette.com/2014/06/20/weekend-open-thread-232/

      • Savannah Bee Company

      • Min Donner :

        Adorable local handbag/leather goods maker: http://shopsatchel.squarespace.com
        Great quality and they’ll do custom orders and ship, so you can pick your own leather and lining.

      • N.C. anon :

        I stayed at the Bohemian Hotel (a Marriott Signature hotel) with some girlfriends for a long weekend. The location was nice as it was on the river and much of the historic district was in walking distance. We did a carriage ride ghost tour that left from our hotel that was cheesy but fun. Downside is there is a club on the roof that can be a little loud if your room is on an upper floor. Don’t remember much about the restaurants except eating a lot of crab cakes and crawfish!

      • Sweet knee :

        Be careful you don’t run into the wildlife/ducks unlimited festival that is in charleston, usually February. Hotels are hard to come by then.

  14. How do you all fix the sleeve lining on jackets so it doesn’t pop out on the edge?

    • Aside from yourself or a tailor cutting the lining, shortening it, and reattaching it? I pinch the lining to the shoulder of the jacket when I put it on, which helps it not get dragged down by the sleeve of your shirt, which is IMHO what makes the lining pop out.

      • Unless the sleeve is super-tight, you can kind of make a pleat with the excess lining fabric and secure it with tiny safety pins. No one is going to see, even if you remove the jacket.

    • Small pieces of fashion tape. Make a tiny pleat out of the excess fabric, and secure with fashion tape.

  15. Yes Nov 6-10th.

  16. I’m from Charlotte and it’s lovely, but I’d go to Charleston or Savannah for a getaway. Charlotte’s a great city to live in, but not really a tourist destination.

    This was for Valentine’s Day weekend advice, obvs!

    • Charlottean :

      Ha, in Charlotte we say “It’s a nice place to live, but I wouldn’t want to visit!”

  17. (former) preg 3L :

    No comments on this dress yet? I think it’s gorgeous! Out of curiosity – would you wear black tights, sheer black nylons, hose, or bare legs (or something else?) with it? The sleeves make it look like a wintry dress.

    • I love it, too! I’d wear black tights or nylons but not bare legs, at least this time of year. I also don’t have a problem with sheer black nylons/hose, but I know some people won’t wear anything but tights.

    • I love the dress and almost everything Elie Tahari. I’d wear black tights and black patent mary janes.

    • Lovely!

  18. Speaking of Southern Destination Cities :

    Any advice on Savannah vs. Charleston for a weekend girls getaway – best friend’s 30th birthday in late Feb or early march?

    • Freaking love Savannah, which has the added bonus that there are no open container laws :)

      • Gail the Goldfish :

        Yep. And alcohol is allowed on pretty much all of the beaches in Georgia-just no glass containers. I didn’t realize this was unusual until I brought my BF for vacation; he was confused as to why I was packing alcohol for the day at the beach and I was confused as to why he wasn’t.

    • oil in houston :

      I prefer Charleston, more bars and great restaurants

  19. Slip help needed -- stat! :

    This is the curse of unlined dresses: trying to figure out slips so you can wear them with tights now that it’s cold.

    My slips seem to be too long (showing if I move around) if they are within an inch of the dress hem. Today’s slip is too short and the dress is grabbing my tights for the 4 inches that the slip doesn’t cover. Don’t get me started on kick pleats.

    How many slips do I need to own? Is there some standard slip / hem length ratio where everything works out? HELP!!!

    • anon a mouse :

      Many years ago, my grandmother gave me 8 slips of all different lengths. She apparently thought I needed them to be a proper lady. I said thanks but thought it was a strange gift… but I have been so glad to have them.

      So, no real advice, except maybe wait for a sale at Macy’s or somewhere and stock up.

    • Mrs. Jones :

      I don’t wear slips very often anymore. I figure everyone knows I have legs. So it’s not the end of the world if people see my legs through my skirt, as long as they’re not seeing anything else through my skirt.

      • Slip help needed -- stat! :


        This is more for the cling factor of fabric against tights. I’m all about showing leg, but now my legs are cold.

        • If Static Guard doesn’t do the trick, try rubbing a small amount of liquid soap or lotion on your hands, then rub your hands against your tights.

    • Anonymous :

      I like gap slips – I am barely 5’4 but they seem to be short enough that they don’t peek through but long enough that they don’t ride up.

  20. I seem to always have dandruff despite using oil on my hair weekly and using head and shoulders. any advice?

    • Maybe try more moisturizing shampoo/conditioner on your scalp? I know traditional dandruff shampoo can dry out skin and if your dandruff is caused by dry skin it may be making it worse. If you can’t solve it on your own, a dermatologist might be able to help.

      • Dandruff (seborrheic dermatitis) is actually caused by too much oil in the scalp.

        • I know, but some people mistake dry scalp flakes for dandruff. I should have been more clear.

    • My scalp has been really flaky with the colder weather. Google tells me that its dry scalp (fine white flakes that come off easily) and not dandruff (bigger, stickier). I tried an apple cider vinegar treatment this morning. 1/4 c. ACV mixed with 3/4 c. warm water. Wash hair, pour onto wet hair and rub into scalp, wait 5 minutes, then rinse well and apply conditioner. Noticeable improvement with my scalp today after doing this. It may take some adjustment to amounts and time to leave on, but this seems to work.

      • Anonymous :

        Hm.. okay then by your description I think I have dry scalp.

        • Rachelellen :

          Have you tried just washing with conditioner? I do it maybe twice a week. Some people never use shampoo. People have mixed responses but it helps get rid of over drying, for sure.

    • My derm recommended a prescription cream, which I didn’t end up ever using. She also recommended using Head & Shoulders, but with a twist. She suggested putting it onto your dry scalp and letting it sit for half an hour, and then washing your hair out in the shower. That has worked well for me.

    • You may be causing dandruff by using oil on your hair. Try the Clear line of shampoos–the one Heidi Klum promotes–it’s cheap and works really well, and the bonus is that it moisturizes hair while still cleaning.

    • Do you brush your scalp vigorously before washing? This usually clears out my dry-scalp flakiness issues.

  21. Hello ladies! Wanted to drop by and let you know that we will be having another DTLA ‘rette meetup, this time on the West Side! We are meeting for brunch this Sunday, November 9th at 10am at 26 Beach in Marina del Rey. If you can be there, let me know at dtlarette at g mail dot com! I have reservations for 10 so far.

    (Personal update: my in-house job is still wonderful, we sold our tiny house for a profit instead of bending over backward to try and get construction financing, we’re renting a beautiful townhouse that is 1600 square feet which is a huge upgrade from the 748 square feet we were in, and we’re paying down debt and saving for a bigger house. Also selling my jumper Polly (the horse) which I’m bummed about, but the money I’ll save in board/vet/farrier will go a long way toward that downpayment on the nice house we’re looking for. I can always come back to it later, and have lots of friends that will let me ride for free! That’s all from here…)

    • Mary Ann Singleton :

      I always appreciate a horse update from other equestrian ‘r e t t e s. I should sell my horse too as he’s 15 this year, but he’s way too much fun right now so I just can’t bring myself to do it. I do sometimes think about how much I would save each month if I didn’t have all his expenses, but then the mental health benefits of getting to ride every day outweigh those concerns. (Now if I had friends with horses I could ride I would probably reconsider.)

      • SoCalAtty :

        Yep, that’s the only reason I’m ok with it! Polly is only 7, and unfortunately after her causing bursitis in her front feet from being a mare and kicking her stall down, I had to nerve her front feet. It went perfectly, they only did the heel, and she is jumping around happily again, but of course her value took a 50% hit! So someone is getting a NICE hunter/jumper for cheap. Huge bummer, wish I could just keep her forever, but we are thinking about starting a family (SCARY) and if I want a 4 bedroom house where I live, they range from $800k on up to $1.1m and beyond…not doable with horsey expenses :(

        So cool you are having fun with your guy! My retired hunter, Max, will be 23 in January. He is retired, but happy living out in a field in Solvang, so I’m happy for him. I bought him when he was 14, and had SO much fun with him…they just know what they are doing at that age.

    • Senior Attorney :

      You guys, if you are thinking about coming, just come. It’s so much fun to meet up with Corpore*t*t*e*s in person!

    • Ten! should be a fun hangout! Looking forward to seeing you all.

  22. Paging Work - suicidal thoughts? :

    Thinking of you today! Hope everything is going well and you are continuing to take care of yourself.

  23. I’ve been bad about organizing a DC meetup. By email I had suggested 11/5 for happy hour and 11/16 for brunch but only got a few yays. Any interest? Email me at dccorpore**e at yahoo dot com (replace * with t)

  24. Cool thread function Kat!

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