ByElizabeth Hours Updated
Comments 474 Comments

Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Essential Silk Top

black shirt

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

The items in my closet that I reach for the most often aren’t always the most exciting ones, but I do get a little rush when I find a piece that I know will be a workhorse for seasons to come.

This silk blouse from Banana Republic is right up my alley. I know it will layer nicely under blazers and sweaters with a variety of necklines and it’s machine washable. It also comes in tall (and petite) sizes, which I appreciate as a long-torsoed gal.

I’ll be wearing this one on repeat all winter long.

The top is on sale for $95 (marked down from $120) — plus an extra 40% off at checkout — at Banana Republic and comes in sizes XXS-XXL, ST-XLT, and XXSP-LP.

As of 2024, some of our favorite silky silk T-shirts include Quince, Cuyana, M.M.LaFleur, Amour Vert, Banana Republic, and Reiss. This Banana Republic Factory top is only polyester, but readers have been loving it!

Sales of note for 12.5

474 Comments

    5. So it would’ve only been ok to come here and celebrate if your candidate won? Because I am quite certain that would’ve happened.

      Honestly I do feel bad for dems. I have been a lifelong dem and have watched the party twist and contort itself to the left and I’ve had enough.

      I held my nose and voted. I think that’s hard for anyone here to believe but that voting numbers prove it’s true. I live in a blue state so it mattered little.

      I hope that the dems can surge back to the center where many people (myself included) want them.

      2. I feel like Biden/Harris are pretty centrist though? What issues exactly do you want them to move right on?
        Some pretty left wing ballot initiatives passed. Deep red Missouri voted to increase minimum wage to $15, which is an issue I would have voted “no” on as a moderate Dem. Hard to see how that squares with the Democratic Party being too far left.

        IMO, it was sexism, racism, the economy/lack of understanding that Trump’s policy won’t help the economy, and misinformation online, which also ties into the economy point.

        1. Excess regulation, excess government spending, crazy amount of money going into green initiatives. I’m in CA and own an electric car bc we got a good deal on it and charge it for free. CA has a law on the books to ban gas cars and gas appliances by 2035 but now as an electric car owner I can see how this is completely and totally untenable for the majority of the population.

          2. “you can see” oh wow I didn’t know we had experts in transportation policy development here.

          3. Yes. I can see. I used to lived in a multigenerational household until I made my own money. I also have many relatives that live in multigenerational homes and apartment buildings. I can see how impractical it is for my cushy life in an SFR. I never take it below 30% battery bc of my own range anxiety and I have a second gas cars So yes, I definitely can see how impractical and onerous it will be for the working class Californian.

            Also if you lived in CA you’d know how truly astronomical energy prices are here.

        2. The Democratic coalition is a lot whiter than it was before, and the Republican coalition is the most diverse in decades.

          Counties that haven’t gone red since the 19th century flipped red.

          But that’s because of racism???

          You people are the very reason that Donald Trump is returning to DC on a wave of support.

          1. He literally green lit people who speeches called Americans of color garbage. If that doesn’t read as racism to you, guess what, you’re a racist.

          2. I think racism cancels out for a lot of people who have encountered plenty of it on both sides of the aisle.

          3. Yes, broadly speaking, Latinos in the United States right now are like ethnic Italians in the United States in the midcentury — they seek to “become white” in contrast to immigrants from the old country, we are not like them, don’t call us POCs! It’s a familiar phenomenon, pulling the ladder up behind me, as “I’ve got mine.” Plus, white women favor white supremacy, and view themselves as privileged from the dire consequences of a diminishment in health care for women. Good luck having a safe pregnancy in Florida or Idaho anymore. It’s back to the middle-ages, with lots of death in childbirth and so forth. Similar to gun violence — we seem to be fine with child sacrifice as the price for MOAR GUNZ. Plus men. The white supremacy caste system is firmly embedded in American society, always has been. Sigh.

      3. Dems have moved wayyy to the right on immigration, labor, and foreign policy in the last several decades. This election, they courted the architects of the Iraq war and laughed off calls from the left to curtail arms sales to a rogue state. What world are you living in?

        1. Biden won as a centrist. The progressives blew up out of the gate. What world are you living in?

      4. The current Dem position is what history would consider centrist. Even the mainstream GOP is very far to the right. The US does not have a major party that truly represents the left.

    6. With both an EC and a smashing popular vote victory, and one of the most diverse GOP coalitions in decades, I’m glad we can finally say that here!

      It was a long, long night at the polls, being part of the team. The joy will set in later. We did it!

          1. Actually, I agree. As someone who has suffered multiple miscarriages, some requiring emergency D&Cs to stop hemorrhaging, I full-heartedly agree with the above take. Those who support anti-choice should be the ones who feel the bloody and heartrending consequences of their actions. Not the rest of us.

          2. I’m in the same boat, and you do not speak for me. No one — absolutely no one — should have to go through pregnancy loss, and it is almost psychopathic to wish that pain on other women.

          3. Not remotely as psychopathic as ensuring anyone who goes through pregnancy loss is unable to obtain life-saving measures.

        3. This is not ok, Anonymous @ 10:25. I’m a lifelong Democrat who campaigned for Kamala, but stooping to that low is not who we are.

        2. Well, the American people who voted. I assume it is a minority of the population of eligible voters. But yes, silence = consent here, even if inadvertent. Sigh.

      3. Come back after your party guts your rights as a woman. We are one senatorial body away from taking away your right to open a bank account without a man’s consent.

          1. It has been a conservative dream for many years to convene a constitutional convention and get rid of some of those annoying amendments. Go read your state laws and make sure they protect you. If not, you know what to target next.

      5. I’m liberal, very horrified by what’s happening in states re women’s healthcare and bodily autonomy, and not happy this morning with the results. But I wholeheartedly don’t agree with wishing pain, harm, and death on those who don’t agree with me and really think those comments are out of line. We can be very upset without being monsters towards each other.

        1. There wouldn’t be pain, harm or death if it weren’t for their own policies. I’m not going to take the high road, I will rejoice when the leopards eat their face.

          2. “Joy and Unity”

            Dude that is so over for many of us. We are going to take our cue from the winners. You go low, we go lower. Hope you like how it feels to be on the receiving end of it for a change.

  2. It wasn’t even really all that close, and he got the popular vote too. At least abortion did fairly well on ballot measures, but overall, a grim future. Yikes and also sigh…

        1. Yup. And also a lot of women hate women. I’m pretty sure this is an actual Selina Meyer (Veep) quote.

        2. Literally what I said to my husband this morning. (I turned my phone off last night, and refused to look at results til I woke up)

      2. He was beaten by an okay man and won over two very qualified women. I know that there are other factors, but this one seems so obvious. And sad.

        1. And they ran ads calling her a c*nt and made jokes about her giving BJs to get to the top. Obviously it’s sexism.

      3. This is what I said from the beginning. The men in this country will not elect/allow a women president.

        1. I wasn’t of voting age when Sarah Palin was a candidate, so I can complain all I want.

        2. That’s a leap. But it’s nice to see that stupid women will always back stupid women.

        3. I voted Democrat for president for the first time when Sarah Palin was on the ticket. I don’t think she was treated fairly by the media, but her interviews and debate were just awful. I respect the heck out of John McCain and probably would have voted for him if his running mate had any other arrow in her quiver than her intro speech (which I remember watching with my very Republican dad, and being excited for her selection!), but I ultimately came to believe that picking her for VP showed poor judgement. And the populist movement Palin fanned the flames of led straight to Trump.

      5. That’s basically it for me. And now they will never run a woman again. People hate us, y’all.

    5. I am horrified and irate that so many millions of people are driven by hatred and ignorance.

      1. Perhaps get of your high horse of contempt! Millions of people voted that way because their grocery bills were too high and they associated that with the current administration. It was not hatred

        1. It was hatred. Anyone with an IQ above a cereal box understands that grocery prices won’t magically drop under a fellon administration

          1. People will see relief soon, because inflation is already very low. I don’t understand how so many people can’t grasp that you inherit the previous admin’s economy, ie Trump 1.0 inherited Obama’s strong economy, Biden inherited Trump’s mess, Trump 2.0 will inherit Biden’s improving economy, etc.
            But people are incredibly stupid.

          2. I’m deep left and do not think this framing of what happened or the population that voted against my interests is at all helpful (or accurate). I wish we’d stop doing contempt as a strategy.

          3. People are not going to see relief soon- that’s part of the reason this is so frustrating. Just because inflation is low does NOT mean prices are going to go down, just that prices are going to go up less fast. We’d need a period of deflation which is also rough on an economy overall. Tariffs will drive prices up, not down.

            I don’t think people’s decisions are driven by hatred. They’re upset at their lives & want something better. They chose to go with a liar who lied to them about what he could do to make things better (and he’s a very convincing liar).

          4. I understand that low inflation is not the same as deflation. But stores are finally admitting to price gouging and cutting prices. No reason to think that won’t continue. Prices at Target are already noticeably cheaper than a few months ago.

          5. +1 to 9:12. Some people voted out of hatred and isms for sure. Other people are naive. Other people had productive reasons that didn’t align with our/seem impossible to understand. Now we all have to boil in this pot and I just hope he gets the blame (Id love to not boil at all, of course! That’s my first hope)

          3. I’m sorry but calling half the country stupid and ignorant is not how you come back from this. Look in the mirror first.

          4. Honestly, this is what is wrong with the Democratic party at the moment. Over half the country voted for Trump. I am sure some are stupid or full of hate, but the vast, vast majority are not. They just did not believe that Harris is a better option for this country. Trump increased his numbers with minorities while running against a minority candidate. He increased his numbers in red states. He increased his numbers in blue states – even NY moved 13 points toward him compared to 2020. It is time to stop saying that anyone who voted for him is dumb and racist and full of hate.

          5. My sister-in-law who claims to be a Christian is both full of hate and completely stupid. She represents the typical Trump voter to me. And there is no way in hell she was going to vote for a black lady. All I heard from her about Harris was that she didn’t like how she laughed. And she’s in a swing state. I wash my hands.

          6. 10:42, just because there are a lot of people with this view does not mean they are not hateful or ignorant. I stand by my statement.

        3. It was a combination of hatred and stupidity. Trump’s tariffs aren’t going to reduce the cost of goods here, they are inflationary.

          1. I don’t think he will actually do the tariffs. The good thing about Trump is he’s too dumb and lazy to do most of what he’s talked about.
            I’m far more worried about RFK in charge of public health because he can do that with basically no effort.

          2. Hopefully even the Senate won’t confirm RFK. He’s a Democrat, after all. And crazy.

        4. I agree with anon at 8:31am. People are tired of how things have been under the current administration, which Kamala has been apart of for the past 4 years. We need change.

          Of course, this is an unpopular opinion on this particular blog but not in the country.

          3. Agreed. Really wasn’t about hate for most people I know. It was about the economy and, for many in my circle, about the war in Israel. Setting aside abortion, cultural issues do not matter all that much to most people and it was stupid to campaign as if they did. He made huge gains in minority voters (like Hispanics and Muslims) while running against a minority candidate…. that’s how much people are rejecting the democratic administration. The republican ads that were “[Democrat] is for they/them. [Republican] is for you” pretty much summed it up. I hope the democratic party can take this result and learn from it instead of continuing to espouse that over 50% of the country — their own neighbors, friends, colleagues — is stupid/hateful. That message is not working. The map is turning more red.

          4. 9:18, I thought that was a very well done ad. I didn’t agree with the message, but objectively it played to a large swath of the country without being over the top.

            Many of his other ads were rambling or fear-mongery, but they nailed that one.

          5. +1 on the stupidity of campaigning on social issues. I am 100% in favor of a woman’s right to choose and believe abortion should be legal nationwide. I believe LGBTQ+ deserve to have their human rights protected, but I don’t believe either of those issues is the primary motivating factor for a majority of voters. I certainly tuned that out.

            I also believe Trump is a fascist, but calling him one won’t win you the working class vote, and that’s the majority of the country. I had a lot of hope and optimism with the “weird” messaging over the summer and was sad to see the campaign move away from that. Also disappointed that Harris wasn’t able to better communicate to the everyman (gender intentional) that her policies would help their household budget. Economics is tough to make consumable and bite-sized, so the short hand of “things were better 4 years ago, trump must be the reason” is an understandable mental shortcut for people.

            I think Hillary nailed it back in 2015– there’s a small portion of trump voters who are a basket of déplorables, but many of them just needed to be convinced of a better alternative. Harris didn’t do that, unfortunately.

          6. Anon at 9:28, that’s cute, but the “they/them” was a dog whistle you failed to hear about LGBTQIA issues.

          7. And what about Trump makes you think that he’s the change we need?

            The train of thought always seems to stop at this point. “Well I don’t like how things have been. Eggs are more expensive! We need change.” That doesn’t mean that Trump is better! Connect the dots for me!

          8. I’m gobsmacked that after last night’s total stomping of Kamala Harris, the women here are so dumb that they think *doubling down* on insulting 71 million voters is the right idea.

            Advice: when you get trampled that badly in an election, your first order of business is to STFU and listen to what an infuriated electorate just told you.

            Take it or not. If it’s the latter, we will have President JD Vance in 2028.

          10. I don’t get it. Why can Trump & Co. expect to be able to insult the electorate without it destroying their chances, but Democrats can’t? Can someone explain?

          11. Yep, 10:28. I voted D and am sickened by the result, but the women here acting like their opinion is the one anointed way is not it.

          13. well, Republicans did not take a step back and listen to the electorate in 2020. They doubled down, tried to overturn the result, leaning into misinformation and their big lie. This is how they won this time.
            Listening and understanding is the knife in this gun fight, completely pointless.

          14. Reminds me of the tweet that said “no I do not support all women. Some of you b****** are very dumb” will continue to be relevant.

          3. A majority of Americans prioritised the price of gas and cereal over tick tock climate change, human rights, so… yeah, I think we get to be mad today. Should we stay in that state forever? No, of course not. Are there things we can do? Yes, absolutely.

            But today, I’m not inclined to show a ton of grace for people who knowingly voted for a maniac.

          5. See this sort of attitude is exactly the reason I gave my kids for why I voted for Kamala: We all lose when the president normalizes contempt, disparagement, disrespect for [fill in any class, ethnicity, gender] and intellectual laziness. No policy wins make up for that, in my opinion.

            I have voted for both Republicans and Democrats in my life, and I’ve often voted for the loser, actually…but I have always believed whoever was elected president was trying to do right by all Americans and bend the arc of history toward justice, blah blah blah. I do not believe that about Trump, and that’s what makes me sad. I agree with criticisms that Democrats sometimes play too nice when Republicans are out for blood, but I also see the environment Trump created in the casual cruelty and dismissiveness of a lot of the comments today.

        6. The Trump supporters I know IRL are entirely motivated by bitterness or fear. They are wealthy enough that they’re vote wasn’t because of grocery bills being too high, but there’s something in life that they are very bitter about. That something varies. My brother is angry that his $200k+ household income doesn’t get him a bigger house and move savings (never mind his bad financial decisions), another person is worried about the “transgender threat” when I’m 99% certain they don’t know a single transgender person in their life, another straight up dislikes the amount of Hispanics in this country (never mind that this is a foreign born person).

          1. Right – the Trump supporters I know are not living paycheck to paycheck. They’re wealthy and bitter.

          2. Ok, 10:13– you don’t know any Trump supporters who live paycheck to paycheck because you don’t talk to anyone living paycheck to paycheck. Regular working-class people are tired of the liberal elitist condescension.

            I had to have my car towed recently and rode with the tow driver back to the repair shop. He was about 30, black male, told me he had been driving tow trucks since he was a teen. Single dad raising two young daughters and recently lost his wife. He wanted to talk about the election– and he was voting Trump. He said he was voting Trump because he couldn’t afford a Halloween costume for his daughters after paying for groceries, gas, and rent. He said it didn’t make any sense that he works all day, every day, has a second job, and still can’t give his girls something as simple as a Halloween costume.

            He also said he wants a strong leader and is worried about war. He said there were no major military conflicts during the previous Trump administration, but now we have Ukraine, Israel, and every day is closer to potential WWIII. He believes Trump will shut that down.

            He said his oldest daughter runs track and that a boy at her school has put himself on the girls track team. He said he doesn’t have an opinion on “the trans issue” but “everyone knows boys are bigger and faster, and anyone with common sense knows that’s not fair to the girls.”

            Have a discussion with a convenience store clerk, a server, a factory worker (some of whom voted solely because of no overtime tax), or anyone who has felt ignored and belittled in the last four years. They’re not bitter, and they don’t appreciate being treated like they’re dumb. They just want to be able to provide for their families.

          3. You are living in a bubble. I am related to a lot of Trump supporters in the rural south who ARE living paycheck to paycheck and inflation was huge – along with the media-fueled narrative that the economy is terrible and getting worse (that steady drumbeat of “recession is coming” did a lot of damage). You might think (and I agree) that Trump will not help them – but these are generally not people who are reading the NYT or WSJ. What they know is that the economy now is not working for them and they blame Democrats.

            And they know you despise them. They know you look down on their religion and their values – SAHMs, jobs that pay $35K a year, hunting season, HS football on Friday and church every Sunday. They hear you when you talk about “cis-gendered men,” “Boomers”, and gullible people who believe in a “magic sky father”. They resent that liberals will say things about men, of white people or Christians that they would never say about women, a specific minority group, or Muslims. (And yes – I know you think it is OK because white Christians are still running the country – but that is not the reality they are living.)

            They resent the constantly changing PC language of the moment that people who do not live on social media and did not attend college cannot possibly keep track of. They are really, really tired of identity politics and the inability to celebrate national heroes ( at least white ones) without pointing out their treatment of women or minorities. They are just as tired of performative PC crap that does nothing to make anyone’s life better. They are tired of trigger warnings and land acknowledgment statements.

            They are angry that you say “trust women” – right up until you tell women who are not in favor of abortion on demand that they hate women. Do they know transgendered people? No – but how many women do you personally know who needed an abortion to save their lives and could not get them? While some are cruel, most just do not want boy and men playing women’s sports, boys in the girl’s locker rooms, people with p*nises in women’s prisons and steam rooms, etc. And it is not because they think trans women are a threat – it is usually because they are worried about men taking advantage of the access.

            Look – I am a lifelong Democrat. I voted for Harris. I gave money and time. And that was despite the fact that I said when the Democrats forced Biden out that she could not win. I think Trump is a frigging terrible human being. But how entitled and arrogant do you have to be to consign more than half the country (including a lot of women and minorities) to being racist, misogynistic morons?

            Also please dear God – stop saying Latinx, “cis-gendered”, “pregnant person”, or “unhoused person” (and all of the other words of that ilk). It is not helping anyone and makes you sound pretentious.

          4. LOL, that’s a good laugh, the mean things people say about white conservative men pale in comparison to the violence they want to unleash against us.

          6. So I get it’s not the platform to run on . But here , anonymously, I am truly trying to figure out the motivations for voting for Trump. You say it’s not because people are stupid, but then are giving examples of people being stupid. So what are we supposed to do here. Kamala did not run on an elitist platform. I barely heard her mention anything about trans rights or cis gender men .

            I live in MA so I guess I am in a huge bubble but I really just don’t understand (and I grew up poor here and am in public service). Everyone I know who supports Trump is either hateful or dumb. I’m sorry that’s insulting to people, but I have yet to meet a smart person who supports Trump (or even a smart defense of Trump). I am genuinely looking for that if someone can point to that. I understand smart people supporting republican policies or platforms. But him specifically.

            There’s no need to get outraged about the fact that I said that and it’s “what’s killing the Democratic Party” I of course understand that we can’t run on a platform of contempt. But we do need to recognize how the gutting of education in this country is contributing to this

          7. 10:55, I’m a current Southerner and I also am from a firmly red town. The people are bigots and have been my entire life. It’s not new under Trump. They were bigoted against gay people. They were bigoted against interracial dating. They may not use the loud slurs, but there are absolutely many people sitting in the South couching it in just my personal beliefs or whatever soft language excuse to be bigots.

            I also know that many of those people are in $35,000 jobs because of the choices they made. I’m friends with people who worked in factories until they closed and almost none of them save for a few sought training for higher paying roles. They went to work in retail instead. The solution to that problem is vote for a higher minimum wage but it would also apply to people of color and that was why unions were busted in the first place in the south.

          9. My hometown, a small city in a blue state, voted for Trump. First time voting for a Republican. People are poor, 80%+ low/moderate income, in a post-industrial city where all the factories have closed.

            I think fear and perceived lack of power/control over one’s life motivated these votes in a historically Democratic area.

            I heard people complain the “ill3gals” are taking jobs/welfare (Schrodinger’s immigrant, both lazily collecting bennies yet stealing jobs)…in a city without a large migrant population. I also heard a lot about the economic woes, with people claiming Trump will reopen the factories that have been shuttered for decades.

          10. 11:42, to answer your question, a lot of smart people realize they aren’t electing a person but a philosophy and a government. So they vote “for Trump” because he’s the choice representing more of what’s important to them. They aren’t necessary voting for the man. Just like I voted for Harris/Walz not because I liked either of them, but because I think democrats do a better job of running the country.

        7. Inflation started when Trump intervened to ensure gas prices went up. When gas prices fell at the start of the pandemic, at the behest of oil companies, he begged the ME and Russia to cut production. This is well-documented. And it is emblematic of how DJT thinks the government should be run, so it is not an outlier situation at all. This is exactly how he operates. It’s just about trading favors for his own immediate gratification of feeling like he is “getting a deal done”. He doesn’t understand or care to consider broader, longer-term implications, which is why a guy who runs a business, even if good at it, is not necessarily good at POTUS. People are poorly informed and do not know how to connect to cause and effect. They just attribute “now” to the current president.

        8. And somehow they think trump’s plan to deport the millions of immigrants who keep grocery products like chicken somewhat affordable on day one is going to lower their grocery bills? Come back next July and see how that is going.

          1. It’s wild how so many people don’t realize that their capitalism relies on abusing POC. You only have cheap chicken because you’re giving people PTSD. You only have cheap Amazon goods because people are dying in warehouses.

          2. It’s just proof that people are bigoted and ignorant. Is that the ideal Democrat campaign message? No. But it is damn true.

          3. The only way I can make any of this make sense is that DJT wants to do a purge of the educated and force them to tend strawberries.

        9. Resurrecting my handle from 2016. This reasoning is on par with or perhaps a bit worse than what I’d expect from a lab rat. I expected a bit better from the American population, but apparently I was wrong.

          I don’t know how you can ignore the myriad examples of rank sexism and racism in the republican party and from Trump specifically and act like hatred doesn’t have anything to do with it. Trump’s primary message is “you’ll get yours and get to stick it to the libs.”

          3. Right?! They called her the c word. Don’t know how you can claim there was no sexism.

          4. My “Christian” SIL called her a c*nt. On social media! And obviously has no shame about it.

            I don’t think we need to insult randos on an internet board (see examples way above) but I feel completely justified in going no contact with SIL.

        10. I grew up in a red, rural area. The reality is that wages for those individuals will not go up unless the government raises the minimum wage. The median household income is around $35,000 and less than 20% have college degrees. Part of their voting rationale isn’t the cheap goods. It’s that the GOP has consistently told them they will bring back jobs for white men. That’s what the narrative relies on, even unspoken. The last time those voters were in a good place truly in their minds was when they had majority access to the workforce. So we have to also deal with the realities that in a global economy, we can’t have cheap goods without cheap labor which means you will be able to afford less stuff. How would that work exactly otherwise?

          1. Blue collar family here. My dyslexic welder brother has no problem figuring out that if Trump raises steel tariffs more, he’s not going to get much more work. I don’t think giving people a pass because they didn’t take economics is a legitimate excuse.

        11. I love how the left, which, believe it or not, generally does try to implement policies to make all people’s lives better, are constantly being told we should be “nicer” or more understanding of people who only want to stomp on anyone they can and make everyone as miserable as they are. You never hear anyone say, Hey rightwingers, maybe you should listen to why it’s a good idea to have a nonpartisan civil service, a functional FDA, rules about food safety and pollution, etc.

          Nope, we are all supposed to listen to and show compassion for their hatred of anyone who isn’t just like them. And we’re also not supposed to push back on their complete and utter misunderstanding of how economics or the government or vaccines work.

          1. By all means push back! But stop with the blanket dismissive statements that “71 million people hate women.” It is reductive and not the truth (some of them do, along with all the other isms, but for some their view of loving women looks different than yours!), and it is LOSING ELECTIONS

          3. Absolutely reject Anon 11:32’s idea that the maga republican view of loving people just “looks different” and we are being reductive in calling hatred what it is.

            WTAF.

        12. Oh yes, by all means, elect the fascist so long as the price of eggs comes down.

          I cannot properly express how tired I am of the grocery excuse.

      1. I am not OP, but I assume she just meant that Trump won or is currently leading in every swing state, such that the race was called last night not dragged out into the rest of the week. He is also leading the popular vote, which not many people predicted.

    1. Did anyone else read the comment in the NY Times yesterday – someone wrote that they noticed a husband directing his wife to vote the full MAGA ticket and then watched her as she filled in her ballot. And then he gave her his ballot to fill out ???!!!

      1. Voting should have privacy for each person individually. No person should coerce any other person’s vote

      2. Oh please. Give it up. Trump won fair and square. If the Dems wanted to win they needed to do better. In politics the nice people don’t earn the right to govern because they are nice or more moral. Study power. Read Machiavelli and stop whining on a fashion blog.

      1. Umm women voted in droves for DJT as well so…

        You can’t just write off people who disagree with you. But white wealthy suburban women will cry about being hated so they can feed their victim mentality. Cry to me when you’re scared to walk around outside without your hijab on like my relatives are.

        Signed,
        middle class woman of color who didn’t vote for either

          1. I refused to play into the choices I was given. I couldn’t vote my conscience with either candidate and that is what matters to me most. My issue with Kamala is she doesn’t have a stable track record – she kept running as if she wasn’t part of an incumbent administration. I get she’s not the incumbent, but still?? Point to literally anything you did for 4 years? What do you stand for? I also share part of her ethnicity and was so angered by this idea I was obligated to vote for her bc of that and her being a woman. Neither my sex nor my people are a monolith.

          3. I don’t understand how Kamala’s track record means you couldn’t vote her when the other option is a literal rapist felon.

          4. That’s the point. Republicans don’t worry about voting their conscience. They fall in line. For whatever reason Dems don’t, unfortunately.

          5. Yes. She wasted her vote. I am so tired of this moral high ground mentality that does not factor in reality.

          1. They live in another country, and they do not care about this election. My stateside relatives mostly voted DJT (first and second gen immigrants in urban enclaves, highly educated).

          2. Oh okay, so your relatives’ fear isn’t actually pertinent to this election. You just want everyone to know that you and your family have it worse than everyone else and insult “wealthy, white, suburban” women. Productive.

          3. Your relatives aren’t even in this country and you’re referencing their fear without acknowledging that? Talk about crying about being hated to feed into a victim mentality…

        5. I’m glad your relatives are in a shitty situation :) It can always be worse, so you and them should really shut up.

        6. Yes, many women voted against our own interests, unfortunately. ~internalized misogyny~

  4. I don’t know how to be an engaged citizen at this point. What are your favorite low drama news sources? Like, this time when he puts kids in cages I don’t want to hear about it.

    1. I’m Indian and we went through elective fascism. Don’t worry, the media will all be low-drama and heavily sanitised from now on. Jeff Bezos and Patrick Soon Shiong made sure of that.

      2. +1 my family is originally from Pakistan and my mom often remarks how the US is starting to politically look like Pakistan, including the media who is unwilling to speak out against the government because of threats and intimidation.

    2. Stop consuming online news entirely. Subscribe to weekly long-form journalism, and pick only 1-3 sources. I do the Economist and weekend WSJ (used to be the Times but the delivery person for the Times is terrible).

      If you must consume daily news, the BBC World Service and PBS News Hour both have podcast feeds you can engage with.

      1. I actually think more people should do this whatever their political affiliations, as it allows space and time to focus on community building actions and allows one to read thoughts that have had a week to form rather than thoughts cranked out in half a day. But ymmv!

        1. Thank you for this thoughtful response. I appreciate it even outside this conversation text.

      2. +1 that weekly seems way better for being generally well informed and for staying sane, if that’s what you’re aiming for. You get the main points without the minute-by-minute stress that doesn’t really help most of us in either department. My goal is to move more toward reading the Economist and just occasionally poking at my local papers, ideally in paper form. Hard to do, but I think it’ll be helpful for me.

    3. ProPublica and The Guardian would really benefit from your monetary support, especially when WaPo and LA Times (and NYT) are completely trash

  5. So this is really who we are? Cruel and ignorant? I never really believed it until now.

    1. Yeah. You could write off 2016 as a fluke or people hoping he’d be better than he appeared or Hillary running a bad campaign but this is clearly just who we are.

      1. Woman-hating is what we are. There is literally no other explanation. “But the economy!” is stupid as hell because anyone with half a brain knows that Trump’s crazy instability isn’t good for the economy.

        2. I read something that resonated: Dems women’s votes, which should resonate with women. But then they can’t even tell us what a woman is or push for men and boys on women’s and girls teams and I feel like they spend too much energy on fringe issues that they turn off the middle and yet keep taking them for granted. They have own-goaled this and so many other issues (crime, economy, etc).

          1. Trying to blame Democratic women for 70 million people choosing to elect an anti-democratic convicted felon with dementia over a competent sane woman is not the winner of an argument you seem to think it is. I happen to agree with you on some of the sports issues but there is no way that I would think that specific issue is worth electing a convicted felon with dementia.

          3. Spot on. Combine it with pandemic lockdown overreach, refusal to end mask mandates, and you have lost the room. If democrats want to win they need to focus on why they actually lost the popular vote. They have consistently done unpopular things. And to be clear, I voted blue.

          4. I agree. Pretending they don’t know what a woman is was the worst own goal in recent years. The polls will bear that out. Between that and letting Biden run again, they only have themselves to blame.

          5. Stop pandering to the fringe on every possible thing. The votes are more in the middle on everything.

          6. Anon @ 8:06 and 8:42, I am right there with you. Also voted blue, but yes, a million times yes.

            Also, why did we ever pretend that Biden had any shot against Trump? Harris wasn’t even top of the ticket until basically August 1. WHY DID IT GET THAT FAR? I like your phrase – this was fully “own-goaled” and whoever is calling the strategy shots for the D’s at the top needs to do some hard core reflection.

        3. yes, at least one man made his wife vote full MAGA (see the comment in the NY Times yesterday about it where someone in the midwest observed a man making his wife vote MAGA)

          1. Someone writing on the internet that they saw something happen somewhere is .. hardly a sign voter coercion was a big factor in the elections. As frustrated as I am with the electorate right now, it helps no one for the same side to start over focusing on random rumors that can just as easily come from a Russian troll farm

        1. at least one husband made his wife vote MAGA (see NY Times). I would like to know how many there are… since the women have to live with them

          1. But it goes the other way too. There was a guy on CNN last night saying he voted for Kamala because his gf threatened to break up with him if he didn’t.

          3. And also, do you want to date someone who votes for someone who doesn’t believe women are equal? Feels like a legitimate deal breaker.

    3. Democrats won’t come back until they get a good state governor who has prominence and can run well nationally. Josh Stein from NC? State is purple and went for him and Trump. Trump is term-limited, so it already 2028.

      1. He’s supposed to be term limited. Do you think he won’t at least try to figure out a way to avoid leaving in 2028?

        1. I think he’ll be dead before then. Pretty sure there will be an election of some sort in 2028 but it may be successfully rigged (with Russia’s help) for the Republicans.

        2. There’s no way he’s going to leave in 2028. First they’ll argue the limit is two consecutive terms, and then they’ll try to get rid of the limit. The term limit won’t be around. He’ll be President until he dies and then it will be Vance or Ivanka.

        4. I doubt Trump will make it through four years–then we will have Vance finish out his term, and run again in 2028.

    4. Yes. We are getting what we deserve. This nasty, cruel country will go extinct, just like the planet.

      1. It’s too bad we’re going to take the animals down with us, they don’t deserve it even if humans do.

        1. I know. I honestly feel really bad for them. And for children growing up in other countries.

    5. And apparently Biden was too old, but someone who stands and awkwardly sways to music is who this country likes

      1. And constantly forgets what state he’s in! In the last few weeks of the campaign he regularly said things like “hello Pennsylvania!” in NC, which seems like as bad or worse than any of Biden’s misspeaking. If you watch videos from even 4 years ago he’s so much sharper and more articulate and he wasn’t a coherent speaker back then. We literally elected someone with dementia.

      2. I have a relative who was convinced that that incident, along with many others, was utter proof that no one would ever vote for Trump. I knew she was wrong but I’m still sad for her today because she had hope and I didn’t. It’s hard to lose hope.

      3. That is why Trump won. You all lie all the damn time.

        He didn’t sway to the music because he’s senile; he did it because someone had a medical emergency.

        Cut the crap. Or not, and the GOP will just keep riding to victory.

    6. You didn’t? Are you in your 20s? I processed all of these emotions in 2016. This time I’m not surprised, just disappointed.

      1. Same. I don’t feel much at all. Now my DH is suddenly feeling how I did in 2016, and it’s annoying AF. I TOLD YOU.

    8. I had a horrible gut feeling this was going to happen. Seeing the way people behaved during the pandemic shocked and horrified me and watching people literally die and mistreat and abuse healthcare workers really gelled something in my mind about the average “working class/conservative/Republican/whatever term you’d use here” voter: it’s not logical or rational, and they will literally not just vote against their own interests, they’ll *die* to “own the libs”.

      My own mother, who I really do love, said that “someone” (a man/male presenting person) with painted nails handed her a coffee at a coffee shop and she was “wondering where his hands had been, ick” like the implication is if someone is non gender conforming, let alone trans, they are *dirty* both literally and figuratively. And she’s a loud-mouthed Christian. I was like “what happened to the Jesus that hung around with the lowest members of society? Has he left the building?” But these type of emotional reactions are the reality for MANY more Americans than we think.

      I’m deeply saddened but not all that surprised.

      1. Yeah, the vaccine refusing raw milk drinking crowd is a risk to all of us. What’s next, intentionally eating the prion affected deer?

      2. Same. I was genuinely shocked in 2016 but I have had a horrible feeling about this election all along.

    9. Yes, this is who we are and who we always have been, racist, sexist, and white supremacist. It’s ugly.

      1. I had naively clung to the notion that the next generation of men would be less sexist. Instead too many of them have drunk from a well of Joe Rogan, video games and porn and are truly appalling.

        1. I mean yah but when the topic of p*rn comes up here, posters say it’s normal and natural to watch it and call women who don’t like it “prudes”. So pick a lane.

        2. It’s very appealing to men, they don’t have to cook, clean, or service themselves. They can just force someone else to, and when the pesky bang maids misbehave there is now government force.

        4. P*rn is not the cause of younger men becoming rightwing. Elder millennial men grew up with online p*rn but Gen Z men are the ones who’ve swung dramatically to the right. I think it has way more to do with people like Joe Rogan and online disinformation (thanks Russia).

          2. Ok? But it’s not what moved the needle electorally. The divide is between Gen Z men and millennial men, and most millennial men grew up with online p*rn.

    3. Hey, you never know. Maybe it was on purpose. Isn’t this election showing us what people really think?

  7. This election has killed all good in me. What tips do you have for me to be selfish and get ahead? (short of breaking the law, my insides aren’t dead enough for that yet, but soon)

    1. For women though, I am not sure that the path ahead is to be selfish – – I think of “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams” – Eleanor Roosevelt.

    2. Ditch your Trump-loving parents in their crappy red state and let them deal with the consequences of their choices. Maybe women leaving those states en masse and withholding all their free labor will start making a difference. Trump has torn families apart and maybe now it’s time for women to just cut those final ties to parents who don’t want you to have rights. That’s the kind of selfish I’m thinking about.

        1. But we’re talking about how to be selfish, not how to help anyone. I’m so sick of women always being told to help others. This time they need to help themselves and get the f out of states that will let them and their daughters die from a miscarriage. It’s life and death. But we’re probably facing a national abortion ban anyway .

      2. Not the OP. I personally did that after 2016 and sadly it wasn’t enough. They value their bigotry more than they do me and their grandchild.

        1. I’m so sorry. It’s incredibly hard to see family cling to those false values to the detriment of their own offspring. How is their bigotry going to serve them on their deathbeds?

      3. What about those of us tied to crappy hellscape red states by an elderly parent who doesn’t hold vile thoughts? My 90+ year old father, the product of a southern rural farm community, is the first person I knew IRL who years ago identified the then candidate Trump as “vile, vulgur, and not suited for any office.” He was not a Vanity Fair reader or otherwise familiar with Graydon Carter, those are just his own words. I am stuck here. I look around me a nearly everyone I see is a MAGA supporter of the christo-fascist regime to come.

        1. You take him with you to a different state. Is he really going to hold you hostage there? And if so, is that someone you want to continue supporting?

          1. Yeah I’m going to uproot a 94 year old man to suit my wishes. Not that selfish, sorry.

        2. Thanks to you both for being there and voting blue.

          Part of the rights plan for years has been to use local social issues to purge left leaning voters from purple/red states. They are running/moving out. This ensures they stay red. And this keeps the electoral college in red’s favor.

    3. TBH I’m going to stop being nice to my MAGA MIL and SIL. I’ve been decent with them solely to not cause a family rift but I don’t care anymore. I don’t like them, why should I care if they like me?

      1. I’m calling my doctor to get an IUD as soon as my morning meetings are over.

        1. I made an appointment to get an IUD next week without even considering the election. I’m so glad I did. We are older and somewhat on the fence on having another kid, but the decision has been made for us now. I have a history of miscarriages that need intervention (D&Cs), so I just can’t take that risk, even living in California. Before you argue that I’m safe here, the last time I needed a D&C a few months ago, I was denied care by two separate ERs before they finally reached out to the OBGYN on call because I was bleeding out and blacking out in the waiting room. By some luck, it was my personal OBGYN who knew my history and was able to perform an immediate D&C on me. I would not be here today if I were in any red state or with a federal ban.

      2. Literally just bumped up my OBGYN visit to November to get permanent birth control done.

        1. The R plan for Obamacare will make insurance more expensive or financially prohibitive for anyone with preexisting conditions. If you have good coverage now either through your job or the current market, and can afford it, I would accelerate treatment.

      4. Just bought Plan B online for anyone who needs it. It has a multi year expiration date.

    5. Are you married? If not, do a glow-up hard core and marry the richest man you can, and use the power and leverage that comes with that to do what you want. Only kind of kidding? (Sob).

  8. I am feeling pretty hopeless this morning, so I set up a recurring monthly donation to planned parenthood. I am disappointed and terrified, but I can’t do nothing.

    what are others doing for self care?

    1. I’m staying home today. I was supposed to go into the office today and to a happy hour after work, but I just can’t muster up the energy and enthusiasm. I told my boss I’m not feeling well and will be working from home.

    2. Any other charity ideas for recurring donations? I want to help women, specifically. PP is a good one but looking for more recs.

      1. Local abortion funds will be better able to channel your donation right to women in need than PP! There’s also DV charities, I like Tahirih Justice Center but there’s plenty of them.

      3. +1 to the National Abortion Fund. I also have a reoccurring donation set up for Plan C.

        1. * recurring. Plan C the organization that mails abortion pills, not for me to continually get it.

      4. for abortion funds, I’d recommend ARC Southeast (focused on SE US, where it can be very difficult to access abortion).

      5. Ha. Women helped get us into this, right now I’m not in the mood to help any of them.

      2. Get one! I sat on the floor and let my two rescues crawl and drool all over me for a while this morning. It helped enormously.

    4. If the House doesn’t flip, the Rs are going to be cheerily cutting social programs. Our states and charities will need to pick up the pieces. I would wait and see what you think the greatest need is.

    5. I’m baking challah for my Jewish neighbors and signing up to mentor low income college students weekly in 2025.

      1. This is so sweet. How did you sign up as a mentor for low income college students?

        1. Not sure about the OP but I work with an organization called Braven which has a big presence at my undergrad (Spellman). I feel like those kids are really, really suffering today especailly.

    6. I just emailed my therapist, whom I haven’t seen in a while, and requested an appointment.

    7. If I’m in a blue area where abortion and women’s healthcare is currently legal, what’s the best place to donate to?

      1. I care a lot about abortion, but the social safety net in general is also important. I am prioritizing local food banks and domestic violence shelters, because I think those issues are going to affect a lot of women of all ages in my area and will potentially have less federal funding over the next four years. I worry they will get lost in the reproductive rights shuffle (which is also important, but based on the comments here and elsewhere, I think other women are doing an amazing job focusing on).

    8. I think I’m going to start planning Christmas decorations. I was completely uninterested in the holidays until about 5 minutes ago when I clicked on a holiday decorating article instead of the news.

      This is extreme and was already on the books, but I also am very thankful I have my bisalp scheduled in two weeks. I had decided after Dobbs to do it, and the timing was finally working out now. But it feels more necessary than elective.

        1. I just bought a 18 piece Christmas village on Facebook marketplace. Hello new collection.

      2. My late mother (whom I’ve posted about before, she would have been all y’all’s second mother) was hospitalized mid 2017 and was very mentally foggy. They were asking her questions to see how well oriented she was in place and time and asked the question “who is the president of the United States?” She replied “oh, that asshole.”

        Anyway, she had a collection of mini Hummel plates, I don’t know why, but it delighted her. So I just put those up even though they’re not even close to being my style. Enjoy your collections!

    9. I’m upping my monthly donation to the Southern Poverty Law Center. They do a lot of good work, and stay on top of identifying extremist groups.

  9. Has anyone ordered jewelry from Jet Set Candy before? I loved charm bracelets as a kid but wanted a silver necklace from there that echoes other pieces that aren’t so practical as daily drivers.

    1. yes, I’ve gotten it as gifts for our au pairs given the travel themes. they’ve always been well received and can be subtle while also meaningful. black Friday sales should be coming up.

    2. I have, and it’s decent quality. I have really reactive/acidic oily skin that ruins a lot of lower-priced jewelry and even wearing this day after day and to sleep in hasn’t affected the chain or charm. I got a chain and a single charm and it’s a *bit* more dainty and light/delicate than the marketing appears, but it’s an all around deal for the money, IMHO.

  10. Brit here. Can someone give me a Cliff Notes version on why it took so long to only partially prosecute Trump for his many crimes at the federal and state (Georgia) level? My Google-fu isn’t working today.

    Trump will waste no time chucking his opponents in jail. It doesn’t pay to play nice, Dems.

    1. That is one of the top things that drives me insane about the Democrats. They always want to play nice as if it’s going to make the bully be better to them.

    3. Because arguably, those were political prosecutions, and there was a good degree of resistance in the leftward legal wing to undertaking the prosecutions. The decisions around what, how, and where to prosecute all took time and thought.

      Beyond that, courts here (and everywhere) move slowly to allow time for thought, legal research, and appeals. We do not fast-track cases based on who the defendant is; otherwise, indigent defendants would face long delays and only rich defendants would receive the right to a speedy trial.

      It doesn’t pay to abrade the norms of our systems to pursue legal actions against our political rivals. Such actions should be done carefully and thoughtfully, with full respect for the constitution and the rights of poorer defendants.

      I say this, and I know I’m going to get comments highlighting our justice system’s myriad issues. I know. I work in the justice system. But the existence of those issues does not vitiate what I’m saying above. If we can’t get our principles straight on the big cases, we are hopeless on the little cases. And I work on the little cases, and I really care about maintaining what integrity our system has and bending it towards more, not less, integrity over time. What you are suggesting is antithetical to everything I am devoting my life to.

      1. But ALL of this is bad. Moving slowly means that people are wronged even when the final decision is right. Laws so complicated that they need extensive research aren’t equitable; they’re elitist. The status quo you’re describing favors rich defendants.

          1. I don’t think you’re responsible for it being such an uphill battle or that you aren’t doing good work. It’s just really hard to see “moving slowly” as a virtue of the system when delays do so much harm.

      2. I didn’t read @10:35’s comment as advocating for moving slowly for the sake of moving slowly – rather as advocating for moving thoroughly and carefully, even when (especially when!) there’s a political incentive to move fast and be a little sloppy. Slowness is a unfortunate side effect.

        1. Genuinely, how are people expected to follow laws if it’s this hard to figure out if they’ve been followed or broken?

          1. And I’m not saying legal can get back to people overnight, but four years is a lot of time!

          2. You do understand that this is, like, the single most legally and factually complicated legal issue the criminal justice system has dealt with since Watergate, right?

          3. It is extremely rare to have so many unique constitutional, equitable, political, and factual issues rolled up into a single case. Like, it does not happen. My cases are mostly simple and resolve quickly (often through pleas). Most criminal cases these days do. But a case of that complexity is a twice a century occurrence and should be treated as such.

    4. American prosecutors, state and federal alike, only want to try cases they think they will win. Also it takes a long time to get to trial (comparatively) especially if someone has a bunch of lawyers to represent them. The criminal system in many other countries moves a lot faster and isn’t so dependent on plea bargains to reduce caseload.

      1. He didn’t do anything wrong? I guess it’s a free for all on rape, selling classified secrets, and tax evasion

  11. I’m a new federal government employee as of this year and I’m terrified because I work in financial regulation. I’m worried DT is going to gut the agency by firing people and tying our hands so we can’t regulate big banks. Tell me it’s going to be okay…

      1. Same. I’m on maternity leave and wondering if I’m going to have a job to come back to. We just got some great new contracts that are probably first on the chopping block.

    2. I’d be very concerned if I were you. The plan is to replace all experts with average Joe’s.

    3. There’s a great (!) use case already. The Turkish Central Bank and the lira after Erdogan ran all smart civil servants out of town in 2015-16.

    4. Oh, gosh. Yeah, I am qualified for and desire to do that job but did not pursue it in my recent job search for a personal reason. Maybe that was for the best, as I’d be so frustrated. The thing is, my clients in that space like good, clear regulation because it makes it easier to operate and evens the playing field. So many right wing ideas are just bad ideas in practice.

    5. Newish fed here whose probationary period ends the week after the inauguration.
      I’m really feeling like a naive idiot today for dedicating my life and career to public service for a public that thinks I shouldn’t be there.

    6. I think regulation will be safe. It’s still best not to steal from depositors, investors, etc. Rulemaking is a whole different story. FWIW the head of my agency under Trump was much more union-friendly and protective of the workforce than the current Biden appointee. Keeping my fingers crossed that something like that can happen again.

    8. I’m in anti-financial crimes but not for the government. Hopefully they won’t change those laws.

    9. I have a been a fed for several admins including under Trump. Everyone was worried about getting fired under his last admin. It was all for nothing, we were fine. And I’m in an agency that is regularly in his crosshairs.

      1. That is my hope too. I was at USAID in 2016 and we were fine. I’m now in DHS, so that *should* be fine

    10. sending lots of hugs your way. if you can stay and prevent your agency being taken over by people with no conscience, this stranger on the internet who is devastated this morning thanks you.

  12. On a light/frivolous note: has anyone with bunions tried calla or solebliss shoes? Are they comfortable/worth the money? My bunions are getting worse and my formerly comfortable office shoes are becoming uncomfortable.

    Reposting because I asked too late yesterday.

    1. I haven’t bought them but have looked into them and am also interested in hearing if anyone has tried them. I have moderate-severe bunions.

    2. Team bunionectomy if you have daily pain. I tried wearing supportive shoes with custom orthotics but the pain kept getting worse. I bought new shoes that were wide enough and eventually they became too small. I’m so glad I got surgery and it wasn’t nearly as bad as some people make it out to be. Yogatoes Gems won’t fix the underlying issue but they feel good for anyone with foot issues.

      1. I’ve thought about it but I’m fine in sneakers and my problem is office shoes so I don’t want to pursue surgery just yet. It’s good to hear your positive experience. If you don’t mind my asking are you able to wear more shoes more comfortably now? I read that even after the surgery you still have to be careful about shoe choice.

        1. Yes, I can wear whatever shoes I want for the most part. I feel some pain if I wear high heels too many days in a row or go for a long run without working up to it. Before surgery I was in pain all day every day even though I exclusively wore sensible shoes with orthotics. A couple weeks before my surgery I began experiencing knee pain from my weird gait so I’m glad I didn’t wait any longer. It was completely life changing.

      2. I am a medical malpractice defense attorney and I know my outlook is skewed – in my world, the complication rate of every single medical procedure is 100%. But I won’t have a bunionectomy unless I am desperate. I have seen way, way too many complications. Not deadly ones – just pain and disability and the need for additional surgeries.

        1. I’m on the insurance company side of that. I’m a no on VBAC and very skeptical of spine surgeries for the same reasons.

  13. Federal employees, what’s your plan? Wait until January and see how things go? Flee to the private sector now? Buckle down and hope for the best?

    1. I’m the new Fed from the financial regulation post above. My probationary period ends next March. I want to buckle down and hope for the best, but I’m concerned that I will be cut as soon as he takes office.

      1. Nothing happens that fast in government. I wouldn’t worry about your probationary period at all.

    2. Hope to fly under the radar for long enough until I decide what to do. That said, if I had a private sector job offer, I’d consider it.

      On the other hand, my agency runs old, so I imagine a lot of people will retire because of this election, which might make more room for me? I don’t know. Right now I’m just trying not to panic, and telling myself the federal workforce is so huge, they can’t get to all of us right away. Maybe?

    3. I don’t really have a job equivalent in the private sector. I used to work in local government so could go back to that maybe. But, that office was mostly funded by federal grant programs so I don’t even know if they’ll have money to keep staff. Also, I made peanuts and had terrible work life balance there.

      I love what I do, I’m passionate about it, it’s directly involved in helping people. I don’t want to throw in the towel.

    4. I’m a 15+ year fed. I will not leave unless I am personally asked to do something I find unethical. And even then I would probably make them fire me for refusing to do it. It didn’t happen during the last Trump administration (my work is largely non-controversial) but who knows what might happen this time.

    5. My federal fellowship that paid for grad school has a service obligation that completes in August 2025. My plan is to hunker down and pray I’m not out on my ass before then, or it becomes an extremely expensive student loan through no fault of my own.
      I hoped to finish out my career in the federal government, but why stick around and serve a public who doesn’t think I should have my education and do work that is usually performed by men?

      1. This is where I am emotionally this morning. I have given this job a lot of devotion and now it’s very likely that all our achievements will be scrapped. I have done my part and should probably go find a private industry job, fulfill my earning potential, and just enjoy all my privilege.

    6. My federal job was on the Schedule F list last time, so I’m concerned. I think it will take a while to get any big changes going, but next year will be frustrating as we navigate shifting policy directives and new, unknown leadership. I’m not job searching yet but I’d also be OK taking some time off to take care of my kids (DH’s job, touch wood, seems secure).

    7. 1. Hope I don’t get fired.
      2. Hope I don’t get asked to do anything seriously unethical. I think it would take a lot for me to quit because if I quit I know whoever replaces me will not be working with the best intentions.
      3. Continue to work on the mission as best as I can in this environment. I work with a lot of vulnerable people, so treat them with dignity and respect and keep doing work that will hopefully improve tbeir lives, even if it’s less effective than it was previously. If policies change and I’m not as useful as I once was, ah least I can be kind, moral, and respectful to the population I serve.
      4. If I do get fired, get a part time stop gap job to pay the bills. Retail, waitressing, babysitting – whatever I need to do. Keep applying to jobs in my field but also I am prepared to pivot if needed.

  14. Working on getting my mind off the future of our country by planning a weekend trip out of NYC with the missus for her birthday in mid-January. No car, so rail transit preferred, but we can rent one if necessary. My fantasy is a cabin with a wood fireplace, near a town with some Saturday activities that would remain tolerable in inclement winter weather. Looking at airbnbs in Beacon currently but haven’t found the fireplace yet. Where else should I be looking?

    2. Not sure if you’re up for a flight + car rental, but I have stayed in beautiful cabins with fireplaces in Asheville, NC. They are called Asheville Cottages.

    3. I’d go a little further up the Hudson valley and try Hudson, Saugerties or Catskill.

  15. I say this as a preacher’s kid… I blame [most flavors of] Christianity. It trains people from birth to believe whatever comes out of an authority figure’s mouth, regardless of how ridiculous it is. How can you expect critical thinking from a population who’s deepest conditioning is blind obedience?

    1. Thank you for qualifying “most flavors of.” I am a Christian and always have been, and nothing about this horror looks like Christianity to me.

      1. Apparently the vast majority of Christians disagree. Really unclear to me why anyone thinks they have the moral high ground.

    2. As a Christian I am deeply disappointed that mainline churches have not denounced the evangelical movement and certain political stances for being decidely un-Christian. We make too much space for “differences of opinion” and don’t stand up for what Christ really stood for.

    3. As an Episcopalian, I almost don’t even identify as Christian anymore because it clearly means something else to me than it does to others…

      1. Episcopalian here. Hit the point where I tend to have more in common with people of other faiths than other Christians.

        1. Yep. Another Episcopalian here. I want to reclaim the word Christian, but I don’t know how.

      4. The people in my extended family who go around letting everyone know they are Christians are some of the most vile people you will ever (hopefully never) meet.

    4. There are a lot of Christo-fascists out there who have deluded themselves that they follow their religion and are the embodiment of “Christian Values” that need to re-visit the sermon on the mount. And, you know, maybe the New Testament as a whole. I wish I believed in a fiery hell so I thought there were consequences for their evil hypocrisy. And if anyone’s response is “geez, are you okay?”, the answer is no, I am not.

      2. I’m the sad Episcopalian above, and I think about the beatitudes (the sermon on the mount a LOT). It really drives a lot of my life choices, both major (career choice in a helping career) and minor (turning the other cheek and being nice to all even when I don’t want to)

    5. Eh, I’m not a Bible-study Christian but there’s a New Testament in the Bible that maybe people could crack open.

    6. That is not a Christian problem. It is an ideology problem. You think the Taliban is big on free-thinking? You think the Communist party is encouraging critical thought?

      1. sure, but neither of those are relevant in the American context, whereas Christianity drives…a lot

        1. Fundamentalist “Christianity” drives absolutely everything where I live. It’s terrible for anyone who isn’t one of them, but there are Reasons I need to stay, at least for the next several years.

          1. Having escaped from that world myself, Christian fundamentalism is terrible for all of the people immersed in it, too.

          3. Thank you. From the outside, I now understand just how horribly toxic the fundamentalist brainwashing is. It has been years since I got out and I still find myself having to work through messed up mindset and behaviors that it cultivated.

    7. I was raised Episcopalian and have tremendous respect for the denomination, but I stopped practicing because I’m agnostic and don’t really believe in a higher power, the divinity of Jesus, etc. A lot of the lessons learned in church are things I have held onto though.

      I’m thinking of starting practicing again to help reclaim the label for people actually living like Jesus

    8. The country is getting less religious – not more. The number of evangelicals has gone down since 2008, not up. I am not a fan of Evangelical Christianity, but blaming it for this debacle is not really grounded in the facts as we face them.

      1. This. I’m Jewish and liberal, so no fan of evanagelical Christianity but the statistics about church attendance are eye-opening – it’s dropping off quickly. The religious right has caused a lot of problems in this country, but there are bigger issues here.

  16. I went online and ordered a stash of Plan B today. Maybe not rational but it made me feel like I am doing something to protect my daughters’ reproductive freedom.

    1. I’m about to schedule the replacement of my Nexplanon implant for January instead of the spring of next year, so I can get it done and have peace of mind that it’ll stay in me for a good 3-5 years.

      1. Do you really think so? Even in deep red states, this election showed clear majority support for abortion rights. I don’t think the Senate would pass a ban. (The House is another story).

        1. Check Project 2025, they want to use pharma regs to take it off the market rather than a ban per se

        2. All it takes is one state taking a wrongful death case like the fetal storage case to USSC for the conservative majority to hold that life begins at conception. Then all bets are off and we are all living according to Catholic doctrine.

    3. I posted above, but more appropriate here – I’m getting a bisalp in two weeks and I’m so glad today that that is already on the books.

      1. Get one. I’m serious.

        My life was saved by a D&C after an incomplete miscarriage. If I lived anywhere other than California, I’d worry about my ability to get one now.

        Also, my two subsequent children wouldn’t be here if not for that D&C. My daughter is a newly minted public school teacher and my son is a senior in college now doing a stem major. They both are/will be productive members of society.

        1. I posted above. I live in California and it was still hard for me to get a D&C for an incomplete miscarriage just a few months ago. An ER doctor refused to even physically examine me because I wasn’t bleeding out enough (soaking “only” 2 pads an hour, not 3+). My IUD is scheduled for next week.

      2. I’ve had one most of my adult life, but got mine replaced a little early after the midterms because I was worried about the republican supermajority in my state’s legislature. Do it.

    5. I did the same thing, and it’s coming in my carryon when we go to TX for Christmas. Slightly paranoid? Yes, for sure. But I would enjoy the conversation if my bags get searched.

  17. even in some local races the republicans beat the dems by more votes than was predicted. weather people and election predictors still get paid to do their job wrong. on a more positive note, we had a big school issue on the ballot that turned out the way i wanted, so at least that is good.

    2. Good Lord. People just hate “criminals” and don’t even think of incarcerated people as people.

        1. People are tired of the huge increase in petty crime and think jail should suck. It’s another bell-weather issue that democrats are missing.

          1. That’s my answer. The electorate wants incarcerated people to be as miserable as possible. Because the electorate is hateful.

      2. Don’t commit the crime? That way you can stay out of the awful, overcrowded prisons.

        1. Lol, there’s an optimistic view of our justice system. Thanks for the genuine laugh today.

          1. You’re welcome! I tried cheating in class once. I was so bad at it that I was caught almost immediately. I would probably be caught immediately if I tried to commit a crime (besides not reporting my babysitting money was I was younger).

      3. Look at the recall of Pamela Price in Alameda County. People are just effing sick of crime and criminals.

    3. I’m in SF and crime is ridiculous. I can’t even dine in Oakland without my window getting smashed.

        1. Yes! Berkeley or Oakland, everything goes in my pocket. I even get nervous in Rockridge.

          1. I live in the Elmwood and feel somewhat safer here because at least the police will come if called. In Rockridge, just a few blocks down the street, forget it.

      2. Same. And I voted for prop 6 too. Sick and tired of nothing happening to criminal assholes who are making our lives worse.

  19. Just going to leave this here – we can both point out that Trump voters have embraced truly hateful ideologies and rhetoric AND argue that Democrats shouldn’t campaign on that. Both are true. We need to speak about Trump’s utterly dehumanizing language about immigrants (and his threats against them, which his supporters have repeated with all the fervor of Nuremberg) so we can take action to protect the most vulnerable. Dems also need (again) to have a come to Jesus moment on why they can’t win elections.

    1. Sounds like Dems have it all figured out (they’re just smarter, more ethical, and more successful because they’re better!).

    2. Dems can’t win elections with a woman at the top of the ticket. It really is that simple.

      1. Yup. Tweet of the night for me was “so it wasn’t ‘but her emails’ it was ‘but they’re females.’”
        And I say that as someone who likes Hillary but does think she ran an imperfect campaign and isn’t the most likeable when she’s in politician mode.

      2. I always assumed the first woman president would come from the Right. She’d have to come off as conservative, so as not to scare all the men.

        1. That’s historically how it happens. Thatcher, etc. Although MAGA hates women so much I can’t see them ever nominating a woman. Someone like Nikki Haley or even Ivanka Trump could never beat a crazy man in a primary.

    3. Every single voter watched Jan 6 2020 unfold on live TV. A majority of them decided that between a President who disregarded his oath of office, attenpted to subvert democracy and staged an insurrection versus a capable woman, they chose the former. That is is not the Democrstic Party’s fault. American culture is truly rotten.

      2. yes, this is true….MANY people are extremely selfish and care literally only about the things that impact themselves, like the cost of bread at the supermarket and were convinced that Trump will help more with that. who cares if democracy overall stuffers as a result. the more ‘elite/educated’ Trumpists I know care about their wallets and are secretly/not so secretly racist/homophobic/xenophobic. I do not blame the Democratic party for the fact that there are so many selfish people in this country, but given that is who lives here, we need to find a way to message to them in terms that they care about. The fact that this is what needs to be done is sad and pathetic, but it’s reality

        1. Ha-ha, they’re not going to give up power without being forced to do so. This is traditionally where the courts have come in to save the system. I fear for our country and our form of government now.

      4. Republicans could have supported anyone as their candidate. That they’re thrown their support behind a bully and criminal, someone who can barely string two sensible sentences together, who incites violence and is incapable of admitting their own faults or mistakes, that says more about the republican voters than the democratic party.

    4. I’m curious what the polls show about immigrant voters in this election. All I can say is that my entire extended family of immigrants and just about everyone else in my immigrant community voted Trump. Immigrants support legal immigration with limits and rules, not basically a free for all.

      2. Counterpoint I live in a college town and the majority of people I know are immigrants (mostly Asian, some European) and none of them supported Trump.

        1. I live in a college town too, and the faculty senate voted to hold a normal schedule on Tuesday because so few of them were eligible to vote. They didn’t care that the students might need extra time to figure out how to vote for the first time because it didn’t impact them. There are emails to this effect that circulated internally.

      3. and yet, Trump torpedoed a reasonable immigration bill, and did everything in his power to make the visa process harder when in office.

        1. I don’t understand how people can’t grasp this, as well as the fact that illegal border crossings were much lower under the Biden admin than the first Trump admin. I really think it all comes down to stupidity and lack of education, which is a very worrying sign for the future.

  20. there was someone on here preemptively planning a trip to DC for inauguration day – you jinxed it!

      1. i’m (obv) kidding though I am a very superstitious person. I would stay far far far away from DC in January. im so sorry that you don’t get to go and witness the type of history many of us wanted

    3. At work, checking my phone every few minutes for texts to/from my friends and family, doomscrolling, trying to get my head in the game for multiple customer engagements today. It’s not working, friends.

    4. Daydreaming about a world without misogynistic, xenophobic, bigots. Checking in with my friends and loved ones, trying to keep the doomscrolling to a minimum. Breathing.

      Other than that, catching up on clerical tasks that don’t require me to be highly attentive.

    5. is there a way to send ice cream and wine to Kamala (and maybe Hillary too). I hope that Hillary calls her and shares some pearls of wisdom. also- what’s next for someone like Kamala? She is still fairly young

      1. She makes tons of money giving talks, writing books, working as a lobbyist or at a think tank.

        1. She can go back to being a senator, yes? And maybe try again sometime? Like many years from now?

          1. If I were her I would be sick of this country and politics and move to the Alps. Or something.

          2. She can only go back to being a senator if Adam Schiff or Alex Padilla give up their seats, which is unlikely to happen anytime soon. But yeah, it’s not impossible that she could run again in 20 years, though I certainly wouldn’t say we need another 70 year old senator.

    7. Not reading news sites. Doing the work I have to get done today for work. Watching baby animals and other mindless videos.

    8. Getting an energy audit to figure out how to make our house more energy efficient (and checking this site and election results while waiting for the contractors to do stuff). This was scheduled well in advance, but feels like a constructive way to spend the morning.

    9. I’m on a work trip (deployment really) in a very red area. I work for a nonprofit and do human services work during and in the recovery of disasters.

      So it sucks.

      The people I’m serving most likely voted for a candidate who doesn’t see me and my health as worthy or protection. I presume our work will be harder to do and funding will become even more scarce. I’m away from friends and family. I’m in BFE with really limited food options so can’t even get good comfort food. I’ve been deployed for nearly 2 months and have worked 12 hour days ~ 28 days a month. I am fighting off an illness. The job comes at an immense personal sacrifice and I’m normally happy to do it because I believe in the mission so strongly but it stings today.

    10. I just subscribed to the paper edition of the NYTimes. (Yes it has its faults but at least the editorial board made an endorsement.) Suggestions for other print editions of newspapers and magazines are welcome!

      I think I need to take a break from online news and social media. I picture myself coming home from work, fixing a cup of tea, or maybe something stronger, snuggling up with the dogs on the sofa, and reading a newspaper that is in my hands. I suppose if I see something of particular interest to me I can look up information online about it, but I think I need to be away from the immediacy, stress, and time suck of doom scrolling.

    11. I am loving on my baby and remembering that my day to day life looks pretty good, and thinking about how I can protect my peace in the next four years because 2016 to 2020 wasn’t it. None of my worry in those years made a difference and I’m not going to do it again. I will vote in every single election like I always have, but otherwise I am opting out.

    12. I am doing some low-effort administrative tasks that don’t require a lot of focus and thought. Just keeping my head down and trying to get through the day

    13. Alternating between being completely unproductive and researching how to deal with the economic shocks we are about to experience. Anyone have a primer on 70s stagflation?

    14. Turning the TV off and trying to meet work deadlines that have been ignored for a while.

  22. given that Trump doesn’t seem to be in the best health (though we don’t really know since he is the only candidate who didnt share medical records) and assuming he doesn’t in some way change term limits, is Vance really a trumpist? or did he become one because he wanted to be VP? like should I be as scared of Vance? Or is there someone out there who represents the former republican party?

    1. I think Vance believes whatever it’s politically advantageous for him to believe. And also that there’s a pretty decent chance Trump doesn’t survive his term and Vance becomes president, so we very well might get to find out!

      1. all of this.

        He is Machiavellian AF. I liked his book, and was surprised when he turned MAGA. I don’t *agree* with a lot of his talking points, and I think he has some trauma he should work through, but I think he’s smart, shrewd, and more thoughtful than Trump. Whether he stays MAGA if he doesn’t need to campaign on it will be interesting to see.

    2. Vance scares me more than Trump does. He seems far more likely to create a nationwide Handmaid’s Tale scenario.

        1. Agree. On a D&D alignment chart, I actually think Trump floats between neutral evil and chaotic neutral. Vance is chaotic evil.

      2. Agreed. I honestly don’t think Trump actually cares about things like abortion laws, immigration policies, inflation, whatever – he’s too stupid. All he cares about is winning and being seen as a god. He’s not actually willing to put in the work as President. But Vance will.

      3. Agree. Trump is a pig but I don’t think he’s calculating the way Vance is, and he’s definitely nowhere near as smart.

        The bright side is I don’t think Vance would have the support at the polls (assuming we have free elections). Trump has a cult of personality around him that no MAGA politician has replicated. They basically never win except with Trump on the ballot. But who knows if the ‘28 election will be free and fair — that’s a big “if” at this point.

    3. Not what you want to hear, but personally I’m way more worried about the possibility of Vance as President than Trump as President. I think Vance is the MAGA heir that can actually form a somewhat coherent argument, and he’s young and in good health. Plus I think Vance actually hates women much more hatefully than Trump does. My sole consolation is that if Trump can make it four years, there’s a good chance Vance will have four years of VP obscurity, and VP is a terrible position to run for President from.

    4. I think JD Vance cares about whatever is politically expedient for JD Vance.

    5. The one thing I will say about Trump v. Vance — I don’t think Vance stands a chance in a cult of personality. He might ascend if Trump dies in office, but he would be trounced in a primary. Probably by someone worse, but still.

      1. Yes, this is true – does anyone actually like him, or just like his proximity to Trump?

        1. I don’t think he was chosen because of any talent whatsoever other than being a yes man. But his calculus is probably that odds are Trump doesn’t make it 4 years. He’s morbidly obese and old. A stroke or heart attack is highly possible at his age.

  23. What do you do to feel pretty and good physically about yourself?

    My top things are barre class, IPL facials, tea with collagen, weights, Botox, long walks.

    1. Sleep! That’s the most important thing to me. I’m really protective about my sleep. It’s the best thing for my mental and physical health.

      I’m really into Korean skincare as well.

      1. Please drop your fave Korean skincare pics!

        I am a Japanese/Korean SPF fan already.

    3. gel pedicures, even though no one else sees them for most of the year. Spirinolactone for hormonal acne. Botox in my 11s.

    4. Lots of walking. I recommend it a lot. Breathing fresh air and getting outside (with SPF!) do wonders for how I feel about myself physically.

  24. Completely random aside that gave me a laugh: I googled a remote colleague trying to find his LinkedIn profile. That search highlighted that his somewhat common name is shared by a prolifically online guy who is fiiiinnne and knows it. Definitely not my colleague.

  25. Anon @ 11:24, I’m so sorry. My son was only a few months old during the 2016 election and I cried putting him to sleep for at least a week. I felt so guilty bringing him into a world that would vote for Trump as our leader. He’s 8 now and although I still cried this morning, and probably will tonight, at least I know I’m raising an open minded, feminist kid. Poo kid was so upset to hear about the election results when he woke up.

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