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Frugal Friday’s Workwear Report: Floral Cardigan

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A woman wearing a light brown skirt with a blue, green, and ivory floral cardigan

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

I saw a friend of mine wearing this cheery floral cardigan the other day and I was shocked when she told me it came from Amazon. The knit was soft, not itchy, and the pattern was so cute that I would have assumed it was from Anthropologie or something similar.

I think this would be a great casual Friday outfit, paired with dark denim (know your office) or high-waisted trousers. 

The sweater is available at Amazon and comes in sizes XS-XL. It also comes in seven other colorful patterns.

Sales of note for 5/1:

  • Ann Taylor – Friends of Ann Event, 40% off your purchase PLUS $50 off $200! Readers love this popover blouse, and their suiting is also in the sale.
  • Boden – 15% off new styles with code
  • Brooklinen – 25% off sitewide (ends 5/1) — we have and love these sateen sheets
  • Evereve – All tops on sale
  • Express – $39+ Summer Styles
  • Hatch – $15 off one of our favorite alarm clocks with code LETMOMSLEEP15
  • J.Crew – Up to 30% off wear-now styles
  • J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything, and extra 60% off clearance
  • Lands' End – 40% off sitewide – lots of ponte dresses come down under $25, and this packable raincoat in gingham is too cute
  • Loft – 60% off florals and 50% off your purchase
  • M.M.LaFleur – End of season sale. Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off.
  • Nordstrom – 1500+ new women's markdowns
  • Sephora – Hair deals daily – today 5/1 up to 50% off dae, Verb, PATTERN by Tracee Ellis Ross, and BaBylissPro products
  • Talbots – 40% off one item and 30% off your entire purchase
  • TOCCIN – Use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off!
  • Vivrelle – Looking to own less stuff but still try trends? Use code CORPORETTE for a free month, and borrow high-end designer clothes and bags!

232 Comments

  1. A friend suggested I try game – like DDR, WiFit, etc. – as a new at home movement tool/fun. I do not have any video game consoles like a PlayStation or ExBox. Anyone have experience with these recently? Any suggestions or recommendations? Aiming $250 or less if at all possible for setup and a little variety would be nice. No biking please but otherwise pretty open.

    1. I’ve been looking into something similar and there are a lot of dumb extra accessories for the games so it even costs more. If you can swing it I think the most fun ones are VR games like the Metaquest – beat saber, les mills body combat, i just bought the dance one but haven’t tried it yet. I also just synced my home rowing machine up to a virtual rowing world (EXR i think). otherwise i’d stick with youtube.

    2. We have the original Ninetendo Switch and get video games for our local library system for free. The Just Dance series and Switch sports get us up and moving. There is probably way more options than that too.

    3. You are going to have a very hard time doing this for less than $250, because any of the video game consoles cost more than that (like a switch or Xbox) and then you have the game costs on top of that.

      1. Unless you can get one secondhand. Look on your local Facebook marketplace for an older PS1/PS2 with mats or a first gen Wii. My young adult kid just did this for very little money.

    4. It’s not a real game, but someone gave my 8 year old a DDR mat and the whole family loves it. I’m guessing it was around $30, it’s just a mat with batteries.

  2. This cardigan is great!

    Question for you all: how would you style an old-school St. John pencil skirt in 2026? Of course, it’s a vivid color, not a dark neutral, so I think it needs to be fun-quirky-casual to work. White shirt + jean jacket? The elastic waist casing is throwing me. It is so comfy that I want to try to make this work. Tucked-out neutral sweater, like in cream, loafers on feet?

    1. I think your sweater and loafers combo is fine. The skirt isn’t really one I consider current, but classic enough to work styled like you suggest for a casual Friday in my office.

      I would not do the jean jacket look unless it is for the weekend. That gives Saved By The Bell in my mind.

    3. Slouchy sweater – tucked but with enough blousiness that you don’t actually see the waistband. Flats.

      1. +1 – slouchy or oversized sweater with more casual/modern shoes. A jean jacket and a white blouse would look very early aughts to my eye.

      2. Yes, I’d be reaching for a slouchy sweater or turtleneck. I probably wouldn’t do a standard pointy-toed flat since they can read very 2006, but would do a loafer, mule, or contemporary-type boot with a block heel (not a 2006 era flat riding boot).

      3. An option to hide the waistband might be a wide (not too wide) elastic belt?

        Kind of 1980s, but isn’t that style kind of coming back?

        1. I would only wear a broad elastic belt with an outfit that’s otherwise current, think a blousy midi shirtdress… not a pencil skirt that you’re already trying to modernize.

    4. Loafers or lug-soled flats of some sort; oversized/slouchy sweater. The first option sounds very dated to me.

    5. if you can i’d add a white shirt beneath the sweater. i’d skip the jean jacket.

    6. I like the Jean jacket and white shirt idea, personally.

      If I were doing this myself I might lean into the original aesthetic and try to find a sweater set type setup for the top, in a not matching but coordinating color.

  3. I’m really starting to see what other posters were complaining about with media coverage of Trump’s crimes. The story about Trump’s sexual assault of a minor appears absolutely nowhere on my New York Times app. I had to scroll for two minutes to get to the Clinton’s testimony and Trump’s name is nowhere to be found. Why is this happening at a newspaper that isn’t owned by Jeff Bezos or Murdoch? This is a riot in the streets story and we’re acting like it’s a snooze.

    1. It should be riot in the street territory. So should federal agents openly murdering US citizens exercising constitutional rights, the president using US military to depose the leader of a sovereign nation so he can control their oil industry, the president personally pocketing unlawfully collected tariffs, or him committing acts of war not sanctioned by Congress. Putting the headlines above the fold does not effect that action, though.

    2. NYT has been careful for a long time to make sure they criticize DJT mostly in terms that he and his supporters would find flattering. It’s the best way to keep everyone happy and not pick any real fights. It’s hard to make this particular story flattering.

    3. And the military is still using those anti-drone lasers. Apparently yesterday they shot down a CBP drone somewhere near El Paso. Along with the aviation safety bill that was just rejected because the Pentagon was against it, it’s hard to feel like this administration actually values the lives of Americans over the idea of military might (though it certainly doesn’t seem to care about military competence. If you want the right to shoot down drones and fly helicopters that don’t transmit their location, you need to earn it by not crashing passenger planes and shooting down your own equipment). I know this is just one more thing in a long list of more egregious things this administration is doing, but it’s also one that’s not getting much attention.

    4. …they reported the story yesterday, and it was definitely on the front page then. I think seeing some conspiracy in the fact that a day old article isn’t at the very top of your app is a little odd.

  4. How careful are you about talking about politics? I try not to if I don’t know every single person in a room but I slipped the other day and made an anti Trump reference in a new group setting.

    1. at work? Very. Focus on the practical impacts of the administration to our business.

    2. Not careful at all. May as well put all the cards on the table. But also I try not to be like my mom and just blather democratic talking points, even though she and I are in political agreement. I stick to “these things are happening and it’s wrong and I have a real problem with people putting their heads in the sand.”

    3. Not very — I’m very happy to expose how odious I find Trump and his cronies to be. That said, I have zero interest in debating or discussing, so I tend not to bring things up and I tend to walk away if someone does.

      1. Same. Silence is complicity. I shut down bigoted MAGA comments when they happen, not debate. I’m a white woman in a rural area. I don’t want anyone to think I’m a safe space for airing that ish.

    4. Very. I dislike hearing people’s opinions on politics. It’s all regurgitated talking points and dull. Even if I agree with them there are a lot of other things I’d prefer to talk about.

      1. This is more or less what I was thinking. What’s the best case scenario for a conversation that includes talking about politics? Odds are it will just be participating in discourse (which undermines any sense of connection and the entire purpose of getting to know people socially) or tribalism.

    5. i saw a cute reel where the girl was talking about how she likes to test new mom friends by slipping in political references. “oh good choice tommy! you could say we’re PRO CHOICE, right?”

      but that’s exactly who I try not to talk politics with… if my kid likes someone i try to get along with the parents. one of my neighbors and i had a weird night a few years ago where she wanted to talk about things and i really really did not because I know she and her husband are both LEOs so I really doubted we’d be aligned on anything, so I just kept saying, let’s not get into politics. We both have disabled kids and I prefer to focus on that bond. but they’re not cops, she’s a US Marshall and he’s Secret Service so I wasn’t sure until a few weeks ago when she posted something on FB that was pro-ICE.

    6. Not at all. I’m a gay millennial woman in a blue area, so it’s pretty obvious where my politics lie (there are of course outliers… but most LGBTQ folks are left of center).

      I also want to know immediately if someone in my circles doesn’t think I deserve equal rights (as either a woman or a gay person).

    7. I am very careful to discuss things of import in terms that are not dog-whistles or otherwise flags.

      I have several colleagues of many years who are die-hard MAGA acolytes. They have no idea I am in the anarchist camp, and that we have had multiple civil discussions of political topics where they actually agree with and support a number of very left-wing ideals. Sometimes I feel like a sleeper agent injecting these ideas into their vernacular in a way that is palatable to them.

    8. 1) Not careful at all, I’m not secretive about my views, but also 2) am naturally not inclined to talk about politics in casual conversation, so I don’t on a regular basis at all. I get a ton out of deeper conversations with some people, don’t get me wrong, but I just don’t want to have talking-points kinds of political chats because they’re boring to me.

    9. Very, because I only think more highly of maybe 5% of people after hearing their political takes. There are a lot of folks who are not living by the old “better to be thought a fool than open your mouth and remove all doubt” adage, and I try not to be one of them.

    10. I’m not careful at all. After being called a snowflake for years I’m *happy* to offend others.

    11. Very. DBF and I went on a Viking river cruise last summer and I know that clientele skews older/conservative. We both studiously avoided the topic of politics, and I was even hesisitant to “out” myself as a Federal employee (this was in the heat of DOGE).

    12. Pretty sure I said “free Luigi” at a work meeting, so not careful at all. That said, I’m in a city and industry greatly impacted by the current dysfunction and slide into authoritarianism, so there’s leeway.

          1. Some people care very deeply about the moral failings of healthcare companies and the people who die because of their profit-seeking decisions. Are you not one of them?

          2. I don’t think murder is ever justified. Who knew that was a minority position!

          4. “Learn nuance” about the concept of murder is wild even for a tr0ll poster.

          5. So when the commenter said “free Luigi” your mind can only conceive of “murder is bad” and not, “what are the multiple failings of our system that leads a person to say this?” This is the actual part that is important, not your knee jerk reaction about murder.

          6. Yes, someone say “free a murderer” made me think about murder. And that’s like saying that I should think about what might drive someone to shoot up their school. It doesn’t matter; it doesn’t justify killing other people.

            Some of y’all never got told “two wrongs don’t make a right” by your parents, and it shows.

          7. I mean, it doesn’t change the end result, but lots of people spend lots of time trying to understand why things happen. Because it does, in fact, matter.

          8. To be clear, of course I think it matters why people do criminal or morally wrong things. But that does not make those things any less criminal or morally wrong. That’s where this person and I seem to differ — her morality allows you to shoot people in the head from behind, and mine doesn’t.

    13. Generally, I don’t bring up national politics and try to avoid getting involved in the discussion, but I feel free to disagree with people who specifically bring it up. I’m a GenX mom in a blue state, so I assume people know he’s not my favorite guy.

    14. With my friends and family? It is always discussed. With my BF? Only if he brings it up. (exception: the Pretti killing; I needed to get to him first on that). At work or with other circles, I generally don’t

      1. I would caution you to not make your BF your husband if you aren’t on the same page politically. That will be a very tough life.

    15. I am careful because I care about people I’m talking to. We don’t talk down to each other even when we stridently disagree (and about half of my friends aren’t on the same side of the aisle).

    16. One advantage of being in the Bay Area is that I can be pretty sure most people agree with me. I don’t talk about politics with strangers but absolutely with people I’m friends/friendly with. And I don’t self censor at all in that group.

      1. It sounds like other people are probably the ones self-censoring around you unless you really are in a bubble of people who all agree (not my impression of the Bay Area!).

      2. Also in the Bay Area. 30% of people, at minimum, are lying to you if you think everyone around you shares your views.

          2. Nope. I’m not friends with people who express bigoted or other values I find immoral. I’m really not.

          3. Do you actually think that the world is divided cleanly into “totally agrees with me” and “bigoted or immoral jerks”? How interesting.

          4. I know that Trump voters like to push back on being shunned but I have been doing that since 2024. I tried to get along starting in 2016 but I can’t do it any more. So yeah, all the shunning. I don’t have secret Trump voter friends. I have Trump voter family members and they’re so in the cult now I don’t know even recognize them anymore. We are at best Facebook friends, and often not even that.

          5. Oh FFS, not everyone who disagrees with you is a Trump supporter. Plenty people in SF don’t vote at all because they are either left of you or are displeased with both parties. There are also plenty of Democrats who align with the party on some but not all issues.

            Your life and friendships sound profoundly shallow if you think the world is “me or Trump voters.”

        2. Yep and this is another reason I don’t discuss politics here. I know what to say, I just don’t always feel like playing liberal gymnastics especially when I disagree with a lot of the left but am in no way MAGA or a trumper.

          1. Yeah, I actually do agree in broad strokes with many Democratic ideals, but I think the way the current party wants to effectuate change in support of those ideals is shortsighted and borderline guaranteed to backfire. I think I have interesting things to say. And there’s no way in hell I’d say them to the person you’re replying to since she just thinks “my views good other views bad.”

    17. Late to this conversation but I’ll play. I don’t talk about politics necessarily, but I am ALL IN on talking about my values…which I believe are now, more than ever, linked to one’s politics. I am so freaking tired of tiptoeing around and getting along to get along. I am an increasingly leftist liberal in a mixed political community and state with many MAGA relatives, whom I love — but I’m also not going to sugar-coat the results of their votes. Color me over it.

      1. Conversations about values and conversations about politics feel less linked than ever to me, and it feels like everybody wants to sugar coat the results.

    18. At work we deal directly with federal, state, and local politics, so that part is discussed openly. Socially I make no secret of the fact that current events in Minnesota have a direct impact on my family.

    19. I think it’s smart to hold your cards close to your chest unless you are with a true friend. People can go ON and ON about politics. Like the floodgates open and will not stop. And most/everything they tell you, you already know.

  5. I need a dress or outfit for a school fundraiser. It’s at a speakeasy style private club under a concert venue. (my sweet little town can be pretty fun). It is Friday night and cocktails. Men will be in jackets no tie. It’s in two weeks and there will still be snow on the ground I think. Help?

    1. I’d go to tuckernuck’s cocktail section and search for dresses with long sleeves. There are plenty of cute celebratory dresses with velvet, sparkles, or other more festive fabrics. I live in MA and find that having one or two ‘winter’ party dresses comes in handy for both Xmas holidays and any other fancy party when it’s still cold out.

    2. Do you have a department store close by? I needed something for a winter wedding and found a really cute velvet dress on deep clearance at my local Dillards.

    3. I don’t spend money on school fundraisers. I’d get a black tulle skirt on Amazon, lots for like $35-30, and pair with a top you like – cashmere sweater, velvet blazer, etc.

        1. It’s honestly my best hack and works for so many things. I have a black one and a cream one and get so much mileage out of both.

      2. Similarly, a silk or satin bias-cut skirt with a soft sweater in a same/similar color is a good option and has a 1920’s silhouette for the speakeasy vibe.

      3. That’s a very smart solution for those events that are dressy but don’t warrant a whole wardrobe update.

    4. if you’re going with girlfriends and want to dress up there are some fun outfits on amazon, search for “20s dress” or flapper dress. but i’d want to make extra sure i wasn’t the only one dressed like that at the party.

  6. My family wants to adopt a puppy in the next few weeks. We are looking at dogs at several different ages but it seems like any puppy or newly adopted young dog needs someone home with them almost 24/7 for the first few weeks at least. We work hybrid but there are 2-3 days a week when we are both out of the house, thanks to jobs requiring specific days in office. Most dogs will not have had all of their shots yet to go to doggy daycare for the first few weeks/months. How do people who work outside the home make this work? Would a dog walker coming by once a day be enough?

    1. This is a great time to interview/vet dog walkers. You’ll likely want to have one or two in rotation anyway – if you get stuck in traffic/are out all day on a weekend/to cover if you’re out late and having a date night/etc.
      For a puppy I’d suggest two or even three daily visits if you’ll be out of the house all day (8-6) – 12/4 or so.

    2. A properly selected young dog should be okay with that scenario, especially if they can get a midday break.

      A puppy would be tough (IMO), which is why I will probably never get a puppy. People manage it with a pen and pee pads, but I personally am not interested in dealing with all of that. I’m sure opinions differ.

    3. Do you have kids? I would strongly consider adopting a young dog from a rescue that does in-home foster. We considered all the options from $4k puppy from a reputable breeder with a 6 month wait list to pulling from a local shelter. We ended up with the World’s Greatest Dog (TM) that we got from a local foster-only rescue. We got him around age 1 and he had been with two foster families (one down south, one in my NE state). He came fully house trained, walked well on a leash, and we knew he was good with kids and other dogs. He’s a chewer but we also had a heads up on that.

      To answer your actual question, you will need to have someone home all the time for a new puppy (8 weeks). It’s like having a baby for a few months. You will not be able to bring your dog to daycare until more like 6 months. You should also think about the next 5 months of your life as you won’t be able to board the puppy either and if you get a dog that’ll take you into summer vacation. When we got our dog, he came with all the necessary shots and could have popped right into dog daycare if needed.

      1. Agree. Please take in a dog that needs a home, not a puppy from a puppy mill or a backyard breeder.

        There are breed specific reaches for all kinds of breeds and they’re not hard to find. Try Facebook if you can’t find via google.

        I have two rescue dogs. There is nothing “wrong” with either of them. One was rehomed because his prior owner just didn’t realize what a lot of work a young, energetic dog would be.

        The second was rehomed because she was abandoned at the vet after her spay surgery and never picked up!

        I got both from the breed rescue and they’ve both become ideal pets with a little love and training.

      2. We are one of the people who got a puppy (with kids) and strongly regretted it. 1000% either foster a dog first OR look into dogs that have spent time in high-quality fosters with a Return Policy. Emphasis on the Return Policy.

    4. oh, and if your kids get home and can let the dog out, then a young adult dog is fine to be home 8-3. For a dog <6 months or so, you'll want a dog walker 2x/day. keep in mind that the dog will need exercise unless you get an out of the box couch potato. We walk ours for a cumulative hour most days, spread into a couple shorter walks.

    5. We’ve always sent ours to daycare right away, the shots issue is overblown and socialization is far more important. You also want to start as you mean to continue. Get the shots, but don’t stop your life in the meantime. Our daycare has puppy staff that work on socializing too so it’s been seamless. It’s pricey but worth it and you’ll want a support system.

        1. Very true, but some obviously do and it’s worth checking into. We’ve done adult rescue dogs and breeder dogs and far prefer breeder, raising from puppyhood. The early stage is tough but worth it.

      2. I am going to disagree as someone with a friend whose puppy got parvo. It may not happen often, but when it does it is devastating. Her puppy lived after $10K in vet bills but two of its litter mates died.

        OP – I have had several puppies while working full time. I highly recommend crate training, both for the puppy’s safety and socialization and to preserve your furniture. Be sure you teach your children that the crate is the dog’s space and they should never be bothered while in their crate.

        You are going to need a dog walker to come by (probably twice a day at first) on the days you are out all day. Once mine were past the puppy phase, they had free access to the outside because I have a fenced yard and a dog door, but even then, I had a dog walker daily until the pandemic.

        1. To be fair though, good breeders have done most of the parvo vaccine series before the puppy goes home.

    6. When you say puppy, what specific age are you talking about? If you’re talking about a very young puppy that isn’t fully potty trained or vaccinated then no, you really can’t be gone from the house for a workday. A dog walker wouldn’t be enough. Puppy will need to be let out at first every 30 minutes – 1 hr, increasing the length of time with age. To effectively potty train, you really have to watch them like hawks and respond immediately. This stage can last until 5-6 months of age easily. Even at 5 months – 9 months or so, you’re still dealing with a puppy that needs lots of guidance and supervision and if left unattended (or uncrated) can be dangerously destructive. Every dog is different but I would really hesitate to get a dog younger than a year in your scenario.

      1. We’re looking at a variety of ages but several of my friends have adopted dogs from 2 months to 2 years, and none were potty trained. All of these friends had one adult who wasn’t working or working part time from home.

        I have been looking for months at the pages of rescues that my friends have used and every single dog in our area is either young and not potty trained or has behavioral issues requiring “experienced dog owners” which is not us (we’ve only had cats as adults). There are also “working breeds” available and we would not be able to meet the needs of such a dog. I think if we could get through the first 6 months, we would be a great family for a dog, so I’m just trying to figure out how other families have managed this.

        1. Can you look at rehomes not rescues? Those dogs should be well adjusted, well trained, and well socialized.

        2. Good for you for recognizing your limits. I have a working breed and she’s wonderful, but she’s a lot. I’m not a first time dog owner but she’s my first dog as an adult and I am so glad I had previous dog experience and previous breed experience. Woe betide owners who get working breeds without being prepared. I digress. I got my girl as a 12 week old puppy in 2020, and even with two adults working from home, it was a lot. They are just a ton of work. I still think you’d be best off with a dog 1+ year, or maybe even as young as 7-8 months if you had a good pet sitter who could come more than once a day. Even if the dog isn’t fully potty trained at that age, you won’t have to take them out as often because their older and their bladders are bigger. That’s the rub with really young puppies – they physically can’t hold it long enough. I also highly recommend crate training. It’s a great way to keep a young dog safe when you’re out of the house, and it helps with potty training. They can go longer between potty breaks in their crates.

    7. I think most people who work full-time outside the home adopt potty-trained adult dogs, not puppies. If the dog is not a puppy it shouldn’t need someone home constantly. Puppies are a TON of work.

      1. I worked outside the home full-time and have had several puppies. My parents both worked outside the home full-time and had several puppies. This is not that difficult; it just requires planning, persistence with training, and a willingness to pay for a dog sitter/walker for the first few months.

        Caveat that I have a fenced yard and dog door, which definitely makes it easier once you are past the chewing/potty training phase.

    8. We adopted an adult dog for this reason. We could not swing the time needed for a puppy.

    9. I adopted a 3-month old puppy and I worked 5 days a week in office with long days. I set up a puppy pen in my living room with pee pads and hired a dog walker to come twice a day until the puppy was old enough to get by with once a day. Then I got a doggie door and it was no issue at all. I also foster a lot of small puppies and if I need to go into the office I put them in a pen with a pee pad and they’re fine when I get home at the end of the day. Having a small puppy is more difficult than an older puppy or a dog, but it’s still totally doable with some resources and planning. Please don’t let that stop you from adopting the dog or puppy you want!

  7. My evening screen time use has gotten out of control. The issue isn’t that I don’t have hobbies or even things to do. It’s that I have zero brain power by the time I’ve been at work all day, taken a kid to an activity, and done a few things around the house. Now picking up my phone is my default activity for “me time” because it requires nothing from me. Even my DH has noticed, which tells me that I should probably reign it in a bit. Help. I override screen-time limits every time.

    1. can you get out for a walk? I am exactly like you, but when I catch myself, I take the dog for a walk and feel a million times better.

      Can you read? I am super guilty of reading via the kindle app on my phone but when I do, I gather a kid or two and we have reading time (electronic or paper).

      1. Once spring hits, getting out for a walk will be easier. Unless the walk happens by 6:30 or so, it’s dark. The sad thing is, I’m a reader! But for whatever reason, it has been relegated to a weekend activity when I have more time and head space.

        1. That was me and I live in the frozen dark north. I walk with a flashlight and cramp-ons.

        2. Read worse books during the week :). I literally am rereading Gossip Girl on my Kindle right now. Who cares? At least I’m reading.

          1. +1! I am usually reading a couple books at the same time. The fluffier one is read on my phone or when I only have a few minutes to spare.

    2. Is there anything that consumes equally little brain power? (Physical magazines or library books? Putting something on the TV that you don’t mind having on for the whole room?)

      Is it really that the phone requires nothing from you, or is it more of the dopamine hit?

      1. Probably a little of both. I used to read a lot more magazines; I should try to get back to that.

      2. Reading is my biggest hobby and I have an easier time reading library books if I’m in a rut because if I only read a few chapters/DNF it was free and doesn’t matter!
        Alternately, what about word games? You may also want to call a friend/family member during your ‘do things around the house time’. If that’s too onerous I’ll just pop my earbuds in and listen to music or a podcast, that usually gives me more energy vs. doom scrolling.

      3. Saying more about TV… I grew up in a no TV household, so it’s sometimes counterintuitive to me to switch from the little screen to the big screen as an upgrade, when TV was the screen everyone was worried about when I was young. But to me it really can feel like a substantial upgrade, especially it’s something live and social (the Winter Olympics!), or if I’m making progress through something I want to finish (if it’s a scripted show or a documentary). We like to put something on in a language we don’t know with subtitles so that it’s less distracting if anyone is doing other things in the room and not watching. It’s more of a winter thing since it’s dark and cold, and it’s kind of nice to have something to look forward to that is passive and relaxing. And it’s genuinely better for my attention span than scrolling.

        2. Yes, I’m leveraging TV for this to some success. The subtitles suggestion is a good one. I also preemptively leave my phone in another room so picking it up would require me to drag myself off the couch.

          2. (Though phone in another room is better! But sometimes we are expected to be semi available on Slack, which is a whole other issue.)

        1. oh yeah. I can be guilty of this myself. tbh I should just put the phone down and go to bed.

        2. Try a game. I like Balatro. And all the NYT puzzles.

          I don’t make a huge distinction between doing stuff on my phone/tv/kindle/computer. They’re all screens. I’m clearly not a Phones Are Evil person. I would wager a number of people posting here are doing so from their phones, as am I.

          But if you’re finding yourself doom scrolling, yeah, try something different.

          I walk and read too, but once it’s dark and I don’t want to watch TV (just don’t always reach for the remote) I have no issue settling down with my puzzle games.

        3. I was like this with instagram after I put the kids to bed at night. An hour would go by just scrolling. I tried reading, audiobooks, tv but the only thing that worked was deleting the app.

    4. Just go to bed, you’re tired. When I get like this, a few days or a week of very early bedtimes and I feel better enough that I can read or do a hobby after work. I will literally just go to bed at 8:30 or 9. Maybe take a long relaxing shower or bath beforehand.

    5. Read a book instead and if you find that you really are feeling too drained to do that, then go to bed.

    6. If you don’t want to go out for a walk…go somewhere. Grocery run, browse TJ Maxx, whatever. Or find an in-home hobby.

    7. If you think it’d help, there are specific screen time apps that are *much* harder to override – like one that requires a confirmation code from another person.

      For me, just not having my phone visible or on my person at home is key. It goes in its charging spot.

      Ymmv but I also find grey scale helpful

      1. Agree with all this. Grayscale makes my phone so much less appealing. I also use Brick which helps. If I have to physically get up to override the screen time limit I’m far less likely to do it

    8. You’ve gotten some good advice here, but I wanted to suggest that you deal with the late-night burnout earlier in the day: make sure you get exercise during the day (even a mid-day walk will do). Take work breaks and get some quiet, even just for a little bit.

      And then it sounds like you might have to go to extreme measures with your phone at night, like giving it to your husband to hide (and before everyone comes at me for that, all I mean is that there’s data suggesting the near-impossibility of breaking screenhabits when the device is available, even if it’s “put away.” So I’m just thinking of options that take that into account.)

      1. +1 I’d also suggest getting really, really clear on what your individual patterns are. I don’t have much trouble breaking away from screen time early in the evening, but the transition to setting down the screen and getting up to do my bedtime routine is really, really hard. My brain just doesn’t want to quit scrolling, even though I know i”m getting decreasing enjoyment or benefit; I’m locked into the motion of it. I’ve had to learn that the later in the evening it gets, the more numbing and deadly my scrolling gets.

    9. Same, and then I realized during a recent weekly screentime summary that I don’t want to be a person who spends 6+ hours a day doom scrolling. I want to be a person who enjoys a few minutes of hobby A, a few of hobby B, keeps on top of my chores, gets in a few minutes of sun before it sets, plays board games with my spouse, works out regularly. I decided 2 hours of phone use a day is enough, and that 30 minutes each of reddit and insta are enough. I only access them through the browser, no apps. I’ve done this in the past and it didn’t work, but somehow it has stuck this time.

      I do listen to a lot of history and science podcasts while doing chores and that scratches my itch for information input without being screentime.

    10. If someone put a gun to your head or your husband’s head, you would be able to fix this. What steps would you take to do so?

      I realize this is a dramatic question, but it has helped me get clarity when I was stuck several times now.

    11. I drastically cut down my phone use this year and am super proud of it! Inspired by people who actually switch to dumbphones, I completely changed the way I have my phone setup and it’s genuinely helped a lot. Basically, I wanted my phone to stop being the “fun screen” and be more like a utility.

      Here’s what I suggest:
      – Change the screen to black and white. It’s ridiculous but no more shiny red notification badges really makes a difference. Also, when I open my phone and it’s black and white, it’s a very obvious cue to myself: you’re supposed to be using this less.
      – Remove FaceID to unlock your phone. Forcing myself to type my password every time is just annoying enough to make me unlock it slightly less.
      – Remove every app that’s not 100% necessary. For me this wasn’t just social media, but was also things like kindle and roku remote. I even disabled safari. My reasoning was that I wanted fewer reasons to pick up/unlock my phone at all, because that’s fewer chances to get sucked in.

      Like any addiction the first few days are super uncomfortable, but after that I truly feel like my brain turned back on.

    12. I recommend getting a Brick. They’re cheap, easy to use and effective. Then find a book. That combo – brick + book – is when I’m on my phone the least.

    13. I uninstalled every app and blocked websites (reddit/IG) that I dont want to visit. I use my husbands phone if I want to look something up on reddit.
      I text my friends when I would scroll, that way I don’t feel like I’m “losing” the social interaction of IG.
      I joined a Patreon/Substack/Discord with an active chat and some people I know in real life.
      My phone is “not fun” now, if I have the urge I come here lol and lift a weight. In bed I read and put my phone out of reach.
      Good luck. Go cold turkey.

  8. I was just invited to a fundraiser next Friday/a week from today. The dress code is described as “Cocktail Glamour. Rich textures and refined silhouettes, velvet, satin, silk, tailored suits, and elevated evening wear. Channel the allure of a modern jazz lounge.” The invite includes images of women in floor length gowns, golds, deep reds, rich jewel tones, sequin, velvet, silk even…

    HELPPP. Size 8/10, 5’8″. The venue itself isn’t all that fancy but it’s being totally dressed up I’m told. Oh and there’s like 3 feet of snow on the ground.

    What will get to me on time? I have a RTR subscription but I’m not due for a new one until 3/4 and the event is 3/7. Sometimes the come quickly but I can’t bank on that.

    1. If money were no object i would wear a velvet tuxedo in a great color. it’s a fundraiser on a friday which means people will be wearing lots of things. i think depending on what you own you could wear a cocktail dress or a black suit with something shiny and pretty beneath. i mentioned this yesterday in a quince post but i’m a fan of a satin skirt and a cashmere sweater in the same color.

    2. I feel like we aren’t supposed to wear velvet after Valentine’s Day (even though I have). Winter dresses should be on deep discount this weekend if you can get into a store.

        1. Oooh I like this one, too:

          Black Velvet One Shoulder Araminta Jumpsuit

          Never would have thought to look at Tnuck. thank you for pointing me in that direction! $15 for 2-day shipping, too!

        2. Yes, especially with fun accessories! If possible, I’d go with the red or green, the black is more classic but (imho) a bit boring.

    4. If I had to shop my closet, I’d wear black satin drawstring pants, velvet mules, a silky cami, and a velvet blazer over my shoulders.

    5. In your place, I would add an item onto my RTR subscription. It would be cheaper than buying something new unless you go with someone really cheaply made.

    6. I recently went to an event with a similar dress code and I wore a metallic gold skirt, black velvet top, and a black velvet jacket that was featured on here recently. And the skirt was long so I wore my black suede waterproof boots because it was cold and rainy.

      You could get similar pieces at Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=gold+metallic+midi+skirt&crid=2XP0CGR1LMFEE&sprefix=gold+metallic+midiskirt%2Caps%2C287&ref=nb_sb_noss_2

      https://www.amazon.com/Womens-Velvet-Blouse-Sleeve-Dressy/dp/B0G64MXNJF/ref=sr_1_17?

      The exact jacket is on Zappos and they have fast shipping: https://www.zappos.com/p/womens-sanctuary-quilted-velvet-jacket-black-1/product/9996769/color/125647?

    7. Do attendees generally give thousands of dollars at this event? I just hate the idea of people spending hundreds of dollars on clothes and accessories to give hundreds of dollars to charity.

  9. This sweater is literally an exact copy of a sweater that Anthropologie sold last year– the the point that I think some of these stock photos are from Anthro.

    1. Right–I was like, this looks like a really good sweater! Except it’s frugal Friday, so it can’t be.

    2. And Anthropologie no doubt stole it from a smaller designer. And so it goes.

  10. adorable in pictures but i am not ordering clothes from amazon anymore. have fallen for the instagram posts a few times and the quality is just hideous.

    1. Same. I have unfollowed so many influencer types because literally half the things they peddle (or more) are from Amazon. Nah. Not spending my clothing budget that way.

      1. +1. Belle at Cap Hill Style has recommended Amazon pieces a few times. The one top I bought was thin, weirdly short, and felt like it was going to fall apart if I washed it. Never again.

        1. Don’t shop at Amazon if you can help it. Don’t follow Belle either. Both abhorrent ethically.

      2. Just fyi instagram is layering a shopping button on top of influencer content without their permission that they can’t stop. There’s a lot that’s been written about this as they’re furious.

        1. I’m thinking of people like Julia Berolzheimer who clearly wear $$$$ designer pieces IRL and then occasionally have 10 million Stories linking Amazon products on purpose. Girl, no one thinks you’re actually buying that stuff.

          1. She’s actually written about the instagram theft of her likeness to shill Amazon. It’s not her recommendations.

          2. I know she’s written about the issue with the Insta automatic links. She also posts “Amazon faves” intentionally, labeled as such in her images, weekly or so.

    2. +1, the piece might look ok when it arrives, but the minute you try to launder it… the fabric and assembly quality becomes appallingly obvious.

    3. So I have this (from Amazon) and have laundered it and worn it a couple times and it looks good still. It’s soft and warm, but I feel like I will be able to wear into mid-spring here in the mid-Atlantic. I’m usually disappointed by Amazon offerings, but this one is actually pretty good.

    4. Counter that I have bought some work horses on Amazon. It takes care in looking at the reviews and fabric content but there are some great items there. (See e.g. the recommendation for a tulle skirt in the thread above; I also get all my white cotton t-shirts to wear under sweaters from their Basics line.)

    5. Okay, I just recommended the need-gala-outfit-in-a-hurry poster check out Amazon. I think it’s fine for emergencies because, as others have said, the quality problems generally emerge upon launderin.

      That said, I have some fleece-lined yoga pants from there that I have lived in for two winters now and they’ve held up great.

    6. I’ve been really pleased with all of my Amazon Essentials pieces. They’re basically Target/old navy quality. I haven’t had to send any back. But I’m mainly just buying hoodies and tees, and now I like their high waisted wide leg chino type pants.

      My stuff is all basically weekend wear (I wfh so that’s most of my wardrobe.) I don’t make a big distinction between buying from Amazon or any other large chain store. It’s all the same.

    7. I gotten some really excellent workout items from there. I don’t think I’d buy day-to-day clothes.

    8. The quality roulette aside, I’ve decided I don’t want to voluntarily give money to a company that directly enriches an oligarch and that creates an ecosystem of modern day serfdom.

  11. Reaching out to this well traveled group-I’m heading to Reims, France and will have about a day to explore in between meetings. I drink but not a lot and am more into history. Does anyone have recommendations on a private guide? things to do? this is a (welcome) surprise work trip.

    1. The large Champagne houses have tours that you can (and should – they sell out) book online – like Veuve Cliquot is there, Mumm, Taittinger. No need for a private guide if you want to go that way. Before or after, tour the lovely and (I think now restored) Reims cathedral.

    2. I highly recommend reaching out to Instants tours. They were fantastic for a day trip to Reims a friend and I took from Paris recently. The guide was wonderful and while we focused on champagne houses, they also provided a stop at the cathedral (with commentary from the guide) and lunch recommendations. Can’t recommend them enough.

    3. The cathedral tour with outside/on the top was pretty cool! It’s very historic.

      We did a bit of touristing there (back in 2019) but had a good time taking the train to Epernee and visiting some champagne places there, also.

    4. It sounds like you do not need transport from Paris but it is an easy train ride if you do.

      I second the recommendations for the cathedral and one of the Champagne houses. Their tours are amazing, even if you do not drink much. I enjoyed both the Tattinger and Pommery tours (the latter sometimes has cool art exhibits). Also, the visitor center in Rheims (near the cathedral) is very helpful if you have questions. I missed my scheduled champagne tour because of weather, and they were able to find me a replacement at the last minute.

  12. Has anyone here been to Basel, Switerland? I have 1.5 days/two nights there and would love any suggestions. I’m wide open (hiking, museums, etc.), but it would be in Basel specifically — I’m taking trains elsewhere afterward.

    1. Yes, I’ve been there multiple times on business.

      Museums: Museum Tinguely is interesting and different. Other than that one, I enjoyed the toy museum (so many old toys and interesting special exhibitions), as well as the Kunsthalle and Kunstmuseum. I believe there is a museum pass.

      Just walking along the river has been enjoyable as well, and if the weather allows, having an apero at one of the riverside bars.

  13. Any non-theme park recommendations for Orlando? We are going on a Disney cruise for a spring break, but we are spending a few days in Orlando beforehand to enjoy the warmth.

    We are big theme park people, so I am an expert on those options.

    2. YMMV but I thoroughly enjoyed the lazy river at the Hilton Orlando nearish to the convention center. I could lazy river all day.

    3. The Winter Park scenic boat tour is nice.

      I would consider spending the time in the Space Coast area instead, though. Visit the Kennedy Space Center, see a rocket launch if one is happening, take surfing lessons at School of Surf, see the manatees at Manatee Sanctuary Park, and take a guided kayak tour in the ocean or on the Banana River.

  14. Friend A, B, and I have been friends for over 15 years. Friend A and I always remember the others’ birthday, but in the last couple of years, Friend B has forgotten our birthdays. Friend A wants to tell Friend B that it hurts her feelings although she acknowledges that Friend B is a good friend overall. Would not receiving birthday wishes from a long-time friend bother you?

    1. OMG no
      If you have been friends for a long time, you may be at the stage of life where sh*t takes over and unless you’re having an event or FB reminds you, I think it’s best to give grace and go on. Too many people wish they had good friends, that I feel that the friend needs to grow and acknowledge that her love language isn’t the same as it is for the friend and neither way is wrong. If I remember in September that a friend’s birthday was in August, I may feel too stupid to mention or embarassed if someone else brings it up.

      1. +1

        Now that my friends and I are in our 40s, it’s 50/50 whether we remember to wish each other a happy birthday on the actual day. There is too much else going on in our lives.

      2. yep. half the time i don’t know what day or date it is, but also to know that it’s your birthday on top of that is a lot. i have my systems (like writing things on calendars) but otherwise no clue.

        my last birthday i felt a bit bummed that one girlfriend didn’t text considering her husband’s birthday is the next day… but whatcha gonna do.

    2. No. I have very low expectations for any friends to remember my birthday at this age and stage of our lives. Everyone is so busy with work, kids, etc. I just cut everyone a lot of slack on things like this. I am not the center of their world anymore, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t still good friends.

      Upside is that its so lovely when many of them do remember to wish me a happy birthday!

    3. It truly wouldn’t. There are some people who are good at remembering birthdays, and some who are not, and in my experience there is zero correlation with how good they are as friends otherwise.

    4. Friend A should say nothing. In your shoes I’d text Friend B on A’s birthday and say ‘hey reminder to wish A happy bday, you know how she loves that.’

        2. +1 this is what I do
          I would want to know if a good friend felt hurt that her birthday was passed over! This is something I can easily solve with a calendar reminder, and if I can easily do something that maybe isn’t my “love language” but takes 30 seconds and matters to someone who matters to me… why wouldn’t I?

          If this is devolving into some giant birthday drama, that’s a different problem

    5. For the love of, absolutely not. I say this as a person who loves my birthday too. If you want your birthday celebrated and acknowledged it’s on you to tell people that it’s your birthday, throw a party, whatever. But if people forget and miss it, good lord, so what. The only person you get to be mad at is a spouse.

    6. It would not bother me to not receive birthday wishes from a long-time friend, but I would be sad not to receive wishes from most of my friends. Is that the case with Friend A at all?

      If I did something to hurt a good friend that could be easily remedied, I would want to know in an non-dramatic and non-confrontational way. “Hey, I really appreciate hearing from you on my birthday because it really cheers me up / feels special. I was bummed I didn’t hear from you this year.”

      1. This is only remedied if you also then send her a recurring yearly calendar reminder. Otherwise you’re just stressing her out over something that is not the biggest piece of your relationship.

    7. I am bad at remembering birthdays, so I’m glad none of my friends have dumped me over it. I’ve gotten better because of two things: other friends reminded me that it was someone’s birthday, and I started putting them into my phone contacts with calendar reminders. Maybe you can remind Friend B when it’s Friend A’s birthday?

    8. I am very dedicated to celebrating my birthday and those of my friends. I actually still send birthday cards to friends! With that said, neither you nor Friend A should tell Friend B that Friend B not remembering a birthday is hurtful, and Friend A needs to just accept that this is the price of admission to being Friend B’s friend and learn not to be hurt by it. If Friend B is objectively a good friend overall, then keep her and look for birthday wishes from other people in life.

    9. So Friend A is gossiping to you about Friend B over something most adults would shrug off if they noticed it at all. I wonder what she’s saying to Friend B about you.

      1. Ehh this is pretty mundane “gossip”. If I were OP, I wouldn’t spend any energy wondering what this friend is saying to Friend B about her.

        1. I mean, I don’t talk negatively about my friends behind their backs, full stop. But glad you think it’s ok.

          2. You should be capable of navigating someone not wishing you a happy birthday without needing input from others by age, like, 25

    10. Back in the day before the interwebs were keeping track of all this stuff, nobody knew anybody’s birthday (except your nearest and dearest relatives and maybe Hilda in HR, who may or may not have organized monthly office birthday parties). I feel like those were simpler, easier times.

      TL;DR no, it would not bother me.

        1. Thanks for everyone else’s responses.
          We are in our 40s and I am not the one with the issue–my friend is. Since it does not bother me in the grand scheme of things, I was curious what others thought.

  15. Do 50-50 cotton modal t-shirts tend to shrink or stretch? The internet says shrink, but I have shirts that I thought were cotton modal that stretched. I’m trying to decide whether to keep shirts that are a hair snug or exchange for a larger size.

    1. Depends on whether it’s a woven or knit fabric.

      Woven viscose family fabrics shrink, so a modal and cotton blend might.

      Jersey viscose fabric can sometimes be cut cheaply – randomly half on the bias etc. and then they loose shape and stretch weirdly when you wash them.

      1. Just curious, how do you know this? Do you sew? And how would I know whether it’s woven or knit and which way the bias is? (Not the OP.) I have some very limited sewing experience with quilting cottons, but I want to learn more about high-quality fabrics so I can start investing in durable items.

        1. I do sew, but I know this from paying attention to clothes when I wash them.

          Simplified:
          Knit fabrics are made from thread connected by little loops, and have lots of stretch from these «waves».

          Woven fabrics are made from threads packed in a grid with horisontal threads and vertical threads. This fabric can be very stiff, unless the threads themselves have some elastic.

          On the bias is at an angle to the horisontal threads, and at a 45 degree angle woven fabrics will have stretch and drape they don’t have laid out straight. You can test this on your quilter’s cotton, try pulling the fabric at an angle.

          Fabric for clothes are generally cut in the same direction for the whole garment, with the horizontal lines as guideline. This ensures that the fabric pieces behaves in the same way and have the same level of drape. This means that you get odds and ends of wasted fabric when the pieces are cut.

          Cheap fast fashion often cut haphazardly on the bias or half bias to use all the fabric, and this means you might have half a tee or a sleeve with a different drape. This is why cheap tees can look crooked with the seem lines at odd angles.

          Clothes can be made on the bias on purpose, like 1930ies satin bodying dresses that skim your curves. The can also have small pieces cut on the bias on purpose to use their drape on purpose, like the undercollar on a high end jacket or shirt.

  16. extremely low stakes question: what’s your preferred pen color?

    i’m blue all the way, cannot function with red or black. but couldn’t resist buying some purple G2s when I was at the store this morning.

    4. Purple is my preferred! I use the Uni Jetstream after a Reddit rabbit hole led me to it. I’m currently using black ink because I started a new job with limited subject matter experience, and I worried that purple ink might emphasize my junior-ness. I fear being Elle Woods with her scented resume, hah.

    5. I color code everything, so blue/black/red/green/pink/purple/orange/pale blue G2s. The only one I don’t really use is the yellow.

    6. Green and purple if I am marking something up
      Brown for notetaking
      Blue for signatures

    7. Dark green if I can find it. I have some fine nib G2 in this color but they’re harder to find now and I hoard the ones I do have.

      1. There is a very dark blue G2 that I adore – in the past I have bought boxes of them on Amazon, not sure what I will do when they run out…

    8. Blue. Got yelled at by the passport office lady when I accidentally used a blue pen on a form. But still worth it.

    9. Blue or turquoise Pentel Energel 0.7 tip always.
      Red or pink for action items. Black if I have no other color available.

      I’m picky and will not compromise on pens any more.

    11. Black Pilot fine line felt tip or Staedtler fine line tritip or regular HB pencil for writing.

      Blue fine line for signatures.

      Red fine line for editing or corrections.

      Staedtler tritip, pencils or brush pens for colour writing.

      Yellow, pink and green neon highlighters.

    13. Hot pink ultra fine for everyday notes.

      Green for marking up.

      Blue for signatures.

      Black if all others are lost.

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