Coffee Break: Piper Top Handle Saffiano Leather Tote

102 Comments

1. A former co-worker/friend is having her second baby soon. I was thinking of getting a group together for a “sprinkle.” It would be a mix of current/former co-workers, probably 5-7 people.

   I’d like to do a nice brunch or lunch at a restaurant, but is it tacky to coordinate something like this and then have everyone pay their own way (except the guest of honor)? I feel like it is, but thought I’d get some feedback from the hive.

   1. I’ve gone to this. I had no problem at all with paying my way. It wasn’t tacky, it was awesome and we also banded together to get her a gift card from all of us and a couple new ‘special’ things.

      I was just happy that someone else organized it.

   2. I’d totally be on board with this as a guest! I think it’s nice of you to offer!

      Slight deviation — I’m attending a “sprinkle” that appears to be essentially a full-fledged shower. I know the mom didn’t want a fuss, but the hostesses had her register (again). Most of the registry is diapers, bottles, etc. because there will be plenty of hand-me-downs from big sis to little sis. Suggestions for gifts? I’d like to do something for big sis (2yo) and baby.

      1. I like to do personalized things – usually beach towels or bath towels. Royal Nursery also has soft bunnies and fabulous blankets that you can have personalized.

      2. I like to give board books for second babies. Enjoyed now by the older sibling and probably replaces some books that got destroyed when the oldest was a baby. Ones with flaps or touchy feel bits are always a hit.

   3. I think it’s tacky. I think sprinkles are tacky to begin with and paying my own way to attend one, and the guest of honors and a gift? No. If we are a group that regularly brunches awesome. Let’s brunch. And I might even bring the baby a gift. But not a sprinkle.

      1. I only like these things if the new baby is a surprise and Mom gave away all of her old baby gear, or round two happens to be twins, or some other need-based reason.

      2. I like the idea of a no-gift celebratory lunch/brunch. I hate the name “sprinkle.” I just hate it. I also hate “babymoon” and “push present.” Anyway, just thought I’d say it.

         1. add: gender reveal parties.

            1. Oh good gracious, yes. All of these terms, to me, just reek of materialism and a “me-centric” attitude. I also hate “gift” as a verb but I realize that may be less universal.

         2. Me, too.

         3. Yes! All of these are completely horrible.

   4. I don’t think it’s tacky to have people pay their own way but please collect the money ahead of time; I personally hate hate hate when it takes 20 minutes to pay the bill because everyone whipping out the calculators and scrounging around for debit card/credit card/ cash/ exact change… and there are people who don’t want to split evenly and others who do…. It also will make it very awkward for guest of honor to have to hear/watch everyone figure out their exact share for her meal and how to get that extra $9.87 charged on their cards, plus tip….

      So I suggest you figure out a reasonable price related to menu at the restaurant you are going to ($25 per person including tip to cover their own meal and guest of honor meal?). Have each person pay you that amount ahead of time, and discreetly take care of the bill yourself when it comes. If it’s excessively higher than anticipated, quietly pull people aside later to see if they can chip in – try to select the people who had 5 cocktails…

      And set a price limit on the gifts roughly equal to the meal price.

      ALSO- this works best of all the people invited are friends, and this is something you guys are doing together as a gift for mom-to-be.

      1. This might be another one of these regional differences, but it’s rare for a restaurant in my area (NC) to require one check for a group. Is that not the case elsewhere? Split checks/individual checks are the standard way of handling that issue here.

         1. You wouldn’t want to split checks if you’re covering the mom.

            1. Eh, just agree ahead of time to split it evenly among the paying guests. 8 people attending, including the mom to be? Ask the host ahead of time if they can just split it evenly into 7 checks. I usually just deal with this stuff when I’m making the group reservation. Even if the restaurant policy is more rigid (and it certainly is in my PNW anti-service city), they are usually a bit more flexible when you work it out ahead of time. If they still won’t do it, just go to a place that will.

         2. It’s a regional thing. Or at least, it’s a NYC vs. everywhere else thing. Restaurants in NYC will almost never split checks. Sometimes you can convince them to split the total evenly, but definitely not by individual items. This doesn’t seem to be a problem anywhere else I’ve lived.

            1. This surprises me every time I see it mentioned somewhere. I can’t imagine any restaurant in my area not splitting a bill (unless it was maybe some complete mom and pop tiny tiny place). It makes me feel like the south is so much more advanced!

               I would not ask the other diners to pony up for the mom – treat her, and if anyone else offers to contribute, accept it gracefully. I also would probably present it as a get-together to honor the mom, rather than a sprinkle, maybe with informally mentioning that you plan to get her something and others are welcome to as well.

            2. Chicago is the same lately, at the very least you get a GIANT eye roll when you ask to have it split.

            3. Uh, where in NYC? Literally every time I go out with my friends they split our check.

         3. This may be a silly question, but when you talk about split checks, are you talking about the restaurant issuing several different checks to one table? Or about one check being paid with several different credit cards and maybe some cash?

            I’ve rarely asked for the former, but never had a problem having the check split anytime I’ve asked, usually either 2 ways or 3 ways. As to the latter, I used to frequently go out with groups where we’d get one check but each pay our own way and often give several different credit cards either with instructions to split evenly between all cards or with a list of how much to put on each card. Only once have I had a restaurant say they limit payment to no more than 2 credit cards.

            1. In my case, I should clarify that I was asking about why each person can’t receive their own separate check tied to their own order, not about splitting one big check equally in many directions. I’m interested to see that it’s different regionally because I worked in many restaurants in my day and they always had the capability to provide separate checks. It was a software capability that tied a seat or seats to a bill with no extra legwork from the server. They could even take it a step further and equally split one bill into all of the rest, just like this situation requires. Very fascinating to know there are regional differences, though!

            2. I’m in TX and what you describe is pretty common here.

      2. This is why prix-fixe menus are great for celebratory lunches/brunches. And I agree with collecting money ahead of time. Many restaurants will put together a menu with several choices for a large group.

   5. I vote tacky- I don’t see this as any different than a pay your own way shower, which I think most people would agree is tacky. I wouldn’t call it a sprinkle- just call it a brunch.

   6. Agreed. If you have five friends who you think would be interested, just shoot an email and see if they are down to all take out your friend before the baby arrives. But calling it a sprinkle and then having people pay their own way would be tacky.

2. Anyone here have a DIY method of cleaning their diamond engagement ring? Mine is all icky and scrubbing with water an old toothbrush doesn’t do anything.

   1. This sounds odd but I was soaking clothes in Oxyclean and wearing my ring, and noticed it was much cleaner and sparklier after. Since then I’ve droppped my ring in a cup of hot water and Oxyclean, let it sit for a few minutes, and then used a spray faucet to rinse. Seems to work.

   2. I mix a solution of water and counter top spray and let the ring sit in there for about 30 minutes – swirling occassionally to loosen any gunk. Then I hold the ring in a set of tongs and hold it under the steam spray from my espresso machine. Works like a charm.

      1. This makes sense because my jeweler told me to use Windex and a toothbrush. I regularly (maybe once/year) take it into nice jewelry stores and they are happy to clean it for free. I figure I’ve paid my share of high prices in that industry over the years to take part in some professional courtesy.

         1. I agree with this. If you don’t have a rapport with a reputable jeweler, start. Go in for a cleaning/prong check. Get a watch adjusted. Most jewelers will clean for free, especially if you are a frequent customer. I use the jeweler that built my custom 3-stone ring, and they greet me by name whenever I go in. For what it’s worth–that’s the only jewelry I’ve ever bought there, but we have had some links taken out of my son’s medic alert bracelet, and they’ve taken links out of my Citizen watch.

   3. My Mom swears by Mr. Clean (diluted appropriately).

   4. Hot water and dishwashing liquid.

3. Anyone here have a DIY method of cleaning their diamond engagement ring? Mine is all icky and scrubbing with water and an old toothbrush doesn’t do anything.

   1. I use straight ammonia.

      1. I mix half ammonia with warm water in a shot glass. Remove and brush with a toothbrush, soak again for a sec, then rinse.

         1. This is what my jeweler said to do in between bringing it in to the shop.

   2. Heat water until boiling hot – in a mug. Add a few drops of dish soap, stir until foamy, and then drop in engagement ring. Let it sit for a few minutes (until water is lukewarm), then scrub with a toothbrush.
      Thanks for the reminder mine could use a cleaning!

   3. So this is unconventional, but my dental technician asked to see my ring one day and proceeded to power-clean it with whatever you call that high-powered water squirter that they use to rinse your teeth. It looked AWESOME after that (emerald and diamond).

   4. This reminds me that my engagement ring will be ready any day now (we are engaged already – chose the ring together) and I am SO EXCITED.

      1. I love that you got engaged without the ring and then chose it together!

         1. Thanks! So do we :)

   5. Snack boxes of raisins, individual serving bags of all natural popcorn, mini bags of cashews and almonds from Trader Joe’s, wasabi seaweed from TJ’s

      1. Best misplaced reply ever.

   6. My optician allows me to pop stuff into the ultra-sonic water bath normally used for cleaning glasses, which is what she does with her own jewellery. Caveat that loose stones may be at risk of being dislodged but she says no problems over the years she’s been doing this.

4. What kinds of food do you keep for quick fixes in your office? I’m looking for ideas for when I can’t break away to get lunch and/or don’t pack.

   Currently, I have minute rice, oatmeal, grahams, peanut butter, and a few soups. I sometimes keep granola/cereal bars too.

   1. Do you have access to a fridge? I like a big tub of hummus and some pretzels. I also like to keep cereal and milk.

      1. Yes–fridge & freezer

   2. Unsweetened apple sauce, fruit cups in water, triscuts, fruit leather

   3. Most of the time when I know I won’t be able to get away, I just pick up something on my way in to work. There’s a nice little store right next to the subway so I’ll get one of their prepackaged salads or sandwiches with my morning coffee.

      But if you want something with a longer shelf life for those unexpected days, my ideas would be:
      – tuna packets and crackers/pita chips
      – something frozen to keep in the fridge at work
      – some version of cup o’ noodles (there are “healthier” versions you can get at health food stores/whole foods that have a bit less sodium), Annie Chun also makes pretty edible noodle and soup bowls.

      –

      1. Great Tote, KAT! I am glad to see you are recomending LEATHER, and not the cheep stuff, which I refuse to buy.

         As for the OP’s, here, I agree with AIMS. We have a BIG refrigerator and Pantry at work, and I have stocked all of the thing’s that I have at HOME, includeing all kind’s of Dry Fruit’s and NUT’s, YOGURT, Potatoe Chip’s, Cheeze DOODELS, and Giradelli Dark Chocolate. That way, in case I do NOT want to call out for food, I can eat this between meal’s. The manageing partner let’s me order in if I stay late in the office, even if it onley to BILL. So many times, I decide to bill, and if I stay past 5:45, I am also abel to bill my cleint’s for the meal I get delivered to the firm. The manageing partner says that once it is past 5:30, the neighborhood get’s a littel to quiet (I say SEEDEY), and he does NOT like for me to have to go OUT to get food and then bring it back, or worse yet, eat out then come back after 6. So I just call out and get food DELIVERED! YAY!

         Also, if I call out for food and eat it here, he also let’s me take a car service home, but DAD does not like that b/c I can NOT loose weight if I get a ride. Dad say’s if he finds out I am riding, I will have to work out on the elleiptical at the NYSC for an EXTRA hour! FOOEY!

         So the moral here is to eat good food at the office, and if you have to stay late, eat BETTER FOOD (which can be billed to the cleints) and then get a nice ride home, even if that mean’s haveing to sweat your tuchus off at the NYSC later. So far, I do this about 3 day’s a week. I will have to do this today b/c I ate IN when Dad stopped by. He said he did NOT want to take me away to long from my work (and billeing) b/c the manageing partner needs to get the $ in from the cleint’s BEFORE we moove. YAY!

   4. This is the stuff I keep on hand for if i need a meal (didn’t have time to pack lunch or working through dinner):

      Tinned fish (trout and herring). Jarred vegetables (I like pickled beets, but sometimes crave peas). Jarred stuffed grape leaves. Oatmeal. Dried fruit. Boxed soups.

   5. I usually keep granola bars, almonds, oatmeal and chocolate (which doesn’t last very long).

      I find the almonds to be the best for curbing my hunger without causing me to overindulge.

   6. Nuts, oatmeal, soup, hummus, yogurt, a couple of frozen meals, and I usually bring a handful of apples/oranges to work and leave them in a little fruit bowl I have on my desk.

      Thankfully, my office has a market/restaurant downstairs with a great salad bar and healthy-ish snacks if I need to find myself some dinner.

   7. Cheese slices/sticks, turkey, hummus, lentil soup and minute rice cups, chocolate covered almonds

      1. Also, Trader Joe’s mini beef tacos, quesadillas. Roasted chickpeas.

   8. these are great ideas. Thank you! Bon appetit!

   9. Almonds. They’re great for anytime I’m hungry but don’t have other food at office and don’t have time to leave the office to grab something. They can also be eaten very quickly between meetings, if necessary.

   10. Great ideas – did anyone mention jerky? I keep 80 calorie packs of jerky in my drawer.

   11. I have dates and dried figs and cashews.

5. Has anyone ordered a Meyer lemon tree or something similar as a gift? I usually get my mom flowers for her birthday, which is coming up, but I would rather get her something that will continue to live and that she can use when she cooks. They already have herbs and my father is a pretty avid gardener. I would like it to be something she can keep in the house, is pretty, and won’t kill the cats if they chew on it. She already has orchids. Thanks in advance!!

   1. I think trees make a wonderful gift. We don’t have much of a garden so I got an ornamental lemon tree (indoor) for a recent holiday. I think I’ll get a Meyer lemon tree for my mom for Mother’s Day.

   2. My mother bought us a pair of rose bushes in big pots for our birthdays (a couple weeks apart) a few years ago. The roses are lovely and the pots go with our patio. But she did not ask or tell us in advance. She just texted one day and told us that we needed to be home on X day for a delivery. Um, we both work. Also, who is coming and what are they bringing? What’s the big mystery? It makes me anxious. Definitely ask first! Otherwise, totally great idea.

   3. I gave my mom a little lemon tree. She keeps it in her greenhouse. Not many lemons — just one every now and then, but it’s pretty amusing. It’s a tiny tree with this big lemon hanging off it when she gets one.

      1. Citrus trees are touchingly responsive to being fed – we had them in my office for a few years and in the one year when our maintenance contractor assigned us an enthusiastic user of fertilizer mix, our hitherto barren ornamental trees produced a couple of generous crops.

6. I know you probably won’t come back (or care) but I’d be more likely to check out your website if you just link it in your name and drop the signature and extra link at the end.

   We have a number of regular commenters here who link to their blogs and I think they get pretty good traffic from us by just being interactive commenters and not hitting us over the head with their site.

   1. +1

   2. Agree with this, though the Office Stylist has been posting relevant comments for a while now. :)

      1. I don’t know if I agree with relevant… its pretty much always “I love this pick! What a great pick and color!”

         1. I’ve reported these comments, because it just seems like blog advertisement. I’ll only go to a s!te linked in a commenter’s signature if the comments add to the conversation. These never do.

   3. I agree. It’s screams “look at my blog” to me.

   4. Yes. I am a vlogger and youtube has a built-in spam filter that puts such comments in spam folder.

7. I know you probably won’t come back (or care) but I’d be more likely to check out your stuff if you just link it in your name and drop the signature and extra link at the end.

   We have a number of regular commenters here who link to their blogs and I think they get pretty good traffic from us by just being interactive commenters and not hitting us over the head with their links.

8. Since we’re talking about buying houses, what’s the standard practice for negotiating? Is negotiating the price no longer a thing? Anybody have a favorite “Buying Your First Home For Dummies” style book?

   1. This is 100% market dependent. Where I am (SF), it’s not negotiating down but figuring out how much over to bid. I’d talk to your RE agent for specific advice in your market or post where you are for better advice.

      1. Same in the greater Boston area.

   2. There is actually a “Homebuying for Dummies” book that I found to be helpful…

      Whether you can negotiate the price of a house depends on how popular the place is to buyers. If it’s been sitting on the market for a bit, you can probably be assured that you won’t have to pay sticker. A reputable buyer’s agent can give you a good idea of what the average price per square foot is in similar homes in the area, and you should definitely try to get down to that or below, unless the house has some sort of unique asset (e.g., it’s the only one on the block with a parking space or something).

      As a side note of advice – the entire buying process seemed extremely mysterious to me until we got a fantastic agent that was patient and explained everything. I am not sure I could have figured it all out – or at least, not well – on my own.

   3. In my market, negotiating is absolutely a thing. A thing buyers do by making higher than list offers and increasing the percentage they are paying in cash. If places are lingering on the market you’ll have more room to make a lower initial offer.

   4. Counterpoint to all the ‘you’ll pay wayyy over sticker price’ comments:

      I live in a medium sized, mid-priced Northeastern city. Less than a year and a half ago, I purchased a very nice house in a very desirable neighborhood that was only on the market for a short period of time. They expected us to negotiate on price and acquiesced to $2k over sticker plus significant ($7500) seller paid closing costs (long story, because of the way our mortgage loan worked out, we got a much better deal if we had cash to put into the down payment versus the closing costs).

      I like Zillow and realtor.com for showing local sales along with the pricing history. Look at houses like the one you’d want to buy and do a quick comparative analysis. What have other 3BR/2BA houses in XYZ neighborhood with an updated kitchen sell for? What should you expect to get for your money?

   5. I negotiated on my house in DC last summer. But I’m the only person I know who has bought in the last 4 years in the city who did – everyone else paid over asking. The area I wanted to be in was less popular, it was the hight of summer, and there were a few similar homes in the area (although I liked mine the best). I thought it was a little over priced, so went in at 10k under asking. The seller’s agent came back at 5k under asking and said that was the lowest the seller was willing to go (who knows if that’s true). I took it.

      1. This is my experience. I made an offer on a house that had been sitting for a week without any offers, in a market where every other house was getting multiple offers the day they hit the market. I think the only reason why was because the house smelled like dog (it had all hardwood floors and all dog smells were gone after a good cleaning). I offered $5k under asking with some conditions (include appliances, including extra refrigerator; $5k to closing costs). After the inspection we pushed for another $10k off the price and settled halfway in-between.

         So, even if the market is hot, compare the property you’re looking at to other properties in the area.

   6. In Chicago, my first offer was 12% under the list price in a desirable neighborhood and was accepted without a counter. This was 2013. I think motivating factors were my ability to move fast and the percentage in cash. I know friends buying currently and negotiating is still done around here. Good luck!

      1. Yeah, I think negotiating is definitely still a thing in Chicago. We did sell a home at list price, but several friends have offered under list price successfully, and we did so for our new house.

   7. We’ve bought & sold a few houses over the years, ranging from competing offers to a few days of negotiating at lower than list to making an offer over list and being so happy when our Realtor pushed & got it accepted. It really really depends on the market.

   8. Get a good real estate agent. Even in my market, where houses routinely go a few hundred k over asking, there are times when a lower than asking offer is appropriate.

      1. How can you tell you have a good real estate agent? My SO’s buying a house, and while I’m involved in the decision, it’s not my money, not my call. He signed an agent already, and he’s starting to wonder whether the guy is phoning it in.

         1. Anecdata: I started to worry about my agent when she started showing me one house at a time (instead of trips with 6-7 viewings in a short period of time), when she started taking several days to schedule just 1 showing, when I was seeing 1 house or less per week, when she started pushing me to consider something very different from what I was looking for, when the showings she did schedule for a single property were at times that were extremely inconvenient for me because “that’s all the seller could do”, when she started telling me that nobody likes handling the types of property that I’m looking for because there’s no real money in it given the amount of work (in the context of explaining why other agents were being nonresponsive and unreliable), and when she started sending her obnoxious partner to showings instead of coming herself.

            I had worked with her before and in addition to wonder if she was trying to dump me as a client, I also worried that maybe I had unreasonable expectations about what was possible for showings or for what I’d be able to buy. I wish she would have just come out and said she didn’t want to work with me anymore.

            For perspective, after I finally broke up with her and started working with a different agent, I had 2 different outings lined up in the next 10 days, with about 12 showings per outing, so 2 dozen properties in less than 2 weeks. They were exactly the types of properties I was looking for, and I ended up buying one of them. Most of the places I looked at (including the one I bought) had been listed on the MLS for months, and I had told my previous realtor that I wanted to see them, but she never arranged showings.

         2. Tag along on a few open houses. The bad agents are usually just so full of sh*t. I feel like I have a spidey sense for it at this point, but even if you don’t, I think you can get a good sense by just asking “why do you say that” and “how do you know”… One obvious warning sign for me is extreme pressure – sure, sometimes you have a tough market and you need an agent who’ll warn you to act quick, but other times you can tell it’s B.S. (ex.: we went to see an open house and the agent told us there were three offers and we should submit ours by friday, to which we replied that we were not that interested in the property and really didn’t want to get in a bidding war. Her response: “you will never buy a property then!” My response: “you’re not right for us!”

            Another big red flag to me is unfounded assurances – for instance, you say “I wonder if this wall can come down to open up the kitchen” and without pause the agent says, “oh that’s super easy, you can do that for $1200″… Maybe that’s true, but you should ask how agent knows that. If someone has that response to every flaw you see in each property, I’d question it… I recall more than one property where an agent said that load bearing walls could come down, complicated rewirings were simple, etc. I’m always suspicious of anyone offering quick and simple solutions not supported by evidence.

            I’d put lying about square footage (substantially) and the like in the same category. Obviously, the agent wants to make a sale and that’s fine, and, yes, everyone exaggerates, but when you get a floor plan with dimensions that obviously add up to a lot less than your agent is claiming (say 800 sq ft vs 1200), I say call them on the B.S. and see how they respond. Your agent should be finding a property to meet your needs, not trying to pull a fast one on you.

            And of course the obvious stuff: you want someone responsive who follows up on thins you want to know, returns your calls, addresses your concerns, makes appointments quickly, someone attentive to detail, someone who maximizes your time, notices your likes and dislikes, doesn’t try to waste your time with the obvious no’s, and who will be able to tell you when you’re not being realistic and explain why a particular course of action does/doesn’t make sense.

9. spamtest123

10. Does anyone have recomendations for DC area CPA/tax person? It looks like we are going to get hammered this year (and cannot afford it, but that’s a story for a different day). My DH was an independent contractor for most of the year so I’d like someone that knows all the deductions, etc.

    thanks in advance

    1. I can recommend CHC Works ( http://www.chcworks.com/) way up in Gaithersburg, MD.

       But, there may be one closer into the metroplex.

    2. Linda deMarlor of tax masters in rockville. Tell Linda her old talk show co-host, katherine cole, sent you.

11. I skinned up both knees pretty bad this winter and they are now down to pink/red scabs that hide well under my black tights. Any good drugstore (or derm office) products that can clean up the scars or reduce them? I’m thinking of the vitamin C patches / things for stretch marks / maybe peel pads? I wish hose were back in — I look like I’ve been the loser in a fight and most of my skirts / dresses end just above the knee. :(

    1. Mederma.

    2. Number one advice is to keep it out of the sun!!! I had surgery on my stomach multiple times and had horrible scarring and it was bright red for 3 years. I was really good about only wearing 1 piece swimsuits and now its almost gone. So just don’t risk it in the sun at all.

    3. Bio oil

    4. Vitamin E, which you can get in pure (but sticky) form at Whole $. Use under a band-aid. I used it on a surgical scar that looks amazing now.

12. Has anyone managed to get their career up and running due to a long unplanned interruption such as illness or unemployment etc? How did you get through the difficult times especially when you have no hope and just feel down?

    1. 1. I refused to completely give in to despair, although I had brief spells of bitterness and longer spells of depression. Because I simply _had_ to find employment eventually, I had to keep going.
       2. I “leveraged” non-workplace accomplishments to remind me that if I could sustain a good performance in other areas of life I would eventually do the same professionally.
       3. I took on various volunteer “jobs” and in some cases put them on my resume–not as pretend jobs but as evidence of my staying active and connected during my long spell of not being employed.
       4. It was not easy–especially because while I ended up having a long period of “free time” it was all experienced in a day-by-day sense, which made it impossible to ever commit to a long-range project.

       If I ever have to experience this again, I will still live it one day at a time, but I will try to see each day as a chance to build something bigger. That way, even if I don’t know at the outset how much time I’ll have, I will still be able to assemble something significant.

       Stay strong! Eventually there IS a light at the end of the tunnel, and it won’t be the headlight of an oncoming train.

    2. 1. I refused to completely give in to despair, although I had brief spells of bitterness and longer spells of depression. Because I simply _had_ to find employment eventually, I had to keep going.
       2. I “leveraged” non-workplace accomplishments to remind me that if I could sustain a good performance in other areas of life I would eventually do the same professionally.
       3. I took on various volunteer “jobs” and in some cases put them on my resume–not as pretend employment but as evidence of my staying active and connected during my long spell of not being employed.
       4. Although I ended up having a long period of “free time” I didn’t realize this until it was almost over. At the time I was frustrated that I had not committed to a long-range project. If there’s a next time, I will try to see each day as a chance to build something significant, even if I don’t know at the outset how much time I’ll end up having.
       5. My brief but intense experience of illness (approx. 5 weeks of flu, bronchitis, and recovery) taught me to respect my body’s needs, be patient about taking time to rest, and prioritizing physical self-care even if this meant living in a messy home and re-wearing dirty clothes. It only _feels_ like things will be this grubby forever!
       6. Some days the best cure for gloom is to do something nice for someone else. Other days, the best cure is to eat something chocolate and high-calorie (or whatever defines your comfort snack or small self-indulgent activity).

       Stay strong. Eventually there IS a light at the end of the tunnel, and it won’t be the headlight of an oncoming train.

       1. Thanks so much for this. Your experience sounds like mine, also had a 6 week bout of a really bad respiratory illness.

    3. P.S. Double-posting?! Oy vey! Sorry, folks.

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