Corporette.com

Updated: Oct 30, 2018 108 Comments · by

Coffee Break: ‘Friar’ Shopper

Coffee Break

This post may contain affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

Gray Shoulder Bag: Hobo 'Friar' Shopper Hobo is a solid brand for affordable, quality leather. They have a very popular, long-running bestseller, the Lauren wallet, but today I'm featuring this shoulder bag, the Friar. Note that the leather has a soft, distressed look to it, which can be great, but some colors may veer a little too far into the “ooh, she needs a new bag” territory, at least for a work environment. I like this gray “granite” color the best, which Nordstrom, Zappos, and Amazon all have for $238. Hobo ‘Friar' Shopper P.S. A few shopping alerts for you: Ann Taylor's having a “50% off everything” sale (including sale items), 6PM is having its “biggest sale ever” (with free shipping today only) — TONS of Coach shoes — and Nordstrom Rack is having its Alexis Bittar sale event now. (L-all)

Sales of note for 9.10.24

Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…

RSS Error: A feed could not be found at `https://corporette.com/tag/posts/feed`; the status code is `403` and content-type is `text/html; charset=utf-8`

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

About Kat

Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. Anon

    Tried posting this several times this morning to no avail. Does anyone have any gift recommendations for trail runners in the $10-20 range as a good-luck gesture before a big race?

    • anon

      Their favorite beverage/snack to be enjoyed post race. Most runners have a “nothing new on race day” mentality so you probably don’t need to go the socks/energy gels/water bottle route unless you know what they use.

    • Libby

      Shwings! My local running store has them in a variety of colors, they look awesome, and don’t have any of the nothing new on race day issues. I suggest the golden glittery ones.

    • CountC

      I can tell you what this trail runner would want – cold beer for when I am finished!

      But if that’s not your trial runner’s thing, I agree with favorite post-race snacks/food. Most trail runners are going to be fully prepped and not wanting to change or add anything right before the race. The only thing I could think of that I would be okay swapping out before the race is a new fun Buff, but that only applies if your runner already likes and wears those. http://buffusa.com/search-buff/headbands

    • Lobbyist

      insulated water bottle
      socks
      headband
      wooden roller things for self-massage

    • bridget

      For a night time race, those little clippy blinking lights are fun.

      Post-race snacks are good.

      I bring flip-flops to a race and put them in my gear check bag so I can get my tired, sometimes blistered feet out of my sneakers. Maybe a cute pair?

  2. ANP

    I have succeeded in achieving my greatest professional dream and worst nightmare all in one day. I’ve been invited to a corporate retreat with about a dozen c-suite executives (and their spouses) who are involved with my organization — four days of recreational activities along with social events and meetings. I’m not sure yet if my husband will attend.

    I read the post on this s!te from a reader whose first day on the job was at a retreat, but this is different — it’s not with my peers, and I’m not new to the organization. I’m going to talk to my (male) boss about what to wear (he’s great like that) but other than him and one peer, I am the only other staff person attending. I am also the only female employee who will be there. It is a huge opportunity and a major validation of my role here, but of course it’s also a wee bit terrifying.

    What I’m specifically looking for are polished, casual, summer-appropriate clothes that are a step up from my regular weekend mom athleisure uniform. I have probably about $250 to throw at this. I’m thinking statement necklaces with t-shirt or jersey dresses, and linen pants (I have a bunch of these already). What kinds of casual tops would you recommend? Dresses? Outfits that are a step up from a t-shirt dress for evening wear? Appropriate shoe options? Other tips on surviving a countryside retreat like this? Helpppppp…

    • AZCPA

      Can you provide more detail on the venue and what leisure activities you’ll be doing?This will help with more specific suggestions. Personally, I find t-shirt type dresses REALLY casual (like beachwear casual) and wouldn’t dream of wearing them in front of people I want to impress, though places like Land’s End and Athleta have some more structure jersey dresses that might be what you have in mind.

      • ANP

        Without outing myself, it is at a remote location near a lake so there will be things like pontoon rides — as well as golf, tennis, fishing, and hiking.

        • AZCPA

          I feel like this calls for my favorite Atheta skort, the Metro. enough structure to look polished, can dress up a bit (like for a luncheon) with a nicer top and cardigan, and take you through more physical activities with no issue. As this is your first retreat with the group, you definitely want to be dressed in a way that allows you to fully participate in activities like the men will be doing. On top, I’d do nice t-shirts like the modal Caslon ones (White House Black Market usually has nice Ts). For shoes, you’ll need ones that fit the activities you are doing. Maybe a functional but cute sandal (I have some leather ones from Ahnu that have lots of support and good traction) as generic daytime footwear, but then you’ll need sneakers for tennis, something to hike it, etc (bonus point for Athleta skorts, as they still look cute with hiking boots).

          For evening, while you definitely want to find out if there’s a dress code, my instinct is to lean toward a structured ponte or jersey dress with a wedge sandal.

        • Anonon

          I think the wardrobe response is also really regionally specific.

          Fancy people in mountain west would wear a ton of fancy patagonia, etc. Fancy people in the SE would wear khakis and sperry topsiders and polos. Fancy people from NYC might wear nice jeans and fashion-y sneakers.

          • Anonon

            To keep with my broad stereotyping – I’d anticipate that the guys are in klakis and topsiders and polo shirts/button down shirts.

            For a retreat that mainly involved not very active activities, I would suggest either knee length skirts with nice sandals and a casual blouse/really nice t shirt and some fun yet nice jewlery – like a half step between casual friday and business casual.

            For more active things, I would suggest a pair of colored slim casual cotten trousers and a nice-ish blouse/nice t-shirt and either sporty yet chic sneakers or not grubby sport sandals (such as my beloved chacos).

            If it was more active than that I would wear more exercise/hiking gear in looser fits.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      This will probably get massive downvotes but when I need to look business casual with a bunch of men and still be really hands on, I go to the male uniform of khakis or Bermuda shorts and a polo or casual collared button down. The key is fit and tailored. I got a surprisingly stylish looking ensemble for a work golf clinic and Kohls. I didn’t want to go the dress/skirt route because I was going to be bending over so much. I also just wanted to fit in and not stick out even more. I’m also 20 – 30 years younger than the people I was with. I do a dress for the pontoon boat but khaki/golf shorts look for tennis, golf, fishing and hiking. Think Eddie Bauer. Not super stylish but outdoor practical and conservative.

      • Blonde Lawyer

        Also, I’ve got a $10 reward certificate at Eddie Bauer. No idea why. I haven’t bought anything there in a long time. It expires 6/29 so feel free to use it if someone doesn’t snatch it first.

        Certificate number: E241080943421

        • Free Money

          I get those all the times, they are really handy for keeping myself in t shirts, camis and socks. Especially since they so frequently have 50% off everything in the store. I have never bought anything in the store without using one.

    • Anonymous

      If you like boho style, look at Lucky Brand. I like that they have not succumbed to all polyester, all the time. You can find some mainstream/classic items.
      Splendid is a bit more expensive brand, but really nice quality.
      I would caution you against 100% linen pants – they wrinkle and stay wrinkled. Too casual for a retreat with C-level execs. I second Anon’s suggestion of colored cotton slim pants, ankle of full-length.

  3. HSAL

    I have this bag in the pictured granite and I adore it. I love all Hobo bags and wallets.

  4. LDR

    There have been a lot of posts recently about long distance relationships/marriages for purposes of taking or maintaining a job. I’m several months into a long distance situation, after being married for 2 years. I’m in Biglaw, at a unicorn firm that I actually enjoy, but I realize there’s no guarantee that it’s a forever job. DH is testing out a new career and deciding whether it’s the right fit before we make any moves, but he’s being excelling and is really loving it. His new job is very geographically specific, while I likely would be able to find something new, so our tendency has been to assume that I’ll move to where he is. The problem is that it’s all very ambiguous as to when and how we are going to figure this out. And being Type A, I’m getting impatient.

    My problem is, I’ve worked hard to get where I am and have strongly feminist values, and feel so uncertain about the concept of “giving up” my career for a relationship. I’d almost certainly be taking cuts in pay and status at work. Also, the new city where women seem to work in more part-time roles/stay at home more (southern-ish). But I’m not sure that all of these factors are worth losing a marriage over, which I imagine will happen if we are perpetually long distance. Curious to hear from those who have made a similar move “for love” and how it all played out. Also welcome to insights on how the hive would handle this situation.

    • I Was You

      Oooh, boy. I could have written this exact post a few years ago. I left a Big Law job I really enjoyed because my husband got a job that could only be done in one specific place in the US and my firm didn’t have an office there (although it sounds like you see more of a future at your firm than I did at mine; I was a fifth year who was already exploring exit options independent of my H’s career, but his job sped up my departure and made it focused on a different location where I had very limited options). Like your potential new location, the area we moved to is Southern, with very few women who work and with very little diversity in the legal profession. I did find legal work there but it was not intellectually satisfying and it was an awful cultural fit. Ultimately, fighting the Mad Men culture became exhausting, and I left the legal profession to take a job in a friendlier, stereotypically female profession. I feel like I should add that I did an undergrad engineering degree and worked on a lot of male-dominated cases in Big Law and I have no problem being the only woman in a class/meeting/trial. But I do have a problem working with men whose attitudes about women, minorities and many other things are stuck in the 1950s.

      I’m generally happy in my new job. The pay is much less than I made as a lawyer, of course, but the hours and stress are much lower and I like the work and have nice colleagues. That said, if we hadn’t moved for H’s career I’d almost certainly still be practicing law, and I know there are people who see me as making an anti-feminist decision because I gave up a highly-compensated career I was good at to follow my husband. Knowing what I know now, I would still make the same decision because ultimately we couldn’t be together unless we moved here, and my H absolutely loves his career in a way I never did (at best I was pretty happy, which might be 75th percentile job satisfaction for a lawyer, but it doesn’t compare to the passion he feels for what he does). It’s hard with two-career couples when one member of the couple’s job demands a specific location, and the reality is that unless you’re stupendously lucky, the trailing spouse’s career is not going to be as good as if they’d stayed put. I’m probably an extreme example of how bad it can get, and many trailing spouses find satisfactory work in their original field. But many don’t, and I think you need to go into this with your eyes wide open. If you make this move, there’s a good chance your career will look very different a couple of years from now.

      • SE powerchick

        Where were you?

        I don’t want to pick on a city.

        I am in the SE US and I don’t feel that way at work. I didn’t feel that way when I was single. I didn’t feel like that when I had kids in day care (so: other working moms, all of these being people with very good education-intensive careers). Now that I have kids in school, I feel like the oddball (but I could feel like that in NYC or DC too, I just only lived there as a singleton).

        • I Was You

          I’m not in a major city. I have no doubt I would have had a different experience in Atlanta or some place like that. My area is much smaller than that, but it’s not exactly rural either (small city/big town of about 200,000).

        • I Was You

          Also, although I’m sure Atlanta would have been a better cultural fit for me, I’m still not sure it would have been great for my career. The kind of legal work I did and really wanted to do doesn’t really exist in the Southeast. I stand by my comment that many trailing spouses take a hit to their career, and that’s not South-specific. Through my H’s company, I’ve met a group of women here who all followed their husbands, and almost none of them are working in their former careers, mostly not by choice. Their career either doesn’t exist here or they haven’t been able to find a job (after years of trying). The hit to your career may be worth it, but I think it’s naive to assume your career won’t suffer at all, unless you’re moving to some place like NYC where you can do literally anything.

      • Ellen

        Hug’s to you for giving up so much for DH. Personaly, I think I would feel the same way, as an accomplished partner in a BOUTIQUEE law firm doeing WC law in NYC, the biggest market in the USA, but I guess if I were to find a guy worthy enough to give all of this up for, I WOULD and become a housewife focussed on our kid’s, even tho it sounds like the 1950’s, b/c I would NOT marry just any schlub, but a schlub makeing enough money to support BOTH of us and the KIDS, kind of like what Rosa has with Ed. Ed makes alot of money selling stuff at Merilynch company to peeople, so they have a great lifestyle–he can get home early anytime, and does NOT work at all on weekend’s or holiday’s b/c the market is closed.

        Personaly, I would want my husband NOT to be home as much as ED, b/c as it is I would have to sleep with him every nite anyway, so why have him hanging around during the day too when I could be out shopping or at the club? FOOEY!

      • anon

        Curious what your female dominated industry is now? This sounds attractive to me!

        • I Was You

          My title is something weirdly specific that I don’t want to say, but it’s basically marketing/public relations. I work with a lot of people who have degrees in marketing, communications and English. It’s definitely a “pink gh*tto” job in terms of pay and prestige, but otherwise it’s a really good gig.

    • newbinlaw

      If you had a regional-specific career, and H was the lawyer, would he move?
      If so, I don’t see it as anti-feminist. Just making things work and putting marriage first. With that said, if there is any risk that his new job won’t be (semi) permanent, could you do the distance thing for ~ 6 months? That way you can keep your job, & have time to look at the market in the new area and find a great fit.

    • Anonymous

      What year are you? You say you’ve been married for 2 yrs — are you also a 2nd yr associate? Or more senior? When would your DH make a decision that his career/business is a go and you both should be in his city? The more junior you are the better it is for you, but in any event — it sounds like you both WILL end up in his city. So what prevents you from talking to recruiters, joining the local bar association there, waiving into that states bar, talking to anyone you can find via linkedin who works in that area — so that you can start looking for a comparable job? If it’s a smaller city or a huge move it may take a while, but why assume that it isn’t possible to go into biglaw/midlaw in that city until you’ve actually tried it?

    • Scarlett

      So I can’t imagine not moving for love. For anything less than a husband, no. From where I sit in my own relationship, there’s no job that would keep me from moving where it made sense for us to be. I’m also a little skeptical of the idea that you have to move to a region to do most jobs – the world has gotten a lot more flexible and you might not even have to give up a job to move. I’d explore telecommuting, I’d apply for jobs in the new city, take the bar, do what you need to do, but go with your husband. My personal point of view is my family and personal life decisions will always be the most important to me. Work is secondary. (& I love what I do.)

    • anon0321

      Hi Lady! Not sure if it’s too late for you to see this.. but I posted asking a very close question last week. My husband was laid off earlier this year, got pretty much a dream job on the east coast… while I have a dream job on the west coast that has gold plated benefits that I don’t want to give up for a variety of reasons. Also, the reason that I worked really hard to get where I’m at and would be losing a lot career wise is a real sticking point to me. To complicate matters, we have a very wee one.
      I have no idea how things will work out, however, we have decided to make it work long distance/travelling as long as we can. My job is being fairly flexible and my boss was super open to the potential of telecommuting and traveling in when I need to. My plan atm is to spend 2 weeks on the west coast & 2 weeks on the east coast. So, we are going to take it 1 day at a time and see how long we can keep it up. In the meantime, we will save up money and have more experience on our resumes which will hopefully help when/if one of decides to leap from our careers to something else. We are going to check in every 6 months with a serious convo about if it’s working and either one of us can pull the plug at any time (for us, my hubby has agreed this means him moving back to the west coast). I’m feeling encouraged that we can make it work and that it’s the right decision for us.
      Anyway- good luck! Also, I do know people that telecommute for biglaw. It’s not ideal, and you probably will lost some career traction, but it would let you stay status quo for a while- esp if you are getting lots of hours anyway that don’t necessarily require you to interact with others. You might want to see if that is an option.

  5. Cb

    Eeeks, I might be on a radio panel tomorrow! A bit terrified but reminding myself that no one listens to the radio at 11am.

    • Anon Nuclear

      Except all of us if you tell where to tune into! You’ll do great.
      I’ve done a few radio spots. My advice is to speak slowly, even if you don’t typically talk too fast. And, depending on your topic, don’t give them savory sound bites. I had to go anon for this so I don’t out myself, but here’s the gist of the last bit. I was on the radio talking about pro-nuclear topics. In the course of my discussion, I said something like “most people think nuclear fuel is the Simpson’s type fuel-lime green and glowing, maybe even oozing.” (I then went on to explain it’s not, it’s contained, it’s regulated (especially as compared to fly ash…),etc.) OF COURSE the “most people think” was left out and all the 10 sec previews for that spot were the last bit…. ugh. Also, have fun!

      • Vi

        + 1. Everything you say should be brief and able to stand on its own. Memorize a couple of lines that you wnat to make sure you’ve said that you can plug into answers where appropriate.

  6. WestCoast Lawyer

    Any recommendations for online consignment sites that take mid-range brands (JCrew, Banana, Boden, etc.)? I’m looking for something similar to ThredUp where they just send you a bag, you dump everything in and send it back. Unfortunately, both ThredUp and Swap have suspended taking new clothes for at least the next month or more and I’ve got a large pile of stuff that I’d like to try to get a little cash for.

    • JTX

      How did you hear that ThredUp isn’t taking clothes right now? I just sent in a bag about a week ago, but the bag had been sitting around my house for months. I didn’t see anything on the ThredUp website that says they aren’t taking clothes — am I missing it?

      • WestCoast Lawyer

        If you go through the steps to order a bag it says they aren’t sending out any new bags and to “check back” after 7/21, but I think they are still accepting bags that were already sent out.

    • Betterandbetter

      You may want to consider donating the stuff if you strike out in finding another consignment shop- if you are in a certain tax bracket it’s almost always better to donate than it is to spend the energy selling things unless you need the cash right now (which you aren’t guaranteed in any case) although writing off the donation has it’s own hassles.

  7. Extrovert

    So, I feel like I’ve seen a lot of “how to handle introverts/be an introvert” stuff online. But what about those of us whose recharge time requires other people? I can’t FORCE people to be available to do things!

    Mostly I feel like as I get older, more of my friends are married or have kids or busy with work, and less willing to hang out/do dinner, especially on weeknights. But I’m an extrovert who works from home. It’s killing me to not have people around!

    I do have some ways I deal: joined a coworking space (though it’s pretty quiet and un-social), have a roommate, participate in an activity that happens several days a week that I can just show up to and know people but don’t have to make special plans. Anyone else have ideas?

    • Anonymous

      Volunteering would be a great option. Maybe tutoring kids at your local high school or helping immigrants learn English or volunteering in a charity shop?

    • Aunt Jamesina

      What about something like an acting class? I feel that that tends to attract extroverts.

    • Meg Murry

      -Lunch dates with friends, colleagues or people in the co-working space?
      -Find a more social co-working space?
      -Sign up for a continuing ed class that involves actively doing something like cooking?
      -Volunteering: Our food pantry has evening volunteer hours, as do local churches and/or shelters that serve dinners.
      -If your work from home time is flexible, volunteer for Meals on Wheels or similar home visiting service?
      -Offer to bring dinner to people or cook for them at your place instead of going out for dinner?
      -Join a professional organization like Rotary, Kiwanis, City Club, Women’s Networking Group, etc – some meet at lunch or breakfast, but it might help
      -Do you have a skill where you could teach a class or lead a discussion group?
      -Take your friends’ older kids for an outing? Or become a join Big Sisters or Best Buddies or similar mentor program ?
      -Join an intermural soccer/softball/trivia/bowling league?
      -Call your local senior center or nursing home and find out if there are lonely residents who would want to have dinner with you or have you sit with them in the evening?
      -Get to know your neighbors – invite them for dinner or evening drinks?
      -Find random events and post on Facebook “I’m going to [event] on [date] at [time]. Who wants to join me?”

      -Does it help to talk to people, even if only on the phone? I have had standing “appointments” for phone calls with a friend across the country during one of our lunch breaks, driving commutes (with a bluetooth, once my kids are in bed, etc.

    • Wildkitten

      Have a group of 25 friends you can call on, so that whenever you need one, one is available.

  8. L2L

    Can anyone recommend running shorts that do not ride up and will not cause thigh chaffing? I have thicker thighs that rub together at the top. I have been sticking to capris for my runs, but would really love to wear some shorts (heat! humidity!). I would prefer to stay away from compression shorts, unless there are no other options. Any specific recommendations would be greatly appreciated!
    TIA!

    • Libby

      Shorts with a longer inseam are my chafing solution! I run almost exclusively in Oiselle Long Rogas during the summer (6″ inseam), but there are lots of companies that make 5-6″ inseam shorts that work.

      Also, Body Glide on the chafing points.

    • pilates

      How high up? I’m a pear whose thighs touch for about 3 inches at the top and I like Nike’s Tempo shorts and I don’t experience chaffing with those.

    • Carrots

      I started using Monistat anti-chafing powder gel for under skirts this spring (recommended by someone here I think) and I used it earlier this summer for a run and it worked great then too! I don’t know how long you typically go but I’m only out for about 30-45 minutes and I was fine the whole way through.

    • ALX emily

      I wear Nike Tempo shorts + bodyglide for short runs when it’s not too humid, otherwise compression shorts.

    • EB0220

      Salamon running skirts are really nice. The compression shorts are longer = no chafing.

    • Runner 5

      H&M sell knee length running tights which are incredible (and super cheap too). The pocket in back fits my keys and a card for buying water on the way home!

    • Emmabean

      Your best bet for anti-chafe is definitely compression shorts (which I am interpreting as tight shorts, like bike shorts?) Have you tried a running skirt? I’m not into the way they look, but you get to wear compression shorts and still have coverage.

    • NY CPA

      I just bought some knee length bike shorts (not tight like compression shorts so more comfy but similar look) from Old Navy and like them a lot.

    • Monte

      Nike tempo do not work for my thighs — they result in chafing and a terrible bunchy crotch look. I prefer compression shorts, but just got the Athleta Ready Set Two in One 4″ short (they also come in 6″) and they work pretty well too.

  9. Anon for This

    I’m a mid-level at a small firm and I’m just really lonely right now. My work BFF left for another job a few weeks ago and there’s really no one else at my level or above me. There are a couple senior associates but one works from home and the other works part-time. There are some junior associates but one of them has an issue with me because I do the work she wants (I know this sounds ridiculous but it’s true). She organizes things with the other junior associates but purposely leaves me out (I’m the only one not invited). Which is fine because I don’t really want to be friends with her but I’m just so lonely. I feel like I have no one to talk to at the office and no one has my back and I’ve never been in this position before where I feel like I need to protect myself and I’m being totally excluded from firm things as a result. It’s just so mean girls and I haven’t had issues like this since junior high but I would love some advice (or commiseration).

    I’m looking for a new job but I don’t want to give up something I love most days just because of junior high drama.

    Thanks all.

    • Mac

      I am about to be in that position. I’m planning on making more time for proper out-of-the-office lunches to catch up with other friends and acquaintances, rather than eat at my desk trying to be productive. Might as well spend time with people you want to spend time with.

      • Mindy

        This is really good advice. My old firm didn’t really have young associates who wanted to be friends beyond quick chats about work and small talk with the secretaries so I ended up maintaining my network outside of my firm which was GREAT for the long term career.

        • Anonymous

          This is what I do at my mid-sized firm where the culture doesn’t lend itself to associate bonding.

    • Dulcinea

      That really sucks…I agree with Mac’s advice, but also, any reason you can’t invite the rest of the juniors out for a get-together after work? Include Mean Girl just to be the bigger person. Or invite people out one at a time.

    • Anon for This

      Thanks everyone. This is all good advice.

      And I guess there’s no reason why I can’t invite people out – for some reason, this mean girl behavior is making me feel like an insecure loser. I need to put my big girl pants on and just rise above but it just all feels so crappy right now.

  10. Anon

    2 weeks until my first triathlon! Any other tri ladies on here? Any tips, advice or words of wisdom?

    • CountC

      I’m only of the runner variety, but you’re going to kick it’s BUTTTTTT!

    • Anon

      Practice your breathing exercises or whatever you need to do to keep your heart rate normal (ish) before the swim and you’ll be fine! Good luck!

    • Anon

      Be super organized with your transition and run through it a couple of times before the race (where you keep what, what steps you need, like sunscreen, socks, etc). Don’t forget a towel/transition mat. You’ll have a great time!

    • Chris

      How exciting! Mostly, just have fun. You will make all kinds of mistakes on the first race, so just roll with it.

      Swim: don’t start out too fast, you will pay for it later. When you get close to the finish, start kicking your legs harder to get some blood back to them, and be careful when you stand up out of the water as you might get a little dizzy. Put your googles on your head, not in your hand, first thing from getting out of the water, use your hands to get out of your wetsuit. Unzip your top half of the wetsuit as you head into transition, so when you get to your bike you are already halfway out and can just pull the bottom half off quickly in transition. Have a routine for putting your gear on, so you don’t forget anything. I go from feet to head: shoes, sunglasses, helmet.

      Bike: make sure you eat and drink enough. Same routine for transition, except here I go the opposite direction: helmet, race belt, switch shoes.

      Run: depends on the distance, but have a strategy. Short race: as hard as you can. Long race: know your pace, breaks for food/water, etc. I always die on the run, so I just try to get through it.

      Pre-ride the course, so you are familiar with it. Watch your food the day before, nothing with lots of fiber, or anything hard on your stomach. I once ate a steak salad the night before a half-ironman and it was not pretty.

      Good luck!!

    • Anonymous

      Good luck, and have fun — you’re going to be great! Is it an open water one? If so, and if you’ve never swum (swam? swimmed?!) in open water before, definitely take advantage of the go-test-out-the-water practice they’ll likely have the day before. Open water swimming in a crowd is SO DIFFERENT from swimming in a pool lane. Sorry for the Ellen caps, but it is warranted. I’m a lifelong swimmer and I have never been so uncomfortable in the water as at the start of my first open water triathlon. Couldn’t see a d@mn thing, people kicking me, splashes everywhere. It was ridic.

      If it’s an outdoor pool tri, the most important thing is to stay out of the sun while you wait to swim. At least for me, it saps your energy like no other.

  11. Anonymous

    Does anyone have earphones that are comfortable to sleep in? My iPhone buds barely stay in my ears are pokey when I lay on my side. (I have sleep problems, and the white noise app bugs my bf.)

  12. Annie

    I saw that there was a thread this morning about dealing with cramps. I know I’m late, but I just have to say —

    I’ve struggled with really painful periods for years, including after I started the pill. I would take Advil (and probably too much of it sometimes because the pain would be debilitating some months.) I started seeing a new GYN last year, who had me switch from Advil to a strong dose of what’s in Aleve. He prescribes it, but it’s the equivalent of 2 over the counter pills. He has me start taking it two or three days before my period starts, and has me take it twice a day.

    This has made a HUGE difference and has been so much more helpful. Of course, I don’t want to suggest that anyone takes more OTC meds than you’re supposed to without a doc. But I just wanted to add this, because I have been incredibly shocked my how much more effective Aleve is than Advil for me. So also consider talking to your doctor about it.

    • Anonymous

      I swear by Aleve for cramps! I usually take 2 when my period sets in, and it can vary in effectiveness. I may try a few days before… but I’m fairly irregular, so it’s difficult to predict.

    • OP from this morning

      Thank you Annie, i will ask the doc about that too.

      Sigh, we missed the doctor’s appointment because there was an accident on the freeway. Rescheduled for next week.

    • EM

      Oh my YES. And it is REALLY effective when you take it at the beginning. I thought I was the only one!

  13. anon a mouse

    Thoughts on Le Tote or Gwynnie Bee for clothing rental? Or other sites to recommend? I’m in the process of losing weight after baby and don’t want to buy a new wardrobe until my weight/shape stabilizes, but I need some professional clothes in my closet until then. I work in a business casual office (usually blazers but not suits).

    • Mindy

      Unless GB has changed in the last year, I found the clothes not business casual enough and pretty worn out such that I’d donate it, not wear it.

    • SFAttorney

      I’ve been subscribed to Le Tote for about six months and I really like it.The blouses/tops, sweaters, and jewelry supplement my wardrobe— worn with a suit or “work trousers.” Their pants are mostly leggings so if I choose any, I wear them on the weekend, as I do with Lr Tote’s more casual tops and sweaters. Of course, check to see whether there are enough professional clothes and they are “professional enough” for your situation. I find Le Tote reps to be responsive by email to questions and complaints. I’ve gotten small credits when an earring was broken or there was a mistaken charge (the charge was credited too).

    • Anonna

      I did Le Tote, and while it could be a nice patch while you’re re-sizing after pregnancy, I didn’t like it and didn’t wear any of the clothes. Everything smelled strongly of detergent and felt…used. It was like wearing borrowed clothes but borrowed from a stranger. It really grossed me out.

    • halp

      I’ve really enjoyed LeTote, actually! Reliving sorority days where I could shop from a ton of closets, so I am very OK with the “borrowed” feel!

      You can choose what you want sent to you, which is awesome. Fast shipping. I normally get tops and jewelery.

      I have an insatiable desire to shop, and this kind of caps it a pretty reasonable price point, and I always have something new to wear or can try out something without a commitment.

    • ace

      I’m a couple months into Le Tote, and I really like it. I am very hands on in picking what I will actually wear (and not what stylists have picked for me), so feel like I get items that I would at least have tried on in a store. I typically wear all of the items at least 1x, with my favorite 1-2 times. If you chose to keep the item, prices are probably slightly higher than off the rack, but not ridiculously high. Quality is firmly “OK/Good” — not great — but most items have arrived in very good shape with no evidence of wear.
      I like that LT makes me much more conscious of my clothes and what I have as I incorporate the new items. I think it would be great for transitional sizes/post-baby! Good luck! There are free-first-tote invitations out there — if you are comfortable sharing your email address, I ‘m happy to send you one of my invitations.

  14. Anon

    What are your best recommendations for soft cotton tees or tanks to wear for sleeping? I’m finally going to upgrade from my old, stained, stretched out men’s shirts from Gap and get something that is still casual, but a little more feminine and deliberate looking. I’d like quality cotton but don’t want to spend a ton. TIA!

      • Annony

        Me too. The Merona brand right now is super soft.

        I’ve also been hugely impressed by my impulse tshirt buys at Uniqlo.

  15. halp

    I stopped reading ATL because I mostly read the commentary (to be horrified/amused, mostly horrified, like a wreck I couldn’t look away from), and then they stopped with the comments.

    BUT I would pay $$$ to see the ATL commentariat commenting on this:

    https://imgur.com/a/skffp

    All the love to the public defenders out there who get to work with these gems. :/

      • Anon

        Not as bad as … but who could be … nonetheless judges should be held to a higher standard and some of the things he said were wildly inappropriate. I wouldn’t have engaged in that conversation for nearly that long (and obviously would not have stooped to defendant’s level of discourse).

    • one two blue

      So did this really happen? I’m appalled at the judge for engaging to that level.

  16. Junior Looking to Move

    I could use some advice, or, at the very least, a bit of a pick-me-up.

    I’m a junior associate at a litigation boutique and I am looking to move for a number of reasons. Pay is one of them, but a much larger part is that the working environment is extremely poor (i.e. being berated for using the wrong format for the subject line of an internal administrative email), there is no mentorship, and not much work at the firm overall. The work that is available not particularly complex, either. The one upside is that my hours are generally whatever I want them to be.

    I took a chance on this firm coming into it, hoping that because it was smaller, I’d get to be on my feet sooner in court than I would in BigLaw (I started out in BigLaw). This has been generally true, but I find that I very much miss the complexity and pace of the work I used to do. I knew within two months of starting here that I wanted to move, and it my plans to do so have been the only thing that got me through each day.

    However, that was now several months ago and I’ve just been rejected from a great job in another area of litigation because they now think I am too court focused for what they’ll be able to offer me, despite my being clear that I would be happy to move into that new practice area. I feel like I’m at a bit of a loss, and I’m increasingly worried that by taking this position I have closed other doors to me. I’m picking myself up after this rejection and already sending out feelers for other positions and networking away, but I feel like I am stuck in this job and that I won’t ever be able to move into something where I have even a modicum of career fulfilment.

    Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

    • Anonymous

      Some commiseration- I started a new job six months ago and I have a calendar notification (on my personal calendar) for the day I’m planning to give notice. My exit plan is the only thing that gets me through Monday through Thursday. The promise of the weekend gets me through Friday.

      I’m sorry for your recent rejection. Keep trying. The nice thing about your situation is that you’re looking for a job while you have a job. I don’t know how long you’ve been there, but it seems like less than a year, and I can promise you that you’re not going to be pigeon-holed after a year with any one place.

      Good luck and I hope we get a good news update from you soon!

  17. LostInTranslation

    I’m older than the average reader here and I promise you that things will get better. Careers are long with ups and downs. Sometimes you’re stuck for awhile and you just have to get through it. Try to use this holding time to do things that will benefit you down the road – networking, continuing ed, even just taking care of yourself. Also don’t forget that no right now doesn’t mean no forever. Sorry I know this sounds really trite but I can tell you that I remember very clearly being in your shoes and I couldn’t have dreamt then of all the opportunities that have come my way since. Hang in there!

    • anonymous

      I’m not the OP but am in a similar place, and absolutely needed to hear perspective like this right now. Thank you so much for adding this.

  18. Super Anon

    I posted last Friday about my company not having the money to deliver customer orders, I was so stressed and worried that my paycheck wouldn’t clear. You all helped me get past my panic and I polished up my resume and applied for a few jobs.

    I just got emailed for a phone screen! The job seems like it could be a good fit!

    Thank you for your encouragement!

Back to Top

About

Work with Corporette®

Serious Stuff

work fashion blog press mentions