Coffee Break: Box Tote
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If you like a structured, almost briefcase-type of look, this newer MZ Wallace box tote caught my eye. They have several options, and I'm not sure which kind of nylon I prefer, the tightly woven pattern (pictured here), the larger quilted nylon, which also comes in colors like a pretty blue, or the one with the “glossy finish” for a look like patent leather.
The available sizes make me feel a bit like Goldilocks, though — the pictured one (medium) looks great while held by the handle, but the size is 13″w x 8″h x 4″d — technically too small for even a sheet of paper. But maybe this doesn't matter to you! But then the bigger bag looks more like a weekender on the (admittedly probably very tiny) model – the interior capacity there is listed as 16″W x 14″H x 5.5″D.
The bags range from $265-$385.
Sales of note for 1/22/25:
- Nordstrom – Cashmere on sale; AllSaints, Free People, Nike, Tory Burch, and Vince up to 60%; beauty deals up to 25% off
- AllSaints – Clearance event, now up to 70% off (some of the best leather jackets!)
- Ann Taylor – All sale dresses $40 (ends 1/23)
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything
- Boden – Clearance, up to 60% off!
- DeMellier – Final reductions now on, free shipping and returns — includes select options like Montreal, Vancouver, and Venice
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; extra 50% off all clearance, plus ELOQUII X kate spade new york collab just dropped
- Everlane – Sale of the year, up to 70% off; new markdowns just added
- J.Crew – Up to 40% off select styles; up to 50% off cashmere
- J.Crew Factory – End of season sale, extra 60-70% off clearance, online only
- Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Semi-Annual Red Door Sale – extra 50% off
We have to get new blinds for a few rooms – any favorites? Not looking to spend a lot of money, just get a basic thing at Home Depot that will do the job. Do dark gray blinds look good with light gray walls?
I feel like the window wood and trim color matters for color of blinds.
It’s all painted white.
White blinds then.
But get the right white to look good against your trim.
+1 white blinds if they’re on the inside of the window trim.
If they were curtains outside the window, then dark grey.
+3
Non-white basic blinds against white frames just make the windows look puny.
I like the cordless blinds that you push up and down.
How do you split vacation house stays with friends? If you find a house with equally nice bedrooms/bathrooms for each person/couple, do you split the cost equally by the number of bedrooms? What if one person plans to leave early such that they’re not using their bedroom the last night?
I feel like you leaving early is on you. It’s not like you can get a sublet of that space.
Conversely, if you are staying longer than the rest of the group then the extra expense is on you.
Yes. If you leave early that’s on you
But if you can sublet it to someone known by the group, that should be fine. For example, the group that I tend to travel with has 8 core members (well, now 11 because 3 core members are now married). However, there are another ~10 or so folks who are mutual friends to all of us. Obviously some of those 10 are closer to different people, but we all will grab dinner or go out together. So, I think it’d be fair that if person A (core member) can’t spend the whole week, but person B (mutual friend) can come for a few days then they can fill their spot / cover the few days
Split cost evenly for however many rooms (irrespective of it’s a person or a couple occupying it). The person who plans gets the nicest room. If someone leaves early they eat the cost, they dont get a subsidy
No, split per person. Don’t stick the single friend with extra expenses
IDK about this. If for the same per-head cost I could put my snoring husband in a separate room, I would.
If you were renting from a hotel, per room makes sense and you decide how you fill it. In a girls trip where you double up to save money, you split the room costs. But the benefit to the solo person who doesn’t get to split the bill is that they do t have to share.
So this might be too much for a vacation, but in my shared house where some couples were occupying a room (hello bay area!) we did 50% of the rent is split per person, and 50% is split per room, and that always felt fair
Question: if I bring myself, my husband, and my kid, and we all share a room, should we pay 3x what a single person pays to share a room? If that’s the case, I’m getting a hotel.
Agreed – there has to be a balance.
Yeah I’ve never heard of charging more for kids in this situation. I don’t think a straight per person price makes sense, although if a single person takes a smaller, less comfortable room than it makes sense they’d pay less.
Pay less for the by-room rate or less for the by-person rate?
Tell me you’re not single without telling me.
I’m not single now but if I was one person I wouldn’t want to pay the same as a couple. Maybe split the rooms evenly but the single person pays less in terms of groceries. I hope you don’t have any single friends. You’re probably awful to them.
If you’re taking up a whole room, you pay for the whole room. You can split the costs of common areas by head, but asking for a subsidy on you having an entire room to yourself isn’t cool. You can always find a roommate.
Okay, but what if its a room with a twin bed? Then what?
Well, you can’t always find a roommate. A) the older I get, the less and less fellow single friends who can join these trips exist. B) friends often don’t want random people joining a friends trip – so you may have someone who can join but you may not have someone who fits with the group that others want to come
Do you KNOW how many couples I’ve subsidized to have their own bedroom in a vacation house, where my options as the single friend were the couch or an air mattress in a common room? “Find a roommate,” good grief.
It sucks to be single. Well, at least it’s really expensive…
I hope you don’t have any single friends and from that comment, I’m pretty sure you don’t.
In the case you’ve described, I would split the cost evenly based on the number of bedrooms. But I would let the person or family who took the lead on finding and booking the house have the first choice of rooms.
If someone leaves one night early, I think they should still pay their normal share. Now, if one person could only stay half the time, and this was disclosed from the get-go, I would probably come up with a per-night rate for that person. But everyone would need to be on board with this from the start.
If leaving early, I would account for when the dates were picked vs when the conversation about leaving early/staying extra happened; and whether it’s possible to rent the place for the shorter time period (like Couple A wants to stay 5 nights at a place only rented by the week)
This. If from the get-go someone says they can only come for the weekend but everyone else wants to go for the week, it should be per night. If after plans have already been made and someone says they are leaving early then they still pay the same rate.
If you are only talking families that are couples (so, one bedroom per couple), I’d split things equally per couple. If there is one bedroom that is nicer, it goes to the couple who has done the planning. If one couple has to leave early, they eat the cost unless they say upfront that they only want to pay for the nights that they are there. If you have some couples that also have kids taking up other bedrooms, my answer may be slightly different. If one family needs, say, three bedrooms total versus only one for other each of the other couples, I’d probably look at dividing up the cost more proportionately via bedrooms rather than couple/family.
As a solo traveler, if the plan isn’t splitting it by person I’m not going. Full stop. I’m fine with having a smaller room, but I’m not paying double what every other person does. For that, I can stay in a hotel.
Usually at a house there is a smaller or less awesome room that someone often wants for a smaller buy-in, like the room with bunks for kids. I’d take that one.
Flip side is, you get your own room and your own bed.
Not always though. And, even if you do, it’s likely the “kids room” so a twin bed and not a larger bed.
Then you pay per room or less for the bad room. But I see no reason why the same room should cost more based on the fact that it’s being shared.
Yup. I’m happy to take the small room with a twin bed or to share a room with two twin beds (with a friend of any gender) or share a larger bed with a girlfriend. I’m not fine with being charged the “per couple” amount as a single person.
Not only am I not joining on this trip, I’m also probably reconsidering the friendship.
The formula should be that bedrooms are split per the people who are using the bedrooms – so if 3 bedrooms occupied by couple, couple, single – single does pay twice as much if you look at it on a per-head basis. However, common areas – kitchen, living room, deck, shared bathrooms, etc should be split by head.
how the heck are you splitting the costs of common areas?
Usually by approximate square footage.
but like – everyone’s using the common areas. Why would that be a split cost? I’ve never heard of anything being split this way.
It’s just a question of how complicated you want to make it: the easy version is:
3 bedroom house costs $6000 for the week. Joe and Jane, Mark and Molly and Susie who is single are splitting it.
Assume the house is about 50/50 bedrooms and common areas, and all the bedrooms are roughly equal niceness.
The “common space cost” is half of the total – $3000. This gets split per head, so everyone pays $600 per person, the couples part $1200 per couple.
The “room cost” is also $3000 and is split by room: $1000 per room, whether it’s occupied by a single or couple.
So total “Mark & Molly” pay $1200 + $1000 = $2200; “Jane & Joe” pay $2200; Suzie pays $1600.
If you want to get more complicated, you can figure out if the common area vs room space should actually be 50/50, or is it really something like 40/60; and you can adjust for whether some rooms are much nicer than others but again YMMV, it depends on how much math you all want to do. Or you can always do closed-envelope bids:)
@anecdata is correct. Thanks for doing the full example.
Like I get the math behind that, but that’s the most bananas thing I’ve ever heard.
The thing I like about math is that it’s emotionless. What’s bananas is the level of emotion and victimhood all over this thread.
You can probably pull a general blueprint of the house from property records to get a more accurate square footage assessment. And if not, the renter should be able to send that information, copying everyone to ensure integrity, and then the math is pretty simple.
This is so crazy to me. If you stay in a hotel, you are paying for your own room, while the couple in the hotel is getting the room for the same cost but splitting it across two people. How is that same scenario “paying double” in a rental?
Yup. You pay per room in hotels and most resorts. Some all inclusive resorts charge a per person fee but it’s based on double occupancy, i.e., two to a room, and you’d pay a lot more than half the couple rate as a single person. Just dividing by the number of people doesn’t make sense to me.
Honestly, as a single person I go to great lengths to not stay in a hotel room (unless its a work trip) because it feels like a rip off since only I’m using it. I wish hotels had smaller rooms for single folks as an option!!
I am also confused, lol.
Honestly, I’d rather pay more for a hotel, recognizing that it’s the cost per room, just to get out of a house share that’s antagonistic to single people
“Antagonistic to single people” is pretty dramatic.
I’ve been the single person, the coupled person and the person with two kids putting four to a room. If all bedrooms are similar, it’s standard to pay per room. You don’t charge more for kids or less for people who don’t have partners or roommates. Singles can room with someone if they want a cheaper per person cost.
Obviously if a single person is taking a crappy, small room, or (god forbid) the couch or something, it’s a different story, and they should pay less. Just like a family would pay more if they needed a suite or extra large bedroom, but they don’t pay more for having two kids in a standard room.
So a family of four pays the same amount a single person?
Completely agree. In a hotel the person profiting off me being single isn’t a close friend! And I don’t have to clean it myself.
“So a family of four pays the same amount a single person?”
Yes, if they’re taking up the same amount of bedroom space. That’s how lodging works. You pay per occupied room. A bigger family/group pays more for food and activities.
Leaving early: that’s on them. These rentals almost always work by the week, not the day, so you pay for what you rent. It would be like saying “I only use the fridge and not the freezer, so I want a discount.”
Bedrooms: some hybrid of couples (who take up space in common areas, bathrooms, etc.) and bedrooms (singles get their own rooms). I would probably do something where a single person pays 3/4ths or so of what a married couple pays.
Imagine that it’s three couples and one single, $5,000 for the week. Maybe each couple pays $1,300 and the single person pays $1,100.
Why would you charge a single person almost $500 more than a person in a couple?
I think she means each person in a couple pays $1,300 and single pays $1,100. So single person pays less but not half.
Yes, I understand that. So, doing this math the per-person rate for a couple is $650 and the per-person rate for a single person is $1,100. That’s a HUGE difference!
No, she’s saying the per person rate for a couple is $1,300 and the per person rate for a single is $1,100.
She says a house is 5k with 3 couples and 1 single – that’s $1,300 per couple ($650/person) and $1,100 per person ($1,100 per person).
I am the one who posted that.
Assuming the rooms are the same, the single person would pay $1,100 for a room and the couples would pay $1,300 for their room. Yes, each couple is going to pay less than each single person, because they are sharing a room, but as a couple, they pay more (because they take up more space in a common area).
In a per-bedroom rate, in my example, the single person would pay $1,250.
Because you get a whole room to yourself.
Okay but presumably the couples share a room at home. So it’s not like the couples are getting anything “worse” by sharing a room. So, why should the singles pay more for something “better” since it’s not actually better
I’ve been married for 14 years, and for the past year, my husband and I have slept in different rooms 75% of the time. We both sleep much better and are much happier. We’ll be sharing a room on an upcoming vacation, and I’m a tad worried about it.
Ok but that’s a personal choice and being single isn’t necessarily
@6:23 my husband and I sleep separately at home, but haven’t had any issues sharing on vacations. I find it much easier to sleep on vacation – probably related to being free from work stress and the stress of daily life/chores. I hope it’s similarly smooth for you.
As the single person who people want to stick on the sofa or pull-out bed – don’t make me pay the same amount as couples getting their own bedroom :)
For sure with that. You pay the same and that gets you a room with a door for yourself. And an equally nice room also.
Everyone should get a door. Grown @$$ adults should not be sleeping on a sofa. Signed a grumpy 30 something who refuses to travel like a student anymore.
Eh, I’m 30 and I’m fine sleeping on a couch or something similar (the group I travel with is big, its hard to find a big enough spot) but obviously if I do this, I’m paying less.
THIS!
Yes! Even if we split it by room, the singles are always getting the crappiest room. So, we’re paying way more per person for a worse situation.
Also, often times on this trip a few singles will split a room anyways. I very, very rarely have my own room on these types of trips anyways. So, why not just charge by person and make it easier?
If you’re sharing a room, then you split the cost of that room with your roommate. Then you’re each paying as much as each member of a couple.
Okay, going off of this – if there’s a room with 3 twin beds so 3 singles share it – how do you do the math?
That means the people sharing the 3 person room each pay for 1/3 of the room.
OP’s example is that all the rooms are approximately equal in niceness. If there’s a crappy room, obviously adults can figure out how much less that’s worth.
What I actually do in practice is rent the house for myself and my family for the whole week, then invite a friend or two (usually single friends) to come spend a few days & all they have to do is bring along some food. I don’t make them split the rent.
But if you’re all trying to make it as fair as possible, there’s an example upstream that is absolutely the fairest way to do it.
Leaving early: If someone announces during planning that they can’t stay the whole trip and the group still agrees to book the longer duration then I think that person should not have to pay for the extra night. If they decide after to come late or leave early or don’t make it known that they absolutely cannot stay the whole time, then they should pay the duration.
Splitting the cost: Singles should not be charged the same rate as couples, hands down. Cost should be per person and not per bedroom, assuming singles have a passable bedroom. If singles are delegated to couches, pull out beds, trundles, top bunks, air mattresses, cots, or what have you they should get a discount. That being said, assuming its a friends trip and everyone knows each other – singles can absolutely be asked to share a room or share a bed.
I’ve yet to find a summer rental in a vacation area that doesn’t rent by the week rather than by the night. I think the question is that a member of the group thinks that if they only stay 5 nights they should only pay for 5/7 of their share. That’s not fair and it’s sticking the host with the cost. You have to agree up front to rent a place for a week. It’s different than a hotel where you can only use the nights you need as an individual.
Exactly. Imagine if everyone leaves after day 5 – the landlord wouldn’t accept 5/7ths of the cost.
I’m admittedly having a week where I’m very unhappy with being mid 30s and single. The post-30s adult world does not feel built for single adults. I don’t want to be single, I try very hard to not be single, but I am. Most people in my situation don’t want to be single.
If a friend tried to charge me as much for a room as a couple on a trip I would not go.
Here’s the thing – as the single person, regardless of what portion I’m paying, I’m going to get the smallest room anyways. I also, obviously, am only one person / taking up one person’s space in the house. I also, obviously, am on a single income. I’m already getting shafted on the single person tax for so much in life. Don’t give me the single person tax on a friends trip too.
You’re asking your friends to subsidize you, then. Say you’re going with two couples and you as a singleton. If the two couples were going without you, they could rent a two bedroom place. But if you’re joining and it needs to be a three bedroom place, then you have to pay for that bedroom. You can get another singleton to share your room if you want to pay the same as the couples.
honestly, my friends in dual income households can subsidize this long-term single woman. I honestly don’t care.
AMEN.
yup, they already make more than I do and get to split expenses. They can subsidize me for one weekend.
Yikes, I really hope my single friends don’t think I owe them compensation for their life circumstances
Yup
I have kids, so I’m not sure if the dual income really helps all that much…..
This!! I’m in a relationship and splitting rent and other bills. I can pay an extra $100.
Okay in every single 3+ bedroom house I’ve rented there’s been one room that’s clearly a “kids room” with a twin bed, so it only even fits one person. In that situation, the single person is obviously going to draw the short straw and get the single bed. Obviously, the costs should be split per person and not per room.
Agreed.
After reading most of the comments, I think there ultimately needs to be some wiggle room for different situations. I think everyone is forgetting that you are traveling with friends and family who you hopefully want to spend time with. Often times the single person is paying more in rent, trying to save up for a home on their own, and in general paying the single person’s inflated expenses while couples are getting the luxury of sharing those expenses. Make things a little easier on your single friends and family! It can be really hard sometimes. If you let your single friend pay a little less than everyone else, just let it go or don’t travel with them. Signed a formerly single person now living with her partner. I know how much it sucks being the only single person in a group of couples who get to share expenses.
This! Singles already have higher costs in general as they’re not splitting any expenses with anyone. For example, in my area a one-bedroom apartment is about $1800 but a two bedroom apartment is about $2200. So, I pay $1800 for rent while my coupled friends pay $1100 per person for rent. Some utilities are scaled to the size of the apartment, but others (like wifi) aren’t, so I’m paying $60 for wifi but my coulpled friends are paying $30 for wifi. I often have to overbuy groceries / have food waste because stuff isn’t scaled for one person. I live in an area where pretty much everyone needs a car, but couples only need one car; so I pay car payment, insurance, maintenance, and gas on my own while my coupled friends split that in two.
I make good money, but I’l never be able to buy a house on my own in my HCOL. Almost all of my married friends own houses.
This is purely financial, not even getting into the emotional side of being single.
There’s already a single tax. No need to exacerbate it to your friends.
Yeah exactly – I am very glad my single friends are in my life and feel no need to stick it to them on the “fairness” of how we split vacation rental housing. Life’s too short to try and make a point about this or do the mental gymnastics that some commenters have made to conclude that anything but per-room split means couples are “subsidizing” single people. And if the budget is so tight that this makes a huge difference to you, maybe you can’t afford this trip and should find a different way to do it or pass.
I agree with you on the wiggle room, but I’d feel weird if all my married friends were thinking “Oh poor Anecdata, she’s single so she needs a financial boost”. I have married friends who are extremely high income DINKs, and I also have married friends who both work for peanuts at non profits and are paying more in daycare than I am in rent.
It sounds as simple as getting a roommate in that $2200 2 bedroom. You can split the cost of all the utilities and groceries too.
Not making your friends subsidize your vacation to make up for the “singles” tax.
Honestly, they can split the rooms anyway they want but as a single person its honestly not going to be in my budget to come so I will have to bow out.
This right here.
A few years ago we got some friends together and rented a villal in Tuscany. My husband and I got the best room because we were the organizers, and left it to the other guests and the guide to fight it out with respect to the rest of the rooms. To my delight, although the married couples did their best to screw over the singles, through the magic of vague descriptions of the rooms on the web site, combined with unclear photos, both singles ended up with way better rooms that the couples. Heh.
Hopefully an easy cooking and food storage question – I need to start eating better meaning more home cooked whole foods. Because I don’t cook much and am also not interested in buying lots of produce and having it spoil, I’m hoping to do some meal prep so I can pull things out of the freezer and make a meal quick. But IDK what makes sense.
Question – can you saute things like bell peppers or onions in advance and throw that in the freezer? I’m not a foodie at all so it won’t bother me if things are soggy though if there is some way to avoid that, that’d be fine too. I feel like I can buy things like paneer or tofu and I’d be more likely to make them into a stir fry if I had precooked veggies in the freezer and could just combine and heat everything up.
Do you freeze things in individual Tupperwares because otherwise if you saute up 3 peppers and 3 onions, it’ll all freeze together and you won’t be able to pull one serving out? Or does it work more like frozen store bought vegetables where stuff won’t freeze together? Any other freezer hacks esp for someone who is more vegetarian?
Freeze in single servings – in your regular home freezer, stuff will stick together. Ziplocs are good and you can freeze them flat/stackable
I’d just buy packaged frozen veggies and call it a day. In my experience frozen veggies defrost quickly when stir frying so I wouldn’t call it a time saver to precook, then freeze, then defrost if you’d still have to stir fry with the tofu. All of the steam in the bag veggies are a cinch too—much faster than steaming fresh produce.
This. Frozen veggies are your friend here. I sautee from frozen and add just a little bit of water to the pan if they need help thawing quickly (with a lid for the first couple of minutes).
+1 comnmercially frozen veggies are much better than veggies you freeze yourself. You don’t have the commercial equipment to do it right at home.
Yes, and you can specifically buy a frozen bag of sliced, mixed peppers and onions.
If you like soups, they sell trays where you can freeze blocks of soup like ice cubes. Thaw as many or as few as you need. I’m not sure how much time you save heating up cooked, frozen veggies versus heating up uncooked, frozen veggies. I’d just just buy the uncooked, frozen veggies and save myself the time to precook and freeze them. Precooked veggies would probably clump together unless you froze them in an individual layer first and then put them into a bag/container.
I am vegetarian, not a foodie, and don’t like to cook. So I cannot help with your request for freezer hacks. But, as to the bell peppers and onions, I absolutely would buy the frozen ones. Someone else has already done the work to cut them up and freeze them. You’re not saving yourself any time or probably money by doing it yourself.
Also, Costco sells a bag of flamed grilled veggies that are frozen. Brand is Pura Vida. I like those.
For onions, I dice them up in a big batch and wrap them (raw) in freezer paper, usually 1/2 or one onion per packet. Put all the little packets in a ziploc in the freezer. If you’re cooking with them, it’s quick to thaw in the microwave or they go into soups frozen and thaw when cooked.
(Minor tangent to sing the praises of freezer paper here. I also make packets of meat in different cuts when I buy the value pack. For example, tonight we are having a sheet pan dinner that involves chicken cut into cubes that will be thawed for dinner, I’ll coat it in a balsamic-based marinade, then spread onto a pan with mushrooms and diced potatoes, bake for 30 minutes.)
For peppers and other vegetables, I love the frozen ones from Trader Joe’s. They have a package of tri-color pepper strips that are perfect for stir-fry dishes.
If you really want to pre-cook veggies to freeze and then stir fry later, you should consider blanching them rather than fully cooking them. Blanching is basically chopping and then flash-boiling them, draining them and then quickly cooling them. They aren’t fully cooked but will finish cooking when you do your stir fry later. This helps keep the texture from getting mushy or too soggy.
The frozen veggie mixes from the store are much easier for stir frying, though. Just toss them from the freezer straight into a very hot pan, no thawing required. Definitely don’t rinse them under running water until thawed like my DH insisted on doing when we first met – that is how you get wet, soggy stir fry.
I eat a lot of onions and peppers and find that both last for quite a while without freezing (onions in the pantry, peppers in the fridge). I always cook the whole onion (or two or three), and that will last at least a week in the fridge, though I freeze if it will be longer, in a ziploc thin enough that you can just break off pieces if you don’t want to thaw the whole thing. I generally prefer my peppers raw, but chopped peppers seem to be okay for 3-5 days in the fridge, and a few days longer if cooked (your fridge and produce may vary). I find frozen peppers too mushy, but if you’re okay with that, I’d probably just buy them frozen to begin with. I’m a big fan of frozen corn, peas, spinach, edamame, and anything else where the mushiness isn’t a problem.
Why not keep buying frozen store bought vegetables? If anything they’re probably a little more nutritious than buying vegetables at the store, cooking, and freezing them yourself since they were usually frozen them right away at peak freshness. They definitely sell frozen onions and peppers at the stores near me.
Vegetarian who loves my freezer. I love freezing leftovers (curries, soups, lentils, pasta sauce, etc) in glass jars (like the kind used for making one’s own jam) because I can just take off the lid and pop the jar in the microwave without having to plan ahead to defrost. The Ball website and most 12 packs of jars have a chart showing which ones are more freezer-safe. For best results, I like the kinds without shoulders. But, I’ve also had reused pasta sauce jars work well for ages. Use the size of jar that is suitable for one meal for you.
+1 to frozen veggies as your friend.
I freeze homemade stock in Ball jars all the time. Just make sure you understand head space! I’ve learned the hard way too many times.
Until I tasted it, I thought that citrus and yogurt sound disgustingly incompatible, but on my sister’s recommendation, I tried a peeled, chopped orange w unsweetened greek yogurt. Add in all the juice that is extracted during the chopping process. It’s quite delicious and oranges are a fairly safe fruit for those who are concerned with sugars.
If you eat plain yogurt, can you give me suggestions for how you eat it esp. if you have ideas that don’t add too much sugar? In my south Asian culture, plain yogurt with white sugar dumped on it is a thing. But I’m trying to gather suggestions for a family member who needs to cut sugar asap due to a prediabetes concern. Yogurt is plenty healthy but not with white sugar mixed in.
Would things like cinnamon or coffee or vanilla extract be good in plain yogurt? Just looking for things that cut the tangy nature of it and give it some other flavor.
I add chia seeds, berries, and chopped pecans. Raspberries have a pretty low glycemic index and a lot of fiber.
would sugar-free jello pudding work? that’s a popular one i see on tiktok. powdered peanut butter also… not sure about different protein powders. maybe a sugar-free hot cocoa mix too?
I put sugar-free vanilla syrup (the kind they make for coffee) in my Greek yogurt, along with an ounce of toasted slivered, almonds or berries
I also do plain yogurt. First, yogurt with fat in it tastes better than fat free. Definitely recommend either whole milk yogurt or whole milk and fat free mixed together. Second, I like to put a bowl of frozen fruit on my counter, let it defrost, and then stir in yogurt. The sweetness and juice from the defrosted fruit accomplish what you’re looking for. Third, I will add a few drops of liquid stevia and mix with the yogurt (cuts the tangy, but doesn’t change the flavor though). Last, I like adding cool coffee to plain yogurt and mixing well, but I pretty much love all things coffee flavored.
I should have clarified. I don’t do all of these things for the same bowl of yogurt. These are my various recipes.
I add frozen raspberries or blueberries and sometimes sprinkle cinnamon on top.
+1 to frozen fruit. I like to warm up frozen peaches or cherries in the microwave and then add the yogurt.
-vanilla protein powder (1/2 scoop) added also gives extra protein
-fresh fruit low on the glycemic index (berries of all types)
I LOVE plain yogurt – been eating it my whole life pretty much and there are so many great things you can do with it. I prefer Greek-style but anything works with the below:
yogurt+:
– peanut butter/cocoa powder/splash of maple syrup
– almond butter/cinnamon/vanilla/little bit of honey or maple syrup
– well-mashed banana whipped with nut butter then into the yogurt; add nuts/raising/choc chips (bananas add natural sweetness)
-add melted chocolate atop any of these combos and freeze for an ice-cream like treat:)
My breakfast every single day is Fage Greek yogurt with a serving of a frozen berry medley and a little bit of granola. I used to put honey on it too but ran out once and started going without it and I didn’t notice the difference. I usually prep these on Sunday for the week, so the berries get un-frozen in the fridge, but if I’m making it morning of I microwave them for a minute first so they’re not frozen when I eat them.
This is me as well. If you make your own granola (SUPER EASY and it stores in a Tupperware for a week), you can control your sugar too. Some store bought granolas are like candy.
I like to top plain yogurt with a compote of berries with just a little honey and some lemon or orange peel. Purely Elizabeth brand keto granola is also very tasty and low in sugar without any stevia or other fake sweeteners.
I throw in fresh blueberries and bananas, and some kind of crunchy cereal like Alpen with no added sugar. I have also mixed in vanilla extract and cinnamon, or a squeeze of lemon and some splenda.
I go savory and make a dip for veggies or just eat it on its own. I add spices like dill or Penzey’s Greek blend or slice up some cucumbers and herbs with garlic or onion and spices (think raita or tzatziki).
Note that some yogurt is less tangy than other due to the active cultures; when I did a taste test years ago, I found that Fage was significantly less tart than the others I tried. I blend it with fruit in smoothies to avoid added sugar, but I’m not sure if adding fruit would be okay for your relative. You could also try a savory yogurt bowl – like https://www.skinnytaste.com/zaatar-roasted-carrot-and-chickpea-yogurt-bowls/
Cinnamon and vanilla extract would 100% work. Maple syrup or agave syrup may also be options. My favorite is plain or vanilla greek yogurt with fresh/frozen berries and a sprinkle of sliced almonds.
Splenda instead of sugar.
+1
This is what I do. And add lots of fresh blueberries, raspberries, strawberries, blackberries.
Or I buy the sugar free vanilla yogurt.
I like plain yogurt all on its own, but mixing in frozen blueberries cuts the tanginess back without adding processed sugar.
I tend to use plain yogurt as a sauce, or as an ingredient in sauce – like raita. I’m sure you’re familiar with that application.
But plain yogurt as a dish on its own is a bit to sour for me, to be honest. It might be OK in a parfait type situation with fruit and granola, but I can’t quite get all the way to just sitting down to a straight bowl of plain yogurt. I do like cottage cheese, though!
I like Greek full fat plain. I eat it with berries and a bit of granola for crunch. For sweetness, chopped mango is a great add in. Not sure if you’re looking to cut out all sugar or refined sugar, but Greek yogurt and honey is a classic.
A teaspoon of maple syrup or honey and some crushed pistachios. Or a spoonful of jam (and for more fun, get weird jam, not just strawberry or blueberry. I am currently using a rhubarb ginger jam, and have also enjoyed cherry chai). I also used to cut up oranges into tiny bits and add that + the pistachios (and also a sprinkle of Dutch hagelslag, but that probably is not addressing the sugar problem).
Oddly I find ALDIs house brand of Greek yogurt (Friendly Farms? Something like that) to be less sour than the Kirkland Greek yogurt.
I just use stevia instead of sugar. I like “stevia select” brand. It’s fine for my blood sugar and insulin. Doesn’t taste identical but it wasn’t hard to get used to either. Yes to also adding vanilla extract if I’m in the mood, or something fruity or citrusy, or if it’s thick whole milk Greek yogurt, even some cocoa powder.
I’m South Asian too and our family uses yogurt mostly in savory dishes, like raita. Dahi bhat may be a good alternative for a breakfast food.
Different south asian here – I haven’t had dahi bhat, but isn’t it yogurt with rice? IDK but given how much rice we eat in south asian culture anyway, I don’t think adding rice to breakfast is necessarily a great idea if prediabetes is a concern. Frankly I sometimes eat raita for breakfast. My parents eyeroll because it isn’t breakfast food but it’s a healthy way to consume plain yogurt with just salt, ginger, garlic, cumin. If eggs can be a breakfast food and they’re savory, I’ve never understood why raita can’t besides just tradition.
I put cinnamon and/or cardamom.
I love plain yogurt as is, and most often eat it plain. I prefer the full fat ones, but like like the two percent Greek as well, but not less than that.
I’m happy to eat mine with a little olive oil as a savoury yogurt, as well.
For versions with something sweet:
cinnamon and dried dates, figs or raisins
blueberries
strawberries
banana cut in pieces
oatmeal or chia seeds for overnight oats
any frozen berries or fruit added overnight
bees’ pollen
hemp hearts, almonds, sunflower seeds
compote of some kind, if I have leftover fruit I might stew them
applesauce
IMO, pure flavorings like cinnamon, vanilla don’t taste good to me in unsweetened yogurt without also adding something else to cut the sweet. Some things I like are :
– Peanut butter/almond butter/something with fat
– adding yogurt to oatmeal instead of milk
– Nuts/berries/granola
– Honey instead of sugar – it kind of stays in globs ribbons, and I like the contrast with the tangy yogurt
– Preserves/fruit jam – can look for low sugar varieties
Until I tasted it, I thought that citrus and yogurt sound disgustingly incompatible, but on my sister’s recommendation, I tried a peeled, chopped orange w unsweetened greek yogurt. Add in all the juice that is extracted during the chopping process. It’s quite delicious and oranges are a fairly safe fruit for those who are concerned with sugars.
There are some varieties of yogurt that are less tangy or sour. They taste more milky
Pavel’s is one and Alexandre full fat yogurt may be another.
I love full fat plain Greek yogurt with chopped up apples, chopped walnuts, and maybe a tiny bit of honey if I’m feeling particularly decadant. Any kind of berries in place of the apples are great, too.
I like Icelandic yogurt (Skyr) which is similarly high protein to Greek yogurt but much less tangy. I make a grain free granola (the base is flaked coconut and slivered almonds) to put on top of it, and it’s delicious. I wear a continuous glucose monitor periodically and have found that is a great snack for keeping solid blood sugar. I have even found that I can get away with adding a small amount of something sweet – lemon curd is a favorite – without having a blood sugar spike. Adding blackberries is also delicious. Sometimes I’ll mix in vanilla protein powder to really keep my blood sugar in check.
Raita.
Curd rice and dal or saambar
South Indian curd rice and pickle.
Random question: Is there anything you wish your mother in law did or didn’t do on your wedding day? Assumption is that the mil to be is wearing a dress/shoes/hair/makeup that met prior bridal approval, has given a few thousand to the wedding fund no strings attached, has provided all information asked for cheerfully and asap, and has had the hard conversations with members of the groom’s family about no plus ones for the random cousins and no kids being allowed. Said mil doesn’t drink, so getting sloppy drunk is pretty much out of the question. Asking for a friend.
Sounds like a great MIL! The only thing I can think of is just compliment the bride and tell her how nice everything is, and how much you’re enjoying the wedding even if it’s not really true. My grandmother was famously b1tchy but she didn’t say a single nice thing to me on my wedding day (not even “you look nice” or “you and your husband are a great couple”), and it still stings 20 years later.
Mine was great. I married her only child.
Sounds like a dream MIL, too good to be true. I guess the only thing not mentioned here is politics, so no conspiracy theory rants, but the type of person you’re describing probably doesn’t need to be told that.
My MIL was a dream at my wedding & did all of these things, plus gave a lovely speech congratulating her son & welcoming me to the family.
My MIL called me “everything you want for your son” and I still think about it all the time (and stole the wording to welcome my brother-in-law to the family a few years later, calling him everything I wanted for my sister).
That is so sweet. I need to save it up for when my daughter’s boyfriend finally becomes my son in law. (99% sure it is going to happen)
If your friend is the mother in law in this story, it sounds like she’s doing great!
FWIW, my advice for all social situations is a sincere handwritten note is essentially never unwelcome. So if your friend is worried about figuring out how to communicate her goodwill and love for her new daughter in law, a card saying exactly that – it’s been a joy to get to know you, I love having you in our family, etc – is hard to go wrong with
I wish my FIL and MIL had the sense to see that her son and DIL were being passive aggressive jerks to us and kibboshed it. All “kids” were late 30s, so well beyond any point at which it was acceptable.
Re-reading this and maybe it needs a bit more explanation:of course, we are grown adults who can set boundaries. The issue was that they got together as a couple about 20 years before we did. I was the new person, who was caught between not wanting to cause a scene with my brand-new in-laws and not wanting to be crapped on. They were the long-established couple and SIL was playing family gatekeeper.
I really wish someone had grabbed them by the scruff of the neck and said, “Lydia is now part of the family, and she isn’t lesser because she got married later. KNOCK IT OFF before this causes a permanent rift.”
My MIL has passed now and I miss her in so many ways. I wish I had taken more time with her that day. In fact, I didn’t really get to know her until a year or so into being married (she lived states away) and she became my go-to phone bestie. Anytime anything really good happens or really bad, she’s the first person I want to tell and I grieve all over again. I’ll never forget that she always sent us something on our anniversary based on the theme that year. It felt like she was rooting for us. Some of my friends will tell horror stories about their MILs (or worse, I see them as the root of friction), but I didn’t experience any of that. What I got was a best friend and time together that was way too brief. My advice would be to be open to wherever the relationship goes.
I have an absolutely lovely MIL who has a resting mean face and doesn’t like to smile in photos (no idea why). I truly hit the jackpot with her, assume that she’s happy I married her son, and wish our photos didn’t have her looking like she’s at a funeral. Oh well!
Hold off on any complaints or criticisms during the day. The first thing my MIL said to us after we got pictures, and right before we saw our guests, was an angry complaint about how the band was way too loud. Would love to not have that memory (she is generally a lovely person but my husband and I joke her love language is complaining).
This. My MIL complained that we were getting married outdoors at a hotel and not at a church (even though our pastor – the officiant – was totally fine with that) and that therefore God was not going to bless our wedding. Also not happy that my mom got to wear certain colors but she did not (no one said she couldn’t, she just assumed). Also complained that the hair and makeup person I hired put too much makeup on her and her sister. Between MIL and my own mom, I was crying on my own wedding day because I’m a people pleaser and I felt I was disappointing everyone.
Oh that’s a good point. My (thankfully -ex) MIL had a mug on her all day because we weren’t getting married in “her” church. She also made comments about it to guests who were my friends, people she didn’t even know, so of course I got to hear all about it later.
She was the original Church Lady, spent a lot of time ‘volunteering’ at her church – as bossy as she was I really wonder how welcome her efforts were – and as a result seemed to feel like she owned the place. My ex and I got married in my hometown as my dad was terminally ill and could barely make it across town to the wedding, much less to another city a 7 hour drive or a plane ride away. But sure, Marian, make it about you.
Heh, some of my in-laws were pissy that I didn’t get married in THEIR hometown. I’m from Chicago, moved to Nashville with H, and H is from Columbia SC. My family paid for the entire wedding and then some. Didn’t stop a bunch of nasty comments about not getting married in Columbia.
Thank you for sharing this! I was the only person I knew who had “MIL trauma” on my wedding day. Mine was worse, but I’ll spare everyone the details…
Group photos of the extended family are fine and welcome, but please don’t take over and turn family photos into a whole lengthy shoot that takes away from other moments.
Ah that happened at my niece’s wedding. I guess her new husband’s family wanted to get their Christmas card picture taken, but why wouldn’t their son’s new wife be in it? It took a long time, and I felt so bad for my niece just standing off to the side that my kids and I finally went over and took a bunch of selfies with her.
Don’t pressure an introverted bride into doing lots of “look at me!” dances or reception activities that make her super uncomfortable just because it’s “tradition.” (e.g., the dollar dance in the Midwest). I flat-out refused for a number of reasons, and my normally reasonable ILs were appalled. YOU’RE TURNING AWAY ALL THAT MONEY AND THE CHANCE FOR PEOPLE TO DANCE WITH YOU AND SAY HI. We made the rounds to all the tables to talk to people, so that was such an unfounded weird thing to fixate on.
Oh this brings back memories. My mom complained that we did not throw the bouquet (I had no desire to single out my single friends) and also complained that we weren’t serving the cake yet and their friends wanted to leave. She also told their friends they could leave and take their centerpieces home and it was still an hour or so before the end of the reception.
Pro tip: if you have kids at the wedding (totally understand if you do not), throw the bouquet to the little girls. Huge hit.
My own mother is still fixated on the fact that my sister wasn’t plucked from the gaggle of bridesmaids to be in some “family” pictures. It was a total oversight but it’s still A Thing with my mom.
I wish my MIL hadn’t driven everyone nucking futs while we were trying to do hair and makeup (I paid for everyone in the bridal party to get both done in one place). It got so bad that I had to get my bridesmaids to escort her from the room because I was going to lose my mind or bolt, or both. She was bouncing around like a top asking me when “her” grandchildren were arriving because I wasn’t getting any younger. It would have been nice if she’d just excused herself at a reasonable interval.
While I’d helped her pick out an appropriate dress, I wish she had gotten it altered so she didn’t show quite so much plunging cleavage.
My Mother in Law cried and said my now husband and I were “incapable of compromise” because we didn’t want to do a choreographed bollywood dance routine at out wedding. She then, behind my back, involved members of my extended family in a “surprise” dance performance on the day.
So … don’t do that? Your friend sounds lovely and the fact she’s worrying about this at all makes it sounds like she will be a delight on the day itself.
I’m debating about trying Botox or Dysport for my forehead lines. I’ve had a line across my forehead since late high school-early college, but it’s now very noticeable in my late 30s, and I’m seeing two more forehead lines coming in.
It turns out that basically every woman I know gets some form of injectables, and I notice that they all look great! It’s not an unnatural tightness or weird plastic look, they just look like they have exceptionally healthy and smooth skin.
I’ve asked them about their routines, and they all say botox, with the occasional laser or other intense facial.
So, how do I go about finding a good test provider to decide if this is something I want to add to my regular routine? Their providers are over an hour away from me, so I’m not inclined to go all the way to their part of town.
Any other facials that you’ve done that produced great results?
And finally, is it worth switching to medical grade skincare products? I feel like my skin is generally healthy and clear, but I’m harsh on it (I spend a lot of time doing ocean sports, so salty water and sun are rough on my face), so I’m also a bit hesitant to add anything that makes me super sensitive to the sun (I use strong sunscreen daily + reapply, and I’m already using actives like vitamin C, salicylic acid, and .25 retinol).
Sunscreen and tretinoin are the most effective skincare.
In terms of botox, I no longer get it, but I did for 10 years and I miss it! At first, I went to the guy one of my friends recommended (he’s famous in my city), then I got my regular dermatologist to do it when I was visiting her anyway. Then she stopped offering it, so I switched to another famous person closer to my home, then I finally stopped. I stopped mainly because I wanted to save money, and I’m 10+ years older now so I decided to just age. But I do miss the smooth, calm feeling a little botox between my brows gave me.
Sounds like you’re doing great on skincare. Maybe add eye cream (I like Neocutis) and a peptide (Medik8). I do a hydra facial seasonally and am currently doing a series of BBL/Moxi lasers.
For the Botox I go to a place that that’s all they do- inject all day long. All are nurses, most NPs. But unlike a plastic surgeon or dermatologist this is all they do so they are very good at it. Can you search on Instagram for providers close to you? And scheduling a consultation can be really helpful before making any decisions.
My niece is graduating from high school and will be going to a colder climate for college. When asked for suggestions on a graduation gift, she wants a new comforter. Where would a teen buy a comforter these days? Pottery Barn? I want to get something decently nice, but everything that goes into dorm rooms is likely going to have a short lifespan so I don’t want to go overboard either.
The Company Store?
Does she need twin XL? If so, that severely limits options. If not, I enjoy my Ikea duvet.
There’s a decent chance she will want to coordinate with her roommate to be (a mistake in my view but lots of girls disagree). I would pass on room decor in favor of boots or a coat/jacket or similar.
I definitely wanted to pick out my own comforter/bedding because I love decor, but I never coordinated with my roommate. Since the niece is suggesting a comforter as a gift, I don’t think she cares to pick it out.
Not pottery barn, but pottery barn teen. Please go with this: Marshmallow Jersey Quilt from Pottery Barn Teen. I’m so tempted to get the tie dye one just to have around for an extra big couch blanket.
Dorm beds are typically Twin XL fwiw. My daughter is just finishing her first year of college and her comforter came from PB Teen. It’s holding up fine. She’s moving to an apartment with a full bed next year, so we’re passing the dorm bedding on to a friend.
Pick something that won’t show stains easily and looks nice on a twin size mattress. My freshman roommate insisted we buy matching white comforters…and it looked like a decade old hospital bed by fall break. If she wants something bold or colorful check out Deny Designs on Wayfair or Bed Bath and Beyond.
The only thing that would make cinder block walls look even more sad is a white comforter, imo!
FWIW, my university had XL twin beds and I loved having a full-sized comforter. It was more to curl up in, and worked out well when I moved off campus and got a full-sized bed.
Since we’re on the topic of botox/injectables, I was wondering if anyone had any experience with tightening their jaw line. I feel like I am developing jowls. I am also looking into botox for my “11” lines.