Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Ponte Flare Pant
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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
When I bought my first pair of Spanx in 2008 to help smooth things out under a bridesmaid dress (they were promptly ditched in a bathroom trash can at the reception, in case you were wondering), I never would have believed you if you'd told me that the company would eventually end up selling some of my favorite pants.
Unlike the shapewear, I find the clothing to be super comfortable, plus they’re machine washable and the pants come in a wide range of sizes and inseams. I’m leaning toward these poppy-colored flares as the next ones to add to my collection.
I would probably pair this bold color with a navy or camel sweater, but they do have a button-up blouse in a similar color if you’re really leaning in.
The pants are $158 at Spanx and come in sizes XS-3X with petite, regular, and tall inseams.
Sales of note for 2/6:
- Nordstrom – End of Season Sale — winter styles up to 50% off!
- Ann Taylor – End of season sale, up to 70% off original prices — plus extra 25% off your $175+ purchase.
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off + extra 15% off
- Brooks Brothers – Clearance up to 70% off
- Elie Tahari – Great sale, up to 60% off! This reader-favorite sleeveless silk blouse is down to $50 from $198
- Express – $40 off $120, $75 off $200 (online only).
- J.Crew – Up to 40% off winter classics, + extra 30% off sale styles with code
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything + extra 50% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Valentine's sale, up to 50% off — reader favorites include this laptop tote, this backpack, and this crossbody
- M.M.LaFleur – Save up to 70% off, dozens of styles now on clearance. Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
- Neiman Marcus – New sale arrivals, up to 40% off. You can also earn a $35-$700 gift card with purchase of $250-$3000.
- Talbots – Free shipping on $150+, and members earn 3X style points.
PSA: be careful cooking on a gas stove when wearing loose clothing. Yesterday my sweatshirt caught fire cooking dinner. I froze and couldn’t react or remember to use water or stop drop and roll. Thankfully my husband was there and put it out for me. I don’t want to know what would have happened if he wasn’t there.
Sound advice and I’m glad you’re okay!
I’m glad you’re ok!
Oh gosh, I’m so glad you’re ok! We have a fire blanket in a closet right off our kitchen and our teenagers are the ones who pushed for it after seeing it on social media. It’s a lot more user friendly than a fire extinguisher imho and especially great for grease/stove fires.
I bought one last night after this happened. I didn’t even know how to use a fire extinguisher and it was spreading so fast I had no time to think.
That is so scary – glad you are ok! I am going to get one too. My 13 year old son loves to cook and I just realized this would be good to have after reading your post so thanks for sharing!
To all readers: This is your sign to check the expiration dates and locations of all your fire extinguishers, replace or add if necessary, and refresh your knowledge of how to use them!
I used a fire extinguisher to put out what would have turned into a catastrophic fire while my husband literally ran around in circles panicking. He could not think to grab a fire extinguisher or to get people and the dog out of harm’s way or even to call 911; he just ran around yelling that the house was going to burn down. Don’t be that person. Mentally rehearse what you’d do in an emergency ahead of time.
Heck, you can go beyond the mental prep and spend a few minutes role playing with your whole family. Pick a scenario, act out, and talk through what needs to happen.
There was a very bad car accident in front of our house last summer and I was so proud of how my whole family reacted smoothly in the moment. My spouse extracted the unconscious driver from the burning vehicle and got them a safe distance away, my teenager retrieved our kitchen fire extinguisher and knocked the flames down, I called 911 and directed looky-loos into useful action (you in the hat – hold onto the loose dog, you from the truck – watch for the first responders and direct them here when they show up, you with the pink purse – go get a blanket to keep the driver warm, you on the bike – help keep the onlookers on that side of the road so they don’t crowd the EMTs).
This is good advice. A neighbor had a tree branch come down on wires and start an electrical fire, and DH was able to help stop the fire from spreading to a neighbor’s car thanks to having a fire extinguisher and knowing how to use it. There’s not a ton of time to think while it’s happening! I didn’t remember.
BTW, directing lookie-loos is so important in any emergency – give specific people a useful task to break through panic and inertia, and ensure it doesn’t become “somebody was going to do it, so nobody did”.
I keep meaning to get one of those.
Bought each of my adult kids and myself a fire blanket for Christmas this year (we went with Prepared Hero as they were haunting me on SM) and keep it under the kitchen sink, right next to the fire extinguisher. They run deals all the time!
We recently had a small toaster fire and I also completely panicked/froze. It was my first experience with a fire, and it is so scary how fast it spreads. We ended up putting it out with a fire extinguisher, but it took me precious minutes to remember how to use it. If it had been a little longer, our kitchen cabinet would have caught fire and from there I don’t even want to imagine. So yeah, seconding your very important PSA and don’t ignore fire safety. Glad you are okay!
My next door neighbor didn’t know how one would put out a grease fire in the kitchen. “Just put water on it, right?” Um, no. This was something I learned in Home Ec, in the 80s. I’m only ten years older than she is. It’s amazing what people don’t know.
Hi wise Corporettes! I am so lucky to be expecting our second child (sex TBD) on Monday. Our first child (boy) has my husband’s last name, with my last name as one of two middle names. We are considering giving this second child my last name, with husband’s as a middle. My last name is unusual and slightly ethnic (Eastern European) and unlikely to be otherwise passed down by any other family members; my husband’s last name is more straightforward. Has anyone given their children two different last names – or considered doing so and decided against? Any considerations to weigh? Welcome all feedback!
I like the idea! Thing to consider is that people will likely initially assume that the kids are step- or half-siblings.
Yeah, this is the main downside (or they don’t realize they’re siblings at all if they only know them outside of the family context). I had a childhood friend whose family did this back in the 80s and other than some initial confusion about why her sister didn’t have the same name, it wasn’t a big deal.
I’d think about it from the kids’ point of view, as they’re growing up and as adults. Will it turn into a his/hers situation for the kids — one of them is “his” (your husband’s) and one yours? Will they enjoy being different from each other or feel weird about it? Will the one with the unusual name lean into it or resent spelling and explaining it often?
There’s no way to know the answers to those questions, because it will be relationship-dynamic driven, and you can’t predict what your kids’ personalities will be and what their relationship will be. But that’s what I’d be thinking about.
I’m southern and the middle name is where all of our matrilineal names go.
+1 – not southern but both our kids have my last as their middle, and I changed my middle to my maiden name when I got married. So me, and both kids are all the First Name Smith Jones.
Same. Don’t be weird to make a point you’ll regret later.
This sums up my feelings. Don’t be weird with your kids’ names; they are the ones who have to live with it.
agreed with this but why give him 2 middle names then? i thought the whole point is that there’s only one. when i took my maiden as my middle name i got rid of the other middle name.
+1 this is how my family does it
I have friends who have done this, so their names are: John Doe, Jane Smith, Bobby Doe Smith, Sally Smith Doe. I don’t think it has caused any issues for them, so if it feels right to you, I say go for it! My only consideration with this setup is that if you find it annoying when people misname you or your family members, then you’re creating more opportunities for people to not be able to keep everyone’s name straight. But since you already have different last names going on, presumably you are used to this and unfazed by it! if it were me, I would consider giving my in-laws a heads up to just so they’re not caught off guard after the baby is born.
There are a couple families at our school who have done this, and it seems totally fine for them.
I would not like having a different last name from my siblings.
Same.
Agreed. Make your family one unit. Why divide?
+1
If names is what makes or breaks your family bond then the bond must not be very strong
I hate that line of reasoning. Things can go sideways, really sideways, because life is long. If and when it does go sideways, do you need MORE piled on top of it?
Yep. My mother never changed her name after marriage but didn’t mind being called Mrs. X in informal situations. Even at my father’s funeral, she said, “[Her Firstname Lastname] loves [His Firstname Lastname].” Nobody cared.
My brother and I have the same hyphenated last name. It didn’t feel divisive growing up, but we grew up in an area where it is common to have 2 last names due to second wave feminism or the presence of many people from Latin American cultures. I can see young children and other people reading into it. “Love makes a family” isn’t just for adoptees, blended families, and the LGBTQ+ community. However, we did grow up in a big city, and things might have been different in a more traditional community.
100%
+1
I think this could cause confusion for others, and also feel like your family is somehow divided. Not a good idea.
Agreed. I think this is really not a good way to go.
Congratulations and good luck on Monday!
I kept my last name and have a different last name than my son does… but I would strongly advise against this. If you wanted to give your kids your last name, give all your kids your last name.
Give your second child your last name as a middle name, and just tell both kids that they are free to change their legal names at any point.
Honestly bonkers. And I say this as someone who kept my name. So confusing for the kids and no cohesion at home. Stick with the middle name convention.
+1
Oh i don’t like this at all. Admittedly I have four kids and they love being a unit. They make up team nicknames with their last name and things like that. They would not like to have different last names!
When teachers get a younger sibling, they know immediately and it’s a fun thing. Not sure coaches would ever catch on if they had different last names, though classroom teachers would. School carpool line you get a sign with the kids’ last name for pickup. Would be two names?
My kids love being siblings and I think they like sharing a last name, at least as they grow up together.
Also fwiw my maiden name is waaay better than their dad’s name/their last name. But I still would never do it.
I also wouldn’t do this, but you do realize that having different last names would not make your kids any less of a unit… They are still siblings.
But they wouldn’t still have the same last name, so they would be less of a unit when it comes to their last name.
It does though. It’s dividing them from the start for no good reason.
It absolutely makes them less of a unit to all normal people.
You can’t have it both ways, saying at once that their last names don’t matter (for social purposes), but saying that those names do matter (for whatever reason prompts you to do this).
Devil’s advocate, but my younger siblings all hated being clocked as my younger sibling because they didn’t like that baggage that came from being my sibling and they wanted to be their own people and form their own first impressions.
Same in my family.
Are you notorious in some way?
I think it’s a bit odd. This is why we hyphenated our kids’ names. This way they have the same last name as each other, and we each contributed to their last name. We love it.
Hyphenating makes it weird for them and their partners when they get married. No one is going to be Smith-Jones-Adams. Just pick a last name.
I have seen that though. IIrC they were from the UK. I don’t know what you do beyond that though.
Look up Spanish naming customs.
Child’s last name: Father’s first surname + mother’s first surname.
(In other words, the first surname is always a patrilineal surname.)
Now, the child can have either the mother or the father’s first surname first, but the siblings must all have the same last name.
Yep. I grew up in the southwest, where my hyphenated last name was not a problem due to the common use of Spanish naming customs. It wasn’t until I left for the east coast in an area with fewer Spanish speaking residents that someone at the DMV only put one last name on my ID, creating problems at the airport.
You’re assuming my daughters, who have hyphenated last names, will further hyphenate to include their future husband’s last name, but why would they? I didn’t change my last name when I got married.
In terms of their future children, I take your point, but they can cross that bridge at a later date. They can just drop one of their last names and hyphenate with their future spouse, or their future children can take my kids’ hyphenated last name, or the future spouse’s name, or whatever they want to do. It’s not the end of the world.
Since this is second kid, I would use the same name as sibling.
I know a few people who have chosen to switch their middle and last names as adults, to keep the more rare family name “alive” and that has worked out well.
My BFF did this and I love it. I only have one kid and she has my last name but if I had a second one, they likely would have had their dad’s last name.
My child does not share a last name with either her father or her stepfather (or her stepmother for that matter) and it has never presented any logistical difficulties. She knew who her parents were (and a stepparent) before she learned to say or spell her last name.
I had a different last name than all of my parents growing up (long story) and it didn’t change anything. I know a family where one child has a different last name that everyone else in the family (she has her bio-dad’s last name but has not seen him since she was a baby) and it’s not weird.
We call our selves the LN1-LN2 family on holiday cards and invites, never get offended if someone gets a last name wrong, and it otherwise never comes up.
My daughter did what you are suggesting with her kids and it has worked out fine, no issues.
I respect why you want to do it but I wouldn’t do it myself and don’t think I would like it as one of the kids. It creates divisions, for better or worse. I kept my last name and there really is a hit to feeling like a unit.
I don’t have any strong feelings on what other people do, but I did want to chime in that having kids with different last names is really not a big deal. It doesn’t discourage them from being a unit or a team. Truly, that’s all in the parenting and in their personalities. My kids have different dads and different last names, and they are honestly obsessed with each other. We do what we can to encourage that, but it’s also just who they are. Everyone important in their lives knows they’re siblings because they talk about each other all the time. It’s 2026, and half my kids have friends whose families do not have everyone in the household sharing the same name. Usually, but not always, it’s mom with a different name but I’ve seen it all. It’s never been an issue.
I think the key distinction here is your kids actually have different dads are are actually a blended family.
This to me is normal with different dads but bonkers with the same dad.
I know a family that did this and I like it.
However, if there’s any chance your kids have another citizenship or you guys might move abroad as a family, I’d do some research first to make sure you don’t needlessly complicate kid’s life. For example, in Germany, kids of the same parents all legally have the same last name as the eldest kid for things like identity documents (at least for citizens–no clue how this works for foreigners living in Germany on a permanent basis). It would be challenging to have a different last name on one’s US identity documents than on one’s other country identity documents.
This is probably accurate. At least when I got married in Germany 18 years ago, for the marriage certificate, IIRC we had to decide on a name for the family, as well as for any kids, even though each spouse could have kept their own name.
I believe you can change that later, but the administration did ask which name the family should use going forward.
I wouldn’t use your kid to make a statement.
This.
Fine for pets but not people. You’ll just give your kids one more thing to fight over and lack cohesion about. You want your kids to be a team, teams share names. One of the coolest things I had growing up was being one of the “Smith Sisters,” – my siblings changed their names when they married but we still connect over being Smiths.
This is so bizarre to me, honestly. a name doesn’t create cohesion, and the lack of a shared name doesn’t erode it.
Thank you for all of the thoughtful comments – especially around alerting the in-laws, implications for future citizenship, etc! We have a lot to think about!
Emily Oster’s parents did this.
For a variety of reasons, we have three different last names between adults and kids in my family and it’s never caused a single issue.
This happens all the time with divorced and blended families.
I don’t think this is a big deal logistically or socially.
I always love a naming thread to remind myself how conservative this board is
Just because something is traditional doesn’t make it bad.
I like the idea! Especially if it resonates with you. Families don’t all need to have the same last name (mine doesn’t now, and it didnt when I was a kid either. My sister and I don’t share last names at birth) I think people have a lot of traditional-ish ideas about this but in practice if you like the idea, doing it this way won’t actually change much in the scheme of things.
I think it’s a great idea and with all the different varieties of families these days, it will be less and less of an issue as the kids grow older.
Agree
This is obviously only a personal opinion but there is something special about creating a family unit and that unit having the same name that identifies them to others. Everyone will assume these kids aren’t related or are step-siblings. Invitations will be addressed wrong. I would give this second child the same naming structure as the first. No reason to complicate things for you and the children to make some odd point. My last name (also Eastern European and very unique/misspelled in English) dies with me as an only child and I’m fine with that. I made it my middle name when I got married and now never use it anyway. I kind of wish I kept my original middle name.
I’ve done it both ways (didn’t change my last name in my first marriage; changed it for my second/current marriage because it was important to my husband for reasons). Creating a family was no less special for the lack of sharing a name. Also, who cares if people assume the kids are half or step-siblings?
Which marriage ended though?
Lol – I can assure you my first spouse didn’t pass away because I didn’t change my last name.
My husband wishes we had done this. Neither of our two kids has my last name except as a middle name that is basically never used.
I’m pretty sure a regular moms page poster did this.
I have a different last name than my kids and when they talk about themselves as a group, they call themselves “The MyLast TheirLast Kids.” It’s not our legal family name, but rather how they’ve always thought of themselves as a unit. Which is all to say – I don’t think it’s about the name, but about the family spirit.
I go back to you thought about wanting to pass down your unusual last name – I think that’s a beautiful sentiment.
(Okay, I just asked my 13 year old if she would think it strange to have a different last name than her brother and she said, “Well, I might wonder if you had an affair at some point, but if it’s what we grew up with, I probably would be used to it.”
Further to the conversation about litigation related to surgeries on minors yesterday, the American Society of Plastic Surgeons now opposes surgical transition of children due to insufficient evidence of benefit before 19: https://www.washingtonpost.com/health/2026/02/03/plastic-surgeons-youth-gender-surgeries-guidance/
Cowards. They should have done this long before a lawsuit exposed members to ruinous liability.
Yup. They will absolutely claim we didn’t know but luckily, we have receipts.
My sense is because the verdict is so recent, this has probably been in the works for some time.
Exactly. These types of changes do not usually happen this fast (unless it is being driven by political appointees but that does not really apply to this organization). I suspect this was driven more by the Cass Report, which is generally viewed as an apolitical and science driven review of the current evidence, and has been in the works for a while.
There’s insufficient evidence of benefit ever but will take the win (although this is just a CYA move since the professional associations are afraid of liability now – they’ve known the evidence issues for years). The NYT deigned to report on it this time too.
Oh good, that will help the woman who was convinced that if the NYT doesn’t report on it, it’s not important.
That is sensible. The Dutch study was anecdotal evidence from a small number of patients. It reminded me of the small oyx study that for some reason had doctors prescribing opioids too often. Pharma company marketing should be better scrutinized by doctors.
It’s so surprising to me that liberals who critiqued big pharma for the opioid crisis jumped all in on big pharma providing hormone treatments and pushing experimental surgeries. Follow the money, people! I’m also mad at Planned Parenthood for going that route – our access to abortion is going to be even more threatened now that they’ve enmeshed the organization in such a high-risk, high-liability line of service.
Not only was it anecdotal, there was a significant loss to follow up, and a large portion of the participants were same-sex attracted. One of the participants died either on the operating table or shortly thereafter during the vaginoplasty, because the puberty blockers caused the penile tissue to not develop and there was not enough material to create a canal, so they used colon and it was fatal.
Plastic surgery is often reconstructive (after a dog bites you) or aesthetic (“fix” your nose, but the nose should function as a nose afterwards). But it’s not supposed to be like Van Gogh: cutting off a perfectly good ear. The “first do no harm” principle seems to have not been part of the convo for a long time or not to result in any critical inquiry on this front.
Does anyone have advice looking for a job in this AI world? How do I get my resume past the screens? I’m not even sure if I’m interacting with real recruiters on LinkedIn. What tools should I be using? It’s completely demoralizing so any “hang in there” is helpful too, thanks
If your resume isn’t getting you to the recruiter screen, keep working on it. Ask a Manager has good resources – you do not want to do an AI generated resume because it will be generic and not specific to your accomplishments (plus everyone else is using the same bullets). Remember that a perfect title match for past / current roles is going to be a huge, but not the only factor. I don’t really like LinkedIn premium but one thing it does do is that it has a AI feature where it’ll compare your profile to the job posting and tell you if you’re a high/medium/low match. I only apply to high/medium matches.
Same as it’s been, by networking and reaching real people. Also though, adjust your LinkedIn settings so recruiters can see you and make sure your job descriptions there use key words recruiters are looking for.
I’ve been deep in this world too. The best lessons I’ve learned are to:
*Narrow down on 1-2 types of roles you want; being open to everything is actually making you less hire-able
* Figure out the top keywords for the roles you want, and then use those terms in our LinkedIn Headline & About/Summary sections. For example, if you’re a data analyst, include terms like SQL, Python, Tableau, etc.
* It is worth it to align your resume to the keywords in the job posting so that your resume scores higher in the ATS
Wishing you (and me!) much success – this market is tough but I have faith that we’ll come out with better jobs.
In the AI world, you need to tailor your resume as closely as you can to each job description and highlight your relevant experience (and edit out what’s not relevant to a specific job). Use the same keywords that are in the job description when you can, so if the job description mentions “content strategy,” use that specific term, instead of something that’s a synonym. In the past, I was more concerned about tailoring my cover letter and reused my resume. Now you should tailor both.
Applying cold to opportunities is super competitive and in some ways a numbers game. Work away steadily at it, knowing that you will face rejection but your persistence will pay off overtime. Use LinkedIn, Indeed, and hiring.cafe to find opportunities. Also, check if a job is fully remote or hybrid, or remote to just a specific state or country, so you won’t waste time applying to a job that’s not actually a fit for you. A lot of people say networking is the only way, and if that’s your style, go for it. But I got a job offer from a major, well-known company by cold applying in 2025. So I think that’s a legitimate route if you’re able to keep at it.
I’m in the same boat; sending sympathy/solidarity. On a content note: One thing I’ve learned during this job search is to include metrics and outcomes in your resume bullets instead of duties and responsibilities. So not “Painted teacups” but “Painted X teacups per week” or “Painted teacups in X original designs; named Best Teacup Artist by Teacup Magazine.”
The best advice is to feed your resume + the job description into a couple LLMs and use the feedback to tailor your resumes. AI gets this done well. Go through a few cycles to get it right. I’ve gotten a decent response rate using this strategy.
For the “real recruiters” question/avoiding scams, I ask them to email me & check the domain name.
You can ask them upfront if they are in house, exclusively contracted for the role, or freelancing. Don’t work with freelancers who are just submitting your resume unsolicited.
(And this goes double for people who reach out to you claiming to be a recruiter as XYZ – check that they are actually sending emails from @xyz.com)
I think my grandmother had these pants in the 1970s.
They definitely brought to mind hippie beads and a floral sofa.
Also, they really just look like leggings with a faux seam up the front. I don’t get it.
I think the sewn-in seam is the dealbreaker for me.
These are a particularly egregious version, but I think ponte almost always looks cheap.
I definitely thought I was on an afternoon post and that these were athletic wear. I like some of Spanx’s clothing, but these pants ain’t it.
Yeah mine too. They’re awful and don’t even look good on the model.
Utterly hideous.
I think we have a few community theatre people here and I don’t want to ask anyone in real life, so here goes. What does one wear to a musical theatre audition that involves singing and dancing? For dance class I’d wear leggings and a workout tank. As a classical singer I vary my audition attire according to the formality of the gig, but I would never wear dance clothes. Do people change for the dance audition? Do they just wear athleisure for the whole thing? If so, what kind of athleisure allows the dance judges to see lines without being too fitted for singing?
Also, should I wear flat jazz shoes or character shoes? I predict that most roles will be performed in jazz shoes, but the two characters for which I am the most likely fit might be in heels.. I can dance in character shoes but am more comfortable in flat shoes.
Check out Elise Mestichelli and Mel Cabey on YT. They often post shorts on audition attire (singing and a variety dancing styles, albeit for Broadway/regional theatre).
Rehearsal attire is fine, and you should wear what will allow you to give your best performance. There’s a bit of “know your company”, as well. I’d be out of place if I was wearing dance wear and character shoes to my tiny town’s theater audition, but would be normal in the next larger city.
My daughter shows up to auditions for musical theater (including professional and community theater, and children’s shows) in her theater blacks and black jazz shoes – usually a slightly flared legging that is tight through to a slight kick at the end (so they don’t look like tights or dance wear), with a fitted black shirt, and jazz shoes. Hair is neat and pulled back from your face. You never want your clothing to be distracting or impede movement. You are striving to audition as a blank slate. Director should be able to imagine you in any capacity.
Just looked it up – she wears Old Navy High-Waisted PowerChill Crossover Flared Leggings for Girls, and then the shirt should not appear to be a leotard and should not be fitted. She wears the Short-Sleeve Softest Solid T-Shirt for Girls. Sometimes in a soft neutral color, depending on the show. Always flat black jazz shoes.
So she doesn’t look like she’s wearing dance clothes, but she can move and is neutral for the director.
This is a good rec.
I usually wear a black t-shirt or workout tank and a skirt, and then switch into leggings in the bathroom before the dance call. Most of theaters in my area do a block of vocal auditions and then a block of dance auditions, so there’s time to change, but you don’t need to go full-on leotard, tights, etc.
If there’s no time to change, everyone just wears workout clothes or dancewear.
I would bring tennis shoes, jazz shoes, and character shoes. The choreographer will usually tell you which shoes to wear when you walk into the room.
Do you think pants that are very fitted like this in the crotch/hips/rear/upper thighs are still in style? They look a few years old to me, but admittedly I always have felt uncomfortable in this style, so maybe I’m just hoping for it to go away….
I think they’re always in style if you’re hot.
Truth. Pants being in/out is always dependent on the body they are on.
Plenty of hot but not particularly stylish people around so not sure I agree.
Don’t think they’re in style and all I can think of is the “Im Fifty!” character from SNL but maybe they’re so out they’re back in?
There is a contingent of people looking for some variation on “yoga pants for work” and I think these pants are for them. I wouldn’t call these pants stylish. I also would never wear pants to work that reveal this much of my body. But bodies and jobs are different, so I hope this rec works for someone.
I don’t think they are at all stylish but attractive to men, yes.
They’re also great for us lesbians. Probably do nothing for gay men.
Because we now have an entire generation of women who have grown up with leggings as pants, I predict this look (alas) is here to stay. In my book, these pants are way too tight/revealing to pass for work trousers. But . . . again . . . alas.
I’m confused by these questions — ankle and skinny pants were in for the past 15 years. These are just coming back in style in the past few years. Ankle and skinny are out, if flares are out also then what are you wearing? Wide legs suck.
this caught my eye because of the nonsensical headline (thanks AI?) but shows flared pants on meghan markle…
https://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/lifestyle-buzz/meghan-markle-44-wore-leg-lengthening-jeans-from-the-denim-brand-bobbi-brown-68-says-has-an-amazing-fit/ar-AA1Vdgjy?ocid=msedgntp&pc=U531&cvid=6980f9b7e0db469faec9e31149a39dc6&ei=20
I think these are just fine with a longer blazer or top. As styled here, they are weird.
I have several pairs of Spanx pants, including these in black. Their ponte does not look or feel cheap in person but this specific pair is my least favorite because of the location of the seams (and the regulars are waaay too long but hemming them would ruin the flare and the petites are a tiny bit too short at 5’6″). I kept them as my travel pants for long flights but would otherwise have returned them.
That said I have their ponte kick flares and love them, as well as two pairs of their twill pants I got on Poshmark that are super comfortable and flattering.
What do you like and dislike about your current home floorplans? We are going to be buying a new home this year, and it’s so hard to judge what layouts simply show well but are not functional.
We have a bunch of tiny rooms that are all open to each other and it is the worst of both worlds. The formal dining room isn’t big enough for a table that will seat more than six. There are no walls to put furniture against. Neither the formal living room nor the family room has space for couches/chairs to seat more than three people. I like open floor plans, so I would prefer fewer, larger rooms.
Think long and hard about where your piano will fit and where you want it. It’s nice to have the piano in the main living area for parties, but if people actually practice it you may want it in a separate room, preferably with a door.
This is controversial. But I’m counting down the days until we move to a ground-floor flat in the city. I hate, hate, hate stairs – I’m always afraid I’m going to trip over the cat, or my sleepwalker kid is going to make his way to them, and my husband yelling things to me from another level drives me mad. I’m also really looking forward to the eat-in kitchen, so perhaps I’m just lazy but…
I have an old Victorian and I think it’s the perfect combo of open and closed. I can close the French doors, pocket doors, etc and have private rooms or open it all up for maximum cat activities. It’s good when my partner wants to watch tv and I want to craft or something, then I can close the doors and not have to deal with his noise, for entertaining we can open everything up. I do wish we had second floor laundry and Theoretically we could if I would sacrifice on my fancy shmancy machine and get a stacking set, but that’s not a compromise I’m willing to make.
You can get pretty fancy stacking sets these days. I have a full size, stacking set w steam etc on the second floor. Two floors down in the basement, I have an extra large capacity, basic set that can handle comforters and such. I love this set up.
We are slowly adding walls to our open concept first floor. First, we boxed in the office so that I could close the doors when I was on a call. Next, we will be building semi-permanent bookshelves to further define the living and dining areas. Eventually we will re-do the kitchen so it is enclosed and I don’t have to see the chaos when I’m sitting down to eat or when I’m trying to relax in the living room. I think that if you are impeccably neat you can have a beautiful open concept living/dining/kitchen, but with two teens that isn’t the way my house is. It is noisy and chaotic – anything that is out on a surface (counters, tables, etc) adds to the visual chaos. With no interior walls there is nowhere to hang artwork for your eye to have a place to land. Think long and hard and honestly about if your lifestyle supports the layout the house has.
With you on this. As we retire and think about downsizing, I cannot with all of the open floor plans. What has gotten us to 35 years of marriage is decent separation when he wants to watch a football game and I want peace and quiet to cook, or read, or relax. Our current house flows, but there is definite separation. Trying to find a suitable downsize is driving me crazy.
Looking for a home right now and one underrated thing is a true entryway – nothing worse than entering straight into the living room (which is what I have now) and having shoes and jackets cluttering up the visual lines. We just lost out on an offer for a home with a really nice foyer and I’m sad!
I commented below, but we decided to add a mudroom/laundry/half bath to our home just after the pandemic and being fed up with the way our home functioned. We literally thought about moving before the addition and it’s still shocking to me how much functional impact a well designed 500sq feet of space made.
Open floor plans look nice and airy but can be annoying. Kitchen smells go everywhere. My office is in our upstairs loft and it’s incredibly loud if other people are in the house. I occasionally wish I had more doors to close. Also as someone with kids I hate homes with random steps everywhere – just an accident waiting to happen, and it’s also true for elderly people or people with mobility issues.
+1 to open floor plans look nice but I don’t functionally like them. I much prefer having a way to close off the kitchen from the rest of the house if I want. I’m ok with living and dining being open to each other, but I prefer them to be more distinct.
I agree with this! When we bought our house I loved the wide open first floor, but twenty years later I hate it. I like having the kitchen, nook and family room open to each other. But the open living room and dining room are a waste of space. I’d rather have a walled office than the living room and I think I’d be happy with no dining room at this point too, if it meant a bigger kitchen and single eating area. The loft upstairs was great as a play area for kids when they were younger (but not when they were really young) because I could listen to them without being right there, but is now an office area that I wish had walls. Its usefulness as an open space was limited to just a few years when the kids were old enough to play mostly unsupervised but young enough to still have toys and need a play area.
I also wish we had a full bath on the main floor, as we’ve had parents visit who struggle with stairs and it would have been much easier for us to host them.
I also agree with the importance of a mudroom or entryway. Our “mudroom” originally was our laundry area as well, which meant there was very little space to be used for coats, purses, backpacks, etc. We eventually moved the laundry and now we have a place for all of that stuff to land.
The fact that I don’t have a good wall for the TV, which makes living room furniture placement more difficult, and a very “cool” angled window that results in the same problem.
Oh we’re going to encounter this problem in our new flat and have been looking at these TV tripods? We saw them in a European flat and they look nice, and can be tilted to where you’re watching it from.
You’ve probably figured this out already but the word to look for is “vesa” – on both the TV and the mount (It refers to a standardized placement of the the mounting holes, so if you buy a vesa-compatible TV and mount from different companies, you know they’ll still work together)
+1. Make sure your couch can face the tv without blocking a walkway. I have trouble tuning out background noise so I need a wall between the kitchen and tv room. Cooking is surprisingly loud.
I agree with the other comments about a proper entryway and mudroom. Right now we don’t have either so our shoes, coats, etc. are impossible to corral. Avoid tiny laundry spaces. When you need to replace your washer or dryer you’ll have trouble finding one small enough to fit.
We have an antique home so one of the things I love is that all of our rooms are generally separate. We had open floor plan apartment/ranch previously and I hated having the entire first level visible basically from the front door.
I really, really wish we had a finished basement but it’s just not possible given our foundation.
Otherwise I’d take your region/weather into account. I live in MA and we get a lot of snow/ice and have gear for sports in all four seasons . Our garage isn’t attached, so adding a decent sized mudroom/half bath with lots of storage made our house 100% more functional for a young family.
I’m in a ranch that someone converted to an open floor plan and I hate everything about it. Noise transfers like crazy and yet heat doesn’t circulate well (because the living space is huge and the bedrooms are tiny, so either the bedrooms are good and the living space is cold or the living space is warm and the bedrooms are scorching).
If we didn’t have a good mortgage rate, we’d sell tomorrow. Honestly, we still might sell tomorrow.
I like that our 1968 house is not open-concept. I love having separate rooms. There are some openings for flow, but plenty of walls.
I don’t like the line of sight down our hall way – you stair straight into our second bathroom.
While I love having a lot of closets, I’d change some placements. Right now our hallway has 2 directly across from each other. Once is a linen closet and one is a more traditional one. I’d sacrifice a hall closet to have a second closet in the primary.
Bigger bathrooms. See: 1968. But we came from a 1-bath rental built in 1951, so having 2 full baths felt like a luxury!
Wow I just re-read this comment and saw all my typos and misspellings. Is it really only Wednesday?!
If you have kids do not get open floor plan. Ask yourself: where will we have a dinner party that goes past their bedtime? Where will the kids have a slumber party that doesn’t exile you to your bedroom? If you’re expecting noise like someone practicing tuba then consider that also.
If one/both of you is going to work from home, ensure the home office has enough doors. Some open floor plans are such that the office only has cased openings, and that becomes a real issue for work calls!
We have a 1960s Cape Code with its original closed floorplan. When we moved in, we assumed we’d knock down the wall between the kitchen and living room to open it up, but it was going to be $$$ and we didn’t have the money initially. After living in the space for five years, I am so, so glad that wall is there! We would have lost so much functionality. On an emotional level, after a long day at work and cooking dinner, sometimes I want to flop on the couch and ignore the dishes–with the wall, I don’t have a direct line of sight from the couch to the sink. There’s a place for out of sight, out of mind, and IMO it’s 8:45pm on a Thursday when I just can’t face one more thing.
Overall, our house is small but extremely functional. My only two complaints are the small 1960s closets–they’re narrow and so much of the space is vertical, which is better for my 6′ husband than me at 5’4–and our tiny master bathroom, which is so small that only one of us at a time can really be in there.
Oh and we don’t have a dining room. Clearly that’s not high up on my list of problems. We don’t do formal entertaining so we can seat four at our kitchen table to have my parents over. If we’re having more people over than that we do finger food where people can use the living room and basement, or use a bigger table out on the back porch if we want to do sit-down.
No pass through bathrooms, the kind that’s shared between two bedrooms so you can get from one bedroom to the other by going through the bathroom. Too many doorways in an already cramped space. My least favorite thing about our rental.
In our small house, I dislike that our living room is neither open concept nor closed off and requires you to walk through it to get from the kitchen or bathroom to the bedrooms. It has three doorways (one of which is an actual door), and no good way to arrange furniture so people going through don’t walk through the middle of a conversation or between the sofa and the TV. It’s an efficient use of square footage, but I do wish this main room wasn’t also functioning as a wide hallway.
Think through things that you actually want to do in your house and see if the floor plan can accommodate them. As an example, one house we looked at had a series of small rooms and no outdoor area. I could not figure out where I would or could host a kid’s birthday party.
Love that our dining room is separate– we can host couples for dinner without seeing a bunch of dishes in the sink or kid stuff everywhere.
Would prefer if our kitchen nook didn’t have a view of the TV. It makes limiting screen time difficult.
Would prefer doors to our bonus room for future kid parties.
We have large closets in each bedroom but do not have a separate linen closet or coat closet, which I miss a lot.
We have a long one-story house. The water heater is on the opposite end of the house from the primary bathroom and it takes FOREVER for hot water to reach that bathroom. Another thing I’d watch out for is placement of air conditioner filters. Our ceilings are high and the filters are in the ceilings. We have to hire a person climb up on a tall ladder to change the filters.
Yes!!! Our filters too! Makes me crazy. So dangerous.
Interesting question! We just moved from an open floor plan to one that has a defined kitchen, living room, dining room, and family room, and I was surprised by how much I love it. The kids can be watching TV or playing with their friends and they are nearby but not in my face, and their mess isn’t either. I also actually like having laundry in the basement because I like to hang dry my nicer clothes and there is plenty of room for my drying rack and I don’t have to see it. Downside is we have a fenced backyard but it is off a deck, so we have to let our senior dog outside and he doesn’t have an easy lounging space- if you have pets think about food bowl, litter box, and outside space access.
This isn’t so much a layout issue as an orientation issue, but the thing that bugs me the most about my house is that the best light is in bedrooms, and the public rooms are darker than I’d like. We actually ended up spending a bunch of money to put clerestory windows in the family room to try to get more light in there. So… pay attention to the natural light in any house you look at, and what time of day you have sunlight in which rooms.
Likes – tiny kitchen which I initially hated and wanted to remodel immediately is perfect to cook food as the triangle makes sense. In not real people dislikes. My house is filled with windows (including most of the bathrooms). This is great except for when I have a migraine and am curled up in my closet as it is the only decently sized room that is completely dark.
If I could do it again I’d have a full bath downstairs rather than a 1/2 bath.
I love that our apartment is laid out so the public space – living room, kitchen, dining area – are in front while the bedrooms and bathroom are down a hallway. It’s a pre-war building, so rooms have walls and doors. And the ceilings are roughly 11 feet, which makes a huge difference in how spacious everything feels.
I would not want an open plan space, because I like to cook and I want my kitchen to feel like a workspace. If it blends into living space, I find that living encroaches upon that.
Things I love about my house: it’s upside down, so the living spaces are on the top floor, with the 16′ vaulted ceilings + best views. Top floor has a divider+ pocket door between kitchen and dining room (so we don’t have to stare at my dirty kitchen during dinner parties)+ a powder room for guests.
Things I dislike: it’s upside down, so you hear the living spaces in the bedrooms and downstairs can be cold relative to upstairs. Garage is over one bedroom.
Did anyone else see the Brave Pudding shoe socks on the Today show? Honestly, I would never buy these, especially at their $180+ price point. Good for the founder for following her passion project… I guess I am just surprised that there’s enough people who would buy something like this.
I am now at an age where I guess I have my first corn, yay. It’s between my toes so took me a while to notice and figure out what it was but it hurts to wear certain shoes as a result. What does one do? I tried to google but quickly became overwhelmed by the possible solutions. People who have been through this before, help!
I’d go to a podiatrist
Yes! Asap.
I used those pads that dissolve them, and worked like a charm. They’re available on Amazon (yuck) and at the pharmacy.
Yes, these work well and you can get themat any drugstore or supermarket. I would not go to a podiatrist for this unless the OTC pads don’t work.
Yes go to a podiatrist. Incidentally, I don’t think it’s necessarily an age-related thing. I had corns in my early 20s. I’ve never had bunions or any other foot problems though.
I just got some leather pants on RTR. I’ve never worn leather pants in my life. I just lost almost 90 lbs, I’m now a size 6/8 and I’m going to Vegas next week to see the BSB at the Sphere (I’ve posted about this before.. thanks for all outfit recs). Ladies. I FEEL SO GOOD IN THEM.
Eff yea. I’ve never felt so good in my life, and I’m 40 years old. Had to share here because I can’t gloat about this in real life. That is all.
Have a great time!
(also, leather pants you feel great in seem like a perfect Vegas outfit!)
That’s great! So glad they’re bringing you joy :)
Heck yeah, love this! Rock those leather pants lady!!
Congrats and have fun!
Those of you who have lost weight after 40, what are your secrets? GLP is not an option.
It seems like everything I used to eat and do no longer works.
Lots of protein and stop eating and drinking calories after 5. Good luck!
How does one eat dinner if I work until 5, then go to the gym…?
Don’t? Eat your last meal at work before you go. You just have to schedule it. Dinner is not a non-negotiable.
Honestly skipping dinner and just going for a long hard treadmill run will get you skinny quickly. By the time you’re home your too tired to eat anyway.
It’s a non-negotiable for me, ha! I can’t eat full meals at work, so definitely wouldn’t work at all. Also can’t work out while super hungry!
Fortunately for all reading, this is crazy advice and it is possible to lose weight without totally skipping meals!
Actually eating a large dinner type meal at lunch is not a bad idea.
look at Stacy Sims for her work on exercise after menopause – lift heavy + minimal HIIT. Mary Clare Haver also started with a diet plan, not sure if that’s still something she’s pushing. It was relatively high protein but also a lot of omegas.
Multivitamin so I’m not eating extra calories just to get micronutrients, Garmin so I’m honest with myself about my activity levels and steps, and berberine before meals to try to stimulate my own GLP production (placebo effect welcome, but this seems to be the difference between losing and maintaining for me right now). That’s on top of the old standbys like being carb conscious and making sure I get enough sleep and not being on the pill.
Please say more about the berberine. Brand, dosage, frequency, any side effects?
What I’ve been taking is SFI Health 500mg (had to go check) before my two biggest meals of the day. My doctor said I should not take it without eating (that may be because I’m already prone to hypoglycemia). I’ve heard that long term use can cause GI issues, but I’ve not personally had issues, maybe since I’m taking breaks? I lost 25 lb in two rounds.
I am now on a break because I was advised to stop weight loss efforts to get the most benefit from a bone building medication (I guess it is hard to lose weight and build bones at the exact same time?).
I have wondered if there are other bitters that would work just as well with fewer concerns about side effects, but then I’m not sure if they’ve just been studied less. But I enjoy bitters in seltzer anyway, so I’ve been thinking of giving them a shot when I try to lose weight again.
Thank you for your detailed response.
Related to blood glucose, has anyone tried CGM or something like Signos to help with weight loss? I would be worried about trying berberine without monitoring my blood glucose to avoid hypoglycemia.
There’s no evidence a CGM assists with this.
I mean, there’s some. Reactive hypoglycemia can lead to weight gain insofar as the only treatment for hypoglycemia is calories, and CGM + detailed a food journal can help come up with a diet to prevent reactive hypoglycemia. This can be life changing. But I think it’s not a common issue.
Hypoglycemia is normally symptomatic (asymptomatic hypoglycemia is usually a late stage complication of a lot of hypoglycemia over time).
Hyperglycemia is the one that CGMs are more helpful for catching (again unless unaware hypoglycemia is an issue, which is usually in the context of a disease state).
I have and my husband did it with me. It was great for him and he’s lost 25+ pounds just by eating to avoid major glucose spikes (and adjusting his diet when it did.)
It was not a silver bullet for me and I’m back to tracking, pushing protein, etc.
My husband also changed his diet to avoid big glucose spikes and lost weight as a result of the dietary changes. I think he really had to see it to believe that some savory foods were spiking his blood glucose higher and longer than sweet desserts, which he found counterintuitive. His spikes were also quite high, so that was motivating. I wish I could lose weight as easily as he does though!
Going off Mirena.
I walk everywhere. Everywhere.
It is very hard to be fat if you’re walking 8-12 miles a day.
This right here. My car is only for out of town trips. Walk and bike for everything else. It also helps prevent impulse buys. Studded tires and bar mitts on the bike make it solid all weather transport.
I wish I lived in a place where walking everywhere was an option. Alas, a 60 mile round trip to work, 10 mile round trip to the nearest grocery store, and high speed rural roads with no sidewalks don’t really lend themselves to a walkable lifestyle.
Move.
Totally a reasonable response. Thank you for your meaningful contribution.
It actually isn’t a terrible suggestion. Why are you living in a rural isolated location?
Wow, I knew there were seriously out of touch people on this board but this is a new one. Yes, of course I will put my paid-off house up for sale tomorrow, empty my retirement account to put a down payment on a lower quality place in the city (but not too close, because I need to get those steps in yo) so I can walk 8-12 miles to work and back in subzero temps through many feet of snow on the daily. Why didn’t I think of this.
Jeez. Some people on this board really need to touch grass.
I managed to be fat while marathon training, so where there’s a will, there’s a way.
Were you doing a plan that averaged 56-70 MPW volume? Because I’ve marathon trained while fat on a program that maxed at 40 MPW, but every time I am regularly maintaining 40 MPW (not just peaking at it), I am struggling to keep pounds on. And I’m so slow I’m basically walking.
I gained weight training for a half-marathon. Turns out burning that many calories and energy makes you really freaking hungry.
Running is more likely to cause hunger than walking.
This has been my experience too – I love running but it makes me so hungry! For me, fitness benefits are totally worth it without any weight loss though
When I’ve had the (rare) occasion to be regularly walking 10+ miles/day, I eat whenever I’m hungry, even junk food, don’t need to optimize for macros, feel fantastican, and lose weight. But practically speaking, most of my life I’m not going to have time for 10 mile daily walks
This is one of the struggles of carrying more weight. Your body wants to maintain that size and will fight you. Those adipose cells (fat) want to stay full and will secret molecules that make you hungry to prevent their size from shrinking. It is terrible to feel freaking hungry. To not eat when you feel like that is a form of torture actually. Ideally you try to optimize the type of calories you eat, but we all know how hard that is as well.
I walk 8-10 miles a day and am overweight. It’s definitely not impossible especially as a (peri)menopausal woman. I was always slim until hormonal stuff hit me hard around 40.
EXACTLY
Weight watchers, seriously
Agree. I’m old enough to have tried almost everything.
Focus on a low fat diet (<50g/day). I realize that eating fat doesn't make you fat, but for me, when I focus on the fat content of food, it naturally leads to more healthy, lower calorie foods. I had pancreatitis so was forced to eat low fat, no alcohol for 9 weeks while we went through all the testing, and I lost 20+ pounds. Once we determined the cause (viral), I maintained a lot of the same eating habits I'd picked up over those 9 weeks and have kept the weight off.
This is old-fashioned advice, but it does work for some. I’m personally a low carb/ full-fat person, but it’s very body dependent.
Metformin was it for me. I know it doesn’t work for weight loss for everyone, but it was/ is very effective for me.
I use the calorie counting app LoseIt. Very eye-opening and helpful, and it gets easier overtime as you save recipes/foods. At the end of the day, look over your food/drink choices and see what helped or hurt. If certain meals/snacks help you stay full longer and are lower calorie, then you can do more of those, etc.
Divorce really helped. It wasn’t fun at all, but the weight just fell off for the first time in years. Sadly it’s crept back as the dust has settled, but I’d rather be fat and calm than slender and stressed out! (Slender and calm would be perfect though)
Not sure whether there’s a way to channel that kind of stress that puts me off food, but it would be very helpful. I don’t qualify for a glp1.
Looking to get my husband a nice plaid “shacket” for Valentine’s Day. Has anyone purchased a nice one recently? I saw a decent looking one from Vuori. Thanks!
My husband received a Jetty shacket like this for the holidays and we both like it. https://jettylife.com/products/hull-jacket-agave?pr_prod_strat=jac&pr_rec_id=57b76b31b&pr_rec_pid=7205581127751&pr_ref_pid=7205581160519&pr_seq=uniform
Check Faherty and Outerknown
+1 Faherty. All Marine Layer. They’re both of our most recent obsession.
Hoping you buy Faherty because they just put out an announcement about how supporting people who vote, march and support their neighbors. Of course, the Magots instantly jumped on with comments about how they would never buy a Faherty product again.
I don’t think they were buying much Faherty to begin with
Duluth Trading Company
Any tips on making men’s crewneck T-shirts more flattering (big bust, short neck, rectangle body)? I just found some old ones that are sentimental because they were from school/work things but I’m wary of cutting them up… would love it if you have tips or tutorials. TIA!
Wear under a blazer or jacket with a defined waist
Roll up the sleeves. Use a hair tie to gather excess fabric either at the center front or center back, then tuck the “pigtail” up underneath. Try wearing an elastic belt under the tee above your waist and tucking the tee into the belt to make it appear cropped.
I have taken in the sides of shirts like this in a curve shape to make them cuter
Are we talking “I just want to wear these around the house but look a little cuter?” Or do you need them to look like a cool-girl graphic tee? I don’t have the sewing skills for the latter, but for the former, I cut the band off at the crew neck, and it helps a LOT. Sometimes I cut a slit down the front to open the neckline (ends up looking kind of like a henley). Trimming the sleeves also helps — just cut an inch or two off the length. And consider cutting vents in the sides so it’s not as much of a tube.
Fake a v-neck with a scarf or an open-front topper. I like the warmth of crew neck sweaters in winter but feel like I’m just a walking chest with all that fabric right up to my neck and this is how I make the neckline work for me.
I loathe the way crew necks look on me. My sentimental crew necks are in a pile, waiting for me to get around to having someone make them into a quilt.
I routinely cut the neck band out of men’s graphic T shirts. I am not wearing these to work obviously, but I wear them casually and to casual nights out.
Is it just me, or are a few of these comments copy-paste from the post last year about somebody starting a second job at a record store?
OP – sorry to be unclear — I just want to wear them to the gym and not hate myself every time I see my reflection. Can I cut them into V-necks or something? I’ve tried in the past and F’ed up everything.
Try adjusting the sleeves as your first hack. Roll them a couple of times and see if it makes a difference when you look in the mirror. With a big bust it makes a big difference to move the visual line from the sleeves away from your widest point.
Lower the neckline. Depending on where you want to wear it, you may want to add in a new neck band, which would have to be larger than the one we you removed. A tailor or seamstress could do it.
Just a TV recc for Riot Women on Britbox. Women aged mid-40s to 60s start a rock band in a Yorkshire village and deal with all the various life shit that comes with that age and stage. Music is great, acting is fantastic. I love it and my husband does too.
what is a current style for an evening bag?
A small shoulder bag like these:
https://cuyana.com/products/mini-celestia-bag
https://www.coach.com/products/tabby-shoulder-bag-26/CH857.html
I would really love to find an alternative to this top from Stio: https://www.stio.com/products/womens-turpin-fleece-funnel-neck?variant=46574877114542
The eggplant color is perfect for me, and the fabric is thin but warm and super soft. I have had two of them so far and both had weird puckering on the shoulder seams that made them sort of pouf up in a way that looks unwearably odd. I am going to try for a replacement from Stio and hope that they can get me one without that issue, but if not – does anyone know of something similar from another retailer? (hopefully one with better quality control!) TIA!
https://oglmove.com/products/eco-mousse%c2%ae-thermal-ruched-sides-tuckable-mockneck-top#1
I like this.
I have dupes for that style from both Land’s End and Talbot that cost $20-30, but I don’t think they are going to be better quality than Stio. I think Stio is the upper end of the quality spectrum for fleece, in all honesty.
Dudley Stephens?
Talbots often has funnel neck microfleece styles but it looks like they are pretty picked over at this point.
My partner just cancelled our Washington Post subscription over their aggressive disinterest in being excellent or even adequate. I signed up for Axios DC. Anything else relatively local to the DMV we should subscribe to?
I’ve been hearing a lot about The Banner (I think that’s it, sorry I don’t have more info).
Honestly, we’re going to need some laws about billionaires buying news outlets.
The Banner is Baltimore-based but has expanded to include a Montgomery County, MD section, so there is some DMV coverage. It has been a breath of fresh air in a world dominated with media owned by the few, the wealthy, the conservative.
Depending on where you are based: https://mocoshow.com/ is excellent for community-based reporting
Washingtonian had a morning newsletter that I enjoy. It has a little snark in the news summaries.
the51st.news. They do good coverage of local upcoming events. It’s a start up, but their first hire was my favorite local reporter for DC city government.
I hear good things about the Baltimore Banner as well.
I’m applying for an award through my professional society and need to ask my (male) manager for a letter or recommendation. Why do I feel nervous to ask him? I wasn’t nervous asking 2 (female) mentors. He just gave me a very good performance review and bonus yesterday, so there should be no issue. Right??
No issue!
If it helps: you winning the award makes him look good too
Right! Reference those things in your ask: Following up on the great review and bonus from yesterday, I wanted to ask if you would write a letter of reccomendation for XYZ Award. I’ve also asked A and B, and your reccomendation would go a long way. Let me know what I can provide to make this happen.”
Right–email him a draft to review and offer to print it for his signature if he’s good to sign off. If he has an EA, work through them after sending the initial email.
Personally, I’d be prepared to do this at his suggestion, but I wouldn’t start there. He may want to write his own letter or just be put off by your suggesting he sign off on your words of praise for yourself (which I am sure are completely deserved). People approach these things very differently IME.
Agree–be prepared but don’t start here. Ask what he needs.
That’s fair. I just see a lot of requests with multiple steps being put aside.
Right!! “Thanks again for the wonderful feedback yesterday. I would love to be able to use it to support my application for Award X. Would you be willing to submit a recommendation for me? I would be happy to create a first draft if you’d like.”
This is perfect.
No issue! And I bet he’s delighted to do it for you.
I’m a partner at a big law firm, in my mid 40s. I’ve decided that I want to level up my fashion and look. I’m reasonably good at dressing myself right now, but I think I need professional help to get to the next level for executive presence. Anyone have a recommendation for a consultant who does this type of work? I’m in the Bay Area and ideally looking for someone in person.
Estelle Winstett (sp?) would be great, but she’s based in Nashville. I think she does work like this nationally and virtually though.
I usually wear a black t-shirt or workout tank and a skirt, and then switch into leggings in the bathroom before the dance call. Most of theaters in my area do a block of vocal auditions and then a block of dance auditions, so there’s time to change, but you don’t need to go full-on leotard, tights, etc.
If there’s no time to change, everyone just wears workout clothes or dancewear.
I would bring tennis shoes, jazz shoes, and character shoes. The choreographer will usually tell you which shoes to wear when you walk into the room.