Coffee Break: Featherweight Cashmere Silk Fringed Edge Scarf

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woman wears cashmere fringed scarf pashmina on top of a blue blouse and white pants

This scarf looks great if you want a real cashmere pashmina, whether for work or play.

I've always found these great for a few purposes — particularly, to keep at the office to use as either an additional layer or a lap blanket, either for warmth or so you can sit cross-legged in a skirt. I particularly like these as an additional layer on TOP of a blazer or sweater jacket if you're still freezing.

(I also just like them as regular winter scarves and as an additional layer for summer dresses when a cardigan would lay weird. In fact, I just used my winter scarf to wrap around my shoulders when I was chilly at the restaurant on date night.)

The Quince one (60% cashmere, 40% silk) comes in seven colors for $59.90.

Looking for something more affordable? This one from Amazon has a lot of great reviews — we're also fans of the ones from J.Crew and Nordstrom.

Sales of note for 2/14/25 (Happy Valentine's Day!):

  • Nordstrom – Winter Sale, up to 60% off! 7850 new markdowns for women
  • Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase — and extra 60% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + 15% off (readers love their suiting as well as their silky shirts like this one)
  • Boden – 15% off new season styles
  • Eloquii – 300+ styles $25 and up
  • J.Crew – 40% of your purchase – prices as marked
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site and storewide + extra 50% off clearance
  • Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Flash sale ending soon – markdowns starting from $15, extra 70% off all other markdowns (final sale)

109 Comments

  1. Update from the state level in the us: when they say ‘federal funding is frozen’, it means real people will hurt. It is awful and confusing and demoralizing.

    I’ve dedicated my life to serving my community. It is heartbreaking to see people’s lives being put in jeopardy with the same energy as a note to clean out the office fridge.

    This is the bad place.

    1. No, much of our population voted for a bad person who only cares about those who bend their knee to him. Listen to today’s NPR “On Point” about how Trump could have gone through the list of January 6th protesters and pardoned only those who were convicted of non-violent crimes, but he did not want to spend the time doing so and was committed to a “Day 1” pardon, so he pardoned or commuted all sentences. Good to know that he’d rather be beholden to a bunch of criminals than to support the Capitol Police officers who were injured/harmed, the judicial system who worked to carefully assess and prosecute all cases, and even to the legislators who were scared or harmed during the invasion of the Capitol. Good job, R’s!

    2. at least the still existing DOE confirmed that it does not apply to federal direct loans, pell grants or work study.

      i’m an attorney by training, but it’s been a while – issuing such a broad executive order- how is each agency supposed to know what is/isn’t impacted

    3. We knew this. His supporters genuinely do not care. And will be surprised if/when this starts to impact their own life.

      1. His supporters will just blame democrats/liberals if anything negatively impacts them.

          1. Someone here yesterday blamed the early COVID response on democrats. Uhhhh, Trump was president then.

            This is “why was President Obama hiding on 9/11?” level thinking.

    4. I fully expect the pause will be paused by the Impoundment Act, but it’s going to be a rough week or so until the emergency hearing. There’s so much to worry about.

      1. it’s also just going to be exhausting to pause and unpause and re-pause and whatever as it makes its way through the courts. and it still is not 100% clear what exactly is/isnt paused

        1. The uncertainty is destructive, and gratuitous, and pointless. Certainly not a move in support of efficiency, regardless of how it is spun.

    5. Who doesn’t love seeing food literally being taken out of the mouths of children? I wonder how many folks realize just how poor families have to be to qualify for WIC? All the pomp and circumstance about being pro-life–are you now going to literally feed those lives and the lives of all ages? And without farm aid and as much as 80% of the agricultural workforce at risk, are we prepared to watch people literally go hungry in mass numbers or steal for…food? Some of those hungry will be you, white Christians. And wait for the ravages of uncontained bird flu on our food supply. Hope it was worth it.

      Folks wringing their hands about Pell grants or still mumbling about women sports need to wake up. It’s way, way worse than I think folks realize.

        1. Highly aware. You are missing the point. Student loans are literally a luxury when many babies will be going without formula and food pantries are overrun thanks to this madness.

          1. Not sure why people here are now constantly saying that someone is “missing their point.”

            The whole thing is that people disagree on your point.

      1. They’ve already clarified WIC won’t be affected so you’re just spouting misinformation.

        1. WIC and SNAP might not but free and reduced lunches aren’t direct to recipients. Meals on Wheels wasn’t sure they could serve food to seniors this morning. There are a LOT of programs that indirectly food and shelter many people in this country outside of those benefits. People say oh nonprofits should do it. Many, many nonprofits get their operating funds through federal dollars.

          Even if you believe strongly that none of these programs should be funded, there is certainly an appropriate way to do that and this isn’t it. But we just LOVE chaos now.

      2. WIC, and other payments directly made to individuals, are not being affected. The combo of misinformation and histrionics is a bad look.

          1. I guess we’re just not all fully proficient on the exact meaning of “ending wokeness” in official memos.

            Why was Medicaid down anyway?

        1. It’s the uncertaintly that is destructive. These EOs are deliberately vague, and therefore a challenge to implement, even if they were constitutional. Please don’t blame the public/victims for misunderstanding an order that is as clear as mud.

        2. To be clear: this wasn’t immediately clear until OMB issued a memo this afternoon. Oh, and don’t forget that a lot of agencies are under a no contact order… so it’s not like we could call and ask.

          Agree that the uncertainty today has been rotten.

    6. The one that really gets me is pausing (and potentially permanently cutting) funding to PEPFAR, which funds AIDS medication around the world. This has saved millions of lives since it was started by GW Bush and even just pausing medication means more people could get AIDS (including newborn babies) and the virus is more likely to evolve resistance to the drugs, which would affect people everywhere.

      1. Yes, this interruption is needlessly cruel and a danger to our national security, among other things.

      2. Yes. USAID isn’t perfect but we more than get our money’s worth from it in national security, and believe me, China is more than willing to step in to fill the void

    7. It’s deeply confusing and chaotic. One area that I am especially grieving is the impact on HIV and AIDS medication distribution through PEPFAR, which has been “paused” or suspended. Even a short pause could result in significant health impacts and the erosion of American prestige internationally. PEPFAR has saved 25 million lives and prevented HIV from becoming a new drug resistant pandemic.

      I am also concerned about Medicaid, SNAP benefits, and other federal programs that are distributed to the states to be distributed to individuals.

  2. I’m getting a cortisone shot in my foot tomorrow. Between toes 3 and 4 at the ball of the foot. Advice? How much will my foot balloon up? Fashion question: what footwear to wear? Sneakers? Crocs? I have to go into the office. Office is casual. And how long will the worst of the pain / puffing be?

    1. Usually after a steroid injection you are supposed to NOT be using the limb, at least for several hours after injection, but often for a a day or two. It’s a day to use crutches or work from home.

      You better call the clinic today and ask your questions. Because why bother to waste money and time on a treatment if you are not able to follow-up appropriately?

      1. I was never advised to use crutches and I’ve had this shot a number of times.

        Sure, don’t run a marathon the day of your injection, but it’s not that life-altering.

        OP wear comfortable shoes (slippers not necessary) and elevate or ice if it seems to be swelling.

        Hope it makes your Morton’s Neuroma (I assume) stop hurting!!

    2. I’ve only had cortisone shots in my knee, not my foot, but there was no swelling at all the 3 times I’ve had it done. I’d make sure to wear shoes that can accommodate a gauze bandage over the injection site and socks to help hold the bandage in place.

      My cortisone shot included a numbing agent + the doctor sprayed a freezing spray on my skin while he administered the shot. It felt a little achey afterward for a day or two each time but nothing I’d call terrible pain.

      I swim for exercise and my doctor advised me avoid the pool for 48 hours to avoid a very unlikely risk of infection.

      1. Same except as I am not a swimmer there were zero restrictions put on activity. And I get my shots from a sports med orthopedic practice that services an NFL team.

    3. Don’t wear new black socks and do a long sweaty walk beforehand–signed, still embarrassed about black feet 20 years later.

      Wear tennis shoes. Keep an ice pack in the car just in case. My experience was that the shots were well worth it for my plantar fasciitis. But not gonna lie that it was really painful. Could hardly walk out to my car afterward, even though my podiatrist made it sound like no big deal. Maybe it’s better for other folks?

    4. I have had plenty of cortisone shots in my feet. In my experience, they did not swell at all and it wasn’t that painful. They are going to numb you beforehand.

    5. I’ve had this shot in that exact location for a morton’s neuroma, and didn’t have much pain or swelling at all. Was told to take it easy for 24 hours.

    6. I had a similar shot maybe a decade ago, and my symptoms disappeared completely. I hope it’s the same for you! That’s the good news. The bad news is that it was, without exception, the worst pain of my life, including childbirth and broken bones. It lasted for less than 2 minutes, but I was unprepared for the pain. I hope it’s less than that for you… it was definitely worth the misery for me!

  3. I am mentally aware of what it means to have a terminal diagnosis. But that’s big picture. I’m was not prepared for the grinding down that comes with pancreatic cancer. How the GI side effects make them not want visitors and can trap them at home. And how much weight a person can lose. And how there is not much you can do at all to help or be of comfort.

    I don’t have a question. Just an observation about how unprepared I am. And how helpless I feel.

    1. I’m so sorry you – and a close family member? – are dealing with this. Sending hugs and strength.

    2. Yes, I hear you. My Mom had pancreatic cancer, and I am high risk.

      I strongly encourage you to include Palliative Care as part of her treatment team. They can give guidance even during active treatment. They were very helpful in answers my Mom’s hard questions, and giving advice on daily quality of life issues. And they helped us deal with those GI symptoms, so things were tolerable. Often oncologists neglect these day to day issues, but sometimes the infusion nurse will help. We found the occasional consult to a gastroenterologist, nutritionist, cancer psychiatrist all very helpful. Just don’t wait too long to get Palliative Care involved.

      Focus on the small things, that give comfort and even happiness. Everyone she wants to see or talk to, should come to visit or call. Plans should be made for visits or achievable goals (ex. going to a child’s wedding/graduation etc…). Having things to look forward to are important. And ask her to go through old photos, re-tell stories, record her voice telling them. And when you can, ask her for advice. Let her still be your Mom.

      I’m so so sorry. I encourage you to find someone outside of your immediate family circle to vent to. We all of friends/neighbors/co-workers who have been through something like this.

    3. I’m so sorry. Watching your loved one be consumed by cancer is awful. The oncology team will have referrals to therapy services for you. This is one part of the journey.

      My brother in law passed away and my sister in law has told me many times she regrets not getting help when he was first given the news he was at the end.

    4. I’m sorry. I get it.

      Meet them where they are at, stay present. Try not to get hung up on how you expect them to be or how things could have been. Focus on the day to day things, the small things, the symptoms that can be managed. Get palliative care on board. Appreciate the good days.

    5. I’m so sorry that you are dealing with this. My FIL died from pancreatic cancer, and we were totally unprepared for the mental toll it took on him (and us). I can’t recall the specifics, but besides the terminal diagnosis, I think there is some link between pancreatic cancer and depression. My FIL’s personality completely changed after he was diagnosed and started treatment. He was miserable, did not want to see anyone, annoyed by the presence of his grandchildren, didn’t want to have visitors or any closure with family members or friends. No reminiscing or pleasant visits. It was awful. His doctors prescribed anti depressants but he refused to take them because he was already taking so many other medications. It was like he had a complete 180 in his personality and turned into a different person. I say this just to encourage you to keep an eye out for signs of depression and ask the doctors about depression medications that may at least help with the mental toll. It is one of our big regrets that we didn’t push harder for him to just take the antidepressants and perhaps get some relief from the mental toll. Wishing you peace and strength in this journey.

  4. Hair Q. I have very fine hair. Pretty thin although getting thicker w/ minoxidil. It is gently wavy when I air-dry (chin-shoulder length). I would love to get the waves more defined. But whenever I put a curl product in it, scrunch, air-dry, it looks awful, like wires/strings with no particular pattern. Does anyone have similar hair and figured out how to make this work? TIA!

    1. Try doing a clarifying wash and then doing the same again. I’d lean more towards mousses than gels.

    2. Have you tried diffusing? I have fine, wavy hair that looks really stringy when I let it air dry, so I try to diffuse as much as possible. You will also need products that are designed for fine hair since a lot of the popular products really weigh my hair down – I’ve liked Innersense curl cream, Fenti’s curl cream, Cake curl mousse and something I found on this site called Ecoslay Orange Marmalade.

    3. Brush only when sopping wet, then add product (curl cream, mousse, gel, whatever). Add product with praying hands throughout—you want the curls to clump from brushing wet, then not unclump. Then air dry or diffuse (I wrap my head in a T-shirt for a little bit of time to absorb water—allegedly cotton bath towels make curls frizz). Use praying hands again to remove the crunch.

    4. I use a curl shampoo with no sulphates or silicones.

      Towel dry hair, anti tangle brush while wet, both upside down. Scrunch and lift ends with hands.

      I blow dry a little, scrunch.
      Then blow dry to almost dry, brushed. Then I add an air dry cream or curl defining cream to my ends and scrunch.

      1. It may sound like lot, but the whole thing takes less than 10 minutes, of which five is a towel on my head while I do other things.

  5. What do you get your husband for his birthday? Looking for ideas. He isn’t into anything and buys what he wants for himself…

      1. Your husband could be me. I like when my DH plans an evening or weekend for us to spend together without asking me what I want to do. A coffee shop, an evening event, a dinner, something with friends I enjoy, etc. Not an overscheduled weekend, but one with several things I enjoy doing and we can do together.

    1. We don’t. Sometimes if there’s a nice sweater at LL Bean I’ll get him that, or if his wallet needs replacing, but generally we don’t do presents.

    2. Honestly nothing anymore for this reason. The kids make him something and we do cake, etc and try to also find a way to celebrate just the two of us

    3. I try to get a gift for him to open but also dinner of his choice, whether restaurant or favorite home-cooked meal.

    4. We don’t. We usually celebrate with a getaway but if not, it’s just a nice dinner out, birthday person’s choice.

    5. A private lesson for his hobby or a gift card for a long massage at a nice spa. Even better if you get a massage too and make it a date.

    6. We don’t exchange gifts. He doesn’t want anything and I only want travel that I want to plan myself.

    7. Something for his hobbies. Since his are arcane, he sends me links. Which is fine because I do the same with him for gifts to me.

      I will throw in a couple of small things so there’s still a surprise.

      And we go out for tiki drinks and Polynesian style appetizers, which is his fave.

    8. Scotch. Lego sets. Dinner at one of his favorite restaurants (as opposed to mine).

    9. Mine is similar and he loved a hand-painted mini-portrait of our cat I got from an etsy maker. He also really liked that I framed his Spartan race medals that had just been laying around in storage. If there’s anything like that–pets or family, hobbies or accomplishments, those gifts are usually really well received.

  6. Kind of random but has anyone purchased flatware recently that does not rust in the dishwasher? I have at this point purchased three different sets – all 18/10 stainless steel – of varying supposedly good brands and all three have started to rust immediately! I’m looking to spend $200 or less for 8 which I thought was a reasonable budget.

    1. I gave one of my kids a set of Cambridge from Kohl’s for Christmas and they haven’t mentioned it rusting. It was a satin finish if that makes a difference. It was marked down and I had coupons and Kohl’s Kash so it was cheap.

    2. I love my flatware, so I googled it to provide you a link and then found out it was discontinued. Good luck in your search.

      1. My flatware from Crate & Barrel (~18 yrs old) is also discontinued. I found a few pieces at Replacements Unlimited, just fyi! It was more expensive than I thought it’d be, but nice to be able to add the spoons I needed.

      2. Mine, too. I bought it years ago from Ross Simons. It was a stainless-steel version of the sterling silver Gorham “Fairfax” pattern, called Gorham Fairview. It was discontinued about 20 years ago. But maybe look for Gorham flatware at Ross Simons if they still carry that sort of thing (and while you’re at that site, check out the estate jewelry they offer, wonderful pieces!).

    3. I just have Ikea flatware and haven’t had any problem with it rusting, and I only put it in the dishwasher.

    4. We got a Waterford set almost 20 years ago and, somewhat annoyingly since I’m now tired of the pattern, it has held up beautifully.

    5. My friend and I both have Oneida “Easton” which is high quality, has never rusted and I think it’s a pretty classic, simple pattern. I’ve had it for at least 20 years and I’ve never replaced a piece other than because we lost pieces or left them somewhere! Highly recommend. I don’t even use my real silver anymore because this is so good.

      1. So the problem with Oneida is they apparently switched their manufacturing (as did a lot of the other old reputable brands) and their stuff now has major known issues with rust, it’s not just me (according to the internet anyways)

        1. Yes, I can’t expand my set because the new ones are in no way comparable to the ones I have from years ago.

          1. I just ordered some replacement pieces for my 25-year-old set and returned them because I thought they were fake.

    6. The flatware I got from Crate and Barrel as a wedding shower present in 2010 looks brand new.

      1. (Decidedly not recent duh but it’s still being offered there; making an unfounded assumption it’s still good)

        1. Same here. We have C&B Scoop and have been using them for 10 years; they still look great. They’re made by Oneida, so maybe have had the same changes/issues someone above mentions, but for whatever this is worth, reviews on the C&B site still look good.

    7. My <10 yr Oneida is still looking great. But I just looked and it is a bit above your price point. What kinds of detergent are you using?

    8. I don’t think $200 for eight place settings is a reasonable budget. Just being real with you. Up your price point and you’ll have better results.

  7. Just saw a video of people being deported being escorted onto a military plane and they are all wearing disposable masks. Why? For an administration that was so anti mask this is strange

    1. Gee, I think it’s just an opportunity to treat foreigners like they’re diseased.

    2. Given how bad flu is right now, it’s probably a reasonable precaution when you have a lot of people in close proximity and don’t want to have to deal with taking care of sick people (it’s expensive, you’d have to wait to deport them, it would be an excuse for the accepting country not to take them). All the staff at hospitals and medical facilities in my city are masking now.

      1. That would be pretty funny. Let’s be practical about preventing the spread of disease but not when it comes to our own populace.

    3. It might be to hide their identity, since effectively they are being perp walked in public.

  8. What’s the best chocolate/consumable that you can get on Amazon? I am doing some care packages and wanted to include a nice treat, preferably <$20.

    1. They sell Tcho, which is a chocolate lover’s chocolate. There’s a 3 bar dark variety for $20.

    2. Given that you can’t verify the authenticity of anything from Amazon, I don’t like to buy anything consumable from there.

    3. OmNon chocolate bars. Come in trios – 3 for $23.99. From Iceland.
      Really lovely.

  9. I’m so sorry that you are dealing with this. My FIL died from pancreatic cancer, and we were totally unprepared for the mental toll it took on him (and us). I can’t recall the specifics, but besides the terminal diagnosis, I think there is some link between pancreatic cancer and depression. My FIL’s personality completely changed after he was diagnosed and started treatment. He was miserable, did not want to see anyone, annoyed by the presence of his grandchildren, didn’t want to have visitors or any closure with family members or friends. No reminiscing or pleasant visits. It was awful. His doctors prescribed anti depressants but he refused to take them because he was already taking so many other medications. It was like he had a complete 180 in his personality and turned into a different person. I say this just to encourage you to keep an eye out for signs of depression and ask the doctors about depression medications that may at least help with the mental toll. It is one of our big regrets that we didn’t push harder for him to just take the antidepressants and perhaps get some relief from the mental toll. Wishing you peace and strength in this journey.

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