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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 230 Comments · by

Wednesday’s TPS Report: Heathered Tweed Jacket

The Personal Shopper (TPS) |

This post may contain affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. Rebecca Taylor Heathered Tweed JacketNordstrom Rack has a TON of Rebecca Taylor pieces, steeply discounted. I like this heathered tweed blazer, marked 73% off (!!!), from $495 down to $135. Funnily enough the darker color is still in stock in sizes 0-12, but the lighter color (which… isn't my taste) is totally sold out. Also nice: this, this, and this. Rebecca Taylor Heathered Tweed Jacket Here are a couple of lower-priced alternatives and a few plus-sized options. Seen a great piece you’d like to recommend? Please e-mail [email protected].

Sales of note for 9.10.24

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Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. Anonymous

    My mom asked for a short christmas list this year. We’ve never exchanged gifts in my family for any reason, so I’m sort of at a loss. Other than a gift card or something that won’t satisfy her. What would you ask for?

    • TCFKAG

      Hat/gloves/scarf set.
      Movies or books you’ve been wanting but putting off getting off buying.
      Jewelry (not too expensive but nice – or a watch.)
      Tickets to something you could go to together?

      Or you can just go truly sentimental and ask for a time to go through family photos with her or something (which I need/want to do with my mom but I need to get a good photo scanner first. But that’s neither here nor there.)

      • La'Femme Boutique

        What does she like to do around the house? Maybe you can get her some household items that she can use often. Or replace something that you think is torn down but she just won’t let go. Kind of like an upgrade!

    • Giftee

      Tell us more about yourself. What do you like? Describe your lifestyle. What types of gifts do you love to get and what do you hate?

      • Anonymous OP

        well this is the issue- I don’t like stuff. I don’t like to have stuff unless the item in question serves a direct purpose/is something that I use on a very regular basis. I’m one of those people who has 33 items of clothing for all purposes year round. I just don’t want anything. Except for my bills paid, I guess.
        I hate stuff that isn’t functional. As for lifestyle, I work all the time and when I’m not working I’m working on finishing my PhD. Unfortunately I don’t have time for hobbies atm, which is a sad existence. My mom and I also don’t do things together as we have no common interests and she’s very judgy about everything I’d be remotely interested in.

        • Anon

          Consumables, then? Wine, booze, chocolate, steaks? Or a gift certificate to a spa or yoga studio or movie theater or whatever. We aren’t “stuff” people in my family, and this is what we do.

        • TCFKAG

          My family is a mix of stuff and non-stuff family – and experiential gifts are a favorite for us. I frequently get my parents tickets to shows (or one year a giftcard to a cooking class.)

        • anon

          Is there anything you’ve got that needs replacing or upgrading? New/nicer sheets, towels, cell phone case, wallet, French press? That way you don’t add more stuff.

          Anything to make grad student life easier? Massage gift certificate? Netflix subscription? Kindle? Framed photo of your mother to decorate your cold, barren library carrel?

        • Cat

          Netflix subscription? Bonus in that it can be a go-to gift for her in years to come.

        • Killer Kitten Heels

          What about really fancy versions of things you already use – a super-nice pair of gloves, or high-end coffee, or high-end wine, or similar?

          My mom’s like you – very utilitarian about her belongings – and these types of gifts are the ones that seem to make her happiest, since they meet her “must be useful” criteria while still being something a little bit special.

        • Bee

          I agree with Killer Kitten Heels – think about things you use on a regular basis that could be upgraded, or things you would use if you had them. Portable phone charger, nice head phones, fun office accessories, nice sheets or towels, fun hand towels? Or what about stress relieving activities that you don’t want to pay for yourself btu might use if they were given to you – museum or garden membership, movie tickets, yoga tapes?

        • Anonymous

          Maybe try this again, with less negativity?

          Books? Something for your office? Nice coffee? A book on tape for your commute?

        • Anonymous

          I would ask for upgrades of things you already have and use then. Newer towels and sheets. What about asking for the foundation or concealer that you use? Also what about nicer kitchen gadgets? I personally really want a nice can opener for Christmas.

          • anon

            You know, I am not into “stuff” either, and I have found that people seem to take offense to this. She asked for practical gift ideas, not lifestyle advice.

          • TCFKAG

            I don’t know, I’m generally a pretty cheerful person (who loves shopping for other people) but being asked to make Christmas lists makes me kind of grinchy. Because I don’t need anything really and telling people what I *want* just makes me feel like they’re going to judge me a little if its not what they think I should want.

            Actually, the “joy” of Christmas for many of us is not at all about the gift giving since that’s a stressful experience full of possible traps. My favorite Christmas things involve no presents but instead involve seeing friends and family I don’t see often.

          • Blonde Lawyer

            To Anon re: offense to disliking “stuff” :

            This will out me to people who know this story but my husband had a pre-wedding party for his close friend. It was a cookout in our backyard for his friend’s out of town family that came for the wedding. The groom’s dad happened to see our garage and our basement while we were setting up and incredulously asked “where is all your stuff?” “Did you just move in?”

            My husband hates “stuff” and if he isn’t using something it gets donated rather than stored. We each have a box or two of college and high school mementos and we have storage containers with various holiday decorations but we don’t have piles of “stuff” we might use someday stored somewhere.

            The groom’s dad was somehow very disturbed by our “lack of stuff” and couldn’t stop talking about it. He thought it was so weird. He had never seen such an empty basement and garage. He actually seemed offended and we just couldn’t figure out why. The groom was really embarrassed at his dad’s behavior.

            We realized it was one of those situations, and I don’t know if there is a word for it, but where people want you to have the same bad habit as them and when you don’t it makes them more self-conscious and feel badly about their own insecurity. Groom’s dad has way too much stuff. It is a bone of contention with Groom’s wife. He was likely defensive about being compared to us or whatever.

            As to the word I’m looking for, here are other examples. Someone is worried they drink too much so when they are out, they try to get everyone to drink too and as much as them. They might get mad at someone that doesn’t drink. Someone self conscious about eating choices tries to get everyone to eat one of the donuts she brought in. Etc. Is there a word for that?

          • Not A Grinch

            +1 to Blonde Lawyer. I too really dislike having “stuff” around if it’s not for any practical purpose, and I really have always hated feeling pressured into the whole Christmas present thing. I told my family I’m not doing it this year, and it feels great. My mom wants to buy me something and I really couldn’t care less. I’m not buying her or anyone else anything either. It doesn’t mean I don’t love her dearly.

          • Anonymous OP

            Eh, I have plenty of joy in other things. I just don’t like having stuff that I don’t absolutely need, and I don’t like receiving gifts because it makes me feel guilty. We didn’t exchange gifts growing up because we couldn’t afford groceries, so I guess a lot of this is a hold over from then. I dislike receiving stuff from my parents in particular because it feels like burdened them enormously in so doing.

            Not a big deal, but there are plenty of ways to be joyful that don’t involve stuff/ gifting.

          • Wildkitten

            I throw things I might like onto an amazon list throughout the year, and then my Christmas list is just whatever is still on that list that I haven’t already bought for myself by the end of the year. I do the same for people I buy presents for – I throw ideas on the list throughout the year and review like now.

        • Anonymous

          How about asking her to cook you something you remember fondly from your childhood but wouldn’t normally get to eat.

      • Blonde Lawyer

        What about something practical that you should have but will never spend the money on because you don’t see yourself using it right away? For example, emergency preparedness stuff. There is the LL Bean crank radio/flashlight combo. Everyone should have one but unless a blizzard is heading your way, you aren’t likely to run out and buy it now. I live somewhere that occasionally loses power so I’ve requested a camp stove. Do you drive? Car emergency kit. Think Geek has a product where you can jump start a car without opening the hood.

        What about upgrading some of the basics in your home? Are your towels or sheets getting old? You don’t need more stuff this way. You can donate the old ones to the animal shelter if you get new ones as gifts.

        Any tech to upgrade? Hate your home printer? What about printer cartridges. Those are always a pain when they run out the day before a deadline.

        • anon

          What about printer cartridges

          +1

          My mom gets me lots of useful stuff that I never think to get for myself until it’s too late-the best one being electric tooth brushes and replacement heads

        • Wildkitten

          Printer cartridges is actually a really good suggestion. I HATE buying printer cartridges! What about a laser printer?

    • Cat

      Try for 3-4 things in a range of prices, mix of practical and fun. For example, my list this year included a sturdy beach umbrella, a book of NYTimes crossword puzzles, a specific necklace from Brooks Bros (on sale), and a gift card for one of my favorite restaurants.

    • lawsuited

      I’m difficult to shop for, so my family often asks me for a Christmas list. I try to make it 5-7 things, ranging from $25 to $125 (only 1-2 things at the $125 price range – only my husband or my MIL would spend this much or my sisters might club together for one big gift in this price range) for varying budgets, but YMMV. I include some very specific things (for example, “Too Faced Boudoir Eyes eyeshadow pallette”) with places to buy it to help those family members who hate shopping, and I include some more general things (for example, “ceramic travel mug” or “red woven wool scarf”) for those who will have more fun hunting for the right scarf but don’t want to get me another blue scarf if I already have three.

    • Anonymous OP

      Can I ask for a gift card to a particular place (or give her a list of places that I shop?) Or is that not allowed for christmas gift giving?

      • Anonymous

        You know your mom best. Mine wouldn’t do this. She wants something she can wrap. What about picking something you’d like to buy from one of these places you’d like to shop?

      • Anonymous

        I would say not from your mother…Other family members including siblings I think is okay, but not from mom, but this also depends on the family I guess.

      • Anon in NYC

        For me and my family/in-laws, gift cards are okay.

        In terms of other ideas, I think WildKitten posted a website the other day that was really helpful – wirecutter DOT com. It lists the “best” of a lot of items that are really practical. I really want one of those fancy umbrellas that they discuss. The umbrellas are expensive so your mom can feel like she’s splurging, but it’s still a really practical gift.

      • Anonymous

        Have you asked her why she wants to give a gift suddenly? Maybe she misses you, or is worried about how much you’re working, or something else and she’s really just trying to connect? I don’t have any shared interests with my mom either, but I was thinking of suggesting that we go to a show she would like, because even if the show isn’t my thing I’d be happy to make mom happy by taking her out and being dressed up and having fancy cocktails after the show when she can tell me all about what she loved about it.

        • Anonymous OP

          This is interesting. I think she’s trying to connect. We’ve had a really terrible relationship my whole life and we’re really different people, so I think this is the only way she knows how to atone for misdeeds/ connect in general.

          • Anonymous

            If you want the same thing, even if it’s only for her sake, and if you have the time (!), would you consider asking her to teach you something? It would allow her to give (if she teaches you to cook a dish or something) and it lets her share in a way that could feel meaningful. The other option, for shared activities even without shared interests, is something you do side by side so you don’t have to make eye contact which makes conversation easier. Also, your hands are busy and you’ll have something to talk about. Maybe a shared adventure like a museum tour followed by coffee, or a museum art class – ours has ones that are only a couple of hours and under $10.

    • TCFKAG

      One more suggestion, though you’ve gotten lots, is to ask her to make a donation in your name to an important charity you value.

      We haven’t done that for Christmas, but for some of my past birthdays and such my in-laws have made donations to a charity dedicated to curing a chronic illness I have, rather than send presents.

      Heffers International is another one we frequently do at Christmas as a family group.

      • Anonymous

        does it get fuzzy after a while? I think I read that dry cleaning alleviates the getting fuzzy issue.

        • LilyStudent

          That depends on the fiber content. For expensive woollens, though, I would rather handwash myself (and lie flat to dry, as Zelda points out) than trust a dry cleaner. That said, my expensive woollens are all hand-knitted, so they have time and sentimental value.

        • Zelda

          The only reason why washing might cause pilling is if you’re rubbing the fabric together. You shouldn’t aggressively rub the fabrics but rely on soaking and gently squeezing the soapy water through the item to clean it. I also wash most of my clothes inside out so that any fading or pilling caused by friction happens on the inside.

        • MJ

          Some of my cashmere gets fuzzy (not pilled), just that the handfeel changes to fuzz, if I wash at home. That’s why I dry-clean all my cashmere!

    • Zelda

      Hand wash, lay flat to dry.. In general, it’s better to wash cashmere because the chemicals from dry cleaning may reduce its softness. I’ve even washed mine in the washer (delicate cycle, turned inside out inside a lingerie bag) with no ill effects.

      • Anonymous

        I have used the washer this way too for cashmere. My landsend cashmere has held up very well with this method.

      • anon

        +1
        I usually wash mine in a lingerie bag in the washer as well, on gentle cycle, unless there is any embellishment, in which case I hand wash. I’ve had no problems either.

    • Maddie Ross

      I’m the odd man out – I dry clean. I am awful at hand-washing (I feel like I never am able to rinse enough and that it never dries right).

    • Bonnie

      I wash cashmere in the machine on the gentlest setting and lay flat to dry. Dry cleaning makes cashmere stiff.

  4. Confession

    I am grateful for this blog.

    I want confess a prior sin: silk satin suits in the daytime, at work in an office. In was in my 20s. New job, no $, and too much Loehman’s.

  5. Anon

    I got a “slouchy” hat as a gift (link to follow). Would you wear something like this into the office? I’m not sure I like it.

    • Killer Kitten Heels

      Maybe this is regional, but I think anything that keeps your head warm is fair game to wear into the office, unless it’s particularly offensive in some way (like a hat with cuss words printed on it or something).

      I have a coworker who rocked one of those everyday for pretty much all of winter last year, and I always thought it looked really good on her, so I think if you like it it’s fine.

    • Cat

      if you like it and it’s your style, I don’t see anything wrong with wearing it as part of your normal winter commute outfit.

    • Wildkitten

      If you’re not sure and you don’t like it, don’t wear it to work. Part of the point of clothes is to make you FEEL good, in addition to looking appropriate and protecting yourself from the elements.

  6. Calling Talbots Audrey fans ...

    For fans of Talbots Audrey cashmere pullover- do you have other sweater favorites ? Bought one based on frequent mentions on this site and it fits beautifully, feels soft, and is really flattering compared to the dumpy cardi’s I have been wearing ( no more ). I can’t reasonably just wear Audrey’s in all colors – so what else am I missing?
    Any other standbys in wool or cashmere – crew, slight scoop, or turtleneck?

    • Cat

      and what’s wrong with wearing only Audreys? (says she who now rotates through 5 of them…)

    • anon

      I feel the same about the J Crew Tippi but it’s merino not cashmere. I have 5 different colors and also 6 of the Tippi cardigans. Have thought about about getting an Audrey in the gorgeous ocelot print and also the gorgeous riding red cashmere. I don’t mind duplicating when it’s things I love.

  7. Anonymous

    What’s a small change you’ve made in your style/clothing/accessories that was fairly simple and not terribly expensive but made your look a lot more put together?

    • ANP

      Scarves! Or any accessory, really. Paying attention to small details like makes me feel as though I look much more polished. (You could say the same thing for nails, hair, polished/well-kept shoes, etc.)

      • lsw

        +1 I have found that incorporating scarves and jewelry (mostly necklaces) helps me look way more professional and put together. I look young for my age so they also can help to make me look more professional. I subscribe to the “third piece” mentality where you want something to tie together your pant/skirt and top. Charming Charlie’s has really inexpensive scarves. And if you have a Ten Thousand Villages near you they have gorgeous silk scarves that are reasonably priced (and fair trade!).

    • LilyStudent

      Wearing my hair up. I have longish hair that can never decide if it wants to be straight or wavy, and sometimes just goes for frizzy.

      On days when it’s up (either in one of those hair tuck things, a bun around a smallish bun donut thing, or a neat French plait), I feel so much more put-together. Recently for uni I’ve been doing ponytails and half-ponytails with a black ribbon around the band, but that’s a bit ‘young’ and casual for work, I think.

    • ss

      I’ve been wearing a recent gift of Tahitian pearls with pretty much everything and reckon they really make everything look better, and there’s the additional pleasure of making the giver (my mum) very happy to see them in such frequent use. They are off-round with visible dinks, so ‘not terribly expensive’ in the sense of being quite a lot cheaper than similarly large and lustrous round pearls with perfect surfaces.

    • kc

      Better makeup. So this doesn’t fall under “not terribly expensive”, but I had to buy the makeup for my wedding day anyways. I feel so much more put together with better foundation and blush.

    • ITDS

      Ironing. Especially when I was in a business casual environment, making sure that pants had a crease and sweaters/blouses were not all wrinkly really made me look and feel put together.

    • Bonnie

      I’ve been buying less and focusing on better quality and fit. The items are more expensive but since I buy less, I’m not spending more.

    • Anon in NYC

      Switching to wearing primarily skirts/dresses. I could never get dress pants to fit me well without a lot of tailoring, and even then I still wasn’t happy with how I looked. I feel so much more pulled together now.

      • Anon in NYC

        Also, I decided to primarily buy clothes that were neutrals and/or solid colors, with the occasional conservative print. For a while I had been trying to develop a work wardrobe that was both “fun” and “professional” and I realized that was just not my style. Simple, neutral clothes in conservative cuts make me feel more confident.

    • TCFKAG

      One thing that was a bit longer term, I stopped for about two years buying anything black, which greatly expanded my options of non-black neutrals and colors.

      The other was just actually utilizing my jewelry collection – I always wear at least a necklace and usually earrings to work. I didn’t necessarily expand the collection itself (though I have over time) but rather simply started wearing stuff everyday rather than only special occasions.

    • Baconpancakes

      Blow-drying my hair. Having my hair look “done” every day lets me feel more polished regardless of what I’m wearing, lets me feel like I can wear less makeup, and makes me more confident about wearing glasses instead of contacts. I used to hate to do it because it wouldn’t look good and would damage my hair, but since I started doing it more, I got better at it, figured out what works, and discovered dry shampoo and heat protecting spray, so I only blow dry twice a week at most.

    • ac

      Monthly eyebrow waxing.

      Taking clothes that don’t quite fit correctly to the tailor — so worth the $10-20 to get the correct fit & not be uncomfortable in a particular item.

    • anon

      Wearing makeup every day. Simple: <5 minutes to sweep mineral foundation, blush/color, and setting powder, plus a colored chapstick.

    • Sunshine

      Belts! Thick ones over the waistband of my skirt when I wear a blouse or sweater tucked in. Thin ones over a sweater when it’s not tucked into my skirt.

  9. lucy stone

    Lands’ End has Ashby shoes on clearance (with another 40% off) today for the fans. I sold mine to another reader of this site, but I know they are popular here!

  10. Shopaholic

    Shopping dilemma – I found a bag I’ve been ogling for years at 60% off (but it’s $1000 bag so still a substantial chunk of change).

    It’s not the color I was thinking of getting at full price but it is beautiful and really versatile.

    Can you ladies either enable me or talk me about of it?

    • Anonymous

      You’re going to spend a thousand dollars on a second choice bag? That’s absurd. Don’t do it.

      • Shopaholic

        No it’s approx $450 and not a second choice bag but in a gorgeous teal instead of the black I was initially thinking of getting if I managed to pull the trigger on a $1000+ bag

        • tesyaa

          I love the color teal, but if you’re not going to get the same wear out of it as you would with the black, it’s not worth it IMO.

        • Maddie Ross

          Not directly trying to enable, but I personaly prefer a colored bag to a black bag. So much more fun! And I honestly think a color goes with more than a black bag does.

        • Anonymous

          A $450 TEAL bag when you originally fell for a black bag sounds like a stupid waste of money.

          My general rule is if I don’t love it at full price it’s not worth it on sale. No one needs a teal bag so it should be something you’re over the moon for not a sale item you’re getting because it’s a good deal.

        • Zelda

          A $450 teal bag is totally worth it to me. I agree with Maddie that I’d get tons of use out of a teal bag, as I tend to carry colored bags more than black! Send the link my way if you decide not to get it!

        • Shopaholic

          Thanks ladies. I think I may pull the trigger because the color would definitely be really versatile.

          FWIW, (and I’m not sure why I’m trying to justify myself to some rude stranger on the internet who thinks I’m stupid) I didn’t fall in love with the black bag. I fell in love with the bag itself and hadn’t yet decided on a color. I just thought if I was getting an expensive bag, I should get something more neutral but I agree that I think colored bags can go with anything.

          • Anonymous

            Dude srsly? You asked for people to talk you in or out if it! Yeah, I think it’s a stupid waste of money. YOU ASKED. Ugh.

          • NYtoCO

            To be fair, you asked someone to either enable you or talk you out of it. She was talking you out of it, and while she was blunt I don’t think she was rude.

          • Anonymous

            You asked for people’s opinions. If you only wanted validation, why bother asking?

          • Shopaholic

            I did want opinions but I guess I take issue with being called stupid. Thank you for all the advice and comments.

          • Anonymous

            Stupid waste of money.

            Not Shopaholic you’re an idiot.

            Be less defensive or internet less.

          • Wildkitten

            Yeah the “stupid” was unnecessary. But the rest of her comment was spot on.

        • Meg Murry

          teal does not seem a versatile to me as black, so I wouldn’t do it if I were you. do you love the teal, or just kinda “oh, ok”? I personally don’t spend $450 on things I don’t love (or even things I do, but my budget is a lot lover than most people around here. Have you seen it in person or will you be buying it from somewhere with a good return policy if the teal isn’t as gorgeous in person as it is on screen? Will this fulfill your wish for this bag, or will you still be wanting the black $1000 in a year?

          There now, I’ve tried to talk you out of it – but do as you will :-)

          • Wildkitten

            This. I don’t buy handbags I don’t LOVE. Since handbags always fit, I see no reason to compromise like I might with clothes or shoes.

    • mintberrycrunch

      To enable, I have a $400 dark teal work bag that I carry every day, and it goes with EVERYTHING in my wardrobe (black, navy, tan, grey, white, brights, pastels, you name it). It works in all seasons. It never looks out of place. Of cours YMMV, but I think teal is a lot more versatile than people think.

  12. Cat

    Blog etique**e question. I’ve noticed that many bloggers have started linking to items without giving readers any hint as to the product or brand- like K@t did above with the “similar” items. I assume from the type of embedded links (whether rstyle, shopstyle or others) that the blogger gets some revenue, either from a mere click-through or by subsequent tracking via cookies – for example, I’ve heard that rstyle tracks your purchases for at least 30 days, even if you returned to the store webs!te on your own later.

    1. Am I out of line for expecting K@t to follow the normal disclosure guidelines for these types of links? (the “L = x” methodology) Or any other type of heads up that these are revenue generating / tracking – the nature of the link?

    2. Am I too cranky that there is no description of the item to avoid the rstyle/shopstyle cookies and tracking? (In my defense I don’t think I can clear cookies on my work computer without admin permission – so there’s not an easy workaround.)

    I get that bloggers want to make money, but … thoughts?

    • tesyaa

      I’m not sure how you are being injured here. But if you want to be extra cautious, only use your home computer for surfing so you can block/remove cookies?

    • roses

      There is an easy workaround, though it’s cumbersome – when you see a targeted ad, click the little blue triangle in the upper right hand corner of the ad. It will take you to a page where you can opt out of being tracked by certain ad companies. You may have to do this for multiple companies, but if you do it frequently enough it will significantly reduce how often you’re tracked.

    • Wildkitten

      Hmm. I didn’t even notice that the “L5” disclaimer was gone. I wonder why that is? I just assume everything from thiss!te is a cookie link.

    • Meg Murry

      I personally wish I could see the items without having to click on the links – especially for Amazon, as it then add it to “items like ones you recently viewed”.

      But on the other hand, I greatly appreciate the addition of plus sized and cheaper picks, and I like this s!te overall – so if Kat makes some money off my shopping after reading here, I’m ok with that. I’ve actually made a point of clicking on a link from here occasionally when I want to buy something from a s!te that has been recently mentioned – after all, I want this s!te to continue to exist, giving Kat a small click-through link payment that costs me nothing is a small price to pay.

      But if you really don’t want to be tracked, you could right click and choose “open in private window” (Firefox) or “open link in incognito window” (Chrome). And if your work computer only lets you use IE, well that’s a whole separate issue that is on your company, not Kat.

      • Cat

        yes, stuck with IE – don’t get me started on that. I also appreciate the expanded choices that K@t has been including – I think it’s mostly the lack of disclosure on how these links work that’s bothering me. I’d feel better about the tracking if I knew exactly what was going on / how my info is used / how the blogger is ultimately compensated, weird as that sounds. But that applies to a LOT of bloggers.

    • mascot

      If you use Chrome, you can use the Ghostery extension to turn off certain tracking.

    • TCFKAG

      I believe Kat has an explanation page explaining exactly how she gets paid for her links – but if it isn’t uptodate, send her a message asking.

      But honestly, it doesn’t bother me knowing she gets a small amount if I click on or buy the item because (a) I’ve never seen any evidence of her recommending things just for the money (other than her sponsored posts of course) and (b) there’s no such thing as a free lunch, so I don’t expect her to run this website for nothing.

      But in the past when people have asked her about this, she has been very responsive.

      • Kat G

        Just ducking into the post now to see what people thought of the Lepore jacket and seeing this thread now, sorry! I took the L-# disclaimer out since I was the only blogger on the planet doing that — even Lucky and major magazine sites are putting in affiliate links. I’m fine to add the L-# back in though — disclosure is important to me. I’d say I can monetize about 95% of the links that I post (maybe more at this point) — the Hobbs sale in today’s SOTW is an example of one where I don’t have affiliate links; just liked the sale and the suit.

        You can always tell when a link is an affiliate one if you mouse over it and see that it doesn’t take you to the main site. For example, a straight Nordstrom link would look like http://nordstrom.com — most of mine will look like this: http://click.linksynergy.com/(with a million things after it) or http://www.anrdoezrs.net/… (with a million things after it) or http://rstyle.me/(with a few numbers after it). Some bloggers hide the affiliate link with a http://bit.ly link, but for the most part I’m too lazy to do that. All of those links mean that we get a small cut of whatever you purchase after you click through… sometimes the cookies last a few days; sometimes they last a few weeks; sometimes it’s 2% , sometime’s it’s 25%. Even I have trouble keeping track of them because they change.

        The other kind of link you see is more of a CPC link, I guess — if instead of going through a rstyle or click.linksynergy link the link is going through Shopstyle, that means that the blogger is getting paid every time you CLICK on the link — which encourages more of the “here, here, here” stuff. The payment varies from fractions of a penny to more substantial amounts based on how much you buy at the end of the link, but the blogger only gets money for the clicking, not a commission like you would with an affiliate amount. (At least, that’s my understanding of it.) I almost never use this kind of link, but it’s just a personal preference.

        We’ve been doing the “here” and “here” because it takes time to grab the correct product name and it kind of muddies up the look of the page — the “here and here” bit looks cleaner to me.

        I’ll add back in the L-# if it’s in question though — like I said, disclosure and transparency is important to me. Here’s my old page on it: https://corporette.com/affiliates/

        • Cat

          Thanks for responding, K@t. It’s become more and more prevalent as you note – I appreciate the struggle finding the right balance between earning money off the blog and disclosures.

  13. Batgirl

    I work in an open office environment and have some neighbors about ten feet over who have literally been chit-chatting non-stop all week. This week has been particularly bad, but they generally chat loudly all day and use “full voice” for phone calls at their desk. I’m wondering how to approach them about this because it’s gotten to the point where it’s extremely distracting. My two direct reports have also complained to me about it but our office management has not been very helpful. Is there a polite way to say “hey, I know that you’re within your rights to talk to one another, but my team has been having a very difficult time concentrating on their work lately and we were hoping you could be mindful of that.” Maybe that’s it right there? I don’t particularly want to say this to all four of them together, though–particularly while my team is within earshot. My boss doesn’t work in the same office so I can’t push this up the chain either.

  14. A Nonny Moose

    I didn’t get a chance to pop back in yesterday, but I definitely want to thank everyone who replied to my knitting question in the afternoon thread! Very helpful!

    • NOLA

      I wasn’t around yesterday afternoon but I think you could put together a sort of kit of needles and accessories – tape measure, stitch markers, cable needle, stitch holders, point protectors, a project bag, row counter, a Susan Bates knit chek (measures gauge and helps you determine needle size if you don’t have markers on your circulars), tapestry needles. I also have a tiny tiny pair of hello kitty scissors that I carry in my purse for when I’m knitting somewhere (like on a plane) and have to cut off one skein and start a new one.

      Here’s a link to a beginner’s toolkit: http://www.yarn.com/webs-knitting-accessories-knitting-tools/webs-knitting-tools-knitters-tool-kit-beginner/

      • LilyStudent

        Ooh, that’s a good idea – though I wouldn’t include the cable needle. When I thought you had to use a cable needle for cables I built them up into something horrendously difficult and time-consuming. Turns out you can just move the stitches around without one. Who knew? (Oh, half of Ravelry…)

        • NOLA

          Ha ha. Yeah. I prefer a cable needle but that’s just because I can’t be trusted not to drop the stitches otherwise…

        • tesyaa

          I just use a regular double-pointed needle for cables – do I even need that?

          • LilyStudent

            You don’t! When I found out how to cable without any needle, it changed my knitting life. No exaggeration. Use your favourite search engine – there are lots of videos.

  15. IV Iron Supplement

    Has anyone received iron intravenously? What side effects did you experience? My doctor wants to administer IV iron to me on Friday, but I leave for Hawaii on Saturday and I am worried about having an adverse reaction.

    • Casper

      I’ve had it. I didn’t notice any side effects at all but I was very sick, hospitalized, and on many other IV meds at the time so side effects may have been masked by other things

    • Blonde Lawyer

      Any chance you could get your doctor to do it today instead so you have more time to react/recover if necessary? Oral iron can upset my stomach but I would assume that IV iron would avoid irritating the GI tract but I’m not a doctor.

    • YouSaucyMinx

      I’ve had this done. I was a little nauseous for a few hours after, and a but sleepy, but I was fine and actually had a ton more energy the next day.

    • MU JD

      I had this earlier this year. My doctor indicated that the most common side effect is stomach issues (nausea, constipation, etc.) but I didn’t have any of that and actually felt so much better the next day. Also, if you are put on an iron supplement, take it as directed. If I miss a day, I am sluggish and miserable for 2-3 days afterwards. Good luck!

    • Chi Squared

      I have. I didn’t experience any side-effects attributable to the iron, but I was not in the best of health at the time b/c I was pregnant, and developing HELLP syndrome.

  17. Zelda

    Any suggestions for a pine scented candle that (a) smells good and (b) has a strong scent? So far I’ve spent $35 on candles and even the expensive ones ($15-20 is expensive to me) don’t give off much scent when lit. My goal is for my house to smell like Christmas!

    • Wildkitten

      I find the cinnamon pine cones and brooms from Whole Foods work better than the pine scented candles. (I haven’t had good luck with them either.)

    • kc

      There are these little pine scented sticks that you can hang on your tree that are really pungent. They sell them at home depot and bed, bath, and beyond. And febreeze makes a spray that I swear smells just like a christmas tree and is only $4

    • Sydney Bristow

      I like Bath & Body Works candles. I don’t have any pine scented ones but there are often reviews describing how strong the throw is.

    • Katie

      Thymes in Frasier Fir smells just like a Christmas tree- nothing cloying or fake. They’re a bit pricy, but I bought a two ounce votive this year and it’s lasted through quite a few nights.

      • anon

        +1 to Thymes

        they also have a diffuser that I use year round (because I’m cool like that) and I highly recommend.

    • Anon.

      Archipelago Botanicals Pine candle. Pricey, but lasts for hours and hours and has the best, non-cloying, clear pine scent. I love it and use it year-round.

  18. Wildkitten

    Do any lawyers read Harvard Business Review? I’ve liked some of their leadership articles online, but am not sure if it’s worth the subscription. (I like some of Fortune’s online articles too, but the actual magazine seems to be for people with… fortunes…)

    • Becca

      No HBR but I’ve subscribed to Fortune since college and I only came into my fortune after working for 12 years and marrying well. (tounge in cheek- we are doing ok and working towards that fortune). Fortune is great for general business articles. I work in-house and I have always felt up to date on what’s going on in the business world thanks to the magazine and it has provided me good elevator discussion topics with the CEO and CFO. However, it also depends on how much you care about business articles and if you would spend the time reading them up on the internet. There are ads for luxury items but I generally ignore them as they don’t apply to my budget and a lot of the articles are great.

    • kc

      You can follow their blog network and also get like 5 free articles a month with free registration, I think. See if your organization will pay for it. Do you have a library (or info center) within your law firm? They usually have subscriptions or a way to access it electronically. Librarian speaking….

  19. Uhhh

    There is a particular partner at my firm that I do not like working for. At all. I’m a third year associate and have been with my current firm for a few months now. The guy is socially awkward (at best) but is also a complete jerk (to use a lighter phrase for the real word that I’m thinking about). I hate it. He is the worst. It’s his attitude and his I’m a partner holier than thou treatment that is repulsive. No other attorney that I have ever worked with has been so difficult and, frankly, rude. But I can’t make hours without working with him. Advice or commiseraiton appreciated.

    • MJ

      A lot of law firms have toxic partners, and it’s no mistake that he latched on to you as the new associate.

      I would do what you need to do to work on his matters (and just remember that he’s a bad person and grit your teeth). The LT action plan would be to load your billables up with other partners’ matters (so try to get in good with their senior associates, talk to your staffer, if you have one, or…as you build more credibility…you can tell a a partner that you have a _very_ good working relationship with that you prefer working with him to Ogre partner.)

      I think biglaw sometimes breeds these awful partners. If there are any ways you can politely push back–if he’s verbally abusive, ask him if you can chat later. If he dumps things on you last minute, don’t respond right away if it’s a Friday night….do things that are not fatal in biglaw but that might make you less of his favorite. This is not the kind of partner that cares what associates or anyone else thinks of him, but I am sure he thinks he owns you. So have a little bit of polite gumption if he’s being super-duper unreasonable. Overall, in biglaw, you’re not fully going to get away from this guy unless you move groups/floors, get pulled off of clients by a more powerful partner, or get loaded down with a huge case/deal so that you can’t work for bad partner anymore.

      SO SORRY!!!!

      • ac

        Agree with this — your only avenue as a junior/new lateral associate is to fill your plate with other work & cultivate other sponsors/allies so that you can (accurately) state, “Sorry, jerkface, I’m occupied on [BIG IMPORTANT WORK] for [IMPORTANT PARTNER] but I can pencil you in for a week from Tuesday.”

    • Toffee

      Commiseration, except my problem is a senior associate with that attitude. No one else will work with him. Yesterday, he said it’s just us working the case (we need at least two more people) and I came so close to replying, well it’s about to be just you, buddy, if you don’t drop the attitude. *sigh* Honestly, I’m looking for a way out. And I work as few hours as I can. I never apologize, refuse to argue, and just keep my head up.

  20. Sweater PSA

    I just got the Everlane luxe sweater (the long sleeve crew neck one) and the crew neck cashmere sweater and they both seem like really great quality and are so soft! The fit is a little more slouchy than average, I got the same size I would get at say, JCrew, and the fit is looser but not so loose that I would necessarily size down (and definitely not as loose as a JCrew boyfriend fit). They also have free shipping on now. Hope this helps someone who is looking for some soft good quality sweaters! https://www.everlane.com/r/86pa5n

  21. In search of perfect tan pants

    So far the camel- colored pants I want only exist in my head…something midway between casual and dressy . I’m picturing a washable brushed twill. Basically a lady-version of khakis, for business casual. Gray and black were pretty easy to find, and more forgiving in fit than a lighter color, but I’m in the south so I really need some lighter pants. They need to be a relaxed fit and fabric with a little substance or heft- not clingy. Any help greatly appreciated!

  22. Anonymous

    I’m getting married soon and I’m wondering whether there are any compelling reasons I should get a wedding ring. My fiance said he liked the idea, but I don’t think he cares terribly much either way, and I don’t either. I also don’t feel like having to choose one. So I’m wondering if there are any functional (as opposed to sentimental) reasons I should get one?

    I’m the not-liking-stuff poster above, for context, and I don’t have an engagement ring, so I’m talking about either wearing a simple band or nothing at all.

    • Anonymous

      Primarily it’s a visual indication that you are married. Certainly not a must, and also totally fine to wear a plain simple band.

      But I think it’s sometimes important to let others show their love for you by accepting stuff. Not always and not to excess, but not feeling like choosing one doesn’t seem like a terribly good reason.

      • Anonymous

        Well if he actively wanted to, I’d absolutely do it. I don’t actively want it or not want it, I’m just sort of neutral. Obviously I’ll ask him; I’m just wondering if there are other reasons I might want to get one.

    • Monday

      I don’t think there’s much reason to get one if you don’t want to. The only purely functional reason I know is to deter well-meaning single folks from thinking you’re available. However, even this isn’t a perfect signaling system, so it’s not much of an argument. FWIW, I have both an engagement ring and a wedding band myself.

    • RLS

      I don’t wear one. It is weird to some people, but I think everyone is used to it by now. I don’t have any functional reasons you should wear one.

      I will say that occasionally I get hit on by a barista or professor or what not, but for the most part my hyphenated name is enough of an indicator that I’m married to people I work with, see on a consistent basis, etc that it doesn’t get awkward. I bet even ladies wearing a ring get hit on, so I doubt my lack of a ring has affected that much.

    • Samantha

      I’m not into stuff generally either (though maybe don’t feel as strongly about it as you do), and I don’t wear an engagement ring. I wear a thin ring on my left hand ring finger and have thought about swapping it for a plain band, but never got around to it. I feel like it helps to *signal* that I’m married in various situations, just by wearing something on that finger.

      Otherwise, for instance, my child’s teachers may wonder if my husband and I are together (not just idle speculation, it creates more work for them if they have to notify separately etc.). Signalling may help if you tend to get hit on – sadly those days seem to be behind me! :)

      • tesyaa

        I take my rings off when I get home from work, and if I have a school event or something else in the evening, I sometimes forget to put them back on. Then I wonder if my kids’ teachers are wondering if my husband and I split up. But there is absolutely no functional reason to wear a wedding ring.

    • AIMS

      My parents never wore their rings but they did have them and I now have both of theirs. They make me happy. I guess that’s more of a sentimental reason but I think it’s nice to have something simple if you’re getting married even if you don’t necessarily wear it all the time (they wore theirs only for traveling).

    • MNF

      I look young, so I think it helps age me a bit. On two occasions I have gotten into a bar when I forgot my id by using the “but look, I’m married, I must be at least 21” line. My husband sometimes uses his plain band to open bottles.

      • Anonymous

        Hmm. Yeah I would consider it for this reason. I’m frequently mistaken for a high school student, but I’m in my late 20s.

    • Wildkitten

      If I were debating I would get an inexpensive plain band and wear it or not wear it as I see fit. I think wearing rings in general takes some getting used to. (Physically, not culturally – bracelets can also annoy me.)

    • Anonymous

      Late to the party but I like having a wedding ring because I don’t wear my engagement ring all the time. If I’m traveling, I just wear the band. Or when I go running, or whatever.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      I’m sentimental and I like the symbolism of always having something on me that he put on my finger as we got married and vice versa. It’s a symbol of your promise to each other. It’s a piece of him with you all of the time. (Not in a creepy stalker way but in a sentimental way). If I look down and see it while typing, I think of him.

      I think there is some historical context too where you are making a contract with each other and you are passing something of value as consideration, making it a real “contract” and not just a promise.

      Other practical reason, you always have something of value on you in an emergency that you can pawn? I hope it never comes to that of course!

      • Wildkitten

        Whoa. I never thought of the ring as consideration for the contract. Lawyer nerd alert – I really like that idea. I will add that to my imaginary vows.

  23. Along eyebrow wax lines

    Has anyone found a good way to deal with hair above your lip? I don’t find it that noticeable, but every time I get my eyebrows threaded she wants to do my lip too, and it scares me — I don’t want it to grow back thicker, or get ingrown hair issues there. Anyone have thoughts?

    • Alice

      I get mine threaded, and there are no adverse effects as long as my skin is clean going in (i.e., no makeup or sunscreen on). It does not grow back thicker. I do find that it hurts a bit more for me, though.

    • McBagel

      I get mine waxed. It’s red for a bit immediately after but then no issues.

    • Samantha

      I get asked that question too every time I go to thread my eyebrows, but I feel like that’s just them angling for more business rather than a hint that my lip is hairy! Or maybe most people who do their eyebrows also do their lip at the same time, but I never have. I feel like the hair is fine and not noticeable and worry about threading making it grow back oddly. It’s supposed to grow back thinner but may be patchy. Besides, that’s a sensitive area and more painful.
      I have tried threading/waxing my “sideburns” – why is this not an issue more women have? Or do they deal with it and I just don’t know? It turned my skin very red and now I’ve gone back to just trimming with scissors instead, which is probably not as good.

    • anon

      I never thought it was that noticeable, but gave in one day to the person waxing my eyebrows and now I feel like I notice it & have to keep doing it. I picked up some of those DIY wax strips (the kind that you warm between your hands before using), and that works fine & makes me less red than the salon waxing. Unlike eyebrows, there’s no skill involved with the shaping or putting the wax only in certain places, you’re just removing hair, so I’m comfortable doing it myself.

  24. Gail the Goldfish

    I need a gift recommendation. My dad drinks a lot of coffee so I want to get him a thermos, but the trick is he needs to be able to drink out of it while driving, so it needs like a flip top lid. I found some previous threads recommending Nissan and Zojirushi thermoses, but those look like they all have screw-on caps unless I am missing some. Any suggestions?

  25. OHCFO

    Ladies–Do any of the rest of you work in a binder-centric office? It seems like every project or issue I work on has a binder or 7 associated with it–usually a 2-4 inch one. My office is full of bookcases lined with binders. And they’re always falling down or slipping around on the shelves oddly. Has anyone discovered a way to keep many binders neatly arranged on their shelves? For context, a quick count has me at over 40 binders wobbling around on my shelves. Thanks!

    • Wildkitten

      Do you need to keep all of them? You can put some backwards so they don’t slip, if you don’t need the binding labels visible.

  26. Anon

    Does anyone have a kindle and want to comment on how useful/cost effective it is?

    • Anonymous

      I read this as “Does anyone have a kid and want to comment on how useful/cost effective it is?”

      And, sadly, my tired brain thought, “Not at all!” Ha ha. Sorry dear little baby who I love so much.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      If you have a tablet you can download a free Kindle app. For me, that is good enough and I don’t need an actual Kindle. However, if you think you want the smaller product but want to test the software, the app software is the same I believe as what is on the actual Kindle product.

    • ANP

      Love my Kindle (I have an old(er) school black and white one). I also read occasionally on the Kindle app on my iPhone and iPad. While you can download purchased books to the app, I don’t think you can take advantage of the A m a z o n Prime borrow-1-free-Kindle-book-per-month deal unless you have a physical Kindle.

    • Brit

      I have the Kindle Fire and I haven’t used it much for reading in the year I’ve had it honestly. It was given to me as a gift, otherwise I probably wouldn’t have purchased it on my own. I’ve used it some while traveling for reading, but I still have a lot of physical books that I need to get through in my library. I do like the apps that are available and I did use it for my textbooks this past semester and that was nice.

    • Miss Behaved

      Love, love, love my kindle and read everyday. When my first one died after a couple of years, Amazon gave me a discount on a new one and I upgraded. I read during my commute on the T, on the treadmill, at home after work and on the beach during the summer.

      And if you get kindle unlimited (free the first month and $9.99/month after) a lot of books are free. Also, some books are lending enabled and you can borrow books from your local library.

      Honestly, I’d be bereft without mine.

    • Philanthropy Girl

      I also have the older b/w touch screen Kindle. I have found it particularly useful for obtaining free and/or obscure books. It is also particularly handy for traveling. It has saved me buying books while on the road, library fines and the hassle of getting books through inter-library loan. My husband has a newer one – maybe a Fire? It has little attractiveness for me because I prefer accessing apps on my smart phone. However, he has found some apps that have been useful to him as a musician that would not be useful on his smart phone due to screen size.

      While I prefer the tactile pleasure of an actual book, I appreciate the ease of obtaining a book and carrying it in my purse or weekender bag that the Kindle affords.

    • Wildkitten

      I love my kindle for reading books. It’s lighter than a book, I can read first chapter for free, I can get kindle books from the library, and there are no distractions. Very useful. Very cost effective.

      I also have a kindle fire. I use it for playing – videos and apps. I can read books on it but usually get distracted instead. It’s cheaper than an ipad and runs all the apps and the free Amazon prime videos. Less “useful” but still cost effective.

      • Anon

        This is my experience too. I have an older one. I really prefer the electronic ink screen to the LED (?) backlit ones. To me it’s more restful to read although you need a light.
        I have saved a lot of hassle and time checking out library books on it.

    • Parfait

      I love it for traveling and I love that I can get library books without having to go there. Cost effective? Not really the point. The point is that I need never again experience the horror of being stuck somewhere with nothing to read, because I can carry as many books with me as I want with no added weight in my bag.

    • Kindle

      I just use my ipad mini. I also have a nook, but once I got the ipad (gift) I haven’t used it. My husband has a kindle, but he’s not at all tech savvy and even though I showed him he can get some of the books he likes on it, he prefers (and it’s a LOT cheaper) for him to keep haunting used book stores, garage sales, and flea markets. If his favorite used book store ever closes, we’re in big trouble. Between my nook and his kindle, I preferred my nook, but that was at least partly because I was more familiar with the nook. Again, since the ipad, neither of us have looked back.

      I’ve found that the ipad mini is not as useful in my life as I had hoped it would be. I mostly use it for reading, my todoist list, occasional notes and lists, and various games. It’s not all that useful in work, and since it’s wifi only, it’s not as useful as I thought it would be in travel. But overall I still love it.

      I can also get library books on all three.

      My best advice would be to ask friends/family if you can look at theirs and see what kind of interface you like. Also, what kind of tech do you already have?

      The surface and the fire both look interesting and I haven’t had the chance to play with either of them much.

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