ByElizabeth Hours Updated
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Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Ruffle Sweater Dress

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A woman wearing a burgundy sweater dress and gold necklace

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

We’re well into sweater dress season in the Northeast, and this one from J.Crew is a stunner. I would add a navy blazer and boots for the office and keep this on hand for all of the holiday dinners/open houses/recitals that are starting to make their way onto my calendar.

The dress is $178 full price at J.Crew — 30% off today with code — and comes in sizes XXS-3X. It also comes in navy and black. 

Sales of note for 4/17:

  • Nordstrom – Beauty savings event, up to 25% off – nice price on Black Honey
  • Ann Taylor – Cyber Spring! 50% off everything + free shipping
  • Boden – 25% off everything (thru Sun, then 15% off)
  • Brooklinen – 25% off sitewide — we have and love these sateen sheets
  • Evereve – 1000+ items on sale, including lots from Alex Mill, Michael Stars, Sanctuary, Rails, Xirena, and Z-Supply
  • Express – $29 dresses
  • J.Crew – 30% off all dresses
  • J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything, and extra 50% off clearance
  • Lands' End – 50% off full price styles and 60% off all clearance and sale – lots of ponte dresses come down under $25, and this packable raincoat in gingham is too cute
  • Loft – Friends & Family event, 50% off entire purchase + free shipping
  • Macy's – 25% off already reduced prices + 15% off beauty & fragrance
  • M.M.LaFleur – Spring Sale Event – Buy More, save more! 10% off $250+, 15% off $500+, 20% off $750+, 25% off $1000+ (Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off if you find any exclusions.)
  • Sephora – Spring sale! 20%, 15%, or 10% off depending on your membership tier; ends 4/20. Here's everything I recommend in the sale!
  • Talbots – Spring sale! 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns
  • TOCCIN – Use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off!
  • Vivrelle – Looking to own less stuff but still try trends? Use code CORPORETTE for a free month, and borrow high-end designer clothes and bags!

205 Comments

  1. How often do you host friends at your home? Husband and I are 30 and just bought a large dining room table so we have more room to host now. Also, do you take people up on their offer to bring something for the meal?

    Trying to socialize more as it gets dark early!

    1. Before kids, like probably friends 2x/month. Occasional family. After kids, friends probably monthly but family probably 2-3x/month.

      I like to ask them to bring an app or a dessert usually. It’s easy – ‘oh, could you handle dessert?? We’re having X for dinner and Susan is allergic to walnuts but anything else sounds great.’

      Key for me for entertaining is not to let perfect be the enemy of good. Rainy day? Bring the kids over to play board games and we’ll have coffee and chat. Pizza on a Friday? It doesn’t need to be gourmet to be fun.

    2. I probably host once a month, from bigger parties to just a single person or couple.
      Being sort of in academia has the advantage that it’s okay to keep some habits alive which may be looked down upon as student-like. Potlucks are still the norm here, or me cooking dinner and guests bringing salad or dessert. I embrace it.

    3. way more likely to have people stop by for a drink (whether coffee, tea, flavored water, or wine / c-cktails) and a nibble than host a formal meal.

    4. Definitely take people up on their offer to bring something for the meal! That will make entertaining just a bit easier and lighten/share the load, which otherwise can be a massive barrier to entertaining. Good for you – if I were starting again, I would worry less about cleaning/serving perfect food, and more about creating community and having the house where lots of people created great memories.

    5. If guests want to bring something make it an item that doesn’t need to go in the oven (like an appetizer ready to serve, salad, or dessert). Otherwise you’ll be playing tetris and struggle to keep everything warm.

      If you’d like to host often then make it easy on yourself. Pick forgiving dishes that are hard to mess up (like lasagna or a slow cooked brisket). Minimize the number of things that require active cooking just before guests arrive or while they’re in your house. Create a self-serve drink station so your guests can occupy themselves if you’re running behind schedule. Have everything ready for them like sliced citrus, mixers, an ice bucket, jiggers, corkscrew, and a variety of glassware. Dim the lights, play some music, and scatter unscented candles for ambience.

      1. Playing some music is key! I have a party playlist and a more chill one. It really sets the mood and helps conversation flow, especially in the first awkward 15 minutes when it’s slow going.

    6. About once a week!

      I live downtown and many of my friends are also downtown or adjacent areas (so can walk or take the bus) and we get together at someone’s house at least once a week.

      I also just moved into a bigger space with room for a dining table so am really taking advantage of it.

      We’re early – mid 30s, about half are married and half of us are single. No one has kids yet.

      We do a lot of potlucks, casual wine and tv or byo knitting nights, and “hey I made dinner and have enough to share, who wants to join”, in addition to parties, book club, game night, themed nights, and nicer dinners.

      Almost everything is potluck style which makes it easy to keep doing

    7. My two best friends come over once a week to have dinner with me and my kids (we rotate who brings dinner or just order takeout), and I host people on the weekend maybe once a month. In addition, my family visits from out of town for a week every few months.

      I find it relatively easy to host my family and close friends because they aren’t going to judge me for the state of my house or care whether we just get takeout. So, it’s easy. For less close friends, I probably do that once a quarter and do more prep for them.

    8. We usually host people about twice per month, but it fluctuates with how busy we are and what else might be going on in life. Lately, we’ve hosted about once per month and kept it to only close friends and family. DH is working on a renovation projects, stuff from the “cleaned out” room is spread out all over the house, and I’m not comfortable with “new” people seeing our home the way it is.

      We often take people up on their offer to bring something for the meal. The easiest is dessert or appetizers. Occasionally, we’re in the mood for a more formal dinner party and take care of everything.

      FWIW, we have one kid, and we’ve hosted several dinner parties with other kids from his class and their parents. We’ve arranged a kids’ table and a parents’ table, and the kids absolutely love it. We order a couple of pizzas for the kids, and the kids can choose to eat pizza, whatever we’ve cooked, or both. After dinner, we go outside, the adults sit around our outdoor table, and the kids run around in the yard.

    9. Monthly and family-friendly (lots of our friends have kiddos close to our son’s age) for smaller gatherings. We do take people up on their offer to bring something, but keep it easy. I usually tell people they don’t need to bring anything but themselves, but you can bring a side/salad/dessert if you really want to. We host larger events a few times a year for sporting event watch parties, and those are socialized as potlucks.

    10. Big parties, once every couple months. Friends, once a month or so.

      I keep it very simple. Usually a seasonal theme. Then either I make a main and ask people to bring related sides (everyone bring a soup!) or order parts of the meal.

    11. We do a big party a time or two a year, and try to do small dinner parties once a month, although of late we have been doing less than that for some reason. (We did one last weekend and it was clear we were out of practice!) Normally I just tell people to “bring a good attitude and a hearty appetite” but I think it’s fine to ask for a dessert or an app if they offer. And people always bring wine.

    12. 2x a month.

      And yes, absolutely I take people up on their offers- dessert, salad, appetizers and/or drinks are easy to outsource and if someone forgets or runs out of time, no harm.

    13. Sometimes I do like to control things and try and get people to not bring things that will not coordinate with my menu!!

      But as I’ve gotten older and happier about just gathering, I let people bring whatever they want and sometimes that means 2 salads or 2 potato dishes or whatever. That’s fine!

    14. About offers to bring something for the meal, after sad experience when “assigning” out particular dish or two to guests who ended up binging lack-luster efforts, I now ask those offering what they would like to bring, let them name a few dishes (presumably those they would be happy to prepare or buy and bring), and pick one out of the ones they specifically offer. That way, they don’t feel like I’ve assigned them homework! And yes, avoid guests bringing dishes that “just needs to be popped in the oven for 15-20 minutes” before serving, particularly at Thanksgiving, stove-top or microwave only!

  2. Beautiful dress. Not quite sure if I would wear it to the office, but it’s a great dinner and party dress.

        2. Kate Middleton wore a version of this from Sezane which I coveted a few years ago…and then when I tried it on myself realized that some things are reserved for the Princess of Wales and her ilk. Beautiful outfit but not for me.

        1. I think this makes it a contender for office holiday party, but I agree with other commenters that the ribbed fabric probably takes it out of the running. Fool me once.

    3. I like sweater dresses and wear them all through winter. But this looks more like the sort of thing I would wear to be comfy at brunch or on an airplane than to the office. Between the slim fit and ruffle and length, it’s kind of reading night gown-ish or something.

  3. Has anyone ever purchased shoes from Camperlab and can share your experience? I need a pair of simple black flats but have a lot of foot problems – bunions on both feet, wide toe box with narrow heel, heavy step so the sole can’t be too flat otherwise I get pain from walking on concrete, and my feet tend to sweat more in non-natural materials. The shoes would be used for daily city walking. I came across Camper lab and it looks promising, but I’ve never heard of them before. I’m specifically looking at the Casi Myra.

    1. I owned a Camper flat probably 30 years ago, from the “twins” series of shoes with slightly mismatched details. They were very comfortable. I am not sure how that translates to 2026 quality.

      1. I never owned those mismatched Camper shoes but always wanted them circa 2002. Thanks for taking me back!

    2. Is this for commuting? If so, actual sneakers seem like they would be your best bet, then change into office shoes once you arrive.

    3. I think the shoes you are looking at are actually just from the brand Camper (Camper Lab is a subbrand or something). Camper is a Spanish comfort brand, super comfortable if a little quirky. They also sometimes run a little small. I have flat leather boots that have lasted forever; also had some very comfortable sandals. If you like the look, I would definitely try them! (and the ones you mention look cute and on trend to me… I am now tempted myself!)

    4. I own a pair of combat-style boots form Camper and they are very comfy and I like them, but the loop on the back to pull them on broke pretty quickly, so I’m not sure I think the quality is worth the price.

    5. Not what you asked but a bunionectomy was life changing for me. The internet makes the recovery sound worse than it actually is. If you’re in daily pain no matter what shoes you wear I’d highly recommend surgery.

      1. What ultimately pushed me over into getting this surgery (on both feet, about a year apart) was when the podiatrist* told me about women who waited too long, and in their 80’s, too frail to have the surgery, had to cut a hole in their shoes in order to accommodate the bunion. Seriously, they were mainly wearing chuck converse because that was the easiest one to cut the hole in. Was discussing with a friend, who told me this happened to her grandmother. Did the surgery; glad I did. *No, I did not have the podiatrist do the surgery; I went to an ortho for that who did them all day, every day.

      2. Yes and

        I didn’t realize how much daily foot pain I had accepted as normal, until after my bunionectomy, when my pain level went down so much. It made a huge difference!!

    6. Camperlab is one of the brands of Camper, a Spanish shoe brand from Mallorca famous by its quality with edgy design. Pelotas is the most famous model.
      Yes, I have several pairs of Camper shoes, different models (city sneakers and sandals mainly), they are confy and last decades (yes decades). They are the ones I always put in my suitcase for travels.
      Depending of the model you choose it could has a lifetime warranty

    8. I have *very* similar feet and the Myra with the more square toe was amazing–but note, it does not come in half sizes and runs small. I am sometimes a 39 but more often a 40 and sized up to the 40. I wore those shoes out literally–got holes in the soles, because they were so amazing and easy-on. But they only lasted about a year total. I went to replace them and the newer version wasn’t quite the same. If you can, get the kind with the foldable back heel part, that version seems to be more comfortable and flattering.

  4. Recommendations for the best hotels in southern Kauai for families? I went there every other year or so as a child and know the area attractions a bit, but it’s been a long time and my parents always rented a condo. We’d prefer a hotel (with AC) with a nice set-up for two adults and one 18-month-old, including a good toddler-friendly pool. Ultra-lux not required but definitely needs to be clean!! Would love to be walking distance to a decent bodysurfing (i.e., has waves) beach, maybe Kiahuna, and to a beach in general so we don’t have to haul out the car for everything. We wouldn’t do the Grand Hyatt (despite it being beautiful) because Shipwreck Beach is too rough/can’t afford it. We’re looking to go in late spring/early summer, flying from SFO. Any and all recs appreciated, including for casual food.

    1. Maybe take a look at the Sheraton? You would still have to drive to Baby Beach, but could walk to Kiahuna.

    2. Kiahuna Plantation by Outrigger. I think they are technically owner rentals, but there is a centralized reservations system.

  5. My menopausal weight / size gain has been primarily in my stomach (stomach getting more squishy and protruding vs getting wider). Now that I’m back to the office, I have a gym AND instructions from my doctor to exercise daily because my A1C is high. Are there exercises that can help with my shape and vanity issues (or just focus on health and hope that the shape follows).

      1. Not from exercising, but working on the A1C can absolutely change weight distribution. But that’s going to be more of a diet issue.

    2. Whatever you like enough to actually want to do. Though it’s a plus if at least some of it is weight bearing (so not swimming or cycling) and you do both cardio and strength. But doing anything at all is the most important thing, and you can build from there.

    3. If you’ve never exercised regularly before, the first step is to figure out what kind of workouts you like so it is sustainable for the long term. I’m a “baby steps” kind of person so when I started working out, I started with doing it only 2-3 times a day so it wasn’t overwhelming.

      I like to work out in the privacy of my own home and I don’t want to have to think about coming up with a complicated workout routine. So that leaves me with doing exercise videos at home. Fitness Blender has been a favorite for years and I recently discovered Monika Fit on YouTube.

      At my age (48) I’ve been focusing a lot on strength training, stretching and mobility workouts. The scale hasn’t changed, but I do find myself feeling stronger and more flexible.

      1. I’ve exercised regularly in the past but not really since COVID. I used to like tennis but that got too complicated, schedule-wise. I can read in the recumbent bike but need to do more (and no abs involvement at all on that).

    4. You should check what types of exercise are most important for lowering A1C, but I think you need some strength training plus another activity like walking. That is also a good approach for overall weight loss. Personally I find it helpful to follow a balanced strength training program and then I just go for walks outside.

    5. My $.02 would be to focus on overall health and strength, and getting that A1C down, rather than focusing on your middle section. You are more likely to have success (and then keep going) if you dont’ set yourself up for frustration and disappointment if the stomach doesn’t shrink.

    6. As a life-long lover of cardio, in my middle age, I’ve become convinced that weight training is the key to a lot of things, including improving my shape. I would focus on 3-4 days per week of strength training and then add cardio as it makes sense. I do find that if I cycle very lightly after I do a hard leg workout that my legs recover faster – this is not to work up a sweat and burn calories, it’s just to shake out the legs.

      Also recommend Stacy Sims’ book Next Level. I got it at the library.

      1. I don’t know about the sims book but a full body weightlifting routine focused on progressive overload about three days ( two will work five is probably too much) a week plus getting in your steps in will get you very far in your health journey.
        Sprinkle in a day or two of sweaty cardio once a week and really that’s an incredibly healthy routine.

        I like weight lifting as a busy working mom because it’s pretty quick and doesn’t leave you sweaty. You don’t have to sit through a class on someone else’s pace and schedule. You don’t have to twist up like a pretzel or say ohmmmm or listen to pop music or New Age music or get reminded to smile or breathe. I do it at the gym and use dumbbells and machines and cables. Im not even venturing into the squat rack. I track my progress so I’m not guessing. It’s working. After 3-6 months I get bored and hire a trainer for a few session and get a new routine. Rinse and repeat for forever probably. I sleep like a baby and no longer suffer from knots in my neck and back.

        Generally in life I hate the trend towards making complicated things simple but I really think exercise is an exception. I honestly think my boring little weight and walk routine as long as I consistently improve works as well as whatever they do in the class at my gym where they hang from the ceiling.

    7. Livers take up space too. Working on A1C means working on visceral fat, so health and vanity will correlate here.

    8. For me, changing my eating / carb intake has been most important with menopause. I just can’t get away with things anymore. I shifted one thing at a time, trying to keep healthier snacks at home that have protein/good fats. And I cut out obvious things (alcohol…) and started working on the carbs. It is a mindset change to move from a carb with every meal to more vegetables with more rare or smaller amounts bread/pasta/rice as treats. Cutting down on the late night snacking is the hardest.

      But since bone density and balance/core strength become more and more important at this stage of life, I have been pretty pleased with how much starting yoga has helped me. It has the added benefit of helping my mood/mental health by teaching me better breathing/relaxation, and this helps my sleep, which was also thrashed once I hit perimenopause. Optimizing my sleep/mood has helped my weight change too.

      1. And yeah, you can’t really target the stomach the way you hoped. Definitely consider HRT if you haven’t already started, but the stomach is where our weight wants to go now. So by losing weight overall, you will have weight loss in the stomach.

  6. I’m deep in feelings about my job right now, and I’m not sure where to go from here.

    A few weeks ago, I interviewed for the team lead position but I didn’t get it. I have a lot of thoughts as to why, and I have shared those thoughts with the director of the department. (She consistently mistakes professionalism for a lack of passion.)

    Yesterday, I found out that I have topped out the salary cap for my position, so I’m not eligible for the market adjustment everyone else is getting. They are looking to see if there’s a way to increase the cap, but they aren’t hopeful.

    I’ve been shut out of leadership/management positions. I’m in a role that is highly paid for the sector of the organization I work in, so there’s not really a place to transfer to that could offer an opportunity for more money.

    I like the work I do, and I’m good at it. But I’m not feeling great about the job right now.

    1. What feedback have you gotten about why you’re not getting leadership roles? Can you work on that?

    2. If you’re hearing clearly that “passion” for the job/role/company is a barrier to advancing, and it sounds like you want to advance, are you and the director on the same page on what “passion” would like? Like is it that, she needs to hear you saying “I believe in XYZ mission” with more oomph, or eg. not complain about salaries and working conditions/she’s worried you wouldn’t own the message when communicating about these if you were in leadership, or is it the type of place where “passion = happily works 80 hour weeks”.

      You can decide for yourself whether you are willing and able to do whatever it is they need to see; but “passion” is so vague that I would focus first on understanding what’s really at play. (You mention you have a lot of thoughts on why you didn’t get the role and you shared them… did the director of the department share *her* thoughts as well?)

    4. Girl time to move on. You’ve gotten a clear message that progress won’t happen where you are.

      1. Maybe. But this issue could follow OP to the next company. A lot of people mistake professionalism for standoffness and disengagement. I wouldn’t necessarily just move on without correcting what’s happening here.

        1. Agree with this take, and would also take some time before acting too quickly on this. I remember feeling really stung when something didn’t go my way, and while this may be a “them” problem, it might also be a “you” problem (that would follow to the next role). Most likely, it is a bit of both. Take some time to let the sting lessen, then ask for – and fully receive, without defensivesness _ the feedback on why you didn’t get the role. I swallowed my pride and did this, and it literally changed my career, for the better.

        2. If a lot of people are “mistaking” it, then it is standoffishness and disengagement.

    5. I’m sorry, and I’m potentially in a similar boat (will find out in a few weeks). So I’ve had to think about this exact scenario, including the near-impossibility of moving to a different job and/or getting more money.

      I haven’t come up with great solutions, tbh. The only things that have come up is protecting my time — that is, if the company doesn’t want me to do leadership stuff, then I’m not going to continue doing the quasi-leadership stuff. Some people on this board are doing to over-react to my leaning out and claim that it’s grounds for demotion or firing, and that’s just not true in my field. But without the promise of money or responsibility, the other thing to consider is how you hold on to your time and energy.

    6. I feel like I have a vague sense of what you do after all these years, and if it’s still health system IT and you want to make more, why not work for a vendor? I have more thoughts on this so let me know if I’m in the right neighborhood with your skills!

      1. If you’re still in hospital IT, things throughout healthcare are a little grim right now. We did not get increases in my academic medical center this year – thanks Trump – and everyone in my network is looking at cost cutting. That doesn’t mean you don’t have any opportunities, just that it may take some time.

        First, think about whether you really want to move from being an individual contributor to management. In IT, there are also project management roles as opposed to people management, so think about what your best fit is. If you decide you do want to move into management, then your options are to change employers (maybe to a vendor as someone else noted), make a lateral move within your organization to a team more aligned with how you work, or ask your director for a development plan.

  7. My teen niece just posted a fall picture on IG. She is wearing jeans with what looks like a 4″ zipper. I don’t think they are anyone’s hand-me-downs, so maybe this is something new in stores that she bought. I feel like if the youth are doing it, it will make it more mainstream sooner or later. I get not wanting waistbands around your ribs, but I don’t want to go back to where shirts barely tuck in and I have to be fearful of my backsides spilling out when I sit down. I am too old for this. Time to hoard the normal pants?

    1. Y2K trends are back which includes ultra low rise, capris, Uggs, chokers etc. it’s certainly a look.

    2. No need to hoard anything, stores will always have what you want. You may just need to shop at different stores. My mom and grandma weren’t wearing low rise jeans back in 2000. :)

      1. This is not true. As someone who hates high rise pants, it has truly been impossible to find pants that don’t feel like they’re strangling me for the last few years. I’ve been living in old clothes and leggings, so I’m definitely here for the return of low rise and actually being able to buy new pants.

        2. I don’t wear high rise pants and have had no trouble. Perhaps we are shopping at different stores.

      2. I kind of agree but also disagree. I am shopping for pajama leggings right now. There are only straight or wide leg pajama bottoms available.
        I am settling for Uniqlo Heattech but they aren’t my favorite option. Stores were packed with cotton-blend or otherwise pj bottom/non-workout leggings options a few years ago. Now it’s a desert.

    3. Yes, hoard, the low rise years were dreadful and I was buying dead stock off eBay to survive them.

    4. I just bought my first pair of wide wide leg jeans from KUT and love them so much. They will be the first pair I pull out of the closet now so I hope they stay in a style longer. So much more flattering on me than skinny or flares.

  8. Help, I got a new pair of Chelsea lug tread boots I love but they squeak horribly when I walk! It’s not the sole, it sounds like it’s coming from inside the boot when my foot rubs against it as I walk. Any ideas to make it shop? Walking around the office today is so embarrassing. Maybe I need different socks.

    1. If you are wearing socks and it is still squeaking, you could try corn starch in the boot.

      My experience, though, is that shoes that have an internal squeak like this aren’t really fixable because it is the different layers of the shoe material rubbing against themselves and they wear out more quickly because those layers are not secured together. I find they need to be banished to the return or donate pile for my own sanity.

    2. Do you have hand lotion in your purse? Rub it all over the inside of the squeaky shoe.

  9. I am in perimenopause and have started having small urine leakage that kegels and the weights aren’t stopping. I know this is common, but does anyone have common-sense recommendations for things that worked for you before my next OB appointment?

    1. I think the answer is pelvic floor PT. There is more to it than kegels. But I don’t know what all that is because I haven’t done it.

    2. You can ask for a referral to pelvic pt and/or do an online program. A lot things can factor into it, like muscle tightness, weakness, strength of muscles that attach to your pelvic floor, hip rotation, posture, constipation, breathing, etc.

      You should also look at your v – does it look the same, do you have dryness, has anything starting with a c gotten smaller? If so, ask for estrogen cream. You could also ask about hormonal birth control and/or HRT. You may have genitourinary syndrome of menopause.

    3. Yoga. There is also an on-line program called Restore Your Core that is said to be quite effective.

      Kegels won’t fix it. You need to strengthen all the core muscles.

    4. You should see a urogynecologist for an evaluation rather than just waiting for the OB. Depending on what the cause of the leakage is — e.g. stress incontinence vs urge incontinence — the treatment options vary.

    5. Go see your OB. The meds helps. So do my bladder pads as I call them. I did the kegels!

    6. I agree you should see a urogynecologist. So when you see your OB get a referral. And I agree with asking your OB about estrogen cream, as the previous poster mentioned. Our doctors don’t teach us about how important HRT and topical estrogen is for symptoms like urinary urgency/frequency, night time urge, increased UTIs as well as vaginal dryness and decreased s3xual responsiveness

      And I strongly recommend moving from an OB (that helped you through pregnancies?) to a GYN that specializes in perimenopause/menopause.

    7. This is something a localized estrogen in the vagina helps with. Not just the cream but also things like Imvexxy. Systemic HRT doesn’t necessarily help with that.

  10. Are body suits in fashion this season? Like a square neck body suit with wide leg jeans? I’ve recently discovered square necks can look good on me, but I need a slim fitting top when I wear wide leg jeans so that I don’t look like a head-to-toe sack.

    2. I think if you feel like something looks good on you, that’s more important than whether it’s in fashion or not.

    3. I think basic body suits are a staple – that’s their purpose – to be worn when you need a slim fitting top.

    4. Yes, and I love them! They balance out wide and barrel-legged jeans nicely (at least for me, a petite pear).

  11. Anyone here drive a Rivian? Specifically looking for experience with the R1S. I currently drive a Mazda CX 90 EV, which is a plug-in hybrid, and I would love to go all electric. We have three kids, so I need a family hauler, and my best shot at seven seats is either the R1S or Kia E9. I’ve test driven the Rivian and like it, but it’s spendy and the Internet is completely at odds with itself: some people love it, some people say it’s not worth the money and they’ve had nothing but issues. If I could wait three years, I think I’d have a lot more options open to me, but unfortunately, they’re just aren’t that many 7 seat electric vehicles out on the market.

    I’d love to hear from anyone who owns one of these: how do you like it, which model year and type you have, and anything else you would want to pass along. The other issue I have with the Rivian is that it seems like you’re paying a premium for off-road capability and speed, neither of which I’m necessarily going to use. I need a big car to haul kids and sports gear around, make trips to Costco, get our dogs to the vet, etc. We live in an exurb, no public transportation available and my community is not walkable. I plan on buying not leasing because I drive too many miles for a lease (learned this the hard way) and I do appreciate the ability to drive my cars into the ground.

    1. I have a neighbor with 3 kids who has one. And someone in my parking garage has one. The consensus among the 3 drivers of said vehicles is that they are long and very heavy and hard to turn if the radius is tight. Maybe not unlike a Suburban? IDK — have never had or driven anything that big. I have a hybrid CRV and love it, especially the size and turning radius (vs a minivan, which I also have) in a city parking garage. I would have loved to have gotten the Sienna (also Hybrid) but you cannot get the new higher trim levels in my city for love or money, so I couldn’t even test one. FWIW, I have a FWD Odyssey and have taken it offroad camping in the mountains enough to think that all car packages sold to surbanites are adequate in much of the US and if you are a true off-roader, you know who you are and have something like a Toyota Tacoma and a Polaris.

    2. No experience with the Rivian specifically, but I love my electric car for ferrying my kids around. Being able to keep climate control on without burning gas/generating fumes is awesome.

      1. yes! I read in my electric car last night while kiddo was at sports practice. love those seat warmers and would never do this in an idling gas car.

    3. We have the RS1. Replaced a Tesla with it last spring.
      I like it. I wouldn’t say I love it, but I probably have never loved an automobile. It’s my partner’s daily vehicle, and I prefer my smaller plug-in hybrid SUV for daily (city) driving because I find the Rivian large. But if you are accustomed to bigger vehicles, or navigating wider streets and parking spots than I confront in a denser urban environment, that might not be an issue for you.

      1. Thank you! Has it been a reliable vehicle for you? One of my concerns is that some owners report lots of issues (ex: software bugs, rattles while driving).

        1. I have never dealt with any of that, or with anything Bowl mentions below. It doesn’t have AirPlay, but I don’t miss it because the system it has works for me. Same with the nav. I have found the AC more than adequate for Atlanta, but haven’t been through a winter with it, so don’t know if that will change my view. Also, we seldom drive long distances, live in-town in a major metro where chargers are plentiful, and have a charger at home, so range isn’t an issue for us.
          YMMV, literally.

    4. Owned a Rivian R1S and emphatically would not recommend it.
      – Very difficult to get service if you have any issues
      – Doesn’t have Apple CarPlay, and the nav stinks
      – The climate control doesn’t work well in heat
      – The battery doesn’t work well in freezing cold
      – EVs are generally a bad choice for someone who drives a ton of miles, the range anxiety is a huge problem

      For the cost of a Rivian, you can get a much nicer and more reliable ICE vehicle and still save more than enough to make up the difference in the cost of gas. EVs aren’t saving the planet, so leave your guilt at the door and do what works best for you and your family. :)

    5. If you do get one, be aware when you see signs about weight restrictions in places like parking decks.

    6. Have you considered the electric Volvo XC-90? Perfect car for kids + dogs. Safe and reliable.

    7. A bit late to reply, but we have an EV9 for all the reasons you mentioned and we love it! We had a smaller SUV before so the larger size was a bit of an adjustment at the beginning but totally fine. There is tons of storage if you fold the third row down and the range is great for an EV

  12. This weekend I saw a woman wearing the most amazing casual skirt, and I’m kicking myself for not asking her where she got it. Has anyone out there seen a wide wale corduroy pencil skirt in a deep wine/purple color? Trouserish details, a little below knee length. I would wear the hell out of that skirt!

      1. I don’t think that’s the one, but it’s really close. The one I saw was shorter and purpler, but the shape on this one is good! Thank you!

      1. That’s super cute! The one I saw was shorter and straighter, less a-line. But I like this one a lot! Thank you.

  13. I’m a regulatory lawyer for the federal government and am considering pivoting out of law. Are there other careers where you can make around $200k in a hcol city that don’t require significant retraining? Something like real estate agent comes to mind, but I know that’s not reliably a good income. I know this is probably an unrealistic hope but I need to at least think about an escape.

    1. It’s a very bad time to get into this industry but policy research would work. You might come in below $200k at first.

      1. Hahahahahahaha. I am a policy researcher. You might get to $200K with 20 years’ experience and a PhD in economics.

        1. She isn’t entry-level. We have and know a lot of employees who are at or close to that. I know everyone’s rates from budgeting for proposals.

          2. I also know all the rates from the proposals and I call BS. At the large policy shop I came from, only the c-suite made $200K+.

          3. She’s not making that as a career switcher unless she has very good name recognition in the field.

      2. You can only make over 200k if you’re willing to do morally dubious policy research.

      3. Curious about policy research. I was so naive as a kid that I never figured out what think tanks were. Could you explain this to me like I am 5? I work in Big Law / Tax & Finance and have done some lobbying write-ups and agency administrative work. Is this a possible pivot? Or not really?

        1. There are two kinds of policy “research”: the real kind, which includes a lot of program evaluation but also some RCTs and requires genuine skills that are best learned in a social science PhD program, and the fake kind, which consists mostly of hosting “convenings” and providing “technical assistance” and is often done by lawyers who don’t want to lawyer anymore. Both kinds have been heavily impacted by federal funding cuts.

    2. Are you me?! I’ve been researching this question and reddit’s conclusion seems to be that anything in waste management is surprisingly well-paid. Sigh. That’s not quite what I had in mind. Best of luck to you–this is a tough time.

    3. Can you come in-house? We’d jump at the chance to hire someone with your background at the relevant agency for my field.

    4. Insurance? There’s office of general counsel but a legal background also can also translate to claims handling and risk management especially if you get into specialized areas of insurance, think E&O, marine, etc. There’s big $ to be made in insurance if you are willing to do the corporate dance.

  14. Hi guys. Can you give me your best tips for job applications right now? My company was bought by private equity and folks are being let go right and left, and I fear I won’t make it past the new year once my current project ends. I’ve been using chat to suggest “skills” to stuff into the resume. Any other tips? Is it OK to change job titles slightly to be more keyword-centric? For example, I had a position in product development, which is what would likely track by those terms in an ATS but my formal title was product innovation–that sort of thing. What are you doing these days to get seen by an actual human?

    1. Definitely align your resume with keywords that are in the job posting. It may help to run it through AI, asking it to help you tweak your resume to fit the job posting and optimize it for ATS. If you are part of any organization that allows job postings (like an industry women’s group) or know anyone at the companies you’re applying for, ask them to submit your resume to get to the top of the recruiter’s list.

    2. I would prioritize networking and connections as much as possible. If you’ve worked with a recruiter in the past or have access to one, use them.

      If using ChatGPT be careful and make sure that you edit it enough afterwards so that it does not read like every other resume. As a hiring manager its frustrating to get a lot of resumes that sound very similar and as a result don’t seem to have much substance.

    3. Cosigning your question on title smoothing. I get a lot of “don’t make up a cutesy title for yourself” advice; but unfortunately my real title sounds like a smashup of a few known titles in my industry…because my role was a smashup. I can put the right keywords in my resume for each different type of job; but I’m struggling with whether to change my linkedin.

    4. General tips- reach out to your network and let them know you are looking. I’ve been in companies bought/sold by PE many times and everyone knows how it goes and wants to help. When people leave your current firm, reach out and stay in touch!!

    5. On your title question, I say use your real title and put product development in your bullets. A lot of HR departments use surveys for reference checks that include title, so if your reference uses something different than what you did, that could raise a red flag.

      To get in front of an actual human, use your network as much as possible. Chat up people you used to work with, mentors, even friends in other industries. Don’t be shy about saying you’re looking for something new. Most people actually like helping other people. And getting your resume to a hiring manager outside of the talent management system is priceless.

      Good luck!

  15. Are there any fields so sexist that you wouldn’t go into them (or advise nieces to avoid)? Science and academic jobs seem to get such a bad rap here. I had thought that quantifiable jobs let you succeed regardless of race or gender or background, but it seems not to be the case. I work in finance and while the reputation is bad and the hours are not family friendly, it has worked out well for me and the pay is good. If you had to pick anew, what field would you pick and why?

    1. Science is too broad. Certain areas can be old boys clubs by my DH is a biologist and the majority of scientists he works with are women. Biology is a lot more female friendly than chemistry or physics. Biggest issue is pushing students to do their Phd so they don’t finish at masters level and get pigeonholed into lab tech or manager level jobs.

      1. +1 – physics is a hardcore boys club, and more so the more specialized you are. Biology and chemistry are vastly different environments.

    2. I’m a woman in construction from a bluecollar background and I have not had any sexim problem in my whole career. Is it a tought enviroment? yes, it is, but both for women and men. I would go in engineering again wihtout a doubt.

      1. I am in industrial manufacturing and oddly I have found blue collar men (and blue collar ‘adjacent’ men) to be far less sexist than white collar men. They seem to value hard work and grit more, and these characteristics are not exclusive to one gender, so it can work out better for women.

    3. Enlisted military in this current administration. The bit of progress that’s happened over the last 20 or so years is being undone. It’s a shame, too because enlisted service was a viable path for poor kids trying to escape crappy situations.

    4. Industries that focus on what you know instead of who you know seem to be more meritorious and more friendly to women. It’s why medicine, accounting, and other industries with exams seem easier to break into. Conversely, I would never go into sales.

    5. mmm I am in tech, and would not advice avoiding “science and academic” jobs as a whole – that’s a huge chunk! In my experience, there are certain companies worth avoiding, or at least knowing what you’re walking into, but I wouldn’t rule out a whole field

      But if I were going to rule out a whole field…oil & gas is closer to a 1980’s culture than anything else

      For what it’s worth, I am not sure there is ANY job that is “quantifiable”/success measured on purely objective measures, once you get to senior levels, even in very quant-ey fields.

      1. I work in tech and agree with this. Many tech companies are great for women. There are always going to be sexist individuals but those people tend to suck overall- it’s not just women who dislike them.

    6. I would worry more about AI than bros. So many office and information-based jobs are dying. I would steer them to healthcare. Hands on element, growing demand, and variety of ways to go depending on interests and aptitude.

    7. I’ve worked in finance, politics, and computer science. There was sexism in each, but never so much that I felt hampered by it. I would not make career decisions based on that.

    8. It is all very company specific. I would say that I’ve experienced a whole lot less s*xism working with construction, manufacturing and oil & gas companies than more stereotypically white collar knowledge skills companies.

    9. I largely believe our mothers and grandmothers did the hard work in this area for us. I think if someone experiences sexism today, it’s because of an individual, not an institution.

      1. Agree, I think the world has largely changed. Of course there is still a lot of room to improve, but its not Mad Men

        2. I’m willing to be proven wrong, but I’m 34, and *most* of the workplace sexism I encounter is stuff like – people assuming I’m an intern, or having a suggestion “suddenly get heard” when a man in the meeting repeats it, or being cautioned about sounding “abrasive” for words & tone I’m 100% sure would be “authoritative” coming from a man.

          I’ve only encountered the really, really blatant stuff – like “sure makes meeting’s nicer seeing your face, if your team keeps hiring young ladies like you we’re going to have to start calling you all “Charlie’s Angels” at one, particularly terrible, company. When I talk to women my mom’s generation and older; that kind of experience was pretty universal and expected for them. Their generation shared tips on things like pivoting in the hallway so the creepy guy can’t brush against your bottom; mine shares tips like speaking slow and deep to project competence. It feels like things must be a lot better; without that meaning ‘sexism isn’t a problem anymore’.

          1. I’m 32 in my employment history I’ve had a boss exclusively call me ‘darling’, I’ve been cornered and groped while crying, and la pièce de résistance my boss r@ped me.

          2. Don’t kid yourself that the first kind isn’t harmful. The blatant stuff is annoying, but easier to fight because it’s out in the open. The subtle stuff is much harder to overcome.

          3. @2:17 — that’s really, really horrible and I’m sorry that happened to you. You deserve a safer workplace, and I very much hope you are in one now.

          5. Because she isn’t wrong. You had an extremely unusual and awful experience, but it is not typical at all in 2025 in the US.

      3. Oh, oh no honey. This is a very privileged take that is not at all based in reality.

        1. List the data that shows things haven’t improved since the 1950s-1980s, please.

          1. No, you are the one making baseless claims that this is generations behind us and therefore you get to bear the burden of proof.

      6. Institutions are made up of individuals. Those individuals at the top set the tone, and if they’re sexist, then guess what?

      7. Agree. I also think some women go out of their way to label things sexism that are just people not liking the work they produce or asking them to do junior level work because they are the juniormost person in the room.

    11. Based on the experience of a friend’s 28-year-old daughter, structural engineering. She was very much viewed as a token hire and made to feel it at two separate companies.

    12. The term “science” covers a lot of fields. Some are more sexist than others. I have personally observed that the fields of genetic epidemiology and cancer epidemiology seem to be majority women. A lot of the sociological and psychological sciences lean heavily women, too.

      But just because a field has more women doesn’t mean it will be devoid of sexism. In my science career, the men I worked with were more supportive and better about advancing my career than the women I worked with. One woman who ran a lab at my graduate school with was flat out sexist, to the point of paying her male postdocs more than she paid female postdocs with equal or more skills, because they “had a family.”

    13. Not that many people on here would be going into that field, but a good friend of mine was selling cars for a while (I bought two Audis from her) and it was horribly sexist and she got out for that reason. She’s selling mortgages now and likes it much better.

    14. I work in finance because the STEM field I went to school for was awash in actual abuse. The industry was so niche, small, and ultra-competitive that as a woman in the field it was expected that I would be willing to sleep my way to grant money. That industry has had a few high profile news articles that have called attention to the issue since then, but it is still a very real problem. The pay has always been peanuts, too.

    15. Computers is actually a lot more open to women than you would expect, there’s just pockets of weirdos and I imagine that’s the same for academia and other sciences.

    16. No, because I am capable of leaving a situation if I don’t like it. Ruling out an entire industry on the fear that I might run into some problem just harms me. I have more faith in my ability to pivot than that.

      1. Well, some industries are so small and niche that you actually do have to walk away if you want to escape the problems. When there are only double-digits of people in the field and they are all part of the problem, you can’t exactly just jump to a different lab.

        1. Yes, I am confident in my ability to pivot out of my niche industry if I have to. I was smart enough to get into it; I’m smart enough to get out of it. I doubt you’re a one trick pony, either.

          2. You are offended by me saying that you’re also smart enough to pivot out of the niche you’re in? I can’t tell if you have thin skin or a thick skull, because that wasn’t an insult (although this is!).

          3. The fact that your niche industry apparently did have a safe place for you to pivot to means you don’t know how ignorant you are. Not that you somehow win by operating that ignorance as though it is a holier-than-thou prize.

          4. I’m not part of this discussion and am floored by the rudeness. Stop blaming the victim. Being stuck in a bad situation has very little to do with smarts sometimes you sweet summer child. May you never be on the receiving end of a situation where you did everything right but still end up in an awful situation and without the right alignment of opportunities or resources to not lose it all or most of it all trying to escape. Niche fields wrap your entire network in ways you can only imagine.

    17. Absolutely not. All those fields pay better and why would I advise my nieces to limit their earning potential. I’m old enough ti have experienced actual sexism and the world has changed. Not completely but it’s a ridiculous and counterproductive take to eliminate entire professions.

      1. While I appreciate your sentiment, we need to be honest with the next generation about the actual earning potential in certain industries. Research scientists in niche areas are often fighting tooth and nail for every penny of funding, and many of them depend on having a multi-income household in order to keep doing what they are doing. It’s a disservice to girls if we push them to fields that not only have no realistic financial reward but also makes them fodder for the old boys club.

  16. Thinking of buying this skirt, but would like it several inches shorter. I am concerned, however, that either the material or the cut make shortening it problematic. I am saying this as a complete non-sewer and hoping someone with more knowledge than I have can weigh in.

    https://www.nordstrom.com/s/satin-maxi-skirt/8217625?color=BROWN+SEAL&size=medium&utm_medium=cpc&utm_content=pmax_womanapparel_asset_group&utm_term=pmax_womanapparel_listing_group&utm_channel=low_nd_shopping_pmax&adpos=&creative=&device=c&matchtype=&network=x&acctid=21700000001689570&dskeywordid=&lid=58700008804472611&dsproductgroupid=&product_id=A6814921&merchid=1243147&prodctry=US&prodlang=en&channel=online&storeid=&locationid=9051518&targetid=&campaignid=21864773245&adgroupid=&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=4&gad_campaignid=21854357736&gbraid=0AAAAAD8eAEkSfUEMcvMpOEZee20m_rLri&gclid=Cj0KCQjw9obIBhCAARIsAGHm1mRO7LfCYz6PsWLDqOogLNkeeaBDedz9EQGp2rDZu7UTeGvLkYeUdcEaAtpMEALw_wcB

    1. You just need someone who understands how to work with bias cut in satin (i.e., they need to let it hang after cutting since bias areas of the fabric will stretch differently) and they need to check that the hem is even all around on your actual body.

    2. Yep, that would be easy to hem (but not very easy since bias cut + slippery fabrics add a bit of difficulty). Any tailor should be able to do so.

    4. As an alternative, consider the satin skirt at Old Navy that is billed as midi but comes in regular, petite and tall so you should be able to get a length that is good for you.

  17. Dear director of volunteer activity: When you post the markings on the website on Tuesday afternoon and do not hand out the papers onto which the markings are to be copied until Tuesday night, please do not criticize your volunteers for not having the markings on their papers that same Tuesday night. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

    Signed, an adult with a day job who does not own a time machine

    1. Amen. I’m at the point where I really, really don’t feel any guilt in leaving a volunteer activity or organization if I’m getting scolded or condescended to by bad leadership.

  18. while it is nice to feel included, the number of retailers who fail every year with their Hanukkah decor is a bit ridiculous in this day and age.

    1. Not Jewish, but I noticed a couple nights ago that TJ Maxx had like A table runner and A dog toy. Come on!

      1. i’ve seen what OP means…wrong letters on the dreidel, or backwards letters, or made up letters, wrong number of candles, etc. or things with apples and honey or challah, which have absolutely nothing to do with the holiday

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