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5/24/24 Update: The Nordstrom Half-Yearly Sale has started — see our big sale roundup! Also, sign up for our newsletter to stay on top of all the great sales!
The below content is about the 2018 Nordstrom Half-Yearly Sale.
Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
This Michael Kors sheath dress looks lovely. I love the structure to it, including what's sort of like a shaped dart throughout the front. The dress seems interesting but polished and professional, and a stretch wool dress should be comfortable while also being durable.
It's available in sizes 4–14 and is $1,995 at Nordstrom. Stretch Wool Sheath Dress
A more affordable option is from New York & Company — we featured it recently. For plus sizes, there's an alternative from Nipon Boutique.
Seen a great piece you’d like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com.
Sales of note for 10.10.24
- Nordstrom – Extra 25% off clearance (through 10/14); there's a lot from reader favorites like Boss, FARM Rio, Marc Fisher LTD, AGL, and more. Plus: free 2-day shipping, and cardmembers earn 6x points per dollar (3X the points on beauty).
- Ann Taylor – Extra 50% off sale (ends 10/12)
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything plus extra 25% off your $125+ purchase
- Boden – 10% off new styles with code; free shipping over $75
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off a lot of sale items, with code
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide
- J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site, plus extra 25% off orders $150+
- Lo & Sons – Fall Sale, up to 35% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – Sale on sale, up to 85% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 50% off 2+ markdowns
- Target – Circle week, deals on 1000s of items
- White House Black Market – Buy one, get one – 50% off full price styles
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Ellen
Yay! Pricey Monday’s! I love Pricey Monday’s and Michael Kors’ clotheing! I was at Nordstrom over the weekend but did NOT see this dress. I wonder if the manageing partner will approve it? I worry a little b/c it is wool, and sometimes the wool gets a little itchey, even if it is fully lined. It is NOT ladylike for us to be scratcheing, and we can NOT just claim it is wool b/c it does NOT look good for us to be scratcheing! FOOEY!
April Fools!
It turns out that my scale is reading about 10 pounds too light.
OTOH, at least now I know that my weight isn’t shifting south at an alarming rate. Makes total sense now why my pants aren’t fitting.
Ellen
I found out I gained over 5 pounds last week, and I do NOT even remember eating anything terrible. FOOEY! I must continue to walk but mabye do MORE. Dad is mad b/c he saw me eateing alot of Matzos this weekend, but what was I suposed to do? It is passover, so I can NOT eat cookies. DOUBEL FOOEY!
BTW, I just learned that Lord & Taylor had a big data breach. The article says that Hudson Bay’s, the Canada-based parent company of the two chains, could not confirm that all U.S. and Canadian outlets were affected but said its e-commerce sites were not breached. The company said it’s investigating and taking steps to contain the attack. It said customers won’t be liable for fraudulent charges and will be offered free identity protection services.
I am worried b/c they have all of my credit cards, and my mom’s and also including the law firm’s corporate card. I have to tell the manageing partner today. TRIPEL FOOEY!
Anonymous
Oh man. That stinks. At least you know where you stand.
Anonymous
That does stink.
I have rapidly gained about 10 lbs this month from stress eating.
Yesterday I looked in the mirror, and with that additional weight, I realized I have become my mother….
Anon
I have no idea why my home scale is at least 4 lbs lighter than the doc’s scale.
At my age, I am scared to lose weight, because that always makes people look older. It’s like you look like a hag, or a haggard potato. Your choice. Not if you have an excellent bone structure, I suppose.
Baconpancakes
Hope everyone’s weekend/Passover/Easter was great!
My MM LaFleur box came over the weekend, and everything seems weirdly dark and autumnal. Dark purple, maroon, black – anyone else confused by the current offerings? That said, everything is fitting better! I’m going to put off buying pricey for a couple months in hopes that I need smaller sizes soon!
Anonymous
Maybe the brighter and lighter colors sold out quickly? I got three tops a month ago in brighter colors.
Aggie
Agreed, the new bright colors came out a little over a month ago. My box had robin’s egg blue, a mauve gray that looks almost lavender and the new brick red (not for me but YMMV). According to my stylist at the Houston trunk show, they are getting ready for a new summer collection with new colors.
Baconpancakes
Huh, weird. Maybe because I’m on a 3-month rotation they pack the box 3 month ahead of time? I’m very interested in the mauve gray – which item was it in?
Aggie
I bought it in the Catherine Dress but it also comes in the Catherine.
Aggie
I bought it in the Catherine Dress but it also comes in the Beverly.
4 months pregnant
I am pregnant with my second and preparing to deliver at the same hospital (GW, for anyone in DC). I received a weird bill from the OB’s office, not the normal billing department, with handwritten amounts telling me due to my insurance requirements of 15% copayment, I owe X amount of money by my 6 months pregnancy. It does not tell me what this amount is based on, how they arrived at it, or what it is for- according to my friends they were asked to prepay for delivery, so I’m guessing that’s what it is? However, I pay all of my health bills out of my FSA, which requires receipts and explanation of benefits, none of which I would have for this amount since the services haven’t actually happened. and this weird handwritten bill certainly wouldn’t cut it. Anyone else experienced this? Seems like I can’t actually be required to do it. And how would it work with my FSA?
Jen
call them and get the scoop and ask your FSA question. You will not be the first to ask.
Worst case scenario they can probably issue you a receipt after you deliver and you can reimburse yourself with FSA funds.
Anonymous
I’d call the doctor’s office and ask.
Anonymous
Ask for an itemized bill from the billing department.
Anonymous
That sounds really bizarre to me. Also I delivered at GW last year (I mean I guess things could’ve changed) and definitely did not have to pre-pay for my delivery. I DID have to call billing because they billed my directly for OB services (about $5,000) and didn’t submit to my insurance, but once it was submitted it went through fine.
Anonymous
It is becoming more and more common, unfortunately, for some (often high cost…) clinics to ask you to pay out of pocket before you have your services. I strongly dislike this, especially when your course of care is unclear, and because so many mistakes are made by billing offices and insurance companies and fighting to get reimbursed is never fun.
I was recently asked to pay out of pocket the entire cost before getting my mammogram. Then errors were made and I struggled for months to correct them to get reimbursed. That’s what I get for my $600 a month Obamacare insurance….
When you will be getting a course of care that has a typical trajectory, they are asking for these payments ahead too. Messy.
A colleague was recently asked to pay a retainer of $100,000 for her 18 year old daughter to continue treatment for early breast cancer at the cancer clinic. This amounted to extortion in my book and is awful. The clinic had already seen her for weeks, had made the diagnosis and started treatment. She had insurance, but the clinic was out of network so the co-pays were higher. This was at a major academic hospital in Chicago. Shameful.
insurance
Yes, I was asked to pay my portion in advance for a scheduled 2-night EEG for my son, which ended after 1 night because the neurologists got the info they needed quicker than they expected. It took several calls to get a refund check from NYU, but I did get it.
4 months pregnant
This was my first reaction to receiving it as well- I have always been on time with my bill payments, my insurance covers a lot, why should I have to pay in advance? Errors are likely and the last thing I need on maternity leave is dealing with my insurance, my FSA, and the billing department to try to make sure everyone is paid and reimbursed correctly. I think I will try to slow-roll this until the birth by which time it will be moot.
Anonymous
Yes – unfortunately I STILL had to deal with short-term disability processing errors, billing errors, etc… while on maternity leave. I probably had to call someone once a day for 2-3 weeks. it was stressful!
Anonymous
My OB wanted to pre-bill me too and I explained all the same points you have. I sent them a copy of my HSA statement showing that I have $12,000 in my HSA account. I included a letter stating that my OOP max was $3,000 and that I was more than happy to pay them the OOP max when the billing had properly gone through insurance. No one is going to move quickly to fix a billing error if they’ve already received payment…
They were more than happy to waive the upfront fee. I think they just want to ensure they’ll be paid in the end…
Anonymous
Nicely done.
DCJ
Hi- I have delivered twice at GW and been with MFA for almost a decade. I have never, ever seen anything handwritten on a bill. Call the billing office. They are actually surprisingly helpful and will work with you and insurance to resolve issues. This seems really weird.
DCJ
Also, have never been asked to prepay anything with MFA/GW.
Anon
Sure you can be required to do it. What’s stopping them? Also, why haven’t you just picked up the phone and asked them yet?
Anon
Someone’s cranky today. Geez.
Anonymous
I hope your day ends on a more positive note.
Anonymous
Haven’t told anyone IRL but I paid off my student loans last week kind of on a whim. Had been sitting on the cash and loans at under 3%. I’ve always been big on the idea that there’s no reason to pre pay if you can make more in the market than you owe in interest. Well sub 1% in the market for the quarter so figured it was time to pony up. Feels so weird. Feels good to think about monthly bills going down by $700 though!
Anonymous
Congrats!
Anon
Congrats, but why are you getting sub-1% in the market? You can get more than that in an Ally savings account and several others, I believe. Either way, there is a lot of satisfaction in paying off loans, so yay!
Cookie
Congrats! I hope you treat yourself a little. You deserve it!
Jo March
Congratulations!!
Anonymous
I’ve noticed that lately my hands are a tiny bit swollen when I first wake up in the morning – enough that rings I usually wear on my middle finger won’t slide on comfortably. I’m back to normal by the time I get to work. This seems to happen even if I don’t drink alcohol the day before. I’m mid-30s and never had any problems with my blood pressure. Is this something to be concerned about or is it just age?
Anonymous
I think it’s worth bringing up with your doctor. Are you due for a physical? Have you had one recently?
Anonymous
While you wait on a doctor’s appt, is it possible you’re getting dehydrated overnight? My fingers swell when I’m light on hydration.
OP
This is a good thought. Could be. I drink a glass of water as soon as I get up, so if dehydration is the problem then that would explain why I’m fine ~an hour later.
Anonymous
Actually, it is probably the opposite! When you are retaining water (eg. more salt in diet, or just changes in your body with age/hormonal changes), it is not uncommon for your hands to swell in the night.
Mine also swell in the night which is a combination of mild arthritis (inherited) and the aging/salt sensitivity issue.
Sometimes the way you sleep is a contributor to hand swelling. How do you sleep? Where are your hands.
But still drink that glass of water in the morning. Most of us are dehydrated by morning, and if you only drink coffee in the morning you are dehydrating yourself even more. We feel worse/tired/easier to get headaches when we are dehydrated.
Anonymous
Your body retains water when you get dehydrated. So we are both speaking to the same phenomenon from different sides.
anon a mouse
This happens to me on occasion, and I finally figured out that it was when I ate a particularly saltier-than-usual dinner the night before.
KateMiddletown
Could also have to do with body temp or lack of movement during sleep. My fingers swell at different points throughout the day depending on how warm I am, what I’m working on, if I exercise… the list goes on.
Mrs. Jones
FWIW this happens to me too.
Anonymous
When I got my engagement ring at age 25 the salesman asked me if my hands swelled in the morning. I guess I looked surprised because he said “of course not, you are too young”. Now that I am 40 guess what? They swell in the morning. I think it’s normal.
Anon
Do you stop eating dinner three hours before bed? Are you drinking enough water? Carb loading at dinner? You are not supposed to have a lot of starch and grains at night to lower cortisol. If you are doing all of those things and still have a problem, it is a food intolerance or estrogen dominance.
Anonymous
I ma sorry, but must point put this is not true, re: carbohydrates, not eating within 3 hours of bed, and lowering cortisol in this way.
Please do not believe these types of (extreme) things about carbohydrates and food in general.
To the OP, this happens to me cyclically, so it could be period-related, and also if I eat out and eat something I usually wouldn’t. It’s almost certainly just plain old water retention. Goes away soon after waking up and becoming active. i think it’s just normal. (If you watched Will and Grace, there’s a joke in one of the episodes about scheduling a TV appearance in the afternoon, after the “morning bloat” is over. Heh.)
Anon
Have you actually tried not eating 3 hours before bed? It certainly does reduce inflammation.
If you are having any sort of period-related “issues” I don’t think you should judge strategies that come from people who have reduced or eliminated these issues.
Also, when I say not to eat a ton of starch or grains before bed, I am not saying to go on some strict no carb diet. I said watch them before bed. NBD.
Neef
I’m a graduate student who is participating in her internship year (unpaid) which is required in order to work in my state. Although I work an exhausting part time job at night in order to pay most of my bills, my family offered to take on a significant chunk of my household bills, to the tune of $600/month. My family is not rich but they continue to insist on helping me. I would like to buy thank you gifts for my mother and two sisters when I graduate in May in order to express my gratitude for their support. I am looking for ideas from the group. Obviously, I know the best gift is repayment in full but that can’t happen until I situate myself financially which may be another year from now. Does anyone have any suggestions?
Anonymous
What about a spa day or tickets to an event for you all to do together?
Neef
Thanks! Simple and perfect.
AIMS
A small token and a sincere note. If I was giving someone financial support or even if I just knew that you are trying save money, the last thing I’d want is for you to spend money on a gift for me. I’d stick to a small potted plant or something they could plant, if they’re into that, or maybe a little framed print from Etsy or a nice framed photo of you together.
Anonymous
Ditto.
Anon
+1. I would invite them over for a nice homemade dinner and dessert and make a toast to thank them. A spa day for four sounds really expensive.
Anonymous
Totally agree.
I spa have never had a spa day because of the cost. So if my daughter slurred MY had earned money on us going to the spa, I would be pretty upset….
Anonymous
Yikes typos!
Anonymous
Agree. I also have never had a spa day; it’s a luxury that doesn’t fit into my lifestyle. So I’d far prefer that someone I was helping to support financially not splurge on me that way. A really heart-felt card, inviting me to lunch or dinner, a part in the celebration of the achievement — that’s what I’d want.
Senior Attorney
Yep. Definitely agree with all this.
Anonymous
+1
Thoughtfulness over cost. Is there something you bake/cook/knit that they love? Or a plant they might like? I’ve been talking about getting an aloe plant forever but never find the time to go to the shop. Would prefer that over a spa day if I had lent someone money.
Fishie
I would not recommend buying a gift at this point. Essentially, you would be spending their money on a gift for them and they want you to spend it on your living expenses. When you have a job you can lavish them with gifts. For now, say thank you, be grateful to them (and express it in other ways – hugs, visits, frequent emails/texts/calls) and keep working hard.
Neef
Thanks everyone for your thoughtful responses! I agree with everything stated here.
Anonymous
Maybe I’m just getting old but I keep thinking that trends this year are so god-awful. Mules everywhere, which I think are hideous and uncomfortable. And the oversize blazer trend just doesn’t look good on anyone who isn’t tall (or thin or who has larger b**bs).
Anonymous
I agree that mules are unwearable (they don’t stay on my feet) and oversized blazers aren’t my thing (I look huge). But there are sooooo many trends out right now, that I’m just shrugging my shoulders at the ones I don’t like and moving on to the ones that I do.
s in Chicago
But are you shrugging cold shoulders? :) Mules, rufflles on everything and cold shoulders are all solid “no” for me.
Jo March
I’m not even 30 yet, and I’ve decided to sit the current trends out completely.
lsw
I have been having this exact same conversation with myself. Am I old and do I just not get it anymore, or is it all as ugly as it looks?
emeralds
Whenever I’m thinking “Jesus F Christ, that is UGLY” I remind myself that we’re at a moment where trends seem to be focused on clothing that is deliberately displeasing to the male gaze: oversized jackets and pants (in the form the much-maligned mom jeans, which I can assure you that 95% of my fashion students are wearing), not a lot of skin showing, normcore, flat shoes. And that makes me happy.
Rainbow Hair
Same. I dress a lot more… boringly?… than what is trendy now, but I love that looking at some of these clothes reminds me that there are lots of things that can go into the decision about what to wear besides “what makes me look good [as in close to a conventional standard of beauty set up to please the male gaze]?”
emeralds
Yes, that’s exactly what I was trying to get at.
lsw
Interesting perspective!
Ellen
Yes, it is difficult for us to be fashionable, if that mean’s wearing the latest styles. I prefer the styles of about 10 years ago, when I was FIRST starteing out as an attorney at law. The dresses were understated, and the top’s were NOT so revealing or plain old dumb looking in a way that is now designed to have men oooogle over us.
We as women must be respected for ourselves, not our bodies. We are strong, and we are invincible, if we do NOT let men bully us or otherwise objectify us as body parts. FOOEY on that!
Mrs. Jones
I also dislike mules.
Anon
Yeah, I’m thinking to myself, “Has everything available always been so trendy? If I buy this now, how long will I be able to wear it? I’ve been wearing a lot of the same things for YEARS. Does that mean I have always been so out of style?”. They are probably abandoning the classics to force EVERYONE to buy new things more often…not just the constant trend followers.
Anonymama
This is funny to me, because I don’t think a boxy blazer is any less “classic” than the very fitted, short blazers that were in style before… it seems to be a pendulum that swings back and forth over the decades.
Anon
I LOVE mules. They are some of the only shoes that really work for my feet (narrow heel/fat toes) and they look like boots with longer bootcuts. I also am OK with some bell sleeves (own one shirt and that’s enough). But everything else is not my style and I just won’t be shopping this year.
Anon
I also love mules because I hate shoes and they are the closest thing to work appropriate flip flops.
But yeah overall I hate everything (I’m 41) and I just am like…I’m saving so much money. LOL.
Don't Know How You Do the Voodoo that You Do
In the past year and a half, my weight has gone up 12 pounds (from 108 to 120), which is a lot, considering I’m only 5’3″. I’ve gained 5 or 6 of those pounds in the past 6 months, which also happens to be since I turned 40. Is it possible that my metabolism, which has previously been awesome, has gone that far downhill that fast? I haven’t really changed the way I eat or exercise.
Anon Lawyer
Yeah, that’s actually not a lot.
Anonymous
Yes absolutely. Isn’t life fun?
Ellen
Yes, it is difficult for us to be fashionable, if that mean’s wearing the latest styles. I prefer the styles of about 10 years ago, when I was FIRST starteing out as an attorney at law. The dresses were understated, and the top’s were NOT so revealing or plain old dumb looking in a way that is now designed to have men oooogle over us.
We as women must be respected for ourselves, not our bodies. We are strong, and we are invincible, if we do NOT let men bully us or otherwise objectify us as body parts. FOOEY on that!
cat socks
Have you had blood work to check your thyroid? That could account for a change like that.
I’m 40 and have gained about 20 lbs over the course of a few years. My hypothyroidism is under control, but I think it’s age and my 9-5 desk job.
Don't Know How You Do the Voodoo that You Do
Thyroid has historically been just a smidge on the border of low, and last test about a year ago showed it was still above the threshold for needing synthetic hormone.
If you took meds for your thyroid, did they help you lose the weight that you’d put on?
Anonymous
It is my experience that the weight gain from hypothyroidism is small but annoyingly visible. There’s a particular pattern of weight distribution that’s typical of low thyroid, and it does improve when the condition is treated.
I would want to try other things to support my thyroid if it was just borderline (stress reduction, foods high in tyrosine and iodine) before resorting to the synthetic T4. (Assuming negative antibodies.) There is a lot of controversy right now about “subclinical” hypothyroidism and what the diagnostic threshold should be, so if you have other symptoms of hypothyroidism, you may want to review your actual test results.
Anon
It doesn’t hurt to get checked out by a doctor, but that amount of weight gain in a year is a bit high for your height and presumably slight frame given the prior weight (considering your weight was constant before) but not abnormal. At 40, it’s shocking that you stayed so small for so long, your metabolism may just start processing differently at this age.
To the tall gals out there who are slim at 160, you should know that, 12 pounds is very noticeable and proportionally a lot on a small framed woman of that height.
Anon
Yep. I’m short and 12 pounds is easily a size and half, maybe two.
OfCounsel
Welcome to middle-age. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but it is even more fun once you hit 50/perimenopause. And yes – it really does happen that fast (although checking in with your doctor can’t hurt).
Anon
Are you getting the same amount of movement in per day? Make sure you are moving.
I gained about 20 lbs recently and have lost about 15 so far. I would suggest not eating three hours before bed, not snacking between meals, and fasting 12-14 hours before breakfast. Also doing an elimination diet. Check out JJ Virgin’s book. It seems gimmicky, but it works.
Get on this before the weight gain doubles or triples. Use a nutrient tracker like cronometer to just monitor WHAT you are eating so you know, not necessarily to DIET.
Weird problem
Lately, I’ve had this problem where if I have an early alarm set and somewhere I have to be, I wake up WAY in advance of it and can’t fall asleep. Alarm at 6:30 to leave house at 8? I’m up at 4:30. Alarm at 5:00 for early airport run? I’m up at 2:30 or 3. I don’t think I’m sleep-deprived otherwise or that I’m not allowing myself enough time to get ready (I always allow time for a cup of coffee at home and lingering over email or whatnot), but for some reason, my brain is anxious about having to go somewhere early. If all I’m doing is spending the morning at home, then I don’t have this problem. Has anyone experienced this? I would love tips to nip it in the bud since I need the ability to get up “normal” early for trips and things like that without being so exhausted that the whole day is ruined.
cake batter
Yep, same happens to me when I’m particularly anxious I won’t wake up on time (ex. early flight, big early meeting). It helps considerably to set multiple alarms (6:00, 6:05, 6:10) as a safeguard, and when I’m going to bed, verify out loud that I’ve set the appropriate alarms so my brain registers it.
Anonymous
Yup – totally common to have this problem when your anxiety levels are a bit high, which can happen simply by having an unusual/early appointment to wake up for.
I like the setting of multiple alarms. I do that anyway (always two) and am sure to do it carefully on the special days. It does help.
I would also work on having a little routine for when you wake up in the night if you aren’t falling back asleep anyway. Mindfulness App, music playlist for night-time that you re-play, counting slow breaths, body scan etc…
But since I fall back asleep quickly, I don’t mind it too much. My brain actually relaxes when I see that I have more time to sleep!
Good Luck
I have this same problem, except it happens almost every day. What helps me is listening to a meditation app in bed. Hearing someone’s voice guide me helps me relax more than if I just tried to meditate on my own. I often only do a five or ten minute meditation and it does often help me fall back to sleep fairly quickly (although not every single time).
Anon
You’re stressed and/or anxious. This happens to me every time I know I need to get up earlier than usual, like to go to the airport or something.
Moderation
Is Kat ever going to respond to readers about the moderation issue? Ever? How much longer do we wait before setting up that alternative daily TJ site? Sick of my posts going into mod for no reason and for so long that the morning post is finished. We’ve all complained and offered suggestions for 8+ years now.
Anonymous
Nope. And it’s prob because you’ve used more than one handle. If you do that she just always kicks you into moderation. I get it for sock puppets but it happens to people who just legit change their handle to title the threadjack too.
Linda from HR
They’ve made it very clear that once your IP goes into automod, there’s no appeals process, you’re stuck like that forever.
Anonymous
IP addresses aren’t like SSNs, you can change yours by unplugging your router and waiting 5 minutes.
Anonymous
People don’t have control over that in offices.
Anonymous
let’s please set up the site so it can start building
No Problem
I’ve come down with my first ever UTI and was prescribed Cipro, which I’ve never taken before. The urgent care doc I saw yesterday gave me that because it seemed like the infection was heading towards my kidneys and he wanted to nip that in the bud. I’m glad I didn’t wait until I could get in to see my doc today or tomorrow because my kidneys huuuuurt.
He also told me to take a probiotic since Cipro can eliminate the good bacteria too. Is there anything else I can do to avoid wrecking my immune system and/or help it rebuild? I’m not a big fan of kimchi, but I’ll eat it if I have to.
Anon
Try sauerkraut, yogurt, and kefir as well. I always like to try a variety of probiotic-containing food to maximize the different strains. Cipro is a major antibiotic so you’ll definitely want to rebuild your gut flora.
Anon in NYC
Yep. These foods are good natural sources of probiotics. But if you don’t like any of them, you can buy OTC probiotics too (Amazon, a drug store, natural foods store, etc.).
Anonymous
The sauerkraut needs to be “live” – so must be the type that’s refrigerated, not shelf stable.
KateMiddletown
Lots and lots of H2o and a high quality probiotic (check a health foods store.) Also, yogurt + kombucha to supplement. Good luck!
BelleRose
Also, hopefully your doctor told you, but while on Cipro, be sure to physically take it easy and call your doctor right away if you have joint pain! Cipro is a really high-powered antibiotic (so definitely use the probiotics), and can cause rare but very serious tendon issues.
No Problem
The prescription came with a 6-page handout describing the potential side effects, including a whole page on the tendon issue! I will certainly have no trouble taking it easy the rest of the week.
PolyD
I took Cipro a few years ago and just made sure to have my daily morning yogurt and took a probiotic. Had absolutely no problems.
One thing to consider – I don’t know if this has been established definitively, but when I was taking Cipro a colleague who studies side effects of medication told me it can do things to your ligaments/tendons. So I skipped the jumping part of my ballet class for the week I was on it, but otherwise had no problem. In contrast, a nurse colleague was skeptical of this side effect, especially for someone just taking one course of Cipro.
Nesprin
Ack no yogurt! Cipro and milk products don’t play well together. Ditto grapefruit/ grapefruit juice- it alters absorption from the gut and so you’ll get a different dose. If you’re after good bacteria, you’ll need to switch to kombucha or something not high in calcium. The ligament/tendon injury is definitely a thing that has been seen in studies infrequently.
PolyD
I don’t think I was told about cipro = no milk, although it was about 6 years ago. I was on a once-a-day pill, so if I remember right, I ate yogurt in the morning and took the pill, and probiotics, at night. I figured I’d seed myself with the yogurt in the morning, give the good bacteria a little time to settle in before hitting them with the cipro.
Rainbow Hair
No Cipro advice, but hugs on the UTI. They’re the worst. Hope you’re feeling better soon!
No Problem
Thanks! Fortunately it doesn’t hurt to pee anymore (that only lasted a day or so) but my kidneys are still really unhappy with me. I always knew UTIs were terrible but now I have incredible sympathy for people who get them chronically.
Anon
It’s often recommended here but worth mentioning again – take some d-mannose in water several times a day. (In addition to, not as a substitute for, the Cipro.) The structure of the d-mannose molecule has a binding for e-coli (the most common cause of UTIs) and helps flush it out of your system. It’s a sugar but it’s not metabolized by your body – just goes straight through it and takes e-coli bacteria with it on its way out. It’s worked really well for me. (Cranberry juice/pills on the other hand just aggravate my pain as they are harsh on the lining of the bladder for those of use with frequent UTIs.)
Anon
Another vote for D-Mannose!
First of all – hugs and sympathies. I’ve had recurrent UTIs for almost a decade now. In my case, they are 100% linked to ‘gardening’ and progress very quickly to UTI nastiness (pain and burning of course, but also bl33ding and kidney/flank pain). I have tried everything – multiple rounds of antibiotics for active infections, prophylactic antibiotics (take one pill right after gardening), cranberry pills, have even been put on long-term low dose antibiotics for two years straight to be taken twice a day, every day. Got a bunch of physical diagnostic tests done as well.
I hated that I was basically killing my good bacteria every time. In fact, I’m not sure if I was ever able to rebuild it after each course, and I have a ‘sensitive’ stomach to show for it. I finally, recently, took the plunge to go completely off the prophylactic antibiotics and rely on D-Mannose. I first started with taking a teaspoon every day and upping the dose right after gardening. Now I just take one teaspoon right before s 3 x, one teaspoon right after s 3 x, and one teaspoon next morning. It works like a charm!!!
I feel like I have my life back. We are finally able to get on with our s3xual life without the lingering fear of a UTI waiting at the other end, and it honestly makes the experience so much more enjoyable for me. I’ll tell anyone who will listen about the wonders of this (I sound like a D-Mannose evangelist!).
The one trick is to take the teaspoon of the powder with minimal water (just a couple of sips), let it make it’s way to the bladder to bind the bacteria, and then drink lots of water to ‘flush’ everything out.
Of course this is for the future – definitely complete your antibiotic course for the ongoing infection.
Lise
I just got an email for early access to Rothy’s new loafer style and am super tempted. I think posters here have talked about them being off one half size but can’t remember – should I order one half size up or down? Also, how do their soles last/has anyone had luck getting them resoled after a while? I’m hoping they might be a good commuter shoe for me this summer, and I walk a lot and am pretty hard on shoes.
lsw
They ran small for me, and even a half size up was still tight in the toe box (but my heel was close to slipping so I didn’t want to go up a whole size).
partner lady
The round toe run TTS for me, the point a bit snug – I was more comfortable a half size up. No idea on the loafers, but I may order too in my regular size. I wear mine constantly (like, daily) and am also pretty hard on soles/shoes and have not had any noticeable wear in 8 months. So, not bad! Given their construction, though, I think they’d be hard to re-sole.
Anonymous
In the round toe, I wear my normal size. Pointy toe, I go up 1/2 size.
Lise
Thanks, all! Now I just need to decide between taupe and dark camo.
Aggie
I bought the red, but the taupe were very tempting!
CB2
I haven’t shopped there before but there’s a lamp I must have. Do they often have sales/promo codes or free shipping? Or is it best to just bite the bullet and order? Wasn’t sure if it was a West Elm situation where they do 20% off quite often.
Baconpancakes
Definitely wait for promo codes. The best promos come on the backs of their catalogues, so if you sign up for mail, you’ll get a 20%-30% off before too long.
Anonymous
When do you go to the doctor with a sinus infection? I’ve never had one, but I think I do now (one side is still super runny/stuffy, over a week after I got a cold).
My 0nl1ne research suggests that sometimes they just go away without treatment…not sure whether to bank on that or go to dr. It’s annoying but not super painful or anything.
Anon
It’s a known problem that doctors overprescribe antibiotics for sinus infections (most will clear up on their own and/or are viral anyway). If you’re in severe pain or dealing with green snot, that’s one thing, but it sounds like you just need to let it run its course. Try a neti pot in the meantime.
Anonymous
No, don’t go. This is not serious. Wait it out. Hydrate, use expectorants like Mucinex, netti pot is the best.
If you have had it for months and it is green thick or bloody dark stuff coming out with fevers etc… Then maybe.
You just have a cold to get through.
Anonymous
+1 to Mucinex. And to avoiding Sudafed (or anything with a -D) that just dry you out, and inhibit things moving along.
BelleRose
They’ve done culture studies on colds and sinus infections. General rule is: less than 2 wks = viral, more than 2 wks = bacterial. So you can call your doctor after 2 wks.
Third the sinus rinse, but use the NeilMed squeeze bottle. NetiPots just rely on gravity, but with the squeeze bottle, you get some added pressure to help clear out all the gunk.
Anon in NYC
+1. I’ve experienced chronic sinus infections over the years and mostly just suffer through it when it’s not debilitating. But if you’re still having symptoms after 2 weeks, go to the doctor.
Baconpancakes
You’re probably ok to treat symptoms for two weeks or so- I had chronic sinus infections that gave me bronchitis, but even so, the doc treated the symptoms. Ended up with an inhaler, a steroid inhaler, a NeilMed nasal wash, and Flonase, which were all to treat the bronchitis and open the nasal passages to allow it to drain and get better on its own, but there wasn’t anything they could do for the actual infection.
As a first step, I’d use a NeilMed nasal wash (with distilled water!) as I find them loads easier than a neti pot. Since it’s early spring, allergies might be a culprit.
Linda from HR
I feel your pain, I came down with a nasty one a couple weeks after fully getting over my cold, and it was dreadful. I actually had chills and a low grade fever the first day, and then days of pain and congestion, it was miserable!
I wouldn’t bother going to the doctor though, unless it’s severe and hasn’t gotten better in the last week or so. Antibiotics will only help if it’s a bacterial infection, and it’s super hard to tell of it’s viral or bacterial, but either way, these things usually go away on their own. It’s not like strep where you’ll get deathly ill without penicillin. I highly recommend Sudafed, or something with pseudoephedrine and a pain reliever, if it’s bad enough (Mucinex is good if you’re only dealing with a lot of mucus but no inflammation). Warm compresses and a saline spray can help too.
EM84
Sinus infection is no fun – I used to have a chronic infection (4x per year) few years back. Congestion for weeks, pain, swelling…
What you describe does not sound like a severe infection (maybe you have omitted some symptoms to keep your post short) – at least yet. But I would call your doctor or ENT specialist and make an appointment. In the meantime, take tablets with pseudoephedrine (maybe with ibuprofene, if you have sinus pain), which will help to ease the swelling of mucosa and help with congestion. Also, take some mucolytic, which will help to clear your sinuses by thinning the mucus. And drink lots of fluids (even more when you will take mucolytics).
In case your problem is just a lingering cold, this should do the trick. In case you have an infection, you will need antibiotics and you have the appointment scheduled.
I would strongly recommend NOT to do neti pot or any other sinus rinse – if you have a bacterial infection, you will only spread the bacteria further into your sinuses and risk a much bigger complication. After your doctor confirms there is no infection (based on swab tests), neti pot is fine – but do not do it without the test results.
Jen
Wait it out for a bit. Don’t be a martyr, though. I went in after both sides of my face were throbbing (like, it was painful to smile, I had pressure EvERYWHERE). The woman at the minute clinic walked in and asked if I was here about my sinus infection or something else. I just looked at her funny and she said my incredibly swollen face was the give-away. I took amoxicillin and in 3 days I was fine (but of course I finished the drugs).
Anonymous
Thank you everyone. I’m not in severe pain, just having a gunky (and occasionally a bit bloody) endless mucus festival. I guess I will suffer a bit longer before the doctor.
Anonymous
Keep the nose moist then. Humidifier in your bedroom, ocean spray for your nose with Netti pot, Mucinex and lots of hydration.
You are different than the posters with history of chronic sinus infections above. If you don’t get them regularly, very modest symptomatic treatments are plenty.
I also like the “just call the doctor’s office” or email if you have online access and ask to speak to the nurse re: whether to come in. Often you can get simple recs and guidelines over the phone.
Horse Crazy
Advil Allergy and Sinus usually works well for me…it does make me a bit drowsy, but it definitely helps with the pain.
Houston
I’m in Houston this week for work and am hoping to have a handful of nights to explore. Any recommendations for things to do? I’m particularly interested in restaurant recommendations close to downtown. Thanks in advance!
Anonymous
The blog extra petite just had a long post on Houston. Enjoy!
Houstonian
It’s a big week in downtown Houston – the Astros home opener is today and their World Series ring ceremony is tomorrow. There’s a Rockets basketball game tomorrow night, too, and both stadiums are walkable if you’re staying downtown. For restaurants, I highly recommend Xochi in the Marriott Marquis and The Grove in Discovery Green Park. Houston is known for its great food, so no matter what cuisine you’re looking for you can find it in or around downtown. Discovery Green hosts outdoor events all week – you can google the calendar. House of Blues is downtown if you’re looking for live music. I also took a great “Haunted Downtown” tour a few years ago – I’m sure something like that is still around if that’s up your alley. I hope you have a great visit!
HeightsHeifer
Totally agree with The Grove – it’s one of my favorite restaurants. Even though I’m a big fan of the Pappas franchise (Pappasito’s and Pappadeaux), I don’t really care for their downtown locations. Within downtown and nearby areas are some of my favorites: Hearsay Gastro Lounge, Breakfast Klub, Coltivare, Boil House (definitely make a trip since it’s crawfish season!), Niko Niko’s, and Hughie’s. Lots of fun coffee shops at A 2nd Cup, Antidote, and Café Brasil. Tons of breweries, lots of Tex Mex, authentic Vietnamese, and if you’re willing to go further outside downtown, any kind of food you want. Ugly Delicious (on Netflix) just had an episode talking about how Houston is the food capital of the world right now – so much yum.
Some areas of Houston are still recovering from Harvey, so parts of The Cistern may still be closed, and Eleanor Tinsley Park and Buffalo Bayou don’t look as nice as they usually do but certainly worth a stroll on a nice day. Museum District and Montrose neighborhood for culture, Heights neighborhood for antiques and history (1st Saturday Arts Market is this weekend), and Washington Ave and EaDo for nightlife.
In-House in Houston
I went to the Cistern in December…it’s open! Really neat!
Anonymous
Any recs for a reliable appliance repair (fridge) company that services Center City Philly? I thought there would be a million companies but Yelp is showing only a few that service this area, and the reviews are problematic for most of them.
nutella
Any recommendations for home security system?
We could do the new ones like SimpliSafe or Nest (we have the thermostats already), the traditional ones like ADT, etc. or we could bundle it with cable like C0mcast or AT &T. Any thoughts? We will probably want a camera and we do not wish to go down the Al3xa/echo/g00gle home route. We are moving to an extremely safe neighborhood, this is more because we are moving into a house from a 24-hour doorman high rise and I’m still new to being so much more accessible.
Anonymous
Yeah all of this is an unnecessary waste of money.
Anon
Disagree. Homes with security systems deter property crime more than those that don’t have them.
nutella
I didn’t ask whether it was worth it to spend the money; I want to spend the money. I’m asking for recommendations.
Rainbow Hair
We have SimpliSafe with the professional monitoring and I think it’s in the $30/month range? I like how it’s modular and how we install it ourselves. It’s pretty intuitive.
Anonymous
+1
I got SimpliSafe on the recommendation of this website. I’m happy with it. I bought a re-furbished kit off their website using a coupon code for a nice discount. Costs me $15 per month for my level of monitoring. Love that I can dismantle it and bring to my next apartment with me, that I can stop at any time without penalties, good price. Lots of flexibility in set up. My apartment insurance also went down slightly when I told them I installed the system and sent them proof.
I do have to pay a nominal fee to my city each year for their assistance with responding to my alarms. Like $50? They came once when a plant of mine got so large (!) that it toppled off its shelf and activated a motion detector. Kind of embarrassing but it was really reassuring how fast they responded and nice to see the system worked.
My apartment was broken into 2 years ago, and I got the security system after that, and my landlord pays half of the monthly cost (so cheap, they quickly agreed). I display the signs prominently in front of our building and in my windows and front/back doors that I have a security system. In my town, no house/condo that has signs displayed gets broken into. Your area may be different, but it is true for my area.
But probably the best advice I learned from my robbery was NOT to keep valuable jewelry in obvious places. That means not in the bedroom/bedroom closet/bedroom dressers and not in the bathroom/medicine cabinets. They tossed those areas very well, and found my most valuable jewelry (in the bathroom), but didn’t find anything I had stored in other rooms.
Un-handy
How difficult are these to install? For really un-handy people who maybe want to cry a little bit over any project involving a power drill?
CPA Lady
They attach with command strips. Extremely easy. I installed them all over my whole house and basement/garage in about 45 minutes.
CPA Lady
You can screw them in with a drill, but you dont have to)
Anonymous
I’m not handy so it took me longer than CPA Lady, but they are really simple to set up.
What took me the longest was planning what to buy and where to put things. The installation was straightforward, and their customer service line was very helpful.
Delta Dawn
I don’t have a good recommendation but can wholeheartedly give two thumbs down to Comcast home security. (I do think a security system is a great idea, though, and not a waste of money at all. But don’t use Comcast.)
nutella
Thank you — this is helpful! Why not (if it doesn’t fill you with rage)?
Anonymous
Do you have a dog? We don’t but we still have a ‘beware of dog’ sign on our fence and in our window. Per our local police service, they get so many false alarms and thieves are often in and out so quickly that a big dog , not an alarm system, is the biggest factor that will make them chose someone else’s house.
Whatever you get, get really good cameras with high quality video not just the alarm. Gives the police the best chance at catching them. And make sure you turn it on consistently.
DC anon
I learned about Galileo Camps through a recommendation on this s i t e and it looks amazing! I have passed on the rec to my west coast friends. Is there anything like that in the DC area? I have been looking around and haven’t found much. Thanks!!
Anonymous
Not sure if this is quite the same, but there are several week-long science camps at Georgetown Prep in Bethesda (some in partnership with museums) -https://www.esfcamps.com/georgetownprep/programs/specialty-major-camps/
anon a mouse
CTY run through Hopkins.
Anon
As a CTY alumna, I wholeheartedly endorse it.
Anon
Also did CTY, and another camp called SIG. Great experiences.
Staying motivated at a not great job
Any tips for staying motivated/getting through the day at a job you don’t like? (Other than looking for a new job!)
Calico
I found that venting about how much I hated my job to friends and family had the opposite effect- I didn’t feel relieved, instead I felt overly worked up. I think focusing on the negative aspects of my job poisoned the well for me so every day was torture. In hindsight I wish I had focused on the good aspects of my job and reminded myself that it wouldn’t be this bad forever, while job searching of course!
Shopaholic
Do things outside of work that you enjoy. Having other things to look forward to really helped me when I was miserable at my job.
KellyK
I have what’s probably a weird question about courtroom attire. My husband and I are working on becoming foster parents, which will mean showing up for the various hearings for any kids in our care. Since foster parents are an extension of DSS, I’m assuming we should be dressed up to the level of the social workers, rather than the lawyers. Nice blouse or sweater, slacks, dressy flats for me, dress slacks and a button down shirt for my husband (tie?). Does that sound reasonable? Does that match the way social workers, CASA volunteers, etc. tend to dress for family court?
(For reference, we work in a pretty casual environment. I wear jeans to work most days, and only dress up for meetings. My husband wears khakis and polo shirts pretty much exclusively.)
Anonymous
I’m an attorney, but I generally tell non-attorneys appearing in court with me to dress nicely, but that a suit and tie, or the female equivalent, are not required. And I think that certainly holds here. Especially in juvenile/family court. Frankly, jeans would probably be fine for you, but it couldn’t hurt to wear slightly nicer pants (black ankle pants maybe?) or a wrap dress or equivalent.
Anonymous
Yes, this is on point. I’d describe it as business casual.
Anonymous
I used to do child protection/DSS matters and what you’ve described is perfect. Don’t stress if for some reason you get called into an emergency meeting/hearing. A judge isn’t going to be swayed by a polo shirt instead of a button down.
Court can be stressful so pick something that makes you feel comfortable and confident. And thank you for becoming foster parents. There is a huge need to good quality foster homes.
mil woes
Need some advice/commiseration/perspective on my MIL:
She’s generally tough to handle – needy, emotionally manipulative, hard to please, etc. Luckily, she lives 4 hours away and I’ve tried to take the approach that my husband can “handle” her how he wants to, so long as it doesn’t have a huge impact on me/our relationship. In the past, this meant things like we’d decide we were happy to host family for christmas for 5 days and he could figure out when/how to deliver the message that no, she couldn’t come stay in our house for 12 days, even if it meant dancing around stuff a lot more than I would with my family.
I probably should have seen this coming, but as our family has grown, it’s been harder and harder to isolate her impact. Our daughter is now 2.5, and I’m getting totally uncomfortable with how MIL interacts with her in certain situations. For example, daughter is hugely into getting to control who plays what with her. Our rule has basically been that she can decide who to play with, but she needs to be polite about it. “No, mommy, I’d like to play with my blocks alone please” is fine. “Don’t touch that, no, stop, go away!!!” is not fine. MIL just left after a quick visit on her way to a wedding, and she couldn’t accept when my daughter said no to something. It was all – I drove so far to see you, you’re hurting my feelings, you’re making me sad, do you want to make grandma cry???
How do we stop this and lay down the law and stop MIL from emotionally messing with our baby! Every example in isolation seems so small and silly, but she is truly crazy and I feel like this is going to spiral into insanity so quickly.
Anonymous
By saying something when it happens. Bringing it up later is pointless. “Actually she can play with whatever she wants.” “Excuse me. Stop threatening our toddler with your feelings. She isn’t responsible for that.” “Why don’t you come into the kitchen and have a cup of tea, our toddlers job is not entertaining you.”
S
Seriously? All three of these are really rude. This seems like a good way to turn something really minor into something major with your in-laws. I’d examine if you’re actually trying to use your child as a source for your own manipulation here.
Anonymous
This. “threatening our toddler with your feelings” will definitely escalate the situation.
Anonymous
Your DH says “Mom, please don’t speak to Kid’s Name that way.”
Separately, he has a phone call reminding her of typical 2.5 year old development so she can moderate her expectations. And if she is just by for a short visit (like a couple hours), plan an activity that they can participate in together that will be appealing to the 2.5 year old – decorating cookies is my go-to. (jar of icing and sprinkles from baking cupboard)
Anonymous
Ordinarily I’m all for each partner dealing with their family of origin. One exception is for things that need to be called out in the moment, like this. Most adult children of people like this really struggle with boundary-setting, to the point that it’s almost unreasonable to expect them to be able to set the right boundary in the moment. Even if DH was sitting right there, he might not recognize how wrong MIL was because that’s what he grew up with. It’s perfectly fine for OP to step in right then to correct the issue, as long as DH reflects and follows up with MIL later.
Anon in NYC
Agreed. If I was the person in the room, I’d say something to MIL in the moment, and then tell your daughter, “that’s okay honey, you don’t need to play with grandma if you don’t want to right now, but remember that you need to be polite when saying no.” DH can address it after the fact.
I view it the same way as I do body autonomy at this age – my kid doesn’t need to hug grandma and grandpa if she doesn’t want to, but she should politely decline rather than shouting “NO” in their faces.
Anon
Haha! Glad I’m not the only one with a baby who loves to yell NO! At people
Anon
Sort of agree with Anon in NYC. I think that is the perfect script for the daughter and that only saying that should take care of the situation. I don’t think there is any need to say anything to MIL. She’ll hear what you say to your child and that’s that.
Anonymous
With the idea that things need to be called out in the moment. But, in dealing with a difficult MIL, I’ve learned that if both DH and I are present, and I call her out not DH then she will assume DH did not call her out because DH agrees with her and she will state that/push the issue towards DH ‘picking sides’. Which can make things worse. OP needs to chat with DH in advance to ensure he’s on alert to inappropriate behavior and that if she calls something out, he immediately repeats the concern to avoid the tug of war issue.
Jo March
This. I grew up as the child in this scenario and my mom’s MIL could not stomach anything my mom said – in fact if my mom set boundaries, she would go out of her way to break that boundary, even if my dad would back my mom up afterwards. Your MIL may not be as extreme, but some people just refuse to take any level of direction when it doesn’t line up with what they want.
With that said, I would urge you to continue empowering your child with that level of autonomy even if grandma pushes back. My parents’ solution was that I could have my normal rules at home with them, but that all bets were off with the grandparents and that I just had to comply to keep the family peace. It made me really resentful of those grandparents because I hated that they didn’t care about getting to know me or respecting my comfort level and seemed to only want a “cookie cutter grandchild” who was meant to be seen, not heard.
Emily
Yup. my FIL will do things like get into a battle of logic with my 3 year old over the remote control. “FIL, she’s 2. She doesn’t care that you Always Watch Fox News at 3pm. She wants to watch Daniel Tiger or snuggle with you.”
BB
I post this whenever one of these difficult MIL questions comes up…search for the “Alice” story on Captain Awkward. It doesn’t address what you should do with your child specifically, but gives great insight into the psyche of people like this.
LadyNFS
Thanks for suggesting this! I just read it and am bookmarking for future reference on dealing with my emotionally manipulative and abusive MIL.
nutella
Your husband needs to talk to his mom – “Mom, please stop guilting Baby – she is too little to understand those feelings and how to handle them and we are ok with her letting her have autonomy on these issues, so long as she is polite about it. Plus at her age, she mimics everything and we really can’t have her guilt-tripping us over not having ice cream for dinner. She will turn into a baby tyrant! :) ” It might help for her to see her son model how you guys handle it and what kind of behavior you allow and what you correct. I have seen from siblings that when parenting styles differ from their parents (or advice from doctors has changed in the last 30 years), they will attribute it to the pediatrician or daycare rules: “These are her daycare rules, too, so we try to keep things the same at home, too.”
Anonymous
It may help to shrug and say that baby is going through a phase right now and that it’s better to leave it be to prevent a meltdown. There’s a type of person who will understand that phase thing better than the concept of “baby wanting to determine who she plays with.” Most kids are pretty good at ignoring someone trying to guilt trip them, and kids have to learn to deal with weirdness at some point. I don’t think there’s much of anything you can do that will be effective since she sounds like the type of person who would ignore you. Enlist your husband.
Jo March
Basic Roth IRA Q: I’m not sure if a graduate degree is in my future (or if my current employer will pay for most of it), so I’ve been hesitant to max out my Roth IRA in case that money becomes inaccessible for paying for graduate school (I don’t make enough to be able to max it out and save enough otherwise). I know you can withdraw contributions without penalty for some situations – does anyone know if graduate school is one of them (or know where I can found out)? My initial googling has left me more confused.
Anonymous
https://www.schwab.com/public/schwab/investing/retirement_and_planning/understanding_iras/roth_ira/withdrawal_rules
Look at the section on Age 59 1/2 and under. There are withdrawal scenarios where you will own Taxes AND Penalties on the amount you take out. If the Roth is less than 5 years old, there are scenarios where you will owe taxes, but not penalities. And if it’s over 5 years old, there are scenarios where you don’t owe taxes or penalties.
Jo March
Thanks!
This Old House
My spouse and I are buying an 1880s-built Victorian house. It’s in good condition with all the modern updates, but we realize it’s going to be higher-maintenance than a newer house. We have a comfortable amount of savings for big repairs but are not at all handy ourselves. Anyone with old house experience have any advice? (Other than “don’t do it!”)
Anonymous
Is this your first house? My advice probably isn’t helpful if you’re accustomed to home ownership, but fwiw, I like having at least 2 handymen I can call if something needs fixing, and I offer to pay them a little more if they’ll walk me through how to do whatever they’re doing. Youtube is also pretty good for simple things. It’s hard to know what to expect in an older house so you just kind of learn as you go along.
tesyaa
It really depends on what’s been updated. Have pipes been replaced (for example)? Wiring? Or have all the updates been cosmetic? Windows and installing insulation can be expensive but can make life a whole lot more comfortable.
JuniorMinion
Pick a “good enough” point where you will stop doing work. The people I have seen have issues with old homes are those who want new home perfection. Everything is a bit more complex and expensive with an old home – My floors which are almost 100 years old and original look like 100 years of people have walked on them and are solid hardwoods with a subfloor and no slab. Walls / ceilings were done by hand and as such don’t have the perfect finish of modern drywall. We still have the original heat grating system throughout our home. If I insisted on fixing all these items it would cost $$$$. We had to focus our repair $ and make choices.
On a practical level, keep up with ongoing wear and tear (things like replacing siding, fixing electrical wiring etc.) when you notice things that need attention – this should help stave off big issues.
Anonymous
This. Budget and save for the major things, but have a rotation and plan for “routine upkeep” things every year, even if its relatively minor like patching cracks in plaster walls, making sure peeling paint is taken care of, updating something — because if all those things add up over a couple of years, all of a sudden the house can look neglected and dumpy fast. There’s a difference between patina and neglect, and old houses can tip fast in the neglect direction.
Anon
Lots of old house experience here- they can be fabulous, but if you aren’t handy you will probably be spending a lot of money. I have grown up living in houses from 1800s and have an old house now- our family’s motto is “better than it was” when fixing stuff. Everything is going to be custom size, windows all different sizes, standard stuff is not going to fit correctly. You want to be the type of person that finds beauty in imperfection. :) I would find a handyman that meets those standards and try not to worry if something doesn’t look perfect.
brokentoe
Ask your realtor for recommendations for their “people” who are accustomed to working on old house systems and interiors. Become friendly with your new neighbors who are also likely to be dealing with similar issues. Basically, have some idea of who to call (or conversely, who NOT to call) when you have repair or replacement needs. And enjoy being a good steward of your own piece of history!
Chl
We’re in a similar boat and I think the advice above is good. Accepting that you’ll need to spend money and time and planning for that rather than it being a surprise. I love my old house and I always try to remember to appreciate the beauty and how important it is to me to love that.
anne-on
Is it possible to check with your local town on the permits for the house? We have an old house (1860s) and one of the previous owners did the work on their own (owner pulled permits are allowed in our town). It was all terribly shoddily done even though it looked ‘new’ and ‘updated’ from the outside. So if you can check, it might save your some heartache. Otherwise, be prepared that if you do work on your own, you never quite know what is behind the walls, and you may have to spend a lot of time and money bringing things up to code from when they were originally done (be in 150 or 50 years ago).
Anonymous
Make sure all the wiring, on all floors, is updated. Be careful of insulation. It probably doesn’t have any insulation, so your heating and cooling costs can be quite high. You may be able to put some in, but use a reputable person – sometimes insulating old houses can cause mold problems due to a lack of moisture barrier.
Anon
I live in a neighborhood where my 1920 home is a spring chicken. Especially if you’re in a historic district, Nextdoor is a good resource if you have specific needs – my neighbors give fairly unfiltered reco’s to specific inquiries. If you have neighbors with similar homes on your street, go talk to them. They might have a lot of insight on your house and you can learn from what they’ve done to their house and who’s helped them with it.
I wholeheartedly endorse learning to love some of the imperfections. My house has a piece of corner trim that was chewed by a dog at some point (not horribly visible, one has ever noticed without me pointing it out). It bothered me until I came to the realization that people LIVE in houses. I don’t want a suburban cookie-cutter, and I don’t live in a museum, so the ghosts of dogs past and I can learn to get along. Oh, and definitely dive into the history of your home! Learning some fun facts about mine has made me love it all the more.
Anon
I’m 31, married a year, and 6 weeks pregnant. I’m starting to fully understand why women get so stressed about others commenting on their bodies/pregnancy/reproductive plans.
We spent this past weekend with husband’s family for Easter, including two meals out. let me preface this by saying i am not a big drinker but usually order a glass of wine at dinner. well, for the first time ever, husbands mom started commenting on why i wasn’t drinking (i ordered a beer to try to head off any comments but only drank 1/3). The same thing at brunch when i didn’t order a cocktail. It is so uncomfortable and made me so angry. We aren’t going to tell anyone until I’m at least 10 weeks along and i don’t think it’s anyone’s business! I’m dreading an upcoming beach vacation with two couple friends- both women are pregnant- because one of them comments constantly about what other women are or aren’t drinking or speculating about pregnancy. I really want to enjoy this vacation and not be put on the spot. Any suggestions?
Anonymous
Tell your pregnant friends that you’re pregnant
Anonymous
I guess we could but it seems so early to tell anyone about it (I’ll be less than 8 weeks at that point) and I would feel terrible telling anyone before we tell our parents.
Anonymous
So say that? “Jane, I don’t know what you want me to say. If I were pregnant – and I’m not saying I am – then I wouldn’t want to tell anyone until I was out of the woods and had a chance to tell my parents. So you need to drop it. NOW.” Followed by a pointedly aggressive eyebrow raise.
Anonymous
Or if you don’t want to go that far – “Jane, your questions are making me feel put on the spot and uncomfortable, please stop.”
I generally find “I feel” statements to be a more comfortable way of calling people out for their bad behavior. It’s a lot easier to say – I feel X – than to say – you’re doing something wrong.
Oh and when you announce it, be ready for her to cackle, I KNEW IT, loud enough to wake the dead.
Anon
How about, “I just don’t feel like drinking right now?”
Anonymous
I mean, yes, that is what I will do — but that will only go so far when spending 4 days with them. I just wish people would use their common sense and not put women on the spot like that. I did not do it with this woman in particular even though I suspected she was pregnant (we actually went on a vacation with them when she was 6 weeks along).
tesyaa
She doesn’t sound like someone I would want to vacation with, pregnant or non-pregnant. Commiseration.
Anonymous
It doesn’t really sound like a common sense thing, at least with your friend. I can forgive oblivious blundering to an extent. Heck I’m sure I’ve been guilty of it myself. But your friend isn’t blindly sticking her foot in her mouth, she’s super nosy and will go out of her way to put you on the spot. Her desire to know everything about everyone is more important than avoiding making others feel uncomfortable. Super rude.
Equestrian Attorney
Commiseration. I’m not even pregnant and my MIL was all over me at Easter brunch – why aren’t you drinking the red wine/cocktails/etc? I was feeling under the weather and they always drink A LOT – it was so annoying to keep repeating “I just don’t really feel like drinking right now” and it felt like the pregnancy patrol, even though I had a glass of wine with diner. Sorry you are dealing with this, and agree that everyone should just back off.
Anonymous
Ugh, that’s stressful and irritating – I’m sorry! “I’m on ‘antibiotics'” has worked for me in the past. Or ward annoying friends off at the pass by saying ‘I’m drinking less to prep for TTC’ (which is plausible given that you’re recently married, etc. – never mind that cutting alcohol while TTC is rarely necessary in practice)?
Anonymous
Thanks – both good suggestions. Maybe I can get away with a combination of your second suggestion and saying I’m trying to lose weight.
Anon
I stop drinking before long training runs or distance races (pretty much anything a 10K or longer). If it’s at all applicable, you could say something about cutting out alcohol for athletic reasons.
Anon
Also please don’t feel like you need to order a beer in order to avoid suspicion. Drink if you feel like it, not because you are being pressured to do so.
Anon
For your husband’s family, he should have backed you up. “Fertility issues are fraught. Please do not comment on them, my wife’s alcohol consumption, or the contents of her uterus. If we have something to tell you, we will.”
As for the pregnant friend: “If we have something to tell you, we will. We don’t have anything to tell you.”
I would also suggest a diversion into a semi-related discussion about something like a friend with fertility issues. “This whole discussion reminds me of my friend Sarah, who has been trying for three years. She ends up in tears when people make cutesy remarks to her, because she so wants a baby but can’t talk to people about infertility. My other friend Karen really does not want kids, and is so tired of her MIL’s comments about owing her grandkids. Her MIL even bought them baby clothes. It just always blows my mind when people start making such a personal issue their business.”
Nesprin
G&T minus the T, or selzer with limes or mint. You have to order at the bar is the only trick.
anon
I usually just say that I am having GI issues and dr recommended that I stop drinking for the time being.
That, and explicitly telling people not to comment on my personal business.
Anon
I stopped drinking months before we got pregnant to make it easier to conceive. I also helped with this issue – people were used to me not drinking. They all assumed I was either pregnant or trying (and I guess they weren’t wrong), but nobody made a big deal. I’m a little shocked that you’re running into so much pushback. It’s sort of an unspoken rule that when a woman your age who usually drinks doesn’t that something is going on, but you let it go because everyone knows you don’t want to tell yet. This is crazy. I don’t know what to say to you except you’re amazing and these people need lives.
Anon
What should I tell interviewers my reason for leaving my last firm was? I was hired as a first year associate at a small firm, was the only associate working 100% on litigation, but after about a year the needs of the firm changed and they wanted a partner-level person to handle litigation, not a young associate, leaving me without any work. They think they found this person, but if it doesn’t work out they’re just going to wind up the litigation practice completely. Thanks! (I’ve been telling interviewers that they are winding up the litigation practice).
Anonymous
I would say that there is not enough work and you want a bigger, more diverse etc. practice, more people to work with etc. The winding up the practice, while true and not your fault, may hurt the firm’s rep in the community, get to clients, etc. and you don’t want that.
Anon
Thank you! I guess my #1 concern is that employers might call to verify? Is that a thing?
Anon
I would leave it as a more general “restructuring their litigation department” and there is no work for you.
Anonymous
I’m 31, married a year, and 6 weeks pregnant. I’m starting to fully understand why women get so stressed about others commenting on their bodies/pregnancy/reproductive plans.
We spent this past weekend with husband’s family for Easter, including two meals out. let me preface this by saying i am not a big drinker but usually order a glass of wine at dinner. well, for the first time ever, husband’s mom started commenting on why i wasn’t drinking (i ordered a beer to try to head off any comments but only drank 1/3). The same thing at brunch when i didn’t order a mimosa. It is so uncomfortable and made me so angry. We aren’t going to tell anyone until I’m at least 10 weeks along and i don’t think it’s anyone’s business! I’m dreading an upcoming beach vacation with two couple friends- both women are pregnant- because one of them comments constantly about what other women are or aren’t drinking or speculating about pregnancy. I really want to enjoy this vacation and not be put on the spot. Any suggestions?
Anonymous
What’s your “goal” salary. I don’t mean like it’d be nice to make $5mil even though I’m a social worker. I mean the number where you think – if I made $x next year or in the next 5 years, I’d be in good shape. Helpful if you could state industry and city.
Anonymous
OP here – 225-250k. Law. DC. Which means I’m contemplating leaving the government for private practice again though debating the negatives like job security.
Fed Atty
I’m in the same boat, contemplating whether it would ever be worth it to leave my flexible, 40 hour position where I will be stuck at GS-15 for the rest of my career, or leave for the uncertainty of private practice and greater salary potential.
To the OP’s question, I don’t have a goal salary right now, but I would ideally like to see a bump (maybe 20%) in my salary every few years.
Anonymous
Which way are you leaning? I’m leaning towards going. I feel like it’s wasting my potential to not make money – if I can get an offer of course. But then everyone tells me – you’re at a financial regulator, you’ll get to 200k (in like 5 years), an extra 25-50k isn’t worth it . . . .
Fed Atty
I’m staying, at least while my kids are young. My bosses are great, my work is reasonably interesting, and the hours/flexibility are wonderful. At this point, it seems ridiculous to give that up for more money, but I’m sure in 10 years I will feel really stagnated. Sometimes I think about leaving to start my own practice, but while that it would a new challenge for sure, it would also be less money.
Fed
My ideal is probably 200K but I’m maxed out in gov’t and love my job, so I don’t see leaving anytime soon. HHI is $400-450K so we’re extremely fortunate, although I think my husband wishes he could dial it back a little and that I could go into private practice.
Fed
I should add, I’m at 160K now.
Anon
50k as an individual contributor (higher ed staff). Was at 50k a few years ago, but in a job with supervisory responsibilities and insane hours. Currently making less but with a regular schedule, better benefits and no babysitting. Getting back up to 50k would give me a bit more breathing room.
Anonymous
Goal is $200. Funny thing is, i make more than that now in big law ($260k plus bonus) but will obviously have to take a pay cut when i eventually leave.
Anonymous
Goal is $150k. Medicine. Chicago.
Anonymous
Mine has been $200K for a while now, and I finally made it last year after being less than $500 under for several years.
Anon
Family goal is $240k net, not sure what that would be accounting for income tax and ss, but that is what I think we’d need to be comfortable and save for retirement.
Anonymous
LCOL East Coast, contract management. $115k is which is my take-home salary now + a take-home amount that covers my SL payment. It’s very feasible at the org where I am now in 5 years.
emeralds
Putting one out there for all the normies: $50k, mid-sized southern capital, higher ed admin. It will probably never happen in my current job, although I’ve gone from $41k to $45k in three years, which is an unusually large jump for my employer. (Combination of merit and lucky timing.)
Goal for HHI is to gross six figures. We’re around $85-7k now, depending on how motivated my SO is to pick up shift work on top of his normal hours. I feel like my brain is going to explode when (and if) we get there.
Anonymous
Thank you for sharing this – from another normie!
Anonymous
Yes, thank you for sharing!
Anon
Another normie saying thanks! These are starting to get ridiculous.
Anon
Our HHI goal used to be $150K gross in Chicago suburbs. But we have two kids in daycare and after care/ summer camp so I think we’re now shooting for $175K. We’re close to the higher number now and I feel like we’ll be in decent shape once we’re there. That will give us enough to afford our (modest) house and a nicer summer camp/ after care program, and go back to saving a bit for retirement and college. Ideally we’ll be a few thousand over that in a few years and then we can take some nice family vacations.
Anonymous
Goal $180 (in house/Northern VA)
babylawyer
Currently at 55K and severly underpaid. Would like to get to 100K eventually (not in Biglaw)
3rd year environmental lawyer in HCOL area
Waterloo
Currently make about $350K (base + bonus) before stock-based comp, working in PR/communications in HCOL city. Goal would be less about increasing that base and more about clearing seven figures in equity over the next several years.
Jen
For me, I wanted to hit $200k just to say I did. DH and I are on the Boston ‘burbs and we built our lifestyle around $280 in income. In the last 5 years or so, we’ve made anything from $280k to $480k (crazy year) but we hover around $300k. We have similar earning power, 3 kids, school loans paid off. We figure our $280 number allows for one of us to have a Corporate Job (currently that’s DH, who makes $230k inc bonus) and a part time or lower paying full time job (currently that’s me,’doing freelance consulting part time making ~90k). Or both of us to work in full time roles a step or two below where we are now (eg each make ~150k). That $280k includes maxes retirement and a fairly flexible lifestyle (eating out, lawn service, biweekly house cleaner, the Nice Preschool, a week or two of family vacation etc) and we could drive different cars and spend less if we had to.
10 Year Law School Reunion
Coming up in a few weeks. What should I wear?! Evening event, at a not-fancy bar.
Flats Only
Whatever makes you look and feel the most hot and successful?
Mum for this one
Can anyone recommend an employment attorney in NYC- i.e. someone who could tell me if a pattern of behavior and treatment constitutes discrimination, and help me if so?
Anonymous
Corey Stark. He’s a solo. G00gle will have his contact info.
Anon
My parents are both retiring this summer and my sister and I are trying to think of a nice gift to give them. They are adamantly opposed to the idea of a big retirement party so we’re thinking of a vacation or weekend getaway, either just for them or maybe the family. Looking for suggestions near where they live (Virginia/DC area). Any thoughts?
Anonymous
Loudon County is nearby and has a bunch of nice resorts. The wine country there is wonderful too if they’re into wine.
Pompom
I wouldn’t hate a weekend at the Salamander in Middleburg if I were them…
anon a mouse
St. Michaels or Annapolis, Md. Chincoteague, Va. If they like the mountains, Luray or New Market, Va.
CountC
My retired parents LOVE The Homestead in VA.
emeralds
In addition to Loudoun County (especially the Salamander, swoon), Charlottesville.
Flats Only
If they are at all foody you could get them a certificate for dinner and a night’s stay at the Inn at Little Washington.
Anonymous
Quick FMLA question – my employer uses FMLA as part of maternity leave. (gotta love unpaid maternity leave!) If an FMLA day falls over a federal holiday when the office would otherwise be closed, does that count as an FMLA day or is it excluded? In my case I will probably be using FMLA over July 4th. Is this part of the federal rules or is it company specific?
Lots to Learn
The regulations say: If you’re taking FMLA in increments of more than a week, the holiday has no effect – you will be charged with taking a week of FMLA. If you’re taking FMLA in increments of less than a week, then you won’t be charged for a day when the employer would otherwise be closed. So if you’re on maternity leave, you’re likely taking more than a week, so the fact that July 4 falls during the middle of it won’t give you an extra day.
Leatty
It counts as an FMLA day. Here is a excerpt from the DOL’s website: “When a holiday falls during a week in which an employee is taking the full week of FMLA leave, the entire week is counted as FMLA leave. However, when a holiday falls during a week when an employee is taking less than the full week of FMLA leave, the holiday is not counted as FMLA leave, unless the employee was scheduled and expected to work on the holiday and used FMLA leave for that day.”
Not Fluent in Preppy
I am a 25 year old law student from the Northwest who will be interning on the Hill in DC this summer. I am building my work wardrobe because offices where I live tend to be pretty darn casual.
Here’s my question: are sweater sets still in? I think they can be actually really cute and would like to get a white set and a pink set for days Congress is not in session, but I’m having a hard time finding them and am worried they’ll seem super frumpy or East Coast Lady Who Does Lunch.
If I were your intern and I walked in wearing a matching sweater set – would you make fun of me? Be honest.
BabyAssociate
Would I make fun of you? No, but I definitely would not say sweater sets are “in,” if you care about that
Anonymous
Also, sweater sets are hot. DC is a freaking swamp in the summer, so if you go this route, make sure you’re OK with commuting or walking around outside without the topper on.
Fed Atty
+1
Anonymous
Keep in mind commuting and the fact that DC is typically hotter than the Northwest…I don’t wear sweaters in the summer in DC period. A sweater set may be okay to wear, but probably not advisable?
Anonymous
I would agree with BabyAssociate that sweater sets are not “in”. Not offensive. You wont be made fun of. Yes, it is a bit matronly/ladies who lunch. But maybe simple and totally appropriate for days Congress is in session.
What are your goals? To be support staff? Or to be the one being staffed? Dress like THAT?
Anonymous
Get them if you like them. I wouldn’t say it’s “in” to wear them as a set. But you can get a good bit of wear out of both pieces by wearing a silk shell under the cardigan and the sweater shell under a blazer so it doesn’t look overly matchy.
Anon
Congratulations! And hello, lobbyist here :) Sweater sets aren’t really in, but they never really go out either. If you love them, get one – but try to pair it with a more fun necklace (like J.Crew Factory) instead of pearls.
Other tips:
– Buy dressy flats or low wedges. No one wears heels (pumps). You can always tell the out of towners by their heels. You will be doing so.much.walking.
– Unless your office has told you otherwise, one, no more than two, suits should do you for the summer. Light gray or navy would be my first choices. Hearings generally slow down significantly during summer and that’s the primary time you’d wear them.
– A reliable wardrobe (and what I frequently wear to lobby on the Hill during the summer and suffocating humidity) would be pencil skirt + dressy t-shirt with a scoop neck + summery blazer or cardigan + fun necklace. I have 4 of the J.Crew Factory No. 2 pencil skirts in cotton in different colors and rotate those with different modal t-shirts from T.J. Maxx and a white or linen blazer. (I’m frugal and just can’t bring myself to spend lots of money on clothing.)
– If you’re working for a D, you can generally be more casual; Rs are dressier. When I worked there, I was told one more than one occasion, “You dress too nicely to be a Dem!” So, yeah, that’s a thing. Unless your office has a suit dress code (very rare), the generally vibe for staffers is business casual. During recess, male staffers wear jeans/polo shirt/sneakers or boat shoes, so don’t be afraid to bring some more comfortable clothes, particularly if you’ll be here through August recess.
Welcome! You’ll have a great time! :)
Anonymous
Not OP, but found this very interesting. Thanks.
Anonymous
I wouldn’t necessarily say high heels are solely worn by transplants on the Hill who don’t know any better, though. I don’t know what shoe style OP prefers but if she is comfortable sitting/walking briskly in heels that are higher than 3 inches for more a few hours than I’d say it’s her call.
Anonymous
Not that I recommend OP to wear 5-inch stilettos, and OP’s specific position and the amount of walking it normally entails would matter, of course. I had no issues wearing under-4 inch pumps almost every day and walk around more than several miles in different jobs (political organization intern, analyst, etc) but YMMV.
Anonymous
My comment doesn’t seem like it was published, so let me try again. I would not recommend OP to wear 5-inch stilettos, of course, and her specific job description and the amount of walking it normally entails do matter. I did not have any issues walking around several miles or more in under-4 inch pumps during workdays in different functions (political organization intern, analyst, etc), but YMMV as I like the polishedness well-made pumps add to my outfit and actually prefer them to flats.
DC Lawyer
I wouldn’t make fun of you but this is not what I would wear for a law student internship on the Hill. Generally speaking, I’m guessing you want to be perceived as “professional” more than “really cute.” Especially since a lot of the value of these types of internships is the networking.
You’ll be better off in a dress and cardigan/blazer or in ankle pants, a top, and a cardigan/blazer. Lawyers tend to dress a bit more formally and, if I were you, I’d go the blazer route. There are lots of non-suit blazers at Ann Taylor, H&M, Nordstrom Rack, etc. and even a knit blazer with less structure will read as more formal and a little older (in a good way) than a cardigan.
Anon
I can see why you would gravitate to sweater sets – I think they were one of the go-to looks for the Donna Moss character on The West Wing. I haven’t worked in DC in a while, but if shows like Veep and House of Cards are a good indicator of fashion on the Hill, then it looks like sheath dresses are the look to go for.
anon
Preppy is not about being in, it’s about being preppy! Prep is what it is. If you’re going for preppy, just do it and don’t worry about whether it comports with other current styles.
Anon
I love this comment. That’s all.
Court House wedding
Hello lovely ladies. Can someone help me find a dress for a court house wedding? Must be cotton, linen or silk, no poly (this includes the lining). Knee length or longer. Somewhat fitted. TIA! I’ve been hunting for a few months unsuccessfully. Willing to spend anything really though I’ve generally been searching in the 200-500 range.
Fed Atty
Are you the bride?
Court House wedding
Yes I am! Whoopsie forgot to mention that. Also size 4ish, 5’6 so I fit most standard clothing.
Fed Atty
Congrats! I wore a white cotton sundress from Nordstrom to my own courthouse wedding, and loved it. I found my dress by working with a personal shopper, but if you go to the Nordstrom dress section online, you can filter by color and fabric and see a bunch of options.
Rainbow Hair
What’s your style?
Sleeves required?
OK with strapless?
White only, or ivory and other pale colors OK? Or anything goes?
Court House wedding
I’d say my style skews classic and tailored. Not a fan of bedazzling. Sleeves are not required. OK with strapless. Open to white, ivory, light blue, lilac, and light pink.
Rainbow Hair
I like this mod thingie, but it might be too funky: https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/theory-belted-mod-dress/4855344?origin=category-personalizedsort&fashioncolor=IVORY
Rainbow Hair
This (100% cotton) would be cuteAF in the summer: https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/eliza-j-mandarin-collar-shift-dress/4616605?origin=category-personalizedsort&fashioncolor=WHITE
Rainbow Hair
Also cute and summery (linen and cotton): https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/moon-river-cotton-linen-ballerina-midi-dress/4811123?origin=category-personalizedsort&fashioncolor=WHITE
Rainbow Hair
Look at this crisp cuteness! https://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main/ProductDetail.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374306418059&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524447213308&
Rainbow Hair
More summery cuteness: https://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main/ProductDetail.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374306418059&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524447196852&R=716454314364
Anon
I loooove Reformation for courthouse/alternative wedding dresses. What about this one –
https://www.thereformation.com/products/siena-dress?color=Ivory&
Court House wedding
That is beautiful. Hopefully they have a good return policy so I can get the sizing right!
Rainbow Hair
Want to help me with some silly logistics?
I’m going to be in NYC for a day, with my husband and three year old. (Most of the trip will be in the Hudson Valley.) We’re flying out of JFK at the crack of dawn, so we are planning to stay at a hotel by the airport. So we can get a ride to the city on that day, but what do we do with our STUFF during the day? Just carry it around? (Husband is like, “we’ll just pack for all of us in one backpack!” … we’re only there for 5 days but we are attending a somewhat dressy event and we have a three year old! one backpack is just not happening!) Would a hotel let us pay them to hold it if we aren’t staying there? How imposed-upon would you feel if an old friend asked if she could take you out to lunch and then drop her stuff at your midtown office for the day?
Anonymous
Hotel I’m checking out of has always been fine with holding it for the day while I sightsee in the city. Wouldn’t necessarily mention that you are checking in somewhere else because they might want that hotel to hold it.
Rainbow Hair
Oh, but I’m not checking out of a hotel that night — I’m getting a ride into the city from family who lives about a few hour away.
Anon
I know that you’re a very smart and competent woman, but I’m wondering if you have as much time to explore NYC as you think you do. So you leave the Hudson Valley in the morning, get into the city, explore the city, then head out to JFK at a somewhat normal hour so there’s not a total toddler meltdown. That doesn’t leave much time for exploring the city.
I think it’s doable, but I also think the logistics will solve themselves when you make a schedule as to what you’re able to do in the city. If you carry roller suitcases, wherever you eat lunch can probably hold them. You can find one or two tourist attractions wherein you’re able to bring bags with you.
Rainbow Hair
This point is valid — it was my husband’s idea (… … …) and mostly I think he wants to go to our old ‘hood and eat at a particular pizza place. And then when I think, “OK, we’ll eat pizza for lunch then go hang in Riverside Park” suddenly it seems pretty easy to handle with a rolling suitcase.
Anon
“And then when I think, “OK, we’ll eat pizza for lunch then go hang in Riverside Park” suddenly it seems pretty easy to handle with a rolling suitcase.”
:) Exactly.
Anonymous
If you go to a fairly busy midtown hotel, the bag check is not going to have any idea if you are staying there or not. And if they do ask if you’re a guest, just move on to the next place.
If you’re very worried about it, you could also try one of the big department stores. I know Bloomingdales has a coat/package check and the phone number is on the web, so you could call in advance to confirm if a suitcase would be an issue.
Rainbow Hair
Oh thanks for this!
Anonymous
there are many new app-based companies in nyc that have luggage storage throughout the city. I think luggagehero is the main one, but there are also others.
Rainbow Hair
Wow thank you!
Anonymous
I think most hotels won’t mind doing this for you even if you’re not a guest. Maybe call somewhere near where you plan to hang out to okay it.
If I were the friend I wouldn’t mind but it may be inconvenient for you to retrieve, depending where you’ll be.
Are you planning to visit any museums–you can always leave it in coat check.
Think about your starting/drop off point & where you’ll end up +how much time you’ll wander after lunch/before hotel & where you want to go. + How you’re getting to the hotel. That will help figure out where leaving stuff makes most sense.
Definitely pack everything in one roller; with 2 adults + one toddler + a dressy event that’s way too much stuff for a backpack. Even a hiking one.
Cornellian
If you post a burner email and I’m in the office that day you can definitely leave stuff in my midtown office.
Cornellian
I’ll try to remember to check back tomorrow.
Rainbow Hair
Oh wow, thank you! I’m my name with and this s!te’s suffix at google’s mail platform.
Cornellian
I think there’s something missing above. with what??
Rainbow Hair
rainbow hair e t t e at google? i’m so scared of getting modded.
Anonymous
there are many new app-based companies in nyc that have luggage storage throughout the city. I think luggagehero is the main one, but there are also others.
Question- lupus
A friend of mine at work is having a hard time with her chronic illness (lupus). She has little appetite. I want to send her flowers or something but I recognize that scented items might not be rather welcomed.
Any other ideas for something to send over?