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For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional.
If you've been hunting for either a gray skirt suit on sale — or a chance to own a Burberry suit — this just might be your chance. The Outnet has lucky sizes (but a fair amount) left of the blazer, which was $2190 but is now marked to $1204; this skirt is different than the one pictured on the model but looks like a good match. (These pants might also be a closer look if you're interested in the blazer.)
Hunting for something similar but more affordable? Ann Taylor has a houndstooth knit suiting collection with a skirt, and this drapey flannel pantsuit at J.Crew is similar as well. If you like the look of the gray knit for separates, both Joie and Loft have cute blazers, and J.McLaughlin has a cute skirt. This Target knit blazer in regular and plus sizes also might be worth a try (it looks nicer in the buyer pictures than on the model).
This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!
Sales of note for 9.10.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Save up to 40% on new markdowns
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- White House Black Market – 30% off new arrivals
anon
I really need help on public speaking/presenting. I have a soft voice and speak to quickly, then get ahead of myself and sound unsure when I don’t know what to say next. I feel like it’s really bad. I do enough of it at work but I really need to get better faster than I am. Any suggestions?
Anon
Honestly, become a lay reader at a church. Or do toastmasters.
Anonymous
I am a lay reader and don’t think reading helps with public speaking much beyond learning to slow down and speak up and be comfortable in front of people. You aren’t speaking off the cuff or articulating your own ideas.
Anon
Those are pretty big aspects of public speaking, though!
Anne-on
+1 to toastmasters. Also (and this is SUPER uncomfy) but if you want to do this yourself at home I’d set up your phone, film yourself doing a talk off slides you know well, watch it, note the points you want to focus on, and then do it over (and over) again. I’ve done many a media training and that’s the first step – seeing people’s baseline, assesing their issues, trying to correct for one or two at a time, recording again, etc.
Anonymous
+1 to toastmasters. Also (and this is SUPER uncomfy) but if you want to do this yourself at home I’d set up your phone, film yourself doing a talk off slides you know well, watch it, note the points you want to focus on, and then do it over (and over) again. I’ve done many a media training and that’s the first step – seeing people’s baseline, assesing their issues, trying to correct for one or two at a time, recording again, etc.
Anon
During COVID, my kids had to work on a merit badge (Communications? Public Speaking?) at home. We did a lot of pulling up semi-emotive speeches and poems and reading them (the short ones they could do from memory) and filming it. There is no way to the other side except through it, but if you pick one thing and try it every day, you will improve from where you start. It helps if you aren’t reading, but it’s OK to start with that. Gettysburg Address is short. Or a sonnet. Or lyrics to a song (one kid like to speak the lyrics to Jolene). But you can pull that up on the google those and see the requirements — if they are good for kids, they wouldn’t be bad for most adults wanting to improve.
Naomi
I basically fixed my public speaking issues this way as a young adult, when other techniques adults in my life had tried didn’t work. I had a small recorder at one point, but then jut used my phone. I memorized and then practiced reciting mainly poetry, but the songs or speeches you mention would definitely work too. Invictus, Citizenship in a Republic, Still I Rise, The Raven, etc
Anonymous
I am starting to do public speaking on behalf of a nonprofit I’m associated with in the last year and I am really excited to try this technique. I think I get nervous for the sake of being nervous, not because of anything I’m going to say.
Wheels
Find a good presentation skills course in your city. It’s worth it.
Senior Attorney
+1
My law firm paid for me to do one of these about 30 years ago and I still use some of the things I learned.
EB
I feel that paying a consultant or going to toastmasters would be a very effective way to get better quickly and to gain confidence. I’ve always wanted to do that, but instead just struggled through being not very good at first! If you’re like me, the thing that helped me the most was being really comfortable with my material. Practicing all the way through several times helps, as does just generally knowing the material you’re teaching backwards and forwards. It’s really hard to make a joke or tell a story off the cuff, when you’re trying to remember your next line.
Something that helps me internally is remembering that everyone there wants you to succeed and no one is against you, so I pretend I’m talking to all my friends when I’m up on stage.
Finally, F virtual presentations. I think presenting over zoom is the worst thing ever and hate it because you can’t see your audience. I’m right about at turning virtual opportunities down, as it’s no fun.
Hypatia
I took a public speaking workshop this year. The most important take-away was that while we might think presenting is all a mindset thing, it is actually about the body. Relaxing the body translates to being able to present without overwhelming nervousness, and paying attention to body language can make you a more effective presenter.
I learned a few things: 1. enter and exit strong. You want to walk up/in to the speaking spot confidently, looking at the audience. You want to exit with confidence as well. 2. Practice posture and breathing techniques. Previously, I noticed I used to ‘pace in place’ and shift my weight a lot while presenting. Now, I tend to stand still, focusing on looking at different people in the audience and breathing evenly. Another idea was to have a ‘default pose’ you could find when you get overwhelmed. For example, I stand with my weight on my left leg, right leg slightly to the side, and have my hands in a V at my middle (a la Angela Merkel). 3. Practice your voice. Volume, speed, inflection, variability. We had some exercises where we would practice our talk a. as fast as we could b. as slow as we could c. loudly – booming just below shouting d. with random volume variability. Sounds silly but found this very effective.
We learned some techniques from Alexander Technique – I bet that would be on youtube
Anon
I don’t like light heather gray for anything. It just reads high school gym sweatpants to me.
Cat
yeah, this outfit got confused. Burberry, the goal is “sweatpants that look like a real suit,” NOT “a suit that looks like sweatpants.”
Vicky Austin
Same. Even dark heather gray sometimes edges too close to this territory for me.
Vicky Austin
The skirt on this reads even more sweatpantsy than the blazer, and to me the idea of a sweatskirt feels utterly cursed.
Anon
I’m sure it’s nice in person, but they have lost their minds on that blouse.
pugsnbourbon
I actually love it – tho it cracks me up that it’s over $2k on sale.
When we lived in DC my wife got caught in one of those summer afternoon downpours. Unaware that Burberry is designer, she ducked into one of their stores because she saw umbrellas in the window. She picked one up, looked at the price tag, made eye contact with the salesperson and immediately left.
pugsnbourbon
*over $1k on sale
Anon
I feel like those cuffs are ridiculous. Like, you can’t be a woman who actually wants to get anything done wearing those.
Anonymous
They would never suggest to a man that he wear such a thing, particularly as business attire. That sort of decoration does not belong with a suit.
Anon
I was looking at capes and found some (wool!) that I liked at Great Scott. Has anyone ever gotten things from them before? It looks to be a traditional kilt-and-ruana place with tartans of various clans (I’m not even sure if we are Scottish or just have a last name that is vaguely from either England or Scotland). I like fashion capes, but they are never warm enough but these look like they would work well with my perpetual winter turtlenecks.
Headshot
For a b&w headshot, is it too much to do all black? I’m high contrast (pale skin, dark hair and eyes) and have to get a headshot soon but none of my old professional clothes fit as well as they used to. I work in a casual industry and don’t want to go buy new professional clothes if a basic black top will do.
Anon
You can wear black if you like but I suggest something lighter between your neckline and your face, like pearls.
Anon
I feel like with your coloring, the answer is yes.
FWIW, I did a quick photo session last year and my kids were crabby and not playing along. We all wore random crappy joggers and sneakers but changed into black uniqlo turtlenecks and crew neck shirts. They were lovely (and we got a comic full-length one). Everyone crops to faces, and the less noise around a face, the better. Black isn’t for everyone, but it should be just fine for you.
Anonymous
+1. If you are high contrast, then black is probably the very best choice for a b&w photo. I disagree with the suggestion above to put some white near your face; as a high-contrast, cool-toned Winter, I look most dramatic and vibrant in all black.
Wheels
Probably fine but check the colour of the backdrop to make sure you won’t be a floating head.
Anonymous
Does black look good on you? As long as it doesn’t wash you out, you’re fine.
If you are one of the people who gets subtle undereye bags and a little bit of a tired look tired while wearing black, you’ll look more tired in a b&w photo.
A
Wear black, add pearls, no patterns. And maybe do eyeliner or something that stands out in b&w.
test run
Hopefully frivolous afternoon question: I’m recruiting an admin and, since I don’t currently have one, am corresponding with candidates to schedule interviews, etc. I keep running into an issue where I’ll say, “I’m free between 1-3pm – is there a time there that works for you for a 30 minute interview?” and they respond and say, “Yes, I’m free at 3pm.” Is how I’m phrasing this not fairly standard? And if I’m interviewing someone whose main job is scheduling… is it a bad sign that they’re not familiar with this? Obviously not a major deal I just thought it was funny as it’s now happened to me twice in the past week and I realized, maybe I’m the outlier!
AnonATL
To me, if someone says free between x and y I assume y is the last time I can schedule.
Anne-on
+1 – I’ve seen people use it both ways – I also avoid bi-monthly for this reason – I’ve seen people use it to mean every other month OR twice a month. I now just say ‘I’m free between 1-2:30 with a hard stop at 3pm (or whenever it is).
Anon
Bi means every other and semi means twice. So bimonthly = every other monthly and semi-monthly = twice a month. But many many people don’t know this.
Unsub
According to Merriam-Webster, bimonthly means both “occurring every two months” AND “occurring twice a month.“
Anonymous
I realize I’m shaking my fist at a cloud here but “bi” means twice – it comes from the Latin word “bis”. If English were logical bimonthly *would* mean twice-monthly.
Sybil
I think it’s standard, but there was a similar question on here recently so I guess I’m an outlier too. Someone on that thread suggested adding something like “hard stop at 3:00.”
Vicky Austin
That does seem weird, but maybe it would be more obvious if you said, “I’m free from 1pm until 3pm”?
IDK either. When offered a time range, I always go to the earlier side cause who knows what commitments people have! I don’t think it’s you.
JTM
I think it comes down to how people think of the phrase “available between 1pm and 3pm”. Some people take that to mean that the latest you can meet is 3pm, which I’m assuming your candidates are doing. If the latest you can start an interview is 230pm because you have a hard stop at 3pm, I’d say “between 1pm and 230pm”.
Also Calendly takes away this issue entirely – you can just send them your Calendly link & they can see the time slots you have available and then select one. That might cut down on the confusion.
Anonymous
I have learned that I have to be crystal clear about this, both when I offer available times and when I respond to others’ availability. If I’m offering up times, my language is “I can connect beginning between 1pm and 2:30pm, ending our conversation no later than 3pm.”
Cat
The way you phrased it is a no-brainer to me that your entire window of availability is between 1 and 3 pm.
test run
That’s what I thought! But reading the responses here, I’m realizing that it’s not as obvious/clear cut as I thought it was. To anon at 2:14’s point, I’ll have to be more crystal clear about this in the future.
pugsnbourbon
Me too! Now I know to be more careful about this in the future.
Cat
I have never once said “I’m open between 1-3 on Tuesday” and gotten an invite for a 3pm start time – so it’s surprising to me that others have even encountered this issue!
Anon
Same!
PLB
To me as well.
Anon
It’s your phrasing. I recently got hired after a lot of interviewing, and when I said “between 2 pm and 5 pm,” I got a lot of 5 pm interviews. Just note the distinction between start time and stop time – “I have a hard stop at” is good language.
NYCer
I think it is a bit vague. If you truly have a hard stop at 3:00 pm, I think I would say something like we can schedule the interview to begin between 1:00 and 2:30 pm. It should last 30 minutes.
Anon
+1 I schedule a ton of 30 minute meetings and this is how I phrase it.
test run
This is great phrasing – I’m going to steal it. Thanks!
Anon
The way you wrote it seems completely clear to me! In this case you’ve made clear that it’s a 30 minute interview, but people often don’t specify how long they want to meet, so it’s much easier to say you’re free between 1 and 3 than guess at different meeting times. If you were to follow the alternate interpretation, you’re only available between 1 and 2 for an hour interview, but 1 and 2:45 if could be done in 15 minutes. That just seems excessively confusing.
Anon
Ditto others that it’s clear to me, but I schedule things with outside parties a lot in my job, so I often do things like, “We’re available at 1:00, 1:30, 2:00, and 2:30 on Wednesday if any of those times work for you. If not, we’re also available…” just to be explicit.
Anonymous
You are right and they are wrong. Free from 1 to 3 means exactly that. At 3 you are no longer free and the meeting must end by that time.
Anon
Agree. I have worked as an admin doing heavy scheduling for multiple execs and anyone who mixed this sort of thing up due to anything other than a simple brain fart was not suited to such a role.
Anonymous
This seems like a good screening test. If you say I’m free from 1 to 3 and they suggest meeting at 3, they obviously don’t understand standard business communication and are going to create headaches for you if hired.
Anon
Agree with this being a good screener. If reading between the lines on something regarding scheduling is too hard for them, then I would not think they’d be the kind of admin that can “hurdle uncertainty” and just get stuff off my plate without tons of confusion. NEXT!
Anon318
Paging Anonymous planning a weekend getaway with her husband…
I posted a long-winded recommendation for Tampa at the very end of today’s Workwear Report, but it didn’t come out of mod until after this post went up. Have a great trip wherever you end up choosing!
Anon
Americans, is a $5000 facility fee of which my insurance wants me to pay a $2000+ copay pretty par for the course for a colonoscopy screening? (I realize that preventive colonoscopies can become diagnostic if they find anything, in which case other copays may apply, but this is what I’m being told for a screening alone — and it’s at a free standing surgical “LCC,” not a hospital even though it has a hospital affiliation, so it just all seems steep!) Obviously I’m new to this, but is this what everyone is paying every ten years?
Anon
I won’t say that’s impossible (because anything is possible with health insurance here) but I don’t think that’s standard, no. My colonoscopies are free under a high deductible health plan because it’s preventative care.
Anonymous
Are you high risk or over 45? Under 45 they are not typically covered as preventative.
Anon
I am over 45.
Anonymous
Insurance is so all over the place with this type of thing, so it’s hard to gauge. $5,000 for the facility fee (which is a surgical center, including recovery area and multiple staffers) doesn’t seem out of line.
Anon
No. Screening colonoscopies should be free, and diagnostic ones will vary depending on your insurance. I had a diagnostic colonoscopy a few months ago and paid nothing, my insurance paid $1007. This was at an ambulatory surgical center attached to my regular doctor’s office (VHCOL area, if it matters).
Anon
So they want me to pay more for just a facility fee copay than your insurance paid for your entire diagnostic procedure? That does make me feel like I’m being overcharged.
Anonymous
No. I admittedly have very good insurance, but I’m paying more like a $20-50 copay. Is the dr/facility out of network or something?
Anon
It’s in network. My insurance covers 100% of everything else, but has this $2300 “copay” for any facility fee charged.
A little Googling revealed that the healthcare system (Atrium Health Charlotte) has made some headlines for its spendy colonoscopies, so maybe I can do better by calling around.
Anonymous
Shop around. That seems absurd. I’d even shop around in other nearby cities and it might be cheaper. Winston-Salem’s not far and I’ve got to think a facility fee would be cheaper there.
Anonymous
$5,000 seems crazy high. Like, you’re getting scammed high. Did they ask you to wire the payment to Nigeria? Do not pay that.
Anon
Screening colonoscopies are supposed to be free under the ACA.
Anon
I mean, the colonoscopy is free. It’s the facility fee that’s so expensive, which is being billed separately.
Anonymous
Isn’t the facility fee supposed to be covered too?
Anon
The insurance company is explaining that even if the facility fee is only $900 (I found a cheaper place), the $2350 copay is unavoidable. It does sound like it’s being billed as a diagnostic because of a previous test result. Oh well!
anon
yeah but unless you can opt out of the facility part, that’s bs. Like, the flight is free but the seat reservation is $500, and no, you may not stand during the flight.
Anon
I’m honestly confused as to what a copay even is now. I thought it was my contribution towards a portion of a bill.
But if the endoscopy center’s facility fee is less than my facility fee copay, who even gets the money?
But the insurer was explicit that under no circumstances would I ever pay less than the copay. I guess the provider must just bill me for the facility fee copay in accord with my insurance even if it’s a higher amount than their actual facility fee.
Anonymous
That just seems wrong. I would call back and try to speak to someone else or a manager. Paying more than the actual fee for a “copay” doesn’t make sense.
Anon
Unfortunately, reading more about this, it looks like facility fees may be a kind of shady loophole for the ACA requirement even when a colonoscopy is coded as a screening. Sigh.
Anon
How GI docs make their real money is by owning these “surgical centers” which are often outside of health insurance networks.
I’d shop around if I were you.
anon
I think colonoscopy is only free for adults of a certain age (seniors?) I got one last year as someone in her 30s and had to pay my high deductible, and then insurance kicks in to cover the rest at whatever the split is, 80/20 or 90/10. But no, I didn’t pay 2k facility fee. That seems really high. Is that separate from the cost of the procedure itself?
Anon
Middle aged, not seniors. It’s free if you’re 45 and have no risk factors because that’s the recommended age to start screening. The age can be lower if you have risk factors. But if you’re getting one because you have symptoms that’s not a screening test and might not be covered.
Clementine
Late to the game here, but a big issue that’s happening right now is that practice groups are adding these ‘facility fees’ as moneymakers. Previously, they were billing for the service, but there’s this grey area where they’re able to bill for the facility fee.
You should call your insurance company and dispute the fixed dollar copay as it exceeds the charge of the service being provided.
Anon
Thanks for the context. I was surprised and not sure what to think. I will call around a little more and push back on this if it’s not adding up.
Curious
To whomever recommended The Curated Closet: thank you! In one hour I’ve already been able to see what my core frustrations with my wardrobe are and why my exasperated impulse purchases aren’t solving them.
Anonymous
Is this a book? Video?
Curious
Book! Got it from the library. It’s basically a decorated vision, current state, gap analysis, strategy sesh but for your wardrobe.
Anonymous
Intriguing! What did it show you—where were you going wrong?
Curious
I was mad at my shoes and pants, so I was buying new shoes and pants, but I hadn’t specified what was actually wrong with them (shoes were a little too casual; pants were saggy), so I was duplicating the same issues or creating odd new ones. I realized I like mid-rise cigarette pants and will probably stick with that silhouette much more, maximum going straight leg, but not wide cuts, and I’ll keep my soft fabrics (e.g., ponte) but possibly go up one price point. The level of specificity I got to quickly was really nice. Note: she wants you to photograph your outfits for two weeks to start. I didn’t, just used 14 days of photos of me in clothes, so that made it faster.
Anon
Will check this out. I seem to be very good at shopping for cute clothes for when it’s 80 degrees out. Which is not how life is — I do not apparently live in San Diego but my closet does.
Curious
I can only shop for fall 😂.
Anon
Sooo how much money do you set aside for house related expenses? We just had two (potentially three) emergency/need to fix before they turn into a big big problem issues that have cost us a lot of money. I read somewhere people should set aside x% of their house price each year for these issues. Has this been the case for you?
We are new homeowners and I knew there would be problems but yikes wasn’t prepared for all of it to happen at once!
brokentoe
So very dependent upon the age and condition of the home. Did you have a home inspection when you purchased your house? Often the reports you receive will flag potential expenses you may have down the road. Sadly, furnaces, AC, water heaters, roofs, windows, etc. can all be expected replacements at some point. Welcome to the joy$$ of home ownership!
Anon8
The number I heard was 1% of your homes value per year. So if the house value is $500,000, you’d set aside $5,000 per year for maintenance and repairs. YMMV, obviously.
Senior Attorney
I’d say that’s the bare minimum. Something like a roof is going to be multiples of that.
Anon
I’ve heard this quoted a lot, but as a counterpoint we bought a then 15 year old house for $400k almost 10 years ago and have never come close to spending $4,000/year on maintenance, let alone 1% of the home’s current $900k value. Most years we spend in the neighborhood of $1k. There was one year we needed a new furnace and that year we probably spent $2-3k. At some point in the next decade we’ll probably have to replace the roof and that’s a big expense, but that’s (hopefully) a once-in-20-years thing.
Anonymous
Sort of depends on your house and area.
We have a 3800sq fT home built in 1960 in New England. Every year we spend $10-20k on *something* be it a reno or an unplanned expense. I think the purchase price is somewhat irrelevant (we bought it for $650k, did $250k of reno and it’s market value today is $1.3M; we spend the same annually regardless of market value). Examples of expenses over the past 8 years we’ve been in the house:
– $20k in new windows (optional, but eventually had to be done)
– $12k new roof (we knew the roof was nearing the end of life when we bought, not a surprise). This is every 20-30 years.
– $10k fence ( we got a dog, again, a known expense we could have slippers/deferred).
– new kitchen appliances when all the ones in the house went within a garage of moving in (~$5k)- the oven went, then the DW then we just did the rest to match
– $12k painting the house & repairing rot. This is a 5-6ish year thing.
– $16k to add/totally re do our AC ($10k of this was included as a consession when we bought)
– $30k to put in a new patio (total nice to have)
– $5k to replace the boiler when it went (totally unexpected)
– Id budget $1-2k/year in misc emergency repairs- plumbing, electrical, whatever. A plumber charges $80 just to come out then $150/hr for a 2 person crew + parts. Our shower leaked one year and it was $1k.
We just re-did a bathroom and for a cosmetic only upgrade we spent over $5k and did a lot of the work ourselves.
Anon
I don’t have a set aside for house expenses but I save $2k a month that goes into a savings account that funds any emergency or vacation.
I spent $19k on my 1950s era house this year bc I had to replace all of the sewer line outside my house (I thought I had insurance, alas, it was just waterline insurance) and $3500 for a repair that was related to the shoddy job the flippers did not the age if the house.
Every other year I have owned a house (13 years – 2 houses) it has been more like $1-3k. But I also haven’t had to replace a roof or HVAC, etc.
Anon
To add, I put the sewer line on my Amex then immediately moved it to a new 0% APR transfer card that I don’t even carry in my wallet/never use so I can pay in chunks over a year instead of taking a huge chunk from savings even though I had it. Cut a check for the other repair.
Vicky Austin
Not sure what the numerical wisdom is on this, but when my husband and I moved into our first house, the gas line was improperly hooked up, the plumbing blew up literally in my husband’s face, and we found black mold in the bathroom wall – all within the first two months. Maybe stringing a house along for resale means once it finally lands in the buyer’s hands, it relaxes and unloads everything on you!
pugsnbourbon
I’d do some research on the cost of a replacement furnace/AC system and keep that amount as a repair fund. Those go out at either the hottest or coldest part of the year and you’ll want to get it fixed asap.
Anon
This is basically our strategy. We try to keep about $15k to $20k in an immediately-accessible savings account. We do not pull from it for expected or planned expenses, just leave it there for catastrophe situations. Those might be house issues, car problems, unanticipated medical bills, stuff like that. If we do have to dip into it we try to reload as soon as feasible. Took us a a long time to be able to build that cushion but it has been really good for peace of mind ever since.
Anon
We don’t earmark money for home expenses. We have a slush fund/emergency account that we aim to keep stocked with about $20k in cash. If we have to dip into that for a bigger home repair we cut back on fun stuff for a bit until it’s rebuilt. I think old houses and brand new houses that haven’t settled generally have more issues? My house was middle of the road in terms of age (15 years old when we bought it, now almost 25 years old) and we have not had to spend much on it – around $1,000/year, which is mostly preventative maintenance like semi-annual heating and cooking tune-ups, and appliance repairs (our dishwasher is a money pit). For context, my home was $400k when we bought it, and is now worth $900k according to Zillow, so way below the 1% mark. I’m not sure I believe that maintenance costs are directly tied to home value – of course in a LCOL area repairs will be cheaper than in a HCOL one, but many if not most homes have gained a huge amount of value in the last decade, and while home repair costs have increased due to inflation they haven’t doubled or tripled like home values have. We’re lucky to have a good handyman who fixes anything small and rarely accepts more than $50 even though we try to pay him more. The roof is definitely the biggest one time expense most homeowners will have, but that’s a very rare (once every 20 or 30 years) thing for most houses. We will probably start trying to bulk up the emergency fund a bit in the next few years in anticipation of that. We want to install solar shingles, so it’s going to cost quite a bit more than a normal roof.
If big stuff is popping up immediately after you bought the house, that sounds like a problem with the inspection. I’d reach out to your real estate agent to see if s/he thinks this is normal. They have a lot of experience with this.
Anonymous
Hi, I have a some co workers who have worked very closely with my team for many years who were impacted by Hurricane Ian. Some have lost their homes and belongings and are just starting to think about rebuilding. I would like to do something for them but am struggling with what would be most helpful. Restaurant gift cards seemed like a good idea, but I will need to research which restaurants are still/will be functioning. I feel very compelled and want to help, but i could use some suggestions on what would be best. If any of you have ideas to pass along, I would appreciate it.
Anon
Maybe this is gauche, but maybe a Visa giftcard or some other cash equivalent would be more helpful.
Anonymous
Cash. They need cash. In the form of a visa gift card.
Anon
Cash. Or a Target or Home Depot gift card.
Anon
Walmart gift card. Or Target or cash. This is very nice of you! I live in Nola and have been impacted by hurricanes so I know this would be appreciated.
Anon
Quiet day today. Low drama or is everyone buried at work?
Anonymous
It’s a holiday
Anon
Only about 2% of the population celebrates. It is hugely important for them, but doesn’t impact most offices in most cities.
Anon
In areas with a larger Jewish population (NYC, western suburbs of Boston, LA, north shore of Chicago) most schools are closed today so there are plenty of non-Jewish parents are taking the day off because their kids are home.
Anon
Yom Kippur.
AIMS
It’s Yom Kippur, which is a holy day for some people and also a school holiday in places like NYC.
NYCer
Today is Yom Kippur. At least in NYC, most schools have the day off and many offices are quite empty (mine included). I am one of a handful of people in my department working today.
Anon
And then there’s my job in the Midwest that had a huge and really important event today. I’m not very observant and most of the time I don’t mind being the only Jew around but it kind of stings to be reminded that there are places like NYC where people actually know about and acknowledge major Jewish holidays.
Clementine
In the Northeast, it’s Yom Kippur, in the midwest it’s Fall Break.
Anon
Jewish Midwesterner here. It’s a little early for fall break and that normally doesn’t fall on a Wednesday. Most schools in these parts do a three or four day weekend around (what used to be?) Columbus Day, which is not until next Monday and schools that don’t do Columbus Day usually do later, not earlier. Our school’s fall break is the 14th-17th this year. I think to the extent there’s a reason it’s quiet, it’s the holiday. But also it doesn’t seem that quiet to me? 100 comments on the afternoon thread is pretty average I think.
Vicky Austin
Got recommended this on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/Ci-iDX8ODxB/?igshid=MDE2OWE1N2Q=
Anon
I like the ball in the box analogy a lot better. I don’t think it ever turns into a yummy croissant.
Anon
Agree
eertmeert
That’s a nice sentiment and I hope it helps people to find peace. Personally, I find it misleading. Grief doesn’t undergo a magical transformation over time into something pleasant.
My grief over losing my beloved father a few years ago doesn’t feel okay and will never feel okay. It is integrated by now, I get more used to its presence, so the edges soften and it is a bit easier to carry from day to day. I create rituals to honor him and his memory in my daily life and keep his memory close. I actively engage with the loss so that it does not smack me in the face unexpectantly quite as often. Same for my friend and her grief over losing her mother. For her it gets worse with time because her mother isn’t there to spend time with her grandchildren and be a part of their lives. My friend feels the loss sharper now, although in a different way than years ago in the initial grief period.
It’s much more like a limb amputation than anything else. A piece of my life is gone, and like an amputated appendage I will never get it back. It is painful and cumbersome, but I can still do my daily life and become as adjusted as possible to the new circumstances. There are flare ups and issues related to the loss, but I create more tools to deal with them. And sometimes the empty space where my dad used to sit, or the inability to call him and tell him good news, or ask his advice, or play a new board game or go to a new restaurant or celebrate birthdays is just the saddest, emptiest space that can never be filled again and I have to live with it.
anon
I read a thing saying that grief doesn’t go away or get smaller, but ideally, your life grows around it. DH recently lost a parent and said he liked that one.
Anon
I’m confused right now because another loss brought back the previous ones like they happened yesterday.
Anne-on
Houndstooth blazer – trendy or classic? In particular, this one? I’m thinking it’ll be handy to throw on over solid turtlenecks/shells in the winter when I tend to wear more black.
https://www.brooksbrothers.com/wool-houndstooth-riding-jacket/WJ00426.html?dwvar_WJ00426_Color=BLKM
Thank you to whoever called out that she specifically bought patterned blazers as they were easier to wear without looking like you were trying to break up your suit (which is precisely why I have a hard time with so many of my solid wool blazers!)
AIMS
Classic but that particular one feels a little less current. J Crew has some good ones right now that read a bit more modern.
Anonymous
Classic, as long as you buy a classic shape rather than what is currently trending.
Sasha
I’m probably thinking about this too hard but how crucial is a 2nd bathroom in a 2 bed condo? I’m starting a house search right now and have only been looking at 2bd/1.5+ba, but did a search for 2bd/1ba out of curiosity and was surprised at the price difference. It’ll just be me in the place for the foreseeable future so that’s fine for now, but I’m wondering if that’ll make the place less attractive for resale or renting in the future
Duckles
I don’t think a second full bath in necessary in a 2 bedroom. I lived in a 2/2 with my ex and we literally never used the second shower. Note I almost bought a 1500sf house that only had 1.5 and had been on the market for a few months because most families need at least two full bathrooms. Ultimately bought a smaller house that’s 1.5 and I think it’ll be less of an issue, because it’s more likely it’ll be another single person/couple with baby moving into somewhere this small (though, it was rented to three college students before I moved in, but they’re not picky…). I like having the .5 because it takes the pressure off me to keep my main bathroom clean when I have company over. I considered converting the .5 into a .75 by giving up some master bedroom closet space, but didn’t since I’ll (single) really never use it.