Coffee Break: Dream Lip Oil
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I'm still working on my bigger review of Amazon Prime Day… but in the meantime, do note that one of my favorite lip oils is in the sale, with a LOT of colors avialable for almost 30% off.
Summer Fridays lip oils are moisturizing, not sticky, and have a light vanilla flavor… if you want it to be more like a lip tint I'd suggest going for the darker colors because the lighter ones are very subtle.
There are eight different colors available at Amazon, all marked down.
Sales of note for 10/2:
- Nordstrom – Extra 20% off clearance! I rounded up my top picks on the Weekend Open Thread – lots of Veronica Beard and more on DEEP discounts (lucky sizes only)
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your full price purchase, plus deal of the day: 10/2: 40% off wear-now styles
- J.Crew – 3100+ items in sale
- J.Crew Factory – 50% off all sweaters and pants
- M.M.LaFleur – Lots of blues and reds in the sale section. (Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off on other items)
- Nordstrom Rack – Extra 40% off select clearance
- Old Navy – The Old Navy x Altuzarra collab is in! All sizes (up to 4X!) of the blazer in the collab is still available, and it is eligible for today's Super Cash offer
- Talbots – 40% off one item, 30% off everything else
- Theory – End of season sale is on!
Passport wait time anecdata for anyone interested!
Last week I helped my mom renew her passport online. We submitted the renewal on the evening of Monday 9/28. We did not pay to expedite and she doesn’t have any international trips coming up. She received her new passport YESTERDAY 10/5 exactly one week later.
Wow, so this is where the efficiency has been hiding!
I’m about to start a renovation of a fairly basic rectangular bathroom for my kids, replacing a pedestal sink with a proper vanity (prob 48 “, one sink) and updating the dingy 90s beige tile as primary motivators. Everything is getting redone, though.
I’d like it to be classic/timeless and not trendy. Where do you get your inspo? This is not my strength.
I can be talked out of any of this but thinking Wayfair’s Merola Tile Metro Hex floor tile, Avanity Brentwood for the vanity. What goes on the walls of the shower/tub? I have polished brass in my 2022 renovated master bath, but thinking not brass or black – I think they’ll look dated in due time. Door hardware is black and that’s not changing. Polished nickel? What would age well? Helpppp.
Natural materials, a style that matches the rest of your home, and functional features tend to age best. I think polished nickel would look great with that tile and vanity. The mirror should be traditional as well, not an LED monstrosity. Horizontal subway tile in the shower goes with the floor you chose. Introduce some color with the shower curtain and bathmat.
Lord. Wrong place. I’ll try again tomorrow 🥴
I got mine in January. Same!!
meanwhile my drivers license is expired and I cannot even request a status until 45 days after my online renewal. it’s only been 22 days. happy freaking birthday to me.
I wonder if some of the conflict and abrasiveness in the comments has driven commenters away. I miss the days of 300+ comments with interesting life quandaries and some thoughtful responses. I recently asked an innocuous fashion question and can attest that at least one of the responses was inexplicably harsh (e.g., of course, that style of top is fine–what is wrong with you for asking?) though there there are still some thoughtful responses.
I miss the 300+ comments per post days too! I think of that a lot.
…but do we miss EIIen?
There were several posts in late September that got near 300. The afternoon thread has always been much lighter than the morning thread. I think it has less to do with changes in the tone here, and more to do with normal seasonal fluctuations. This coming weekend is a holiday for many in both the US and Canada and K-12 schools are heading into fall break season, which means a lot of parents are out of the office on PTO. Fewer people in the office always equates to fewer comments here.
I’m traveling tomorrow to care for a family member having thyroid surgery. If any of have had it (or cared for people who did), please share your pro tips. What were you able to eat? What made you feel more comfortable while you recovered? Was there any issue or pain you weren’t prepared for? TIA!
My 70-something dad had his thyroid removed a few years ago. It was not a huge deal. I think he ate soft foods the same day he came from the hospital and was eating pretty much normally by the next day. He was very hoarse for a week or so but his voice gradually returned to normal. He said the pain was manageable.
any other gardeners out there? are you stressed out about the end of the season also?
yes, out here, but no – I enjoy the break! Some fall pruning, seed-gathering, and planting… and then done until spring.
We had a very hot, dry summer and I’m just kind of over it at this point. I need to harvest my sweet potatoes and pull up all my summer veggies and just haven’t had time. I planted some broccoli and brussel sprouts for Fall and was going to do lettuce but am probably just going to give up and leave the garden to its own devices until Spring.
Not really. My garden is still lush and beautiful, and has reached the autopilot stage. Around Halloween I start to get forlorn. I am a beginner gardener so I am learning, and get confused every late fall about what to cut down and what to leave for spring.
I am still harvesting lettuce, basil, cilantro, chard, beets and butternut squash. My dahlias are gorgeous, and my zinnias and cosmos are in their prime. Rose of Sharons are still blooming, and some anemone are about to open. I even have a lovely deep red iris that is decided to bloom now (!) and the first flower of 7 has opened. My red amaranth is just an amazing monster and I love it.
The only thing I have cut down is the full peonie that always looks bad by now, and I planted mums, cilantro, and some clemantis seedlings to fill the space, while preserving the roots. I am getting ready to plant some bulbs around the base of my baby redbud tree once they arrive. Ordering bulbs is the only thing I have done lately other than deadheading. Deadheading is my meditation.
This whole comment makes me want to be a gardener.
thank you to everyone who offered suggestions! I ordered the most amazing white tshirt. the fit is loose, but good on my chest; sleeves are long enough, but not to voluminous; weight is perfect and not see through!
https://www.aritzia.com/us/en/product/interlock-cotton-function-t-shirt/124059.html?color=1275
thanks!
Glad you found a good one. Thanks for the link!
I was just glancing at their Tshirts and love their long sleeved version with a flared cuff. I am going to try it when its back in stock.
I sprained my right ankle for the second time in two years last week when the hem of my trendy pants got stuck on the bottom of my trendy shoes and I tumbled down stairs. Injuries stink, and this could’ve been so much worse, but I live alone in a 3rd floor walk-up in a building with less than helpful neighbors and in a city where I don’t have much community, so this is hard. I’ve done a lot of crying while trying to hobble around and care for my ankle as best as I can. Later this week, family is flying in to scoop me up, help me leave the building, and take me to their city where I can see a doctor and take the time I need to recover. Thank goodness I can work remotely. This injury is worse than the last, and I’m eager to be seen and treated and be with people.
During my necessary downtime I’ve scrolled real estate thinking about trading up for an elevator building but I can’t afford it and I also am way too young (46) to consider this injury the end of my independence. Nothing amplifies occasional feelings of loneliness quite like this.
I’m crowdsourcing ideas for how to: 1. make my movements easier while I recover, and 2. take any advice on hiring services to assist with basic errands before I’m confident driving. Is this something people do? 3. mentally recuperate.
Give me what you got, hive.
oh man, I had one pair of cuffed pants where the cuff was the PERFECT height to get caught by my high heel as I walked. I’m grateful the only thing seriously hurt was my pride! (I finally learned my lesson after 2 times “walking carefully” did nothing, and had the hem sewn shut about a quarter-inch from the top.)
OP here and I love the pants and the shoes and we probably need to break-up for good :(
I’d get to a physical therapist ASAP. If your health insurance offers online physical therapists, you might be able to meet with one and start therapy before your family member even arrives. They can recommend exercises that help with healing.
Definitely hire all the services! You can probably save a bundle by just using the generally available services (Instacart, TaskRabbit, Lyft etc.) as needed rather than specifically hiring an aide. That said, an aide might be nice if you want things done in a particular way on a regular basis.
A lot of sympathy from me. I’ve been dealing with an extremely debilitating injury since February and I’ve mostly been doing it on my own. I know my friends care but they’re not here to help me put my shoes on or clean my house, you know? It’s really hard. I’m glad your family is coming to help.
Same! Thinking of you, both.
Can you use crutches? This all sounds very dramatic for a sprained ankle.
I’m not the OP, but I couldn’t manage crutches on a staircase personally. I have my strengths and weaknesses, but stairs are something I always need to work on.
I mean, if you are in pain, that’s the whole story.
Please work on compassion for others.
I assume you’ve got the ankle in a very sturdy brace? If not, get yourself to an urgent care place and get one.
Bring a backpack every time you exit the building. It’s easier to hobble up the stairs when you’re not juggling shopping bags. Before you leave a room in your apartment take a moment to look around and grab anything you need. I agree with the other commenter to get groceries delivered, and include toiletries and paper goods that you would normally buy at the dr-gstore. Keep your meals simple and cook enough to have leftovers. When you’re already feeling crummy the last thing you need is a sink full of dirty dishes.
Just wanted to send my sympathy, and say I hope things improve soon.
I also live alone, and have difficulty with no close family nearby, and have similar fears to you when I get ill. It is really hard in a way that those who are married/partnered can’t quite appreciate. But I do have to say that sometimes your near neighbors will surprise you. If you hobble to the next door apartment and ask if they can grab a package from the lobby for you, you will be startled how people can actually be kind when you reach out and ask for help.
Meanwhile, elevate that ankle, use ice 3-4 times per day, and order crutches on amazon if you haven’t been given them already. Order what you need on Amazon and get food delivered. Are there any kids in the nearby apartments? “Hire” them to bring up your groceries/packages
You are going to be fine. You are lucky to have family that will still mobilize from afar to take care of you.
This is a great opportunity to ask your neighbors (or especially their kids!) if they’d help with mail or groceries or doordash in exchange for a nice dinner once you can walk again.
I need help with perspective on an in-law issue. My in-laws moved to our town recently while my parents have always lived in our town. They obviously want to be involved with us and the kids now that they’re here. My husband and I have split up the week and we get certain nights off while the other one does the night routine with the kids. When I make plans with my parents on a night my husband has off, there’s no expectation that he will join or be available and it hasn’t been a problem for anyone.
Now my in-laws are making plans on nights I have off and I’m really struggling with doing the same thing. We have a perfectly fine relationship, nothing great but nothing bad either. So if they come over for dinner on my night off I’m struggling with just popping in to say hello and then spending the rest of the evening in my bedroom relaxing and watching tv or talking on the phone, etc. just like my husband does. Or sitting with them for five minutes and then leaving to run errands go have dinner with friends or something.
I really love my time off and need it to recharge. My husband says I can do whatever I want and I don’t owe them anything. So why am I struggling with this?
Why can’t he invite them over on a night other than your “off” night?
Are you feeling bad because they’re guilting you or implying that you don’t want to see them or something?
Wait so on certain nights (how many per week?) you sit in your room and relax while your kids eat dinner with just your husband? I find that odd regardless of in-laws coming over, but I think it would be especially odd if you had your in-laws over and you’re just in your room relaxing while your kids eat dinner with them. On the other hand, if you’re going out with friends on your night off, I think it’s totally fair that you wouldn’t stay to hang out with your in-laws.
How many “off” nights are there? I’ll be honest that even though I’m pretty introverted and definitely need alone time to recharge, I think just sort of dividing the week up and trading off childcare is odd. Family time is very important and it kind of sounds like you’re functioning as friendly co-parents rather than a family unit. That said, if neither your husband nor your in-laws are bothered by you not joining on your “off” nights, I don’t think it’s a problem and you should try to get past your guilt about it.
I also hate this as a concept. It feels more like divide and conquer and less like a family unit. I hope it keeps working for you. So does this mean there is never time you both show up for your families if the evening is always divided?
Popping in to say that my family has the same set up with a “night off” for each parent once per week. We have young kids who still don’t sleep through the night, heavy fulltime jobs, and each of us absolutely needs one night a week to prioritize ourselves. I often schedule a heavy workout for that night or catch up with a friend for dinner. My super introverted husband goes to his favorite bookstore and reads Great Literature that is impossible to delve into with a three year old nearby (even asleep!). Or sometimes we stay home and do our own thing and just pop in at story time to wish the kids a good night. Like you, my parents live in my town. I often go to my local parents’ house for dinner on the night my husband is “off” and my mom packs him a goodie bag of dinner! But my parents also see him probably one other time a week at least, so it’s not like he’s ignoring or avoiding them.
But as to your actual question: I would feel uncomfortably cold towards my in-laws if I did not visit with them when they are at my house. In your shoes, I would probably ask my husband not to invite them over on my night-off, at least for a few months until we’ve established new relationship norms accounting for their being local. Once they realize that they will get to see you often, and they learn your family “night-off” dynamics, you can start skipping out on dinners. If you skip now once they’ve moved to your town (presumably to be near your family), they’ll think you’re actively avoiding them or resentful.
It doesn’t sound as if the husband is inviting his parents over, but that they’re inviting themselves. He should have a chat with them about your established schedule.
Paging yesterday afternoon’s flat shoe poster going to London:
Have a look at styles like Clark’s Torview and Clark’s Walla Orkhon.
Mostly venting..
I had to let someone go. They were hired by my predecessor and have been a terrible fit from get go. They insisted on using unapproved tools (stopped after much hoopla from me, kept bringing it up), their work product was always inaccurate and needed multiple rounds of feedback to get to passable. And they were super defensive.
Despite over a dozen conversations, a handful of occasions of written feedback they were shocked and surprised at the termination.. and believed they had been doing a fabulous job.
The termination was brutal…. so much arguing, some yelling and tears.
They followed up with an email with a very loose relationship with reality (claimed to have done an excellent job for a role was very different from what they were hired to do, several inconsistencies with what they’d shared in their CV etc) to the CEO and my boss.
Then followed that up with reaching out to vendors and others we work with claiming mass layoffs.. those vendors have been reaching out to me
And they have since written to HR claiming that people have reached out telling them that they were amazing and reset the bar in their role.
They were also exceptionally social and so i have people asking what happened.. all while also dealing with a bunch of teams blocked by work products they claimed to have delivered weeks ago… but did not in fact deliver complete product to
Being an adult is hard work
Arguing, yelling, tears? Are we really firing people in person in 2026? Wouldn’t it be better to call them at home and tell them not to come back in?
How are you responding to vendors (and other inquirers)? Can you straight up tell them there are no layoffs and “John” was rightly fired for performance issues?
apparently we are doing this in person… partly because in some jurisdictions it only counts if it is with wet ink on paper.
I am sticking to “no mass layoffs, why do you ask” and “oh” followed by switching topics.
I’m a manager and this would irk me so much. My performance-related dismissals didn’t result in this type of back-channeling and defensiveness, the people were not happy, but they went quietly.
I have no advice other than commiseration, and I think just telling the vendors that you’re working on coverage and will share the new contact from your org once you have the transition plan settled.
Maybe a cease and desist is needed here? At least relative to the vendors…