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Tuesday’s Workwear Report: The Tien Floral Print Top

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A woman wearing a blue floral blouse and black pants

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

Hello, gorgeous! This top from Elie Tahari looks like a tropical dream. If you’re in a part of the world that’s snowy and slushy right now, this might be just the ticket to lift you out of your February blues.

Pair with your favorite trousers for a polished, but peppy, work outfit.

The top is $325 at Nordstrom and comes in sizes XS-XL. 

Hunting in general for blouses in pretty prints? As of 2025, some of the reader-favorite brands include L'Agence, Equipment, Smythe, and Tucker NYC. On the more affordable side, check out NYDJ,* Halogen*, Loft,* and Kut from the Kloth. For plus sizes, check out Catherine Gee (and the asterisks)!

Sales of note for 3/15/25:

  • Nordstrom – Spring sale, up to 50% off
  • Ann Taylor – 40% off everything + free shipping
  • Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Eloquii – 50% off select styles + extra 50% off sale
  • J.Crew – Extra 30% off women's styles + spring break styles on sale
  • J.Crew Factory – 40% off everything + extra 20% off 3 styles + 50% off clearance
  • M.M.LaFleur – Friends and family sale, 20% off with code; use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – 40% off 1 item + 30% off everything else (includes markdowns, already 25% off)

263 Comments

  1. I feel like every time I turn around a new company or brand I use is bending the knee to the regime…

    Aside from Costco (not really, but it kind of feels that way), does no CEO have the b@lls to not even stand up to the regime but just not obey in advance?!

    1. Standing up to a mentally unstable person is scary. Most people fall in line, it’s how society works and forces compliance. Just think about n@zi Germany and how small the resistance was. Lots of people think they’d stand up to injustice but statistics show different.

      1. Standing way up may draw negative attention. But think of pre-WW2, some people said Eff that and went about doing their own fly-beneath-the-radar efforts that did real good. I read a story that Prince Phillip’s mother sheltered people and when questioned, noted that she was just a blind woman, nothing to see here, and it worked.

          1. And the message should be to stop waiting on others to fix things for us and just start fixing what we can. There is always something.

        2. You really can do a lot of things with a bit of boldness and confidence. As we can see both ways.

          1. Just look at how McConnell managed his time in the minority position in the Senate. The Democrats need to take lessons from him on effective obstruction and how to not be the bigger person.

        3. She was deaf. She was declared Righteous by Israel for sheltering a Jewish family during the war/occupation, which is how she came to be buried on the Mount of Olives.

          Princess Alice of Battenberg.

      2. There’s no excuse to do NOTHING though.

        To paraphrase, If you can’t fly, run. If you can’t run, crawl.

      3. Mentally unstable?
        I feel like this excuses a lot

        People can be wrong, evil, horrible hateful and aggressive people.

        That does not mean they are mentally unstable? Most mentally unstable people hear voices or feel compulsions or are completely functional and harmless.

        Many if not mentally unstable people can get better with treatment and/or medications.

        They are not horrible people bent on destroying society

    2. Neither they nor the Dems have any b@lls at all. I cannot believe how the Dems are rolling over and mounting almost no resistance. Obeying in advance, as you said, is the lowest form of cowardice.

      1. Serious question, do you take any radical socially unpopular stances that require sacrafice in your personal life? Things like not purchasing new, being car free, frequent protesting, veganism, etc?

        1. Yep! I’m not going to tell you what it is, but I’ve held a political stance (and associated action) that has lost me friends and alienated a few colleagues. Not seeing what that has to do with the cowardice of Dems, though, and I’m not in a position of significant political power as they are.

        2. Being car free for many is not a stance or a choice. Budget reality for a lot of folks.

        3. The “car-free” people I know all rely on friends’ owning cars and on rideshare apps and delivery services, and tend to be obnoxiously performative. I don’t think it’s as environmentally friendly and “ethical” as they like to claim.

          1. Weirdly, some of my former friends would assume this about me when it’s never been the case. If I offer to do something, I’ve already thought out the logistics. Likewise if I’m invited. My car owning friends would put all sorts of restrictions on my ability to participate that only existed in their imagination, not in reality.

          3. Fewer cars maybe, but terrible employment practices and more miles driven per trip.

      2. I work in a Dem AG’a office, and if you think that this office is rolling over, you have not been following the news.

        1. True, people are upset of course but don’t know what rolling over vs. not really looks like or entails.

    3. I don’t understand the legal basis for the administration’s demands. The operative SCOTUS decision bars race based decisions in college admissions and has been assumed to apply to employment decisions, but how does that bar a private company from making marketing decisions to reach as many people as possible? Or to recruit people with a broad range of experiences?

      1. AFAIK, it doesn’t, but these companies were clearly eager to drop the DEI facade at the first opportunity. There was never significant diversity at the highest levels anyway, and companies like Google (~dO nO eViL~) have been chipping away at the rights of the less fortunate employees (contractors, women who can or did get pregnant, POC) for years. Trump is giving them carte blanche for the bigger cuts.

        1. Some of the stuff is so stupid though, like rushing to remove black history month off of calendars. Did anyone even ask Google to do that? That seems like the type of thing you could quietly leave on.

          2. Oh I agree, that type of change is totally on Google. I’m sure that some of the bros in power there are positively gleeful about Trump – they’ll go above and beyond gladly, not reluctantly.

          3. So many things are easy to do or not do if you have even a little bit of power. I realized this after being the chair of the DEI committee at an old job and then a mid level manager at my new job. All the things which were a mountain to get done at my old job are very easy to do now.

            If I were at Google and my direct report came up with this idea I would simply say no.

          4. I guess I need a new personal email. What is as user friendly as google? But not a government suck up?

        2. I guess it’s not so surprising for companies that only discovered DEI in 2020, and that largely used it to market themselves as with the times but leadership was not strongly committed to the values. In that context, the programs that are now being shuttered were perhaps not that effective to begin with.

          1. The 2020 version of was never about diversity, equity, or inclusion. It failed because it was about exactly the opposite and because companies only adopted it for political and marketing reasons. True diversity, equity, and inclusion come from viewing all people as human beings with inherent worth and providing them with fair opportunities from birth, starting with high-quality subsidized child care and public education and policies aimed at reducing income inequality. Sending employees to training sessions to be sorted into “oppressor” and “oppressed” categories, or telling white researchers that they are categorically unqualified to study issues of race and class (both of which I witnessed firsthand), actively undermines the true cause.

          2. I was involved in some of those circa 2020 DEI efforts. There were two types of people spearheading them–toxic ideologues on one hand, and cynical leaders who only cared about optics on the other. No wonder everyone hated these programs.

    4. Current irritation is Google changing the name of the Gulf of Mexico on its maps in America. Obeying in advance.

        1. Sea of Musk

          Even in other places it’s now listed at Gulf of Mexico (Gulf of America)

          And yes, this is exactly what my DH’s European relatives were telling us over New Year’s, that resisting is a lot harder than many people think. Resisting via the courts means falling into their playbook to challenge the rule of law because what happens when the President ignores the courts? Nothing. The rule of law is based on society agreeing to follow the laws. And protest in the streets, especially violent protest is what they are looking for as a chance to seize additional power/justify bringing in the military.

          Non-violent civil disobedience a la Dr King or Gandhi is about the only thing that works.

      2. Surprised that we’re going back to Fort Bragg. I get that they found another Bragg to name it after (I’m going with Fort Billy Bragg, since we can now call things what we wish to) but I’d think no matter his history, we shouldn’t name things after losers (being generous here) as a basic gatekeeping matter. Otherwise, are we going to get Fort Benedict Arnold at some point?

        1. This is the problem–people in the US and abroad are taking seriously statements that should, at least publicly, be treated as jokes. Trudeau, for instance, needs to stop publicly stating that the threat of Canada’s annexation is serious. He should be calling it out as preposterous nonsense, even if behind the scenes he’s seriously preparing to oppose it. Treating these things as legitimate makes it a thousand times more likely that they will actually occur.

        2. US site says ‘Gulf of America’

          International ones say ‘Gulf of Mexico (Gulf of America)’

    5. What’s the best adblocker? Seems like a good way to mount passive resistance to Google’s biggest moneymaker, as long as enough people do it. It will have the unfortunate effect of hurting small businesses, but Google won’t respond to anything other than a hard hit to the bottom line.

      1. Privacy badger browser extension, or switch to using Brave browser altogether.

  2. Has anyone ever taken a lettering class or a book illustration class (like medieval-style)? I am hoping that there may be some zoom class (and a kiddo taking Latin may want to take it with me).

    3. I just have to say I love that your kid is learning Latin! I studied Latin in college and it made it so much easier to learn Spanish.

      1. I majored in Latin, and, while the benefits for learning other languages were real, I find that it has made me a better accountant.

  3. Related to the bending the knee post – Where do you buy random needed things from that is not Target or Amazon? Costco? Target would otherwise have been most convenient. Things like a coffee grinder, travel toiletry bag, laundry detergent.

    1. I’m currently really struggling with this! I dropped Amazon, target, and Walmart. I’m left with Costco and grocery stores but there are no big box store or equivalents.

      I use Costco for what I can, but it’s not for everything for me.

      One thing I’m struggling with – regular grocery stores and pharmacies are SO expensive compared to Walmart (where I used to go for groceries, toiletries, and random things).

      Im a fed in a very not popular department , so I’m trying to save money before the RIF and shut down, but I’m also trying to vote with my wallet.

      1. Also a fed facing all the same issues. I’m also in an agency out in the boonies. I buy fewer things but generally do pay a bit more to purchase them locally. It’s really been good for clarifying wants from needs. I spend a lot less than I did in my last city, because there arent as many options.

    2. Laundry detergent comes from a local co-op, basically any consumer goods are second hand. My coffee grinder is a high end model I found on FB marketplace, I sewed my own toiletry bag from scraps (pants that ripped in the inner thigh). Everything is a conscious choice with a focus on longevity and responsibility. Convenience is usually a sacrifice.

      1. We will soon be Ma Ingalls. I’m glad I can sew but not quite ready to make candles from beef tallow.

        1. I want to try making my own yogurt, although not for political reasons, lol.

          1. It’s super easy! Even if you just use a pan on the stove instead of whatever countertop device people opt for these days.

        1. It’s just a matter of priorities, no impulse purchases, and doing without sometimes. When I think something is wrong I simply won’t do it, which sort of forces me to do the right thing. But also because I do focus on longevity it’s not as hard as it seems and there’s actually very little day to day purchasing/making/finding, I’ve had the same stainless steel cookware for 15 years (and I’m sure I’ll have them the rest of my life), when I buy detergent I buy 6 months worth etc.

          2. Buying quality once if you have the funds doesn’t seem all that sacrifice-y. It’s like “my Aga lasts for years” or using the family silver.

          3. None of the quality things are purchased new they’re conscious second hand finds. Nothing was expensive.

          4. I don’t buy much but when I do I buy a lot second hand (I also used to buy a lot from Amazon).

            It’s fine to encourage second hand purchases, home made things, and doing without but you have to acknowledge that where you’re saving financially, you’re usually spending much more time.

            Second hand shopping isn’t as reliable as buying new (in that it’s hit or miss if you can find what you need). It takes time to comb through the aisles snd go from thrift store to thrift store. Not everyone lives in an area with a robust second hand market.

        2. For me, it doesn’t take much more time or energy, and it’s important.

          For the laundry detergent, I have 2 containers. When one is empty, I put it in the car so I can stop by the refill station next time I’m in that neighborhood. For clothes, I just go into stores or open websites that align with my values. Etc. I haven’t shopped at amazon for years, and it hasn’t made any difference to my life that I can tell, other than I keep a list of items that I need and look for when I’m at my normal places instead of the instant gratification of adding to cart.

      3. I have a fluffy dog. Going to save the floof and card it and spin it into yarn and either knit or weave it into something.

        1. It’s not that hard to simply admit you don’t care enough to make sacrifices rather than invent an insane hypothetical to soothe the ego

          1. All that $ that you aren’t spending is going where? A bank too big to fail? Or a mayonnaise jar?

        2. It’s called chiengora, and isn’t super soft for next-to-skin wear unless you have an unusually fine-haired breed. Fun hobby to get into, though.

          1. “Chiengora” is new to me but very funny.

            Ages ago I bought my friend who had two huskies a book titled Knitting With Dog Hair. I thought it was a joke but it was serious. :)

            I am a knitter. I personally wouldn’t go that far. But it is actually a thing.

    3. I buy laundry detergent at the grocery store. I’ve never gotten it from Amazon or a warehouse store. I would buy a coffee grinder from either William Sonoma or my local roaster. My last toiletries bag came from LL Bean 40 years ago.

    4. I stopped buying things on Amazon for the most part because I think Jeff Bezos is the most pathetic in this – he is so rich he can tell everyone to F off and he won’t because he wants more and more money. I don’t have the same problem with Target because it’s a corporation with shareholders
      and I don’t really care about whether it pays lip service to DEI by having a meaningless section on its webpage. In many ways, I think we need to depoliticize things and maybe this will help in the long run. That said, I go out of my way more to just shop in person at other places or at least spread my money around so it’s not all going to one awful place. I think a lot of what is wrong with our society is that we don’t have human contact with each other as much anymore so the more I can contribute to that, the better.

      1. Agree re: Amazon and would also add that it’s an absolutely dangerous place to buy anything for infants or health/beauty. There are SO many counterfeits at all times, it’s unbelievable. I have personally received used/stained items and/or counterfeits and I’ve heard from locals about ordering hard-to-find infant formula and receiving something that is clearly unsafe to drink.

      2. I used to buy everything online – I think that that freed me up for more time to see my friends and be involved in my community.

        Now I’ve given up Amazon, Walmart, and Target I spend a lot more time running errands. I don’t feel more connected to my community because I still can’t use the local Acme and CVS so I’m driving to another state (15 mins, but still) for Costco, Trader Joes, and Aldi.

        I’m less likely to go to my local coffee shop because I’m spending more on necessities, so I have less money to grab a coffee or browse at the farmers market. I have less time and money to cook and host dinner for my friends.

        1. One of the joys in my life is that there is a nearby shopping center with a Costco AND a Trader Joe’s AND an Aldi. I realize it is not so easy for most.

          1. I think Aldi has also dropped its DEI stuff. Would love to be proven wrong, because fin my area, Aldi seems to hit the right balance of cost and quality (produce at my local Costco has gone so downhill, it’s not even funny).

      3. I am more upset with Target than Walmart. Walmart never pretended to be socially conscious.

    5. Costco. I honestly don’t know how anyone deals with Amazon. It’s a sea of shady sellers that you have to wade through to make sure you are buying from a legit seller.

      With Costco I know it’s going to be a solid, likely higher end, quality item at a great price.

      1. Adding that I shop at Costco at lot but almost exclusively online (clothes) or via Instacart (food, household/dry goods, pharmacy type stuff).

        I don’t think I’ve been in a physical store in like a year.

      2. Not to defend Amazon, but it super easy to filter the seller to make sure you are buying directly from Amazon.

        1. Their inventory management practices mix stock from all vendors so you can still get fakes.

    6. I can’t really speak to their politics because they’re not an American company, but my default for cheap but durable home goods is Ikea. I’ve bought dishes, towels, trash cans, door mats, light bulbs, and a bunch of other random stuff there for prices comparable or maybe lower than Target and most of it has held up extremely well (my last set of towels lasted more than 10 years). If I wanted to buy a nice toiletry bag, I’d probably look at LL Bean, but you could probably get something serviceable at Ikea- they usually have lots of little pouches for just a few dollars.

      1. This is a good idea, will check it out! Agree that they’re good for a lot of random houseware things.

      2. Ikea’s politics are pretty solid. They really work at making things more environmentally friendly and they often feature diverse families in their advertising.

    7. I’m not American but you’d be amazed at what random things you can find at the dollar store.

    8. In the order you listed them: the coffee grinder is available at the local cooking-enthusiast store, the travel toiletry bag is a Ziploc bag bought at the grocery store, and the laundry detergent was bought at Lowe’s/Home Depot who have shockingly competitive prices on cleaning supplies. Unlike some of the posters, I don’t go to extremes, but I still avoid Amazon, Whole Foods, and Walmart. I’m not convinced Target is actually bad, but I don’t regularly shop there because it is a big box store.

      1. But then you might want to look into Home Depot if you are trying to “live your values.”

    9. I have given up Amazon Walmart and target. I’d give my right arm for an ethical big box store.

    10. Does shopping in person change the calculus at all? Yes, it’s still the same umbrella company getting your money, but you are supporting local jobs and helping to keep in-person shopping opportunities in your community. Plus, I imagine the environmental impact is slightly less without having to ship so many things to you individually?

      Maybe stopping by these stores in person is a decent alternative to ordering online while you find new sources.

      1. The research on environmental impact actually supports buying online in most cases, though it certainly depends on speed of shipping, whether you’re able to cluster errands, stop in the way home from work, etc. I think there are a lot of other reasons to support local stores, but it’s definitely not great environmentally to go to a bunch of different stores if they’re not close to you and require separate trips for each one. If you take this approach, it makes sense to plan your shopping to minimize the number of trips you have to make.

        1. That’s helpful! I was thinking that at Walmart or Target you can get a bunch of things at once, eliminating individual trips. And I know that when I buy online at Target my things show up in five different boxes in different days. I guess it’s perhaps not an overwhelmingly important consideration since none of this (consumerism, these stores) is great for the environment.

          1. Yeah, the best thing is just to buy less! But even if your stuff comes in 5 boxes on three days, that’s almost certainly because that’s the most efficient way to do it. Each one comes from a different distribution center, so it would increase emissions to send them all to the same place first, and they’re all sent out on trucks that are already coming to your neighborhood. The other thing that really does help is to avoid fast shipping. That will allow them to always ship ground as efficiently as possible rather than send your package by air or on less efficient routes.

          2. yeah, it bugs me that target stuff ships in so many boxes, but it’s partly because their catalog also has lots of non-target sellers included. For me this creates a similar experience when I e.g. search for undies, that I can scroll forever through the options and am shown an endless number of brands which may or may not be trustworthy. It’s overwhelming for me.
            My solution is to filter for curbside pickup items and just get those.

          3. I just ordered two cosmetic items from Nordstrom. Each item shipped in its own box, and the “gift with purchase” came in a third box!

            I’m sticking with Nordstrom, by the way. I gave up on Sephora.

        2. I have heard this before, and I just don’t know how many people run to the multiple stores for one thing at each every day. The same people I know who have cut out online shopping or reduced it group their errands. Like we did before “buy now” existed.

          Before anyone goes there, I grew up in a rural area. We went shopping once a week in one of a couple of nearby towns. If we didn’t get the thing during that shopping trip, we lived without it for a week (obviously wouldn’t apply to emergencies). I promise it’s possible to keep a list of things you need and group errands appropriately.

          1. My husband and I both work from home, so any shopping gets done only if we deliberately go out to run errands. We can’t really combine that many things because nothing is in the same area, plus the main errand we run is grocery shopping, which requires getting the groceries home while they’re still cold. I mostly just don’t buy stuff at all, but I think there are plenty of people out running errands constantly. The average person in my metro area makes 3.5 trips per day, almost all by car.

          2. I love these questions where people ask how to do something that might cause an inconvenience. Then people post how they do it. Then a ton of other people post why it’s inconvenient to impossible for them to do the thing. I mean, okay that’s fine. Don’t do it then!

          3. Where did the 3.5 trips per day come from and what counts as a trip? I honestly don’t know anyone who makes that many trips, if you mean an actual errand or going to an event. If gong out to drop my kid off at school counts as a trip, maybe, but that still seems high.

            Who are all these people running many separate errands? Everyone I know is too busy and lazy to do that, and you group your errands together.

          4. It’s from a long running biannual metro area survey of thousands of people to track travel behavior over time. I just read a news article about the latest one this week, talking about how, post pandemic, people commute less but drive more throughout the day for random errands. Only 35% of vehicle miles are commuting, the rest would be things like going to the store or picking your kid up at school (if you do that on the way home from work that all still counts as one trip, though not sure if they would still classify it as commuting). But based on that data, a lot of people are driving around a lot more than I do, that’s for sure! I was citing that study not to show what was possible, just what people do in reality.

    11. Coffee grinder: Homegoods for a cheap one, Crate and Barrel for a nicer one
      Travel toiletry bag: TJ Maxx, Nordstrom Rack
      Laundry detergent: Home Depot or the grocery store

      In my experience it’s really not hard.

        1. For me, it’s not. The toiletry bag and coffee grinder probably aren’t emergencies. So I just add those to a list and whenever I’m already at or near those stores, I also get the toiletry bag. You just have to decide that it’s okay not to have instant gratification.

          1. Even without instant gratification, it’s really out of my way to go to one of those stores. There’s no time I’d otherwise be near one unless I’m explicitly going there.

          2. But that’s the point: in order to cut back on online shopping, you will have to intentionally go to in-person stores. You can batch the things you get at each one if you start a list and go once a month, or some such approach.

          3. +1. You just keep a list of the things you need at Homegoods. When that list is long enough to justify a trip, you go and buy the things on the list. It feels like we’re all suffering from collective amnesia about the world before 2005 or whatever.

          4. Well there are a lot of us here who have had easy Amazon prime our whole adult lives.

            What was I doing in 2005? I was in elementary school. So yeah I don’t remember it all that much, since I wasn’t in charge of shopping for a family.

            However, what do I remember about 2005? My dad having a blue collar pension job that paid well enough on 40 hours a week and had good and cheap healthcare. My mom (a teacher) having no expectation to be checking email outside of school (she had a desktop at school – no laptop to take home and obviously no smartphone). She’d occasionally (and I do mean occasionally) grade at home, but zero expectation to field emails and calls from parents and students all night.

            Their jobs paid well so they could afford to live in a close in suburb for easy commutes and be near family – my dad’s commute is less than 5 miles / 10 minutes. My mom chose a longer commute (didn’t want to live in the same town as her students), so hers is 20 mins. They live in a walkable town and are a 5-10 drive from 3 grocery stores and a Target and a Walmart.

            When I was growing up, by 4pm my parents were both home from work with no ability or expectation to do any more work at night – leaving ample time to run errands in person , make dinner, and do stuff around the house.

            If I could have a job with good enough salary and benefits where I could be home by 4pm every day and easily run errands in person I wouldn’t order stuff online either. But that’s not my reality.

            Life and expectations have changed too much since 2005 to expect that lifestyle to still apply.

          5. I’m fine waiting a month and making a list. I’m just pointing out that it’s not so simple for everyone.

            I have to drive 25 mins to Homegoods – do you know how many big box stores I pass on that drive? Then, you get to Homegoods and its a crap shoot as to if they even have what you’re looking for. So maybe you just drove 25 minutes and wasted that time and that gas for nothing.

            I also batch shopped at big box stores, but I knew that when I did my monthly trip (a 5-10 min drive) there that they’d more or less have what I was looking for. I could check their inventory in a particular store online if I wasn’t sure they’d have something. But, it was a safe bet that they’d have pretty much anything I needed. I could also get that week’s grocery and household needs while at the big box store.

          6. Not having a working coffee grinder would be an emergency for my husband. We would try to fix it first, and then probably order from Breville directly or see if Amazon has a dented box one, which is how we got our current one. But how often do you buy coffee grinders and toiletry bags? Once a decade? A toiletry bag developing a hole would be pretty easy to fix, at least until you have a chance to get a replacement.

          7. Its not collective amnesia about the world before 2005, it’s that life has changed so much since then. I didn’t feel the time or money crunch I now feel.

        2. If you’re looking for a cheap, ethical way to get every item you *want* at a single store or have it magically arrive on your doorstep within 48 hours…no, that’s not realistic. You make a running list of items, purchase them when you have time, and do without until then. You buy coffee grounds instead of whole beans for a couple weeks until you can make it to the store, you put your toiletries in a ziploc bag, you don’t wait until you’re on the last drop of detergent to buy more. No one would call me a minimalist and I really don’t think it’s hard.

      2. I find it harder, but it’s because I’m shopping for a household with Crohn’s, Celiac, eczema, and migraines. I feel like special needs products used to be easier to find locally, but now it seems that they’ve all moved online (and “Whole Foods” has taken over the little local health food stores that mostly kept the lights on by catering to allergy and medical diet shoppers back in the day).

        1. Maybe, but I also feel like a lot of people would have been told to suck it up some decades ago, and not had access to specialty products. They’d just have lower quality of life, which is very easy to forget.

          1. Maybe? I lived in a rural part of the midwest in the 1990s and we got specialty products through mail order back then, often by going in together with other people to order things by the case.

            There are definitely still people who just suffer symptoms and complications of their conditions from poor access. It’s incredible to me that some products cost as much as ten times more just for leaving out an ingredient!

    12. Just want to say – if you have the money where you can afford to only make ethical purchases, your job is probably not very ethical.

        2. Yeah – people with ethical jobs have always had to do this because we’ve never made enough to not prioritize our purchases.

        3. HA HA HA – I make 51k a year as a teacher – I’ve always, always had to prioritize what I buy. I buy a lot less than most people here, I’m sure. But when I do buy things, I also need to figure out the best bang for my buck – and unfortunately that usually means Walmart

          1. None of this was directed at you, personally. If you need or want to shop at Wal Mart, please do so. I was simply responding to the person above who accused me of having an unethical job because I don’t shop at certain places. I don’t have one. I don’t make as much as most people on this board. I make decisions that are not always perfect.

          2. This random stranger who despises Walmart says that’s okay. Thank you for being a teacher, you are impacting the greater good through your work. We all should do our best (and be honest with ourselves if we can do more!) but commerce is a complex web and even the “better” choices aren’t totally awesome.

            To me, I’d rather have teachers who shop at Walmart than more wall streeters who can purchase curated, free trade items while children get no education.

      2. I was the most hippy zero waste when I made 40k at an eNGO. I make a bit more now but my day job still saves the planet.

    13. As a city dweller (I think this matters, more below), I’m really struggling with this. I used to just order everything from Amazon, Walmart, or Target, but I don’t know what to do now.

      Why being a city dweller matters:
      – I don’t have a car. I walk 90% of the places I go and take public transit the rest of the time. I’m limited to buying what I can carry from places I can walk to.
      – My apartment is small. I sometimes join my mom’s Costco trips, but my 1 BR is 530 sq ft.
      – stores near me are limited, small, and pricey. There are no big box stores in my area. The small “city” Targets, grocery stores, and pharmacies are smaller and have limited choices and inventories (the Acme near me is so empty it looks Soviet). Everything here is expensive.

      I had been ordering my groceries via Walmart+ (thanks to this board’s recommendations). I was saving roughly $50/wk on groceries, toiletries, and household needs. I make $70k – that $50 is nothing to sneeze at.

      I’ve switched back to my local stores, but honestly not sure how long I can do it due to the increased price.

      1. As someone who was also a carless city dweller until a couple years ago, I lived without delivery but yes the city can be a PITA. I brought a backpack and two zipper top totes on the train to my preferred grocery store each week. I rarely bought heavy items like cases of seltzer, gallons of milk, canned soup, etc. The furniture in my studio apartment all had storage like a cruise ship (bed frame with drawers, ottoman and end tables with an interior compartment, tv stand with cabinets). I learned to be flexible about toiletries because the selection at my local Walgreens was limited and inconsistent. Saturday afternoon was dedicated to random errands at specialty stores. I batched the errands because I could only carry so much on my back and public trs-prt takes a while. When apartment hunting my top priority was proximity to the right train line. It’s rough in comparison to the convenience of the suburbs and city living is expensive. But I did this for years.

      2. I’m a single mom of 3 children living in an urban community with no car. I use a trolley. IDGAD what people think. There is no other way to possibly get enough food in bags that I can carry home to feed my children for more than a day.

        For budget, I feed 4 people for $150/wk doing a mix of trader joe and ShopRite. If you plan your menu and keep it simple it’s fine. I buy a lot from Costco once a quarter. We eat a lot of lentil soup, tuna, sardines and fruit/veggies. Trader Joe’s have not priced their eggs at crazy levels so I eat a lot of omelettes, deviled eggs and cheese & egg sandwiches.

    14. Honestly, do you need a laundry detergent? Various combos of blue Dawn, ammonia, white vinegar, and borax will clean most anything.

      1. You can seriously eff up your wash machine playing around with alternative detergents. And if it’s a water saving machine, you’re probably going to want enzyme cleaner so your clothes don’t stink.

      2. You still need to procure those ingredients though. They don’t just fall from the sky.

        i’m going to go out on a limb and say someone who had previously had laundry detergent on subscribe and save (aka me) was doing it for convenience… DIYing everything is harder, this isn’t a suggestion that’s likely to be helpful. You have to meet people where they are. I’m not saying people should opt out of voting with their wallet for convenience, but that change for most people is going to be incremental.

          1. Just checked the website of both my local Acme and Walmart – neither carry it in store, it has to be ordered online and shipped.

          2. It’s literally not sold in store at my local grocery store or Walmart. You have to order it online

          3. Have you looked? Someone was complaining on my local message board about not being able to find borax and they simply didn’t realize it came in a box and was at literally every store.

    15. I love Costco and Aldi and Homegoods as much as the next gal, but they’re still not a 1:1 replacement for a Walmart or Target for me.

      There’s virtually no guarantee of what those stores will have in stock and when. If I was going to Walmart, I could be reasonably sure that whatever I’d need would be in stock and affordable. If I wasn’t sure if Walmart had something, I could go online and check the inventory in my store. If I go to Homegoods, it’s always going to be a crapshoot as to what they have. I love browsing there for fun, but it’s not reliable.

      I also appreciated that while getting XYZ random need at Walmart, I could also do my weekly grocery shop there, saving time and gas.

      1. It seems this is a case of not letting the perfect be the enemy of the good. There is not a perfect option for everything (or anything? The Good Place plot about the ripple effect comes to mind). Do your best to choose ethically when you can. Sometimes you will still need to get something at Walmart because we are human and have a lot going on.

        1. This! Thank you! Just because you can’t implement every suggestion here all the time doesn’t mean it’s impossible to shop in line with your values whenever possible.

      2. This works for Costco too no? I use Instacart to check store inventory even if I plan to buy in person (which is rare).

    16. I’ve always tried to be ethical and eco friendly with my purchases, but I also have to recognize that I have limited time, money, and energy – especially since I’m a teacher.

      I think as long as we’re all doing our best, that’s all we can do. Extend a little grace to understand that your situation is not universally applicable and what works for you may feel insurmountable to others.

    17. Honestly, I’m still ordering online. The cost:benefit ratio here is that I have kids and running errands in person takes away from quality time (yes, when I do run errands in person they’re usually with me – but that’s not quality time that’s “are we done yet?”x100 time).

      If I were to go to Homegoods for a coffee grinder, for example, that includes a 20ish minute drive each way + time spent shopping. I’d rather use my Saturday morning for something fun with my kids.

      2. This is me too. I very rarely go into actual stores. If I do, it’s because I’m clothes shopping for a specific need and want to try stuff on. I don’t want to drag my kids along to run random errands. My free time is spent on quality time with my family or with my friends. I don’t care enough to change that. I use Target, Amazon Prime and Costco (the only store I take my kids to monthly and we have a lunch date there). Groceries come from Costco, BJs curbside pickup, farmer’s market in the summer (with the kids and enjoying the morning at the local small town downtown where the market is), and a weekly stop at the local independent grocery store (down the street from the kids’ Sunday school). I try to take my kids to the local independent toy store so they can pick presents for any birthday parties they’re invited to but, if I forget, I order something on Amazon/Target without any guilt.

          1. This is literally the most humble-braggy, performative thing I’ve read on here in a while. And that says a lot.

        2. Anon at 11:27 here – yup I order stuff online, do a monthly after dinner Costco run, and patronize the local independently owned stores in my walkable town. We can walk to a small family-owned and run grocery store (like 8 aisles – it’s small!), several independent restaurants/coffee shops/bars, a few boutiques/thift stores/antique stores, a movie theater, an independent hardware store, and a garden store, plus a seasonal farmers market. My kids are getting old enough now that I can send them to the store to pick something up for me too – they love feeling grown up! Most groceries still come from Costco + a weekly Walmart delivery, but the one offs are all from the local place.

          Less time running errands means more time for other involvement in my community though. We host family or friends over for dinner at least 2x a week and have a monthly “open house” party. My husband and I are both involved in all sorts of community stuff: coaching or reffing kids’ sports, community boards, town civic association, Sunday school teaching, elections volunteers.

    18. For context, I have a kid, a pet, and work in local government in a major city. I have a car but didn’t for many years, and I mostly use it for kid activity stuff, rarely for shopping.

      Mostly, I don’t buy very much “stuff” and when I do, I buy it at places that specialize in that type of thing rather than one-stop-shops.
      I bought my coffee grinder either at crate and barrel or williams sonoma 10+ years ago (it still works great), but mostly I buy ground beans at a local coffee shop that roasts their own. I bought a travel toiletry bag and some travel containers in 2008 from Muji (and a carry on eddie bauer suitcase from target) and I still use them. I bought packing cubes from Muji around 2010 or so, and I use those and some bags that came with fancy shoes for travel. I’ve also gotten lots of high quality housewares at the Container Store and a locally owned hardware store.
      Laundry detergent comes from the supermarket or drugstore, I try to watch for sales. Most of my home chemistry stuff comes from my locally owned supermarket, some from the national brand drugstore.
      The only things I consistently buy online are prescription cat food (a LOT cheaper than at the vet) and used books that my library doesn’t have (usually craft books or academic titles). I occasionally order sneakers in the next size up online for my kid.
      I appreciate everything that Costco is doing but the one near me almost gave me a panic attack when I went with a friend so I unfortunately will not be joining.

    19. I mostly get laundry detergent at Smart & Final, and CVS often has toiletry bags (but I hate their “lock everything up” nonsense so much I’m trying to wean myself off of it). For the grinder, I’d probably buy off of a kitchen goods website like Crate & Barrel or Sur La Table but I do like fancy kitchen stuff.

      After getting into a shouty argument with a line-cutter, I have banned myself from Costco. So many people, such mayhyem, just no.

    20. Coffee grinder – look at what Wirecutter recommends, and buy directly from the manufacturer or a smaller retailer. Sometimes I wait for sales.

      Travel toiletry bag – similarly look for best recommended ones. A few years back LL Bean had a popular one, great deal on sale.

      Laundry detergent — COSTCO. Everything that makes sense I buy from Costco.

      I don’t buy stuff constantly. I make note about things that I need, wait for sales/look for coupon codes. I borrow from friends and also love using my local Freecycle site. I give stuff away on Freecycle all the time. My favorite things I got from Freecycle are 2 antique wooden rocking chairs for my porch, and a new blue yoga mat.

  4. Lovely shirt pictured here! I enjoy the florals and the non-black background. The shiny material looks dress but the neckline and sleeves look good for work. Thanks for sharing!

    1. I keep trying to level up to Me & Em but I have the same reaction. That is a lot of $ for what I imagine to be meh synthetics. Open to someone confirming otherwise (new year, new size, so need new clothes).

      1. Not all synthetics are the same. Me and Em has gorgeous quality clothes. It’s not exactly Jacqueline Smith for WalMart.

        1. Honest question: what is different and why not use wool or silk or cotton? Stuff that doesn’t melt or get weird (like rayon)?

          1. Well, I prefer a high end synthetic because it feels just like silk but doesn’t wrinkle and packs better.

          2. Those fabrics cannot just be thrown in the washing machine/dryer and need to be ironed.

            I understand the love of natural fabrics, but in addition to cost, there are practical reasons people with busy lives opt for wash and wear fabrics, particularly for items that will need to be cleaned after every wear.

          3. I get it if they are true wash and wear (some of MMlFS) but so many synthetics are dry clean only. At least silk and wool could be hand washed generally. I tend to avoid anything dry clean only vs dry cleaning allowed / preferred.

          4. This specific shirt says it is machine wash, tumble dry. I completely agree on not buying dry clean only tops! But my experience hand washing silk marked dry clean only is that it is 50/50 on whether the dye actually survives.

      2. I have two ME+EM items bought second hand.

        One is a cotton knit, the other is a lined skirt made from polyester. Both have held up very well to repeated gentle machine washing, hang/flat dry.

        Both are well made, and worth more than I paid second hand.

        I wouldn’t get a polyester top or dress from them, I wouldn’t choose that from any brand.

  6. I am just sitting down at my desk after one hell of a Monday – left the house at 6AM and was on the phone until 9PM for a client’s board meeting…and working the entire time between. My calendar is gloriously free today. I suspect I’m going to be a bit lazy, but looking forward to that luxury. It’s unusual to get the worst part of your week done on Monday, but also pretty great.

  7. I’m looking for fun wallpaper for a powder bath update. I’m specifically looking for some sort of busy pattern with hidden whimsical animals/people doing funny things (I’m leaning into fun-aunt and I think my nieces would love this). I’m picturing a pattern but when you look closer it turns into a where’s waldo of fun. I got the idea from a restaurant that had koala wallpaper in the bathroom but they were doing…adult things and I’d like a more youngster-friendly print (that print is kushy koalas by astek if you’d like to see, but I want something busier). Does anyone have any recs? I’m not even sure of search terms to find this but welcome any insight. TIA!

    1. Look into William Morris or Timorous Beasties, lots of animals hidden in garden settings (strawberry thief is the obvious one of course but lots of others!).

    2. You should look on Spoonflower – independent artists post designs and I’ve seen things like what you’re describing there.

      1. Adding that I love the Spoonflower wallpapers (I used one on a home project). If I ever get my life together, I would love the Peacock wallpaper from Rifle Paper Co for my powder room.

    2. He is bipolar and currently in a manic phase. (And I don’t care that he now claims a different diagnosis; his symptoms are classic.)

      His behavior is abhorrent, and he is clearly being empowered by toadies, but I feel a bit sorry for him.

    3. I think the confusion is part of the whole “game” for him. He’s unmedicated and clearly has some trauma. He’s flailing and drifting from importance and visibility and is frantically throwing things at the wall, like a 3 year old saying bad words, to get *attention*, even negative attention. People don’t rise to incredible heights of worldwide fame because they don’t need attention like oxygen and I think almost all celebs and entertainers are on the “narcissism spectrum” if there is such a thing.
      He’s playing with fire trying to get attention and eyes on him and he’s run out of genuinely interesting and thoughtful things to say.

  9. Need some ideas. I left my job last summer to take a sabbatical and then launch my own one-woman consulting firm. There were lots of reasons for this move, but one big one was so I could have the flexibility to wrangle (and be present for) our three kids. One is in upper elementary school, one is in middle school, and one is in high school (not a driver yet though).

    I’m thinking ahead to summer. Right now, I do most of my work when our kids are at school — I run them around a fair amount in the evenings and just try to be around to hang out, connect, help with homework, etc. (Spouse has a travel-heavy job; he’s present when he’s home but the being home part is unreliable.) In the summer, our family does best when the kids have a mix of structured days (full or partial day camps) and days without plans.

    My question is: how do I carve out consistent work time to serve my clients and balance that with kid time? I know from experience that all three won’t be in camps simultaneously — but maybe I need to prioritize that? My eldest will likely work a summer job while also playing her sport of choice (which is a summer sport), so her time is pretty well spoken for. It’s the other two that I think need more managing, just b/c they’re younger and less independent. I can leave them home alone on non-camp days (and go work at a coffee shop, for example) but am concerned that screens will become the default. Would love insights from anyone who’s had to juggle this. The autonomy of my professional life is in some ways a curse!

    2. You hire consistent childcare to cover the times when kids are not in overlapping camps.

    3. prioritize scheduling camps at the same time, hire a mother’s helper, rules about no screens, go work from the library and bring the kids with you. also if you can afford camp all summer, even if it’s half day camps and you can make the driving logistics work, put the kids in camp!

      1. This. And maybe the middle kid is old enough for a CIT program, which might (hopefully!) mean they will be working next summer instead of you having to pay for 2 camps.
        Essentially though we prioritize day camp for at least 6 weeks during the summer for the reasons you articulated. During the rest of summer break we either travel, allow for a week or two of ‘vegging’ or do grandparent camp.

    4. I was an only child, so YMMV, but as a tween and young teen, during weeks when I didn’t have camp, my mom gave me a list of chores/jobs to do in exchange for paying for stuff like tickets to the local theme park with friends or other bigger-ticket things. I’m sure I had plenty of screen time too, but I remember sleeping in, getting through my chores, and spending the rest of the afternoon and evening riding bikes and swimming with my neighborhood friends.

      Up until I was about 13, my mom hired a college-aged babysitter who could drive me places and also lifeguard if my friends and I decided to swim. The babysitters mostly sat around watching soaps, but they probably also made sure I ate lunch and occasionally drove me to a movie or a friend’s house.

    5. Set up a schedule that plans for independent play for a couple of hours each morning. If they are old enough to be left alone or unsupervised, they don’t need you to entertain them. Make sure they have books, puzzles, chores, legos, sports equipment and a map of the neighborhood and let them figure it out. You can work in your home office so that you’re there if they need you, but let them be a little bored. Then have a check-in for lunch, maybe some screens for an hour or two in the early afternoon while you finish up your work for the day (if they’ve earned it), then onto your fun afternoons and evenings together.

    6. Similarish situation. Carpooling helps.

      Each kid picks a #1 top choice camp that I try really hard to make work. They can also list a second and third choice camps. Those I make work if reasonable. This allows me to prioritize my work hours. I avoid 3 kids in 3 different camps whenever possible. Our local university is a good source of older kid camps with reasonable hours. Also allows me to have them in different camps at mostly the same location.

      If they are home, there are rules about screen time and I set the downtime on their devices accordingly (generously but there are limits) and there are some chores like empty dishwasher if it’s your turn and put away laundry.

      When I WFH we go over the reasons for interruption. Not being able to find the peanut butter to make a snack is not a reason. The upstairs bathroom toilet flooding is a reason etc. I take a break for 10-15 minutes every two hours (roughly) to answer non essential questions or hang out for a few minutes. I start a little earlier than I would during the school year and they get breakfast/do chores on their own and have some screen time in the morning.

      On weeks with no camp I try to plan something fun for when I’m not working. Even if that’s just a Starbucks run and trip to the pool after work.

      1. I can’t stand being talked to through the closed bathroom door. So I always respond “is the house on fire? Is someone bleeding? If no, ask me when I’m done.”

        It’s usually something like “mom, where did I leave my shoes?” But to be honest my husband is just as bad about it!

  10. How much do you “ration” nice everyday things? I’ve gotten very into coffee, and I got some really nice coffee beans from somewhere I travel 1 – 2 times a year for work. I can’t order the coffee to the US but I’ll have the chance to buy it every so often. I have 0.5 kg of beans. Would you use these every day, and if I run out early, I run out? Or save it? I always struggle with this. I’m leaning towards just using the beans every day, they’re good beans but not something extraordinary, and its kinda nice to work remotely but with something related to the main office location

    1. I saw a tweet once that said don’t ration pleasure, so I’m working on that. Use it up!

      1. This!!! I used to be a rationer and then would find that I never ended up using up the stuff I was excited about! So now I use the nice stuff frequently and try to consciously be in the moment, enjoying it.

    2. I use the good coffee every day until it runs out. Coffee eventually starts to lose flavor so there’s no reason to save it for a special occasion. Same with the good olive oil and anything else that will only lose quality eventually as it sits around.

    4. Definitely use them daily and really enjoy it, especially because coffee beans start to get stale after a few weeks when opened.

    5. I’d go with whatever schedule allows you to best savor and enjoy, and dump the idea of “rationing.” To me, “rationing” implies a starting point of “going without” and “scarcity.” So either just drink it with abandon and enjoy the fun of it while it lasts, or choose how you want to savor it. Since it sounds like you’re cautious with enjoyment, I’d recommend that you go the route of drinking it with abandon and enjoying it while it lasts.

      Personally, I’d probably create a fun ritual around it — maybe that bag would be my Friday morning cup of coffee, part of the reward at the end of a work week. I might even buy a special mug the next time I’m at the main office city, to go with it.

    7. I make things special to a particular day. For example, pain au chocolat is on Sundays. Fridays are for swimming, etc. not a law, but a rhythm that makes days special for different reasons.

      In your case I’d only use the special coffee on Mondays (or if sufficient quantity only weekdays) because if the cosy wfh / workplace association

    8. My life has gotten better since I stopped “saving” nice things for a certain occasion. I use the fancy notebook as a work scratchpad, wear the good makeup and haircare even though I WFH, burn the expensive candle whenever I want to burn a candle, etc. Even if you never get that same coffee again, using it up and enjoying it will be much more pleasant than trying to ration it and getting anxious you’re “wasting” it.

    9. Either you don’t use it because it goes bad, or you don’t use it because you used it up. I’d rather be in the latter category! Personally I use nice coffee on weekends when I’m savoring vs gulping, but otherwise enjoy.

    10. Use it. Those beans are never going to be better than they are today. They don’t keep forever.

      I have the same impulse with “nice” things like jewelry and cosmetics. I have said to myself aloud, “Anon, you own this. You can use it.” Yesterday I wore two strand of pearls to get takeout sushi and go to the bakery for bread. I mean, why not?

    11. I’ve typically been the type to save things, which usually meant they’d go bad or sit in a cabinet forever. But I recently saw a reel to the effect of “Being alive is the special occasion” – so I’m trying to use those things now, whenever the mood strikes.

      Just today I heard of two 30-something women dying suddenly in the last week. Being here today is a miracle.

    12. Drink it, enjoy it. You deserve it! Also, the natural oils in coffee means it won’t keep.

  11. What is the best cotton blend fabric for t-shirts if my priority is durability? 100% cotton or something else?

      1. Yup. I have 100% cotton shirts from high school that are still the same color without holes (I am in my 30s) and are going strong either for me or have become hand-me-downs to my nieces. Meanwhile, polyester or poly/cotton blend t-shirt I got much later have already become ratty and not wearable outside the house.

    2. I was surprised by the t-shirts at JC Penney. St. John, I think, was the brand. Very hefty, substantial 100% cotton. Really inexpensive, too. The trick to keeping cotton nice for a while is not to use the dryer, though.

  12. I’ve got a colleague who is a new mom and seems to be having a very difficult time coming back to work. Some of the other moms have commented on this. No judgment from me as I don’t have kids and can’t imagine what she’s going through, but I feel bad seeing her struggle so much. What can I do as a colleague to support her other than listen?

    1. I think it depends on what the struggle is – my advice is different depending on whether it’s because she wants to be with her baby instead of work, or whether she wants to be at work but is physically and mentally at capacity with the needs of her baby.

      1. I think it’s the former, but that she is also mentally not in a good place. I have no idea if it’s affecting her work, but she seems so despondent I am concerned about her as a person.

        1. I will say that returning to work was a huge PPD trigger for me. It was awful, and I didn’t get help early enough because I figured it was just a rough adjustment. Ask her how she’s doing for real.

        2. are you close enough with her as a colleague to say something? i had terrible terrible PPD/PPA, and returning to work actually helped me, but i was so freakin tired sometimes i felt delirious (i honestly think those of us who have multiples should have maternity leaves that are twice as long).

    3. It’s a hard adjustment and hard to say what she needs without knowing your workplace. When I returned in early 2023, it was to an all male team who all had SAHWs and didn’t understand why I couldn’t join calls at 6pm or needed to step out of meetings after a few hours to pump. My husband is incredibly supportive and did a lot, otherwise I probably would’ve had a complete breakdown. I was pretty close as it was.

      I would listen to her and try to ascertain what she needs. Is it more flexibility at work? Outsourcing some at home to preserve her sanity? Or just rough adjusting to a difficult phase of life and balancing it all, in which case just listen.

    4. I would ask her. Tell her you know that heading back to work can be a challenge and you’d like to help but you’re not sure what would help. Make a couple suggestions but make it clear you’re just throwing ideas out there and you are open to other things.

      Does she want to go for a walk with you at lunchtime to get some fresh air and exercise? Is she finding the commute long and would like recommendations for a podcast or audio book?

      Don’t discount the value of just listening. Sometimes being heard matters a lot.

  13. Travis Kelce leaving the super bowl in that sparkly outfit – I guess when you’re deciding what to wear to the game you don’t think about potentially having to wear that after if you lose.

    Although people would have commented on it if he had changed too.

    1. I’m sure people will find a way to blame Taylor for picking his outfit even though camp outfits are de rigeur for the Super Bowl players…

    2. What a humiliation. And I am sure Taylor is both responsible for picking that ‘fit and also feels differently about him now that she is dating a loser. The out outfit was clearly meant for the after-party, not for hanging your head in shame and crying on your mom’s shoulder after being totally completely utterly outmatched and shut down by a better team. (And might I add, the team the entire family and his girlfriend (for now) would be rooting for but for him.) Apparently she jetted away soon after the loss and I would expect it will be a while before they are together again, with potentially a breakup soon.. She is not one to be associated with a loser and I don’t think she can look at him the same way again. Between that and the “Viva Las Vegas” thing, she’s definitely got the ick. But yeah, he should have brought another outfit but then again, it was arrogance that put them in that embarrassing position to lose that BIG. He needs to either quit or get his focus back. Seeing him galavanting around with his superstar girlfriend instead of focusing on his own job has always convinced me he was going to lose his step, and really they’ve pulled Mahomes and his wife into the whole TS lifestyle and you can see the results. But she breaks everything she touches, so it was to be expected

        1. I mean, football is boring, even when your boyfriend is playing. She was there in the stadium so she didn’t even have commercials to entertain her.

        3. The crowd also cheered Trump so…not a crowd of people I’d really care to be celebrated by. TS is just fine.

  14. The new ads in the middle of the page on mobile are very annoying. They are between every 2-3 posts.

    4. Yes, please stop these ads. I will stop reading otherwise because they are so annoying.

      1. +1 on my laptop too. I don’t mind the adds in the margin (I have to mute because some are autoplay); the blog needs to make money. But these mid-thread ads are super annoying. I thought the comment thread was really short.

    7. Same. At least the one at the bottom of the screen that was impossible to avoid tapping is gone?

  15. Has anyone tried Muscle Activation Technique or a similar method to address muscle imbalances and injury prevention?

    Backstory is I decided to budget for a personal trainer this year. I’ve been lifting weights (barbells, heavy weight) off and on for a few years and looking to have someone develop a plan for me and watch for form beyond what I can find online. Trainer is big on preventing injury and did a muscle assessment and diagnosed that I have a lot of weaknesses/imbalances. She’s certified in Muscle Activation Technique and I used a few of my PT sessions to address, and after each one I have some pain which she says is due to the muscles reorienting to their proper place. Then I did a long run Sunday and my back has been hurting since which never happens and idk if it’s due to the imbalances in my hips being adjusted or what.

    She hasn’t done much in the actual personal training front which is frustrating, only wants me using machines and not lifting heavy bc “you’re not ready”. Before I saw her I was regularly deadlifting 200+ and squatting 150, but my glutes and ankles aren’t firing right I guess.

    Trying to figure out if I should stick with this MAT or move on. I guess good in the long run if the imbalances are addressed but it’s really causing problems for me now.

    1. “which she says is due to the muscles reorienting to their proper place.”
      “due to the imbalances in my hips being adjusted”

      These do not sound like real things. Getting certified in “Muscle Activation Technique” is also not a real thing. I’d go to a physical therapist if you continue to have pain and in the meantime I’d get a different personal trainer.

    3. Get a second opinion. It isn’t possible for me to know, based on what you have written, if your muscles aren’t firing properly or if she’s full of it.

    4. See a real doctor and a real physical therapist for your newly-found pain that appeared after you tried a new training technique. This woman sounds like a quack!

    5. Your body will naturally have imbalances. Your limbs are not equal lengths, your spine may not be perfectly straight, you have a dominant side, etc. Most likely you have lived with this your entire life, your muscles, ligaments, cartilage have all adapted. Working on an imbalance can throw everything else off. See a PT, not every imbalance needs to corrected.

  16. I’m going on an important date (like a romantic date) in a few weeks to a Broadway show in New York. I’m likely wearing a black, long sleeve velvet dress. I’ll have to walk 13 minutes to the theater. What shoes should I wear with this dress that won’t get destroyed on the streets of New York? I should also point out that I’ve had foot surgery (on both feet) in the last year and stiletto heels are out.

    Here is the dress: https://www.ralphlauren.com/women-clothing-dresses/stretch-velvet-surplice-dress/0077885358.html?utm_source=organiccse&utm_medium=GooglePLA&gQT=1

    2. I’d do the dressiest shoes you can within your specific needs post-surgery. Not much help, but I don’t know how much support you need, whether you can tolerate any heel, whether you can do pointed toes or need rounded toes, etc.

    3. Not that you asked, but unless this is an opening night, you’re going to be pretty overdressed for Broadway. The dress is gorgeous but do you have a more casual option? Most people will just come in whatever they were wearing that day (e.g. work clothes). Also it might be snowing. If you really want to wear the dress you could wear winter boots for the walk and then change at the theater.

      1. +1 to this. People will also be in jeans and sneakers. If you don’t mind being overdressed, it is fine. But do you know if your date will be similarly dressed up?

        If you still decide to wear this dress, it seems like the best option for shoes would be tall flat boots with tights. Check the weather as the event gets closer and adjust if needed.

    5. I would flip your planning. Figure out what shoes you can tolerate then plan the outfit

    7. Do you have the ability to check a bag align with your coat? If so, wear comfy shoes for the walk over and then change into whatever you would normally wear for the show.

    10. Opaque tights and sock ankle boots would be my choice, but if you’ve had surgery I’d go for the comfort of shoes you already own and know to be comfortable.

      1. Or if you really need orthopedic brand, try Bionic for ballet flats. I think that would be fine with that dress, even though the optimum would be a heel, which is just not going to work under these circumstances.

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